• Russell Simmons may be vegan but admits, “my clothes are not especially animal-friendly." [BlackBook]
• In a somehow perfect/distasteful marriage, Gwen Stefani and L.A.M.B. will be designing the uniforms for W Hotel employees. [Portfolio]
• We've been burned by Target's accessories collabs before, but hopes are running high for the Sigerson Morrison-Anya Hindmarch double whammy! Pics! [FabSugar]
• Some dick crashes the shows at Fashion Week; heckles; makes racist jokes; kills. [NYC The Blog]
• Baby Dior. 'Nuff said. [The Life Files]

• Phew! Lydia Hearst's kidney stones won't be keeping her off the runway: the "leggy trooper" is determined to walk. [NY Post]
• Marc Jacobs enjoys the freedom of kilts: "I was just recently fascinated by the whole men-in-skirts controversy of the nineties. No. I got one and I started wearing it and it made me happy, so I bought more. And now I just can't stop wearing them." [NY Post]
• NPR discovers that people are interested in political fashion. [NPR]
• Which is good, cause apparently there's a political tee "arms race" afoot! "A search on the site for Sarah Palin already yields more than 2,500 results. John McCain gets about 9,000, and Barack Obama about 20,000 (Joe Biden paraphernalia is in very short supply.)" [LA Times]
• Kate Moss has cut her hair. [ElleUK]
• Agyness deep-conditions her newly-bobbed coif. "Yeah… or else they’d fall out! Because I bleach them. I go to Laurie Foley." [Elle]
• And if this makes you admire Agyness enough to totally trivialize the election, why, you can wear a political button supporting her "candidacy!" "Modelinia.com created these buttons with slogans like “Vote for the Stam,” “Cast a Tally for Ally,” and “Coco 2008,” all for the week’s most popular models to match this year’s political theme." [Fashion Week Daily]
• Fast Fashion Cheat Sheet. [Esquire]
• Laetitia Casta is the face of "Notorious," Ralph Lauren's newest women's fragrance. [UPI]
• WHEN WILL TOP SHOP NEW YORK OPEN? STOP TAUNTING US! [NY Mag]
• Monique Lhuillier's fashion week caffeine consumption: "I've been getting between four to seven hours of sleep, and I've been drinking 4 cups of coffee on average during show prep. Normally, I barely have one!" [Elle]
• Model Miranda Kerr's mom may be a savvy business manager but, "We talk every day and she texts me every time she gets on a plane and lands again to say she's safe. It's important for our peace of mind. She's still our only little girl." [News.com.au]
• To appeal to European women, Nike swaps the aggressive "Just Do It" for the vague "Here I Am." [WSJ]
• Fashionistas talk recession: Says one critic, "I don't think enough designers are thinking about it. The clothes we've seen so far have been embroidered and beaded or very elaborate, and they only mean something to the top one-thousandth percent of the population." [Slate]
• Irina Lazareanu is giving Fashion Week a pass to work on this alleged "album with Sean Lennon" that's been in the works since they were a couple. [WWD]
• No one knows what to make of the new trend in shiny happy moddles. [IHT]
• Hey, want a $1,000 tote bag? "To mark Vanity Fair’s Campaign New York, Lambertson Truex teamed up with artist Donald Baechler to create a limited edition tote. The bag features a print that is the background of one of Baechler’s paintings." Oh, well in that case! [WWD]
• That Blahnik that Big proposed to Carrie with is selling at Bergdorf's. For $945. Manolo will be there to autograph said shoes. The sad thing is, you just know they're gonna fly. [NY Times]
• Yoga outfitter Lululemon beats the recession blues. [WWD]

• Michael Phelps will host the season premiere of Saturday Night Live. Um, swimming skits? Will you watch if he's not bare-chested? Just asking. [Yahoo News]
• Lindsay Lohan responds to the stuff her dad's been saying: "He’s out of control. I want him to stop hurting and talking to the media about the people I love." [Perez Hilton]
• Sam Ronson responds to LL's dad too: "i really don't want to say anything because i feel like he wins- he, being the man who is so desperate for attention that he goes to the media whenever possible… i am not the reason that he has no contact with his daughter… i feel no need to publicly defend my role in lindsay's life… i'm just sorry that she likes me more than him… i'm not the one that is so lost that i need to use my relationship with lindsay to earn a living…" There's more! [Perez Hilton]
• Hilary Duff's dad was sentenced to 10 days in jail for contempt of court for violating a court order that prohibited him from selling off assets without the consent of his estranged wife, Susan. Susan was requesting $25,000 to celebrate Hilary's 21st birthday (9/28), and pretty much calling Bob Duff a deadbeat dad for not paying up. On one hand, surely Hilary has her own cash? On the other hand, a father has to do what a father is legally obligated to do. He was taken from the courtroom in handcuffs… [Yahoo News]

