Karma isn't real. Proof: Diddy created Danity Kane (never forget) and now he is being rewarded. He and Kate Upton have apparently been dating since late March, when the 20-year-old joined him in the VIP room of a club in Miami so they could smash their mouths together.
So THIS is The Best, Inc.: Amy Poehler has oh-so-quietly been dating fellow comedian Nick Kroll of The League and Best Week Ever. The two nommed on food at a restaurant on Sunset Boulevard, and "sources" (a busboy? a napkin ring? O'Brien from Downton Abbey?!?! WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE) say that it wasn't the first date…
First order of business, when I become lady-president, THE OCEAN WILL BE ILLEGAL. Seriously, that shit is just a big wet menace full of teeth and ghosts. And the other day it tried to steal away Heidi Klum's son Henry and both of his nannies, prompting AquaKlum to jump in and save their lives in some epic mom-heroics.