• Robert Pattinson freaked out when a fan jumped out of a car at a red light and kissed him explaining, "My mom wouldn't pull the car over to let me out because I'm just getting over the swine flu…"

• Pattinson shoved the girl off of him and yelled "You have the swine flu?!… What the hell are you doing kissing anyone?" Then he went to the nearest drug store and bought some Listerine. This story was brought to you by the National Enquirer and quite possibly, the letters B and S. [News.com.au]
• Jon Gosselin was in court today to face a former lawyer who is suing him for non-payment. [Radar Online]
• Sources say Jon and Kate Gosselin's final divorce decree will be issued today or tomorrow. Also, after photos surfaced of Jon shooting a handgun on his lawn in Pennsylvania yesterday, a judge ordered Jon not to bring a firearm onto the property he and Kate own. [Radar Online]
• Charles Fradenburg, Kurt Cobain's uncle, said his sister Wendy O'Connor has been trying to get custody of Frances Bean Cobain for many years because Courtney Love " is not fit to take care of Frances, she can barely take care of herself ... Courtney wasn't doing any parenting at all, she was hiring nannies to do all of the work." [TMZ]
• This is just sad although take it with a grain of salt: Theresa Rogers claims that Tiger Woods told her during their affair that he only married Elin Nordegren to boost his public image. [Radar Online]
• A resident of Windermere, Florida says Tiger Woods heads to a nearby course and hits golf balls "to clear his head" at night. "He goes after dark so he can't be seen. For him, what's more therapeutic than hitting golf balls, the thing he's best at in the whole world?" says the source. [Us]
• Erin Muller got her ex Michael Lohan arrested on Monday for violating her restraining order, so he had her arrested today for allegedly kicking him in the head on November 14. He says he wanted to get her out of her car because she was "too drunk and high" to drive. [TMZ]
• Kevin Jonas will marry Danielle Deleasa this weekend on Long Island. [Radar Online]
• Red Hot Chili Peppers guitarist John Frusciante quit the group for a second time because, he says, "my musical interests have led me in a different direction." [Reuters]
• Amanda Seyfried is now too big for Big Love. "She's been exploring her movie career for a couple of years now, and we've been giving her a lot of room to do that," says Big Love creator Will Scheffer. "I know having a commitment to a show for six months definitely cuts into her ability to pursue that career." At the end of the season, her character will move away. [TV Guide]
• The executors of Michael Jackson's will are asking the court for "extraordinary compensation" rather than the usual executors fee because they've had to defend the estate against both Joe and Katherine Jackson and hey've been working 14 hours a day, 7 days a week to sort out MJ's finances. [TMZ]
• Steven Burky has been charged with two counts of felony stalking for allegedly breaking a restraining order Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner filed against him last year. Garner says he's been stalking her since 2002 and he was arrested earlier this week outside Violet Affleck's school. [TMZ]
• Ashanti's mother Tina Douglas testified today against Devard Hurd, the man accused of sending Ashanti's family members pictures of his genitals and text messages about having sex with her. "It was just disgusting and humiliating and extremely frightening," Douglas said. [AP]
• LeeLee Sobieski gave birth to her first child with her fiance, menswear designer Adam Kimmel ,late last night. They're keeping the name under wraps for now. [Us]
• Tom Brady was asked how week one went for his new baby with Gisele Bunchen. "It's good. It's good. I'm glad it's over!" said Tom. "I'm trying to get back to my normal sleep schedule, which I'm sure, for all of us parents, is a little tough early." [People]
• Oprah Winfrey donated $1.5 million to the Ron Clark Academy, a private middle school in inner-city Atlanta. Last December Oprah donated $365,000 to the school. [AP]
