What I don't understand is WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH PEE?
I mean, I love female ejaculation. I like watching it in porn. I like it happening in real life. I even did it for the first time ever only a few weeks ago (though I have yet to repeat the fluke, despite quite a bit of trying). I think it's important and beautiful to show and to see- to know that it is normal, natural, and can be a turn-on.
And while I think it's pretty silly when squirting is faked in porn and it's just urine, I find it offensive just because it's faked, not because it's urine.
Some people have urine fetishes. Urine is safe and sterile (unlike, say, scat). I just don't see what the big deal is if you have everybody in a porn movie peeing all over each other and bathing in a yellow-filled kiddie pool.
Of course, I'm still pretty pissed that the British Board Of Film Classification didn't pass the lesbian-porn-by-and-for-lesbians "Candy Stars Uncensored". Grrr.
I'm getting the feeling that the board believes FE to be the same thing as pissing because when FE is portrayed in pornography, it often IS pissing. FE exists, but rarely is it truly depicted in pornography. I'm not saying there is no porn with real, honest to goddess FE, but rather, it is a rarity.
I think a big reason why there is much debate about the existence of female ejaculation and the G spot orgasm is that some men are very threatened by the sexual functions of women that they don't understand.
It's like when a man is upset and takes it personally when he can't make a woman have an orgasm on command. So much of being masculine in our society is the ability to "please your woman", so when they can't easily do that, they don't feel manly.
I started thinking on this when a friend of mine who was saying how he doesn't want any of his girlfriends to ever have vibrators. I asked him why and he said, flat out, he's scared of how he'll measure up, and that she won't "need" him.
This kind of attitude pisses me off quite a bit. It makes it seem like women only start up and continue relationships with men only because of the sexual aspect, and I feel that takes away the significance a real loving relationship can have.
I told him he was really scared of a woman who is confident sexually and who knows how to please herself. That can be a very threatening thing for some men. I also think that's a factor of why virgins are such a fetish as well.
@little_librarian: To add to your second paragraph, what follows is women staying in relationships that give them NO sexual pleasure without speaking up and saying "HEY, UR DOIN IT RONG" and faking it to protect their guy's delicate ego. This, among other things, has created a culture of hooking up that is 100% about the male orgasm and women get no pleasure at all. I have multiple friends who don't orgasm from anything other than masturbation, and unfortunately they're in the majority. It really saddens me that SO many women have completely pleasureless sex.
@Eriu: Yes, you are so right on. I also know women in relationships like that, where any kind of mention of female pleasure is considered practically taboo.
Add what you said to the fact that some men think porn is an instructional tool, and it can make for a pretty miserable time.
@little_librarian: Oy, porn may be the biggest culprit of all when it comes to most men thinking they're TOTALLY AWESOME in bed when actually they suck, and women thinking that moaning indiscriminately makes them good at sex, further convincing the dudes.
@Conrad: Reading Mary Roach's book "Stiff" made me want to donate my body to science! (I must admit, it's more because of the crazy adventures I can be a part of after death than altuistic reasons)
I was once lectured by a tremendously patronising male sexologist about how women who ejaculated were just deluding themselves.
Unfortunately it wasn't in a situation where I could respond: "Well, it doesn't surprise me that YOU have never witnessed it."
@LaFemme: thank you for clearing that up. the only spanish i ever seem to remember is terrible insults. granted, they find their way into my everyday vernacular on a more regular basis, but they're not as useful overall.
I think what the BBFC (the BBFCC is apparently the 'British Border Fancy Canary Club', which is, I assume, not what you meant) is trying to say is that IN PORN a lot of female porn stars fake squirting by urinating, for obvious reasons (I know from experience that you don't ejaculate every time you orgasm, even if you do ejaculate, and I doubt they come very often while they're working anyway). I'm a fan of the BBFC in general, I've got to say, especially compared to the US equivalent.
@FizzyGood: No necessarily true. I know a lot of women, one firsthand, that can control female ejaculation. It's like wiggling a nose, etc. All about control and some women can do it on command.
@FizzyGood: How could you possibly know that a female porn start is faking? And how could you possible prove they are urinating? Just because you don't ejaculate every time you orgasm doesn't mean other women don't ejaculate every time they orgasm.
Edited by Vivelafat says Sweep the leg, Johnny. at 10/08/09 4:58 PM
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@Vivelafat says Sweep the leg, Johnny.: How could you prove they're not urinating? That's the POINT. I'm not judging anybody here, ffs, and maybe other women do ejaculate every which way at the drop of a hat, I don't know - fair enough, I was extrapolating from too little evidence. Sorry. I'm just giving a different perspective on why the BBFC has the rules it does.
@brokenscope: I was referring to the MPAA, which is different, you're right. But the BBFC isn't some kind of crazed censorship machine either, it has a couple of rules I don't agree with, but it's not that big a deal I don't think.
@FizzyGood: Can I also point out that the BBFC didn't come up with the obscenity law which disallows urine in a sexual context? It's a stupid law, I agree, but the BBFC is just enforcing it.
I saw a Squirt bottle in the convenience store today and had to hold back a giggle.
I've read up on the female ejaculation stuff, and as far as I can tell it's not identical to peeing, but there could be a little pee in there. Which kind of lines up with the experiences of a vagina of my acquaintance. Said vagina also has to reassure its owner that it does not make them gross if there is some in there. That's what towels are for.
How is it possible that the BBFCC can deny an actual medical fact? Wouldn't there be some kind of sexual discrimination in their ban, being that it is medically proven the female ejaculation is not urine and that by it very nature it can only happen to women?
