• A friend of Daul Kim who IM'd with the model the night before Kim was found dead in her Paris apartment says that Kim complained of feeling depressed, and was in an abusive relationship. But she was scared to leave:

• Writes reporter Peter Davis, who read the chat, "She'd punched him in the face; he'd yanked her hair. But she was afraid to leave him, afraid to suffer the agony of being apart. The last time they separated, she hadn't been able to eat, dropping from 112 to 99 lbs. Her friend begged her to leave town, book a job, call her mother. No, she said. She'd miss her dog. She ended the conversation abruptly, saying she was going off to the clean the house. A few hours later, Kim was found by her boyfriend, hanged in her luxurious apartment in Paris' 10th arrondissement." This alleged history of violence between Kim and her boyfriend is the reason her father is understood to not believe his daughter killed herself. The rest of The Daily Beast's story is the usual sensationalist "5'10" stunner" bullshit, leavened with factual errors. Davis has Kim's work history spectacularly confused, and even gets both the name and the URL of Kim's acclaimed blog wrong. [TDB]
• Top Australian model Catherine McNeil — who has been taking a five-month break from her work — appeared in public in Sydney with what appear to be self-inflicted cuts on her arms. (Her agent says she "fell off her skateboard and into some bushes.") Sensitive news articles that quote experts on the subject of self-harm will probably help the situation, right? Oh, wait. The professor this paper dug up says: "Self-harm is, sadly, very common and is becoming a bit of a trend...In some groups of young people, it's even considered virtually a fashionable thing to do." [Daily Telegraph]
• Sharon Stone went to Uganda and saw some people with "nothing to eat. literally zero to eat." So her new jewelry collection for Damiani will devote a portion of its proceeds to building wells in developing countries. [WWD]
• Tom Ford: "I like Twilight. I liked the first one, and I'm dying to see the new one." [The Cut]
• Would Lady Gaga take inspiration from Doctor Who for a stage outfit? I think we all know the answer is yes. [Telegraph]
• Pierre Bergé, who is the president of French AIDS charity Sidaction — the recent auction of Bergé's and Yves Saint Laurent's household goods and art collection went to benefit Sidaction — went on French television to tell off a fund-raising telethon for children with muscular dystrophy. The telethon is "[sponging] off the generosity of the French in a populist manner by exhibiting the unhappiness of children," said Bergé. [WWD]
• Coco Chanel used to wear these big enamel bangles with the Maltese cross on them. They were made for her specially by a socialite jewelry designer who happened to be a member of the Italian nobility. Naturally, Verdura, the company the socialite founded, is reissuing the bangles in sets of two, made of 18ct yellow gold, and set with enough gemstones to make the 7-year-old rockhound in all of us squeal: there are sapphires, rubies, emeralds, amethysts, aquamarines, Madeira topaz, citrines, and a prasolite. Just in time for the holidays! They are, of course, price on application. [Telegraph]
• Stella McCartney had a comedy troupe in drag for her holiday party. Sounds like our kind of shindig. [Elle UK]
• Leona Lewis is going to do an animal-friendly fashion line with McCartney. [OK!]
• And McCartney has lined up Natalia Vodianova for her spring campaign. The Russian model will also be replacing Christy Turlington as the face of YSL — apparently Stefano Pilati is still on his supermodels kick — and she nabbed Givenchy's campaign. [Elle UK]
• Making Hermès boots involves soaking Swiss bullhides in chestnut oil. What, like you think they'd use inferior German bullhides? Pshaw. [Telegraph]
• Sean "P. Diddy" Combs will appear on a sleek, all-white set with windows that display the New York skyline, an animal skin rug on the floor, and a gas fire, to toast his latest act of selling out: Shilling his perfumes — count 'em, he's got two — on HSN. [WWD]
• Anna Wintour went to a party to celebrate current Vogue cover woman Cate Blanchett's role in A Streetcar Named Desire. [TDB]
• Charis Wilson, a model and Edward Weston's muse and wife, has died in California, aged 95. [NYTimes]
• By the way, that little fashion show Victoria's Secret threw a few nights back cost around $10 million to produce. [WWD]
• Sales of women's clothing fell 3.3% on last year for the first half of November, the opening of the traditional holiday shopping period. Department store sales fell 7.1%, and sales of men's clothing fell just 1%. Online sales across all categories rose 19.4%. [AP]

[New York, September 2. Image via INF]

• Justin Timberlake will attempt to finish what Ann Curry started: He'll head to Tanzania and climb Mount Kilimanjaro.

Timberlake's goal is to raise awareness of the global water crisis. Rapper Lupe Fiasco and singer Kenna are going with him (?!). He says: "I've been training four times a week to get my VO2 (oxygen consumption) levels up to expand my lungs. We'll climb a week straight, carrying 30 pounds on our backs. It's going to be intense, but it's going to be so rewarding. We're going to be ready for it." [Mirror via GQ]

• High times: Amy Winehouse and Snoop Dogg collaborated last year, but were too stoned to finish the tracks! [The Sun]
• But Amy has been getting all detoxed in St. Lucia — she does a lot of mud treatments to draw out impurities. [TMZ]
• Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are mentioned as a cheap ploy for attention in this beyond stoopid press release. [Breitbart]
• Mel Gibson has "fled" to Costa Rica with his "mystery blonde." [Daily Express]
• Why hasn't Eminem been on the scene for three years? He's been on drugs. He says: "I wasn't ready mentally. I wasn't ready to give up the drugs. I didn't think that I had a problem. Basically, I went in, and I came out. I relapsed, and I spent the next three years struggling with it. Also, at that time, I felt like I wanted to pull back, because my drug problem had got so bad." He was also impacted by the death of his friend Proof: "I think it kind of hit me so hard. It just blindsided me. I just went into such a dark place that, with everything, the drugs, my thoughts, everything. And the more drugs I consumed, and it was all depressants I was taking, the more depressed I became, the more self-loathing I became." [XXL via The Sun]
• ZOMG Lindsay and Sam ran into each other. [Page Six]
• This report insinuates that Justin Long is super into Drew Barrymore, while she's all, we're just friends. [Gatecrasher]
• Kate Moss had to cut short a vacay in the Maldives because her boyfriend and her gal pal weren't getting along. [Daily Mail]
• Jennifer Aniston and Steve Zahn have a sex scene in the new movie Management. But poor Jen still can't escape being compared to Angelina; this column notes: "While it's no Mr. & Mrs. Smith, let's just say Mike (Zahn) ends up with his shirt off and his pants down to his ankles and Sue (Aniston) on her back on top of a table." [E!]
• The producers of Slumdog Millionaire have donated $740,000 to children living in Indian slums. [People]
• Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia has renewed Martha Stewart's contract and will pay Martha Stewart at least $2 million for the next three years so she can continue living as Martha Stewart. [WSJ]
• Even though In Touch reported that Kate Hudson would be on , she apparently doesn't "do" TV. The rumor is "not true," says her rep. [E!]
• Matthew Perry on Lost? "It is not true," says Perry. "I really don't know why those rumors have been floating about. I have admitted I am a Lost junkie. And at the press junket for [17 Again] I was asked what my favorite TV show was and I said [Lost], so maybe that's how they started." [EW]
• Mandy Moore got help for her new acoustic rock album Amanda Leigh from her "in-home teacher," husband Ryan Adams. [Mirror]
• Lady GaGa rocked the gay bash known as the Palm Springs White Party. She has said: "I love the gay community. Like bleeding heart love the gay community…it's a genuine love I have for them." [NBC Bay Area]
• Audrina on her new reality show: "It's my life after The Hills, my journey. It's going to be a little spicier, edgier, older." We think this means drunken makeout sessions. [People]
• Keisha Knight Pulliam, aka Rudy from The Cosby Show, is getting her own reality show on Oxygen, which involves her live-in boyfriend and will "explore what it's like to be "young, rich, single and co-habitating." The show will be called "Keisha and Kaseem." [AP]
• Guess who else is getting a reality show? Fantasia Barrino. [Reuters]
• Which Idol judge should go: Kara or Paula? [MSNBC]
• It seems that Bruce Springsteen is the "victim" in that NJ divorce scandal where the wife was calling him the other man in her marriage. A source says: "The wife pestered Bruce, but he didn't have an affair with her. He's freaked out that he was named in her divorce because he barely knows her." [National Enquirer]
• Daniel Radcliffe says the kissing scene between Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley is awkward: "Harry's got a real thing for her, and that is slightly odd because when we met I was 11 and she was nine." [Telegraph]
• Speaking of Harry Potter, the Half Blood Prince flick will open two days sooner. [NY Daily News]
• Uh, they are really squeezing the life out of this franchise: There will be a 5th Fast and Furious film. [NY Daily News]
• Miss USA contestants will wear swimsuits from the Jessica Simpson Collection Sunday night. [NY Daily News]
• Real Housewife Jill Zarin had a breast reduction and "feels 20 lbs lighter." [Page Six]
• Sean "Diddy" Combs has just been cast in a Judd Apatow flick, along with Elisabeth Moss and Rose Byrne. Get Him To The Greek stars Jonah Hill and Russell Brand, and the gist of it is that a record label intern (Hill) is hired to get an out-of-control rock star (Brand) from London to a gig at the Greek Theater in L.A. While it might have been interesting if things were shaken up a bit, Diddy plays the record label boss while Moss and Byrne play girlfriends. Of course. [Hollywood Reporter]
• David Duchovny and Tea Leoni are so back on they have matching tattoos now. [Daily Express]
• Catherine Keener has been cast in a fantasy/adventure flick called Percy Jackson, in which she will play a mom whose son is half human (his father is Poseidon). [Hollywood Reporter]
• Here's a profile on legendary producer Jon Peters, whose memoir is "filled with outrageous tales of Jack Nicholson and hookers, and Barbara Walters in her undies." he may have told a room of people that Baba Wawa had "a great rack and nice ass." [The Daily Beast]
• After saying that he "totally understands OJ" Simpson, Hulk Hogan has issued a statement, claiming he "in no way condones the OJ situation. As part of a larger conversation, he referred to it to exemplify his frustration with his own situation." [ET]
• Meanwhile Linda Hogan says she is "taking these recent comments seriously." [ET]
• "Electroclash godmother Peaches and voodoo loving rave producer Drums of Death get together in the latest issue of Dazed & Confused to talk about drugs, power ballads, performance art, their favourite fancy dress costumes, and working together on her new album I Feel Cream." [Dazed Digital]
• Former "pin-up" Heather Thomas has written a novel called Trophies, about Hollywood wives and fundraising. She says: "I researched this and found these wives are responsible for directing about 80 percent of the foundation monies in America. It is the wives who have the time and can draw things to their husband's attention. Trophy wives are seen as charms on a man's arm, but I have come in contact with a lot of billionaires and their wives are busy and often have PhDs and are brilliant businesswomen. I've yet to meet a bimbo trophy wife." [Reuters]
• A former publicist for James Brown is suing for control of his estate. [USA Today]
• Actress Tawny Kitaen has settled a fraud suit against her ex, so you can go back to not thinking about her. [AP]
• Blind item! "Which funnyman doesn't even bother to hide his drug habit? When pals come to visit his pad, they're just as likely to see baggies of cocaine lying around as they are to see throw pillows." [Gatecrasher]
• "Your blob [sic] is very funny and clever. You have so much fun with it. No wonder everyone loves it." — Diablo Cody's mom. [Page Six]
• "When the show started it was such a different beast. It was exciting and dangerous and funny and edgy and bizarre. [Then] it started feeling a little complacent, and that was very frustrating… When you have a jewel, why not polish it and put it out there for all to see?" — Nicolette Sheridan on Desperate Housewives, which she felt never gave her character enough attention. (Her last episode airs Sunday.) [LA Times]
• "Edie's already slept with most of the guys on the street and has caused about as many problems as she could. We will find a new kind of sexiness coming through Wisteria Lane. What I won't do is cast another fortysomething sexy blonde. [Sheridan] performed the aging neighborhood tramp better than anyone has ever done before." — Desperate Housewives creator Marc Chery. [LA Times]
• "I think a wedding is about love, friends, family and fun. I think spending millions of dollars on a wedding is ridiculous and it has never been my dream. I would never do that." — Salma Hayek, denying she is planning an extravagant $2 million ceremony to follow her City Hall nuptials in February. [People]
• "I think this movie presents the relationship between the media and the government - and it's kind of interesting because it says that the institutions are both a little bit corrupt." — Ben Affleck, on State Of Play. [LA Times]
• "I have a little blog that I do with some friends, but beyond that, I'm kind of clueless when it comes to the Internet. I just got e-mail down pat. So I've got to speed it up, I guess. But I tend to get my news from the radio. I don't know why, it's just the way I like it." — Rachel McAdams. [LA Times]
• "I kind of value having people not know where I am or what I'm doing." — Zac Efron, who avoids MySpace and Facebook. [Reuters]
• "I have never seen that (From Justin to Kelly), other than the time I had to sit through it at the premiere. I was contractually obligated to, and I fought that with tears - I did not want to do that movie." — Kelly Clarkson. [MSNBC Scoop via Rolling Stone]

