• Heidi Klum is not Superwoman, okay? She's not walking in the Victoria's Secret runway show a mere month after giving birth to her fourth child. She's just going to host it. Sheesh. Some people have such unrealistic expectations. [E!]

• Meanwhile, this year's angels have been named: Candice Swanepoel, Chanel Iman, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Emanuela de Paula, and Lindsay Ellingson have all been welcomed into the fold. [SB]
• In other important lingerie news, some people who sell bras in London say that 1950s-style pointy bras are gaining popularity. However, none of the equipment pictured looks that pointy. [Daily Mail]
• Tom Ford says he struggled with depression after leaving Gucci, in 2004. "I started to sink emotionally, spiritually. I became a little bit lost. Leaving Gucci, it intensified because I had been able to cling to my job and to my work and to my identity as a successful fashion designer, and all of a sudden that was gone. It forced me to really think, Well, what am I, who am I, what am I about? It took me a bit of time to figure that out. I think this happens to most people in their life if they're insightful enough to indulge it and to get through to the other side." [W]
• This week's episode of Project Runway was shot partly at the Getty Center, and the challenge for the contestants is to create outfits that somehow reflect the museum and its architecture. There's a free screening at 7 tonight at the museum. [LATimes]
• Lady Gaga is now backtracking from her earlier claims, to Flare magazine, in which she said she would do a clothing line "at some point." The singer told the Accessories Council awards gala that she and her styling team aren't into that: "We will never do a line; we are not an economy." Then Toms founder Blake Mycoskie reminded the audience, gathered to celebrate, in Diane Von Furstenberg's words "friends you can carry with you and they make you feel better," that "Shoes, for 40 percent of the world, are not an accessory. They're a necessity." [Style.com]
• 50 Cent's torso appears in all its smoothly airbrushed glory for his new fragrance campaign, which he revealed to People. [People]
• Stephanie Winston-Wolkoff, who, until this July, worked at Vogue and essentially ran the annual Met Costume Institute Gala, has just been confirmed as the new director of fashion week at Lincoln Center. [FWD]
• There's news about Isaac Mizrahi's QVC collection, which goes on sale December 4, but we know what we all really are curious about is the cheesecake that will be sold. It's made by Junior's, the top looks to be printed with tartan in edible inks, and the crust is chocolate-flavored cookies. It'll be $40. Also for sale will be an Isaac Mizrahi banana nut loaf and chocolate-chip cookies. Yum. [WWD]
• Sociology major and current Prada face Kendra Spears, on embarrassing moments: "Well, during a hurried interview backstage an investigatory journalist asked me what I liked to do when I was at home and I said, 'nothing too commotious.' Afterwards, I realized commotious isn't even a word." And on jobs she held, pre-modeling: "I worked part time as an assistant to the owner of a company called LiftPort which was (and may still be) in the forefront of technologies, mostly carbon nanotubes, to build an elevator into space." [W]
• Because of the weak economy, more parents are trying to get agency representation for modeling and talent work for their children. Also because of the weak economy, there are fewer jobs to go around, and those jobs are still offered are less well-paying. [WSJ]
• Rumor has it that John Galliano is designing and decorating this year's Christmas tree for London's Claridge's hotel. [Style.com]
• Joanna Lumley and Jennifer Saunders of Absolutely Fabulous are in the Marks & Spencer holiday ads. [Mirror]
• Designer Adam Lippes, who staffs his office with around 20 interns at any one time, says of them: "[I]t's rare to find an intern — especially one from a fashion school — that has good style. Because they try sooo hard, and it never works! You know?" Having been once dressed by an Adam Lippes intern who was wearing a kind of 1980s Medusa costume, with a corset, we are tempted to agree, but for chrissakes, Lippes, they work for you for free. (Also: look who's talking.) [The Cut]
• Photographer Jean-Baptiste Mondino is against France's proposed retouching laws, which would require digitally altered images to bear labels stating that they have been, well, digitally altered. He tells Libération Next, "The photos of old Hollywood? Retouched! The iconic image of Che Guevara? Retouched! All the photos taken by Richard Avedon of Marilyn Monroe? Retouched! And all of this before today's software existed, of course. Legs were lengthened using a wide angle; skins were smoothed through overexposure." Because using a wide-angle lens is exactly the same as scissoring one head onto another body and placing the Frankenstein creation into a separately shot background and then liquifying the nose a little and changing the light source and strength and whittling down the waist. [WWD]
• Christian Siriano's holiday collection for Payless has turned up online. Are these even supposed to bear any resemblance to what he shows with his runway collection anymore? [Payless]
• Jodi Arnold, starting with her resort collection, is changing the name of her line from MINT Jodi Arnold, to Jodi Arnold NYC. The designer, who has a new job working on a collaboration with The Limited, also just opened her first store, a pop-up in Greenwich village. [WWD]
• The son of the founder of Escada is one of the bidders — in a consortium with the former head of Gucci and the department store owners Borletti Group — for the bankrupt German house. They are offering $118.2 million. [Reuters]
• Steve Madden is not only not bankrupt, it's feeling pretty acquisitory. C.E.O. Edward Rosenfeld says the company is on the lookout for brands worth $30-$40 million, but could splurge on something worth up to $100 million. [TS]
• Valentino head Stefano Sassi, says everything at the house is just great!!! Nothing to see here!!! Doth the C.E.O. protest too much? [Reuters]
• Liz Claiborne's third quarter losses were even bigger than expected. This is the company's eighth consecutive quarter of losing money. [WSJ]

