Her name was Shaka and we were in the fifth grade when I decided to kick her square in the stomach. Even though I had a huge crush on her, Shaka’s pain did not matter to me. It didn’t matter to our laughing peers either. Shaka’s pain was irrelevant as I asserted my prepubescent norms of courting. Television shows like

As the police, protestors and media go head to head in Baltimore over Freddie Gray’s death from injuries he sustained while in police custody—that he allegedly gave himself—it’s tough for everyone. It’s especially tough for anyone who’s been brutalized by cops. Anyone like me.