• October 4-11 is Seniors Week in Australia. To celebrate, brothels aligned with Australian Adult Entertainment will offer discounted services to anyone with a seniors' discount card. Wonder if they also offer an early bird special. • According to new research, although women think they don't sleep as well as men, we actually get more sleep on average and are more likely to sleep through the night. They also found that women tend to require more sleep than men. •  A recent study found that breast milk changes in composition throughout the day, and milk collected at night has a higher concentration of sleep-inducing nucleotides. "This made us realize that milk induces sleep in babies," said the lead researcher on the team. • A 21-year-old girl from India disarmed a terrorist leader who had broken into her family's farm house and demanded food and beds for his group of Pakistani militants. After the man attacked her father, she ran out from her hiding place and hit him with an axe, grabbed his AK47 and shot him dead. • Afghanistan is likely to pass the Elimination of Violence Against Women Act, which will allow wives to prosecute their husbands for abuse. But courts hold little power in Afghanistan, and the bill has already been weakened by police and others who insisted its punishments for men be lessened. • John McCain says he's looking forward to reading the part of Sarah Palin's life story where "her selection put us ahead in the polls," but not the part about "disagreements that took place within the campaign." • A new female condom, which costs 30% less than previous versions, will hit Washington-area CVS stores in December. • Elizabeth Smart says her kidnapper Brian David Mitchell raped her daily, and that he was "evil, wicked, manipulative, stinky, slimy, selfish, not spiritual, not religious, not close to God." • Harlan Drake, alleged killer of anti-abortion protester James Pouillon, has been judged incompetent to stand trial, but a judge says that he will likely be competent if he completes treatment. • The person responsible for a Facebook poll asking "should Obama be killed?" turns out to be a child — no charges will be filed against him or his parents. • Women age 35-49 download and listen to more music than any other group, according to new data. Women of all ages were found to visit music websites more often than men. • 

One study looked at women who were stably married, stably single, or gained or lost a partner during an eight-year period. The always-married women had the best sleep, followed by those who gained a partner. Those who lost a partner had the worst sleep. Another study found that while 26% of those earning $10,000 a year or less had sleep problems, only 8% of those earning more than $75,000 did. A study author speculated that poor sleep among lower income people might have to do with "illness, fewer support systems, depression, anxiety, dissatisfaction, lower quality of life," as well as "external factors" like "demanding work schedules, rotating shifts, family demands, limited access to healthcare, and unemployment."

A third study found that poor relationship quality resulted in worse sleep, and vice versa. A study author said,

When we look at the data on a day-by-day basis, there seems to be a vicious cycle in which sleep affects next day relationship functioning, and relationship functioning affects the subsequent night's sleep. In this cycle, conflict with one's partner during the day leads to worse sleep that night, which leads to more conflict the following day. [...] the woman's perception of the relationship seems particularly important, as it impacts both her own and her partner's subjective sleep quality that night.

The study author recommends never going to bed mad, or, you know, just having huge amounts of money.

Stable Marriage Is Linked With Better Sleep In Women [EurekAlert]
Socioeconomic Status, Gender And Marital Status Influence Sleep Disturbances [EurekAlert]
Poor Sleep Is Associated With Lower Relationship Satisfaction In Both Women And Men [EurekAlert]

Clune trots out the old chestnut that women are too tired to bone after working, grocery shopping, and taking care of the kids. She also complains that, "these days women are expected not only to be the perfect wife, mother and career woman but also a naughty nymph at bedtime." But the only solution she offers is one already espoused at length by Caitlin Flanagan: "Just Do It." Though she jokingly blames her triplets on "Just Doing It," Clune seems to agree that "sex is just like jogging - you don't always fancy the idea of it, but once you start you wonder why you don't do it more often." True enough — but why do the legion of columns about busy women's low sex drive offer lying back and thinking of England as the only real fix for the problem?

Clune does name-check the recession ("money worries, redundancy and falling house prices aren't the best aphrodisiacs") — but she doesn't make the obvious connection that people's work lives are ruining both sex and sleep. Other writers on this issue — Ayelet Waldman among them — have suggested that men should shoulder more of the housework to get their wives in the mood. Equality in the home is a great idea, and, which really practiced, has probably sexed up many a celibate marriage. But individual men doing more laundry is no substitute for an examination of capitalism's demands on families. We live in a world where both parents must often work to support their kids, where maternity and paternity leave are substandard, where child care is expensive, and where women and men both suffer in the workplace when they put their families first. And the recession has not changed the mentality that the best employee — single, childless, partnered, or parenting — is one who always puts his or her personal life second. Until these things change, people will always have to make the sad choice between sex and sleep.