• Victoria Beckham is out at Armani, and Megan Fox is in. The actress has just been photographed by Mert Alas and Marcus Piggott for next January's Emporio Armani underwear and Armani Jeans campaigns. [WWD]

• Amber Valletta has a clothing line, and Saks Fifth Avenue will donate $250,000 to breast cancer research from goods it sells from this Thursday through Sunday, whether you shop there or not. [USAToday]
• Betsey Johnson — who has talked openly of wanting a diffusion line, perhaps with Target or H&M, in the past — might get her wish. She told the National Arts Club last night that she was in talks to do a line with QVC or HSN. [The Cut]
• Women's Wear Daily tries cheekily to make the point, through historic quotes and photos, that Emanuel Ungaro, the couturier, and Lindsay Lohan, the fake tan executive who now runs his label, share an aesthetic. But, seriously, he's the guy who said "Shock for its own sake doesn't interest me," and, "A maison de couture is not a circus." [WWD]
• Former Calvin Klein underwear model and Guess? campaign star Jason Lewis — also known as that hot guy Samantha starts banging on Sex And The City — is now shilling for something called Charisma Linens. [NYDN]
• Tory Burch is getting into microfinance for women entrepreneurs — domestic microfinance for women entrepreneurs. [TDB]
• A New York University-affiliated group has ranked Louis Vuitton, Ralph Lauren, and Clinique as the top three luxury fashion brands, by "digital IQ." Strange that a company with so much apparent investment in its e-commerce division could show such an utter lack of understanding of the online media; Ralph Lauren's Filippa Hamilton Photoshop debacle, with its manifold examples of the company's digital stupidity, could be hurting the brand for years to come. [WWD]
• M.I.A. wore a $10 suit from Goodwill to meet Anna Wintour. [Twitter]
• Someone get 19-year-old French model Constance Jablonski a beer: she walked in 72 fashion shows in four cities in less than a month. [Models.com]
• Joe Corre, the famous loose cannon behind the Agent Provocateur label, has quit the brand abruptly. He will maintain his ownership share of the company, but no longer work for it. Instead, he'll concentrate on his men's wear line, called Child of the Jago. [WWD]
• Jennifer Connelly isn't returning as the face of Balenciaga. The brand's spring campaign is understood to feature Kasia Struss, and three other models. [Fashionista]
• Lacoste has collaborated with Brazilian industrial designers Fernando and Humberto Campana, and the results include a $7,000 polo shirt made entirely of the label's alligator appliqués, hand-sewn together in a lacey pattern. [WWD]
• Tommy Bahama is doing a line of shirts for Major League Baseball. The first one is for the next World Series. [Crain's]
• Patrick Robinson showed this season's Gap collection in Tokyo, after showing previous seasons in London and New York, to show that "We're all so super-connected. A lot of our stores are in big urban cities, and all of my friends now are all around the world." The designer continued, "But they're texting me and e-mailing me, and we're all connected. But we're also all trying to get back to nature. We're all starting to care about what we drink, and the food we eat, and where that food comes from. There's something about us that's longing to be back in nature. Those two things are sort of at odds with one another, and what I like about this collection is it sort of brings them together." Whatever. The guy makes incredible pants. [WWD]
• Marc Jacobs is bringing back its popular nude celebrity "Protect The Skin You're In" skin cancer awareness t-shirts. They cost $35, and all the proceeds go to the NYU Cancer Institute. [Hypebeast]
• L.L. Bean is trying to update its image with a new collection, designed by Rogues Gallery's Alex Carleton. [WWD]
• Some snooty society magazine editor named Rachel Johnson — Oxford-educated sister of London mayor Boris — decided it was proper to make fun of Twiggy's accent in her editor's letter. "I bumped into Twiggy at a Burberry event at London Fashion Week. I thanked her for being our cover girl. She went a bit blank but when I mentioned this publication her Bambi-eyes lit up and she said, 'Oi love The Lie-dee,' which made me feel very happy." [Daily Express]
• Abercrombie is planning on lowering its prices slowly and strategically, in the hopes of luring customers back without hurting its brand image. [NYPost]
• Burberry's sales in the most recent quarter rose 5%, to $545 million, ahead of analysts' forecasts. Same-store sales also rose 5%. [WSJ]

