• Frances Bean Cobain has written an open letter to Ali Lohan. Would you like to know what it says? Here goes — and consider it to be [sic]-filled:

"This is my open letter to Ali Lohan.
Your not entitled to anything simply because your sister has a recognizable name. Your idea of fame isn't fame. It's infamy. You want to be famous? Work your ass off and make decisions that could potentially catapult your career into a lasting one. Notariety for who you are and notaritey for the work you produce are two completely differnt things. I understand that you have been brought up in an envirtoment where the idea of fame is easily achievable but, that's not an excuse. You lack the talent, social understanding and credibility to be anything other then infamous. Your careere choices, thus far, will transcend a future career as someone who attempted to be famous, but never quite achieved it. And if you do, it will be the formality of fame that puts you on the covers of tabloids, while the public idly watches you plumit into the murky abyss shared with the likes of Spencer Pratt & Jon Gosslin who, i'm sure, will steal your money whilst there. Fortunately for the world, there are people who have and don't have recognizable names, who have obtained artistic integrity and will one day, hopefully, bring that tangible artisticness into light again. Though, its hard to think thats achievable when people like You ali lohan are rendering the world of true talent by attempting to make your entitled ass noticed. How is this fair to the people who HAVE artistic integrity, or a mind? How is it fair to those who truly have something to offer the human race other then a dwindling last name and a few shitty films, both of which, solidified the idea that your just a celebrities sibling. I recognize that i might come across as harsh and no, i don't personally know you, but its the actions that you take, that speak for you. You blatently don't care how your recognized, its the objective to get famous and that is what makes you replaceable and a recycled idea .Well, im ashamed to have to be grouped into the same category of person as you. I would rather die a most painful death the be assoicated with the kind of careere your trying to make for your self. I hope i'm wrong because generally i'm not a very judgmental person, but in the case of you, that is MY entitlement." Phew! …And scene. [ONTD]

• Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston had a "secret meeting" in New York, yet somehow the Daily Fail knows that the rendez-vous took place in a hotel and that Brad "unloaded his emotional baggage" on Jen. [Daily Mail]
• I wish I'd seen the Madonna and Lady Gaga dance off on Saturday night after SNL; sources say Madonna seemed to be the winner. [Page Six]
• "Madonna and her toy boy Jesus Luz had a bust-up following the pop queen's admission she'd rather get hit by a train than get hitched again." He supposedly feels like a fool and is heartbroken. [The Sun]
• OMG Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart went out for dinner (with friends)! They ate and enjoyed themselves! They were acting like a couple! All together, now: TWILIGHTISREALSPARKLEVAMP4EVA. [People]
• After being in a car accident on Monday, Nicole Richie's been checked out at the hospital, visited by her mother at home, and hired a lawyer. Hope everything is okay. [People]
• Jon Gosselin on that missing $230,000 from the Gosselin's joint account: "I never took any money." [TMZ]
• Lamar Odom has met with his lawyer regarding a prenup in his wedding to Khloe Kardashian, and word is, he will not be giving her half his earnings. [TMZ]
• Spoilers! You know this pic of Kim Cattrall in a wedding dress for Sex And The City 2: Electric Boogaloo? It's supposedly a fake-out; the ones getting married are Stanford and Anthony. More spoilery details at the link. [JustJared]
• SHOCKER: Mariah Carey has been acting like a diva on her new tour. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Click for a pic of Kate Hudson in a wedding dress, modeling for a Bazaar photo shoot. [NY Post]
• Organizers "worked overtime" to keep feuding singers Lily Allen and Katy Perry away from each other at the Chanel show in Paris. [The Sun]
• Kevin Federline's former landlords want $110,661 in unpaid rent and damages — which include spit marks on the exterior paint, gutters full of cigarette butts and beer bottles, broken tiles, a broken dishwasher and dismantled smoke detectors. Popo wow. [TMZ]
• Tyra Banks doesn't drink anymore, and a "source" says, "I guess that's how she ended up dropping 30 pounds." Anonymous weight loss speculation FTW! [Page Six]
• Shannen Doherty is working on a reality show that will highlight her "lighter and funnier" side. [E!]
• Queen Latifah is concerned about the hip-hop scene: "Never in my career do I remember rap being so male-dominated. In videos, women are basically shown as the girl you shake the booty with. They're objectified. There are females out there who can rap, who listen to rap. Missy and Lil' Kim and the young up-and-coming ones need an opportunity to be heard. I think we're all masculine and feminine, and a society can't be right if you don't honor the feminine voice." [USA Today]
• Usher's divorce: Delayed. [NY Daily News]
• "The FBI investigated whether Anna Nicole Smith was part of a plot to kill her tycoon husband's son, whom she was battling for his late dad's fortune, but prosecutors ultimately decided there wasn't enough evidence to charge the Playboy Playmate who died in 2007 from a drug overdose, newly released files show." [AP, LA Times]
• A man who bid in the canceled Michael Jackson auction is pissed he didn't get the stuff he was willing to pay for. He's suing for $5,000,000. [TMZ]
• Honestly, I do not even get why story about Jude Law, Hamlet and someone being upstaged by a skull is "news." It sounds like much ado without nothing. [Telegraph]
• The number of viewers of The Jay Leno Show: In decline. [USA Today]
• Nick Lachey avoided Jessica Simpson while in Vegas and refused to be photographed with on and off girlfriend Vanessa Minnillo. [Page Six]
• No one wants to be on Tinsley Mortimer's reality show. [Page Six]
• "Mel's anti-Jew-spew DWI wiped off books." [NY Post]
• Is Cougar Town a virus? It's spreading. The show will air in territories across Europe, Africa and the Middle East. This is what we export, people. Cougars. Can I go back to bed now? [Variety]
• If you shop at the right consignment stores, you could find clothes worn by Padma Lakshmi, who's given up her pre-pregnancy ensembles for charity. [Page Six]
• Something happened to Tony Roberts during the Sunday matinee of the Broadway play The Royal Family. His daughter reports the actor had a minor seizure and is now "feeling great." [USA Today]
• At the link, you'll find Chris Daughtry's tips for a happy marriage. If you're interested. [People]
• Elvis Presley's grandson Ben Presley, 17, just inked a $5 million record deal but says: "The music will be nothing like Elvis, nothing like him at all." Good luck with that! [NY Post]
• Little Britain star Matt Lucas had tried to get his former husband Kevin McGee off coke, and even paid for rehab; McGee committed suicide earlier this week. [The Sun]
• "I wanted somebody who had a huge presence-charismatic, able to dominate a room [yet] who was very sensitive, whose emotions were right under the surface." — Spike Jonze, on casting James Gandolfini's voice in Where The Wild Things Are. [The Daily Beast]
• "I think the way kids create is so inspiring. They're drawing a picture? They love the picture they drew; they're not tortured about it. But I think that that's only one side of me. Right now, it's a good story because it makes a tie-in with the movie." — Spike Jonze, on getting labeled an overgrown child. [Daily Beast]
• "I have kissed a lot of rock stars in my time but seriously never so many as the last 24 hours." — Courtney Love. [Page Six]
• "Hanging around with Chris, he always has a video camera, and he's like, 'I'm gonna ask you some questions about hair.' I talked a lot, but that turned out to be, uh, funny, I guess… I had a perm and when guys have it straightened, they put the rollers in their head, you know, so you get that Super Fly look." — Ice-T, who is in Chris Rock's Good Hair and, yes, used to wear rollers. [NY Mag]
• "I'd never been averse to any kind of medication, but you get brainwashed. I started reading all these books and doing pregnancy yoga. By the end, you feel you have to go natural in order to be a real woman. I got myself a doula [birthing assistant] and a water tank and struggled on for 24 hours, and then I had an epidural. I can remember saying to the anaesthetist, 'Oh, I love you, thank you so much.' I don't know what I was thinking." — Emily Mortimer, who is expecting her second child in January. [Telegraph]
• "It was important for me to write that, to get it off my chest. And to discuss it with a therapist, and tell my parents — which I did, eventually, though it took me about 20 years. And hopefully it will be helpful to someone out there who has gone through a similar situation. [The incident] left me not knowing how to deal with certain things. Boys can put pressure on you, and I didn't do so well with saying no. I had a lot to figure out, and I did eventually, but it was tough. We have to do a better job of looking out for our young girls, because there are predators out there." — Queen Latifah, regarding a song on her new album, Persona, about when she was molested as a 5-year-old by a male babysitter. [USA Today]
• "I get offered movies on a regular basis, but most of them are terrible because most of the movies that are made are terrible. I don't think anybody saw Adventureland, but they marketed it as a big comedy, so I get sent these really shitty scripts that I think people assume that was like. So many scripts where people are having sex with each other. Every script starts off with sex… [With Zombieland…they were nervous to hire me because I'm not famous. There were other more famous people who were auditioning for it. I think the main reason I got into it was because Sony really likes Greg Mottola, who directed Adventureland, so he vouched for me, because he directed their biggest movie in the last several years, Superbad. — Jesse Eisenberg. [BlackBook]
• "Guns seem dumb. I felt bad holding guns because I don't know what influence it has on people watching movies. You can make the argument that it lets people take out their aggression so they don't do it in real life. You can also make the argument that it makes guns look fun and people are going take them out and play with them." — Jesse Eisenberg. [BlackBook]
• "I normally get recognized as either a guy from Spring Awakening, or there's this other guy that screams at me all the time, Hey Napoleon Dynamite! I don't go to nightclubs, I don't go to nice restaurants. There's no perk that can be had aside from getting a slice of pizza at interviews. But you could. People really could exploit it. I haven't been single for 7 years, but I know people who are maybe my level of attractiveness or less and they can have sex quite often… That's great, because then they'll tell me about it." — Jesse Eisenberg. [BlackBook]

