Today in Tweet Beat, Kirstie Alley is still hung up on publicly losing weight, Holly Madison learns a lesson, and Kathy Najimy learns to spin fire.

Today in Tweet Beat, Bob Saget remembers old times, Candace Cameron has new shoes, Jane Fonda is hanging out with Cat Stevens, and the Fort Hood tragedy reminds Hugh Hefner—and us—how freaking old he is.

Today in Tweet Beat, Jon Gosselin says the court divided his family, Yoko Ono loves Lady Gaga, and Rihanna tweets for the first time.

Today in Tweet Beat, Jody Watley is jealous that Ellen DeGeneres has two jobs, Stevie Wonder watches Real Housewives of Atlanta, and Kim Zolciak does her usual climbing.

Today in Tweet Beat, Shanna Moakler bought a quote book, Steven Seagal endorses his energy drink, Carrie Prejean is busy writing a book, and Kim Zolciak's pathetic Twitter climbing finally pays off!

Today in Tweet Beat, Perez Hilton insults Rachel Zoe and Lily Allen. The latter threatens his life. Also, Stephanie Pratt wants to learn how to walk, and Courtney Love discusses Gwyneth Paltrow's dignity.

• Melanie Griffith's rep confirmed that she has checked into a rehab facility saying, "This is part of a routine plan that was designed between her and her doctors years ago." But sources say husband Antonio Banderas demanded she get sober.

This week's multimedia compilation of pop culture crap features stupid idiots, Steven Seagal, wigs on dogs, and Models of the Runway.

• OMG! Project Runway's Tim Gunn will host the red-carpet arrivals at the official Academy Awards pre-show? Genius. Good Morning America's Robin Roberts and Entertainment Weekly's Jess Cagle will join him. Excellent. Carry on! [Variety]

• Aww, lookit: BritBrit on the cover of Rolling Stone, looking healthy and happy. She says: "I feel like an old person now. I do! I go to bed at, like, 9:30 every night, and I don't go out or anything." Oh! But Britney did go on a date recently, and took her assistant and a manager's friend with her. "Right when we got…