• Move over, David Beckham: Cristiano Ronaldo is posing in the spring Armani underwear campaign. [AP]
• Beckham, who says he decided not to renew his Armani contract, is said to be looking to launch an underwear line of his own. [WWD]

• A fit model who worked at Guess? for three years is suing the company for sexual harassment. She alleges that founder Paul Marciano made unwanted sexual advances, and cut her work hours after she resisted. [WWD]
• Yohji Yamamoto announced this morning it was filing for bankruptcy. [NYTimes]
• Meanwhile, Giorgio Armani launched a cell phone that costs $1,032. [Reuters]
• Grace Coddington's face on a t-shirt is definitely something we want. [Refinery29]
• Model Agyness Deyn abstained from booze at a party for a movie. Allegedly, it's because her boyfriend, Albert Hammond, Jr., of the Strokes, is in rehab. [P6]
• Naomi Campbell picked a bag from the Louis Vuitton spring collection to sell to benefit the White Ribbon Appeal, which works to reduce deaths in childbirth. The bag will cost 1,900 Euros; no word yet on what percentage of the proceeds will go to the charity. [Elle UK]
• Looking so nervous you'd have sworn she was about to have a heart attack, Katy Perry interviewed Karl Lagerfeld after his show in Paris. After asking him about the prevalence of metal trim in the collection, the Kaiser said it was actually metallicized leather. The look on the pop star's face when Lagerfeld tells her the one song that sums him up is Lily Allen's "It's Not Me, It's You," is priceless. Then the designer says, "I'm addressing what others do, or have done, but have never wanted to be somebody else." And Perry asks to borrow one of the "metal" dresses for the EMAs. [People]
• Mario Sorrenti is shooting Nicole Kidman in the next Omega watch campaign. "I love diamonds," says the star. [WWD]
• Project Runway is to become a Wii game. We hope that there will be secret levels you can pass into, where the designers will all start singing, "Daniel Franco, Where Did You Go." Or maybe, if you unlock a special sewing box, you look through it and see Tim Gunn and Andrae eating at Red Lobster. [MSNBC]
• Chanel Iman and Iman: Iman and Chanel Iman. These two beautiful ladies did a video for Modelinia, wherein they talked about diversity in fashion. "With the diversity on the runway, it's getting better. But we need more diversity in the campaigns," says Chanel. "The first couple of pages in the magazine is not, you know, ethnic girls." "It's amazing at this age, 2009, almost 2010, with Obama as President, that e should be even talking about this," adds Iman. Iman sums up her life advice thusly: "Just be true to yourself. And don't embarrass your parents. Please." [Modelinia]
• A Portuguese eBay user put a bag from the Jimmy Choo for H&M collection up for auction. The collection doesn't go on sale until November 14. The bag, allegedly from a photo shoot, didn't sell. [Racked]
• Dina Lohan told Access Hollywood not to believe everything you read about Lindsay's fancy new job in fashion, and how that's going. "She's just a little girl and God gave her this gift. She's just trying to create. She did great in Paris, don't believe what you read. She's genius at fashion." Meanwhile, she would like us to buy something called "Shoe-Hans." She herself will continue wearing footwear by Yves Saint Laurent and Gucci, thank you very much. [The Cut]
• Rachel Roy says moving to the East Coast for university after growing up in the Bay Area was a shock, because the former could be "quite segregated, and I wasn't into that. I'm only 35 — so it's not like we're talking many years ago — but I wasn't used to it because I grew up around Samoans, African-Americans, and Filipinos. You go to a club based on the music you like, not based on the kind of people you want to be around. I kind of went into a culture shock when I moved to the East Coast. I try to bring back that laid-back, hippie-chic attitude that the Bay Area has to my business because I've interned at so many places in fashion where it can be quite anal. But I also love New York. I love that it's the closest city we have to Europe, so that's a part of me, but thank God I'm from an area that keeps me out of it." [FabSugar]
• Yesterday in Japan, a suit went on sale that claims to offer some protection against swine flu to its wearer. The $580 suit is coated with titanium dioxide, a chemical that can break down viruses that come into contact with it. To put it mildly: this seems unlikely to work. Why not get the swine flu vaccine instead? [Telegraph]
• Nars is celebrating its 15th year in business with a book featuring photographs of fashion celebrities like Daphne Guinness and Marc Jacobs wearing its products. François Nars did both the makeup and the photography. [WWD]
• Kate Moss met her longtime hairdresser, James Brown, when she was 14. She went to a party at his house, and his sister threw her out. "She thought her boyfriend was flirting with me," explains the supermodel. "So that was that, really," adds Brown. "It started with a fight." Also relevant to this video: HOLY ACCENTS. [Elle UK]
• James Mischka and Mark Badgley live in a 546 sq. ft. studio apartment in Midtown. How relatable! Which they moved into because they were spending too much time in their weekend home, a Lexington, Kentucky, horse farm, to justify the expense of a Greenwich Village duplex. Sigh. [WSJ]
• Philip Treacy designed footwear for the first time ever for the Valentino show. The renowned milliner says working for the foot was like "a whole other dimension." [Elle]
• Again, the article about Crocs, what they mean, whether or not they can make it as a going concern, and what that means. [Time]
• Lost in the news of Liz Claiborne's reshuffle yesterday — the Liz Claiborne line will be sold exclusively at J.C. Penney's, and Isaac Mizrahi's Liz Claiborne New York line will go to QVC — was the fate of Claiborne by John Bartlett, the men's wear line. It will cease to exist. Sorry, guys. [Racked]
• Uniqlo's parent company posted a record profit for the year, of $1.2 billion. [AdAge]
• Levi's profits fell 41% in the third quarter. [WSJ]

