For one, I have the whitest of pale white legs, and I don't tan, so for most of my life I was really, really uncomfortable with my skin color. Pantyhose made my legs look (in my mind) less cadaver-like and more socially acceptable, and in the humid-as-hell D.C. summers I'd wear pants to the office and avoid skirts all together. But, then there were cute skirts! And open-toed shoes! And a business casual office! And lots of other women with really white legs that they weren't embarrassed about, so I forced myself to get over it (and to shave my legs more than every six months).

The other time I pretty consistently wore stockings was when I was a lot heavier. I used to buy the mega-control top ones that sucked everything in so that I could get away with wearing the clothes I didn't really fit into and didn't want to replace, to hide my under-belt belly as much as possible and smooth out my ass and still pretend I was a size 14. I wore them under pants and bought Spanx for the summer and then finally, finally got off my widening ass and did something about the weight other than pretend a pair of stockings could fool everyone when the only person they ever fooled was me.

Nowadays, the only time I really wear stockings is in the winter. I have only gone out once in cold weather in a skirt without stockings (a walk of shame, actually) and as I stood on a corner hailing a cab home with my balled up fishnets in my pocket, I silently cursed at myself for deciding that unrolling them hungover was too difficult because, holy hell, were my thighs freezing in a way that thighs should never freeze. But anytime I do wearing stockings, I take them off as soon as I get home — before I even take off my bra — because the sweet release of removing the encasing nylon is just too good to put off.

One reason I've never worn them, though, is because a boss required me to. It amazes that some offices require them — even under pants (and who, exactly, checks that?). Is it just that I live in a swamp that I've never had a dress code like that regardless of my job?

Bare-Legged Ladies: Hosiery Reveals Office Divide [WSJ]