In this first commercial, which Margaret posted last week, the woman promoting the shoes is checked out twice by the cameraman, who just can't help but zoom in on her backside. "Excuse me," she says to the cameraman as he blatantly checks her out, "I take it you agree?" She then smiles as if being objectified by some cameraman is the best thing in the world. Charming.
Here, the shoes show a female body, without a face, to promise that using the shoes will ensure that "88% of men will be speechless, 76% of jealous, and 0% will know the reason is on your feet." Because those are the only reasons women care about fitness, right? Not because heart disease is the number one killer of women, and not because they want to live healthy lifestyles and feel good about themselves, silly! Women only work out for the benefit of men and to ensure that other ladies are "just jealous."

This super classy ad, the worst of them all, shows a woman's breasts—and only her breasts—complaining about being jealous of her butt, which has improved since she started using EasyTone sneakers. "Make your boobs jealous!" a male announcer says at the end of the commercial. So now it's not even enough to make other women jealous, you have to make your own body parts turn against each other. My boobs actually felt sorry for my brain when it had to process the amount of bullshit in these three ads, and my eyes were jealous of my toes for being tucked deep in my socks, away from this sexist mess. Thanks, but no thanks, Reebok. You can kiss my butt, and my money, goodbye.

• Madonna's fall campaign for Louis Vuitton leaked online, and the star — captured by Steven Meisel and 23 psychedelic Photoshop layers — sort of looks like a marble statue. [Fashionologie]

• Roberto Cavalli's and Gianfranco Ferré's Fall 2009 campaigns are also out. In the sense of "On the Internet," not in the sense of "In the magazines." [FWD]
• 50 Cent's new fragrance deal, for the scent "Power", is unusual in that the star is not simply licensing his name to a company. He actually is a part-owner of Lighthouse Beauty, the business that will release Power. The other partners are a veritable who's-who of the fragrance industry. [WWD]
• Clements Ribeiro is the latest British fashion house to announce its intention to return to London Fashion Week for its 25th anniversary. The husband-and-wife design duo join Burberry, Pringle of Scotland, Jonathan Saunders, and Matthew Williamson, in showing their respective Spring 2010 collections in London. Clements Ribeiro last showed in London in September 2005. [Telegraph]
• Expectant Victoria's Secret superstar Adriana Lima's wedding to Marko Jaric was witnessed only by the couple's lawyers. "It was really romantic," said the model. Lima said she doesn't know the sex of her baby, due in December, and hopes to have a large family. [People]
• eLuxury.com is closing its doors as a retailer today. (Last-minute sale items are an additional 50% off, so if you want Alexander Wang jeans for $375 $75, or a D&G corset dress for $495 $148.50, now's your moment.) Apparently, eLuxury is planning to relaunch itself as a social networking site dedicated to...luxury. Because in this economy, talking about fancy shit online is still free. [WWD]
• Supermodel Angela Lindvall has designed a t-shirt for Edun, Ali Hewson's organic, sustainably-produced fashion line (which is newly owned by luxury mega-company LVMH). The shirt is blue with a white design that Lindvall says "was created from the shadows of trees. Our shadow side is what sometimes pushes us to grow." [Fashionista]
• Style.com traced the influence of Kate Moss's gold lamé Marc Jacobs dress and Stephen Jones turban from the Met Ball through the Resort collections. As if we were ever in any doubt that Ms. Moss's style cuts a long swath. [Style.com]
• Patrick Dempsey's new scent for Avon (?!) is to be appropriately named: Patrick Dempsey 2. [WWD]
• The first rule of working for fashion publicist Kelly Cutrone is: Do not blog about Kelly Cutrone. When the fashion publicist caught one of her summer interns — an NYU student, natch — writing about her online, she took the girl aside and said: "I'm going to sue the fuck out of your family if you don't take it down immediately and your college tuition is going to seem like a pittance after you face my wrath." [The Cut]
• Reebok is launching a maternity division for its NFL line. [WWD]
• Michelle Obama wore Lanvin yesterday, should you care. [The Cut]
• Brooke Burke, her fiancé, and her four kids, ages 1, 2, 7, and 9, are going to do a Skechers ad as one big happy family. No word on how much the clan nets. [WWD]
• Zac Posen did his part for Gen Art at the fashion incubator's fund-raiser Wednesday night. Also? Zac Posen is totally that guy at the art opening who'll say, "I like the Sol LeWitt technique put into something figurative..." [Style.com]
• Escada, the struggling fashion house who earlier this year announced its debt had risen to €187.6 million, and its cash on hand had dwindled to just €24.7 million, is about to launch the €200 million bond-exchange program the company hopes will raise it enough cash to emerge from this recession intact. Bondholders, starting Monday, will be encouraged to exchange their old bonds for new ones, at an early-bird rate of €400 in new bonds per €1,000 in old bonds previously held. (After July 14, the bond exchange will net bondholders €375 per €1,000 in debt.) The exchange will only go forward if 80% of bondholders agree to it, but the company says all the preconditions are set. Its two major shareholders, the billionaire brothers Wolfgang and Michael Herz, who together own 24.9% of Escada, are on board. [WWD]
• Hartmarx has won court approval to be sold to the private equity firm Emerisque Brands. Emerisque bid $128.4 million for the bankrupt men's clothier, and pledged to retain many of the company's 4,000, mostly Chicago-based, workers. Biggest creditor Wells Fargo bank had argued that Hartmarx should be liquidated to cover its $261 million debt. [NYTimes]
• Customs and Border Patrol seized 10,900 pairs of counterfeit Nike shoes off the docks in Los Angeles. The imitation shoes had a face value of $1.8 million. [WWD]