At least, though, the Brits surveyed had a choice. A new Australian film, My Year Without Sex, tells the story of Natalie, who suffers a brain aneurysm and is told to forgo sex or a year to avoid triggering another one. The movie shows not just how Natalie and Ross navigate Natalie's sexless year, but also how they raise their two children and interact with a richer family "who spend their time making money, arguing and shopping." Reviewer Paul Byrnes says My Year Without Sex gives viewers "a strong sense that raising a family now comes with unforeseen difficulties" and "a year without sex is actually one of the lesser challenges that [the director] tackles." Nonetheless, Natalie's plight should serve as a reminder to people prevented from screwing by the more common libido-killers of long hours and housework — sex, and a fulfilling personal life in general, is worth fighting for.

8 out of 10 Brits prefer sleep to sex [GMTV]
Is sleep the new sex? Yes! Yes! Yezzzzzz [Daily Mail]
My Year Without Sex [Sydney Morning Herald]
"Year Without Sex" proves to be time well spent [Reuters]

So thanks for another lovely weekend, and happy holidays! And if this is too cute for you, there's always this.
Dogs Unwrapping Presents [CuteOverload]
Sleepy Puppy[CuteThingsFallingAsleep]

And thanks to Haguenite for sending in the Bailey clip!

But after years of that chronic sleep deprivation we all suffer, Ruth decides to deal with things the natural way; by getting a new bed.

She looks at something called a "split king" — like a king bed, but with two twin sides. Her husband doesn't want to get it. Then...I don't think she ends up getting the bed. I didn't really finish the story because I'm kind of sleep-deprived. Because I've been sleeping next to someone? Hah, I wish; fuck you guys.

On a side note: does anyone drool? I have a drooling problem. Never been a snorer, just a drooler...

While You Weren't Sleeping [Elle]

As most moms know, "A baby's primary caregiver loses up to 700 hours of sleep in the first year," reports Liz Szabo for USA Today. Sleep deprivation strains marriages and leads to memory loss and depression. (Maybe even something called "momnesia".) And a sleepy mother can put lives in danger if she gets behind the wheel.

But what if, like Ms. Beck, you've been sleep-deprived for decades? It's called chronic sleep deficit. Dr. Czeisler says if you've only been getting four or five hours of sleep a night, you build up the same level of dysfunction in one week as someone who's been awake for 24 hours. Sounds terrible, like being a zombie. Been there! But just like some people weren't meant to be ballerinas, is it possible that some people aren't cut out for the modern clock? The new statistics about Americans being sleepier than ever are frightening: 36% have nodded off or fallen asleep while driving; 32% were drowsy while driving at least one or two times a month; and 26% drive drowsy during the workday. How can we get more sleep? What evolutionary gain is there to getting up at the crack of dawn? Instead of forcing night owls to get up at 6 a.m., how about a workday that beings at noon? Why keep punishing night owls?

Learning to Live Like An Early Bird [WSJ]
Parents With Babies Need Time To Reset Inner Clock [USA Today]
Babies Can Cause 'Momnesia' [USA Today]
Americans Sleepier Than Ever [U.S. News & World Report]

All prices are for queen-sized items.



This ensemble from Pottery Barn has bright colors, but might be a wee too busy.

Terra bed, $1,499; PB Classic Stripe bedding, $149; Nora Floral duvet cover, $99; sham , $25. Pottery Barn.

Grade: 3 sheep

Not exactly the hippest bed, but it looks really comfy.

Seagrass headboard, $399; Madison Floral duvet, $99, allover flower sham, $29; single-flower sham, $29. Pottery Barn.

Grade: 2 sheep

Crappy colors, hard-looking bed. Insomnia lurks!

Montego bed, $1,349; Duncan Stripe bedding, $139; pick-stitch quilt, $179. Pottery Barn.

Grade: 4 sheep

This isn't really part of the game, it's just so cute and practical.

Dog bed cubby entryway, $699. Pottery Barn.

This "Eco-Chic" bedding is organic, but the bed itself is made from mahogany. Deforestation dreams? Still, the combo of soothing colors and muted prints is relaxing.

Canopy bed, $1,199; organic cotton & Overlapping Leaves bedding, $119-$139. Pottery Barn.

Grade: 1 sheep

In your past life, you were a poet in Paris. You were ink-stained and impish and loads of fun at parties, with your smoldering dark eyes and simmering wit. You slept here.

Chinoiserie duvet cover, $198; shams, $68 for 2; bedskirt, $88. Anthropologie.

Grade: 1 sheep

Love this bedding. It brings to mind the kind of girl who plays guitar, rescues animals, has a smattering of stamps in her passport and speaks a dead language. She'll break your heart and look hot while walking out the door.

Contsatinople bedding: Quilt, $248; shams, $88 for 2; bedskirt, $89. Anthropologie.

Grade: 1 sheep

This is not for sleep. This is for two words: Outdoor shagging.

Nightingale headboard, $798; Cirrus duvet cover, $198; shams, $68 for 2; bedskirt, $88. Anthropologie.

Grade: 4 sheep

Even though the bed seems designed for ankle-bruising, the appeal is in the dynamics between soft and hard; square and round.

Low platform bed, $569; Dynasty Dot duvet cover, $149; shams $39 for set of 2; embroidered butterfly pillow, $24. West Elm.