• No Britney at the MTV Awards? "Contrary to media reports, Britney was never slated to perform on this year's VMAs," Brit's manager, Larry Rudolph, says. "She's in the middle of recording her next album, which is going amazingly well, and her focus remains on the studio." So why was she in the commercials with Russell Brand and an elephant? Is this an elaborate ruse? [AP]
• Ladies, listen up: Gerard Butler likes women to make the first move. "I am for equal opportunities. Why should it be the guy's job to kiss? If a woman wants to kiss she should totally do that. I think it is awesome when women take the lead. I love that idea." Oh and click the link to see a very nice (and by nice I mean shirtless) pic. [ONTD]
• Woody Allen had dinner with Jennifer Aniston. Could she replace Scarlett Johansson as his new film muse? [Yahoo News]
• Solange Knowles: "I have to say, that was not a very professional introduction before. Please don’t tie me into family and my brother-in-law’s establishment." News anchor: "That wasn't live, Solange. That wasn't on live TV." Yes, there is video. [Just Jared]
• Kate Moss naked in Interview magazine. [The.Life Files]
• Britney may not be at the MTV awards, but Katy Perry will be. And MTV producers are looking for a lady she can kiss while she sings, "I Kissed A Girl." They want Lindsay Lohan. Think it's gonna happen? [E!]
• Salma Hayek's ex-fiancé and baby daddy, billionaire heir François-Henri Pinault, has a new ladyfriend, equestrian Virginie Couperie. Here are pictures of them enjoying a "saucy holiday romp in Tuscany." The ONTD commenters have proclaimed Virginie a "downgrade." [Rush & Molloy]
• Naomi Campbell's beau, Russian billionaire Vladimir Doronin dropped $18.5 million on a penthouse apartment for Naomi in Sao Paolo. She's thinking of settling down in Brazil. [Page Six]
• So you know how there's a transgender contestant this cycle on America's Next Top Model? Janice Dickinson says: "I did it on my show first with Claudia (Charriez). But you know what? There’s not going to be a moment where Tyra’s not going to knock me off, so I’m not bothered by her." [MSNBC]
• Bonnie Hunt says her new show will be "full of humor and definitely accessibility, curiosity and spontaneity." She also says: "It's not so much celebrating other people's bad moments in daytime television, which has been a trend for a long time, but almost celebrating what really makes us laugh, what makes us feel very human and normal at the top of who we are, not necessarily at the bottom of who we are." [Reuters]
• Ben Affleck's been texting buddy/new dad Matt Damon from the DNC and Matt and his wife are "thrilled" about their new daughter, FYI. [People]
• Some dude has rammed his car into the gates of the Playboy Mansion twice in the last two weeks, according to the LAPD. Think he's trying to get to the grotto? [LA Times]
• Suge Knight was arrested and charged with assault after punching his girlfriend and pulling a knife on her. Death Row, indeed. [Reuters]
• Tori Spelling may not be appearing on the new 90210, but what about 42-year-old Luke Perry? The new ladies in the cast say: "Oh. My. God. I love Dylan McKay" and "Are you kidding me? He's an amazing-looking man. Sexy!" Oh, and in unrelated news, new 9er AnnaLynne McCord, who played Eden on Nip/Tuck likes guns. "My birthday is next week and I'm getting the 380 Ruger and a .38 revolver." [Yahoo News]
• Oh, and the new 90210 might be pretty racy. Shannen Doherty says: "All I know is there's a girl giving a guy a blow job in the first episode." Doherty and Jennie Garth both dish in this interview. [EW, ONTD]
• A retired sheriff allegedly broke into Chris Cornell's home, wandered from room to room and urinated in a corner. He was hired by Cornell's ex-wife as a process server. Talk about pissed off. [TMZ]
• Relations between Madonna and Elton John have been frosty since he accused her of lip-syncing four years ago. But! He went to her concert in Nice last night and they totes made up and are homies again, though Elton cracked, "I'll be found dead of uranium poisoning in three days." [Mirror]
• Russell Simmons told his yoga teacher her classes had gotten too easy and were for "pussies," so she amped it up; he was seen collapsing into the fetal position. [Page Six]
• Kate Moss's neighbors are in a spot of bother about a large crack that has appeared in the wall bordering her back garden. The wall could collapse, etc. Also, the paper just wanted to make "Kate Moss Crack Problem" jokes. [Mirror]
• Jerry Seinfeld's lawyers read papers in court yesterday claiming that Jerry did not slander the woman who accused his wife of ripping off her cookbook. He was just trying to get laughs, mocking frivolous lawsuits. His lawyers are trying to get the defamation suit against him tossed out; Jerry called author Missy Chase Lapine a "wacko" and "mentally unhinged celebrity stalker." [NY Post]
• Paul McCartney will perform in Israel for the first time, more than 40 years after the Beatles were blocked from giving a concert in the country. [Reuters]
• Steve Foley, who played drums with the Replacements, has died. He was 49. He accidentally overdosed on prescription medication. [Reuters]
• Neil Diamond performed earlier this week and his voice was raspy, so he's offering the audience at the Ohio concert a refund. Build me up, buttercup! [Reuters]
• A toxicology test has been ordered in the death of Dr. Dre's son. [People]
• "I haven't had this much fun since my ex-mother-in-law fell in a well" — Janice Dickinson, as she danced with models, celebrating the new season of her show. [Page Six]
• "I'm no Meryl Streep." — Kim Kardashian. [USA Today]
• "Just be polite. Listen to them and give them anything they want. You can't go wrong." Pete Doherty on picking up chicks. [Mirror]
• "[Miley Cyrus] is just a little too tarty, forgive me. I don’t want her to look like she’s going into a convent school, but it’s just a little too much for a 15-year-old. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear she was 25." — Tim Gunn. [MNSBC]
• "I couldn't do what Brad and Angie are doing. I wouldn't have the patience or dedication you need to take care of a family. I admire those qualities in other people but it's not for me. I'm doing exactly what I want to. I hang out with the same friends, I spend time in Italy, and then I go back to work. I try not to worry about anything else." — George Clooney. [Mirror]

• Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham was on a plane with kids Romeo and Cruz when a bird flew into one the of the aircraft's engines right before take-off. According to The Sun, "Passengers screamed as the pilot slammed on the brakes and the plane screeched to a halt. It was then that the horrifying scale of the disaster really hit home for Victoria — she realised she was wearing standard-issue aircraft pyjamas and no make-up." [The Sun]
• Amy Winehouse hit her own damn bodyguard. Get a grip, girl! [The Sun]
• And here's a man who says Amy Winehouse punched him in the face three times at a pub. Is this new news? It's so hard to tell. [The Sun]
• Jamie Lynn Spears and new baby! Picture! [ONTD, via OK!]
• Is Mary-Kate Olsen heading back to rehab? Midweek Madness will have more on this later. [Star]

