Jezebel: sibling survivalry

Erica Jong's Sister: "Fear of Flying Has Been A Thorn In My Flesh For Thirty-Five Years"

Jessica — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 15:00:00 EDT

Last week, in honor of the 35th anniversary of the publication of Fear of Flying and the acquisition of Erica Jong's papers by Columbia University, the author herself gave a talk about Flying's role in the feminist pantheon. Rebecca Traister of Salon thinks of Flying more as a sex book than as a feminist book (Jong on her legacy: "I used to worry that they would put zipless fuck on my tombstone."). And though Jong's book is frankly sexual — "his curled pink penis which tasted faintly of urine and refused to stand up in my mouth" — it's also very, very autobiographical, as Jong's irate sister pointed out in the middle the lecture. According to the New Yorker's Rebecca Mead, Jong's sister, Suzanna Daou, stood up and said, "I love my sister very much, but Fear of Flying has been a thorn in my flesh for thirty-five years."

Erica used me, and she used my husband, who was a very kind man, a very handsome man. I just felt I had to do it. It was not a novel; it was a memoir, but it was a memoir something like James Frey's memoir. A lot of nastiness went into that book. But I forgive her for everything, except writing that my husband crawled into her bed, which he didn't, and asked her to perform fellatio, which he didn't.

Of her outburst, Suzanna tells Mead, "I gave myself permission to be a bitch... God forgive me, I didn't mean to do it. But I am at peace." In response, Jong called her sister "insane," and claims, "I thought I was writing a mock memoir, à la Moll Flanders or Robinson Crusoe. I never thought anyone would take it literally, especially a member of my very intelligent family."

However, as the New Yorker points out, Jong used specific details of her sister's life to pad out Flying. But Suzanna's outburst does raise an interesting question about memoir-ish writing in general: is it worth the price of hurting loved ones feelings to create an arguable masterpiece? In this world of TMI and blogging every conquest and conflict, are there too many personal casualties? Isn't it anti-feminist to sell your sister down the river to further your own success? Or is this just a case of sisterly jealousy gone awry?

What Makes A Feminist Book A Classic? [Salon]
Still Flying [New Yorker]
Fear Of Flying [Amazon]

The Younger Kardashian Sisters Are In-House Underminers

Anna — Mon, 10 Mar 2008 19:00:00 EDT

Last night, in honor of the temporarily-departed Tracie "Slut Machine" Egan, I checked out the season premiere of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. And I was kinda fascinated! The storyline was simple: Older sister Kourtney was suffering through a relationship blip with her boyfriend Scott, and her younger sisters, Kim and Khloe, were partly to blame. The two had gone through Scott's cellphone text messages looking for dirt, and, once they found it, were less than sympathetic to their older sister's conflicting emotions about her (maybe) cheating boyfriend. Khloe in particular, reminded me of the sort of underminer-y "best" friend who creates conflict and then tries to control the narrative once she's let the cat out of the bag, so to speak. By the end of the show, Scott and Kourtney had made up, but not before Khloe got a few words in edgewise. Clip above.

'Glamour' Explains How To Beat Cancer, AND Your Dead Big Sister

Moe — Thu, 06 Sep 2007 13:45:20 EDT

Thanks to Fashion Week we got our October Glamour way early, and not a moment too soon, we realized yesterday when we flipped to "A Story That Could Save Your Life" on page 318. It's about two sisters who both got breast cancer! One died; the other lived. How'd she do it? By incessantly harking back on every mistake her sister had made that led her down the dark destructive metastic spiral towards DEATH, and making sure she outdid her every step of the way!

"At every step of treatment, I wanted to know that I'd acted more quickly than Norma had," Apryl says..."I remember Norma was always reacting to what the cancer did to her... I was really obsessed with being in control of it.

