Man, does anyone do pure glam like Iman? (That's not rhetorical. The answer is no.)


Although Susan Fales-Hill is not half-stepping either, as a lame, sleazy dude said to me once after complimenting my friend.


What is it that renders Emmy's bodice detailing somewhat...mature?


Oh, and you have to see the side-view, when she goes totally ethereal Aphrodite. Somewhat ridiculous, but when you've done that "Music of the Night" Victoria's Secret scene at such a tender age, your threshold is probably permanently altered. (And what does Duritz make of it, btw?)


I am on record in my affection for the public persona of JoAnna Garcia (since, you know, I don't actually know her.) And while I'm still getting used to platform-and-gown-not-in-a-drag-show, she's working it.


I once saw this quote where Rufus Wainwright said "I have a body that looks really good in clothes," which, while it was one of the most ludicrous things I'd seen prior to seeing Jorn Weisbrodt's cravat, is also indubitably true.


Presented without comment.


Y'know, Natalie and Mila would look impeccably cute all alone - the coordinating perfection just takes it over the top. And did they plan this? Because there are literally no photographs where they're not huddling together like this.


Aww, I hate it when "guests" are not identified, especially when they sport such riveting jewelry!


Remember that IMAX film Blue Planet? Yeah, so does Veronica Webb. Ah, those halcyon, post-March-of-the-Penguins years when we thought people would line up forever to watch nature films...


See, what is the fur adding to this beyond a recoil factor? Not warmth, surely - her arms are still bare! I don't understand, unnamed guest!


Yeah, you know what I think of when I hear "American Ballet Theatre Gala?" Adam Duritz. Rage on. Guy's only doing it for some doll, some doll.

[Images via Getty]

• Move over Jon Stewart, Hugh Jackman will be hosting this year's Oscars! "Hugh is the ideal choice to host a celebration of the year’s movies – and to have fun doing it." says a flack. [Deadline Hollywood]

• Kate Winslet is offended by speculation that her 30-year-old character in The Reader is a child abuser for having an affair with a 15-year-old. "To me, that is absolutely not this story at all. That boy knows exactly what he's doing. And, for a start, Hanna Schmitz thinks that he's 17, not 15, you know? She's not doing anything wrong. They enter that relationship on absolutely equal footing. Statutory rape? Really, please, don't use that phrase…This is a beautiful and very genuine love story and that is how I always saw it," Winslet says. [UPI]
• Despite earlier reports, Pete Wentz swears up and down that he and Ashlee do not want to hock their photos of newborn Bronx to the highest bidder. "Truth is like every celeb couple we were offered
  mounds and mounds of money by mags from here to Guam to pimp out the baby. We just don’t want to go down that road with him," Wentz says on his blog. [Perez]
• Zooey Deschanel's fake band in the movie Yes Man is called Munchausen By Proxy Syndrome, and it's actually not half bad. [NYM]
• Rufus Wainwright is one gay guy who will not be joining the fight against Prop 8: "Oddly enough, I’m actually not a huge gay marriage supporter," Rufus says. "I personally don’t want to get married but I think that any law or amendment to the constitution that deals with sex and love should just be banned in general. I don’t think any government should encroach on what goes on in the bedroom at all. Frankly, if you want to marry a dog, why don’t you go ahead and marry a dog, I don’t care. I’m a complete libertarian and so I really disagree with it." [Perez]
• Rut roh. Allegedly Denise Richards is in dire financial straits. "She's willing to do just about anything and take any role that's not pure porn," says a source. [TMZ]
• Rumors abound that Axl Rose has Anthropophobia, or loosely, he's afraid of people, and has been avoiding interviews and his management as a result. His flacks deny it, saying, "He has not been diagnosed with anthropophobia. He hasn't fired Front Line, and no interviews have been canceled." It does sound sort of far-fetched. [Perez]
• Aw, 9-year-old Angelina Salaiz got to meet her hero, Mariah Carey, earlier today on CBS's morning show. We bet they bonded over a shared love of Hello Kitty and butterflies. [CBS News]
• Is the world ready for a Mel Gibson comeback? Um E! Online says yes, because he grew a mustache. Yeah…ok. [E! Online]
• K-Fed was out bowling and he kissed a mystery lady. Riveting news! [TMZ]