• Madonna is pissed that lawyers are saying her relationship with Alex Rodriguez is "an affair of the heart." [The Sun]
• The New York Post points out: "Yesterday's Times reported, 'Madonna has denied having an affair with Rodriguez.' In actuality, the hair-splitting statement issued in her name said she is 'not romantically involved with [Alex] Rodriguez.' As many readers of this newspaper know, you don't have to be romantically involved to have an affair." [Page Six]
• When Lenny Kravitz learned he was being accused of having an extramarital affair with Alex Rodriguez's wife, Cynthia, he "looked like he was going to throw up," according to a witness. Apparently Lenny fired Guy Oseary, who then planted the Cynthia Rodriguez story in retaliation. Messy! [Page Six]
• Alex Rodriguez was seen having lunch with Rabbi Michael Berg, the director of the Kabbalah Centre. What does it all meeaaaaaaaaaaan? [People]
• The Britney/Madonna video will be "very deep." [ONTD]
• Matthew McConaughey's little surfer dude is named Levi Alves McConaughey. [DListed]
• Jessica Simpson is "deeply hurt" by Pam Anderson calling her a "bitch and a whore" for wearing a T-shirt that read "Real Girls Eat Meat." [MSNBC]
• The Christie Brinkley divorce case chugs along. A shrink thinks Christie and Peter Cook both need therapy. [Fox News]
• But! Between the two, the psychiatrist thinks Christie is the one who should get custody. Because Peter Cook is a narcissist with a bottomless ego, blah blah blah. [Yahoo News]
• Nashville, TN is having a moment: Nicole Kidman gave birth there, Miley Cyrus, who grew up there, is also filming a movie in town; Sheryl Crow, Jack White and Kid Rock all own homes in Nashville. [Yahoo News]
• There will not, repeat, NOT, be a Friends movie. You may return to your regularly scheduled ennui. [Perez Hilton]
• Nick Cannon proposed to Mariah Carey twice! First when they were hanging out on her rooftop, he hid a 17-carat diamond inside a candy ring pop. A few days later, "He sort of kidnapped me and took me on a helicopter ride," she says. "Then he re-proposed." She spills this in the new Elle magazine. She's on the cover next to a line that reads, "Feeling broke?" Compared to Mariah I am, thanks! [People]
• Oprah's show helped the DVD of the BBC show Planet Earth sell 3m copies worldwide. She should be in the dictionary under "juggernaut." [Financial Times]
• David Lee Roth almost died! He was in anaphylactic shock due to a nut allergy when cops pulled him over for speeding. Now I'm gonna have "Just A Gigolo" stuck in my head. Ayyyyy ain't got nooooo body… [Perez Hilton]
• Will Pete Doherty and Kate Moss get back together? Apparently they've been "swapping hot texts." [Mirror]
• The news that Chris Martin loves changing diapers is almost as boring as a Coldplay song. [The Sun]
• Twenty-year-old model Lily Cole: Went out with thirty-five year-old Jude Law recently; is now seeing rocker Bryan Ferry, 62. The Mail says, "He's old enough to be your granddad!" [Daily Mail]
• The Balthazar Getty/Sienna Miller affair continues, and now they're in Italy… as is Balthazar's wife. [Page Six]
• Kathie Lee Gifford: Seen using some sort of exercise device in the ladies room of a New York city restaurant. [Page Six]
• Russell Simmons is on the market! Porschia Coleman, the lady he was dating when his wife Kimora filed for divorce, is now out of the picture. Brown, leggy model? You could be next! [Page Six]
• Kirsten Dunst: Seen making out with a downtown DJ. [Page Six]
• The previously discussed Jimi Hendrix sex tape will hit very soon. Are you experienced? [Rush & Molloy]
• Kinda lame blind item: "Which chummy-seeming reality-show hosts can't stand each other off-camera?" [Rush & Molloy]
• Another beauty queen with "embarrassing" photos! This time it's Elyse Umemoto, Miss Washington 2007. She's just like, flipping off the camera, holding booze and making "suggestive oral sex gang signs." [TMZ]
• "George is a great guy, a wonderful person. I don't regret spending time with him, and he's a great person to get to know. We still remain friends and have kept in touch. In fact, we spoke over the phone a couple of days ago. He's fun to be around, down to earth, laid back, funny and smart. Most people know George has a great sense of humor and is an adept storyteller, but I will always miss his extraordinary dance moves." — Sarah Larson. [L.A. Times]
• "Who doesn't feel the pressure in this business? You can't be in it as a woman and not be mowed down by these things. You can either submit - or just get mad and defy it! I don't work out. I am fatter than any movie star you have ever met! But, you know, I don't care! My oldest daughter is an actress and the pressure on her to remain really, really, really thin, to be glamorous is intense. To be at openings and wearing couture and having people throw borrowed clothing and borrowed jewellery at her like she is a mannequin, just to sell other people's crap. It is too bad. It doesn't really enhance your ability to do the job." — Meryl Streep. [Mirror]

• Russell Simmons is forking over $20,000 per daughter in child support to Kimora Lee, which seems about right when you take into account that they are not just children but living ambassadors of Fabulosity. [TMZ]
• Naomi Campbell was kind enough to get arrested wearing one of Nelson Mandela's signature baseball caps, thus showering millions of dollars in free publicity on his AIDS awareness campaign, and this is the thanks she gets? [MSNBC]
• Mary-Kate Olsen and Ben Kingsley make out in the new movie The Wackness and now the guy we all associate with one of modern history's foremost humanist visionaires is going around talking about how making out with someone 42 years younger than him was completely cool and she was "totally in charge." [People]
• Miley Cyrus admits that her latest song "7 Things" is a very angry song, because it's about an ex-boyfriend, not a specific Jonas brotherly ex-boyfriend you understand, but just like a composite character ex-boyfriend, since anyone who's been around the block a few times knows that shitty guys generally adhere to a few typical patterns of behavior and also, hello, 15-year-old Disney teen idol confections maybe do not write their own songs. Not that their quotes don't sound like they do! "[It goes] through all the different stages of what's been going on the past couple years…It was like a little therapy moment for me." [People]

• Christian Bale thinks what happened after Heath Ledger's death amounted to a "hideous circus." [NY Mag]
• John Mayer is one of those guys who holds out the fact that he's never cheated on anybody as proof he is a "good guy," but like, what the fuck? With some people you are committing an act of social justice by cheating on them and yes I am talking about Jessica fucking Simpson. [MSNBC]
• The Christie Brinkley divorce…you know? I just can't get into it right now. How about we discuss our favorite Billy Joel songs again. If you want to get banned you will say "Still Rock N Roll To Me." [NYDN]
• Demi Moore is making some appearances in Dubai but somehow her heart doesn't seem like it's in it. [Page Six]
• Brad and Angie gave $1 million to a few charities helping in The Iraq. [AP]
• David Beckham is doing a line of mineral water. And sure, sure, it's fine for you and the Beastie Boys to say that maybe another bottled water brand is not what the world needs now, but if you bore the responsibility of hanging onto the title of World's Biggest Carbon Footprint you might come up with some not-particularly-original ideas yourself. [Mirror]
• Because Celine Dion sees your hysterical excess, and raises you a $36,343 water bill! [Palm Beach Post]
• When Tim McGraw spies a male fan aggressively groping a lady fan at one of his sold-out concerts, he kneels down, drags the guy by the wifebeater onstage, maybe takes a few swings in self-defense before handing him off to his roadies in time to sing the next line of the song he was singing, which just happens to be "I'm not lookin' for trouble." See, a few years back that story would have sounded apocryphal but this is the YouTube era so even doubting Thomases such as myself can safely assure you it really happened. [CMT]
• And yeah, ditto on the Verne Troyner sex tape. [TMZ]