• The Gossip played an hour-long set at the Paris Fendi party. Beth Ditto stripped off the five-piece stage costume Lagerfeld made her until she was performing in a sequined bra and thong. [Telegraph]

• Chanel's show at the Grand Palais in Paris was an appropriately star-studded affair, with Freida Pinto, Kate Moss, Olga Kurylenko and current Karl-favorite Claudia Schiffer in the front row. The models — basically a supermodel round-up, including several of the designer's former muses, like Karen Elson and Angela Lindvall — walked through a maze-like set that Lagerfeld designed himself. (Lindvall said they rehearsed the choreography three times.) Asked how it was that he got into the maze himself for the finale, the Kaiser said, "That I don't know and it's a strange thing. It happens to me often early in the mornings. I get into the middle of mazes and come out of completely nowhere!" [FWD]
• Alexander McQueen has heard your talk of recession-friendly safe fashion, and he bites his thumb at you. "I think it's dangerous to play it safe because you will just get lost in the midst of cashmere twin sets," said the designer, whose show was a vicious-minded mash-up of iconic fashions, played out on a set whose centerpiece was a crumbling, blackened heap of his own old set props. "People don't want to see clothes. They want to see something that fuels the imagination." [NY Times]
• This is the kind of gross original concept with a high potential for backfire: when launching a new cologne, how about not throw a crowded party and only allow guests into a backroom, one by one, to smell the scent — on a live male model? "It's really starting to smell in there," muttered someone who would have preferred, oh, I don't know, tester bottles. [WWD]
• Page Six is reporting that Anna Wintour shook hands with PETA vice-president Dan Matthews at the Stella McCartney show in Paris. Sees unlikely, given PETA's extra-vocal protests this season — French Vogue editor Carine Roitfeld's Balenciaga dress had its sleeve ripped off by PETA operatives, who presumably were trying to target her goat coat — and the animal-rights organization's own history with Wintour. (Once, PETA dumped an animal carcass on the editor's plate in a restaurant. Wintour calmly placed her napkin over it and asked to see the dessert menu.) But, strange things happen in fashion, so... [P6]
• The 80s are definitely back. Leighton Meester's first Reebok ad is out — and she's posing next to a boom box that looks like it takes about 19 D batteries. [Sassybella]
• Liskula Cohen, the former Vogue model suing Google in an attempt to force the company's Blogger service to reveal the identity of a user who posts scathing content about her, broke down in court when some of the offending posts were read into the record. The blog Skanks in NYC is entirely dedicated to smearing Cohen, alleging she has no soul, and calling her "desperate," a "ho," and a "skank" many times, and Cohen's aim is to pursue a defamation suit against the author, should he or she be revealed. The lawyer representing the anonymous site called the posts "youthful, jocular, slangy comments." [NYDN]
• That's Shalom Harlow, Eva Herzigova, and Vincent Gallo (yeah, wtf?) in the spring H&M ads. [Fabsugar]
• Katie Holmes told Glamour that she is currently in talks to start a children's clothing line with her friend and stylist Jeanne Yang. [Hollyscoop]
• Meanwhile, the Jonas brothers want the tween clothing market. [WWD]
• And is Heidi Klum thinking that grown women will buy Barbie-inspired duds? [The Cut]
• Christian-owned knockoff emporium Forever 21 sold an unauthorized t-shirt with the logo of punk band Minor Threat screen printed into a thicket of generic 80s imagery. Dischord Records, Minor Threat's label, objected — and in a surprise twist ending, the shirts have actually been pulled from store shelves. [Pitchfork]
• An Indonesian company that produces around 500,000 pairs of Adidas shoes every month has been sued by its main local creditors, the Bank of Negara Indonesia and a leather wholesaler, after an ongoing dispute over the shoe factory's unpaid bills. [UPI]
• After profits declined 45.1% in 2008, luxury Italian jeweler and perfumer Bulgari will cut jobs, close stores, and eliminate unprofitable product lines. [WWD]
• Eric Gaskins, a New York-based couturier whose wares have been worn by Salma Hayek and Tina Fey, among others, has been forced to file for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection after 22 years in business. Gaskins is one of the most prominent high-end African-American designers in the US. [Crain's]
• Net profits at Swatch fell 17.4% in 2008. [WWD]

