1.) Rasputin**
The Russian mystic's disembodied penis is on display at the Russian museum of erotica in Saint Petersburg, in a tall jar, measuring 11 inches—flaccid.

2.) Liam Neeson
In her autobiography No Lifeguard on Duty, Janice Dickinson wrote of her ex-boyfriend Liam Neeson, saying he had "the biggest penis of any man alive. He unzipped his pants and an Evian bottle fell out."

3.) Jay-Z
Accounts from several different groupies say that Jigga is well endowed, "The biggest dick you will ever see in your life, but boring. Huge. Like a one-liter Pepsi bottle. What do you call those things? The 20-ounce bottle. It's beyond huge. It could block the sun."

4.) John Holmes
Even though he had one of the most celebrated dicks in porn history, due to its size, there's no real documentation of his measurement. His manager claimed he was 13.5 inches, but Holmes' first wife said he measured it in front of her, before he started doing adult films, and it was 10 inches.

5.) Vincent Gallo
Have you ever seen Brown Bunny? (Link NSFW)

6.) Milton Berle
This rumor about how large his dick was has been around for a while, and at his Friars Club memorial in 2002, his friends joked about his size.

7.) Wilt Chamberlain
His nickname was "Big Dipper." He claims to have gotten a lot of use out of it.

8.) Tommy Lee
Thanks to the sex tape with then-wife Pamela Anderson, everyone has seen Tommy's peen. It's guesstimated to be about 8 inches, erect. (Link NSFW)

9.) Frank Sinatra
Ava Gardner once said of her ex-husband, "He only weighs 120, but 100 pounds is cock."

10.) Alexis Arquette
Some years before her sex reassignment surgery, Alexis had a lot of taping to do. (Link NSFW)

10.) President Johnson
"He was a lifelong exhibitionist who in college had dubbed his penis ‘Jumbo.'"

11.) Errol Flynn
He was notorious for his cock, which he once used to play the piano. A classical pianist!

12.) James Woods
That's the rumor, anyway, but we don't really care to find out definitively.

13.) Colin Farrell
It looks like a baby's arm. (Link NSFW)

14.) Peter Andre
Glamor model Jordan aka Katie Price says that her husband's penis is the size of a large television remote control.

15.) Anthony Keides
The girls on Metal Sludge—a site where groupies compare notes on the rock stars they've fucked—say the Red Hot Chili Peppers front man is a "very large" penis that is "beyond gorgeous."

16.) Tony Kanal
The girls on Metal Sludge also say that the No Doubt bassist—who is Gwen Stefani's ex—measures about 10 inches.

17.) Tony Danza
He's uncut and long. (Link NSFW)

18.) Ray J
Don't all guys with sex tapes that "leak" have big dicks? (Link NSFW)

19.) Dan Rather
The report on Rather is that "he is as hung as he is handsome and intelligent."

20.) Simon Rex
It's no wonder why he used to do porno.

P.S. Here's a preview of Hung:

*It is the personal opinion of the writer that big penises hurt.
**This list is not compiled by size order.

• Has the fighting between Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony has turned physical? Yes, according to Star.

An insider says "They love hard; they fight hard — and sometimes that has led to pushing and shoving." More in Midweek Madness. [Star]