• Erin Wasson is reviving her jewelry collection as a cheaper costume line. Let's hope in addition to ditching the $1000+ price point, Wasson also abandons her unfortunate habit of claiming jewelry designer Bliss Lau's pieces as her own. [Elle UK]

• Because she lurves Roger Federer, Anna Wintour and her longtime boyfriend, Shelby Bryan, went to see Federer's match at the U.S. Open. They left before Serena even took the court. [P6]
• Vivienne Westwood has chosen Pamela Anderson for her Gold Label campaign for the second season running. Westwood and husband Andreas Kronthaler also re-join Anderson in the whimsical set of images. [Daily Mail]
• Crazy enough to work: Threeasfour and Yoko Ono. Ono reportedly inspired the wacky design trio's spring collection, and also contributed her artwork for prints. [WWD]
• Rachel Zoe's QVC collection, which clocks in at a relatively modest $32.50-130 price range, is full of faux fur and snakeskin pieces. [Nitro:Licious]
• Tim Gunn on Project Runway guest judge Lindsay Lohan: "I was surprised and pleased by how extremely knowledgeable about fashion and articulate Lindsay Lohan was. She's very young and can be portrayed in ways that aren't all together flattering, and she was a true statesperson and really weighed in on the designers and what they were doing exceptionally well. And it was really a thrill to have her." [People]
• Although 19-year-old model Jourdan Dunn was included in the Women agency's Spring/Summer 2010 Show Package, which was thought to mean that the five months pregnant runway star would make the circuit of casting directors this season, Women has confirmed that Dunn will not be at fashion week. Guess we won't get to add Dunn to the list of models (Dunn's compatriots Karen Elson and Stella Tennant among them) who have also walked shows while pregnant. [The Cut]
• Yigal Azrouël, who has earned more press in recent months for his alleged role in the breakup of Billy Joel and Katie Lee's marriage than for his designs, is reportedly in the unique position of seeking less media attention. Although his show will still be attended by around 800 people, expect fewer celebrities, and no after-party. Also, nobody who ever slept with Eliot Spitzer is invited. [NYDN]
• Daphne Guinness, on what tuberose, the principal note in her new perfume, Daphne, reminds her of: "My mother and the flower market in Figueres in Spain and in Cadaqués, where I grew up. We always used to have these huge vats of them, and they would just fill the house with scent all summer long. It reminds me of my childhood. I would collect them and put them all on greaseproof paper with a kind of gel, and then you leave it for a few days. Then you'd scrape off the gel and have a sort of essence. It's quite an ancient plant. Don't quote me on this, but someone told me that pterodactyls used to eat them...it does make sense, because when they die they smell like rotting flesh, and that's why pterodactyls were attracted to them — actually maybe it was archaeopteryx. Tuberose, they're not beautiful in the peony sense of the word, but the smell is unlike anything else. I love it. And I love the scent of sort of all those woods that you get from the Middle East. I grew up in the seventies and everybody was running around burning Joss sticks and, you know, banging tambourines." [Style.com]
• Paper magazine is hosting a black-tie event at the New York Public Library — which is adjacent to Bryant Park — to kick off fashion week. Liza Minnelli and Queen Latifah, plus other "surprise" guests, will perform. [People]
• L'Oréal principal shareholder Liliane Bettencourt's legal fight with her daughter, Françoise Bettencourt-Meyers, has gone to court in France. Bettencourt, 86, has admitted turning over about $1 billion worth of her fortune to François-Marie Banier, a 62-year-old photographer who is her confidant. Bettencourt-Meyers accuses Banier of "exploitation of weakness," a criminal offense, while Bettencourt's side says that Bettencourt-Meyers is simply jealous and ungrateful. [ToL]
• Time's Style & Design issue will suspend publication after the current issue, which goes out today. Ad pages in the magazine had decreased precipitously. [WWD]
• Abakus jewelry designer Marsha Chun-Matsubara: "My parents say that when I was four, I wore a small, heavy bike chain around my neck. Later, when I really wanted my ears pierced I stuck Chiquita Banana stickers on my earlobes. When I was about seven, my mother was teaching me how to use an abacus. I was so frustrated that I threw it and all the beads scattered. From then on, I used the wooden beads to make necklaces. That's where I got the name for my line." [W]
• The sadly deceased DJ AM — a noted sneakerhead who owned more than 700 pairs of Nikes — was working on his own line for the shoe giant when he died last week. Although the final designs, Nike says, had Adam Goldstein's approval, whether and when they will ever be released now depends on the desires of the musician's family. [TMZ]
  
• Nancy Talbot, the woman behind the Talbot's retail chain, has died in Colorado. She was 89. [NYTimes]
• Donatella Versace tells Out magazine — the October cover of which she graces, with model Paul Sculfor — that "You can be too boring, but you can never be too seductive." Which is a point of view we were pretty much familiar with from looking at her clothes. [WWD]
• Vanessa Williams says Ugly Betty's wardrobe department is spending its money wisely — and sticking to sale items. "There was a Naeem Kahn dress that went for $3,000, and they watched it and watched and by the time we got it, it was like $800." [People]
• The premium denim market may have some life in it yet. At the apparel trade show in Las Vegas, pricey brands like True Religion and Citizens of Humanity reported strong wholesale sales, and the NPD Group says the premium denim market grew 5% in the 12 months ended in June. [Reuters]
• But during the month of August, across the whole apparel sector, same-store sales declined an average of 2.5%. Back-to-school sales and promotions did little to stoke the desire of unwilling consumers. [Crains]
• Quiksilver reported a 53% drop in third-quarter earnings on last year. [WSJ]
• Movado scraped through the quarter with a modest profit — $528,000 — after six months of losses. The result still represents a 93.5% fall in earnings on last year. [WWD]
• Meanwhile, Abercrombie & Fitch continues to live up to its reputation as the Worst Recession Company Ever. (Thanks Time!) After announcing its latest disastrous monthly comps — August same-store sales fell 29% — Citi downgraded the stock to a Sell, and share prices fell 6%. [TS]
• Choosing the 50 Sluttiest American Apparel ads is like shooting fish in a barrel. [StyleCrave]

• Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley: Headed for divorce? According to sources:

She's been "partying hard and hanging with a number of male admirers." The two, married in 2006, have not been photographed together since last December. [Gatecrasher]