• Wow, Lindsay Lohan and Sean Penn nuzzled at a private dinner for Milk last week. Samantha Ronson was not present. What does it all mean? [Fox 411]
• Photographs of Jennifer Aniston in a wet T-shirt with a "visible breast" are in a calendar, but a spokesperson says, "I don't think this is legal." [Times Of India]
• In this interview to promote Marley & Me, Jennifer Aniston gets pissy about her personal life, and when asked about the "difficult times," Owen Wilson walks out. [USA Today]
• Oh, dear: Amy Winehouse's husband, Blake Fielder-Civil, wants $1.6 million to walk away from the marriage and not write a tell-all book. All together now: What kind of fuckery is this? [Perez Hilton]
• Another divorce payout: Madonna will reportedly give Guy Ritchie about £32 million in cash and prizes. [Telegraph]

• In this interview, Brtiney's mom, Lynne Spears, says she almost called her autobiography All My Fault. "I can laugh about it now, but did I feel that way at the time? Yes, I did and, if I'm being totally honest, I still do," she says. Lynne also talks about being worried that Britney will kill herself, the conservatorship and what's missing in Britney's life. [Daily Mail]
• David Beckham was being followed by paparazzi, so he and his bodyguard got out of the car and started punching photographers through the other car's window. [E!]
• Click to see a picture of David Beckham bungee jumping in New Zealand! [Mirror]
• Mary-Kate Olsen: Not pregnant, which makes it okay that she was in Miami, "smoking and drinking vodka cocktails all night." [Page Six]
• Ouch! Man Vs. Wild host Bear Grylls injured his shoulder in Antarctica during an expedition to raise money for charity. [CNN]
• What does Scarlett Johansson want for Christmas? Tickets to Barack Obama's inauguration ball! [Mirror]
• Is 42-year-old Janet Jackson knocked up? [Perez Hilton]
• Heath Ledger was posthumously named best actor by the Australian Film Institute for his role in The Dark Knight. [Reuters]
• Heidi Montag's mom suggested maybe Heidi was drugged before she married Spencer Pratt; Heidi says: "I want to make it very clear to family, friends and fans that the decision to marry Spencer was very much mine." Ugh, we know. [Contact Music]
• Perez Hilton has a book, you guys. Inside, predictions such as: "Britney will be probably be dead. I believe she came pretty close to the stripper pole in the sky the last time she hit rock bottom." And! Nicole Richie "will be really fat in her old age. Her body will rebel and she’ll weigh almost 180 lbs. OMG!" [Gatecrasher]
• America Ferrera will be the master of ceremonies at a debt-retirement "conversation" with Hillary Clinton. The Senator has $7.5 million in campaign debt, yikes. [MSNBC]
• Poor Barbra Streisand got a kiss from President Bush, whom she loathes, at the Kennedy Center honors. [NY Post]
• In an interview with Gwyneth Paltrow and her friend/trainer, Tracy Anderson (who also trains Madonna), Gwynnie reveals: "When I was about 25, I started doing ashtanga yoga every day. I did Pilates for a while and was always disciplined about it, but I never got the results I get with this. After my first 10 days I lost 11 inches!" [Gotham Magazine]
• Want Kanye West to appear at an after-party? Better have $40,000. [News.com.au]
• If you have $8.5 million, you can scoop up Jennifer Lopez's Bel Air estate. [TMZ]
• Jamie Foxx jokes that he's trying to pick out Barack Obama's Christmas puppy right now: "I think I'm going to get him a pitbull, we just got to keep it street." [Yahoo News]
• Lily Allen "swaps grungy guys for a more mature gent": She went to the ballet with her grandfather. [Mirror]
• Oh, and Lily Allen is sticking up for Amy Winehouse: "Yes, she does get out of her mind on drugs sometimes, but she is also a very clever, intelligent, witty, funny person who can hold it together. I mean, there aren't that many people with whom the press concentrate on their personality so much. I think in the UK, as far as females go, it's mainly me and her that get that treatment. She gets it more than I do. But I don't see it that much with other people." [Mirror]
• Keanu Reeves is trying to quit smoking. "I didn't even start until I was 30," he says. "Now it's a prison. I want to stop." [Daily Mail]