• For the first time since her mother, brother and nephew were murdered, Jennifer Hudson will return to the spotlight: She'll sing the national anthem at the Super Bowl on February 1st. [E!]
• Mickey Rourke on 9/11: "President Bush was in the wrong place at the wrong time, I don't know how anyone could have handled this situation. I don't give a shit who's in office, Bush or whoever, there is no simple solution to this problem... I'm not one of those who blames Bush for everything. This shit between Christians and Muslims goes back to the Crusades, doesn't it. It's too easy to blame everything on one guy. These are unpredictable, dangerous times, and I don't think that anyone really knows quite what to do." [Telegraph via GQ]
• While shooting Revolutionary Road, Kate Winslet would bug hubby Sam Mendes about the film after work, during dinner. [Daily Express]
• Guess who hid in a bathroom and then got kicked out of a Golden Globes party for slipping in uninvited? Ms. Paris Hilton. How times have changed. [Gatecrasher]
• Some of you may find Josh Duhamel and Fergie's wedding invite — which came with a caricature of the couple fishing — cute, but it seems very cheesy and Six Flags souvenir booth. It's supposedly a "reflection of both of their personalities." The invite lady explains: "Fergie loves bling and has a love for unicorns and Josh loves nature. The artwork had leaves and hidden details like a unicorn and the invites were decorated with crystals." Go ahead, click and giggle. [People]
• Jared Leto spent Golden Globes night hitting on newly married ex-girlfriend Scarlett Johansson. [OK!]
• Are Kate Winslet's Oscar hopes in jeopardy due to Holocaust backlash over her Nazi role in The Reader? [Telegraph]
• Britney news! She has new digs. "I just took my babies to our new home and they loved it! I can't wait to move in," she wrote on her website. (Or was it a Harvard grad?) Anyway, her Studio City mansion is up for sale, if you have $7 million. [People]
• Liev Schreiber and Naomi Watts think that Nicole Kidman's daughter, Sunday, is after their first-born son, Alexander. "I think it's kind of weird and early, and I think she should back off, slow down and get her act together before that all happens," Liev says. He also says his son is "dishy." "I can say that about my son? The boy is really, really dishy." [News.com.au]
• Not So Blind Item: "Yes, that douchebag is leaving the TV show. But, wanna know the real reason? He's back on the drugs and alcohol, showing up late to work and being very unpleasant to work with. Is his homewrecking girlfriend gonna support him now???" [Perez]
• Talk about girl-on-girl crime: Heiress Casey Johnson got in a fight with her ex-girlfriend, Courtenay Semel (who was Lindsay Lohan's "roommate" and dated Tila Tequila) and Semel "beat the crap out of her and lit her hair on fire." Casey had to go to the hospital. [Page Six]
• Cue teen screams: Vanessa Hudgens might be in the next Twilight movie. [NY Daily News]
• Roman Polanski has no plans to ever return to the United States, according to a new filing, and his lawyer argues that Polanski does not need to be present for the court to rule on his motion to dismiss a three-decade-old rape charge. [AP]
• Amy Winehouse has been offered a movie role! She would play a music teacher in a "problem school," kind of like Michelle Pfeiffer's flick, Dangerous Minds. But Amy would have to "clean up her act." Do we think she can do it? [The Sun]
• Paula Abdul has changed her tune and is now saying of American Idol: "I am a big fan of the show. I am blessed to be on the show. It's the greatest show on television all around the world and ... a gazillion people would love to be in my shoes." Uh, weren't you just criticizing the show for putting your stalker on? "Well, that is true. But that's that. I can't talk about it anymore. It's an ongoing police investigation." [AP]
• Three baby-name experts have given the name Seraphina Rose Elizabeth Affleck (Ben and Jen's new baby) an A-minus, a B and a B. [AP]
• Dev Patel from Slumdog Millionaire once moved his drama teacher to tears when he played a child in a hostage crisis in Russia! [Telegraph]
• Wax on, wax off: Jackie Chan is in negotiations to star in a remake of The Karate Kid. The new flick would be relocated to China and Jaden Smith — Will's son — would be the bullied boy. Oh, and Will Smith is producing, naturally. Banzai. [Hollywood Reporter]
• By the by, Will Smith thinks he can be President. "Oh yes, when he's out of office in eight years." [Daily Express]
• We highly doubt that Coolio said that Madonna looks like "a bag of crisps," because he is a rapper from Compton and says chips. But anyway, the story goes that Coolio said: "Have you seen Madonna lately without make up? She’s like a fucking bag of crisps." [The Sun]
• Charlie Sheen's ex-wife, Denise Richards, and new wife, Brooke Mueller, are on "friendly terms" now. [Perez]
• The Osbournes are headed back to TV! This time they'll host Osbournes Reloaded, a variety show with skits, impersonations and audience games. [Reuters]
• Anne Heche: Expecting another son? [People]
• Captain Mike from The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button has filed for divorce. As an aside, his dad is the late Richard Harris, aka Dumbledore. [TMZ]
• OJ Simpson's former attorney, Robert Shapiro, says: "He’s a sociopath." Clarity! [Fox 411]
• LOL! Video of Macy Gray drunk. Thank Dionysus she got in the passenger side of that car. [ONTD via Hollywood.TV]
• Stevie Nicks and Fleetwood Mac: Going on tour for the first time since 2003. Stevie says the magic is still there and they're all excited to go on the road. Now everybody spin! [AP]
• Click if you want to see Lisa Marie Presley's twin girls, and read the words "time to paint Graceland pink." [People]
• Here's a very long story about how Emma "Baby Spice" Bunton lost her baby weight — "it's taken me a year." [Mirror]
• Did you know Rowan Atkinson (from Blackadder and Mr. Bean) once saved his family from a plane crash? "The pilot of the Cessna plane they were taking from Mombasa to Nairobi had passed out and despite a total lack of flying experience, Atkinson snatched the controls and slapped the pilot until he came round." [Daily Express]
• Mary J. Blige had an awesome birthday party in New York over the weekend, with her husband, Jay-Z, Beyoncé, Russell Simmons, Busta Rhymes, Stephon Marbury and a cake "so large that it had to be carried out by two people." [Page Six]
• Flavor Of Love is over, but VH1 felt it needed a replacement, so its new series is For The Love Of Ray J. You know, Brandy's brother? The dude in Kim Kardashian's sex tape? Yeah, I know: Downgrade. And when you're talking about Flavor Flav, it's hard to believe. [Concrete Loop]
• Click to see "Michelle Rodriguez Bin Laden." [The Life Files]
• Chaka Khan needs Activia yogurt, Miracle Whip and 2 ashtrays in her hotel room, among other things. [The Smoking Gun]
• "There are a lot of things I’m grateful for: my health, my family, my career, my family's health. We'll march on. We have to. There’s nothing you can do about it. You can't change what happened. Things could be worse. You remember that, and you go on with your life." — Kevin Bacon, on losing money due to Bernard Madoff's money scheme. [MSNBC via Life & Style]
• "I made love to a chicken in a cabaret in graduate school. It was called A Post-Apocalyptic Tryst. It really is the bravest thing I’ve ever done. I mean, honestly, I’m not that brave. But I did that in front of a lot of people. There wasn’t, like, penetration or anything, but I wined and dined the chicken, and then I made out with the chicken. The chicken wasn’t live; it was, like, a Perdue." — Liev Schreiber. [NY Mag]