• Synth! Dance beat! Breathy vocals! It's Lindsay Lohan's new track, "Bossy." And guess what? It doesn't totally suck. "Stop touching me without permission," she sings. "I'm jut a little bossy. If I want it, I get it — Now." Ha! Like that fur coat? But is the song as good as Kelis's "Bossy"? Well, LL's track was written by Ne-Yo. Lemme know what you think. I may have to listen again. And Again. And then one more time, with rollerskates on. I'm so embarrassed. [People]
  
• Meanwhile: Lindsay's dad Michael is pissed that the Mingling Moms named ex-wife Dina a "Top Mom." He says: "Are you kidding? Look at her off-screen antics, her lack of morals and how she conducts herself. She comes stumbling out of Butter at 3:15 a.m. with bloodshot eyes and a red runny nose, yelling 'Oh, [bleep],' when she saw the paparazzi." Meanwhile, Dina says: "He's on a mission to destroy me." Wow, this kind of stuff must be great for the kids to hear. [Page Six]
  
• So Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon spill all their wedding details to People, including the fact that they get along because they are 'both eternally 12 years old" and Mariah now has a "Mrs. Cannon" tattoo. [Yahoo News]

• Yeah, Amy Winehouse was arrested yesterday after video of her smoking crack and snorting cocaine made its way to police. [Rush & Molloy]
• But! Amy has already been released. She was not charged. [Reuters]
• Funnyman Craig Ferguson is writing a memoir! America On Purpose, due out next year, will touch on his addictions to drugs and booze, failed suicide attempt and career as a punk rocker. Raise your hand if you'd love to hear him read it to you. That accent! [Page Six]
• George Clooney was at the Hearst building yesterday for an Esquire photo shoot and women lost their freaking minds. [Page Six]
• After the Costume Institute gala, Jay-Z and Beyoncé — still in her ballgown — knocked on the door of a just-closed burger joint and ordered cheeseburgers and fries to go. [Page Six]
• Ashlee Simpson's boobs are big so she must be pregnant, right? "It's probably just a great bra, like any girl's secret," says her rep. [Rush & Molloy]
• Rapper DMX was arrested for driving 114 mph in a 1966 Chevy Nova. Y'all gonna make him lose his mind up in here. [TMZ]
• R. Kelly's lawyers have filed a motion to delay his trial... again. It's been five years already. [TMZ]
• "It is a sad day when an icon like Barbara Walters, in the sunset of her life, is reduced to publicly branding herself as an adulterer, humiliating an innocent family with accounts of her illicit affair and speaking negatively against me all for the sake of selling a book ... It speaks to her true character." — Star Jones. [TMZ]
• Russell Simmons and Kimora Lee's divorce is proceeding; Russell is seeking joint custody of their two daughters. Both parties are asking the court to deny spousal support for the other since they each have more money than they know what to do with. [People]
• Brooke Shields is "starring" in a new campaign from Royal Velvet towels. Think of her when you shower. [Brandweek]
• Nicole Richie says: "Joel actually changes more diapers than I do. It's his time with her. He sings to her .... He laughs with her, plays with her. It's amazing." [People]
• Who is Minnie Driver's baby daddy? Minnie hints that he is English and "sort of in the same business." OMG what if it's Eddie Izzard??? [People]
• Does Katherine Heigl want to leave Grey's Anatomy? A source says, "She's working really long hours and is ready to move on." [MSNBC]
• A portrait of Heath Ledger has won a top Australian art prize. [Reuters]
• Wil.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas says that staying away from the Beijing Olympics because of China's human rights record and crackdown on protesters in Tibet is a mistake. "America is talking out of both sides of its mouth," he says. "I know that everything I buy in America says 'Made in China' on it. So for me to just say, 'Yeah, that's right, boycott China' ... you're talking out of both sides of your mouth." [CNN]

The Good:
Note to self: Look as awesome as Iman every day. (Must find floral dress that is feisty, not frilly.) Also, accessorize with David Bowie.
Martha Stewart: Her basic black look is chic and fresh. It's a good thing.
Okay, considering that Donna Karan typically turns up looking somewhere between crazy cat lady and homeless, I'm relieved to see her in something fitted and a little funky. Also, totally digging the shoes.
Russell Simmons and Porschia Coleman: Gorgeous couple, great sense of style.
I only hope that Robert DeNiro appreciates the vast awesomeness of wife Grace Hightower's caftan.


The Bad:
It appears that Sigourney Weaver showed up in her pajamas.
Natasha Richardson's dress is just a wee bit too short, no? And Drena DeNiro is a little too made up.
As the heir apparent to the universe (she is Oprah's bestie after all), surely Gayle King could have mustered together something a little more impressive than this.
Dear Seinfelds: Stop looking so smug. Especially since Jessica's shoes are sure to embarrass you in years to come.


The Ugly:
I can't get over Deborah Lin's shoes. Even the intimidating presence of James Gandolfini isn't enough to distract from footwear that bears an uncanny resemblance to the first shoes-with-heels I ever owned. The year was 1997. The occasion was my Bat Mitzvah.

[Images via FilmMagic and Getty.]

The Good: Will someone get me O'Neal McNight's sweatshirt? Seriously. Please. Flo-Rida looks hot, rockin' his old-school style. But as the ladymags would say, where is the personal style in this? I'm crushing on hip-hop grandpa Russell Simmons. Never has one little t-shirt looked so little — but also hot! — as it does on Ciara.

The Bad: Sure, Diane Nguyen and Heather Smith have game (they're top poker players, after all) — but really: Couldn't they have added some flair to their 'Rock the Vote' shirts? Likewise, Emily King: Is that a polo shirt with a camo jacket? Are you even trying? Is Rocsi wearing her Madonna costume? Or her Frank Sinatra costume? (Or, worst of all, her Ashlee Simpson costume?!) Dear Valeisha Butterfield: Shiny + bandage dress = Bad idea.

The Ugly: All those colors + all those checkerboard squares = One big headache-inducing Lil Mama outfit.

[Images via FilmMagic.]