• Gwyneth Paltrow has tired of the cosmetics contract gravy train; no longer shall the actress concentrate on embodying the qualities of the Estée Lauder brand. Instead, she'll be the new, white Oprah! [Daily Mail]

• Nanette Lepore has added her voice to the save the garment center chorus. [HuffPo]
• According to Jesus Luz's Brazilian agent, Sergio Mattos, Luz was paid $100 for the two-day Steven Klein shoot with Madonna that ended up in W. Let me say this one more time: that kind of pay is entirely standard for an editorial shoot, no matter one's modeling experience or industry status. [NY Post]
• Christina Aguilera looks, um, Photoshopped to high hell in the new Stephen Webster jewelry campaign. [Sun]
• Jerry Hall got a $750,000 advance from HarperCollins to write a memoir that would include full details on her life with Mick Jagger. But the manuscript Hall rendered proved too tame and cagey on the subject of Jagger for the publisher's taste; the supermodel has agreed to return the advance. (Side note: how many times do you get to read a word like "priapic" in the Daily Mail?) [Daily Mail]
• Terry Richardson just shot next year's Pirelli calendar in Trancoso, Bahia, Brazil. Georgina Stojiljkovic, Catherine McNeil, Abbey Lee Kershaw, and Daisy Lowe are purported to be featured, along with actual Brazilians Gracie Carvalho and Ana Beatriz Barros. Glamurama got a NSFW snap of Richardson in action, shooting a topless McNeil on a white horse. [Glamurama via Fashionologie]
• Supposedly, Zac Posen is in the early stages of producing a scripted series for the CW network about the equestrian world. Might be a wise move to diversify, as we keep hearing wild rumors that his label is in trouble. [The Cut]
• Erin Fetherston is also shooting a short film this week, starring Juliette Lewis, and her fall collection. Music is by Damon Dash. Her husband also confirmed that the designer will launch a line for home-shopping giant QVC this fall, probably during fashion week. [WWD]
• Stacey Bendet Eisner — yes, last year she married the son of that Eisner — is the designer behind Alice + Olivia. And she says there are exciting things to come for the brand, including an expanded line of embellished t-shirts, a jewelry line with Erickson Beamon coming out this November, and a possible cosmetics deal. [Blackbook]
• Macy's says not to expect deep markdowns this season — but it does want a lower-priced outlet store bearing its name, since Saks and Nordstrom both have them. [WWD]
• Douglas Reker, one of the bracingly new designers I'm personally most excited about, has just been picked up for fall by Barneys Coop. [Crain's]
• Now that Lakshmi Menon — two-time Indian Vogue covergirl — has had her only-girl editorial debut in American Vogue, industry commentators wonder aloud: Why has it taken so long for a South Asian supermodel to emerge? Sarah Doukas of London mega-agency Storm says it's because Indians are culturally conservative and don't want their daughters modeling; Menon says agencies don't have scouting networks on the subcontinent, and if you don't look for something, of course you won't find it. [Independent]
• England's National Trust is in talks to buy the home of the late designer Laura Ashley. [Telegraph]
• Leigh Lezark, who is a member of this preposterous thing called the MisShapes, but who nonetheless finds time in her busy schedule to "model", might be Matthew Williamson's new muse. Because a perpetually black-clad stony-stared New Yorker would be the perfect match for his exuberant tastes. [Fashionista]
• Rosa Chá, which is just about the best-looking and best-fitting swimwear out there, barring perhaps Norma Kamali, and therefore heartbreaking for its extravagant price, is losing its founding designer, Amir Slama. Slama, who launched Rosa Chá over two decades ago, is going to start a namesake swim collection. Brazilian Alexandre Herchcovitz will take over at Rosa Chá. [WWD]
• Diego Della Valle, the head of Italian leather goods brand Tod's, has doubled his investment stake in Saks Fifth Avenue, to 5.9%. [WWD]
• Alberta Ferretti, Moschino, and Pollini are all lowering their prices. Their parent company, Italy's Aeffe SpA, experienced steep losses in the first quarter of this year, and has thus formulated a cost-cutting plan that is intended to save $13.6 million over the course of 2010. In addition to lowering prices, Aeffe is shrinking its collections and planning layoffs. [WWD]