• Katie Holmes is the new face of Miu Miu. Srsly? [New York Magazine]
• Marc Jacobs' company has been accused of bribing a state official so the designer "could get a desirable venue for his fashion show." They're paying $1 million in fines. [TMZ]
• In happier news, Marc is open to marriage! Even if California isn't. “I refuse to let anyone tell me who I can and cannot marry, and who I can and cannot love. That’s just bullshit...Wherever we’d have to go. If he’s up for it, I’m up for it.” [New York Magazine]
• Are women overreacting about American Apparel's latest ads? Reverse Cowgirl's Susannah Breslin thinks so. Personally, I just hate leggings as pants! Seriously, we're talking blouses tucked into leggings, kids. [Reverse Cowgirl]
• Jessica Biel is not, we repeat, not, designing handbags for William Rast. [Fashionista via People]

• Steve & Barry's files for bankruptcy for second time. [WWD]
• Leighton Meester continues the strange Gossip Girl cast-sneaker trend as she becomes the new face of Reebok. [Fashionista]
• Karl Lagerfeld just designed a piece of French currency. "The limited-edition collector’s coin, which features Chanel’s signature quilted pattern on one side and the head of Coco Chanel on the other, was created to commemorate the 125th anniversary of Ms. Chanel’s birthday." [WSJ]
• Celeb spawn Julia Restoin-Roitfeld and Dakota Johnson Griffith are the new models for Mango. [WWD]
• Diane Von Furstenberg: "My mission is to make women feel more confident. I do it through fashion. I do it through philanthropy. I do it through everything I do. I didn't know what I wanted to do when I grew up, but I knew the kind of woman I wanted to become and I became that woman: an independent woman who was in the driving-seat. Because I am in fashion I have given other women tools to become that also." [Telegraph]
• In a rather less vague example of this, Eileen Fisher gives out this year's Business Grants: “With the credit market tightening and small businesses finding it increasingly difficult to secure financing, it is important to support woman entrepreneurs more than ever." [WWD]
• PETA comes down hard on "bunny butcher" Donna Karan. [Racked]
• George David, the ahem "colorful" head of Marks & Spencer's Per Una brand, steps down. [Guardian]
• In other M&S news: this affordable bespoke shirt idea seems genius. [Telegraph]
• Sarah Palin sports wrist corsage to Alaska's birthday party. From her date?! [LA Times]
• Meanwhile at his own birthday party, Christian Siriano — "pausing for impromptu dance-offs with friends and later, grinning over platters of cupcakes festooned with sparklers" — was feted by the MisShapes. [Observer]
• Many are boycotting Australian wool because of a "barbaric" process designed to prevent maggots; wool producers say there's no alternative. [Reuters]
• Naomi Campbell to host Miami photo retrospective...of herself. [Yahoo]
• The Limited experiences major net fall. [WSJ]
• How to accessorize your Prada phone? The Prada Link, of course — "a braceletlike leather and metal timepiece that alerts Prada phone users to calls and SMS messages." [WWD]
• Proenza Schouler designer Lazaro Hernandez raises his own turkeys, which for some reason, makes sense. [New York]
• Recycled soda can lingerie. Green? Sure. Cool? Very. Comfy? Yeah, not so much. [InventorSpot]
• On the Sonia Rykiel retrospective: "She did conceptualism before the conceptualists, Japanese before the Japanese, minimalism before the minimalists. So in a way she smoothed the way for all movements in contemporary fashion." Well, il faut pas exaggerer! [Guardian]