• Photographs of Angelina Jolie's (now) unborn babies could be worth a whopping $10 million. An editor who remains anonymous actually says: "It's at the point now where some stars might decide to have more kids just to collect the money from their photos." Hahahahahaha. No. [Page Six]
  
• By the by, People's issue with La Lopez twins sold between 2 and 3 million copies; Nicole Richie's cover sold 1.8 million; Christina Aguilera's sold 1.3 million. [ONTD]
  
• Russell Simmons and wife Kimora have filed for divorce — again. He filed in March 2006, but the proceedings never um, proceeded. In any case, since they have such intertwined careers and businesses, this should be interesting. [TMZ]
  
• They secretly went out two years ago, and now Matthew Perry has rekindled his relationship with Mean Girls actress Lizzy Caplan (she played Janis Ian). She's 13 years younger than he is and it's a "friends with benefits" type thing. [Janet Charlton's Hollywood]
  
• Tina Fey wants Ashley Dupre, aka Kristen, to be on 30 Rock. A skit involving Jack? Or Kenneth? [Page Six]
  
• Here's video of Ashley Dupre telling a Girls Gone Wild cameraman that she is over 18 and her name is Amber Arpalo. [TMZ]

• A jeweler says Jamie Lynn Spears' engagement ring is "very 1980s, with a yellow gold band." Aw, give the kid a break, she's 16! [E!]
• Ready, set, go: Patrick Dempsey will make an appearance Saturday at Gainsco Grand Prix of Miami at Homestead-Miami Speedway. [Miami Herald]
• Lily Allen introduced a clip on a BBC3 program: "It's my favourite. It's kegging, pulling someone's trousers down in public. Childish but very funny." Since the video showed a student pulling down a teacher's pants, the schoolboard people and Association of Teachers and so on are all apoplectic. [Mirror]
• The Diddy/Tupac kerfluffle that surfaced last week was an elaborate hoax cooked up by an "overweight white kid from Florida." LOL. [Page Six]
• The L.A. Times has apologized for using the forged documents in a story implicating Diddy in the Tupac assault. Their bad! [Yahoo News]
• Tommy Lee received a tattoo on a flight to Miami, helping the tattoo artist set a Guinness World Record. Uh, ink+needle+turbulence=disaster! [Page Six]
• There is a load of fake Heath Ledger memorabilia on the market, buyer beware. [News.com.au]
• Richie Sambora could face charges of child endangerment after being busted on a DUI charge Tuesday with his 10-year-old daughter Ava in the car. Cops say the vehicle was "weaving within lanes" before it was stopped and that Sambora had alcohol on his breath and failed all the field sobriety tests. [Rush & Molloy]
• One day after Dita Von Teese sued an adult-oriented trade show, claiming they owed her $50,000, they have paid up. Justice! [TMZ]
• An inquest has begun into the death of Corinne Bailey Rae's husband, who died Saturday of an apparent drug overdose. Jason Rae, 31, was a Scottish-born sax player whom Corinne (now 29) met in a jazz club where she worked as a coat-check girl. They got married in 2001. [People]
• David Beckham played a historic soccer, ahem, football match last night: He represented the England national team for the 100th time, becoming only the 5th player to ever reach the triple figure. Score! [People]
• Boxing champ and Dancing With The Stars alum Laila Ali is preggers! Her hubs is former NFL star Curtis Conway; he has three kids already but this is her first. Congrats! [People]
• Olivia Newton-John will walk the Great Wall of China for 21 days, in an effort to raise funds for cancer research. Good luck! [E!]
• Jessica Lange denies she had plastic surgery, despite a report in the National Enquirer. Well, now we need to see pictures. [Star Tribune]
• Artist Jeff Koons is being sued for overdue child support; he's failed to pay about $2.3 million, according to his ex-wife, La Cicciolina, an Italian porn star. [Reuters]
• Brooke Shields is having surgery on her foot — an old dance injury. Ow. [Page Six]
• How do we feel about Josh Brolin playing George W. Bush in the biopic directed by Oliver Stone? [Rush & Molloy]

The Good:
With little daughter Tallulah on his arm, Bruce Willis' actual date Emma Hemming is totally forgettable.
Irina Pantaeva has still got it.
Good for Russell Simmons: The hat is nice and Porschia Coleman seems a lot less heinous than Kimora.

The Bad:
Why is Anika Noni Rose not dressed for the red carpet?
Now surely Andre Leon Talley can do better than this. Did he have American Apparel make their gross pleather leggings into a coat for him?
Send in some queer eyes to get Carson Kressley a better fitting suit and some blotting papers, stat.
Is Donna Karan preparing for an apocalypse that renders her an evil Lawrence of Arabia?
As a major Debbie Harry fan, this hurts me to say, but these yellow plaid pants (are they flannel?!) make my heart cry a thousand times.
Glenda Bailey has clearly forgotten that a high-neck velvet dress is just one step above wearing an ugly Christmas sweater without irony.
Christian Siriano in yet another vest-and-skinny-black-pants look? He needs a new outfit.
Socialite Olivia Palermo's dress is just trying too hard.

The Ugly:
Arden Wohl's outfit is so bad it is clearly exhausted her with its ugliness.

[Images via Getty.]

[Miami, December 4. Images via Splash.]

• Kanye West's mother, Dr. Donda West, died Saturday in L.A. She was 58 years old. The cause of death has not been released. Dr. West was formerly the chair of Chicago State University's English Department. In her book, Raising Kanye, her son wrote in the foreword: "I have known my mom since I was zero years old. She is quite dope." [USA Today]
  
• Britney Spears has a new manager — her "friend" Sam Lufti. The same guy who may or may not have been trying to sell her emails to the tabloids. Stay classy, Brit! [Page Six]
  
• Uh, did Britney fail a drug test? [Perez Hilton]
  
• Maybe! The test came back positive, says a source. But the source also says it was a false postive. Maybe she had a poppy seed bagel? Also, did she run a red light with her kids (and court-appointed monitor) in the car — and not even notice, because she was texting? [TMZ]

