"Maybe you find this depressing (a brilliant comic mind inevitably reduced to shaking her cleavage). Maybe you find this empowering (a brilliant comic mind finally shaking her cleavage!)," Hepola writes, but in fact, it's neither. It's ambition, pure and simple. People who want to succeed in their chosen field do whatever they can to make themselves most "attractive" to employers. In fields that aren't acting and modeling, this means garnering experience that's most relevant to the position you want. However, as much as we may or may not like it, acting is job that is based on looks and polish — she wasn't applying for a job at a law firm or at a radio station. Was Tina Fey still hilarious when she weighed thirty pounds more and had terrible hair? Undoubtedly. Would she ever have seen screen time? Never in a million years. Can you really blame her for the choices that she made?

As our own Macloserboy eloquently noted yesterday, "Sadly, the whole physical transformation thing matters because if she didn't do it, there's a chance that no matter how smart or funny she was (and Lorne Michaels makes it clear they thought that even when she was heavier) we wouldn't even know her name. We'd just marvel twice as much at Amy Poehler who'd essentially be her mouthpiece." More pics of Tina pre-makeover are below, plus a video of the very glam Ms. Fey dancing whilst getting photographed for Vanity Fair.

First two Images via Unstirred

Other images via Dorothy Surrenders

Tina Fey, Dancing [Videogum]
The Sexing Up Of Tina Fey [Salon]

Earlier: Vanity Fair: Tina Fey Drops 30 Pounds, Is Scarred For Life

My apologies to the international Jezebels- NBC and Hulu apparently are now both blocking non-US access. Hopefully we'll have a solution soon!

• Don't Be Afraid To Look Stupid The funniest women in comedy have the ability to be as graceless as humanly possible. Lucille Ball, perhaps the Queen of Physical Comedy, was able to get around her glamour girl looks and transform herself into a humor machine, unafraid to appear awkward or silly or unattractive if it meant that the laughs were coming in. Lucy's humor comes from her humanity; she's a mess, like the rest of us, she's a goof, like everyone else. Molly Shannon embraced this and created some of SNL's best female characters; Mary Catherine Gallagher, the nervous schoolgirl with a tendency to crash through folding tables, and my personal favorite, Sally O'Malley, a 50-year-old woman who loves herself and her age beyond all things.

• Don't Get Stuck In The Mom/Girlfriend Zone The women of SNL are often relegated to playing the bewildered girlfriend, confused waitress, or stunned mother to a male lead's wackadoo character. Playing the straight man isn't the curse it might seem to be; there's a way to play it incredibly straight while still being completely hilarious. The trick is to find a balance, as Ana Gasteyer and Molly Shannon did with their "Delicious Dish" NPR characters:

• Have At Least One Good Impression In Your Arsenal If you can mock just ONE celebrity, and mock them well, you're pretty much guaranteed some screen time on SNL. Of course, it helps if the celebrity is all over the news; dusting off your Monica Lewinsky impression in 2008 isn't going to get you anywhere. Maya Rudolph was able to create insane, overblown versions of popular celebrities, including Donatella Versace, Beyonce, and of course, Whitney Houston:

• Create Your Signature Character The men of SNL are often remembered fondly for their signature characters; Mike Myers as Linda Richman, Dana Carvey as the Church Lady, and Phil Hartman as Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer. But the ladies of SNL have also created some legendary characters over the years, including Gilda Radner's Roseanne Roseannadanna and Emily Litella, Julia Sweeney's Pat, and Cheri Oteri's Collette Reardon. Kristin Wiig is currently taking up this challenge by creating such characters as the Target Lady and Penelope, while Rachel Dratch added her own character to this list with the introduction of Debbie Downer, a character that has transcended SNL and has now become a standard pop-culture reference.