• Loretta Lynn cancelled a string of shows and insiders say its because she has the flu and is "fighting for her life." "Loretta's stubborn. She wanted to play the dates, but her doctors told her point-blank she needed to rest for weeks," says a source. "But Loretta insists, 'You tell me I can't sing anymore, you might as well dig the hole and throw dirt on me.'" [Contact Music]
• Melanie Griffith's rep announced that she had surgery to remove early stage skin cancer from her face. The procedure was done early enough to prevent more complications. [AP]
• Lady Gaga says her song "Dance In The Dark" is about "a girl who likes to have sex with the lights off, because she's embarrassed about her body. She doesn't want her man to see her naked. She will be free, and she will let her inner animal out, but only when the lights are out... These lyrics are a way for me to talk about how I believe women and some men feel innately insecure about themselves all the time. It's not sometimes, it's not in adolescence, it's always." [MTV]
• 1.42 million people watched Tuesday's episode of Bad Girls Club, making it Oxygen's highest-rated non-finale show ever. [Media Week]
• Guy Ritchie says he wanted to make sure Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law were friends before they started shooting Sherlock Holmes. "What was essential to me is that when these guys first met as mates that they really got on with one other, and they did — within five seconds," Ritchie said . "Rudy [Downey Jr.] and Judy [Law] and I had a lot of late nights in the pub." [CNN]
• Jude Law says he regrets changing his name from David Law because, "(I was) assigned to the girls' dormitories and sleeping quarters when I was a teenager and I joined the National Youth Music Theatre. Someone took a look at my name and clearly thought, 'It has to be a girl.' How wrong can you get?" [Daily Express]
• Q: "So when are you going to be made a Sir?" Hugh Grant: "You would assume it's around the corner. No, I'm pretty hated in my own country, sadly. I love it, it hates me." [Popeater]
• Hugh Grant says that in Did You Hear About The Morgans, "I look ridiculous. I look like some old lesbian." [CBS News]
• Sarah Ferguson, who produced The Young Victoria, says the character she relates to most in the film is, "Prince Albert, because I know what it's like to be a guest. It is very difficult when you are not born in to it, to fit in to a life that you cannot logically understand. [Those born to it] are born to duty and to be selfless to the grave." [Reuters]
• "I had a girl come up to me once with a sunflower, like, she just came running up to me, and she just wanted to say thanks for being in Almost Famous. I was like, 'Thank Cameron Crowe!' And I thank him every day, I do. That experience for me was like growing up. So thank you for asking about it, and feeling so strongly about it, because that film was a huge part of my life, too." — Kate Hudson [Nylon]
• "As I look back, I've always been so proud of what I've been able to do in film. It was sort of by default that I created this strong identity or the voice of the misfit or the disenfranchised or the outsider. For me, I just look for complexity. Even in the early years, like in the '90s, I was just looking for interesting roles or working with filmmakers that allowed me to bring more to the table than these cookie-cutter youth roles. And particularly being a young female, they usually were a daughter who is pretty in-the-box, like, "Precocious Girl!" or the girlfriend — "She's desirable! She's on the cusp of womanhood!" — or whatever these boring things were." — Juliette Lewis [USA Today]
• "I always get thrown out of the set, because asking for too many takes. I have a problem with that. I cannot let go. I cannot say 'OK, now we can stop and move to the next thing...' I drive everybody crazy because I can't control myself. I always want to do one more." — Penelope Cruz [Daily Express]
• When asked how her beauty routine has changed over the years, Cate Blanchett said, "Back then, I'd go to bed with my makeup on if I'd been out. And I went through a big Gothic phase, so my pillow was always covered in black mascara and white pancake makeup." [People]
• One of Demi Moore's Twitter followers wrote after seeing a recent picture of her, "Sorry but, you look old... specially your neck and cheecks [sic] at the second shot... i'm really sorry." She replied: "I'm 47, how am I supposed to look?." [Daily Mail]