• Oh, and is Britney on a medication called Provigil, which helps addicts kick cocaine? It was seen in her purse. Although it's also used to treat narcolepsy. It's hard to know what to think. [ONTD]
• View cohost Elisabeth Hasselbeck gave birth to a boy on Friday, and will call the show today to announce her son's name. YAWN. [People]
• Prince Harry and girlfriend Chelsy Day have split up. Some claim that Chelsy was fed up with Harry's playboy lifestyle. If you were a cute 23-year-old red-headed prince, would you settle down? [People]
• Amy Winehouse's husband, Blake Fielder-Civil, has been "crying non-stop" in prison. He was moved to a medical unit, which is supposed to calm him down. "He's crying for Amy," says a source. "He's more concerned about her." Amy is said to be "furious" she can't visit him until tomorrow. Messy stuff! [Mirror]
• Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis says his imprisonment is "an abuse of the criminal justice system." And that someone is trying to get "revenge"on him. Hmm, we thought it was because he filmed underage drunk girls showering together? [ABC News]
• Hip-hop impresario Russell Simmons loves critters: He's releasing an anti-dogfighting PSA. [Page Six]
• Rocker Lenny Kravitz worries when daughter Zoe's skirts are too short. Why are devoted dads so hot??? [Page Six]
• While Ashley Olsen is seeing Lance Armstrong, Mary-Kate is dating hockey player Sean Avery, who's apparently a cad. Watch out, M-K! [Page Six]
• Kate Hudson as seen making out with Heath Ledger??? Oy. We're having trouble keeping up. Also, ew. [Page Six]
• Marilyn Manson's girlfriend, Evan Rachel Wood, says she's not bisexual, but "there have been times where I have been attracted to a woman. I'm not afraid of sexuality. I think too many people get shit and get called skanky or a whore just because they are sexual." [Page Six]
• Is 43-year-old Desperate Housewives star Nicolette Sheridan pregnant? [Mirror]
• Entertainment Tonight's Mary Hart sat down with "famous puppy" Iggy — of the Ellen DeGeneres debacle — for some "exclusive footage." No, it's not a joke. [ET]

• Britney Spears lost custody of her kids because she didn't meet with a drug counselor, submit to drug testing or enroll in parenting classes — all things the judge overseeing her custody battle with Kevin Federline had ordered. Is it possible that she'd be relieved not to have primary custody? [TMZ]
  
• By the way, Britney finally applied for a California driver's license. For the love of Zeus, let's hope she passes the written test! [People]
  
• The new issue of Vanity Fair claims that Lou Perlman — the man who created *NSync and the Backstreet Boys — was a pedophile and a sleazeball who had inappropriate contact with boy band members, including Nick Carter. Wonder if Timberlake was spared? [Page Six]
  
• Derek Jeter is dating actress Gabrielle Union? First of all, In Touch said she was dating Ludacris. Second: Does she know about the herp? [Page Six]

• "Something is definitely going on" between Cameron Diaz and newly divorced actor Bradley Cooper. He's hot, so we hope so, for her sake. [Page Six]
• Kimora Lee Simmons threw husband Russell Simmons a surprise 50th birthday party! Russell brought a date named Porschia Coleman; Kimora brought boyfriend Djimon Hounsou. How very modern! [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which famous tennis player is teased by her friends for 'being such a white girl' because of her fondness for the works of Miss Cyndi Lauper?" [Gatecrasher, last item]
• Sienna Miller and BFF Rhys Ifans got matching swallow tattoos in Dublin yesterday. And you know how Kate Moss says Sienna copies her? Well, Kate has a tattoo of that bird as well. LOL! [The Sun]
• Pete Doherty's court date was pushed back. Again. [Telegraph]
• Bono is redeveloping an old hotel in Dublin, but a critic says he's demolishing a historic structure. Potayto, potahto. [Telegraph]
• Pink and Carey Hart: Still together. She was seen giving him a lap dance while singing karaoke in Venice Beach, CA. [Splash News]

• Victoria Beckham's latest professional endeavor is a makeup line called "V-Sculpt," which is supposed to give its users finer features. It launches today in Tokyo. Because Asia is known for its coarse, exaggerated features? Also: what? [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Kate Moss had 18 advertising contracts last year; now she has 11. DO WE SMELL A DOWNFALL??? [The Sun]
  
• Andre 3000 is launching a clothing label! Dandy! (Heh.) Menswear comes first, to be followed by lady wear. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• Italian cabdrivers share Anna and Moe's sentiments regarding the fashion industry. [GlamChic]
  
• Le SportSac's creative director on how she envisions her company's bags: "I want them to be like your friend who helps solve your problems!" Ha ha ha, like all that excess money in your pocket [Fashion Week Daily]

• Russell Simmons is clearly a more evolved person than us, and only has nice things to safe about his crazyass ex: On appointing her creative director for all the Phat Farm labels, Simmons says, "Kimora has watched me do it for 15 years and she has already come to me with some great ideas for the men's lines." Zen Master Jay! [WWD, sub req'd]
• Christina Aguilera goes nude in fragrance ad: Evaluate here. [Sassybella]
• Claudia Schiffer "not really into acting." [WWD, 3rd item]
• H&M profits are up 25% in the second quarter. Which gives us pause because we feel like we haven't seen anything good there in OMG forever. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Our girl-crush on Gucci creative director Frida Giannini deepens: she was behind the pairing of David Lynch and Blondie for first television commercial for Gucci. Seriously, we think we're in love. [Vogue UK]
• Fashion photographer Mario Testino is auctioning off a signed photo he took of Princess Diana, with proceeds, as Kathy Griffin would say, "for the children." [Vogue UK]
• Paint manufacturer-discount retailer collaborations are the new designer-discount retailer collaborations! Uniqlo and Pantone are collaborating on a series of cashmere sweaters together. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Oscar de la Renta: Now designing men's shirts! [Fashion Week Daily]

Dear Fashion Weekers:

I'm on the train headed back to DC - tranquil, lovely DC with its tree-lined streets and clean air (well, cleaner at least) that doesn't give me the Black Lung. Back to the yoga studio and my pastoral life. After Fashion Week in New York, it's what I crave — to escape the madness of New York, and the mania of

Fashion Week. Merrriam-Webster defines mania as follows: Main Entry: ma·nia Function: noun Etymology: Middle English, from Late Latin, from Greek, from mainesthai to be mad; akin to Greek menos spirit — more at MIND 1 : excitement manifested by mental and physical hyperactivity, disorganization of behavior, and elevation of mood; specifically : the manic phase of bipolar disorder 2 a : excessive or unreasonable enthusiasm a mania for saving things — often used in combination b : the object of such enthusiasm

"Mania" seems like an appropriate word for Fashion Week, particularly the bipolar part. Fashion Week is all about extremes. The first day brings panic and anxiety attacks to some, headaches to others, as well as colds, flues, rashes, itching, massive diarrhea attacks and fits of vomiting. In short, people freak out. I love New York, and I enjoy fashion but the two combined forces result in a perfect storm of dizzying madness.