• Leighton Meester and Blake Lively share an ice cream cone on Rolling Stone's new cover. The girl-on-girl antics continue inside, with the girls sucking on a Twizzler and each other's thumbs.

• The rest of the Gossip Girl cast gets away with having a clothed pillow fight and cuddling in bed together. [Gothamist, Rolling Stone]
• New York Magazine points out that they've already photographed the cast in a big white bed together (and done it better). [NY Magazine]
• Love lockdown! Kanye West has been charged with misdemeanor battery, grand theft and vandalism over destroying a paparazzo's camera on video at LAX in September. [AP]
• Liz Smith says she was told Natasha Richardson is "dead". Though that hasn't been confirmed, Smith says moving her to Lenox Hill was a bad sign and that, earlier this afternoon, she was taken off life support. An insider says: "Nobody goes to Lenox Hill who is really sick; if she'd had a chance to live, they'd have found another great brain hospital!" [Wowowow]
• Supposedly medics on the ambulance that transported Natasha Richardson said she was brain dead. A source said she was "unconscious," her pupils "non-reactive," her skin was "pale" and she was suffering from "major head trauma." Liam Neeson reportedly held her hand the entire time and caressed her face during the ride. [TMZ]
• Subscribers will get a copy of Entertainment Weekly with Paul Rudd on the cover, but the mag put Natasha Richardson on the cover being sold on newsstands. [ONTD]
• A judge has ordered Adnan Ghalib to stay away from Britney Spears for three years. [TMZ]
• Is Bruce Willis marrying his girlfriend, model Emma Heming? The National Enquirer says the wedding is going down this weekend in some "exotic location." [Perez Hilton]
• Eddie Cibrian is denying the rumors that he's having an affair with LeAnn Rimes. Supposedly he told a friend: "LeAnn and I are friends, we went to dinner, that's it. The most ridiculous thing is that people believe I would do something like this period … much less do it in a public place. The false accusations are obviously causing a rift at home, but me and my family will get through this together." The security camera photos printed in Star today (which you can read about in Midweek Madness) paint a different picture. [Perez Hilton]
• LeAnn Rimes issued a statement on her website and she isn't denying the affair. She writes: "This is a difficult time for me and my loved ones, but I appreciate all your continued support.
  I would like to assure all of you that this is a place for you to hear things directly from me and as you all know, not everything in our lives is always black and white." [Perez Hilton]
• Dean Sheremet, LeAnn Rimes' husband, Twittered today, "I love my wife!!!" [Perez Hilton]
• John Mayer isn't writing a tell all book about Jennifer Aniston, as the cover of Star Magazine claims. Mayer's rep says: "Even for them, its a new low. They've dressed themselves up but they're no better than the Enquirer. Despite their low standards it's still not ok to make up stories and print them. Unfortunately, while we're considering legal action, Star Magazine is already at work on next week's cover story about some reality tv star's secret marriage to Elvis." [Perez Hilton]
• A remake of the film Arthur is in the works and producers want Russell Brand to play the title role with Sir Anthony Hopkins as his wise-cracking butler. [The Daily Express]
• Sean Stewart, son of Rod Stewart and Celebrity Rehab cast member, appeared on Judge Jeanine Pirro and said his dad is "very cheap." [The Daily Mail]
• Jessica Lange fell yesterday at her Minnesota cabin. She grabbed for a railing that was not secure and fell over, breaking her shoulder and collarbone and dislocating her arm. She received treatment at a local hospital. [TMZ]
• Pink and husband Carey Hart are indeed back on. They were seen exiting her tour bus together in Berlin. [Perez Hilton]
• Andrew Morton says that the drama surrounding whether or not Prince William is engaged to Kate Middleton has a decidedly retro feel. He writes: "Whatever becomes of Kate Middleton, she will always be marked by the man she knew rather than what she knows. If Michelle Obama seems the acme of social modernity and progress, the romance of Kate and William harks back to another arcane era." [The Daily Beast]
• When asked if she plans to have more kids, Jennifer Lopez said, "Let me work just a little bit first. Let me get a couple things out there... one song, one movie, something ... I like [need] to recuperate." [The Star]
• Eric Nies from the first Real World: New York spotted a puppy drowning and stripped naked to jump in the partially frozen lake and save the dog. There are pictures. [TMZ]
• In this video Martha Stewart says she still isn't coping with the loss of her dog Ghenghis Khan in a freak propane tank explosion last week. [TMZ]
• Audrina Patridge is getting her very own Hills spinoff. [Perez Hilton]
• Designing Women is coming out on DVD. [Entertainment Weekly]
• Heavily pregnant PETA members posed naked in cages to protest against chef Jaime Oliver, who urged people to buy British pork rather than pork raised overseas under worse conditions. Oliver's rep says he's a big supporter of animal welfare and his restaurants serve pork from "the happiest pigs you can get." Peta representatives say: "The answer to saving pigs is not to buy British pork, it's to go vegetarian." [The Telegraph]
• Brad Pitt and Natalie Portman will star in a film adaptation of the book Important Artifacts and Personal Property from the Collection of Lenore Doolan and Harold Morris, Including Books, Street Fashion, and Jewelry The book looks like a Sotheby's estate auction catalog, with 325 entries and photographs of items that tell the story of the relationship between a fictitious a 40ish photographer (Pitt) and a New York Times food columnist in her late 20s (Portman). [Variety]
• Everyone is angry that British tabloid OK! put out a tribute to dying reality star Jade Goody even though she's still alive - except Jade. The magazine put out a statement saying: "Jade's family have spoken to OK! today to reiterate that they understand the tribute issue and view it as being very kind to Jade." [The Mirror]
• Kim Kardashian is one the cover of Russian Playboy. [The Sun]
• Um, here are the NSFW photos of Kim Kardashian from inside Russian Playboy. [ONTD]
• Robert Pattinson says that even before he started acting he always thought he was a fraud and was faking his emotions. He says: "I remember when I was a teenager thinking my girlfriend was cheating on me, and going around riling myself up. Pretending to cry. It was totally illegitimate-I actually didn't feel anything. I went to some pub and then went crying all the way home. And I got into my dog's bed. I was crying and holding on to the dog. I woke up in the morning, and the dog was looking at me like, ‘You're a fake.' ... I thought I'd seen her with another guy, but she wasn't even there. I spent three days apologizing to the dog." [GQ]
• Prince Williams went on a U.K. children's show and said his patronage of London's Royal Marsden Hospital is something that would make mom proud. "For a very long time my mother was involved with the Royal Marsden, and she had a very close connection with them ... So I wanted to follow in her footsteps, in that sense, and help." Diana opened the children's unit in 1993 and Prince William is supporting the building of a Children's and Teenage Cancer Centre. [People]
• Michael Sheen, who played Tony Blair in The Queen and David Frost in Frost/Nixon says playing so many real people has taken its toll. "Have I got an identity crisis? Yeah, I don't know who I am really. You give me a script and then, I'm that," said Sheen. [The Star]
• 50 Cent has a backhanded compliment for Sean Combs in King magazine. He says: "Puffy has the best model for staying relevant, because [he does it] without a song. He's been able to maintain an interest and stay in a space to executive produce television and film projects, and stay relevant to hip-hop culture. What was the last record that made you feel like, ‘Oh, my God, Puffy is on fire'? You don't need it. That's what makes his business model exciting to me." [Perez Hilton]