• When In Doubt, Think Of Tina There is perhaps no better role model for the incoming women of SNL then Tina Fey, the woman who added to the show in every possible way, leading the writing team, anchoring Weekend Update, participating in several sketches, and creating a female-friendly environment that allowed women like Poehler, Dratch, and Rudolph to display their skills alongside their male co-stars. Also? Without Tina, there'd be no tribute to Mom Jeans:

• Work Together For a final burst of inspiration, here's a clip of some of your past and present castmates, working together to create one of the most insane, awesome SNL commercial parodies of all time. Good luck, ladies. We will all be rooting for you.

Two New Comedians Join The Cast Of 'SNL' [MSNBC]

If you are outside the US, you may view the clip here.

If you are not in the US, you may watch the clip here.

Earlier: 30 Rock Is Back And Liz Lemon's Trying To Adopt

[Celebuzz, HuffPo, Star]

If you're outside the US, you may view the clip here.

Thanks for another lovely weekend!

If you're not in the US, you may view the clip here.

Obviously the show is exaggerated and purposely satirical (duh, it's a comedy), but the difficulty Liz faces in balancing her personal life and her gangbusters career is very real. Bev is skeptical of Liz's ability to mother a child because she works 60-80 hours a week, and this is something Tina Fey admits to struggling with in her own life as well. She tells today's USA Today that working on SNL and 30 Rock has been pretty difficult. Fey is incredibly grateful for her career, however "It's just that there's nothing else. You work, and you see your family when you can, and you go to bed. I don't see any movies. It took me a year to read The Year of Magical Thinking." Even sadder for our heroine, "I never get to have wine! I always have to go to bed. I can't really bitch about it, either. We have six weeks off — that's four weeks longer than most people. And it's a job where I can bring my daughter, if I want to, and I get to be with people I love."

Aw. Here's an extra dose of Fey-cuteness to tide you over, since it sounds like she will not be on SNL this weekend. It's a vignette about her daughter, Alice:

She's in nursery school. It's pretty cute. She has a backpack that takes up the entire size of her torso. She's really proud of it. If you said to her, 'What's in your backpack?' She's really cocky and says, 'Nothing.' There's nothing in it. She just carries it.

Tina Fey Is Between A 'Rock' And A Funny Place At 'SNL' [USA Today]
30 Rock Sneak Peek: "Do-Over" [Hulu — full episode!]

Bush Endorsement [NBC]
Laughing Matters: Saturday Night Politics [New Yorker]

Crazy McCain Lady [NBC]

Related: Woman Says Mom Who Smeared Obama Menaced [UPI]

A blog post by Suzanne Muusers, a business coach, is quoted as saying Orman "personally benefits from fear mongering, and that is not what we need right now," and that Orman and others "live off selling magazines and television shows that spew irresponsible viewpoints." Orman's brand manager/ partner, Kathy Travis, says to the Journal that they turn down many of the endorsement deals that Orman is offered, particularly with banks because it could be a conflict of interest. "We have been approached by everyone — ING, Wells Fargo and HSBC. They are great companies, but in the best interest of Suze, we have a blanket rule: no banking endorsements."

For her part, Suze says fuck the haters. "There are always these people who want to attack me no matter what I do," the jacket-loving Orman tells the Journal. And speaking of Suze and her bedazzled outerwear, here's a clip from SNL of Kristen Wiig impersonating Suze and her money-saving tips for women (and if the promos are any indication, Wiig will be reprising the role this Saturday). If maxi pads are getting too expensive, fake-Orman says, you should make your own. "Buy a 24-pack of baby socks and some double sided tape," she advises, and remember, in life,"It's people, then money, then things, then homemade maxi pads."

Crisis Makes Suze Orman a Star [WSJ — sub. req.]