Many amazing things transpire across those 8 days as Shakti, the Hindu goddess of creation, manifests herself in the beautiful dresses crafted by the designers, the performance of each show, the formation of new friendships and business partners. But Shiva, the god of destruction casts his shadow - as the girls on the runway waste away, emaciated. "You can never be too skinny..." the old adage says. But what about the girls who die from anorexia and bulimia in the fashion industry and beyond? We protest the use of fur in fashion, but what about the starving girls? Perhaps a new organization needs to be formed - "People for the Ethical Treatment of Models." I'll be a Charter member. I've seen older women who have preserved their size 2, 6 foot frame through years of malnutrition at great detriment to their health. Tragic! I found myself humming Ted Leo's song, "Me and Mia" more than once last week.

Fighting for the smallest goal: to gain a little self-control Won't anybody here just let you disappear? Not doctors, nor your mom and dad, but me and Mia, Ann and Ana Know how hard you try. Don't you see it in my eyes? Sick to death of my dependence, fighting food to find transcendence Fighting to survive, more dead but more alive Cigarettes and speed for livin', and sleeping pills to feel forgiven All that you contrive, and all that you're deprived All the bourgeois social angels telling you you've got to change Don't have any idea. They'll never see so clear.

And what's it gonna be folks, which is more coveted - being thin or being buxom? Because it's nearly impossible to be both naturally. Any girl will tell you that the first thing to go when losing weight is her breasts - they shrink! So then what - breast augmentation surgery, our modern-day answer to all those storied female mutilation traditions? A friend of mine was once considering breast augmentation. Her doctor told her that it's common to experience depression after the procedure. When their larger breasts aren't the answer to all of life's problems and reality sets in, an anti-depressant cocktail is often needed. Big boobs do not equal happiness.

Ok, back to Fashion Week — skinny girls in beautiful clothes. Guests sizing one another up - who's that? who's that? velvet ropes, endless lists and most importantly, what are they wearing? I was reminded of a my experience in 7th grade when most of the girls wore ESPRIT and Tretorns, and displayed their clothing tags on the inside of their locker door for all to see. It almost seemed like brand worship. The training of "label whores" begins early. Labels become an artificial means of creating barriers between us and them. The steady march down the path of isolation and is easy with the harsh wind of hyper consumerism at our backs.

Shiva/Shakti, the yin and the yang, call it what you will, manifests in the way "celebrities" are treated, as well. It's a love/hate relationship. We maneuver to catch a glimpse of them, but then we perhaps project our own sense of self-hatred onto them and revel in their misery. As a Hindu sage once said, "All is within."

More dualism at the fabulous and fun Heatherette afterparty. It was a celebration of creativity and reminded me of pre-Giuliani New York. The drag queens, often cast out by society as freaks were being celebrated. But in the midst of the celebration I saw a boy standing by the bathroom looking ill from over consumption of perhaps the narcotic sort. It sort of broke my heart. To see him punishing his body when it was a time to celebrate it. I was also disturbed by the number of times I heard gay men refer to themselves as "fags" with a hint of self-loathing in their voice. I wanted to say - so you're gay - who cares? what's not to love?

But the Russell Simmons party at Tenjune had a darker energy about it. The crowd — a typical Fashion Week mix of models (a couple familiar faces), some rap artists but none I recognized, and banker types. What is it about bankers? They were all wearing white checked shirts that all looked like they'd come to the party directly from Thomas Pink. Forgive me for asking, but even in Washington I believe it is conventional wisdom that Pink is very, like, 2004. Is it staging a comeback? I also wondered, how is it that they party so hard when they have to show up at the office at 7 a.m. the next day? Are they on amphetamines? Throughout the week I wondered whether I was the only person in this town who was not abusing Adderall. I was also impressed with the fact that most of them seemed to be in very good shape. How do they find time to work out, amidst all the frantic phone calling and late night Power-Pointing and model-groping?

The night began with typical hip-hop fare. But as the evening progressed the set migrated from hip-hop to U2 (we nearly left) and then lots of trance-y house. Is ectsasy back in vogue? What I have never understood is why a person would take drugs — and the same goes for cocaine, heroin and crack — when they are fully aware that some foreign substance has been added to them, and they are also fully aware that they have no idea what that substances are.

Perhaps on account of such substances, the room was tense with anticipation, permeated by a vibe of quiet desperation not unlike the type one encounters at casinos. Everyone seemed to have a suddenly urgent agenda — fame, fortune, love — but the reason I bring up ecstasy is because quite a lot of people seemed to have an agenda called "plain old sex." In one corner a few female models were grinding male models, and in another bankers were grinding on girls who were maybe publicists. Then some dude who was like the cousin of the brother of the best friend of the owner of a very, very famous Italian restaurant walked in, and a crowd of girls grinded up against him en masse. Why? I couldn't say, but at that point the dancing seemed to get more overtly sexual. Something like the lambada was being performed. Girls began necking men I knew they'd never spoken two words to.

One man attempted this sort of move on me. "I know everybody in the entertainment industry, so if you want to be a star I can hook you up," he said, while draping his arm around me. I didn't know men still used lines like like this. Do they work? I shrank away. But it did not end. Throughout the evening I had to: a) repeat multiple times to several different "suitors" that they were invading my personal space. Usually that didn't work so then I'd escalate to b) firmly stating that I DON'T LIKE TO BE TOUCHED BY PEOPLE WHO DON'T EVEN KNOW MY FIRST NAME. If that failed then I'd c) swat and shoo them away. I had to use this tactic on a man who somehow felt it appropriate to straddle me, right there on my seat.

And so it was heart-wrenching to watch my sisters, many of them straight off the catwalk, acting like lesbians and kissing on the dance floor just to vie for the attention of men whose idea of "seduction" is grabbing one's thigh. Ladies! It's 2007...not 1777. You don't need a man to complete you. You're not going to find happiness at the end of that line of blow, or in the arms of some wasted banker. Being beautiful has a disadvantage: the type of men you attract are often shallow. They may drive fancy cars, but they are not exactly emotionally available. Start buying your own drinks! And having your own LIFE.