• Video: Samantha Ronson peels out of a Vegas club parking lot. A minute later, Lindsay Lohan emerges, saying, "Did she leave? She fucking left? Where's my car? I want my fucking keys now." [TMZ]

• More on this in Midweek Madness, but: Brad Pitt! And the nanny?!?! "Angelina flew into a jealous rage when she walked past the open bedroom door of 8-month-old twins, Knox and Vivienne - and didn't like what she saw! And it's not surprising, for Brad was on the bed, rubbing the back of a pretty young nanny! Angie got so mad she slapped Brad and fired the girl on the spot!" [Star]
• Speaking of Brad and Angie, E! donated $250,000 to the Jolie-Pitt Foundation last year. They probably thought it would get them not-snubbed on the red carpet; the money went to Brad's Make It Right Foundation in New Orleans and three different UN organizations working in Darfur. [Fox 411]
• George Clooney got drunk and was seen stumbling back to his hotel in St. Louis. [Gatecrasher]
• Hmm, Sean "Diddy" Combs says he did Chris Brown and Rihanna a "favor" by letting them stay at his house. "It's my house, and I'm allowed to give my house to whoever I want to give my house to," Diddy told Ellen. "I don't cast a stone – cast judgment on anybody. So, if friends ask me for a favor, then I'm going to be there for a favor as long as I know the energy of the favor is positive." He also said: "I don't think it's right for anybody to hit anybody." [People]
• The father of Chris Brown's manager, Tina Davis, says of the speculation that Chris and Tina were having a romantic relationship is just" old rumors." [E!]
• Hey, guess who's not going to the Kids' Choice Awards? Chris Brown. [People]
• Miley Cyrus says she's not ready to move in with her 20-year-old boyfriend: "I love him to death…but no…[Justin] is so smart, but just like, everything has to, like, go where it's supposed to go and if it doesn't, I get like really frustrated." Uh, what? [Page Six]
• So on Dancing With Stars, Lil Kim gave her former fellow inmates a shoutout. The Scoop asks, "Is it possible for inmates to vote for Dancing With the Stars, but not for the president?" A spokesperson from prison says: "The inmates cannot dial toll-free numbers." And there's no internet. So. [MSNBC Scoop]
• This piece, titled "Octomom Spurs Media Madness" is about how Oprah and Dr. Phil saw ratings jump with Nadya Suleman-themed shows. [Variety]
• Oh, of course TMZ's Harvey Levin has seen the tape of Nadya Suleman giving birth. Jeez. He says the "friend" filming was "annoying the doctors and nurses by getting in the way." [TMZ]
• Holy crap: PETA vice president Dan Mathews shook hands with Anna Wintour. [Page Six]
• The French are mad at Carla Bruni for showing up at a Mexican state dinner wearing "a dazzling array" of diamonds — her husband, President Nicolas Sarkozy, was in Mexico to discuss the world recession. Anyway, they're calling her Marie Antoinette. [Gatecrasher]
• There's an interesting interview with Katy Perry on Esquire's site, and at the top of the web browser frame are the words "Katy Perry Naked - Hot Pics Of Katy Parry[sic] Topless." She is neither naked nor topless. [esquire]
• Someone somewhere claims that Mischa Barton didn't want to audition for the new Melrose Place but to just be given a role. In the end she had to go through the casting process like anyone else, sigh. Tough times! [Perez]
• Meanwhile, word is that Ashlee Simpson is doing Melrose because she wants something stable so she can be close to her baby. [People]
• The American Idol "dialing disaster" was averted, hopefully. You know Anoop's original phone number was a sex line, right? [People]
• Geri Halliwell has said ciao to her Italian fiancé. [The Sun]
• Does Amy Winehouse want to work on a TV quiz show? And more important: Wouldn't you watch? [The Sun]
• Amy Winehouse has been updating her Facebook page to say things like "Nothing is worth as much as Blake," and "Where's my oblivious Blakey Boy?" For some reason, this is "news." [The Sun]
• "Hundreds of women in skimpy two-pieces will gather Saturday on the shore in Miami Beach and spell out the word C-O-S-M-O for an aerial photograph to be featured in the August issue." For Cosmopolitan, that classy publication. [Page Six]
• Hulk Hogan needs cash. His lawyers are trying to get some assets unfrozen; the Hulkster had back surgery and won't be able to work for awhile. [AP]
• Q: Are you busy? A: I'm trying to be busy. It's not so easy. Everyone thinks I'm dead. — From an interview with Lauren Bacall. [Houston Chronicle]
• Oy: Matt Lucas, co-creator of Little Britain, is working on a Jewish sitcom. [Telegraph]
• Jade Goody, the Brit celeb diagnosed with cervical cancer and given weeks to live, has left the hospital to be home with her husband and kids. [BBC News]
• Sir Paul McCartney's show in Las Vegas is already sold out, sorry. Tickets were gone seven seconds after going on sale. [Mirror]
• Blind item: "Which Celebrity Apprentice was such a boozebag behind the scenes that all alcohol had to be removed from the set?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I wasn't, quote, 'dropped' from the movie. I resigned from the movie because I didn't think I had enough time to achieve the look of the wrestler who was on steroids, which I would never do." — Nicolas Cage, on The Wrestler. Then he said: "The movie was written for Mickey. And, for whatever reason, they couldn't get the financing for the movie back then."
• "Fortunately I haven't had any break-ups. This is my first relationship. I'm very, very happy, that's all I'll say. We were together for a really long time before we got married, we were in no rush." — Beyoncé. [The Star]
• "I always wanted to suspend from the ceiling in a twirling banana. I'm going to be inside the banana. So the banana drops into a fruit bowl with the other sparkling, glorious fruit, and their tops pop off and dancers come out and help peel me out of the banana. I have a fascination with fruit… It's Lucille Ball meets Bob Mackie. It's about innuendo. I want everybody to get the joke, but I want them to think about it for a minute." — Katy Perry, on her persona. [Esquire]
• "If things happen in the press that are hard to deal with or you give in to that awful temptation to occasionally Google yourself and be mortified at what people can write about you. It's hard to ignore it. Keira will phone me up. She's like, 'I'm thinking about doing it.' I'm like, 'I am, too, but don't do it.' And we'll kind of talk each other out of it." — Sienna Miller, on her friendship with Keira Knightley. [Mirror]
• "My mom thought it was cool that if you got a business card that said 'Taylor' you wouldn't know if it was a guy or a girl. She wanted me to be a business person in a business world." — Taylor Swift. [Rolling Stone]
• "That one kinda hurts, because I don't have any rights to participate in it at all. It was done at a time when I was dirt poor so I had to sell everything when I sold the script, so that one hurts a bit." — Wes Craven on the remake of Nightmare On Elm Street. [The Star]
• "The past year has obviously been very difficult for me. Yoga has really helped me turn it into a huge learning experience. I'm working hard to take what I went through and turn it into something positive. Yoga helps me focus." — Ashley Dupre, former call girl of former Governor Eliot Spitzer. [Page Six]
• "My feeling about the movies is that most of them are terrible. If you don't have a decent script and a decent director, forget it. That's why I thought the Benjamin Button movie was so encouraging. I'll forgive anybody anything if they have talent. What I find most disconcerting is that people in the profession are not creative but only interested in money, which is what this country is most about. It doesn't appreciate talent. … For eight years we had a moron in the White House who didn't even know what art meant." — Lauren Bacall. There are more quips in the interview! [Houston Chronicle]

• Instead of appearing at the Grammy Awards, Chris Brown - seen at left with Rihanna at a pre-Grammy party - was arrested for a felony battery.

He surrendered to the LAPD and then posted $50,000 bail. An "unidentified woman" who appeared to have been beaten identified Brown as her attacker. Rihanna did not show up at the Grammys either. [EW, Rolling Stone, People,TMZ]

