Jezebel: shut up

Mayim Bialik Did Not Exactly Adore Her WNTW Outfit

Sadie — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 18:00:00 EDT

Two kids and a neuroscience doctorate down, the actress formerly known as Blossom Russo has decided to get back into acting. Obviously, as mentioned by Hortense, she called Clinton and Stacy. There was just one problem:

Writes Bialik in Tablet,

The WNTW producers asked if I have any clothing restrictions. Deep breath. "I don't wear pants," I told them. "I prefer skirts." You see, I am what I guess you'd call a Conservadox Jew. I started embracing certain aspects of Jewish modesty, or tzniut, before my second son was born, and although I know many Orthodox women who don't observe tzniut, the boundaries and framework of privacy it provides appealed to me.

Although Bialik isn't that strict - she doesn't, for instance, refuse to wear 3/4 sleeves - her demands do put a bit of a kink in WNTW's style. It's a smart, well-written piece, but there are two kind of hilarous parts. I think - but am not positive - that the following is deliberately tongue-in-cheek.

Growing up, I lived a pretty normal life; I had my own prime-time network TV show from the ages of 14 to 19, which meant my physical appearance and clothing choices were dissected on a weekly basis in gossip magazines and on television.

But this, I'm sure, isn't: "During the days of the sheva brachot, the seven traditional feasts celebrated in the days after the chuppah ceremony, I tentatively covered my head with scarves and crocheted hats." Tentatively? Blossom lived in hats! Hell, she made them a thing! I had a sunflower hat!

Anyway, one has to wonder if WNTW was the only way she could smarten up her act; she's not the first actor, after all, who's used it as an optimistic bit of new-push PR. But hell, we'd do the show if it meant we could hang out with Clinton and Stacey! And we wouldn't even give them any problems about wearing the satin reveal dress, or the A-line skirt, or the nipped-in jacket that shows off the waist and the girls! Indeed, it's always seemed a bit irrational for those who knowingly agree to the makeovers - as opposed to those intransigent types humiliated into it by secret footage - to give the team a lot of problems. But in the case of religious objections? It doesn't seem like anything the dynamic duo couldn't surmount.

So, how'd it go? Well:

I got wonderful new clothes, jewelry, and vegan shoes (one of my other preferences). When we filmed me revealing the final outfits they picked, I gently pointed out that skirts above the knee are not something I'd wear, and that I wouldn't wear sleeveless shirts or dresses without something to cover my arms once I left the set. When the show aired, I saw that my qualifications and explanations did not survive the cutting room...I don't wish to claim that there is an "immodest agenda" on WNTW. It's a show for the average American, who is most likely not Jewish, and if she is Jewish, she's most likely not observant. In spite of the fact that the hosts kept telling me that I needed to be "sexy" and not "hide" in my clothing, I loved being a part of the show. They were right to encourage me to wear clothing that was my size, and to emphasize my figure where it needed emphasizing. But sexy doesn't necessarily mean scantily-clad.

The final twist is that when Bialik does go in for a part, it's that of a Hasid. So it's hard to say who wins the battle of wills. But our money is usually on Stacey and Clinton.

Wardrobe! [Tablet]
What Not to Wear - Season Premiere Sneak Peek [YouTube]
Blossom's Mayim Bialik: I Needed a Makeover! [People]
Related: Jezebel Faceoff: Blossom Russo Vs. Clarissa Darling

Hate Your Neighbors? This Is The CD For You!

hortense — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 16:00:00 EDT

Feel like getting revenge on your annoying neighbors? Well now you can, thanks to the "Annoy Your Neighbor" CD, which comes with such cringe-worthy tracks as "off-the-hook phone." They'll call the cops on you in no time! [RandomGoodStuff]

Memo To Senator McCain: My Health Is Not An Extreme Position

Megan — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 12:40:00 EDT

John, I know we don't talk much. Part of that is my fault — after I flirted with you back in 2000, I'll admit I was a little embarrassed at myself. But you didn't help when you literally embraced W and metaphorically embraced The Surge, let alone when you started getting all cozy with nutbags like Jerry Falwell who we used to hate together. But all the ~~women~~ journalists kept talking about your wit and your charm and your willingness to tell the truth to power, so I thought you couldn't really be that bad. But, as it turns out, you are — particularly when it comes to women. And let's not talk about how you used to not be an inflexible ass when it came to the bare minimum of conservative compassion on abortion — exceptions for life, health, rape and incest — I mean, at least then I was able to tell myself it wasn't personal, just political. But you had to go prove me wrong last night, didn't you. How maverick-y of you.