Trying to convince men you didn't just urinate on them is hard enough, imagine how difficult it must be with the British Film Classification Board actually supporting the idea that it is urine. I see a generation of teen age girls (and other self conscious women) cringing in embarrassment over something that A. they can't control and B. HAS BEEN MEDICALLY DISPROVED!!!!!
@Vivelafat says Sweep the leg, Johnny.: The part about teenagers is so true. I wish that we had comprehensive sex education that would teach about normal bodily functions so that young girls won't be embarrassed or hold back on their pleasure.
@thePrototype: I can just picture a girl ejaculating and being ridiculed by her sexual partner. That's the kind of thing that gets around school as "I fucked so and so and she totally PEED on me while we were doing it." Then you become the PEE girl. I mean that's kind of exactly what the BBFC is doing to all women in porn. It's like they are writing " I FUCKED A PORN STAR AND SHE PEED ON ME" on the bathroom wall.
Edited by Vivelafat says Sweep the leg, Johnny. at 10/08/09 5:17 PM
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@Vivelafat says Sweep the leg, Johnny.: It's too bad that they are so ashamed of natural functions. My husband told me about the first time he made a girl ejaculate (he was 17, she was 15), and they had no idea what had happened and she was so ashamed and after that she was really afraid of orgasming. I was lucky, I was around the same age, but the guy knew what was going on, and it has always just been a natural thing for me.
Could you imagine the outrage in schools if this was actually taught?
re: ejaculation in porn, it has helped a lot of women and men out by normalizing it, but on the other hand I do think that it has brought up expectations for women to ejaculate. It's a bit of a double edged sword.
The disbelief in female ejaculation and G-spot orgasm annoy me to no end as someone who has both regularly. Myths about the former make it awkward when it happens, and myths about the latter only add to the laundry list of reasons why so many dudes are terrible at pleasing women, or don't care/try, thus perpetuating the myth. It really creeps me out on a deep level that we as a society don't want to believe that these types of female pleasure exist.
Some women can squirt and some cannot and both are ok. I have tried all forms of stimulation on my own and with partners and cannot, so I'm really getting tired of this pervasive expectation trying to make me feel like I'm a failure at sex because I can't or trying to make the man feel like a failure because he can't get me to do it.
I have orgasms, they're great, I don't need to make a mess to have fun.
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Edited by Suffragettestream the Office Hussy at 10/08/09 4:36 PM
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@Office Hussy: I'm confused how this fits with what's being discussed here. Isn't this issue about trying to make female ejaculation legitimate in public discourse, since it is so rare and misunderstood? I'm pretty sure that is the exact opposite of female ejaculation as a pervasive expectation.
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I mean, I love female ejaculation. I like watching it in porn. I like it happening in real life. I even did it for the first time ever only a few weeks ago (though I have yet to repeat the fluke, despite quite a bit of trying). I think it's important and beautiful to show and to see- to know that it is normal, natural, and can be a turn-on.
And while I think it's pretty silly when squirting is faked in porn and it's just urine, I find it offensive just because it's faked, not because it's urine.
Some people have urine fetishes. Urine is safe and sterile (unlike, say, scat). I just don't see what the big deal is if you have everybody in a porn movie peeing all over each other and bathing in a yellow-filled kiddie pool.
Of course, I'm still pretty pissed that the British Board Of Film Classification didn't pass the lesbian-porn-by-and-for-lesbians "Candy Stars Uncensored". Grrr.
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It's like when a man is upset and takes it personally when he can't make a woman have an orgasm on command. So much of being masculine in our society is the ability to "please your woman", so when they can't easily do that, they don't feel manly.
I started thinking on this when a friend of mine who was saying how he doesn't want any of his girlfriends to ever have vibrators. I asked him why and he said, flat out, he's scared of how he'll measure up, and that she won't "need" him.
This kind of attitude pisses me off quite a bit. It makes it seem like women only start up and continue relationships with men only because of the sexual aspect, and I feel that takes away the significance a real loving relationship can have.
I told him he was really scared of a woman who is confident sexually and who knows how to please herself. That can be a very threatening thing for some men. I also think that's a factor of why virgins are such a fetish as well.
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Add what you said to the fact that some men think porn is an instructional tool, and it can make for a pretty miserable time.
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There are enough male bodies out there, we need women and children. For Science!
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Is there really a shortage of female cadavers?
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Unfortunately it wasn't in a situation where I could respond: "Well, it doesn't surprise me that YOU have never witnessed it."
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. . . with vodka, or is it gin. Try both!
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sounds deelish - i love tequila/margaritas - can't wait to try a paloma
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I've read up on the female ejaculation stuff, and as far as I can tell it's not identical to peeing, but there could be a little pee in there. Which kind of lines up with the experiences of a vagina of my acquaintance. Said vagina also has to reassure its owner that it does not make them gross if there is some in there. That's what towels are for.
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Trying to convince men you didn't just urinate on them is hard enough, imagine how difficult it must be with the British Film Classification Board actually supporting the idea that it is urine. I see a generation of teen age girls (and other self conscious women) cringing in embarrassment over something that A. they can't control and B. HAS BEEN MEDICALLY DISPROVED!!!!!
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Could you imagine the outrage in schools if this was actually taught?
re: ejaculation in porn, it has helped a lot of women and men out by normalizing it, but on the other hand I do think that it has brought up expectations for women to ejaculate. It's a bit of a double edged sword.
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It's perfectly acceptable to say, "Don't drink too much coffee before a long road trip. You'll have to ejaculate every two hours."
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I have orgasms, they're great, I don't need to make a mess to have fun.
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