• Sources say Rihanna's face is "slightly bruised." [ET]
• This report says Rihanna had "multiple bruises" and was in the hospital but has been released. [NY Daily News]
• Cops say that Chris Brown and "the woman" they are not identifying were arguing inside a vehicle after midnight on Saturday; they received a 911 call and when they arrived, they noticed that the woman had "visible injuries." Brown had left the scene by the time police arrived. [TMZ]
• The case is a felony and not a misdemeanor because of the visible injuries. [People]
• The argument took place in a rented Lamborghini after a pre-Grammy gala at the Beverly Hilton. [Fox 411]
• Rapper David Banner says: "One situation doesn't define a man and I really want American to stop doing that to people. As humans, none of us is perfect." Um, yeah, but. You don't hit women. [Rolling Stone]
• Apparently in 2007, Chris Brown told Giant magazine: "[My stepfather] used to hit my mom. He made me terrified all the time, terrified like I had to pee on myself. I remember one night he made her nose bleed. I was crying and thinking, 'I'm just gonna go crazy on him one day…' I hate him to this day." A family history of domestic violence? [Perez]
• Chris Brown's court date is March 5. [USA Today]
• Commenters on the EW boards claim Chris Brown hit Rihanna because he found out she gave him genital herpes, which she got from a backup dancer. Where are they getting their info? [EW]
• Oh, wait. From here. [All Hip-Hop]
• This blogger adds, "Why is all this foolishness taking place during Black History Month?" [All Hip-Hop]
• Meanwhile: Rihanna is looking for a bone marrow donor for a 5-year-old girl. [UPI]
• Uh-oh: Peaches Geldof and husband of six months, Max Drummey, have separated! To her credit, Peaches did say she didn't expect it to last forever. But maybe at least a year? [Daily Mail]
• Amy Winehouse is heading back to the UK after a long vacation in the Caribbean. She plans to present her lawyers with a "secret ex-file," detailing Blake Incarcerated's bad behavior. Ugly divorce countdown starts now! [News Of The World]
• Is there tension in the Beckham marriage as Victoria heads to New York fashion week alone? She reportedly wants to stay in the U.S.: "She feels out of place in Milan and gets frustrated by not being able to understand what they are saying." [Daily Mail]
• Whitney Houston sang at Clive Davis's pre-Grammy bash and sounded "incredible," E!'s Marc Malkin says. "Was she back to the days when she was in top high-note-hitting form? No, but close." [Yahoo News via E!]
• Usher had to cancel his performance at a pre-Grammy party due to a "serious injury in the family" — apparently his wife Tameka experienced complications from plastic surgery in Brazil. Yikes! [TMZ, People]
• A neurosurgeon from LA's Cedars-Sinai Medical Center is headed to South America to check on Usher's wife. [Access Hollywood]
• Jennifer Aniston's 40th birthday party took place Saturday night at her house in Beverly Hills. Aniston and John Mayer "danced and huddled close all night," and guests included Oprah Winfrey, Sheryl Crow, David Arquette and wife Courteney Cox Arquette, Tobey Maguire and wife Jen Meyer, Laura Dern, Kevin Nealon, and Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson. Aniston has some kind of pull in Hollywood: the police kicked all the paparazzi out of the neighborhood! [Yahoo News via E!]
• Lindsay Lohan was seen hanging out at a table behind Sam Ronson's DJ booth; while Sam worked, LL was drinking from bottles stashed under the table. LL would flirt with guys but bitch out any woman who came close. This report notes that LL looked "grossly skinny." [E!]
• Director McG says of Christian Bale's "blowup": "The film set is a passionate place, and it happens… It was just one of those moments. I think I can speak on all of our behalf that we've all gotten a little fired up. And if anybody would take that moment and take it out of context, it would seem very, very strange." [People]
• Beyoncé runs around two and-a-half miles every day and is "eating veg and drinking water" because her stylists — and her mom tell her when she's gained weight. As for the diet: "It's boring." [Mirror]
• Here's video of the Jessica Simpson performance in which "every song was a disaster" and she mumbled through the lyrics and talked through tears, if you really want to watch that kind of thing. [ONTD via TMZ]
• Since she is producing a teen TV show for Fox and has a movie in the works, Jennifer Lopez is "putting music on the back burner," which may be for the best. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Do we really believe that Leonardo DiCaprio wants girlfriend Bar Refaeli to be on the cover of Sports Illustrated's Swimsuit Issue because it will "piss off" Gisele Bundchen? [Page Six]
• Prince Harry and Paris Hilton were supposed to have a date? And the Prince canceled at the last minute? Did he come to his senses? Should we feel sorry for Paris? [Daily Mail]
• Eddie Murphy has been ordered to pay £35,000 a month until his daughter — whose mother is Mel B. — turns 18. That's a total of about £7million. Another Shrek sequel? Anyone? [Daily Mail]
• What's this? Emma Watson is nervous about kissing Rupert Grint, aka Ron Weasley, on screen? [Telegraph]
• Dave Grohl wore a white knot on the red carpet at the Grammys to show his support for gay marriage and marriage equality. Think we'll see 'em at the Oscars? [E!]
• A man was killed on Justin Timberlake's golf course in Tennessee Saturday in a freak accident involving a tree. [TMZ]
• Minutes into his act at a UK nightclub, rapper Coolio was pelted by plastic bottles and ice cubes. Coolio jumped into the crowd to fight some dudes but was dragged way by security. Not exactly a gangster's paradise… [The Sun]
• The new Dancing With The Stars cast has been revealed! Jewel and her husband, rodeo star Ty Murray, will compete against each other. The youngest contestant ever, 17-year-old Olympic gymnast Shawn Johnson will dance; and so will Julianne Hough and boyfriend Chuck Wicks; Maksim Chmerkovskiy and Karina Smirnoff; Belinda Carlisle; Denise Richards, former NFL star Lawrence Taylor; Lil' Kim; Jackass star Steve-O; Apple computer co-founder Steve Wozniak; actors David Alan Grier and Gilles Marini; and Access Hollywood co-host Nancy O'Dell. [People]
• Remember when Natalie Portman rapped on Saturday Night Live? Uncensored audio can be found here [ONTD]
• Hugh Grant and ex Jemima Khan are so, so back on. [Telegraph]
• Welcome Charlie Axel into the world; he's the first son for Tiger Woods and wife Elin. [AP]
• A reporter calls The International, Tom Tykwer's film starring Clive Owen and Naomi Watts, a "strange and beautifully made thriller." Tykwer is best known for his 1998 flick, Run Lola Run. [Salon]
• Robbie Williams has been visiting weird websites, stuff like government paranoia and UFOs. [Daily Mail]
• Original Buffy The Vampire Slayer Kristy Swanson and ice skating champ Lloyd Eisler got married on Saturday. This story notes that Swanson "lost 45 lbs. in time for her wedding with the help of The Medifast Diet and regular exercise, including martial arts, skipping rope and treadmill work." [People]
• A tell-all book about Sean "Diddy Combs" by a former aspiring rapper is called Dancing With the Devil: How Puff Burned the Bad Boys of Hip-Hop. It's self-published, naturally. [Page Six]
• Are you ready for a Tricky comeback? [Independent]
• "Straying Alive! Married Bee Gee Robin Gibb has baby with live-in housekeeper 26 years his junior." [Daily Mail]
• "I want to keep learning, I have no ego. I'm blessed to be on one of the great shows. I made a statement last year that I was going to aggressively pursue my acting career… I want to do some television." - Sean "Diddy Combs on his CSI: Miami gig. [The Star]
• Paradise Beach had improbable plot-lines. We were always in bikinis, even at funerals. And someone who was my brother ended up being my father and I pulled him – it was just insane." — Isla Fisher on her soap opera past, to GQ. [Daily Express]
• "Besides being in love with him, I'm his biggest fan. I think my fiancé is hilarious." — Isla Fisher on Sacha Baron Cohen. [Mirror]
• "I've decided I am going to start loving my backside because I don't know anyone who does that. And for my daughter, I want to be able to say to her, 'I love this.' [Young women] look at all of us, myself included, on these magazine covers and they think, 'My God, how does she get skin like that?' And I can tell you, I have so many blemishes under this make-up that have been so fabulously covered, I promise you. I did realise a few years ago that no one actually talks about this retouching thing. It's like a secret or something. I'm damned if it's going to be a secret any more. I really want these young women to know we don't look like this." — Kate Winslet. [Daily Mail]
• "I think I definitely want to go to college… I could always study drama. I think that would be really cool. There's always more you can learn. If I wanted to do something totally different, I love history." — Dakota Fanning. [Newsweek]
• "Sir Anthony Hopkins is in the recording studio with Amy Winehouse, and we are hoping that next week Sir Brad and all the Pitt family will be performing The Sound of Music at the Brit awards." — Mick Jagger, making jokes at the Baftas. [People]
• "It's so invasive. It's not like they're standing 100 feet away. They're in your face, not letting you walk, standing in the way when you're driving. It becomes a situation and it doesn't need to be." — Jessica Alba on the paparazzi. [The Star]
• "I got into a bit of hot water for what I said about Amy Winehouse and I still say it again. I'm an ex-drug addict and I don't take that kind of stuff lightly. It stayed in my body for 25 years and it could still happen to this young woman or other addicts who are fooling around with drugs, especially needles. I would hope that what happened to me does not happen to her." — Natalie Cole, who has Hepatitis C and is waiting for a kidney transplant, on Amy Winehouse. [Mirror]
• "Every time I go for an ultra scan the baby is like in crazy positions with legs star-shaped and stuff. It's not like in a baby position at all. I feel like he is used to base lines and beats and receptive to that, which is cute." — M.I.A. [Mirror]
• "I grew up in Nashville, Tennessee, and my parents taught me to respect my elders. We'd say things like 'yes, ma'am' and 'no, sir' to adults. But kids in Los Angeles don't do that. I've drawn the line at my children calling adults by their first names. I tell them they can call people 'Miss Shannon' or 'Miss Heather' but that using only the first name is too familiar. Maybe I'm just old-fashioned." — Reese Witherspoon. [Reader's Digest]
• "It's crazy for people to care about him having a bong hit. Nothing's the matter with it - I want to have a bong hit right now. Really, the message Phelps is giving is that you can smoke weed and still be at the top of your game." — Bill Maher. [Gatecrasher]
• "My split with Brad was the hardest thing I ever went through. But it made me strong, superhuman. Now I'm turning 40 and I'm very excited. When they say youth is wasted on the young, it's so true.'" — Jennifer Aniston. [Daily Mail]
• People have called me a sex symbol in the past, but it's very much an effort […] It's been important for me to just do something that's extreme — that really separates me from that public Joaquin Phoenix persona, whatever the fuck that is. Or maybe I'm just lazy." — Joaquin Phoenix on his new, grizzy, bearded "look." [The Sun]

• Britney is so freaked out about her world tour, she's been having panic attacks. A source says:

"She has been telling her doctor she feels under pressure and ill when she thinks about touring." Is it possible she needs a break? [The Sun]