• Due to the economy, Kate Hudson is having a handmade Christmas: "We've always been pretty crafty anyway," she says. "We all knit. The girls knit. This year I’m doing these great big knit… Well, actually I shouldn’t even talk about it because I can’t say it!" [People]
• Wow, Catherine Hardwicke, who directed Twilight, won't be directing the sequel. What will become of the fangless, unscary vampires now? [EW]
• Terri Seymour on her breakup with Simon Cowell: "Simon will be a hard act to follow. But on the bright side at least I will be able to use the mirror. He used to take forever in the mornings." [Mirror]
• Suri Cruise is a budding artist. [Daily Mail]
• Dame Judi Dench was presented with a lifetime achievement award by The European Film Academy at a gala in Copenhagen, Denmark. [UPI]
• Jonny Lee Miller's wife, Michele Hicks, gave birth to a baby boy, Buster Timothy Miller. Will Buster get to play with the Jolie-Pitt kids? Jonny is still friends with ex-wife Angelina Jolie, right? [Yahoo News]
• Another day, another stalker: Alyssa Milano is seeking a temporary restraining order against a man who hiked miles to try and reach her and has displayed "increasingly threatening behavior." [AP]
• Chris Klein and Ginnifer Goodwin: Splitsville. [ET]
• Uterus news: Eric Dane says he and wife Rebecca Gayheart are "trying" to have kids. [ET]
• Another important message from Natalie Portman and Rashida Jones. [Funny Or Die]
• Blind item! "Which supposedly straight funnyman keeps getting caught in West Village dives propositioning men by opening his legs and winking? We hear the B-lister had a few takers." [Gatecrasher]
• 'Tis the season? There are six Holocaust-themed movies this winter. [Page Six]
• The Fonz, Henry Winkler, had terrible dyslexia: "I'd look at a menu, which I couldn't read, then ask what everyone else was having and choose from that. Or if I was out with a girl I'd tell her I loved the way she spoke and get her to read the whole menu to me. I got through life by listening very carefully to what people said and learning that way. As I got older I learned to ask for help." [Daily Mail]
• Is Danity Kane/Hairspray's Aubrey O'Day gay? [Page Six]
• "I'm 41. Everybody says I'd be dead. Well, I wouldn't be dead, I'd just be a little caricature of a rock star. Who wants to be a drug addict at 41? Listen, I'm 41, I've got two kids, I don't expect a 16-year-old to be looking to me for inspiration. It's the Arctic Monkeys' job now. I've done my bit. Now we go in the studio and it's just like, let's make some records, let's do it cos we love it." — Noel Gallagher. [Guardian]
• "I didn't want to see her journey belittled. She was not a stereotypical long-suffering wife who just chastised her husband when he was grumpy and took care of the kids. She was extremely capable, and she was forward thinking. Looking back, she was clearly a feminist." — Laura Linney on her role as Abigail Adams in John Adams. [Telegraph]
• "I'm just really lazy. Too lazy to phone the cleaning lady. But I do have a German boyfriend. He can't help cleaning. Recently he came back from a long trip and he kissed me and immediately went and cleaned the toilet." — Rufus Wainwright. [Newsweek]
• "I'm at a strange age. I'm not a woman yet, but I'm not a girl any more. [Film companies] say, 'Oh, in a couple of years you’ll be perfect for this.' I'll be like, yeah, but I want to be studying English then, so it’s going to be quite tough to choose between the two. I'm going to have a battle on my hands, because after Harry Potter has finished, I don't know. I definitely want to go to university." — Emma Watson. [Times Of London]
• "I will not be shagging Russell Brand. Just because I gave him my number does not mean I’ll be going on a date with him. I was the subject of one of his calls once, but I didn’t answer the phone thank goodness! I just saw his name come up on the screen and thought: 'I don’t think I’m going to answer that right now.' He was on air and it was just good female intuition. I had another conversation with him on the radio shortly before he left his radio show and he is a lot fun. I like him. And I can totally handle guys like that." — Dita Von Teese. [The Sun]