• After nine days in a burn center, Travis Barker has been released from the hospital and is heading back to L.A. By bus. A friend says: "He will never fly again – ever." [People]
• Shanna Moakler is sticking by her ex-husband, because they still love each other. Also: "He's not in good shape," a source says. "It's very serious." He's headed to a hospital in the L.A. area. [People]
• Here's a picture of DJ AM, who left his home yesterday to attend a memorial service for Travis Barker's assistant. AM has clearly visible burns, but seems to be able to walk. [TMZ, People]
• Actress Joely Fisher and husband Chris Duddy have adopted a baby girl from South Central Los Angeles. The infant is an African-American girl they've named Olivia. A family friend says: "Joely and Chris were inspired by Angelina and Madonna's decisions to adopt a baby from Africa. But after looking into the adoption process, they realized there were so many children in the L.A. area who needed homes." Word. [Star]
• What's this? Brad and Angelina looking to adopt a kid from a Latin American country? Two months after having twins? Ay dios mio. [Daily Mail]

• Christina Applegate talked to Oprah about her double mastectomy. She says she didn't cry at first. "And then when I met with my doctor and I told him that was my decision and he brought the surgeon in and it was like the flood gates just opened up and I – I lost it." [People]
• Janet Jackson canceled her concert in Montreal on Monday after she "got suddenly ill." She was rushed to the hospital. Think it was a hangover from Jermaine Dupri's birthday party? As you'll recall, he vomited on her lap. [Yahoo News]
• Robert Redford on his late friend and co-star, Paul Newman: "This was a man who lived a life that really meant something and will for some time to come." ABC News]
• Here's a collection of quips by Paul Newman. [Chicago Sun-Times]
• Miley Cyrus decided to take over Disneyland for her 16th birthday bash, but the date she wants happens to be the Gay Day celebration at the theme park. So: Miley in, gays out. [Perez Hilton]
• Britney may have won an MTV award for her "Piece Of Me" video, but she doesn't even think it's that great. "It's a cool video, but I think by far I've done videos that are way better," she says. "So I was really shocked that ... it got the award." As were we, dear. As were we. [AP]
• Despite what you might have heard, there is no Britney sex tape. Says a source close to Britney. [E!]
• Britney's in New York, btw. [The.Life Files]
• Plug your ears: Jessica Simpson is going to sing on Dancing With The Stars. [UPI]
• Naomi Watts turned 40 on Sunday, and she got a big present from her man, Liev Schreiber: A Mercedes-Benz Bluetec, the new, environmentally friendly luxury SUV. [E!]
• Two people involved in an accident that injured Shia LaBeouf were charged Monday with giving police false information about the wreck. There was a young couple in the other car; apparently the woman said she was driving, but the man was behind the wheel. [Yahoo News]
• Lauren Conrad: Seen making out with My Boys actor Kyle Howard. [E!]
• LC and Audrina are not "Top Friends" on MySpace. But trying to make news out of someone's MySpace mood is dumb. [Perez Hilton]
• All My Sons was the highest-grossing (non-musical) play on Broadway last week. Is Katie Holmes to thank? [AP]
• Ashlee Simpson sleeps with so many teddy bears there's hardly room for Pete Wentz in the bed. [Perez Hilton]
• Eva Longoria continues to wear flowy tops and drink water instead of cocktails; gossipers continue to speculate that she is pregnant. [E!]
• Three words: Katy Perry doll. [NY Mag]
• Madonna's concert at Wembley stadium ran over the time allotted, so she has to pay a £135,000 fine. Pocket change for Her Madgesty! [Guardian]
• David Beckham will be a character in a series of books that will bring children to reading through, um, soccer. [The Sun, Telegraph]
• The "poor" chick on Gossip Girl hangs with high society in real life. [Page Six]
• Renee Zellweger and Harry Connick Jr bring an uplifting movie about a breast-cancer drug to Lifetime. [Village Voice]
• Does Sophia Bush read Jezebel? In Health magazine she says: "It's weird: In our business, I'm a size 2 and considered curvy. It's important to remind young women, 'Listen, even skinny girls have cellulite, even Halle Berry has cellulite, and what you see in photos isn't totally real.'" [People]
• Keira Knightley does not drink, do drugs or smoke (really?) but she does curse up a storm. "I've a foul mouth like my mum," she says. [Mirror]
• Shocker: Black people like singer Robin Thicke even though he is white. [Newser]
• Traci Bingham is bringing a new show to Fox. "It's like America's Next Top Model," she says, "only they'll act, and perform and be athletic, as well." The difference is that Traci won't make fun of the contestants like Tyra does: "Don't you hate that?" [E!]
• Elisabeth Hasselbeck is "really upset" about the election conversations on The View, and Barbara Walters has had to call a powwow with Hasselbeck, Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar. Can Babs make the ladies work it out? [Perez Hilton]
• Flea of the Red Hot Chili Peppers just enrolled as a freshman a the University of Southern California. He'll be studying music, of course. He should have gone to a Catholic school, since Catholic schoolgirls rule. [Perez Hilton]
• Demi Moore is suing a magazine that printed pictures of her and other celebrities at an Oscars party she hosted. [News.com.au]
• Country singer Mindy McCready will surrender to Tennessee authorities on today to start a 60-day jail sentence for violating probation on a previous drug-related charge. [Yahoo News]
• Kevin Costner will release his first album with his country-rock band, not that you give a shit. [People]
• More bad news for Ed McMahon: He's being sued by Merv Griffin's company. [USA Today]
• Ellen Burstyn has joined the cast of Showtime's Possible Side Effects, a drama set inside the world of the pharmaceutical industry. Tim Robbins is writing and directing. Diagnosis: Good! [Variety]
• Sadie Frost has swapped fashion for filmmaking. Her short film is about an evil nanny who terrorizes a single mother and daughter. [Mirror]
• "I've just written my first screenplay. It is pretty incredible to finish it — the first draft. I got somebody to teach me — there’s a programme called Final Draft. I had someone come round my house and teach me how to use it." — Geri Halliwell. [The Sun]
• "Listen, I’m a reasonable human being. If people pay me enough, I’ll stop playing my music." — James Blunt. [The Sun]
• "I convinced myself I was pregnant when I was 13 and I hadn’t even got my period. There are so many rumours and also so much wrong information being passed around, so it is a really important message the World Contraception Day is trying to give out. I am not the kind of person who talks about my sex life, but I am not afraid to talk about contraception. I go three, maybe four times a year to get tested for sexually transmitted infections and most of the time I don’t even need to. I just go for peace of mind." — Kelly Osbourne. [The Sun]
• "I’ve written some really, really deeply sexual things on some of the cards I’ve given him for opening night. But just to wind him up, you know. He’s great. He’s a truly remarkable man. You know, if I was gay or a female I’d, well, just want to marry him." — Daniel Radcliffe on his Equus co-star, Lorenzo Pisoni. [Daily Star]