Like a lot of celebrity-designed lines on QVC, Elisabeth's line is affordable, with price points ranging from about $40 - $80. "Affordable" doesn't have to mean "cheap," but in this instance, it does. And I swear on my superficially-aborted fetuses that my opinion on this is in no way swayed by Elisabeth's opinions on anything, although admittedly, it's equally perfunctory.

Anyway, this is Elisabeth's modernized version of a nautical jacket ($59), and two different ways to wear it. She also designed both pairs of pants ($44, $49).

There are lots of animal prints in this line—like this cardigan ($59)—and three-quarter length tops and capri pants, because when she was designing the line, Elisabeth thought of something that Joy often says: "The wrists and ankles are the last to go."

Elisabeth calls this shirt ($39.94), "A little T-shirt with alotta flirt." Of the design, she said, "I thought, 'Heck, let's give it a try.'"

This pinstripe shirt ($48)—perfect for a Concerned Women for America meeting—has a metallic flair.

"I took animal to the next level," Elisabeth said of this sheer blouse ($54.54). She told Joy that "it'll let you survive any hot flash." Seriously, the jokes are writing themselves here.

She called this top ($39.84) the "anchor piece of the collection." Maybe it makes you look heavy, no matter your body type.

Sherri totally wants out of there.

• Sienna Miller is going to be the face of a new Hugo Boss fragrance. When was the last time you remember Sienna Miller actually acting? [WWD]

• In further crossover tales, newly minted TV host Coco Rocha, who's jumping between walking in shows and filming them for an E! Canada documentary this week, says she's glad she doesn't have to talk to celebrities because, unlike industry people, they don't know who she is. Also, she thinks her red hair makes people treat her differently. "I think people are more scared of me. They think I'm evil." [The Cut]
• The Costume Institute's spring exhibit will be all about the model as a fashion muse and the evolution of beauty standards for women. [Guardian]
• Event co-host Kate Moss's muse status has already translated to the art world: a set of Banksy portraits of the model, done in the style of Andy Warhol's iconic Marilyn Monroe silkscreens, are going to be auctioned in London. [Telegraph]
• Speaking of model muses, Japanese model Tao Okamoto's haircut inspired Philip Lim's runway hairstyle. She shot his look book and he was taken with her. [Elle]
• Meanwhile, Michelle Obama inspired the hair and makeup look at Baby Phat. [WWD]
• If you're taking any New York taxis this week, the video screen of asinine weather and real estate information ("Buy A West Village Condo For Eleventy Million Dollars! Someone From Corcoran Explains Why!") you immediately poke at furiously to turn off may contain images of Cynthia Rowley's fall collection. [WWD]
• Male model Cole Mohr shot a fashion week video for New York. He goes backstage and tells fellow model Tyler Riggs, "Say something meaningful! We're on film!" Riggs pulls a face and replies, "It's better to destroy than create what is meaningless." Then he thinks a second, lights a match, and says, "I am why the ozone layer is fucked up." And this is why I cannot hang out with male models. [The Cut]
• The New York Times has been to the tents and sees only Doom and Gloom (with sides of Sturm and Drang). Representative line about a drag queen: "Having spent two decades capitalizing on the froth thrown off by both boom and bust economies, he was also well acquainted with the uses of sobriety." And Twitters about Marc Jacobs' hair get at something existential. [NY Times]
• PPR, the megaconglomerate whose luxury holdings include Yves Saint Laurent, Gucci, and Bottega Veneta, saw flat revenue in the fourth quarter of 2008. But luxury sales for this year have grown by 8.1% on last January. Emerging markets like China saw Gucci sales increase 42% in 2008. [Financial Times]
• Also weathering the downturn passably is Uniqlo chairman and CEO Tadashi Yanai, whom Forbes just named Japan's richest man. $6.1 billion is a lot of $30 cashmere sweaters. [WWD]
• The Italian apparel sector has formally requested aid from the government. Auto makers and homewares manufacturers were included in a stimulus package approved last month, but not fashion or textile companies. One large company, IT Holdings SpA, has already seen its luxury division (owner of the brands Gianfranco Ferre and Malo, as well as licenses for Cavalli Sport) teeter into bankruptcy. [Reuters]
• Dress Barn projects a second quarter loss. [WWD]
• PETA supporter Tim Gunn says designers "Hhve a responsibility to know about [ethical issues surrounding fur]. If you're going to use fur, you at least need to know which sources are less abusive than others...I would never use anything from China. What people don't tell you is that it's most likely dog. And they call it something else and they make it look like something else." Fur cannot be used in the Project Runway final collections, interestingly. [Reuters]
• Even Anne Slowey's dog is fasting this fashion week. [Elle]
• However, this story about how Slowey missed the first few days of shows because her 85-year-old mother in Indiana needed help converting her analog TV for digital signal is very sweet. [Observer]
• UK Vogue features editor Harriet Quick says Posh's new dress collection is good. (It's hard to imagine how a set of Roland Mouret rip-offs could be bad, exactly...) As if to highlight her unoriginality, the story is illustrated with pictures of Posh's dress presentation side-by-side with pictures of Posh wearing similar outfits in years past. [Daily Mail]
• Luckily, she wasn't taking inspiration from Cartier: the French jeweler is suing QVC over the similarity of several watch designs in their Joan Rivers collection. [WWD]
• American Vogue's fashion news and features editor, Sally Singer, is a Berkeley- and Yale-educated former book editor who certainly reads more contemporary fiction than you do. She also skipped several grades, wrote a letter to Andy Warhol when she was 12 asking for a job at Interview, and has sewn her own clothes since she was in middle school, because her family's budget didn't stretch to the kinds of garments she saw in the fashion magazines she scoured growing up. She seems friendly, well-adjusted, and entirely non-sociopathic. It is a heartbreaking paradox of this industry that some of the smartest, funniest, and most culturally engaged women you could ever meet, somehow, once they get together, are responsible for creating the lobotomized morass that is the women's media. [Mediabistro]