Earlier: The American Economic Downturn Is Tough On Jane Winebox

John Pitney Jr. a professor of American Politics at Claremont, says that SNL unfairly maligned Gerald Ford in the 70s, and perhaps Chevy Chase's satirical portrait of Ford as a bumbling loser affected the American imagination. "People remember Gerald Ford through the prism of Chevy Chase. Ford was among our most athletic presidents, and he had a wide-ranging knowledge of public-policy issues. But because of 'SNL,' many came to think of him as a buffoon." Um, maybe they think of him as a buffoon because he pardoned Nixon, and hired both Donald Rumsfeld and Dick Cheney as his Chiefs of Staff, not because Chevy Chase played him as someone who fell down a lot.

Anyway! Another professorial pundit, Lauren Feldman of American University, tells UPI that even if Palin does appear on SNL as has been rumored, it probably wouldn't help her political career. "Appearances on late-night comedy shows are useful for candidates as a means to project their non-political personas, to make them seem more 'human' and in-touch with voters. Palin is not necessarily lacking in these areas," Feldman says. "She would benefit more from a strong, substantive performance in a more serious setting."

Tina Fey's impressions may have "swift-butted" Palin's career, but they've been gangbusters for Fey's public profile. The New York Times wonders why the season premiere of Fey's 30 Rock is being held until October 30th, and NBC Entertainment co-chair Ben Silverman says, “If we knew [when we were planning the network schedule] what we know today about how hot Tina was going to be, would we do it differently? Maybe." See we thought Sarah Palin wasn't good for anything, but she might have inadvertently saved the critically acclaimed 30 Rock from the ratings basement.

Palin Falls Prey To Fey [NY Post]
Tina Fey's Impersonations May Have Impact [UPI]
It’s Easy To Find Tina Fey On TV, But Not Her Show [NY Times]

Palin Booed in Philadelphia Before Flyers-Rangers Game [Los Angeles Times]
Despite Reports, Sarah Palin Hasn't Been Booked On SNL [The Morning Delivery]

If you are outside of the US, you may be able to view the clip here.

And on this note of hilarity, I am going to break for a few hours. I will be back with an open thread for you Mad Men fans. If you can't stay up to watch the show tonight, be sure to check back tomorrow to read Tracie's weekly Mad Men recap. Thanks for a lovely weekend!

Sarah Palin: If She's Not Ready To Debate Can She Be Ready To Lead?

• Brad Pitt has donated $100,000 to the campaign to defeat Proposition 8, the California ballot initiative that would ban same-sex marriage in the state. In a statement, he says: "Because no one has the right to deny another their life even though they disagree with it, because everyone has the right to live the life they so desire if it doesn't harm another and because discrimination has no place in America, my vote will be for equality and against Proposition 8." [Variety]
• Hilary Swank is recovering from a "minor" medical procedure; she had a "growth" removed and is totally fine. Except the word "growth" is sorta gross. [ET]
• Amy Poehler is sad about leaving SNL: "I'm on the verge of tears every minute. The cast and writers there are so dear, dear to me. I can't quite imagine not doing it. From now until my due date, we have about six shows and three election specials. I'm so, so sad about leaving." [USA Today]
• Oprah's BFF Gayle King spills on O's 30 Rock stint! "It is a hoot," Gayle tells New York magazine. "It was taped last Saturday. Let me tell you, Tina Fey and Oprah Winfrey together is magic. Oprah and Tina together: Hilarious. H-I-L-A-A-A-R-I-O-U-S." [NY Mag]

