http://tags.gawker.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/jezebel.com.png http://jezebel.com/tag/stevens http://jezebel.com/tag/stevens

• Hillary Clinton has not agreed to be Obama's Secretary of State even if she is officially offered it. [Politico]
• She has, however, been asked to head Ted Kennedy's health reform task force next year. [The Hill]
• Mr. Jowls will remain the Chairman of the Committee on Homeland Security. Jane Hamsher and others say, in so many words, fuck that guy. [Politico, Firedoglake, Politico]
• Chuck Norris might be able to defeat ninjas, cowboys and anyone who talks back, but what he's really, really scared of is boys who like to kiss other boys (we assume that, like most raging homophobes, he furiously masturbates to girl-on-girl porn). Chuck Norris, I have watched gay bear porn and survived with nary a scratch. I double dog dare you. [Queerty]

• In the mean time, Eric Holder appears poised to become this country's first African-American attorney general. Some people have their panties all in a bunch that he might or might not have had something to do with the 11th hour pardon of Marc Rich in the Clinton Administration. [Newsweek]
• Beau Biden, on the other hand, will not accept an appointment to his father's Senate seat and will likely deploy to Iraq as planned. [Washington Post]
• Less gracious is outgoing Representative Marilyn Musgrave (R-Colorado) who has yet to officially concede the race she lost in a landslide to Democrat Betsy Markey or thank her staff, but what would you expect from the woman who staked her legislative career on trying to pass a Constitutional amendment to forever prohibit same sex marriage? [Politico]
• Speaking of controversial pardons, apparently Ted Stevens wants one. [Politico]
• Republicans are trying to decide whether to try and trample people's rights in order to regain some semblance of political relevance, or whether they'd like to try doing stuff for the Real Americans they so desperately swear they represent. [Huffington Post]
• Chuck Hagel pretty much said that Rush Limbaugh can go fuck himself during a speech. I say that all the time, Chuck! Want to grab a drink and make fun of him sometime? [CNN]
• Diane Sawyer conducted her interview with Ashley Alexandra Dupre, originally famous for fucking former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer for money, who, if this picture is any guide, will heretofore be known for sneaking into Sarah Palin's tanning beds one too many times and stealing Jane Fonda's steez from 9 to 5. It's unclear whether she actually says anything to make the interview worth watching, but since she's probably not going to dish about whether Spitzer really tried to fuck her up the ass without a condom while wearing his socks and singing show tunes, I'm guessing not. Fine, I never really heard rumors of show tunes. [Huffington Post]

]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5092496&view=rss&microfeed=true

• Officials are confirming that Hillary Clinton met with Barack Obama in Chicago to talk about a potential Cabinet slot. Two "senior Democratic officials" confirmed to the Huffington Post that Clinton was offered Secretary of State and asked for time to consider it, but she didn't admit to anything at a press conference in Albany. [NY Times, Huffington Post]
• Barack Obama and John McCain are going to meet this weekend to talk about how they might be able to work together on something once Obama is President. It was arranged by Senator Lindsay Graham, McCain's Number One Fanboy. [Washington Post]
• Vermont Senator Pat Leahy became the one who broke the seal, announcing today that he's not going to support Connecticut Senator Joe "Turncoat" Lieberman's efforts to hold onto his committee chairmanship in the Democratic-controlled Senate since Lieberman isn't a Democrat, campaigned against the incoming Democratic President and endorsed a Republican. Glad someone has more of a spine than Harry Reid. [Washington Post]
• Speaking of backbones, thousands of people are expecting to protest the passage of Proposition 8 tomorrow, in California and around the country. [Huffington Post]

• Other things coming to Washington include: Barack Obama's favorite pizza in Chicago, which is not Chicago-style but is, I guarantee, better than all but about 5 pizza outlets in the D.C. Metro area. [Huffington Post]
• FDIC Chairwoman Sheila Bair (a contender for the Treasury Secretary slot in an Obama Administration, if the rumors are true) unveiled her $25 million plan to stop 1.5 million foreclosures next year by offering incentives to financial institutions to reduce homeowners' monthly payments. Current Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson reportedly hates the idea, preferring to spend the money buying stock in banks and encouraging addition lending, let alone that he doesn't want to have to cede 3.5 percent of his Congressional spending authority to a girl to, like, help struggling Real Americans instead of banks. [Washington Post]
• California Congressman Dan Lungen is planning on challenging Ohio Congressman John Boehner for House Minority Leader. I wonder if he knows the perma-tan isn't one of the perks? [CNN]
• Former Maryland Lt. Governor Michael Steele wants to take over the Republican National Committee. He faces a mass of other people that didn't have prime time speaking roles at the Republican National Convention. [Politico]
• McCain campaign manager Rick Davis took responsibility for not paying how much attention "a gal from New York" they hired to shop for Sarah Palin spent on her wardrobe since they didn't give her a budget or look at the bills. That only took until after your guy lost, dickwad. Nice timing. [CNN]
• Outgoing corrupt Republican Congressman Rick Renzi of Arizona (who will be replaced by Democrat Ann Kirkpatrick) will face racketeering and other new charges when he eventually goes to trial on being a corrupt bastard. [Huffington Post]
• Renzi's colleague-in-corruption Alaska Senator Ted Stevens has fallen behind in his bid to win re-election to the Senate seat he'd be forced from once he had to report to the clink. [LA Times]
• Joe The Motherfucking Plumber has a motherfucking book deal. I, on the other hand, do not. I can ask stupid questions! I swear! Call me, publishers? [Huffington Post]

]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5087855&view=rss&microfeed=true