The Good:
Becki Newton is wearing a beautiful dress in one of my favorite colors, bright yellow. So why the scowl?

Ah, if only Candis Cayne and Billy Baldwin were an actual couple. How glam they look a deux. [It's soooo hard to believe Candis was born a man! — Dodai]

Memo to Cindy Crawford: Always wear red. And accessorize with Rande Gerber.

Ellen DeGeneres: The Charlie Chaplin of our age?

Portia DeRossi borrows a page from Ellen's handbook and rocks the white pants.

Oh, Jackie Warner. Why must you always look so fierce? (And be such a bitch on Work Out?)

It's going to be hard for Jennifer Beals to do the bit with the chair in a ladylike evening gown like this.

Kathy Griffin looks good. She's also looking less and less like Kathy Griffin.

Dear Rufus Wainwright and Jorn Westfeldt: Please give me the clothes off your back. And sing Judy Garland songs for me.

Yeah, Sofia Veragara is going to need to strip down and give me her dress too. It's so effortless but luxe.

Catch your balance, Sally Field — you look lovely!

The Bad:
Miss Jackson If You're Nasty: Is that a jumpsuit I spy?

Jay Manuel, conquistador.

I'm sorry: Rami Kashou should have worn something draped.

The Ugly:

Love the dress, but loathe the shoes, Sarah Silverman.

So many bad ideas in one little outfit on one little Sharon Lawrence. Sigh.

[Images via Getty.]

The Good:
It's not green Proenza Schouler, but Amy Adams still looks sleek.
Nom nom Lee Pace!
Bharat Nalluri gives a lesson in how men ought to dress.
Correction: James Schamus gives a lesson in how men ought to dress.
Jane Alexander stays classy.

The Bad:
Carol Alt: So, um, early 90's?
Why do Steve Buscemi and his wife Jo Andres look so sad in their clothes?
The question must be asked: Is Michael Kors wearing a woman's coat?
Tom Payne: Sunburned or stoned?

The Ugly:
Stop breaking our hearts, Rufus Wainwright, and put away the Christmas sweaters.

[Images via Getty.]

• "As for the question of whether the surge is working, I can only state what I witnessed: U.N. staff and those of non-governmental organizations seem to feel they have the right set of circumstances to attempt to scale up their programs. And when I asked the troops if they wanted to go home as soon as possible, they said that they miss home but feel invested in Iraq." From a thoughtful opinion piece written by...Angelina Jolie? Ummmm, does this mean she's joining her estranged dad in support of McCain? (Oh, and in case you were wondering, that's her with Gen. David Petraeus and some other broad earlier this month in Baghdad, where she supposedly did all the "observing" and "interviewing" she talks about in the column. ) [Washington Post]
  
• "Anyone who says they don't enjoy the army is mad - you can spend a week hating it and the next week it could be the best thing in the world and the best job you could ever, ever wish for. It has got so much to offer." That was Prince Harry before he went to Afghanistan, where he apparently saw actual gunplay. We hear it's not rare out there! A three month tour, on the other hand... [Times Of London]
  