• Joaquin Phoenix swears his rap career is not a joke: "There's not a hoax. Might I be ridiculous? Might my career in music be laughable? Yeah, that's possible, but that's certainly not my intention." [USA Today]
• Angelina Jolie doesn't watch her own movies: "There’s a film or two I haven’t seen. I don’t really like to watch movies. I love to watch Brad’s movies though." We knew something was wrong with her. [The Sun]
• Oh, but Angelina does say that Oscar night: "I'm rooting for Brad." Plus, these are her priorities, in case you are wondering: "I'd say kids first, kids, woman to Brad and then my work internationally and being a kind of ... trying to educate myself and trying to learn about the world and ... trying to do some good things while I'm alive." Acting is like, fourth, or whatever. [People]
• Guess who isn't happy that Madonna has been parading around town with a 22-year-old Brazilian model? Alex Rodriguez. Apparently, a source spills, "Madonna likes to be in control." Do tell! So, yeah. Jesus Luz is more attentive and Madge was never committed to A-Rod anyways. [Gatecrasher]
• Jennifer Hudson's lip-sync-y prerecorded Super Bowl "Star Spangled Banner" is available for download on iTunes. [E!]
• Chris Martin and Coldplay: Viva la lawsuit, from Joe Satriani. [Fox 411]
• Prince threw a "rowdy" party with a dance bash where his band did '70s and '80s covers, and after his guests did a huge Electric Slide, His Purpleness quipped, "Y'all done tore up my carpet. I'm never inviting y'all back." [USA Today]
• Victoria Beckham is in talks to be a judge on popular UK show The X Factor. If David indeed becomes a fulltime player for AC Milan, the whole family will be moving back across the pond, sigh. [Daily Mail]
• Uh, this report says there is "no truth" to the rumor that Victoria will join X Factor. [The Sun]
• Ashton Kutcher wrote a long-ass MySpace blog entry in which he attempts to explain his Twitter obsession: "Our intention in becoming more active on the web has been with the effort to connect to the community in an effort to create a greater bond with the amazing fans that we have adopted over several years." [Perez]
• By the by, even though it was reported by the National Enquirer that Ashton and Demi Moore would adopt, Demi says, "Don't ever believe what you read there." But what about the John Edwards love child??? [UPI]
• Sean "Diddy" Combs didn't want the cops to search him before entering a party in New York where Kobe Bryant and a bunch of basketball stars were in attendance. What would they have found? [Page Six]
• Mickey Rourke and Sean Penn: Ironed out their differences? [Page Six]
• Celebs are feeling the recession: America Ferrera will only have one house; Eva Longoria wore the same outfit twice; Britney is driving a Mitsubishi. [MSNBC Scoop]
• The dude from the Kooks dumped Mischa Barton and she is "heartbroken," poor thing. [The Sun]
• Jude Law plays a transvestite supermodel named Minx in an upcoming movie called Rage, and from the looks of this picture, he's fairly comfortable in eyeliner and a wig. [Daily Mail]
• Julian Lennon and Sean Lennon will not, repeat, not perform together at a UN event in NYC on February 26. [Fox 411]
• The Speed-the-Plow crew cancelled a recent taping of Theater Talk when they learned the Jeremy Piven stuff would be brought up. The Voice's Michael Musto says: "Duh." [Village Voice]
• Leona Lewis on her autobiography: "I’m doing a picture book. A picture speaks a thousand words and I’m a big fan of photography." [The Sun]
• Girls Gone Wild mogul Joe Francis has been released from federal custody and is on home detention. But doesn't that mean he can watch DVDs of Girls Gone Wild? [Reuters]
• Congrats to model Angie Everhart, who is pregnant with her first child. Baby daddy is "very nice" but not her boyfriend or anything. "It's nobody you know," she says. [E!]
• Blind item! "Which A-list action star is trying to fool fans with his new face-lift?" [Gatecrasher]
• Mariah Carey Valentine's Day e-cards are delightfully tacky! [Pop Dirt]
• The chick who is Tina Turner's dance captain sounds totally awesome and kick-ass. [The Star]
• The Newlywed Game is coming back to TV and Carnie Wilson will be the host. Whether she will say "make whoopie" remains to be seen. [AP]
• Some reject on American Idol ripped into Simon Cowell, saying: "You need to get some wardrobe. For somebody to be so rich, your pants are very, very cheap, with that cheap, very lame shirt you've got on." The Brit press calls it a "cheeky rant." [Daily Mail]
• The dude from The City changed his name and got a record deal. [Page Six]
• "I am a dad. I think it's probably the worst thing any parent could face, the abduction of a child. It really is. Death is preferable. There's no question of that." — Liam Neeson, star of Taken. [Mirror]
• "I've never met anybody with a higher sex drive than me ever in my entire life." — Mel B. [The Sun]

• Versace model Liskula Cohen is suing Google after a blogger called her a "skank" and "old hag." Cohen hopes the defamation suit will unmask the mudslinger. [New York Daily News]

• Kanye West might be releasing a Louis Vuitton sneaker. We wish he'd stop being so lamely mysterious. [The Life Files]
• Monique Lhuillier and Naeem Khan are the latest designers to jump on the non-runway-show Fashion Week bandwagon. Cause who wants to be the insensitive designer throwing a show in these times? We all know an uber-select show in a small room is the way to fix the economy! [WSJ]
• First Lady Carla Bruni, at least, will be at Paris Fashion Week. [WWD]
• So, if you beat Stuart Weitzman in ping pong (which you won't, because he does "finger aerobics" and keeps his custom paddle in a silver case) you win a bunch of his shoes. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Talk about rags to riches! Model Daniela Cott, "who stands 5ft 10ins tall and has emerald green eyes, was spotted two years ago as she sifted through rubbish on the streets of Buenos Aires." Yes, she was fashionably gaunt! [Telegraph]
• Miss Vermont, Ashley Ruth Wheeler, will be wearing a green gown to the Miss America Pageant. The earth-friendly eco-frock will be made from hemp, organic cotton and silk, and lace and beads made from organic materials. No word yet on the swimsuit. [UPI]
• A new bra, designed for older and disabled women, has replaced tricky hooks with magnets. A boon for their suitors, too! [Science Daily]
• Diddy is king of his castle: "I need some advance notice because when I'm at home I'm really likely just to hang totally loose. I really like to just walk around in my underwear...I get a little embarrassed when people drop by; I'm not really prepared."[VogueUK]
• Stephanie Seymour for Valentino - part of the much ballyhooed 'year of the classic supermodel' —looks pretty amazing. [Fashion Week Daily]
• At least they can't be accused of false advertising: a new counterfeit shopping mall in China sells only knock-offs. [Mirror]
• This grotesque Roberto Cavalli snakeskin-print MasterCard was "created for those who thrive upon excellence, elegance and quality." [The Life Files]
• Los Angeles' 7 Showroom was robbed of $300,000 worth of merchandise on New Year’s Day. [WWD]
• Toni Chorley, a promising young model dubbed "the new Twiggy" when she came on the scene, has died of Hodgkin's Lymphoma at just 23. [Daily Mail]
• In a welcome piece of good retail news, fast fashion chain New Look reports that their numbers are up. [FT]
• Skechers launches (presumably fug) clothing line for kids. Sorry, that was uncalled-for. [WWD]
• Alfred Shaheen, credited as the inventor of the Hawaiian shirt that swept the mid-century nation, has passed away at 86. Aloha! [Reason]
• Now they say the first American TopShop is opening in March. Whatever. Fool us twice...[New York]
• Peaches Geldof has chopped her hair. It must be said: looks good. [ElleUK]

• Apparently Thierry Mugler's doing Beyonce's tour costumes. This could go in one of two directions. [Style.com]
• Diddy: “I’m only about five minutes late because I was running around and spraying people." We think he's talking about his new "I Am King" fragrance — a monarch's gotta mark his territory! [WWD]
• Let's continue to pretend we have some impact on Michelle's inaugural gown selection and evaluate these choices. [Forbes]
• We kind of assumed it was confirmed, but yes! Katie Holmes for Miu Miu. She was shot by "Mert and Marcus," our new band name. [ElleUK]
• Not a trick question: what do moddles eat on Thanksgiving? Food! [New York]

• Extremely awesome Luella Bartlet wins "Designer of the Year" at British Fashion Awards. "Bartley is the mother of three children and lives in Cornwall with her surfer-fashion photographer partner, David Sims." Other honorees included milliner Stephen Jones, Burberry creative director Christopher Bailey, and photog Tim Walker. [Telegraph]
• Check out Luella's Spring line here. [VogueUK]
• And Jourdan Dunn upset Agyness for moddle honors! [New York]
• To add insult to injury, Agy and Lily Allen were strip-serached at Dubai airport! [The Sun]
• Meet the "Madison Avenue (Doll) House, a futuristic structure displayed from suspension hangers. It features four fully decorated floors, replete with miniature replicas of Calvin Klein apparel, accessories and home furnishings, from clothing to tabletop." [WWD]
• Talk of a SAG strike is bad news for the designers counting on awards season for a much-needed boost. [WWD]
• J. Crew is down 30% — but still better off than analysts expected! [The Street]
• About time: they say they're going to return to "more friendly price points for Spring." [WWD]
• Talbots posts a quarterly loss but hopes a new credit agreement will buoy them. [NY Times]
• Meanwhile, the Liz Claiborne slide continues as it's issued a "negative" rating. In case you're wondering, that's bad. [Crains]
• Glam David — designer Richie Rich — beats the Goliath who sued him to stop using the "Richie Rich" name after acquiring Heatherette. [Page Six Magazine]
• Lego fashion show considerably more awesome than real fashion show. [AdWeek]
• Ernest Sewn launches cheap room for the cash-strapped. [Fashionista]
• Black Friday looms extra-manic as stores play 'how low can you go?' [WWD]

• Diddy likens himself to Obama. Speaking of his new fragrance, "I Am King," he declares, "When you see Barack Obama, you see a strong, elegant black man and when people see my ad, it's almost like that's the trend." [WSJ]
• "Mr. Obama sometimes wears jeans, as he did for a rally on Oct. 28, but his jeans are the loose, jingle-the-change-in-your-pocket type. He belts them at the waist, and when he wears them with white sneakers and a windbreaker, one could almost say he had stolen the look from Jerry Seinfeld’s character on the television series." — Cathy Horyn. [NY Times]
• Meanwhile, Donna Karan is rarin' to dress Michelle. “It’s not about her clothes, it’s really about who she is, and her passion for children, culture and wellness. I’m hoping to get to work with them — it would be my dream. They are so committed to ideals that are much in alignment with mine.” [WWD]