• Chris Brown sat down with Larry King last night for a "no-holds-barred chat." Expect it to air sometime next week. Interesting that it wasn't not live — no one could call in or Tweet and tell Chris how they really feel about him. [E!]
• Meanwhile Rihanna went dancing with Serena Williams, Queen Latifah and Paula Patton. [Gatecrasher]
• At her concert in Bucharest, Madonna spoke out against the discrimination of Gypsies. She said it made her "sad" that the Roma peple were discriminated against. The crowd booed. [AP]
• These blurry pix are the "three slick hipsters" who allegedly ransacked Lindsay Lohan's house. [NY Daily News]
• WTF: Some fans were escorted from their seats by security for "dancing too provocatively" at the Britney Spears concert in NYC on Tuesday. This is the same woman who shimmied half-naked with a snake while moaning "I'm a slave for you," right? [Page Six]
• Jon Gosselin's reaction to Kate Gosselin's interview with Larry King: "She didn't say anything. She just kept on redirecting and avoiding answering the questions." Jon adds: "When Larry's ready for me, I can answer questions." [MSNBC]
• Cops have located Jasmine Fiore's Mercedes, missing since her murder. Ryan Jenkins was seen leaving a hotel near San Diego on August 14 in the car — carrying a suitcase — it was the same suitcase that was later found to contain Fiore's body. [TMZ]
• Uh-oh: Gerard Butler's pug, Lolita, got into an "altercation" with a greyhound. The greyhound allegedly bit Gerard's dog twice — but the greyhound's owner says that Gerard's dog wasn't on a leash and that Gerard hit his greyhound on the head and shouted, "That dog should be put down!" [MSNBC Scoop]
• Ashley Olsen wore corduroy trousers and a turban to a Girl Talk concert in Brooklyn on Saturday. It was 90°. [Gatecrasher]
• Heidi Klum gets naked in her new coffee-table book, Rankin's Heidilicious, out in October. She says: "It's very naughty. I've been shooting with this photographer, Rankin, for seven years, and working with him is fun because he always makes me look different. And he always gets me to take my clothes off for some reason. We'll do some job, and then he'll say, 'Why don't we shoot some more things,' and I'll wind up without anything on." [E!]
• Lily Allen looks effing hot on the cover of Elle UK. Inside she says: "I wish I'd never written [my song] 'Not Fair.' You know, the thought honestly - really, honestly - never even occurred to me that it would scare men. I thought it might empower women. I thought women would go: 'Oh God, yes, at last somebody is saying it.' I didn't think it would put me in a position where guys would be like, 'Whoa, no, I'm not sleeping with you in case you write something about it!'" [The Sun]
• Derek Jeter and MInka Kelly: Secretly engaged. [Page Six]
• Anne Heche was on Letterman last night and bashed her ex-husband, Coley Laffoon. She called him a "lazy ass" and when asked by Letterman what Lafdoon does for a living, Heche said: "He goes out to the mailbox and he opens up the little mailbox door and goes, 'Oh! I got a check from Anne! Oh! I got a check from Anne! Yay!'" [People]
• Evan Rachel Wood spills some details about her True Blood character Queen Sophie-Ann: "She's not necessarily a lesbian. Her human partner is a girl, but I'm pretty sure she goes both ways [laughs]. I think vampires are like that in general." In addition, that interview links to an Alexander Skarsgård shower scene. Le sigh. [E!, E!]
• Singer, songwriter, Mandy Moore's husband and now blogger: Ryan Adams will be writing a video game column for website The Awl. [Page Six]
• Mad Men's Christina Hendricks on the big screen! She will star alongside Katherine Heigl and Josh Duhamel in the romance Life As We Know It. [Variety]
• Blake Lively has joined the cast of Ben Affleck's crime thriller The Town, which also stars Jon Hamm. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Paulina Porizkova blogs: "I feel the need to constantly prove I'm not some dumb model." So she reads "lengthy sagas set in hot foreign lands." Her choices include: A Suitable Boy, The Soldier of the Great War, and Rain of Gold. "None of these books are under 500 pages," she writes, "so once read, they can be used to tone biceps or in step class." [Page Six via Modelinia.com]
• Are we supposed to be focusing on Carrie Ann Inaba's crotch in this "spay or neuter today" PETA ad? [People]
• Tom Sizemore: Charged with spousal battery. [TMZ]
• Bob Dylan's Christmas album: Not a joke. [NY Daily News]
• "Malaysia's government has barred Muslims from a concert by U.S. hip-hop stars the Black Eyed Peas next month because the event is organized by Irish beer giant Guinness, an official said Thursday." [AP]
• The new Darren Aronofsky film Black Swan has an explicit sex scene — "not just nice sweet innocent sex, we're talking ecstasy-induced, hungry, angry sex." This paper claims: "No wonder Darren didn't want Rachel Weisz, mother to his three-year-old child, to star." Huh. Well. Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis will star instead. [Daily Express]
• Joanne Woodward will take over her late husband Paul Newman's film project, Lucky Them, starring Marisa Tomei, which starts shooting in the fall. [Page Six]
• T-Mobile is pushing myTouch 3G, the product competing with the iPhone, and Whoopi Goldberg will star in some of the ads. Way less creepy than that Palm Pre lady. [AdWeek]
• A source close to Ryan O'Neal says there is no truth to the rumor that Redmond is getting his own reality show. [UPI]
• Robin Williams decided to get rid of his body hair for new movie World's Greatest Dad. "I shaved because if you don't, it's, like, animal-rights issues," he says. "With this, I said to [writer-director Bobcat Goldthwait], 'I think for this scene, I should take everything off because at this point he's literally shedding everything.' It's a breakdown, but in a weird way, a positive one." [LA Times]
• Isaiah Washington and his wife have fallen behind on their house payments and face eviction; the landlord claims the former Grey's Anatomy star owes $100,000 in rent. [USA Today]
• "The less and less you 'act,' great. I had a great acting teacher at Juilliard who said, 'Sometimes, Method acting can be like urinating in brown corduroy pants: You feel wonderful, and we see nothing.' " — Robin Williams. [LA Times]
• "I think women are bitchy. That's the difference. They'll smile at you and then kill you. The men just give it right at you. Oprah's just very cold. Oprah, if she don't need you, she don't know you. Streisand, they say she's desperately shy. I think when you've got $600million, take lessons on how not to be shy. If you've got $600million, say hello to everybody. They gave it to you." — Joan Rivers. [Daily Express]
• "Someone is going to take a tweezer to those brows, and I think her hair's going to change up a little bit. It's definitely time for her to sort of grow up a little bit. People are freaking out. There's a huge sort of battle, half the people are like, get them off! And other people are like, no! It's Betty! She's always going to be Betty, but yeah, the braces are gone, the brows are being trimmed, and she's going to get a little bit more of a swoop." — Ana Ortiz, aka Hilda on the upcoming changes on Ugly Betty. [NY Mag]
• "Being German, I had a pretty precise idea of what a German movie star would be like. But I've never been shot at in a film. Most of those scenes are actually quite funny to shoot. The blood is sticky, everything sticks to you and you're pretending to be in pain… I'm a big fan personally. Most actors are. All his movies are performance driven and he writes incredibly well for women. I loved Pam Grier in Jackie Brown." — Diane Kruger, on being in Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds. [HuffPo]
• "Man, we got so beaten over the head for that! It's not like the four boys and I wrote it. You get hired to do it, they give you a script and you learn your lines. If I could have, I would have done the whole thing in German, with subtitles-everyone in dirndls and on swings and milking cows. Each nominee would have had to ride in on a big cow and milk it." — Heidi Klum, on hosting the Emmys last year. [E!]

