Honestly, I never thought sex was all that confusing until I started scanning the covers of magazines at the grocery checkout. Now I feel like I should be operating off a very detailed list of checks and balances. If I'm not in the mood for sex because I'm tired/stressed/needing alone time, he should buy me shoes. if he buys me shoes, I should fuck him as a thank you. Does the price of the shoes affect the amount or quality of the thank-you sex? If he buys me Christian Louboutins, do I have to invite over two of my young, nubile friends?
This whole article is a monument for shitty advice.
New shoes? I'm really not that into shoes, plus not every woman wears the same size across brand.
Their advice for dealing with a woman who is self-conscious about her body is to stop complimenting her because apparently saying "Nice legs" makes women think you hate their butt. What?
The article say that women don't orgasm because they think to much but all of there advice basically involves bossing her around. As if just doing what Men's Health says should work, no need to actually ask her how she likes to be touched.
I'm most offended by the shoe thing, I am most concerned, however, about the whole "If she's quiet in the sack and you want her to be a screamer, go ahead and make noise of your own. You can even sing a little!" (I'm paraphrasing, but it's there.)
Dude. If you start singing while we're having sex, either the singing or the sex must stop immediately.
what the hell kind of person buys another person shoes? how do you know they'll fit? buying shoes as a gift for another human being has never occurred to me (except maybe for a baby).
i have a girlfriend whose dad buys her shoes he thinks she'll like, usually cute heels. i don't know what to make of this.
If I fail to initiate sex, there's probably something wrong with me. I may be sick. Or stressed. Or something else.
A guy could :gasp: TALK to me and see whats up. But that would take communication and actually thinking I'm more than just something to fuck.
@greengrey: Most of the time, for me, all it takes is for him to clean the kitchen or do the laundry. Does this make me some sort of household chore prostitute? Maybe, but otherwise, I'm just too tired.
@greengrey: oh, you're hilarious greengrey. Respect and communication? Who wants that? I mean, we all know you would just be withholding sex to get what you want, and don't you want more shoes?
I think Men's Health has made a decision to treat all women like Dug from Up. Our initial affection is easily won, but we're also easily distra-- SHOES!
Also, I like it when tabloids use the word "flux" in non-scientific ways. They should print a picture of Brad, Angie, and Jen under the big headline "FLUXING!"
@le monde is rond: I like to imagine Jen was tired of Brad and realized she wasn't the marriage type, but thought He and her pal Angelina should go on a blind date since he was having trouble during the initial separation. Angelina clips home decorating and remodeling articles to mail to Jen, while Jen takes the kids every so often so Angie and Brad can go see a movie and go out to dinner. The kids call her Aunt Jen and look forward to being stuffed full of junk food and Jen likes giving them back to their parents after a few hours when they are no fun anymore. And every October they all take a weekend trip to Vermont because Brad and John Mayer are such suckers for those fall colors. This has all been a publicity scam, and we are all suckers.
08/31/09
08/31/09
08/30/09
I need a flow chart.
08/30/09
New shoes? I'm really not that into shoes, plus not every woman wears the same size across brand.
Their advice for dealing with a woman who is self-conscious about her body is to stop complimenting her because apparently saying "Nice legs" makes women think you hate their butt. What?
The article say that women don't orgasm because they think to much but all of there advice basically involves bossing her around. As if just doing what Men's Health says should work, no need to actually ask her how she likes to be touched.
Its one big fail.
08/31/09
08/30/09
Dude. If you start singing while we're having sex, either the singing or the sex must stop immediately.
08/30/09
08/30/09
08/30/09
08/30/09
08/30/09
i have a girlfriend whose dad buys her shoes he thinks she'll like, usually cute heels. i don't know what to make of this.
08/30/09
A guy could :gasp: TALK to me and see whats up. But that would take communication and actually thinking I'm more than just something to fuck.
08/30/09
08/30/09
08/30/09
08/30/09
08/30/09
08/30/09
08/30/09
07/05/09
07/05/09
07/05/09