So, my concern for my own health is extreme, huh? My life is less important than the one I might hypothetically at some point bring forth from my womb? I mean, I know that your VP candidate, Sarah Palin, is supposedly very convincing, but did anyone tell you that her "no abortion ever in a million years, not that the Earth has been around that long" position on abortion only flies with about 10 percent of the population? Or were you too busy staring at her tits? I mean, it was pretty obvious that you weren't listening to Obama when he talked about reducing the number of abortions through common-sense ideas like improving sex education, the opportunities for adoption and supporting women who want to have the children and keep them. But what the fuck, dude, for real? The fetus is more important that the woman in which it resides? Really?

I mean, it's not like maternal death is startlingly uncommon in America — as US News reported yesterday, 1 in 4,800 women in America dies in childbirth, compared to 1 in 48,000 in Ireland. So it is actually not outside the motherfucking question that it could happen to me someday, but it's good to know that you'll take a potential future motherless voter over a current voter any day of the week.

And, even if I give try to you the benefit of the doubt and pretend like you were just talking about late term abortions during the debate last night, well, I can go read Gretchen Voss's story about hers — why she had one, how it wasn't avoidable and how ridding the world of such procedures would have made her life much harder. And then I'm back to wondering where you — and I — went wrong.

In short, I'd like you to take your cancer-ridden ass, remove your head from it and insert this [very NSFW] in it instead. And when you're done making one of your stupid faces, maybe you can notice that women are more than just fetus-incubators and make your own damn sandwich.

McCain Mockingly Suggests That Concerns For A Mother's Health Are Extreme [Huffington Post]

Related: Safe, Legal, And Boring [Slate]
McCain's Falwell Flip-Flop [Salon]
McCain's Abortion Flip-Flop [TPM Muckraker]
Abortion and Birth Control [Polling Report]
Too Many Infants — and Moms — Die at Birth [US News & World Report]
My Late-Term Abortion [The Boston Globe]

With "Friends" Like Jesse Jackson, Does Obama Need John McCain?

Megan — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 18:00:00 EDT

Jesse Jackson used to be considered a great man and a great civil rights leader. He was considered MLK's protégé, he was the first African-American candidate to run a credible campaign for the Democratic nomination, he helped free hostages, he fought for social justice... And yet, somehow, with the United States credibly on the cusp of elected its first African-American president — a ceiling that Jackson himself put some cracks in — it's been a tough year for him. Today's news is that as a supporter of Barack Obama — not an adviser — he told the World Policy Forum that Obama's election would reduce the clout of the "Zionists who have controlled American policy for decades." The fuck?

Jackson claimed the right to say this about Obama because he's a "a neighbor or, better still, a member of the family" since Jackson's son, Congressman Jesse Jackson Jr., is a strong supporter of Obama's. In fact, he's such a strong supporter that — for the second time this year — he's had to issue a statement slamming his increasingly erratic father. Obama and Congressman Jackson issued statements taking issue with Reverend Jackson's completely false characterization of Obama's positions on Israel, and the good Reverend was forced to admit that he's had nary a conversation with Obama on the subject in his life.

This is, of course, not the first time Jackson's fucked up when it comes to Obama. The first time, during the primaries, he accused Obama of "acting white" for not being out there enough talking about the Jena 6, a comment he later denied. He was later caught on tape saying "I wanna cut his nuts off" for "telling n*****s how to behave" after Obama spoke about absentee fathers in the African-American community. Of course, Jackson might be just a little sensitive about the subject of absentee fathers, given that he practically stopped visiting the child he had with his mistress in her second year of life, preferring to make sure she was financially supported and had her privacy. So, actually, making anti-Semitic, anti-Israel policy statements while claiming to be speaking on behalf of a candidate he has publicly desired to castrate might be par for the course for the Reverend Jackson this year.

Is he jealous that Obama might rise to the pinnacle of political power that he himself failed to achieve? Or is he just losing his marbles? Or can Sarah Palin's wink do something to a man up close that, thankfully, it can't do over a television feed? Jeebus only knows, but Congressman Jackson needs to get his dad to shut the fuck up already.

The O Jesse Knows [NY Post]
Obama Responds To Report On Jackson Comments [Washington Post]