• Rumor has it that Pamela Anderson will be in a Vivienne Westwood campaign! But before she gets too excited: it's set in a trailer park. [New York Magazine]
• The Crocs bubble has officially burst. [Reuters]
• Gwyneth breaks it down: "Personally, I like to stick to the classics in both my everyday life and in the evening. Whether I am going to meet friends for dinner, a cocktail party or a bigger event, the most classic of classics, the little black dress, never fails me. I have found a few great ones in all different price ranges and each has amazing versatility. It could be Zara, it could be Balenciaga, but a well-cut, well-proportioned black dress has gotten me through many a fashion crisis." She pairs them with my betes noires, booties and gladiator boots. [Goop]
• We're reserving judgment on the new Diane Von Furstenberg blog: "The blog will be updated daily and will include news, shots of new items, horoscopes, cultural advice, and personal photos and posts by the Diane herself." [Fashionista]
• Ed Westwick's K-Swiss ads further remind us that he is no Chuck Bass. [Just Jared]
• Tartan is back. Why? Because apparently "plaid equals happiness." The Times suggests "a plaid scarf over a checked shirt and a plaid sport coat, topped with a tweed driving cap." [New York Times]
• Comme des Garcons for H&M is here. Shop at your own risk. [Sassybella]
• Wall Street Journal guy discovers there is no warranty on running shoes. [WSJ]
• Teens are apparently unembarrassed to dress exactly like Gossip Girl characters. [Portfolio]
• Ew. Is Vuitton bringing back the Stephen Sprouse graffiti bag? [Fashionista]
• They're refusing to confirm that Madonna's their new spokestar. [WWD]
• Stuart Weitzman plays a lot of ping pong. [Fashion Informer]
• (designer) Sienna Miller, for her part, enjoys Monopoly. [WWD]
• Dior Homme goes all porn-y for their new campaign. [NY Magazine]
• Uniqlo sells the new bra top through profiling: "20- to 40-year-olds were filmed answering a range of questions, from their favorite food to what they liked about Uniqlo products, and the answers were then played on a microsite for like-minded women. Filtering criteria allowed visitors to find women of a similar height, weight and shape and see how they answered the questions." [AdAge]
• Simon Doonan gets Tom Brokaw to unveil the Barney's Christmas windows. "I wanted someone with a little bit of gravitas to cut the ribbon," quoth he. [Style.com]
• Perry Ellis is pessimistic. [WSJ]
• Urban Outfitters, at least, is up! [WSJ]
• Marc Jacobs: "I've had boyfriends who were media whores, and, God bless them, they were great people." [New York Post]

[New York, September 18. Image via INF]

• Sean Combs's new fragrance, "I Am King" will premiere as a Macy's exclusive in December. 'I Am King is a statement about all men,” said Combs, during an interview at his Bad Boy Entertainment offices in Manhattan. “We are all descendents of royalty — and if we carry ourselves and respect ourselves in that manner and believe in ourselves, then we are all kings." The new fragrance, he says, is "more about sophistication. It’s strong and also sexy, with an elegance and simplicity to it.” [WWD]
• More on how design chief Patrick Robinson is trying to make The Gap cool. Can't they just...you know, carry better clothes? [Business Week]
• Lydia Hearst says she's not like Paris Hilton, ruins it by calling herself a "supermodel." "Don't ever compare New York media heiress Lydia Hearst to Paris Hilton. "Remember: I am a supermodel and have the award to prove it, and she is a celebrity. There's no comparison." [Page Six]

• Oy. Armchair activists Benetton bring their usual brand of asinine commentary to the Beijing Olympics. "Benetton on Friday took out double-page advertising spreads in a number of leading news dailies worldwide, showing a Tibetan monk and a Chinese soldier praying face to face under the word 'Victims.'" They also show pictures of Sichuan earthquake victims (Benetton supports the Red Cross) and explain that their work “attempts to make a small contribution to dialogue and engagement between Tibetan and Chinese people." [WWD]
• Judge awards LVMH huge payout from Canadian counterfeiters. [WWD]
• Bollywood spawn makes like Hollywood spawn, launches clothing line. Riddhima Kapoor, daughter of well known Bollywood actors Neetu and Rishi Kapoor, has names her line"ARA"."My collection makes a girl look hot. It is sensual but, at the same time, it's not at all vulgar. You just have to be yourself in these clothes," [Hindustan Times]
• Philllips de Pury & Co are hosting an auction of "hip hop's crown jewels" including bling "sported by 50 Cent, Biz Markie, MC Lyte, Kanye West and the late Notorious B.I.G and Tupac Shakur." [Fashion Week Daily"]
• The popular kids aren't shopping either! Along with Hot Topic, Abercrombie and Fitch, American Eagle sales are down. [Wall Street Journal]
• Designers Amy Molyneaux and Percy Parker are dressing phones. "BlackBerry smartphones are now an integral part of everyday life, so it's great to be given the opportunity to add some extra glamour to the way in which they can be carried," explain the design duo, who have taken inspiration from BlackBerry's magenta, silver and midnight blue colour palette."We've taken the stunning colours from the new summer range and really brought them to life through our pouch design. The combination pouch and handset will make even the most stylish fashionista stand out." [VogueUK]
• Andre 3000 has made it. Into The Sartorialist. [The Sartorialist]
• Polo profits up. I guess the rich are different! [WWD]
• And Ralph Lauren is sensitive about his age. [WWD]
• The same people who let all those fashionistas DJ are now letting them make films. "The aim of the project is to give stars of the fashion world the opportunity to show off their clothes and the spirit of their label in any way they see fit. Among the line-up of participants are Pierre Hardy, Peter Jensen, Todd Lynn and Rodarte. Each designer has produced a film between 30 seconds and three minutes long - and judging from the stills that we've seen each promises to be quite a spectacle." [ElleUK]
• Reebok is teaming up with toy co. Hasbro to launch a Monopoly sneaker. I want the thimble. [Fashionista]

In fact, Rihanna's celebrity was built on the backs of advertisers: before "Umbrella" hit airwaves, the people at Totes got their mitts on it. They had the foresight to realize that it was going to be a hit, but "Rihanna and her representatives wanted Totes to do more, however, than merely use her to peddle a product. They wanted Totes to create customized umbrellas featuring sparkly fabrics and glittery charms on the handles — all recommended by the emerging star and her team. Totes also guaranteed the singer a percentage of the sales of the umbrellas." But in addition to her deal with Totes, Rihanna has branding deals with CoverGirl, Nike, J. C. Penney, Nokia and Fuze. In fact, Rihanna has so many marketing deals, she and her handlers are holding back now that she's an honest-to-goodness celebrity.

But when every brand has a celebrity endorsing it, the famous faces can start to cancel each other out, especially since now advertisers are starting to reach down into the depths of dubious fame to push product. Case in point: this commercial with Lauren Conrad and Brody Jenner for the LG Shine cell phone. With Rihanna pushing Nokia, Justin Long shilling iPhones, and David Beckham hawking the RAZR, how can Brody and L.C.'s obscure ad hope to register with consumers? Well if ad exec Steve Stoute is correct, there's room in this country for celebrities of all stripes to whore out. Stoute mentions an SUV painted a particular shade of blue. "That’s Jay-Z blue! We invented a color!" Stoute tells the Times. "There are no limits. There is no such thing as too far.” Filthy lucre for all!

Nothing Sells Like Celebrity [NYT]
Everything Seemingly Is Spinning Out Of Control [AP via Yahoo via The Doree Chronicles]

• Sean Combs wants to work on a fashion line with David Beckham. But he can't. Because Becks is already working on a sneaker line with Snoop Dogg! [Fashionista]
• Diddy also harasses mom-and-pop cufflink site "Cuff Daddy" for name infringement. Busy man! [TMZ]
• Memories of fashion icon YSL. [NY Times]
• Console yourself by reading about Christian Lacroix who, as a creepy drunk at a bar recently put it, " is not half-stepping either." [WWD]
• CFDA Awards! Francisco Costa of Calvin Klein takes top honors.[WWD]

• In a radical departure from its usual policy of democratic inclusiveness, Chanel excises B-listers from store opening pics. [TMZ]
• Jaime Pressly's fashion line (?!), J'aime, shafts wholesaler, is sued. [TMZ]
• "Graffiti Legend Shepard Fairey" launches morally problematic, hipster jewelry line. [Fashionista]
• Nicole Miller is apparently Cyndi Lauper's "Personal Couturier." [W Magazine]
• Carrie Bradshaw shills for Brazil, nets $600,000. [Fashionista]
• Well, thank God: Tory Burch is launching a perfume. [NY Mag]
• Zac Posen channels "retro country club!" [WWD]
• In an especially rad symbiosis, Steven Alan signs on to design a line for Urban Outfitters. [NY Mag]
• Pantene hangs a huge Rapunzel braid from a third-story window to publicize anti-breakage shampoo. [Fashion Week Daily]
• And in obligatory possibly-balding Naomi Campbell news: she may or may not get pregnant. Some day. [NY Mag]
• Also, pays tribute to YSL, self. [Vogue UK]

• Angelina Jolie confirms: She is having twins. You knew that, right? Anyway an exclusive interview scored by NBC's Today show was lifted by NBC's Access Hollywood and now NBC producers are pissed at each other. [Page Six]
  
• It was Jack Black who spilled the beans about Angie's twins, actually. [People]
  
• Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo might still be together. Unfortunately, that's not as interesting as if they were broken up. [E!]
  
• Um, more Britney pregnancy rumors. I'm scared. Someone hold me. [Mirror]
  
• Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty kissing. This is one of those pictures where obviously the buss was on the cheek but it kind of looks like they were heading for the lips. In any case, the paper calls them a "gruesome twosome." [Mirror]
  
• To be honest, Pete's got something weird on his lip and face. It is kind of gruesome. [The Sun]
  
• Meanwhile, Blake Incarcerated says Amy Winehouse will die without him, but he doesn't want to go back to her when he gets out of jail because she is doing drugs. [News.com.au]

