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tscheese
03/28/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
I hate them. They simply don't work on me. The "short" ones are...well, way WAY too short, and--this is gross--I have some kind of radioactive sweat that destroys and stinkifies anything synthetic. I've tried a variety of sizes and lengths and felt like an awkward collection of lumps in every one.

I have some chub, sure, but I think I look disproportionate when I randomly tamp down on some of that. For chub-rub I have some cut-up yoga pants and cut-off knit gauchos that flow pretty nicely under any ol' skirt, without any weird rolls or lines, and they BREATHE.
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JinxyMcDeath
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
Yay for women business-owners! This lady makes millz. And I wear spanx tights religiously. They are the only tights that don't roll down.
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lucystrawberry: Tier 2 is the new black
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
I wear the spanx camisole almost every day. I have always hated when the waistband of a pair of pants is all chunky under a shirt. i like how the camisole smooths it out.
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lucystrawberry: Tier 2 is the new black
03/27/09

@lucystrawberry hails Blair Waldorfs return!: also, i have small breasts and it takes the place of a bra!
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brendastarlet is on it
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
Spanx are overpriced for what they are -- they've traded on their trendy brand name. But Flexees and Body Nancy Ganz work fine, too. No matter what you end up buying, go to T.J. Maxx rather than pay retail.
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girlwithoutahero
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
I'm curious to try spanx...I've yet to but would love to see if they're really the shit.
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ellaesther
03/27/09

@everydaybrogues: I have Spanx on my patootie even as I type, and I am here to tell you: Yes. Yes, and they are comfortable. What's that you say? Impossible? Not so! I reply. They work, and THEY ARE COMFORTABLE! I don't wear them very often, but when I do, boy am I glad.

I wish I could get back every dime I ever spent on anything else.
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fulanita
03/27/09

@everydaybrogues: They really, truly are the shit. I wear them all of the time. They don't just have the scary suck-up ones where you have to pee out of the hole. They make great "boyshorts" in softer fabrics that smooth out as necessary without squeezing too tight..
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ellaesther
03/27/09

@fulanita: Aaaannnnddd that is what I'm wearing. The boyshorts.
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saintbernadette
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
I realize a lot of people are going to show up and complain about how Spanx are designed to make us fit into a skinny world, reshape our bodies into what society expects, etc. etc.

And while that point could be argued, I love Spanx for the fact that they make the clothes I already have fit better. Everything is even and non-bulgy, and I have a place to wedge my insulin pump. Also, as I mentioned above, they have a built-in pee hole, so you get to urinate like a dude all night.
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Beat Girl
03/27/09

@saintbernadette: I think Spanx are fine. They're not denial of size, merely smoothing and shaping.

But hey, I'm a stick insect. Everyone I know who wears them loves them, though. (And looks hot!)
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TheUptightMidwesterner
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
I have a tummy pouch that decided it wants to die with me.
I love Spanx and Flexees (cheaper and at Kohls).

I just got tired of looking 5 months pregnant when my kid is in school. No matter how much I crunch or run that pooch is here to stay.
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copious
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
Spanx are fabulous for under clothing.

There's another company called "Yummie Tummie" (just google it and you'll find it). And they make AMAZING tops that you slim you, and just look like a regular t-shirt or tank top.

I have one of the tank tops and it makes my stomach look so much smoother!
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Idscnyco
03/27/09

@copious:

Sorry, is it me or does this post sound a bit too much like advertising?
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inabook
03/27/09

@Idscnyco: I dunno, it sounds servicey to me.
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Whiskey and Popcorn
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
These items are sure to Whip you into shape, ensuring your new look will be a Hit. That said, the whole Spanx thing Smacks of sexism- a real Blow to body confidence.
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Mary McCarthyite
03/27/09

@JanicefromSA: Whiskey and popcorn: You are really good at that; so Punchy!
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YourScreenplaySucks
03/27/09

@JanicefromSA: Whiskey and popcorn: You are like a pun-producing machine. I would like one of you for my kitchen.
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Whiskey and Popcorn
03/27/09

I just screamed to the sleeping sister that one of the wittiest people on Jez COMPLIMENTED ME!
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YourScreenplaySucks
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
Yay!! I, for one, am looking forward to Facial Spanx to slim down any unsightly cheek and chin bulbousness. But I'm super, super excited about Full Body Sock Spanx, which will not only cover my entire fat head, but my hands, neck, and feet! It's about time society admitted that most women's bodies are fundamentally unsightly.
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fuzzyorangabear
03/27/09

@Your Screenplay Sucks: I love this.
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brendastarlet is on it
03/27/09

@fuzzyorangabear: I am looking forward to the Spanx sweater set, which will mold you into a shape last seen in 1962.