• Sean Combs's new fragrance, "I Am King" will premiere as a Macy's exclusive in December. 'I Am King is a statement about all men,” said Combs, during an interview at his Bad Boy Entertainment offices in Manhattan. “We are all descendents of royalty — and if we carry ourselves and respect ourselves in that manner and believe in ourselves, then we are all kings." The new fragrance, he says, is "more about sophistication. It’s strong and also sexy, with an elegance and simplicity to it.” [WWD]
• More on how design chief Patrick Robinson is trying to make The Gap cool. Can't they just...you know, carry better clothes? [Business Week]
• Lydia Hearst says she's not like Paris Hilton, ruins it by calling herself a "supermodel." "Don't ever compare New York media heiress Lydia Hearst to Paris Hilton. "Remember: I am a supermodel and have the award to prove it, and she is a celebrity. There's no comparison." [Page Six]

• Oy. Armchair activists Benetton bring their usual brand of asinine commentary to the Beijing Olympics. "Benetton on Friday took out double-page advertising spreads in a number of leading news dailies worldwide, showing a Tibetan monk and a Chinese soldier praying face to face under the word 'Victims.'" They also show pictures of Sichuan earthquake victims (Benetton supports the Red Cross) and explain that their work “attempts to make a small contribution to dialogue and engagement between Tibetan and Chinese people." [WWD]
• Judge awards LVMH huge payout from Canadian counterfeiters. [WWD]
• Bollywood spawn makes like Hollywood spawn, launches clothing line. Riddhima Kapoor, daughter of well known Bollywood actors Neetu and Rishi Kapoor, has names her line"ARA"."My collection makes a girl look hot. It is sensual but, at the same time, it's not at all vulgar. You just have to be yourself in these clothes," [Hindustan Times]
• Philllips de Pury & Co are hosting an auction of "hip hop's crown jewels" including bling "sported by 50 Cent, Biz Markie, MC Lyte, Kanye West and the late Notorious B.I.G and Tupac Shakur." [Fashion Week Daily"]
• The popular kids aren't shopping either! Along with Hot Topic, Abercrombie and Fitch, American Eagle sales are down. [Wall Street Journal]
• Designers Amy Molyneaux and Percy Parker are dressing phones. "BlackBerry smartphones are now an integral part of everyday life, so it's great to be given the opportunity to add some extra glamour to the way in which they can be carried," explain the design duo, who have taken inspiration from BlackBerry's magenta, silver and midnight blue colour palette."We've taken the stunning colours from the new summer range and really brought them to life through our pouch design. The combination pouch and handset will make even the most stylish fashionista stand out." [VogueUK]
• Andre 3000 has made it. Into The Sartorialist. [The Sartorialist]
• Polo profits up. I guess the rich are different! [WWD]
• And Ralph Lauren is sensitive about his age. [WWD]
• The same people who let all those fashionistas DJ are now letting them make films. "The aim of the project is to give stars of the fashion world the opportunity to show off their clothes and the spirit of their label in any way they see fit. Among the line-up of participants are Pierre Hardy, Peter Jensen, Todd Lynn and Rodarte. Each designer has produced a film between 30 seconds and three minutes long - and judging from the stills that we've seen each promises to be quite a spectacle." [ElleUK]
• Reebok is teaming up with toy co. Hasbro to launch a Monopoly sneaker. I want the thimble. [Fashionista]

• Marc Jacobs wants a reality show, and Project Runway's Tim Gunn wants it for him. "The whole thing's sort of egotistical, I suppose, but I do find myself entertaining," says Jacobs. And says Gunn, "God knows Marc has a fascinating life, and he looks great. I'd watch." Well, if it has Tim's vote... [NY Mag]
  