Grade: 2 sheep

It's tough to do retro-hippie exotic psuedo-ethnic without conjuring something that threatens to reek of patchouli. This succeeds: Dreams are sure to be filled with lush roses and verdant oases.

Wood bed frame, $279; Morocco headboard, $359; stitched paisley quilt, $149; shams, $39 for set of 2. West Elm.

Grade: 1 sheep

Yes. This is it. Soft, inviting, clean, crisp, pillowy, plush. Yes, yes, yes. Mmmm.

Random-weave headboard, $379; organic cotton sheet set, $89; organic cotton pleated duvet, $99; shams, $29 for 2; organic pillow cover, $29; organic knit throw, $49; sheepskin rug, $149. West Elm.

Grade: Zzzzz.



[Pottery Barn ]

[Anthropologie]

[West Elm]




Related: Things I've Bought That I Love [Mindy Kaling's Blog]

Earlier: Boston Proper: When You Don't Actually Have A Yacht In The Mediterranean But Wish You Did

Anthropologie "Giving": We Love To Hate & Hate To Love It

Please Do Not Look The Anthropologie Model In The Eye

• Cutest discovery evs?? A new population of these owl-looking motherfuckers called De Brazza's monkeys — thought to be near extinction — were found in Kenya. Look at that face! Don't you kind of want one? [National Geographic]
  
• Britney, you best be letting Sean and Jayden get some shut-eye. A new study shows that lack of sleep may lead to obesity in children. [CBS News]
  
• Addicted to drugs? Try battling your crack cravings through virtual reality. According to a Duke U. professor, "What we're trying to do is take people into a virtual crack-related neighborhood or crack-related setting and have them experience cravings, just like they would in the real world." [ABC News]

• From the department of Obvious Studies: "The research is clear that divorce with conflict is unquestionably bad for the kids." [MSNBC]
• Everyone deals with grief differently, says new research. "Some people suffer interminable grief, and others show no distress at all." [Psychology Today]
• Cougars on the prowl can get Gardasil soon! According to the HPV vaccine manufacturer Merck, the company may soon approve Gardasil for women aged 26-45. The vaccine is currently only available for females ages 9-26. [MSNBC]

According to a study reported in The Independent, people often behave in ways that are out of character while asleep. Dr. Simon Williams of the University of Warwick divides sleepers into eight categories: Socially attentive, intolerant, selfish, anarchic, snoozers, nappers, feigners and deviants. The socially attentive are easily roused; intolerant and selfish sleepers make their sleep a priority over their significant others', and can be snorers and sleepwalkers as well. Snoozers are the kind of people who can sleep on a train without missing their stop; nappers are gaining acceptance; feigners pretend to be asleep (WTF?) and deviants include people who make unconscious nighttime trips to the refrigerator. The study adds, "Murders have been committed by people while asleep." On someone who was snoring, perhaps?

It's kind of upsetting that psychologist Wendy Troxel finds that only men benefit from settling down, saying, "My research shows that married men are much happier and healthier than unmarried men. The findings are much less consistent with women." But the most annoying part about all these studies is that they seem to agree on one thing: Women are usually lighter sleepers, possibly because, as researchers suggest, they "historically have been the ones caring for infants." So, even though we don't have any kids, when our neighbor comes home wasted and stumbles up the stairs, we have no choice but to lie there and listen. Yawn.

Men Sleep Best Beside Mate; Women Sleep Worse [MSNBC]
Disturbed Sleep Linked To Poorer Daytime Function In Older Women [Science Daily]
You Are How You Sleep: What 40 Winks Can Reveal About You (Or Your Partner) [The Independent]

• Our favorite tennis-playing Williams sister, Serena, opened a can of major whupass at Wimbledon earlier today, despite a strained calf muscle. She'll go after Justine Henin in the quarterfinals next. [SportsIllustrated]
  
• Forget Alli. Scientists may have found a natural chemical — "liposuction in a bottle!" — that prevents the formation of fat. [ABCNews]
  
• This is just the news we needed to hear: It's shared housework, not kids, that help makes a relationship work. [DailyMail]
  
• Trying not to get pregnant? Good for you! Just one tip: You'll increase your changes of remaining happily barren if you really stress yourself out. [BBC]

• Breastfeeding their children may make some women feel superior, but it's no guarantee that their kids won't grow up fat and unhappy. [Yahoo]
• Women are less likely than men to get a good night's sleep, suffer moodswings. Tell us something we don't know already? [DailyMail]

• The Loch Ness monster: Still alive and on high-def! [CNN]
  
• Harry Potter is getting his own theme park. [USAToday]
  
• Yawn. Americans aren't getting enough sleep. [WSJ]
  
• More people who believe women have to be protected from birth control pills. [Salon]
  
• How's this for irony: the father in law of the tuberculosis patient that everyone's up in arms about is a disease researcher. [Guardian]
  
• White male Christians: Going extinct! [CrooksAndLiars]
  
• Blue whales: Not going extinct! [BBC]
  
• 3 U.S. soldiers declared dead today. [DOD]