There's no shortage of awesome guys out there - but you're probably not going to find them humping your leg at Tenjune at 3 am. And not all sisters are trying to steal your man. Which leads me to another depressing dynamic observed - that of the possessive girlfriend/sex interest. Why is it that male dogs are territorial (hence the leg-lifting) - it's usually a masculine trait - but it seems like women have become the more territorial of the sexes among Homo-sapiens. Goodness! If he's so easily swept off his feet by alluring glances from some girl, the heck with him anyway. Replace him with one who values who you are - a unique individual - not some interchangeable part. Then we can have more meaningful relationships with our boys, and not view every woman as the enemy. Don't deprive yourself of that. Leave the deprivation to your diet.

Anyway I'm almost to Union Station, and trying to leave it all behind. I was thrilled by the the creativity yet saddened by the destruction and desperation. Fashion Week brings out both to the extreme. So relieved to return to my fairly balanced (if slightly boring) life in DC. My heart goes out to those who are trapped in that world, seduced by the illusion of all that glitters, under Maya's spell. You are loved, even if you weren't on the runway, and can't afford designer clothes.

And my best to Andrew Freesmeier and his crew at IMG, the hardest working man in the tents. Way to pull it off - with grace. Thanks for a fantastic week!

• Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams: SPLIT! "They've been fighting for six months," says a source. Their daughter, Matilda, is 23 months old. [Star]
  
• Michelle's dad says he has "great respect for Heath" even though the dad was "never invited into their world." Maybe because he's self-exiled in Australia for tax evasion?[News.com.au]
  
• Owen Wilson is on the mend and "doing very well" says director Wes Anderson. [NY Post]
  
• In addition, "When [Owen's] ready he's going to speak for himself much better than anyone else could," Anderson says. [People]
  
• Grey's Anatomy actress Kate Walsh, 39, got married over the weekend. [People]
  
• Dina Lohan's new boyfriend calls Michael Lohan a violent, drug-abusing criminal who never deserved his "classy, intelligent" wife. It's like a Telenovela, come to life! [Page Six]

• Photographer David LaChappelle "hates" Gwen Stefani, Christina Aguilera and Madonna. It's like a Telenovela come to life! [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which Hollywood trio of friends is in trouble? One is on crack, one's on smack, and the other cheats so much on his wife that he single-handedly is supporting several hookers." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which singer keeps her slender frame so thin the old-fashioned way? Seems a 'major eating disorder' helps keep her midriff worth baring." [Page Six]
• Is Kelly Klein really using her own (50-year-old) eggs to get pregnant? Why does anyone care? [Page Six]
• A "frenzied female fan" rushed Brad Pitt at the Venice Film Festival, and he was shaken up, poor thing. [Page Six]
• But Brad and Angelina are ready for a fifth child! They don't have one from South America yet, so we think they should head to Peru or something. [People]
• Did Gisele Bundchen send Bridget Moynahan's new baby a onesie with the word "supermodel" on it? Because that would be crazy. [Gatecrasher]
• Zach Braff, Nicole Richie and Samantha Ronson dined together at Dominick's in L.A. on Wednesday night. Zach is everywhere. [Gatecrasher, 5th item]
• Blind item! "Which Hollywood megastar couple likes to have the hotel where they stay in New York clip flattering pictures of them and their child from the celeb weeklies, to put in frames before they arrive at their suite?" [Gatecrasher, last item]
• A former manager claims Mariah Carey owes him major bucks. [Rush & Molloy]
• Russell Simmons: did yoga with John Edwards? Likes Kucinich?? [Rush & Molloy, 3rd item]
• When John Mayer and Jessica Simpson were dating, Jessica would "call photographers and set him up all the time," says a source. [TMZ]
• The child welfare official from Malawi who was supposed to go to London to assess Madonna has been removed from the case under allegations he solicited money from the singer for the trip. Messy! [ABC News]
• Pete Doherty missed his court appearance because he'd checked into rehab. It's like déjà vu all over again! [Reuters]
• Usher finally married his 37-year-old baby mama. [USA Today]
• Courtney Love denies she said "I've never seen anyone take as much coke" as Amy Winehouse. "Even I wasn't that bad." Her denial was via Perez Hilton, sigh. [Mirror]
• The Israeli actress-model-artist who dated Olivier Martinez after he broke up with Kylie Minogue speaks! "What they say about French lovers is all true." [Daily Mail]
• Bill Murray was stopped by the police while driving a golf cart in downtown Stockholm. [Yahoo! News]

• Shocking but true: MTV is investing in subversive style iconoclast Lauren Conrad's clothing line. What, Emily Weiss didn't tell her about "private equity"? We think this is a first for media behemoth Viacom and the apparel industry and we can only hope Toastie and Scott Baio's BFF are next, and that whoever owns Fuse will back Heidi and Spencer's line of American flag wear, and that no one in the country ever buys any of this shit. [Portfolio]
  
• Quote of the day:"I actually think our customer prefers it if she has to work a little for it. She knows she's not going to smell like everyone else," Jennifer Balbier, senior vice president of global product development, MAC Cosmetics, regarding limited edition fragrances. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Yogi/mogul (yogul?) Russell Simmons steps down as CEO of Phat Fashions so crazy Kimora can "get space" in which to self-destruct. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Derek Jeter's second fragrance comes out in December. It's called Driven Black. We think this sounds a little racist, but we're confused by that, because it would be a different story if it were called "Paint it Black" or "Smelling like a baseball player's cup is the new black" ... pondering. [WWD, sub req'd]

• Now that she's blazed a trail through young Hollywood's most eligible male heirs, club-happy Lindsay Lohan may be shacking up with lesbian DJ Samantha Ronson. [PerezHilton]

• Will Smith is apparently the most powerful actor on the planet. In other news, Posh 'n Becks quest for U.S. domination may not be going so well. [LizSmith]

• Candy Spelling pens an open letter to Larry Birkhead on how to handle the slings and arrows of fame. Rule No. 1: Make sure your hair looks perfect! [TMZ]

• Yoga/animal-loving mogul Russell Simmons is selling his ostentatious NJ house for $23.8 million. Hopefully he'll unload his wife Kimora once and for all soon afterwards. [TMZ]

• Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady go to church! Shop for groceries! [PageSix]

• Former Miss USA Tara Conner is taking to the Hollywood lifestyle quite nicely, thank you. She's already moved in with a guy she met [PageSix]

• Drew Barrymore and Spike Jonze. Still on! [WWD]