• Rihanna will appear on the September 14 launch of The Jay Leno Show — her first performance since being assaulted by Chris Brown in February. But she won't be alone:

She's performing "Run This Town" with Jay-Z and Kanye West, which is a track from Jay-Z's new album. [People]

• Matthew Broderick: "I am truly shocked and saddened by the news about my old friend John Hughes. He was a wonderful, very talented guy and my heart goes out to his family." [E!]
• Molly Ringwald: "I was stunned and incredibly sad to hear about the death of John Hughes. He was and will always be such an important part of my life. He will be missed — by me and by everyone that he has touched. My heart and all my thoughts are with his family now." [ET, People]
• Jon Cryer, aka Duckie from Pretty In Pink, on the death of John Hughes: "This is a horrible tragedy. He was an amazing man to work for and with. He respected young actors in a way that made you realize you had to step up your game because you were playing in the big leagues now. That's why he got such great performances out of his actors. My heart goes out to his wife Nancy and their children." [ET]
• Old habits die hard: Amy Winehouse "is still clearly emotional, and seems to suck her thumb when times are bad." Yes, there are pictures. [Daily Mail]
• Paula Abdul may make a deal with American Idol — if they give her what she wants, which is $10 million a year. [TMZ]
• Meanwhile, Paula says: "At this point, there are so many wonderful things that are being offered to me. And I got to take a deep breath, sleep a little ... and go through everything." [AP]
• Um, Constantine Maroulis got his ass kicked trying to defend Paula Abdul's honor or something. [Gatecrasher]
• Blech: Heidi Montag is oompa-loompa orange on her Playboy cover, and covered in dirt. [Perez]
• Hotter than Heidi is 51-year-old Sharon Stone, topless in Paris Match. In the immortal words of Cassie: Stop acting like you haven't seen a titty before. [TheLifeFiles]
• "Jon Gosselin's guide to being a lothario: manipulation and neediness." LOL. A psychotherapist says: "He's picking up a lot of women who are trying to rescue him… Jon's not the faithful type. Men like him are very good at connecting with women, and the woman starts to feel as if he is there for her. But he's just there to boost his own ego." [NY Daily News]
• Despite what was reported in the Post yesterday, Kristin Davis denies that she cut ties as a goodwill ambassador for the human rights group Oxfam. [NY Daily News]
• Paris Hilton and Doug Reinhardt are back together, and were seen on an Air Pacific Flight to Red Bull Island. Yes, Red Bull Island. Not a joke. Can't wait to see them do this again. [Page Six]
• If you have tickets for Madonna's concert in Ljubljana, Slovenia, you are one of a select few: The show's been canceled, and poor ticket sales are reportedly the reason. Although her peeps say "unforeseen logistical difficulties" are the reason. [Reuters]
• From a profile on Charlene Yi: "Ms. Yi walked the short red carpet in wet brown suede shoes and a red cardigan sweater. After posing for pictures, she picked up the olive-drab Army backpack she had left with a publicist after posing for pictures. Ms. Yi told reporters that she had never dated Michael Cera. 'Gossipers!' she yelped. 'You are all gossipers!' Well, why did she pick him to play her onscreen boyfriend in the first place? 'Martin Lawrence passed,' she quipped. Touché!" [Observer]
• Charlene Yi says of Michael Cera: "We were never together. If we were, I'd like to know when that was. And thank God, because it would be devastating to promote this film if I was heartbroken." [The Daily Beast]
• Bethenny Frankel is trying to get pregnant. [Page Six]
• Leonardo DiCaprio: Spotted hanging out with Sports Illustrated swimsuit model, Anne Vyalitsyna. [Page Six]
• Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore were flying to New York when their plane had to make an emergency landing in Las Vegas after the engine overheated. No one was injured, and both actors Tweeted about their experience, because if you don't put it on Twitter, it never happened, right? [People]
• Jermaine Jackson is "cashing in" on Michael Jackson's death by releasing a recording of "Smile," the song he performed at the memorial. Plus, he's working on a series of tribute concerts. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Jermaine says: "In his death, I have found a mission for my life. My existence is now dedicated to spreading Michael's message." [Mirror]
• "Michael Jackson was scheduled to undergo a second physical by an insurance company doctor at the time of his death." [LA Times]
• David Letterman has beat Conan O'Brien in ratings for the fourth week in a row. i'll admit it: I'm on team Dave. [NY Daily News]
• Nora Ephron writes "In Defense of Ryan O'Neal": "Ryan O'Neal had not seen his daughter Tatum in years. He thought she was a Swedish person. I completely understand. The truth is that had I been gay, I might have accidentally made a pass at my own sister in a mall in Las Vegas. So who's to judge? Not me." [HuffPo]
• Queen Latifah and five ladyfriends hit a lesbian party in NYC on Wednesday, and this is news. [Page Six]
• The woman suing Morgan Freeman for flipping her car will have her day in court next year. [USA Today]
• This report claims that Patrick Swayze's fuller face and full head of hair prove that his battle with cancer is going well, even though he is still smoking. [NY Daily News]
• Congrats to SNL's Bill Hader, who will be a dad; his wife is pregnant. [People]
• Aerosmith concerts are postponed while Steven Tyler recovers from falling off of the stage. [USA Today]
• "I had to turn him down. I really hated the idea of Channing Tatum. I told di Bonaventura that this is not the guy to play one of the most feared killers of the 20th Century. I think Mickey Rourke would really be good. He's got that sense of danger, and there's a similarity between the two. But it's not Channing Tatum." — Phil Carlo, who wrote The Ice Man: Confessions of a Mafia Contract Killer. [Page Six]
• "To me, the idea of being an actor and being stuck in Los Angeles — a city that's totally based on one job — is so uninspiring. New York completely fulfills every need I have on a daily basis. I'm madly in love with this city." — Josh Lucas. [Page Six]
• "Resident Evil started out as this fun project. I went in for it as a joke. 'Sure, I'll go make an action movie,' I thought, 'This'll be cool, because my brother loves the video game so much.' It's turned into a steady job. See? [making a fist] The knuckles? They're all cut up. They used to be really soft, but they can't use them any more [in L'Oreal ads]. They use someone else's." — Milla Jovovich. [Guardian]
• "My mom [Bebe Buell] and gran were models and took such good care of their skin I couldn't help but learn. My dad is also full of great beauty advice, like wear your perfume in your belly button and on the soles of your feet so it becomes part of you." — Liv Tyler, to Elle. [Daily Express]
• "I'm always shocked that there's an interesting, full-fledged, ambitiously wrought role for somebody like me, that somebody's willing to put in a movie, it's unusual, that's what I mean by shocked. I'm not shocked because … 'Gosh, me? How do I know how to act?' [Laughs] But there's so many unbelievably talented, richly talented women and men that are older, that just don't get a chance." — Meryl Streep. [Salon]
• "I have this phobia of becoming someone's 'girlfriend.' I have guy friends who have been dating a girl for six months and our other friends don't know her name. They just ask, 'Hey, where's your girlfriend?' And I want to scream, 'OK, her name is Sally, and she's awesome, and you've known her for months. Where did her identity go?'" — Charlene Yi. [The Daily Beast]

Although, this was weird:

It was part of some montage that ran on the jumbo screen.

Hey, did you know that Michael Jackson is the reason that Obama was elected into office?

Did he even ever vote? Jehovah's Witnesses usually don't. (According to Prince.) Sharpton also said, "It was Michael Jackson that brought blacks and whites and Asians and Latinos together." Literally, all I could think was "What about Native Americans?" This dance was in my head all weekend:

Maya Angelou wrote a long-ass poem about Michael and then didn't even go. She had Queen Latifah read it.

Berry Gordy was the first to get up there and really eulogize Michael. He talked about the later singer's good and bad times, and then implied that we're supposed to start calling Michael "The Greatest Entertainer That Ever Lived" from now on. I don't know…"King of Pop" is a lot catchier. And easier.

Magic Johnson talked about Kentucky Fried Chicken.

And Al Sharpton wanted his three kids to know that their father wasn't strange.

Brooke Shields gave a touching eulogy in which she pretty much blew her cover as his beard.

She also said that he was "undoubtedly perched on a crescent moon." But I highly doubt that if he is on the moon that he's "perched." He's moonwalking. Doye.

Then a Congresswoman got up there and ranted and raved for the longest time about the legal system.

As for the performances, there was the big singalong to "We Are the World," for which family and close friends got on stage with a bunch of nobodies holding the mics.