And after that, Spanx jeans. If you thought you couldn't move in cotton, just wait until you are encased in denim Spanx!
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saintbernadette
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
Here's what I love about Spanx: peeing through the built-in hole.
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NellMood
03/27/09

@saintbernadette: No! Seriously? There's a hole??
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aabbbiee
03/27/09

@saintbernadette: I never do that. I always wrestle them down and back up again. The hole makes me uncomfortable. But I'm an admitted prude.
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saintbernadette
03/27/09

@NellMood: Yep. Just squat and pee and you're on your way.
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NellMood
03/27/09

@saintbernadette: That is fascinating.
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SylvanSylph
03/27/09

@saintbernadette: I am far, far too uncoordinated for that.
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jeepgirl
03/27/09

@saintbernadette: Wait, what??? Doesn't your hoo-ha kind of rub up against your pants? I think I would feel so vulnerable.
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saintbernadette
03/27/09

@jeepgirl...put a brarawn to go four-wheelin': I've only worn them with skirts and dresses, and it's liberating.

Also, it's kind of hard to explain. It's sort of like a coin purse or a fly on men's briefs. It opens when you need it to.
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jeepgirl
03/27/09

@saintbernadette: Ah, I think I know where you're going there, I learn something new every day!

Now that I've learned something, I'll go open up the chardonnay
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rah29
03/27/09

@aabbbiee: Me too. Sing it sister!
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olivia2.0
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
Spanx do work ladies, sorta. They don't make you drop 25 pounds, but they do smooth things out in a nice way, when they are UNDER the clothes that is. Also, it cracks me up, EVERY TIME that the Target brand Spanx-like product is called "Assests". Truly hilarious.
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SylvanSylph
03/27/09

@olivia2.0: I always crack up in the hoisery aisle...
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hfree
03/27/09

@olivia2.0: It's the exact same product, both are made by Sara Blakely.
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fuzzyorangabear
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
These make me angry--just like high heels. It's like society is saying (again), "You're a woman, your only purpose is to fit this mold. Who cares if you're comfortable?"

And there's me jumping in the background, hand raised, shouting, "I do! Ooh, ooh, I do!"

Comfort over conformity any day of the week.
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saintbernadette
03/27/09

@fuzzyorangabear: Spanx are about, oh, 6 or 7 million times more comfortable than high heels.
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greengrey
03/27/09

@fuzzyorangabear: I don't wear spax (I think it's weird), but you can pry my heels from my cold dead hands. I like being taller than 6'. I can see men's bald spots from up there.
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girlwithoutahero
03/27/09

@greengrey: I like to wear heels so I can look down at people both figuratively and literally.

I kid.

Sometimes.
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fuzzyorangabear
03/27/09

@saintbernadette: @greengrey: @everydaybrogues: @cantstopwontstop: I can definitely see all of your points. I definitely like to feel pretty, too. I guess I should state here and now that I'm a little bit of a hippy, and I hate not being comfortable. Working an office job has put enormous pressure on me to conform, and I guess I'm a smidge bitter. :)
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WashingMyHair
03/27/09

@fuzzyorangabear: You have every right to be bitter, comfort is important!
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boxspelunker
03/27/09

@fuzzyorangabear: This is me. I hate the idea that one day, I may not be able to wear a knit hat at work to keep my hair out of my eyes. Curses! I don't think dreads are appropriate for many things and I hate trying to control my curly hair into something that isn't a really tight ponytail!
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limeflamingo
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
i worked in underwear for a summer, and i swear, the only time anyone EVER bought shapewear was because they had to go to a wedding
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lilbobbytables
03/27/09

@limeflamingo: Oh, I misinterpreted what you were saying at first.
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brendastarlet is on it
03/27/09

@limeflamingo: did they call it underwear or "foundations?"

I sold lingerie for a summer and had to battle for customers with a 70-plus year old sales woman, who always had a tape-measure around her neck and would burst into dressing rooms unannounced to make sure the customers had the right size. All day long, you could hear these muffled shrieks of surprise as their privacy was invaded.
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DuchessofHazards
03/27/09

In reply to Spanx To Expand Into Clothing Line
I need a perfect pencil skirt, please.
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tomatoheart
03/27/09

@DuchessofHazards: i import mine from dorothy perkins...i have several and i LOVE them.
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