Jezebel 
Enter your username and password.
-
posts about #strangequestions more → 
Author Asks: If Every Man Could Have Gay Sex, Why Would He Need Women?
New York, 8:13 PM
Mon Nov 9
52 posts in the last 24 hours
Tip your editors:
tips@jezebel.com
Editor-in-Chief:
Anna Holmes
Email | Twitter
Deputy Editor:
Dodai Stewart
Email | Twitter
Senior Contributing Editor:
Tracie Egan
Email | Twitter
Contributing Editors:
Anna North
Email | Twitter
Sadie Stein
Email | Twitter
Reporter:
Irin Carmon
Email
Editorial Assistant:
Margaret Hartmann
Email | Twitter
Contributors:
Jenna Sauers
Email
Rich Juzwiak
Email | Twitter
Lizzie Skurnick
Email
Interns:
Katy Kelleher
Twitter
| posts about #strangequestions more → |
Author Asks: If Every Man Could Have Gay Sex, Why Would He Need Women? |
Original material is licensed under a Creative Commons License permitting non-commercial sharing with attribution.
07/03/09
07/02/09
07/02/09
07/02/09
07/02/09
Seriously, dudes, if you like having sex with other men, then please do so (safely and consensually.) But it's absolutely bizarre to say that OMG ALL MEN WILL TURN THEIR BACKS ON PUSSY FOREVER BECAUSE BUTTS ARE WHERE IT IS AT.
07/02/09
Really? Hasn't women's homo/bi-sexuality been well documented, aren't women considered more "fluid" in their sexuality? IF what he thinks is true then WHY would women "choose" to NOT be with a man, ever?
Not to mention I can find sexual satisfaction without another woman OR man, its called a pocket rocket Sir.
Although I can sort of see where he is trying to go with the man on man stuff, if I was a guy I'd rather be gay anytime! But then again I'm a straight woman, so maybe my ideas are a bit skewed. However, I guess this plays into the whole homosexuality is a choice thing? (I'm guessing he thinks it is.)
I just don't see what would prevent a man from getting it on with other men if he wanted, societal norms or not. I think this guy is missing the point which is YOU CAN'T CHOOSE TO BE GAY.
Some men dig the men, some don't. I don't think its about society inconveniencing them to the point that its easier to fuck women.
07/02/09
07/02/09
For centuries and centuries, the idea of male arousal and male pleasure has been pretty much the ultimate goal of pretty much any image perceived as "sexy", right? Because the menfolks, they're in CHARGE! The menfolks, they need to get their rocks off! The menfolks, THEY JUST CAN'T RESTRAIN THEIR URGES, THE POOR SAPS, WE MIGHT AS WELL TITILLATE THEM!
We get socialized with these images, and ultimately, these images get tied into our definitions of what's "sexy" and what's supposed to be arousing. So since we mostly see sexual imagery that's geared toward straight men, it's considered "sexy" if a woman gets turned on by sexual imagery that's geared toward a straight man. If you're in a marginalized group and you try to emulate the dominant group, chances are, you'll be more accepted by that dominant group, right?
So, since it's considered sexy for women to be turned on by women (see also: Katy Perry's mindless drivel), there's this whole trope of "OH, WOMEN ARE MORE BI THAN MEN." And they're probably not, as a whole. Orientation exists on a spectrum; it's not black and white. I think, however, that many men are socialized to find homosexuality somehow "shameful" or "weak", and thus they don't want to admit that they may actually be somewhere on that spectrum.
Of course, this doesn't mean that EVERYONE is a little bit bi, or that EVERYONE is either totally straight or gay. It doesn't. Some people really are never attracted to someone of the same sex, ever, and that's that. Some people are ONLY attracted to the same sex. Some people are a little bit of both, or they find that their orientation is fluid and changes over time. It's just that the "Oh, all women are a little bi!" trope is not only nonsensical and way way too broad of a definition, but it also plays into the whole "male gaze" phenomenon and the concept of male desire as being the ULTIMATE OMG THING.
07/02/09
07/02/09
07/02/09
And it really is amazing to see how little the idea of love or companionship means to these guys, because obviously all any man wants is to stick his dick in any available hole. The idea that a man might want more from a relationship with either a woman or man never seems to occur to them.
07/02/09
07/02/09
07/02/09
Why are some social conservatives so seemingly insecure about their own heterosexuality?
07/02/09
07/02/09
07/02/09
@token_starless_commenter: Yeah, I have the same suspicion...
07/02/09
Seriously? Someone needs to sit this guy down and explain to him that sexuality is a spectrum, it's one way or the other only. I mean, I'm as hetero as a gal can be (I appreciate the female form, but it does nothing at all for my ladybits), and even I understand that while some people may be more like me and prefer the opposite sex, some go for the same, and some are somewhere in between.
For cheesus sake, go out and actually make some friends who aren't part of your normal circle, Mr. Beliefnet Man.
And also, isn't the idea that all men want is a warm place to put it also degredating to men of any sexuality? Fo' real (I'm not even gonna touch on women who love women since that's apparently outside of what his mind can comprehend).
07/02/09
07/02/09
07/02/09
07/02/09
07/02/09
And if a gay man started dating woman, that wouldn't mean he's no longer gay - that would mean he's bisexual.
Personally, I've never been with a woman and have really no desire to be. But I'm not going to say that as a 20-something that I will NEVER in my life find someone that I will fall in love with and it happens to be a woman. Who can rule that out? I've seen that shit happen too many times to consider it a fluke.
07/02/09
She's still attracted to women, of course; it doesn't mean she's magically "straight". And not everyone makes this sort of transition. But I do think some people do experience some fluidity in the way they define their orientation.
07/02/09
I think it's a nice sentiment, and surely we should all be open to whatever the future holds for us, but I think saying that all people are bi is a little bit of the overstatement.
07/02/09
07/02/09
07/02/09
Scared Rooo is scared. Carry on.
07/02/09
You need to have sex to procreate (without medical technology). If pre-civilization man preferred sex with other men we wouldn't exist. There is a biological drive to procreate for most people. That doesn't mean heterosexuality is the only natural way to be, but it can't be some socially created thing.
07/02/09
07/03/09