• "Britney Spears is basically an analogy for the world." That's Rufus Wainwright. Leave it to the gays to cling to their cynicism.[NY Mag]

• Hey speaking of, one in a hundred Americans is in prison right now. I know, it sounds low. But expensive! Many states now spend as much on corrections as higher education. [Washington Post]
  
• "I believe Sen. Obama better stay focused on his campaign with Senator Clinton, neither of whom has secured their party's nominee yet." Guess who? It's George W. Could you tell from the grammatical error? Or did you see it on CNN. He said it all stern-like, like he was making a threat. But like, what's the threat? Such an intriguing man. [The Swamp]
  
• He also maintains there's no recession. Yeah, I'm with Rufus. [AP.]
  
• I want to have his babies of the day: Jeffrey Fisher, an attorney representing fishermen suing Exxon for that oil spill thing that happened back during the Cold War who still, admirably, has his sense of humor. [Wash Post]

• Isaac Mizrahi is defecting from Target to join Tim Gunn at Liz Claiborne. [Maybe they will post a YouTube video of themselves doing lunch at the company salad bar so Jennie can use it for porn! -Moe] This is supposed to be a big "blow" to Target, but Claiborne can use all the help it can get. [NYT]
  
• Keith Richards is the new face of Louis Vuitton. It was Marc's idea, of course. It's like post-post-sharkjumpism or something. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Designer Diane von Furstenberg on Hillary Clinton: "I support Hillary because I believe she will do the best job in the White House. I do know her a little and like her very much. She is intelligent, diligent, micro and macro, and she truly cares." [WWD, 2nd item]

• Kenneth Cole is not returning to the runways anytime soon because he doesn't feel "runway ready," or just can't bother justifying the expense to his shareholders, or whatevs. [WWD, 1st item]
• Hilary Duff is set to launch her second fragrance, With Love. (More apt name: With Greed.) [BellaSugar]
• Paris' infamous boutique Colette, which, depending on your point of view, is the most pretentious/awesome store in all the universe, is partnering with H&M to carry the cheap chain's Fashion Against AIDS collection, the first time H&M has allowed another retailer to stock its merchandise. The line includes design collaborations with famous designers like The Cardigans, Ziggy Marley, Rihanna, Good Charlotte, Jade Jagger, My Chemical Romance, Rufus Wainwright, the Scissor Sisters, and Timbaland. [Fashion Week Daily]

• Target might have lost Isaac to Liz Claiborne, but it looks like they're about to gain the designing powers of hot English designer Jonathan Saunders for the GO International line. [Vogue UK]
• Juliette Binoche is selling Lancome now. [Chic Report]
• And Diesel is selling bed linens now! [WWD, sub req'd]
• Christian Louboutin and his red-undersided shoes will be the sole focus of an upcoming exhibit at the Museum at FIT in New York. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Neiman Marcus commercials from 1985! [Sassybella]
• Laura Ashley to take over Moss Brothers? [NYT]
• Burberry: Stock might be dropping, but revenues are rising. Oh, the chavs. Gotta love 'em. [WWD, sub req'd]

They say: "He's sure to reciprocate in an adorable gingham shirt and a perfect hoodie."
We say: Straight men don't wear gingham and snug hoodies. Why? Because they don't know what gingham is.

They say: "It's your job to keep him in style, and a Psycho Bunny, Sovereign Beck, NOLA Couture, or corduroy tie will surely do the trick."
We say: Corduroy tie? How... Anderson Cooper at age 12!

They say: "So he's not entirely tactful, and he likes his thrills cheap. But you love the guy. He'll be in hog heaven with MarieBelle's pinup girl chocolate bars..."
We say: Straight men want good old-fashioned porn they can watch, not retro sex-symbols in the form of chocolate molds.

They say: "...send him to the beach in Billabong's wet suit/MP3 player to hang loose, dude."
We say: A zipperless piece of body-hugging "silk touch" jersey? Uh, it probably isn't the waves he's cruising.

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