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Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
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British Bloke Takes Issue With Writer's Men = Eggs Analogy

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sybann
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
Hey Michael, ever hear the expression "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt" (Honest Abe)? I'd like to paraphrase it and say: "Better to remain silent and be thought a douchebag than to speak out and remove all doubt."
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clevernamehere
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
Why is it when something a woman does is very popular all of these male versions of the same thing are promoted not as part of an overall trend, but because we supposedly need balance?

I haven't read Drink, Play, F@ck but it seems pretty clear that its not about a similar journey for a man. Instead it seems to be about how men don't need to do serious introspection since they are basically big children.

Several people on this thread want to see her ex husband's side of things, but I don't see why. She doesn't really bash him and he has only a small place in the book. You don't see people calling for the widow of the guy who wrote the Last Lecture to write a memoir (although it would probably be more interesting and more relevant to the original).
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nora charles
07/21/09

@clevernamehere: I think most people are interested in her husband's side of the story because it was pretty clear from the narrative in Eat, Pray, Love that she cheated on him, left him, and then proceeded to set herself up as the victim who had no idea why her life is so darn hard and went on this great mystical journey to find out. She was hard to root for, and it was hard for me to care about her Journey since she never really set herself up as a compelling "character" in her own narrative. I'm interested in finding out whether or not her ex-husband is more or less sympathetic than she painted him.
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lms11
07/21/09

@nora charles: I didn't get the cheating vibe AT ALL. I think he hated her/she felt bad because she wanted to leave the marriage. Most people don't love getting divorced and generally it doesn't bring out the best in people.
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nora charles
07/21/09

@lms11: Yeah, but I just thought it was kind of convenient that she admitted to falling for someone else when she was still with her husband, moved in with said dude shortly after the divorce, and just glossed over all the details in between. It's entirely possible that she didn't cheat, but given the way she told the story, it seems less likely than the possibility that she did.

. . . which is another reason why I'd like to read his book!--to satisfy my curiosity and find out what actually happened between them.
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clevernamehere
07/21/09

@nora charles: I assume she cheated, but I though she glossed over the details because it wasn't really relevant or fair to her husband to go into detais. I think it would be pretty tacky of her husband to go into details when she didn't make him the boogeyman of her book. I don't care who is more sympathetic.
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lms11
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
I'm just going to jump in and say I loved this book. It's the perfect summer book/travel memoir/spiritual awakening. I didn't find her smarmy or self-satisfied, and I didn't get the vibe she cheated on her husband at ALL. I believe he was just so angry because she wanted to leave the marriage (most people don't take to divorce too kindly). I understand that most don't have the luxury to do what she did (myself included!) but at least she takes me along for the very well written ride. And you all who hate her, your loss, I suppose. I look forward to her next book!
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labeled
07/21/09

@lms11: OK, I wanted to ignore this so hard... But it's NOT "my loss" - it's a difference of opinion, which is fucking allowed, yes?
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schweppes
07/21/09

@labeled: Resist! Resist! Lest this turn into a Jodi Picoult-esque thread :)
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labeled
07/21/09

@schweppes: I patiently await Greying Out by my tender and loving overlords.

Saving me from myself, one font-color at a time. Awesome!
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lms11
07/21/09

@labeled: Totally allowed. Just like I'm losing out on things I don't gain by disliking Tolkien. Or whatever.
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MilointheMeadow
07/21/09

@lms11: I liked this book when I read it too, but maybe part of it was that I was going through my own awkward and painful breakup as well as a tough job interview. Mostly, I just got a sense of deep regret on Gilbert's part mixed with the self-knowledge that she wasn't happy in her marriage. I can understand that.
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minnesotameltdown
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
I like that she got famous enough for other people to try to capitalize on her fame/exploit their connections with her. Hopefully, in a true spirit of equality between the sexes, her ex gets labeled an opportunistic bitch with no real talent of his own whose only shot at success is to latch onto the coattails of his literary genius of an ex-wife.
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Flackette Goes Retro
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
To be fair, she is really very coy about her relationship with her ex-husband and what led to their breakup. I'm not exactly sure what there is to rebut, as halfway through the book I still don't have a clue about him, or what he is like, or what caused their divorce. And yes, I do envy her ability to go traveling the world, but I can't resent the fact that, when presented with an amazing opportunity she took it. I'm frankly just jealous that I wasn't offered a large book advance to travel around the world and write about drowning my heartbreak in gelato.
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Meg
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
I prefer my dirty laundry to be aired in song form. Think of how many times you could listen to Mariah and Eminem duke it out in the time it would take you to sit through this shit.
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laureltreedaphne
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back