• In an apparent attempt to rob the Costume Institute of gravitas, Sarah Jessica Parker will be doing the audio commentary for the Met's latest exhibit. The SATC tour bus frantically adds a stop. [ElleUK]
• Says the curator, “Walking through the galleries listening to Sarah Jessica Parker’s narration will bring a sense of discovery and delight to the experience.” [WWD]
• Prince Charles is apparently inspiring British menswear! [FT]
• Having watched Stylista, we're sure Christy Turlington is eminently qualified to be a Marie Claire editor. [Fashionista]

• Robert Verdi on Michelle Obama's Narciso Rodriguez: "She looked like a lava lamp and we all know that. I didn’t like that light bright dress and I think she could have made a better choice. I like that she wore an American designer, I think she should continue to wear American fashion and speak the style of the nation in her public appearances and then move towards an international flavor." [FabSugar]
• What does the savvy recessionista drive? Why, the Hermès smart car! "The Fortwo édition Toile cars, manufactured by the Como group, are available in 10 colors including gold, indigo and the luxury house’s signature orange. Each is fitted with Hermès leather-covered steering wheels and gear levers, with colors including fuchsia and lime, along with the brand’s original canvas toile." [WWD]
• How better to transport your Christopher Kane radio! [VogueUK]
• "On the surface, the similarities are striking; they were both princesses born in the 1940s in a foreign land. Young and beautiful, the long-haired brunettes soon fell in love and followed their men to the United States where they built a reputation for steely determination and strength." That would be Diane von Furstenberg and Wonder Woman. Obvs. [CNN]
• Lauren Bush — oh, sorry, Pierce — "has been hard at work on her capsule collection of environmentally sustainable clothes since early 2008." [W]
• The all-important vintage couture bubble has yet to pop! [Forbes]
• Apparently Yves Saint Laurent collected stuff from China's Opium Wars. Now it's being auctioned. For a lot of money. [NY Mag]
• Remind me to avoid this Uniqlo stunt: "On Nov. 18 at Military Island in Times Square, a team of Heat-Techies dressed in silver bodysuits will be scanning pedestrians with a thermograph that reveals the coldest parts of the body. The consumers can then walk over to a giant human vending machine that dispenses free products. Press of a button for men’s or women’s clothing sets in motion models inside the machine, who dance a choreographed routine and dispense a package of Heattech innerwear." [WWD]
• Uh oh. Cosmetics, normally recession-proof, are feeling some pain. [FT]
• The Casual Male group is benefiting from Europe's rising obesity rates. [IHT]
• Apparently both PR designers Laura Bennett and Chloe Dao (yes, who won!) will be selling their lines on QVC tonight. Which is good, right? Right? [Blogging Project Runway]
• Following the success (?) of Model.Live, Conde Nast has the video bug. [Fashionista]
• Laetitia Casta is the latest Vuitton muse. [Sassybella]