There was also the good:
Stevie Wonder

Usher: I didn't like how "showy" he was, singing to the casket and stuff.

The bad:
Mariah didn't sound good.

Jennifer Hudson and the Arm-Motion People. She sounded great, but what is the deal with interpretive dancing? Also, I totally thought they were singing the song from Working Girl at first.

And the ugly:
John Mayer and his O faces.

• Harry Potter starRupert Grint recently came down with a "mild" case of the swine flu, but has since recovered, thanks to a quick healing potion whipped up by Professor Snape a few days of rest.

• "It has just been confirmed that Rupert Grint has taken a few days out of filming due to a mild bout of swine flu," says Grint's rep, "He has now recovered and is looking forward to joining his fellow cast members at the junket and premieres this week and will then return to filming directly afterwards." The Scourgify charm was then placed on the entire set to ensure that no one else would come down with the illness. You probably don't believe that last bit. Pfft. Muggles. [People]
• Meanwhile, Grint's castmate, Daniel Radcliffe is coming to terms with being Harry Potter: "I would like to think I haven't been influenced by him too much just by playing him for so long. I am thrilled to have this in my life, but it is separate from my life, you know? It's nice to be called Dan. And actually I started correcting people now. You do feel like a bit of an idiot doing that, but at the same time, in the long run it is better for us. I know it's better for me." [LA Times]
• And as for Radcliffe dating Emma Watson? "I'm sorry guys, it's not happening. It's just not. There's something really incestuous about the idea of it."[ShowbizSpy]
• D'oh! Brad Pitt had to be rescued by paparazzi after his motorcycle broke down during one of his rides around L.A. [DailyMail]
• In an example of when keepin' it real goes wrong, Courtney Love trashed a hotel room in true rock star fashion, causing over $5000 in damage and leaving "dirty needles and used feminine hygiene products behind." Yikes. [PageSix]
• Prince will be playing the Montreux Jazz Festival on July 18: tickets are $180 to stand and $443 dollars to sit. No word yet on if you'll get tickets just by singing "but all I can do is just offer you my looooove." [Reuters]
• Allen Klein, who managed such high profile acts as Sam Cooke, The Beatles, and the Rolling Stones, has died at the age of 77. [EW]
• "I've found throughout my career, that sometimes when you share things like that, that you've gone through, it can be very inspirational to other people. And there's times when people inspire me. When there's disillusion about the business, or certain things. Someone says because of you, my daughter loves her body now, and she's a big girl and she looks at you and she says she can do it because you do it. And those stories make me feel good about myself. It makes me not afraid to share certain things."- Queen Latifah [LA Times]
• Pauly Shore is reportedly considering suing Sacha Baron Cohen for "stealing" his idea of "of adopting an African baby as a plot device." [Shakesville]
• Alec Baldwin says he's been urged by an Ohio law firm to consider relocating to the state and running for governor. [UPI]
• "Obviously we have very different personalities - he was a lot more shy than I am. That's because I was allowed to have a normal childhood and he wasn't, so there was a vulnerable side to him that made you want to take care of him and protect him. He was a real paradox, one of the world's greatest performers and obviously very confident on stage, but in real life he was very shy and you really felt for him."-Madonna on Michael Jackson [ShowbizSpy]
• Madonna played tribute to Jackson last night by having an impersonator join her on stage at London's O2 Arena to perform some of Jackson's most famous dance moves and telling the crowd, "Let's give it up for one of the greatest artists the world has ever known." [AP]
• A reader has sent in a clip of the Madonna performance; you can view it here. [YouTube]
• Stevie Wonder plans to sing at Jackson's memorial service at the Staples Center in Los Angeles on Tuesday. [Mirror]
• Jackson will be buried at Forest Lawn Cemetery on Tuesday; his body will be laid to rest without his brain, which will be studied by a forensic neuropathologist in order to provide more clues on what, exactly, led to his death. [Mirror]
• "I just wanted to hear him deal with a romantic relationship with a human being rather than a rat. I'm saying that facetiously, but it's true. I saw him at the Oscars very emotional about "Ben." I wanted to hear him get in touch with a real human relationship. "She's Out of My Life" was written by Tommy Bahler from a very bad ending to a marriage. So it was very real. I was saving it for Sinatra. But I gave it to Michael. And Michael cried during every take, and I left the tears in."- Quincy Jones on Michael Jackson [Details]
• Ian Barkley, Jackson's personal photographer, says that Grace Rwaramba, former nanny to Jackson's children, was also "Jackson's secret girlfriend." [Mirror]
• Barkley also claims that Jackson was an "extremely protective" father: "His kids totally love their dad and he was extremely protective over them. Even when we were just around his staff, he was protective. We would babyproof everywhere, like really expensive suites. They would tape up every corner with cardboard and make sure the kids couldn't hurt themselves, and they were very strict on what the kids would eat to make sure they didn't have allergies." [E!]
• Jackson had a cancerous lesion removed from his nose just days before he passed away. [USWeekly]
• "We seemed to spend most of the time playing around and having a laugh. He became very friendly with my family and we had lots of great times. Although we drifted apart in later years, I will always remember fondly the fun we had working and playing together. My family and I send our deepest condolences to his family. We know that his great talent will never be forgotten." -Paul McCartney on Michael Jackson [TheSun]
• Over 1.2 million people have registered in order to obtain tickets to Jackson's memorial service; only 17,500 tickets are actually available. [Reuters]
• Major television networks, including ABC, CNN, and MSNBC, plan to run live coverage of Jackson's memorial service, starting Tuesday morning at 10am PDT. [Yahoo]
• Matt Damon, who handed off his "Sexiest Man Alive" title to Hugh Jackman, says he hopes Jackman wins again this year: "Maybe he can be the first to do it back-to-back. I'll start campaigning for that." [People]
• Azharuddin Ismail, who played Salim in Slumdog Millionaire, has finally moved into a new home thanks to the Jai Ho Trust, a fund set up by the film's producers. Ismail's earlier home, "a tarpaulin and sheet hut" was demolished in May. [Reuters]
• After 10 years together, David and Victoria Beckham have been named "the perfect married couple" in a survey taken by Wedding TV. [Telegraph]
• Mia Michaels, the choreographer who is helping Katie Holmes prepare her charity performance on So You Think You Can Dance says Holmes is a "brilliant" dancer. "She's really blossoming into a gorgeous triple-threat star," Michaels says. [People]
• Blind Item: "This male Celebrity Musician has an addiction. It's not what you think. Not drugs, or sex or even rock'n'roll, no, his addiction is to the internet. That's right, this Celeb is probably part of your online community. He loves celeb gossip, loves computer games, and even allegedly writes some steamy fan fic! The guy is online all the time, reading what you write, reading about himself and his loved ones, reading about his enemies and posting comments and pics, just like us!" [BlindGossip]
• Seth MacFarlane entertained 600 guests at his housewarming party by performing a medley in front of a 45-piece orchestra, garnering "polite applause" from his audience. [Page Six]
• "I am very flattered my gay friends enjoy my work. Gay, straight, I'll take anybody at this point, hermaphrodites."- Katie Couric [PageSix]

• Britney shouted, "What's up London?" at a recent gig… In Manchester. Mancunians were irritated. [Daily Mail]