• So you know how Lindsay Lohan is all prO-bama, and the Obama camp is like, "Thanks, but no thanks"? Michael Lohan says: "Everyone is entitled to an opinion and so is Obama and his staff. Then again, you know what they say about opinions. Unfortunately, for them, to make such a comment about my daughter was a big mistake… Look at Angelina Jolie and the wonderful things she has done in her life, and now watch how Lindsay does the same." Wait, does this mean that LL is going to adopt a Vietnamese baby? [TMZ]
• Speaking of Lindsay, does she have a crush on Victoria Beckham? At the premiere of Ugly Betty, she was heard saying: "I love her hair. She looks really hot at the moment. It reminds me of Sam." [ONTD]
• Superclassy Joe Francis says: "Lindsay's straight. I think Sam has taken ownership of Lindsay. I think if Sam were to let Lindsay go even that much; Lindsay would revert back to being straight." [E!]
• Will Smith was asked if he was a Scientologist. He replied: "I am not." There you have it! [Perez Hilton]
• Juliette Lewis says Tom Cruise is not the representation of all things Scientology. "I feel so bad for him, because that's the responsibility that's put on him." She also says Scientology is not what you think it is: "It's just really practical, applied religious philosophy. And you'll get lost in the media with these fantastic, fantastical - is that a word? - stories of, like, aliens and, you know, gay cover-ups … the rumours, they're astonishing. And they would be funny, if they weren't so hurtful." [Perez Hilton]
• Here's video of Madonna falling on stage in concert while playing guitar and grinding, "just for the lulz." [ONTD]
• By the by, in Madonna's film, her directorial debut called Filth And Wisdom, a pivotal scene involves a stripper dancing to Britney Spears' "Baby One More Time." [Yahoo News]
• Jennifer Aniston is in Mexico with a mystery man. [The Sun]
• R. Kelly was interviewed for the first time since being acquitted of child pornography charges. When asked if he liked teenage girls, Kelly replied: "When you say teenage, how — how old are we talkin' ... 19? I have some 19-year-old friends. But I don't like anybody illegal, if that's what we're talking about, underage." [Yahoo News]
• Rose McGowan said that she would have joined the Irish Republican Army if she'd lived in Belfast during the conflicts there; producers of her film, Fifty Dead Men Walking have issued a statement that goes like this: "Ms. McGowan's views were private ones, and as such they greatly saddened the film's producers." [Hollywood Reporter]
• Elizabeth Hurley is now like the Jimmy Dean of England and sells pork for sausage and bacon. No, really. [The Sun]
• Jason Wahler's trial is set for November 3; he's accused of roughing up a tow-truck driver. There are also allegations that he shouted racial slurs at the plaintiff, who is black. [E!]
• Gary Coleman has been charged with misdemeanor reckless driving and disorderly conduct after an incident at a bowling alley in Utah. A fan tried to take Gary's picture with a cell phone camera; Gary allegedly attacked him and ran over him with his truck. [E!]
• Actor Thomas Jane (seen in The Punisher, married to Patricia Arquette) has pleaded no contest to drunken driving after doing 120 mph in a Maserati. He's been sentenced to to a year of probation, $1,700 in fines and alcohol abuse classes. Didn't the Medium see this coming? [Yahoo News]
• Those Jerry Seinfeld/Bill Gates ads are ending. Try to act interested. [LA Times]
• John Cleese is making like his James Bond alter ego Q and hosting a new gadget show in the UK. [The Sun]
• Ranae Shrider, aka Verne "Mini-Me" Troyer's ex-girlfriend, says she has no idea who is behind the overseas website that released a sex tape of Ranae and Verne. "I actually found out about the website when a friend of mine from college called and asked, 'Did you know you can have sex with Mini-Me for $9.95?'" Shrider says. [AVN]
• Denzel Washington, Jackie Joyner-Kersee, Martin Sheen, Wesley Clark and Shaquille O'Neal, who attended the Boys & Girls Clubs of America as children, have lent their childhood photos to the organization for a national advertising campaign. Denzel was adorbs. [AP]
• Redmond O'Neal's drug sponsor is Ashley Hamilton. The guy who was married to Shannen Doherty. His mom is Alana Stewart, Farrah Fawcett's best friend. And Farrah is Redmond's mom. Got it? [Janet Charlton's Hollywood]
• The Foo Fighters: On a long break. [Perez Hilton]
• Dita Von Teese claims she has never been an exhibitionist. "I wouldn't be caught dead baring my stomach," she says. "To me, baring my stomach during the day is just wrong. Remember that fashion for wearing super-low cut jeans? I tried a pair on once as a joke. It looked disgusting — I mean pornographic." [Sydney Morning Herald]
• Justin Timberlake isn't working on an album because he has fashion and golf to think about. [USA Today]
• Despite earlier reports that he was gonna get blown up or something, an expert says there is no credible terror threat against Paul McCartney regarding his upcoming gig in Israel. Shalom! [UPI]
• Keira Knightley to star in a modern love story and not a period piece! [Variety]
• "They're a bunch of pasty white, completely non-rock and roll, Christian… I can't stand that shit! I don't even know what they sound like." — Courtney Love on The Jonas Brothers. [MSNBC]
• "Everything that has happened to me, good and bad, I feel has happened for a reason. I've been made stronger from the good stuff and much, much stronger from the bad stuff." — Anne Hathaway. [People]
• "All kinds of Christians are getting mad about my Sarah Palin comments, and it is pissing me off […] If you truly believed in Jesus, you would try to be like him and love us, fags and dykes and feminists all. God bless you, even you. You fucking fuckers." — Margaret Cho. [Perez Hilton]