• Okay, it's slightly less random than it seems: Dempsey's wife, Jillian, has been Avon’s global creative color director since July 2006. Not that this really excuses it. Or why WWD refers to "Unscripted", ominously, as the actor's "first scent." And about that name: does he really want to take credit for ad-libbing the Grey's dialogue? [WWD]
• Meanwhile, in other fragrance news, Josh Hartnett is fronting "Emporio Armani: Diamonds for Men," [ET]
• ...while Eva Mendes is the, um, face of both Calvin Klein's new Secret Obsession perfume and its "Seductive Comfort" underwear line. Quoth the loyal pitchwoman, ""I wear [Calvin Klein] G-strings all of the time on the red carpet and when shooting for a film because you don't see the [panty] lines." [WWD]
• Christian Siriano: "I am honored to be a part of this amazing group of talent!” Siriano said. “It is a dream to work with legends such as [director] Charles Shyer, Uma Thurman and [costume designer] Milena Canonero on a wonderful story filled with creative inspirations." The project? Eloise in Paris. [E!]

• Meanwhile, fellow PR winner Jay McCarroll is shilling his wares on QVC. [Blogging Project Runway]
• I think we can all agree that there's no such thing as too many Karl Lagerfeld documentaries. [WWD]
• German Elle celebrated its big 2-0 in Berlin. Yes, Lagerfeld was there. [WWD]
• In one handy reference: the Ethical Fashion Directory. [The Guardian]
• Bravissimo offers "full-figured" nightwear; PJs that actually support. 'Rather than the 'one size fits all' approach, Bravissimo's designs are based on a standard sized back, shoulders and waist but, within each dress size, offer different sizes to account for the fullness of the bust.' [The Star]
• Model Lily Cole in French Playboy, which is allegedly more 'artistic' than the Yank version. Hm. [Fashionista]
• Long-awaited Prada flagship opens in San Francisco. [WWD]
• CondeNast'sFashion Rocks, the worst fashion and music magazine in the history of the universe, will come out in September, and the accompanying concert features Rihanna, Beyoncé, Justin Timberlake, Fergie, Mariah Carey, Keith Urban, Kid Rock and Lil Wayne. It'll air on CBS. [E!]
• Yup, the death watch is on for Mervyn's, all right. We feel bad for the chain's founder. [Los Angeles Times]
• That Visa London clothing swap LiLo fronted? Listen to this undemocratic twist: "Participants dropped off unwanted items at collection points over the last six weeks, receiving points on a swipe card. The more exclusive the outfit, the more points they received, which they could spend yesterday on other donated items." Wait, who determined "exclusivity"? [The Observer]
• Russian public schools ban "emo and goth" clothing. [Fashionista]
• "But fashion is also theatre, a world of make believe, and there is nothing more theatrical than revealing the layers of artifice that construct an image, especially when it is done within the image itself. It is like the conjurer's reveal." The intricate dance that is Fashion Photography. [The Guardian]
• Alexander Calder's jewelry, which he mostly made for family and friends, is on display at the Philly Art Museum. And it's amazing. '"He's not a jeweler,"a curator said. "There are no welds. He's working on an anvil and a bench, but he's not doing what jewelers do, not making links or soldering things. He's taking wire and doing stuff with it that no one else was doing. With basic wire."' [NPR]
• New York's Clock Tower Building, a century-old Madison Avenue landmark, is getting a makeover. By Versace. The quietly tasteful fashion house is decorating 55 apartments and a spa. presumably gold, cheetah, tanning beds will figure prominently. [Reuters]
• Betsy Johnson is awesome, has a "man-lover." [WWD]
• Parishoners at St. James United Church of Christ have modified 150 pairs of boxer shorts for wounded veterans, replacing the shorts' side seams with fasteners so they are easier to fit over bulky prosthetics and braces. Good work and probably something that people don't often consider. But the fact that they're bringing the undies to the altar to be blessed on Sunday is just peculiar. [USA Today]
• "Jacques Kaplan, 83, Bold Furrier, Dies." [IHT]
• Designers Kate&Kass name their designs after famous women. They have an Ingrid Newkirk. Also a Benazir Bhutto minidress. [Fabsugar]
• In spite of economic challenges, textile fairs thrive. [WWD]
• Seattle Jezzies: donate gently used prom duds for low-income teens. [,a href="http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/lifestyle/371628_tf222.html?source=rss">Seattlepi]
• Bravo's Runway replacement? UK import Fashion House , which "replicates the workings of the fashion business through a fashion house." Teams of designers will live together and work to create an entire line — rather than just individual pieces — that has the potential to be purchased by commercial buyers.' We want to believe! [New York Magazine]
• British denim brand Lee Copper celebrated its centennial with various one-off collabs: "From the gothic-inspired denim dress complete with Swarovski crucifix designed by Giles, to the vintage denim jacket emblazoned with signature gold lips by Jade Jagger, each and every piece is set to shoot straight to the top of every fashion fan's wishlist." Well, let's not get carried away, here. [ElleUK]