[Malibu, September 4. Image via x17]

[Malibu, March 6. Image via x17]

[Malibu, California. Image via x17]

• Mary-Kate Olsen went to the emergency room yesterday and has been hospitalized with a kidney infection. She is currently "resting comfortably" and should be released in a day or so. [People]
  
• Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt and the brood will head "home" for Thanksgiving: Missouri, where Brad's family is. [MSNBC]
  
• Oh, and the Ethiopian biological mother of Zahara Jolie-Pitt says she conceived Zahara after being raped at knifepoint. Tragic. [Reuters]
  
• Heather Mills (McCartney), an adamant vegan, suggests we drink rats' milk instead of cow's milk, since livestock creates carbon emissions. Yum? [Telegraph]
  
• Apparently this rat milk idea was in an episode of The Simpsons but may not be viable. [Telegraph]

• Kate Moss gave Sienna Miller at talking-to regarding her new beau, Rhys Ifans, who is one of Kate's friends. "If you hurt Rhys, you'll have made an enemy for life," Kate warned. [Mirror]
• So you know how Amy Winehouse's tour manager quit because he claimed he tested positive for drugs, just from inhaling her secondhand smoke? Doctors say the chance of that actually happening is "a long shot." [ABC News]
• "Nearly broke" Michael Jackson is "struggling to put a roof over his head." The "sad-sack artist" and his kids, Prince, Paris and Blanket, stayed with billionaire Ron Burkle last week. Weird weird weird. [Page Six]
• Superman star Brandon Routh is getting married to longtime girlfriend Courtney Ford. Not on the registry: Kryptonite. [Page Six]
• The woman working the door at the American Music Awards afterparty didn't know who anyone was and didn't let anyone in, which resulted in a party of one: Chris Daughtry. Sad! [Page Six]
• Ashlee Simpson asked a photographer not to take a picture of her having a cigarette break outside Pete Wentz's East Village bar last week: "I don't want my fans knowing I smoke!" Haha, "fans." [Gatecrasher]
• The photographer Nicole Kidman testified against took the stand in Australia today, telling the court that when Nicole saw him trying to snap her picture, she told him to "fuck off." [Sydney Morning Herald]
• The government of Malawi is applauding Madonna's efforts to spotlight and raise money for AIDS orphans. Madonna is working with Gucci to raise $2 million for the one million orphans in Malawi. [Reuters]
• Blind item! "Which celebrity 'girlfriend' turned up solo at her actor beau's recent party because, several wags joked, he was still busy with his boyfriend?" [Gatecrasher, last item]
• Director Tim Burton on Johnny Depp's hair in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: He modeled it after that Vogue editor. Anna Wintower." [Rush & Molloy]
• Britney Spears is hiring a private eye to investigate ex-husband Kevin Federline, hoping to turn the custody battle around. Uphill battle, baby. [TMZ]
• The Red Hot Chili Peppers are suing cable network Showtime over their show Californication. The RHCP had an album and song of the same name in 1999 and say the show is trying to "steal [their] identity." [TMZ]