• Madonna's court adoption ruling has been delayed. The judge needs to review some paperwork. [Reuters]
• Mariah Carey's ex-boyfriend, producer Mark Sudack, whom she was with for almost four years, is "shattered" that MC is suddenly married to someone else. He and Mariah just broke up in the beginning of 2008. [MSNBC]
• Fantasia was a "trainwreck" on American Idol. [Perez Hilton]
• Sean "Diddy" Combs is looking for sponsors for his Cannes yacht party. Any takers? [Mirror]
• Actress Michelle Trachtenberg (Buffy, Gossip Girl) fainted in the middle of a downtown NYC party. But! Homegirl rallied and stayed out the rest of the night. That's how Georgina Sparks would do it! [Page Six]
• Rumor has it Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz will be getting married this weekend in a seven-figure ceremony. Friends and family were notified via Evites, haha. The good news is they were apparently made for each other; a source says: "Ashlee is so needy, she just hangs all over Pete. But he loves it. He's always had a thing for vulnerable girls...They complete each other." [Rush & Molloy]
• Blind item! "Which young actress may be a little too much like her TV character? At a wrap party for her show, the tween got totaled at the bar and had to crawl into a waiting taxi." [Rush & Molloy]
• Anne Heche's show, Men In Trees, was canceled and now she can't afford to pay child and spousal support. Unemployment sucks. [People]
• Halle Berry has a new diamond ring! On her ring finger. But it's not from her baby daddy. She bought it for herself. So very modern. [People]
• Star Jones is "sexy, single and heating up the Cannes Film Festival." Wait, what? [ET]
• The Season 3 finale of Flavor of Love is the show's finale episode. Ever. It's the end of the series. Well, we'll always have Under One Roof. Ugh. [UPI]
• A contestant on Australia's Next Top Model came close to a nervous breakdown from being bullied by the other girls in the house. [News.au.com]
• Hugh Grant, Liz Hurley and her husband Arun Nayar won £58,000 in damages for invasion of privacy over photographs taken of them on holiday. That's enough cash for another trip! [BBC News]
• Superbad star Jonah Hill in a modern-day 21 Jump Street? Dude is no Johnny Depp. Or Peter DeLuise, for that matter. [Variety]
• A hybrid car was flown from Japan to Paul McCartney in London and critics are saying that any environmental benefits from using the car would be undermined by its mode of delivery. Sigh. [Guardian]
• Sean Penn lit up two cigarettes at the Cannes Film Festival, in violation on French laws against smoking in public buildings. Badass! [USA Today]
• The ladies of Sex And The City are on the cover of Entertainment Weekly, because they have not had enough publicity lately. [Just Jared]
• Oprah's dead dogs, commemorated in sculpture and sitting on her head. [TMZ]
• PETA still hates Mary-Kate Olsen. [Peta2]
• James McAvoy in Mean magazine: Hot. [ONTD]
• "I put on 40 pounds with Moses. And I found it really hard to loose the last 20 pounds. I didn't mind having the big boobs. But it was the stomach roll, the back fat, and the post-pregnant butt. And it was so hard to get rid of." — Gwyneth Paltrow. [People]
• "Samantha, she's Aphrodite. She loves them and leaves them. She has no guilt about her desires. If I'm associated with sexuality until the day I die I'll be happy — because I intend to be sexual until the day I die." — Kim Cattrall on her Sex And The City character. [The Sun]
• "When I see pictures [of myself] I do sometimes think, 'You miserable cow!'" — Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham. [Mirror]

• Lindsay Lohan will appear on SIX EPISODES of Ugly Betty, including the season finale. LL will play an old classmate of Betty's who is down on her luck. Naomi Campbell, Christian Siriano, Victoria Beckham and now Lindsay? It's official: Ugly Betty is the new Love Boat. [TMZ]
  
• Oooh, Lindsay's mugshot is being used in a drunk driving ad. [Reuters]
  
• Courtney Love was in the hospital over the weekend; homegirl has strep throat! Stay away. (Not that you needed a warning.) [Mirror]
  
• Thirty guests attended Jamie Lynn Spears's baby shower in Kentwood, LA on Saturday and big sis Britney was one of them. The ladies sat in a circle and opened gifts and nothing scandalous happened, yawn. [People]
  
• Britney hadn't been in her hometown since early 2007. Bet she misses some Southern cooking. [People]
  
• Miley Cyrus appeared at the Disney Channel Games concert Saturday night and thanked fans, saying: "Thank you guys for all your support. Without you, none of this would be possible. I love every one of you and I could not be more appreciative. God bless you." Then she took her top off. Kidding! [People]

• Boo! Amy Winehouse has backed out of recording the theme for the new James Bond flick because she's not ready to work. Also: Nothing rhymes with Quantum of Solace. [Variety]
• But! Amy will duet with Pete Doherty at a gig at Royal Albert Hall. Which sounds um, healthy? [Mirror]
• The nanny who is accusing Rob Lowe of sexual harassment also babysits for Shanna Moakler, whom you may know from the MTV show Meet The Barkers, as she is Travis Barker's ex-wife. [People]
• Oscar nominee Judy Davis is suing a Sydney newspaper over an article that implies she is a child-hating selfish hypocrite. The thing is, she doesn't want floodlights on a soccer field near her waterfront home. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• Dina Lohan to Jill Zarin of The Real Housewives of New York: "I don't watch TV. Especially reality shows." Haha bet you will when yours starts airing! [Rush & Molloy]
• Kim Kardashian: Seen going for a laser cellulite treatment... With camera crews in tow, of course! A butt that famous needs lots of attention and tender loving care. [Rush & Molloy]
• Blind item! "Which newly minted TV star is a pushover who already looks ready for rehab? At an L.A. party, the actor was mocked into doing a bunch of shots, despite protesting numerous times that he had to drive that night." [Rush & Molloy]
• Lily Allen spent £300 at a nail salon last week but neglected to tip her technician, tsk tsk! [Mirror]
• Sean "Diddy" Combs was honored with a star on the Walk of Fame in Hollywood on Friday; his mom, kids and baby mama Kim Porter were all in attendance — and dressed to match. [Concrete Loop]
• Avril Lavigne has laryngitis and has canceled or postponed most of her tour. Get a refund, people! [People]
• Dinner with Erykah Badu is up for auction! The proceeds go to the African American Museum in Dallas. [UPI]
• Gary Dourdan is "embarrassed" about his arrest situation. But the luggage in his car with all the drugs wasn't his and the reason he pulled over and cops found him sleeping in his car was because he didn't want to drive while drunk. So there's that. [People]
• Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes gave the Beckhams a wine tasting trip to Napa Valley for their birthday; Seal and Heidi Klum and Kate Beckinsale and Len Wiseman also came along. Hot couples wandering through the grapevines? Sounds like the opening scene of a very classy porn film. [Mirror]
• A woman is scheduled to testify at R. Kelly's upcoming child pornography trial, and will reveal that she had a threesome with R. and the allegedly underage girl in the infamous video. Wait, wouldn't that be a crime, too? Oh, the woman was also underage when she had the threesome. Great. And by great I mean awful. [TMZ]
• A Sting charity concert was meant to raise money for the rain forests, but less than half of the show's profits actually went to the cause. "What are they doing with the money?" the Better Business Bureau asked. Good question. [UPI]
• Orlando Bloom: Seen out drinking sake with a buddy instead of attending a fashion show where his girlfriend Miranda Kerr was in the front row. [News.com.au]
• Elle Macpherson is moving from London to her homeland of Australia. [News.com.au]
• Country star Gretchen Wilson, 34, passed her GED exam in April and will don a cap and gown and finally graduate from high school on May 15. Better late than ever! [AP]
• "I came to grips with my bum. Before, I always tied a shirt around my waist when I went for a run. It was ridiculous. I finally told myself, 'I'm not doing this anymore — I have nothing to hide.' I've got some curves, I've got a bubble butt, but I don't mind, because it's what powers me forward when I run." — Elisabeth Hasselebeck. [Page Six]
• "Unfortunately for certain media outlets, you will never be able 2 'Michael Jackson' me. That means 2 make it seem like everything I do is so weird or out of place... they always try 2 make it seem like everything is about my ego! That joke is getting old. At a certain point you have 2 respect that I'm one of the last artist that still cares about the fans having the best time of there lives!" —Kanye West. [Perez Hilton]
• Iron Man made $100 million? This country confuses me. [E!]

The Good:
Robert Downey, Jr. and his wife Susan look like an old-time glamor couple from the Hollywood of yore.

Ben Stiller looks sharp in his dark suit (even if he's almost doing "Blue Steel" here) and Christine Taylor rocks the naught secretary look.

Whoah: It's Billy Corgan. He can wear whatever the fuck he wants. Especially when it involves a stripey shrirt, cropped pants, and a hat.

Emmanuelle Chirqui makes it okay to wear white after Labor Day.

No one puts Baby in the corner.

Leslie Bibb makes the one-shoulder dress look completely novel, not to mention sexy-yet-classy.

Nazanin Boniadi's dress has to be Rami Kashou, right?!

Sean Combs must be giving his outfit for this year's White Party a partial test-run.

The Bad:

Gwyneth Paltrow is wearing a jumper. How Studio 54 of her.

Beau Bridges and Wendy Treece: Did they just step out of a time machine? I know I saw these looks at my cousin's Bat Mitzvah in 1989.

Jenna Dewan's dress has good ideas. But something went terribly wrong in its execution.

I really have no patience for Pete Wentz and his "style." Also, is that a sweater vest I spy?

Same goes for Terrence Howard. But minus the sweater vest. Also, shouldn't he be carrying baby wipes?

Just not Vince Vaughn's finest hour.

The Ugly:
Oh blah blah blah I know that Jack Black is supposed to be all wacky and such, but he and wife Tanya Haden look like they're wearing their dirty laundry. From their time in the house-cleaning circus.

Courtney Hansen's dress is so wrong on so many different levels. But the shiny, too-tight booby trap up top and the piecemeal bottom seem to be the most insurmountable problems.

No, seriously: What is Rosanna Arquette wearing?

[Images via Getty.]

• Seriously? The White House Correspondents dinner must not be what we think it is, because Pamela Anderson, Lauren Conrad and Perez Hilton (and Donatella Versace) are invited. [ONTD]
  
• Newly-engaged Ashlee Simpson says her sister Jessica is "overflowing with joy" and dad Joe has given her and fiancé Pete Wentz his blessing. [People]
  
• Lily Allen was kicked out of the men's room at a club in London — and she was with Razorlight singer Johnny Borrell. [Mirror]
  
• Kate Hudson on PhotoShopping: "I just tend to let those things go. I can't tell you how many covers of magazines I've been on when my eyes were blue. I don't have blue eyes. I have green eyes. So, you just kind of go with it, you know, it's like it is, what it is and that's what people do, you know." [The Star]
  
• A tabloid editor says Jay-Z and Beyoncé's wedding only made the cover of one weekly magazine because "African-Americans don't sell covers." [Gatecrasher]