• Beyoncé backed out of a performance at a club in New York — and the club owner says he's already spent $100,000 preparing for the show. Lawsuit threat! [Page Six]
• Rihanna is expected in court on Monday as a witness in Chris Brown's assault case; her testimony will not be televised. [CNN]
• Angelina was taping Anderson Cooper 360 for World Refugee Day and said: "I usually just explain to [my kids] that there are other families in the world that aren't as fortunate as ours and other kids'...And so I tell them that it's important for all of us to do what we can and then go to these places and understand what's happening, Hopefully I'll take them to as many countries as I can and raise them with an education of the world." [E!]
• Here's a transcript of Anderson Cooper's interview with Angelina. [CNN]
• Oh for the love of God. Someone has their hands on a sex tape starring Leighton Meester — Blair from Gossip Girl — and it involves her "very talented feet." [TMZ]
• Jessica Alba has sent a donation to the United Way after defacing on of their billboards. Good idea! [E!]
• Sacha Baron Cohen wore a bull outfit in Spain yesterday. As you can see in this picture, his black costume had horns, a prominent penis and a hooves. He was attended by cute bullfighters. [USA Today]
• Katherine Heigl is staying on for season six of Grey's Anatomy. [E!]
• If Jill Scott is nominated for an Emmy for The No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency and wins, she'll be the first African-American actress to have a best TV drama actress award. [LA Times]
• Dina Lohan, a little late on the uptake, has commented that her daughter Lindsay Lohan had nothing to do with the jewelry theft from an Elle photo shoot. Yeah. We know. Dina also says: "Last month her personal cell was posted online and now her phone messages have been hacked. This must stop. She is a 22-year-old girl who needs to live her life in peace. The tabloids need to leave her alone with all the lies and reporting with no proof." [People]
• Just what you always wanted: Jennifer Love Hewitt is writing a dating book called The Say I Shot Cupid. "I thought it was time to share the real story of what I've learned navigating the dating waters," she says. "Hopefully, in addition to having a good laugh, women reading this will learn from some of my hard lessons." [People]
• Shanna Moakler, who resigned as president from the Miss California USA organization, says: "If Donald Trump gives his blessing, I'll be back in a heartbeat." [E!]
• Hmm: Did Olive Garden pull its ad dollars from David Letterman's show after his kerfluffle with Sarah Palin? [Ad Age]
• Conan O'Brien is beating David Letterman in certain demographics, but Letterman is close behind in total viewers. [Variety]
• "Today I begin my fast for Darfur." — Maria Bello. [Huffington Post]
• Oh, dear: Amy Winehouse is causing trouble on St. Lucia. Just by being there! An "influential local newspaper proprietor" believes that Amy's stay on the island is good publicity; a former government spin doctor says Amy should have been arrested and kicked out of the country by "the morality police." [Guardian]
• In this story, Beth Ditto goes off on Katy Perry and her "party song" "I Kissed A Girl." Ditto says: "As a gay person, it's like, 'Oh, of course this straight person singing about kissing a girl goes straight to Top 40 and people buy this record. Who can give a fuck about real gay people?' That's what's really painful about the whole thing." [Spinner]
• George Michael was banned from driving for 2 years, but now he's back behind the wheel, with a new car: a $200,000 Ferrari California. Something subtle and low-profile. [Luxist]
• Au revoir! David and Victoria Beckham are thinking of selling their home ins the South of France. [The Sun]
• David Archuleta's dad has pleaded no contest to "patronizing" a prostitute in a Salt Late City massage parlor. And he doesn't mean he was condescending to her. He means he was a customer! He paid a $582 fine and completed a counseling class. [USA Today]
• LeAnn Rimes is not getting a divorce, says LeAnn's rep. [E!]
• Josie Bissett will return to Melrose Place — as a guest star. [People]
• Do Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo live under a rock? They have never heard of Susan Boyle. [Us Magazine]
• "Susan Boyle was dropped from a second Britain's Got Talent concert last night after launching into a bizarre rant over her beloved cat Pebbles." [Daily Mail]
• In this interview, Tyrese refers to himself in the third person and says: "I believe that people are going to love Transformers 2." Of course you do. [USA Today]
• OMG. If Susanne Bartsch had been on the Real Housewives Of New York it would have been a much different show. She is a legend, a spectacle and a freak show — rolled into one — in the best possible way. [NY Mag]
• Check out this zany interview with Bob Odenkirk and David Cross, the Mr. Show duo, who are reuniting for a string of Chicago shows. [Milwaukee Decider]
• You've gotta love these pictures of Sienna Miller "stumbling" out a club with rumored romantic interest, Irish comedian Patrick Kielty — her hair's disheveled and he's got a cocktail in his hand as he sits in the cab. [Daily Mail]
• But wait! Don't miss these pictures of Kate Moss writhing on stage with Pink Floyd's David Gilmour as she sings at a karaoke party. [Daily Mail]
• LOL: Robin Wright Penn calls Keanu Reeves a "gentle giant." [The Star]
• When asked about Sean Penn, Robin joked: "Thank God somebody's staying with the kids!" [Mirror]
• "Heidi Fleiss speaks up for tropical birds." [Sadie Frost is 44 and single and just hosted a speed-dating night, which is "news." [Daily Express]
• Common and Queen Latifah will star in a sports romance called Just Wright, in which a sports trainer finds herself falling in love with a professional basketball player while rehabilitating him from a career-threatening injury. [Variety]
• Kevin Williamson is working on a new Scream trilogy, but Neve Campbell refuses to be in it. Williamson's Twitter reads: "This sucks." [ONTD]
• Hollywood is out of ideas, part MCDLXXXV: Teen Wolf remake. On the way. [Movie Hole]
• Gravely ill: Walter Cronkite. [NY Post]
• Jeremy Piven hasn't eaten fish in 10 months. [People]
• Blind item! "Which music mogul looks at himself in the mirror every morning and recites an ode to his greatness?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I would love to do [a movie about] Harriet Tubman. I think maybe one day a slave epic. Apart from Roots, which was on television, I don't think there's been a serious film dealing with slavery in this country. It would need alternative means of finance. It's not something that you could get made through the traditional Hollywood system." — from "10 Questions With Spike Lee." [Time]
• "Jennifer does not share the same sense of humor as me - she did not like my jokes. I was picking on [Jen's husband] Ben Affleck and making fun of him because I've known him for a really long time - I was talking smack - and Jennifer goes, 'You know, if you keep saying stuff about him, I'm going to kick your ass.' And she could - I've seen Alias. She has a real girly sense of humor and didn't understand that I was kidding." — Kevin Smith. [Gatecrasher]
• "It feels to me like [the band] has run its course at the moment. I'm not going to quit making music, and I probably will make some more Nine Inch Nails stuff down the road. But I'm going to try some different things now." — Trent Reznor says NIN is going on hiatus after a summer tour. [Newsweek]
• "If there's any turmoil, I think it's managing all of it, but having an incredible team that helps me do that it makes it very easy, or easier than it would normally be attempting to do it myself." — Usher on filing for divorce. [Mirror]
• "I'm embarrassed to say it was my first time voting-but my guy got in." — Ginuwine, who never paid attention to politics until Barack Obama came along. [US News & World Report]
• "Maybe because she doesn't look anything special, people identify with her. I get letters all the time from people who think she is real, and they give me fashion tips for dressing better, telling me that if I smarten myself up I'll be able to stand up to everyone better at the magazine." — America Ferrera, on her Ugly Betty character. [Daily Mail]
• "Right now I'm shouting out to real dads. Some are great role models with real academic achievements. Some are not ... We deserve the love!!! We put up with everything, standing true to what's real and letting life take its course protecting our household, our woman, our children, our family ... Biggest Shout To My Son On The Way!!" — Nas. (Wait, what?) [TMZ]
• "There was lot of material to memorize… Curb is improvised and I'm making it up as I go along in many cases. Here, I was doing someone else's words, which was really a pleasure, because you can get pretty sick of being yourself every minute of every day. To actually have a chance to say someone else's words, no less Woody Allen's, was fun." — Larry David, on being in Whatever Works. [WSJ]
• "I've been wearing similar outfits to Lady GaGa for years across Europe while I've been promoting my records. Now when I wear outrageous costumes people say I'm copying her. It really annoys me. She stole my look and I want it back." — Swedish singer September, who appears to favor rubber and blonde hair. [The Sun]
• "My parents' generation wasn't so good at that… Now, I try to talk to my kids - they don't want to hear it from me. They know." — Michelle Pfeiffer on giving the bird and bees talk. [NY Magazine]
• "I've known Sacha since he did Bruno when he was a young man and my son is named Bruno after him – partly after Bruno!" — Nigella Lawson. [Daily Express]
• "Back then everyone wanted their body to look like mine. Women would say: 'I've worked out for five years to look like you.' I'd trained constantly for the film, but I couldn't sustain my fitness." — Linda Hamilton's Terminator biceps hit the screen 25 (?!?) years ago. [Daily Mail]
• "Man, I'm not into that stuff. All I need is a brush. That and some Carol's Daughter Body Butter to keep off the ash. My family, we use this stuff at home. I wish I had the time to get manicures and pedicures, but the season is so crazy. Some people make the time, but I don't." — LeBron James, as he got a cucumber-and-lavender manicure. [NY Mag]
• "Who am I? I'm just another schmendrick who used to be in a goy band. I don't know what the hell that means either, but I'm pretty sure that's supposed to be funny… Ok, that's enough schtick in the box from me." — Justin Timberlake's jokes at an event at the United Jewish Federation, where his record label boss, Barry Weiss, was being honored. [AP]