Apryl's secrets to beating cancer? A preventative double mastectomy and a hysterectomy, a positive attitude, and access to ten years' worth of medical advancements that hadn't occurred when her sister was dying! Little sisters are so smart! Unlike little brothers, who when their brothers find lumps on their manboobs years after their older brothers come down with breast cancer, just think, "What are the odds?"

No, really, that's also a true story. See? Just when the human condition starts to really depress you, its absurdity gives you a good reason to laugh. Stay positive! It's Fashion Week, not Fashion Year

Two Sisters With Breast Cancer. One Made It. One Didn't. [Glamour]
Breast Cancer Strikes Brothers [The Sun]

Older Sisters Are All A Bunch Of Hilarious Sadists

Anna — Thu, 23 Aug 2007 17:30:00 EDT

Yesterday, we did a throwaway post on the evil that older sisters do. (At left: Dodai and her Mini-Me. By the way, that picture from yesterday? That was me. All us black girls don't look alike, you know!) Anyway, yesterday's post was inspired by a very sad story out of Britain about a 6-year-old girl who shot her 3-year-old sister in the head with an air pellet gun (the girl lived, but the pellet is lodged in her brain), a story that brought up all sorts of guilt and shame over the abuse we'd once heaped on our baby sisters. But the anecdotes shared by you Jezebel commenters? They really cheered us up! In fact, they kept us laughing late well into the night. (An instant message from Jennifer to myself at 11:34pm read simply: "HAHAHHAHAHAHA".) So in honor, we've decided to share some of your best and most badass beat-down stories. After the jump, readers recount tales involving bed-wetting, one-sided pillow fights, and general psychological torture.

LolKate :

I convinced my little sister that the TV remote controlled her as well as the TV. I would hit mute and then pretend I couldn't hear her, no matter how loud she yelled. She lived in fear of the power button.

Wigglepuppy:

I used to hide under my sister's bed and make scary wild animal noises until she woke up, started crying and dropped her bottle. I would then hide under my own bed, drink the bottle and tell myself over and over "I'm the baby". Oh, and there was also the time that I knocked over the shopping cart she was in, which led to six stitches in her chin. and that time I told her third grade class that she still wet the bed...hard to believe that she still speaks to me...

HamburgerHotDog:

I was in charge of waking my sister up in the morning so I'd go in her room, turn on all the lights, open the windows (this is in Minnesota in the dead of winter), steal her blankets and pillow, hit her a few times with the pillow, then leave the room.

TheGreatLadies:

I told my sister we were running away. We both packed our bags and tromped down the sidewalk at dusk. I told her to wait there—I'd forgotten something. I then went inside and locked the door behind me. She stood on the front porch crying.

Baa:

I used to fling my little sister around in the johnny jump up contraption my parents had hanging in the kitchen doorway. One day she lost her temper, and in all of her two-year-old fury told me to (and I quote) "blow it out my ass". My mom said she couldn't yell at my sister because she was laughing so hard.

And, just to put things in perspective, here's a touching tale from Annie Get Your Gun:

What makes it worse, though, is how adoring little sisters are. Mine was ALWAYS trying to think of ways to win my affection. And I was SO ignorant of it. I still have a note that she wrote to me when she gave me a gift "Dear Annie, this is a shirt for you on this day and you will like it very much i hope ok thanks." So sweet, I still get weepy over it.

Us too. Us. Too.

Earlier: An Open Apology To Our Younger Sisters
Related: Air Pellet Lodged In Girl's Brain [Reuters]

An Open Apology To Our Younger Sisters

Anna — Wed, 22 Aug 2007 15:00:00 EDT

Dear Meredith, Jillian, Christina, and Ann: We did a lot of bad things to you when we were kids. We broke your arms; intimated you had lead poisioning; outright ignored you; and punched you in the back of the head when you were asleep in a grimy NYC hotel room because it was dark, mom was gone, and we were scared to be the only ones awake. We're sorry. And in light of this report out of Britain, we are especially sorry. That is all.

Air Pellet Lodged In Girl's Brain [BBC]