• "Just good friends" Chris Brown and Rihanna were seen "hugging and dancing" at a birthday party. [Page Six]
• Madonna is expected to appear in court in Malawi in 2 weeks for a final ruling on her adoption. We all know it's gonna happen, right? She's had that kid since 2006. [Reuters]
• An Indian pandit — which is like some kinda spiritual teacher — will travel to Mexico to bless Heidi Klum and hubs Seal on their third wedding anniversary, May 10. Damn, they're so international! [Times Of India]
• Paul McCartney is going on a huge world tour in the fall, and the always-classy UK papers are calling it the "divorce tour." [Mirror]
• Heather Mills said of Paul on morning TV: "I think he's got three different girlfriends so I wish all the girls the best of luck. Better them than me." [Mirror]
• Paula Abdul's boyfriend "isn't too invested" in the relationship and "flirts with a lot of women." [MSNBC]
• Gwyneth Paltrow's mom, Blythe Danner, is swearing up and down that Gwynnie and Chris Martin are happily married. [People]
• Neil Patrick Harris doesn't want Britney back on How I Met Your Mother. "Our show does not need stunt casting in order to succeed," he says. [USA Today]
• That nude photo of Carla Bruni — shot by photographer Michel Comte in 1993 — sold for $91,000, [Guardian]
• Dolly Parton helped a young American bald eagle that had been blown from its nest return to the wild. She named the bird Liberty. "I thought that sounded better than Baldy." [Yahoo News]
• "It doesn't matter how much I get paid for something. Having integrity definitely hurts your buying sprees, but I can sleep at night." —Evan Rachel Wood. [LA Times]
• At the casting for Paris Hilton's new TV show — in which she searches for a "new BFF" — took place yesterday in New York. "It looked like Barbie threw up in there," says a source. "All the girls looked like versions of Donatella Versace. They all had bleached blond hair, too-dark tans and were wearing tight, shiny dresses. All the guys that were there were gay. The whole thing was so bizarre." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which rising young actress was informed at a recent film party that Jane Fonda wanted to meet her? "I don't give a shit," came the jaded response." [Gatecrasher]
• Alright stop. Collaborate and listen: Robert Van Winkle, better known as Vanilla Ice, was arrested last night for domestic battery. Apparently he had an argument with his wife and pushed her. [TMZ]
• Sean Diddy Combs needed five stitches after cutting his foot on a champagne glass while partying at his Miami home last weekend. Raise your hand if you want to be barefoot and sipping champagne ASAP. [TMZ]
• Ed Asner to ex-wife: Get a job. [USA Today]
• The 73-year-old 3 foot 8 inch actor who played R2D2 in Star Wars has been hospitalized. May the force be with him. [TMZ]
• OMFG have you seen the new Gossip Girl ad? [TMZ]

• Photographs of Angelina Jolie's (now) unborn babies could be worth a whopping $10 million. An editor who remains anonymous actually says: "It's at the point now where some stars might decide to have more kids just to collect the money from their photos." Hahahahahaha. No. [Page Six]
  
• By the by, People's issue with La Lopez twins sold between 2 and 3 million copies; Nicole Richie's cover sold 1.8 million; Christina Aguilera's sold 1.3 million. [ONTD]
  
• Russell Simmons and wife Kimora have filed for divorce — again. He filed in March 2006, but the proceedings never um, proceeded. In any case, since they have such intertwined careers and businesses, this should be interesting. [TMZ]
  
• They secretly went out two years ago, and now Matthew Perry has rekindled his relationship with Mean Girls actress Lizzy Caplan (she played Janis Ian). She's 13 years younger than he is and it's a "friends with benefits" type thing. [Janet Charlton's Hollywood]
  
• Tina Fey wants Ashley Dupre, aka Kristen, to be on 30 Rock. A skit involving Jack? Or Kenneth? [Page Six]
  
• Here's video of Ashley Dupre telling a Girls Gone Wild cameraman that she is over 18 and her name is Amber Arpalo. [TMZ]

• A jeweler says Jamie Lynn Spears' engagement ring is "very 1980s, with a yellow gold band." Aw, give the kid a break, she's 16! [E!]
• Ready, set, go: Patrick Dempsey will make an appearance Saturday at Gainsco Grand Prix of Miami at Homestead-Miami Speedway. [Miami Herald]
• Lily Allen introduced a clip on a BBC3 program: "It's my favourite. It's kegging, pulling someone's trousers down in public. Childish but very funny." Since the video showed a student pulling down a teacher's pants, the schoolboard people and Association of Teachers and so on are all apoplectic. [Mirror]
• The Diddy/Tupac kerfluffle that surfaced last week was an elaborate hoax cooked up by an "overweight white kid from Florida." LOL. [Page Six]
• The L.A. Times has apologized for using the forged documents in a story implicating Diddy in the Tupac assault. Their bad! [Yahoo News]
• Tommy Lee received a tattoo on a flight to Miami, helping the tattoo artist set a Guinness World Record. Uh, ink+needle+turbulence=disaster! [Page Six]
• There is a load of fake Heath Ledger memorabilia on the market, buyer beware. [News.com.au]
• Richie Sambora could face charges of child endangerment after being busted on a DUI charge Tuesday with his 10-year-old daughter Ava in the car. Cops say the vehicle was "weaving within lanes" before it was stopped and that Sambora had alcohol on his breath and failed all the field sobriety tests. [Rush & Molloy]
• One day after Dita Von Teese sued an adult-oriented trade show, claiming they owed her $50,000, they have paid up. Justice! [TMZ]
• An inquest has begun into the death of Corinne Bailey Rae's husband, who died Saturday of an apparent drug overdose. Jason Rae, 31, was a Scottish-born sax player whom Corinne (now 29) met in a jazz club where she worked as a coat-check girl. They got married in 2001. [People]
• David Beckham played a historic soccer, ahem, football match last night: He represented the England national team for the 100th time, becoming only the 5th player to ever reach the triple figure. Score! [People]
• Boxing champ and Dancing With The Stars alum Laila Ali is preggers! Her hubs is former NFL star Curtis Conway; he has three kids already but this is her first. Congrats! [People]
• Olivia Newton-John will walk the Great Wall of China for 21 days, in an effort to raise funds for cancer research. Good luck! [E!]
• Jessica Lange denies she had plastic surgery, despite a report in the National Enquirer. Well, now we need to see pictures. [Star Tribune]
• Artist Jeff Koons is being sued for overdue child support; he's failed to pay about $2.3 million, according to his ex-wife, La Cicciolina, an Italian porn star. [Reuters]
• Brooke Shields is having surgery on her foot — an old dance injury. Ow. [Page Six]
• How do we feel about Josh Brolin playing George W. Bush in the biopic directed by Oliver Stone? [Rush & Molloy]

• Listen to Heidi Montag's earsplittting new single, "No More," at your own risk. It sounds like this: You said I was the reason why we couldn't work out but it was all a lie...Ar ar ar ai ai ah ah blah dah dah, except in like, dolphin language. [People]
  
• Lindsay Lohan reportedly left a series of phone messages for Calum Best that were all, "I can't believe you would ever fucking do this to me, I should have listened to everyone. I should never have fucking trusted you." Hey Linds! Didja hear? That's not you in the BJ clip! [The Sun]
  
• A judge is upholding the conservatorship of Britney Spears, despite some random lawyer's appeal. [Yahoo News]
  
• Britney kept her sunglasses on during rehearsals for How I Met Your Mother. Very professional. [MSNBC]

• A source says the role was very carefully chosen and avoided "trigger" topics like her music career and her kids. "They just wanted her to be treated normally, but obviously this wasn't a normal situation. This wasn't about her career, it was about her health." [MSNBC]
• Ooh, Britney revelations via Henry Rollins! Yeah, that's right, Henry Motherfucking Rollins! Henry sez: "They have the black chick come in and sing, and Britney sings over it, and they mix them together. (Britney) gets her phrasing basically from this older R&B woman. I found that out talking to an engineer. Britney apparently isn't actually the worst singer, she just has no feel. So they bring in this older black woman who sings the song, then Britney sings to it, and they kind of make a mix of the two voices, and that's what you hear on the records." [Dlisted]
• Cashmere Mafia: Dunzo? And Lipstick Jungle coming back? Is anyone watching either show? [Page Six]
• A dude named David K. Zandi is lobbying to star in Prince of Persia: Sands of Time, a Disney flick based on a video game. Actors up for the role include Orlando Bloom, Milo Ventimiglia and Zac Efron but Zandi says "people are fascinated that a real Persian with royal lineage could be hired to play this role." And by people he means himself. Anyway, Disney is all LOL. [Page Six]
• Grey's Anatomy star Justin Chambers had a vasectomy after he and his wife had their 5th child. But! The couple would consider adopting! Are they battling Angelina for kiddie supremacy? [Page Six]
• Weekly mag editors find Ashton Kutcher's show, Pop Fiction and the fake news it's trying to peddle (Avril's pregnancy, Paris' guru) in a word, yawn. [Rush & Molloy]
• Nude photo of Carla Bruni, aka French First Lady, up for auction! [Rush & Molloy]
• Allen Covert, who has co-starred in a dozen movies with Adam Sandler, was arrested on the set of his latest Sandler film when he spat and slapped a paparazzo he thought was filming his kid. [TMZ]
• The family of Bob Marley will not allow his music to be in a Weinstein Co. film, even though Rita Marley is an executive producer on the project. But Martin Scorsese is set to direct a documentary on Bob, which would be allowed to use his music, according to Ziggy. [TMZ]
• Dancing With The Stars alum Sara Evans went through a very public divorce battle last year but won't let that stop her from getting engaged to a former University of Alabama quarterback. Congrats. [People]
• Milo Ventimiglia has a YouTube account in which you can see videos of Milo brushing his teeth and whatnot. Gripping! [People]
• The Smashing Pumpkins are suing Virgin Records for illegally using their name and music in promotional deals. Did anyone know the Smashing Pumpkins were still around? [Yahoo News]
• Sean Diddy Combs has settled a lawsuit brought by a man who claims the rapper punched him outside of a Hollywood hotel, but the terms of the deal are unknown. [Yahoo News]
• Denise Richards, who was legally known as Denise Sheen, is changing her name back to Denise Richards. Don't these people have anything better to do than go to court? [Yahoo News]
• Heather Mills once claimed she'd been offered a title, Baroness Mills; a new TV documentary calls bullshit on that. [Mirror]
• Ice T and Coco have a sex secret called The Stroke that you can feel free to read more about if you care to. [The Sun]
• Amy Winehouse has been offered £350,000 to perform at a Dutch club that is "in the heart of the biggest drug circuit in Holland." Oh, dear. Sing, take the money and run! [The Sun]
• Pete Doherty was seen visiting Amy's house with hands that looked like they "hadn't been washed for a week." Such lovely imagery this morning! [The Sun]