I was actually pretty surprised I won. I wanted it so badly, but I needed it more than I wanted it. I'm just getting started....I'm not looking to make hundreds of thousands of dollars. I want to brand myself as well, but I want my clothes to be high fashion, avant-garde. It's easier to take inspiration from something that's creative than to build on something that's not. I don't want to do QVC.

Fortunately for Siriano, he — unlike Project Runway alums Chloe Dao, Jay McCarroll, Emmett McCarthy, and Laura Bennett — won't have to: Barneys New York, Jeffrey's, and Saks Fifth Avenue have all already bought pieces of his. So, yeah — one week after winning and Siriano, on talent and personality alone, is already the most successful person to have come out of the Bravo show. Other reasons to love Christian? He cares about his friends. "The only episode that bothered me was the first part of the finale. They showed all of the other designers with their friends and family, but not me. I had a bunch of friends over, and they cut it out of the episode. I'm not alone out here," says the clearly sensitive soul. Also, he's still friends with model Lisa Nargi. Says Lisa, "He's someone I'm always texting or sending messages to on MySpace. When things calm down for him, we'll definitely see a lot of each other....His clothes are going to be up there with the top designers. They're going to be the clothes that everyone wants to have. He'll be a designer like [John Galliano]."

And how is his life different post-Runway? "I can hardly go out anymore," he says. "Everyone wants to touch me or carry me, which gets really annoying after the first few times. You'd think I was naked the way people look at me....But I get paid to do parties now." Oh and does he say "fierce" anymore? Of course not: His phrase du jour is now "I'm gonna stab you."

Rubbing Elbows, Making Art [The Advocate]

• Please, baby Jesus, all we want for Christmas is for the rumors that Victoria Beckham will be the guest judge on the season finale of Project Runway to be true! [Rush & Molloy]
  
• The Dynamite Hosts are a gang of chiseled male models the fashion set has been booking like crazy to saunter around half-naked at their parties. Even Miuccia Prada has hired them. Yay, every baby step towards the day objectification of men reaches parity with objectification of women! Or um... [Vogue UK]
  
• Van Cleef & Arpels is suing Heidi Klum for ripping off their four-leaf clover jewelry designs for the jewelry line she sells on QVC, as if anyone who wears a Van Cleef clover even stands the chance of crossing paths with the wearer of a QVC clover, and also as if the four-leaf clover is some crazily innovative design element to employ. [Sassybella]

• Model Gemma Ward's feature film debut in The Black Balloon to premiere at the Berlin Film Festival in February. Apparently she's good. But is she good enough to warrant the 96 other stories we have read about "OMG a model manages to not suck in a movie" prior to this one? Nein. [Sassybella]
• "Retail visionary" and Kuwaiti royal Sheikh Majed Al-Sabah guest-blogs on the new New York Times blog "The Moment" about how no luxury brand would take him seriously when he was first starting out because apparently they were under the impression Kuwait was still the kind of place you had to get around on camel but then they realized the United States is the kind of place you have to get around on foreign oil and that oil was not getting cheaper so they needed to sell more merchandise and he seemed to have the money for it. It's a really inspiring story on so many levels. [NYTimes]
• Designer Shelley Steffe says her new handbag collection is "evolved from a garment." She better be careful dropping the e-word or her bags will surely soon be banned south of the Mason-Dixon line. [The Fashion Informer]
• Accessories designer Jesse Randall: Loves shopping at Target! (Us too!) Accessories designer Jesse Randall: Has a diffusion line coming out at Target next week. (Not us too.) Coincidence? Hmmm. [GlamChic]
• Just in case you were tempted, dousing yourself in glitter for the holidays is not a flattering look. [LATimes]

Infomercial For Mouth Gadget That's Supposed To Eliminate Wrinkles [BoingBoing]

But then the voice of corporate America speaks, via Senior VP of Home Shopping Network, Andy Sheldon.

"If a host starts putting on weight, then I will absolutely say something to them."

And with that, the hopes and dreams of middle-aged, amply-padded suburban moms and dads are smashed. Their love for cubic zirconia just isn't going to cut it: They, like everyone else in this image-obsessed economy, are going to have to starve themselves to get ahead, too!

The Biggest Sell Is the Audition [NYT]