• Miley Cyrus and Justin Gaston have split after less than a year together. A source says the breakup was a result of Miley's traveling, and not Nick Jonas, although he and Miley "have been spending time together." [Us]

• Adam Lambert's debut album is set to drop in the fall. He says, "It's going to be ridiculous! Get Ready!!!" [People]
• And Lambert's "official coming out cover of Rolling Stone" apparently includes a disturbingly-placed snake. [Perez Hilton]
• Megan Fox is in favor of legalizing marijuana. If it ever happened, she says, she'd be the "first person in line to buy a pack of joints." [TMZ]
• In what is perhaps the most superficial news item ever, Heidi Montag Pratt is starting a dry shampoo line inspired by her hair care experiences on I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here!. [Life & Style]
• Also, Heidi and Spencer have left the show for real this time. Hollywood publicist Michael Levine says, "the audience is also ridiculous for partnering in their absurdity." Well, yeah. [ABC]
• Adam Ant credits his comeback from "his deranged and bloated appearance" seven years ago to regular exercise and his girlfriend Clare, who makes sure he eats "only the finest healthy food." [Daily Mail]
• DJ Jazzy Jeff "stormed off the stage" at Kansas City venue Power & Light District, and later said managers stopped the show "for playin' hip hop." The managers say they just wanted him to turn the music down. [Breitbart]
• Okay, so maybe Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore didn't invite Susan Boyle to sing at their anniversary. [Telegraph]
• On September 9, Natalie Cole will give her first concert after her kidney transplant and her sister's death. [AP, via Yahoo News]
• David Carradine's ex-wife says he once suspended himself from a rope in a crucifixion position while she was giving a party. When she asked him what he was doing, he said, "I really would like a sandwich." [TMZ]
• The Thai police say the FBI can get involved in investigating Carradine's death, but only in an "observer role." [TMZ]
• And photos of Carradine's body show that the rope around his neck was knotted in the front, making it more likely his death was an accident. Apparently people who practice bondage frequently knot ropes in the front for easier release. [TMZ]
• Thirty-four-year-old Enrique Iglesias says he's not yet "mature" enough to father Anna Kournikova's children. [TMZ]
• A new play about Kurt Cobain is running in London, but will it be as good as Christopher Walken's play about Elvis? [Independent]
• Bret Michaels broke his nose and split his lip when he was hit by a falling sign at the Tony Awards, but he was apparently really nice about it. [People]
• Emeril Lagasse helped Jon and Kate Gosselin prepare a meal for their 100th episode. The menu included green bean casserole, chili macaroni, and, oddly, granola. [People]
• A Toni Braxton impersonator accused of telling a Suriname audience she was the real Toni Braxton has been acquitted. WTF. [AP, via Yahoo News]
• Mike Tyson has married his girlfriend after the death of their daughter Exodus. [Radar Online]
• Shanna Moakler surprisingly took the high road in response to Travis Barker's defamatory tweets. She had her reps tell OK!, "Shanna is not going to play out her personal relationships in the media." Her relationship to Carrie Prejean's breasts is another story.[Perez Hilton]
• Depeche Mode has resumed its tour after singer Dave Gahan's cancer surgery. [NYT]
• In potentially disturbing news for St. Lucia's youth, Amy Winehouse has pledged to help them. [Mirror]
• OK! is taking Emma Watson's statement that "there's something going on" between Robert Pattinson and Kristin Stewart as proof that they are together. [OK!]
• But Watson's publicist says the statement is made up! [Perez Hilton]
• Some sources say Leonardo Dicaprio and Bar Rafaeli have broken up. [People]
• Others say they are still together, but "miserable-looking." [TMZ]
• Paris Hilton loves Doug Reinhardt, but not Kim Kardashian — according to Doug Reinhardt. [E! Online]
• Anika Noni Rose says Jennifer Hudson will be a great mom. "It's been a harrowing year for her and I hope that she finds comfort, joy and support and that she can move forward with her new baby," Rose adds. [People]
• Prince reportedly needs two hip replacements, but refuses because, as a Jehovah's Witness, he can't get a blood transfusion. [Showbiz411.com]
• A tabloid reporter slyly questions whether Brooke Shields's mom really has dementia, then says he and Teri Shields were great friends and that "most of our wonderful afternoons together never resulted in a story." What a saint. [National Enquirer]
• Terrence Howard says the Obamas should go to Prague on one of their date nights, because it is "an untapped resource of love and romance," while Paris is "overused." Russell Simmons thinks they should go to a yoga studio. [Politico]
• "I went to see Andrea Bocelli last night. The first time I've been out in months. The Hollywood Bowl allowed me to use my wheelchair." — Elizabeth Taylor, via Twitter [CNN]
• "I think I'm either naive or insane to play her - maybe a little bit of both!" — Anne Hathaway, on playing Judy Garland in an upcoming biopic [Daily Express]
• "I have a body that girls can look at and go, Oh she's not anorexically skinny. She looks healthy and she's got cellulite, yeah!" — Hayden Panettiere [E! Online]
• "(These shows) are a reflection of our society. You hear kids saying that they want to be famous, and when you ask them what for, they don't know - they just want to be famous. It's like there is this lack of passion in the doing of something that that might bring you riches. When I was little, I never said I wanted to be famous, I said I wanted to be a musician." — Lenny Kravitz, on reality shows [Daily Express]
• "He violated me. I never told anybody. I just buried it as deeply as I could and kept people at an arms length. I never really let a person get too close to me. I could have been married years ago, but I had a commitment issue." — Queen Latifah, speaking out for the first time about her childhood sexual abuse [The Sun]
• "Just know that this too shall pass.… Next week, it will be someone else on the cover [of magazines] and you can go about your life." — the sage Tori Spelling, advising Jon and Kate Gosselin on their notoriety [LA Times]

The Good: It's hard to refrain from use of the word "regal" when the Queen brings it like this.


The Good: Tovah Borgnine was honored last night. Husband Ernie introduced her and was apparently proud as punch. They look charming.


The Good: Samantha Harris shows why 60's revival Olympian nymph is perennially fun for summer.


The Good: Let's just say it: I hate Hilary Rhoda's spiderweb shoes and gladiator booties foreshorten the leg something awful. But. This sculptural neutral is chic and interesting enough to overcome my aversion!


The Bad: I have a terrible feeling this is Paris Hilton's attempt at intellectual fashion!


The Bad: It's a family affair! At first glance Kathy Hilton's frock looked just fine, even pretty. Then I noticed the peephole. Then I noticed the nude bra clearly visible under the peephole.


What Say You? As usual, Kate Walsh looks, let's just say it, dope. But what do we think of her (truly outrageous) Gem costume?


Again, Mary J rocks it. But what Say You of the Edenic fall-via-Woodstock that is her gown?