I can't imagine his will be any better than the "men's" version of this that was already published.
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cb831
07/21/09

@laureltreedaphne: I saw that in a bookstore last week & thought WTF?
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laureltreedaphne
07/21/09

@cb831:

I saw a very fratty looking guy reading it on the subway last night - and apparently it's already been optioned by Judd Apatow!
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clevernamehere
07/21/09

@laureltreedaphne: God, if that's true I'd lose all interest in his movies. I'm not really a fan, but I think he at least tries to have reasonable female charecters. This looks like just one long gender stereotype.
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laureltreedaphne
07/21/09

@clevernamehere:

I just looked it up again (I had seen the Apatow thing a while ago) and while it's still turning in to a movie, apparently as a vehicle for Steve Carrell, I don't see Apatow's name attached to it anymore.
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bellejay
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
For a sum in the low six figures, I will gladly outline my post-breakup journey through the entire John Hughes oeuvre, various Ben and Jerry's flavours, and a illustrious selection of worn-out sweatpants.
Contact my literary agent for more information.
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Meg
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
If I destroy this book, will everything that it has brought with it be destroyed as well? The discussions? The movie? The rebuttal book? Because I will travel the world, eating every single fucking copy of this book. All while praying that my plan works. And if after eating the last copy, I see little puffs of smoke in the air, over bookstores and theaters, letting me know that I had, in fact, destroyed the book and all it has unleashed on this world? I would LOVE that.
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BabyJane
07/21/09

@Meg: So you liked it?
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Meg
07/21/09

@BabyJane: Haha. I found it life changing, actually. I used to be a nicer person.
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peacemongermom
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
I'm reading EPL right now, and I struggle with how the author comes across...she might be writing about spiritual issues, or gastronomic issues, but she certainly does not struggle with any entitlement issues. I do empathize with her desire to become more self-aware (I am working on that aspect of myself too, and recognize some of the challenges it can entail); however, to take a year - a YEAR - and travel to these places to essentially engage in some High Def Navel Gazing is really a bit of the overkill.

I do think that she did a good job of not airing dirty laundry about her ex - she did indeed take the high road as another commenter pointed out, and I think that her ex's decision to write a novel in response to hers is probably pretty ill-advised. I doubt that I will read it, personally, partly because what Gilbert has written in EPL doesn't really stoke any sort of curiosity on my part to see what the ExMister has to say...
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badmutha
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
So he is going to look for purpose in his life. I am pretty sure letting go of all of your responsibilities and mucking around the Mid-East isn't going to help.
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CurtCole
07/21/09

@badmutha: As seen in the previous administration.
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J.D.Regent
07/21/09

@badmutha: it will help you write a knock off of your ex wife's book!
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SomeAuthorGirl
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
"I'll see your naval gazing journey through Italy, India, and Indonesia and raise you with my Middle Eastern odyssey! Take that!!"
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labeled
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
I promote taking the breakup train for tacos, dollar beer night and a good grudge-fuck.
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BeckySharper
07/21/09

@labeled: Take away the tacos and dollar beer that that's pretty much been my approach. Works, too.
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labeled
07/21/09

@BeckySharper: When I fall, I fall straight into adolescence, full. stop.
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ozu
07/21/09

@labeled: Whisky, hamburgers, and sloppy drunken makeout sessions with people who's name you'll never remember.

Beats Morrissey records any day.
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morninggloria
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
Every time I break up with someone, I don't feel the urge to travel the world, I feel the urge to go out to bars and act in ways that would embarrass my parents.
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gangey
07/21/09

@morninggloria: Hear, hear! Our way is cheaper and probably just as effective.
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laureltreedaphne
07/21/09

In reply to Eat, Pray, Love Author's Husband Talks Back
Good. Honestly, I'm really glad. Throughout Eat, Pray, Love, I couldn't stand all her talk about how hurtful it was to have her husband call her selfish. When really, she was incredibly selfish throughout their divorce, and even more selfish by writing a gigantic book about it.
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Flackette Goes Retro
07/21/09

@laureltreedaphne: I'm not arguing with you, as I'm only halfway through the book, but so far I haven't gotten the feeling that it is a book about the divorce, but more of a book about the year that followed it. I mean, I could write a book about the year in which I took up knitting, graduate school, belly dance, seeing a therapist and internet dating without really making it a book about the breakup that led me into all those things.
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