• Amy Poehler is leaving Saturday Night Live! She'll step away after the November election to give birth to her first child, and she won't be coming back. "It's gonna be really hard — Boyz II Men hard — to say goodbye to yesterday," she says. "But like any good drug, you need to know when to put it down." Amy will still be on TV, though: She's getting her own NBC series from the producers of The Office. [LA Times]
• RIP TRL! After ten years, Total Request Live will end its run on MTV. All kinds of stars stopped by the studios promote their projects, from Britney Spears to *NSync to Eminem. Remember when Mariah had her meltdown? It's the end of an era. [AP]
• Katie Couric has landed an interview with Sarah Palin. The CBS anchor will travel with the Governor next week. Will the ladies go on a moose hunt? [Page Six]
• Amy Winehouse posted pictures of Blake Incarcerated exposing his manhood on her Facebook profile. (Click to see a censored version.) In other news, Blake would rather stay in prison than accept early release where he has to live with his mum and wear an electronic monitoring device because he doesn't want to go somewhere where he can't be with Amy. [The Sun]

• Oh dear, it seems that Blake Incarcerated has failed a drug test and will spend Christmas in jail. Amy is upset she'll be spending New Year's Eve alone. She must feel like she's fighting some unholy war. [ONTD]
• Christina Applegate went back to work on the set of Samantha Who? yesterday, after taking time out for a double mastectomy in July. She'll undergo reconstructive surgery in the next few months. [E!]
• Nikki Blonksky sat down with Entertainment Tonight in her first interview since the incident in a Turks and Caicos airport which lead to her — and her father — being arrested. "You never expect things like this in your life, but you take life one day at a time, and you deal with situations," Nikki says. [ET]
• Nikki Blonsky also says nice things about Zac Efron: "I love him with every inch of my body and soul. He has been an amazing support system." [Just Jared]
• Mischa Barton and Josh Hartnett partied in London together. They left a club and went to his hotel; she was seen leaving an hour later. Is it on? [This Is London]
• Kevin Federline skipped his sons' birthday party to get wasted in Las Vegas. [MSNBC]
• Zahara Jolie-Pitt is three years old, but she already has a job lined up: When she's older, she can work at the clinic her parents have established in Ethiopia for children with AIDS and tuberculosis. [Star]
• Leonardo DiCaprio and Bar Rafaeli's off-again/on-again relationship is currently off. Stay tuned. [Rush & Molloy]
• Mariah Carey doesn't pick up her dog doo. [Page Six]
• Don't look for any more singles from Mariah Carey's album. [Perez Hilton]
• Lily Allen's new album comes out in February and is basically done, though she's adding some things. She explains: "I’m working on some extra stuff in the studio at the moment, it seems making an album isn't enough these days, some websites (not naming any!) won’t put an album on their front page unless you give them exclusive tracks, not that I’m complaining." Then she goes on to complain: "I always thought an album was a body of work in itself. you take it or leave it. You wouldn't say to a painter 'yeah I love the naked ladies, but would you mind painting their hair blonde instead of brown, and making their t*ts a bit bigger?' or 'the trees are really pretty, a few more leaves perhaps?' Maybe you would actually, ha ha." [Mirror]
• Tom Hanks: Being honored by the Film Society of Lincoln Center. [USA Today]
• Pat O'Brien of The Insider cares about poor people, claims he has "raged against the machine" and says we can change the world. [Page Six]
