On Thursday, April 21, 16-year-old trans high school student James Van Kuilenburg was forced to vacate a Ted Cruz campaign rally in Frederick, Maryland.

Guys, it turns out that Ted Cruz’s bigoted tendencies are NBD, because the presidential hopeful’s former college roommate and current biffle David Panton, who happens to be a person of color from Jamaica, told The New York Times otherwise. Good to know!

Ted Cruz, a bigot and a troll pandering to the worst impulses of the Republican party, has broken. He’s broke now. A sandwich did it.

It’s worth reminding ourselves now and again that while Donald Trump is a soulless corn husk shilling for votes, Ted Cruz is both that and also an even more genuinely horrifying person, in that he fervently believes every hateful word he utters. Case in point: a new ad by Cruz for President that supports anti-trans…

Is there a more anti-American rumor you could start about a presidential candidate???

Conservative talk show host and Trump toady Sean Hannity interviewed Ted Cruz, actual toad, on Tuesday prior to Cruz’s thundering loss against Trump and Ben Carson. Despite the fact that they share a loosening jawline and sense of disdain for most of humanity, the pair did not see eye to eye.

It’s been a rough night for Ted Cruz. Across the state of New York, he’s almost guaranteed to come in last place of the three remaining candidates. And in at least one district in Westchester, Ted Cruz coming in last of the remaining candidates and someone who isn’t even running anymore.

In case you needed to be reminded that Ted Cruz is “not” the Zodiac Killer, here you go.

Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz has been doing quite a lot of dildo talk these days.

On Thursday evening, while Democratic candidates Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders wore away at each other and the nation with an aural nail file, Republican candidates attended a gala with 800 of their closest donors.

CNN aired its third incredibly, mind-bendingly gentle “Town Hall” Wednesday night. This time it featured Ted Cruz, Creature from the Black Lagoon and GOP presidential candidate, whose long-suffering wife and young daughters (in matching outfits and hair bows) were on hand to distract viewers from Daddy’s medieval…

Rejoice and be glad, for it is time for an update on The Slot’s favorite political commentator. Craig Mazin, Ted Cruz’s completely delightful college roommate, is back. Fuckin’ Craig. Love that guy.

And, honestly, probably still is.

CNN, for reasons known only to them and their makers, is hosting a series of “town halls” this week with the remaining three GOP candidates and their families. The Trump edition aired last night: it featured gentle questions from Anderson Cooper and a loving, adulatory audience. It was fucking gross. This whole…

In the lead-up to New York’s April 19 primary, both Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders have released NY-centric ads focusing on the fact that they’re not hideous bigots. Sanders’ ad focuses on his “New York values,” as a subtle fuck-you to Ted Cruz, while the Clinton ad focuses on the terrifying nightmare that is a…

Ted Cruz, that bloated fragment of sea junk, seemingly forgot that he would ever have to deal with the state that he publicly insulted on the debate stage in January. But of course he has to deal with New York, because it’s New York, and he’s running for president. And New York is now like, “Haha, no thanks.”

Ted Cruz, GOP presidential candidate and sinister twin of Ratigan, has publicly denied the National Enquirer’s allegations of his marital infidelity.

KKK rally port-a-potty holding tanks Ted Cruz and Donald Trump have teamed up against the real enemy: John Kasich.

Hey, here is the worst thing I’ve ever seen!

CNN held a town hall last night for the remaining three GOP candidates, as though you don’t see them in your screeching nightmares every time you close your eyes. In the midst of a fairly friendly interview, Anderson Cooper found time to tell Donald Trump he’s acting like a fucking child.