• Ashlee Simpson, 23, is engaged to Fall Out Boy bassist Pete Wentz, 28. He got down on one knee; she said yes. Flat-iron-filled wedding to come! [In Touch Weekly]
  
• Is Ashlee pregnant? There's no evidence to that end, but whatever. [Us]
  
• Oh! Is Ashlee's team leaking Mariah Carey songs in hopes of creating less competition for Ashlee's album? Maybe this whole marriage thing is a publicity ploy too. [KBS Radio]
  
• Beyoncé's little sister Solange says "I don't know anything about [a wedding]. You'll have to ask her yourself." Also: B has a lot to learn when it comes to kids, says Solange (who is 21 and the mother of a 3-year-old). [People]
  
• Does The Hills star Audrina Patridge lock her bedroom door because she doesn't trust roomie Lauren Conrad? Lauren seems like one of those girls who would borrow clothes without asking first. [Page Six]

• Is Katie Couric planning on leaving CBS Evening News early? Does anyone watch her? [People]
• Angelina Jolie was discussing Iraq education policy in Washington DC on Tuesday when she "felt kicking suddenly." Is a career in politics in the future for her unborn (twins?)? [People]
• Bret Michaels has been named in a breach-of-contract lawsuit against the producers of Rock Of Love. The owner of the $9 million home where they filmed the series found holes in the walls and ceilings, dead plants, and missing doors. $380,000 worth of damage. No doubt stuff happened in that house that we don't even want to know about. [E!]
• Halle Berry's baby pix: Not coming to a celebrity weekly magazine. Yet. [MSNBC]
• Gwen Stefani doesn't know if her baby is a boy or a girl, and won't find out until delivery day — she and Gavin want it to be a surprise. Hopefully it's a girl she can dress up in wacky outfits. [People]
• Whitney Houston's young boyfriend, Ray J, has written a song about her. The lyrics: "Is that your wife, is that your shorty, well I'm her boyfriend... I think the problem is you don't beat it right... Making love is cool, just pull her hair sometimes." [Page Six]
• Pat O'Brien has just completed his second stint in rehab and will return to his show, The Insider. [Page Six]
• Despite that Iggy doggie fiasco, the Humane Society has praised Ellen DeGeneres for raising awareness of animal issues. [Page Six]
• No one likes racist oil heir Brandon Davis. [Page Six]
• A source claims Eliot Spitzer says his wife knew about his hooker habits and was like, "My fucking wife doesn't care, so why does anybody else care?" Tsk, tsk. [Page Six]
• Jane Krakowski is headed to Broadway to star in Damn Yankees. Whatever Lola wants, Lola gets. [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which show keeps its dim-witted if ultra-popular "reality" stars peppy with Adderall supplied by a producer in handfuls between scenes?" [Gatecrasher]
• Actor Thomas Jane pleaded not guilty to DUI charges yesterday. He goes back to court in May, and The Punisher will find out how he's being punished. [TMZ]
• 50 Cent is in talks to star in an upcoming indie film, but he has 21 questions first. [Perez Hilton]
• Gwyneth Paltrow says the rumors about her marriage breaking up are "ridiculous." She also reveals the astrological personalities of her kids: "Apple is an open person. She's Taurus; grounded, calm, funny. Moses is Aries, he's the most sweet, sensitive thing but then he'll kick and karate-chop and spit and tumble. He's a real boy." [People]
• Toni Braxton has canceled upcoming shows after being hospitalized for chest pains earlier in the week. She has previously been treated for hypertension and pericarditis. Be well! [People]
• A judge has dropped Michael Jackson from a lawsuit filed by the family of a women who died at a hospital after she was moved to make room for the pop star. [Yahoo News]
• Snoop Dogg has settled a lawsuit with his former record label, "though they won't disclose how many bones it took." Heh. [Yahoo News]
• Robert De Niro has left CAA, the agency he has been with for years. [Deadline Hollywood]
• Paris Hilton's brother Barron pleaded guilty to two misdemeanors from his DUI charges and will lose his license for a year. He also has to attend alcohol-education programs. [Yahoo News]
• Bob Marley's mother, Cedella Booker, died in her sleep Tuesday night at her home in Miami. She was 81. [USA Today]
• Never before seen Elvis pictures from 1972 have suddenly surfaced. Thank you, thank you very much. [Yahoo News]