• Veronica Webb was replaced by Gretta Monahan on Tim Gunn's Guide To Style, but was still forced to sit next to her at a party. The cruelty! [Page Six]
• Guy Ritchie says a quickie is the best type of sex. Also, when asked why his films rarely have actresses in them, he said, "That's because I don't understand women." [The Sun]
• Benicio Del Toro and Steven Soderbergh: Seen partying in Toronto, getting lap dances and letting the ladies pour vodka shots into their mouths. Che it ain't so. [Page Six]
• Uh-oh, Kate Moss's daughter likes the way gas smells, so Kate leaves the car door open when she fills up at the petrol station. Does snorting chemicals run in the family? [The Sun]
• Jack White is not happy that Coca-Cola is using a song he wrote for the James Bond film Quantum of Solace. Although! Jack White did once write a song for Coke. Just not this song. [AdFreak]
• Ew, Aubry O'Day seen making out with Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis. [Page Six]
• Miley Cyrus's new guy is a model and aspiring country singer snamed Justin Gaston. Her rep says he is a "friend from Nashville." The two went to church together on Sunday. Jesus, talk about a clean teen. [People]
• Here's an interview with Michael Emerson, who plays Benjamin Linus on Lost. He says: "I learned the story at the same rate the audience was learning it. I didn’t know where it was going… But I've gotten used to it. Now, not knowing is part of the fun." [LA Times]
• Snoop Dogg, Rihanna and Chris Brown will attend the Melbourne Cup. Just a short while ago, it was unclear whether Snoop would be allowed into Australia; now he'll be in some kind of VIP booth at the horse race. Trifecta like it's hot. [News.com.au]
• The West Hollywood Gay and Lesbian Alliance are calling the British comedy series Little Britain USA "offensive" and "obnoxious." Isn't it supposed to be? [ONTD]
• Cate Blanchett and Philip Seymour Hoffman are working on a project to promote collaboration between theater companies in London, New York and Sydney, Australia. Blanchett's husband is a playwright; Hoffman is directing his work. [AP]
• Megan Fox is on the cover of GQ running her tongue across her teeth and wearing a bikini. She's also on the cover of Maxim, but the magazine bought old pix and did a story without her cooperation. [People]
• Noel Gallagher plans to team up with Russell Brand to create TV shows. Maybe even a sitcom. Be afraid. [The Sun]
• Saturday, Susie Essman of Curb Your Enthusiasm married her boyfriend of five years, a real estate broker named Jim Harder. Congrats! She says: "He didn’t even have HBO, or cable for that matter, and maybe that was a good thing because if he had ever seen me play Susie Greene, he probably would have run for the hills." [People]
• Dane Cook's made three shitty movies. Will My Best Friend's Girl be different? [AP]
• Um, a remake of Children Of The Corn. For the SciFi Channel. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Any CSI: NY fans out there? How do you feel about the fact that Rumer Willis will be on a November 19th episode? [EW]
• "No one can replace Richard Wright — he was my musical partner and my friend. He was gentle, unassuming and private but his soulful voice and playing were vital, magical components of our most recognised Pink Floyd sound." — Pink Floyd guitarist David Gilmour. [BBC News]
• "(David) wasn’t very well endowed, because he was fighting Goliath. There was very much that effect (for me). You tighten up like a hamster." — Daniel Radcliffe, on "shrinkage" due to stage fright while appearing nude in Equus on Broadway. [MSNBC, Daily Express]