• Marc Jacobs' kidswear line Little Marc is opening up a little store. [WWD, 5th item]
  
• Sex and the City wardrobe spoiler. Says Patricia Field: "Without giving too much away, there is a shoe from Dior that Carrie wears all the time that I am sure will be on fire... My intention in the movie was to approach it realizing that four or five years have passed... there are little twists on Carrie that will be an opposite approach from the image we have of her, like a heavier shoe or studs." [WWD, 2nd item]

• Jason Schwartzman is the new face of indie fashion label Band of Outsiders. Is that name sort of self-awareness wrapped in irony wrapped in self-awareness wrapped in sincerity? Or is Jason Schwartzman just a bad fit? [WWD, 2nd item]
• Fila has launched a contest on its website, asking brand-devotees to submit photos of themselves that answer the question "How do you Fila?" Not that it's an invitation for teenage boys to submit photos of themselves "fila"-ing up girls who are "fila"-ing horny or anything. [MediaPost]
• Kohl's, meanwhile, answers this question and says, "With us!" A new Fila for Kohl's line will be in stores next fall. [WSJ]
• Giorgio Armani visited Australia this weekend so he could, um, bond with the beneficiaries of the "biggest single financial donation to an Australian theatrical institution," his declaration of "patronage" to the Sydney Theatre Company, helmed by Cate Blanchett. [WWD, sub req'd]
• And in other self-congratulatory Armani-speak, Giorgio also says, "Cary Grant is still the man. He managed to look good in a suit even while running across a field being chased by a plane. My friend George Clooney has that quality too - he looks effortlessly smart whatever he is wearing. I'm flattered that he chooses to wear my designs." [Vogue UK]
• Valentino: Also humble! "People say, 'Oh, Mr. Valentino, fashion without you is very sad.'" [Fashion Week Daily]
• Damon Dash-better half Rachel Roy just got an undisclosed amount of funding from TSM, a firm that also just purchased 22% of English label Matthew Williamson. Not sure why she needs the money, but, ha ha, just kidding. [Vogue UK]
• Bebe: No longer designing with fur! PETA likes this! Bebe: Still selling fur! PETA does not like this. [PETA]

• Poseur/artiste Damien Hirst is not only attending the "hotly-anticipated" Prada party during New York Fashion Week, he's designing the giant skull-shaped mirror that will be enhancing the store's decor the night of the party as well. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• Somewhere there is a decree that Stella McCartney is infallible regarding the rights of animals and the environment and if you commit the heresy of questioning this she will bite. [Vogue UK]
  
• "The collection is many women. She is strong, hard working, sincere, purposeful, intelligent, easygoing, chic, professional, edgy, happy, a mother, a friend, a single woman, a hippie spirit," Rachel Roy on the woman who represents her upcoming Spring/Summer 2008 collection. In other words, anyone with two breasts and a credit card. [The Fashion Informer]

• Kelly Klein is having a baby, something that never happened while the sometime-photographer was married to her now-ex, Calvin Klein. [Page Six]
• "I wanted something memorable and sweet. It started with a drawing of a deer. I changed the "deer" to "dear." You know, something that's dear to you," says Amanda Bynes, on the name of her Steve & Barry's clothing line. Wow, Amanda. We had no idea until you told us that that's what "dear" means. [Houston Chronicle]
• Project Runway! At last! November 14 we will be reunited with Heidi, Tim, Nina, and Michael. [FabSugar]
• OMG. Vintage Reebok. Revived. Go look. Now. [FabSugar]
• Seattle Post-Intelligencer]
• The CEO of Rock & Republic has been charged with sexual harassment by a former employee. And by "sexual harassment" we mean she has accused him of attempted rape. Just putting that out there. [TMZ]

Scarlett Hearts RBK Sweatshirt [Reebok store]
Women's Fashion Sweatshirt [WalMart]

Related: At Risk Of Diluting Brand Among Tastemakers Of sub-Saharan Africa, Scarlett Donates 2,000 Pairs Of Her Ugly Shoes To The Sudan. [PopCrunch]
WalMart: Off With Their Smocks! [BusinessWeek]