[Images via Getty]

• And then there were seven?!?! Angelina Jolie reportedly told one of the Slumdog kids that she is planning to adopt an Indian orphan. The papers will surely turn this into a race with Madonna. [Telegraph]

• So you know how Lindsay Lohan has a $115,000 Maserati but no job? Turns out a "porn king" loaned her the car, no strings attached. Uh-huh. Right. [TMZ]
• This UK paper is calling Madonna a "manipulator" who will "stop at nothing" to adopt a second child. They're saying she dressed conservatively for her court appointment, when she actually is way more wild, divorced and a Kabbalah enthusiast. Apparently Malawaians "take their Christianity seriously." Well, she did date Jesus! [Daily Mail]
• Hmm. Madonna wore a $2800 Chanel tracksuit while in Malawi. [Telegraph]
• The mark on Katie Holmes' back is indeed troubling. Scientology? Melanoma? [Perez]
• Countess Luann de Lesseps of Real Housewives has split with Count de Lesseps. He is "with an Ethiopian woman" now. Does this mean Luann is still a countess? Are any of the Housewives actual wives? So many questions. [Page Six]
• Meanwhile, Vicki Gunvalson of the California Real Housewives has been receiving death threats from an obsessed female fan who "takes the show way too seriously." [Yahoo via E!]
• The latest on Britney Spears is that while her dad was away, she hooked up with a backup dancer. His name is Glo, and she bought him some clothes and shoes. But now that her dad is back? "It's basically over," says a source. As you'll recall, the last time Brit picked up a backup dancer she got married and had two kids. [Gatecrasher]
• Halle Berry is "mentally ready" for more kids, FYI. [Mirror]
• "I'm not engaged. If she is engaged we have a problem." — Justin Timberlake on Jessica Biel. [The Star]
• Miley Cyrus says there won't be any more Hannah Montana movies. Also, she says if you're a young kid trying to decide between college or potential stardom: "Be a freak. Go to Hollywood." [Yahoo News via AP]
• The rumors that Rihanna is not cooperating with the D.A.'s office? Untrue. A rep for the D.A. says: "We have been in contact with her attorney, and he has always said she is a cooperating victim." [E!]
• Queen Latifah is being sued by a makeup artist and a fashion stylist, who claim she failed to pay them. At stake? $1 million. [Yahoo News via AP]
• ScarJo and RyRen went on a motorcycle ride. [Socialite Life]
• Drew Barrymore is back with Justin Long — in the movies, at least. He'll play her boyfriend in a romcom called Going The Distance, about what else? A long-distance relationship. [E!]
• Zac Efron dropped out of the Footloose remake, and now Gossip Girl's Chace Crawford is auditioning. Similarly pretty, but charismatic? Uh… [E!]
• Michelle Rodriguez will kick your ass if you try and snap her picture when she is not feeling well and sitting in a wheelchair at the Mexico City airport. [E!]
• Ben Affleck and Matt Damon are still friends, in case you were wondering. [People]
• When Jennifer Lopez arrived at LAX from Japan yesterday, Jenny from the block had 11 bags. [Daily Mail]
• Andie MacDowell, Mike Myers and Ed Westwick (!) took part in a kilt fashion show. Men in skirts! [The Star, Daily Mail]
• André 3000 was busted for going 109 mph in a 65 mph zone. He drives a Porshce? You'd think it would be a model T or something to match his plus-fours. [E!]
• Congrats to Alyson Hannigan, who had a baby girl — on her birthday. [ET]
• If instead of sparkly vampires, you like actual boodsuckers with fangs, take note: True Blood returns June 14. Season 2 photos at the link. [E!]
• Epic! Law & Order: SVU will be shooting at the U.N. [CNN]
• Star Trek hasn't yet hit theaters but they're already talking sequel. And Lost cocreator Damon Lindelof could be on board. [E!]
• The Karate Kid remake will be called Kung Fu Kid, says Jackie Chan. [EW]
• Friends, here is a picture of Sir Paul McCartney with his fly open. [Daily Mail]
• Friday Night Lights: Renewed for two more seasons. [EW]
• Blind item! "Which pretty young songbird is freaking out male paramours with her overly hairy tummy?" [Gatecrasher]
• "It doesn't mean no more musicals forever, but right now I had so much fun doing (new comedy film) 17 Again that I think that's the direction I want to head in." — Zac Efron, on why he pulled out of the Footloose remake. [The Star]
• "Max and I are really good friends. We were just too young. That's all it was. I still love the idea that we did it. I love the idea I can tell my kids one day about it and I know he does too. It just got really crazy. It was something that exploded. And then it ended. And now we're just back to being friends, which is so much better." — Peaches Geldof, 20, who doesn't regret her six-month marriage. [The Sun]
• "After this album and tour I have a brand new business I am setting up, but i can't say what it is yet. I am definitely considering quitting music." — Lily Allen. [This Is London]
• "If you've got a character, particularly on TV, you can watch him doing nothing if you like him. If you haven't got a great character, you could be delivering the greatest lines in the world, but who cares? There are stand-ups that just aren't likable. They can have the best lines in the world, but you go, (yawn) 'Yeah. Brilliant. Don't like you though.' Whereas, someone shambles out and they're a putz and they get their hands dirty and they tell you what a bad day they've had, you want to hug them. They don't say anything funny, they are funny." — Ricky Gervais. [Yahoo via AP]
• "I think they prerecord the backgrounds in the studio and maybe the backgrounds are a little lip-synced. But I think the solos are definitely live. Because these kids aren't dancers and they're trying to do choreography, that's why it happens … if it happens at all." — American Idol judge Randy Jackson, on the lip-sync controversy. [Gatecrasher]
• "Kissing him wasn't bad at all. Justin's a sweetheart, and the whole shoot felt very organic. It all flowed so well." — Ciara, on smooching Timberlake in her new video for "Sex Love Magic." [Gatecrasher]
• "We were going to a Mexican restaurant and he and I were the first ones in. We sat opposite each other. He looked at me. It was a look that wasn't sexual; it was almost evil. It was like rape except it wasn't sexual. I just burst into tears. I never forgave him for it. It was cruel. I think maybe he fell into what he does sometimes with women. He had no right to do that. I was helpless. I got mad at him, and I never talked to him again." — Cloris Leachman on Marlon Brando. [LA Times]

• Madonna and Jesus have broken up, if you believe that she Twitters, which this paper does. Meanwhile, she's allegedly on her way to Malawi to adopt another kid. [Daily Mail]

• According to the papers, her Madgesty is 2 days away from adopting a second child from Malawi. That seems… speedy. [The Sun, Mirror]
• Lindsay Lohan's latest flick, Labor Pains, will never hit theaters: It's going to premiere on ABC Family, then go to DVD. This is the flick in which LL plays a woman who fakes being pregnant to keep from being fired. Hilarious? [Access Hollywood]
• Rihanna was seen "smiling and flirting" with a group of guys — including Brody Jenner — at Nobu in New York on Wednesday. She also has a blond, female security guard, which is kind of awesome. [Page Six]
• Last night, Rihanna was seen dancing at a Hollywood night club. [TMZ]
• Amy Winehouse's latest Facebook status reads "If you love him, let him go." [The Sun]
• Warning: Celebrities have Twitter ghostwriters. Where do we apply? [NY Times]
• Wow, Shawn Johnson is making quite a bit of cash to appear on Dancing WIth The Stars — if she goes all the way she could take home over $350,000. [E!]
• Speaking of DWTS, Holly Madison has been experiencing pain in her rib area. Bad enough that she's on meds. This show is dangerous! [E!]
• Kate Middleton, Prince William's girlfriend, has a pal named Emma Sayle. Apparently Emma runs sex parties called Killing Kittens, for single women and couples. Racy! [The Sun]
• Courtney Love versus a designer on Etsy: Guess who called someone a "vile horrible lying bitch"? Hint: The rock star. [E!]
• The designer also claims Courtney Love called her an "asswipe nasty lying hosebag thief." [TMZ]
• Jennifer Hudson has set a date for her wedding, but it's a secret. [Mirror]
• Queen Latifah has been cast in a romcom described as modern day Cinderella story; she'll play a physical therapist who falls in love with a basketball player while helping him recover from a career-threatening injury. [Variety]
• What the world needs now: A Ben Hur mini-series. [Variety]
• Rapper T.I. will be sentenced today for weapons possession; he will probably get a year. He's already done 1,000 hours of community service. [CNN]
• Donna Martin, aka Tori Spelling, returns to 90210 on Tuesday. Plus: Diablo Cody drops by. Stuntcasting means someone really really wants you to watch. [E!]
• Seriously, what is Courteney Cox's Cougar Town show really about? Every shot we ever see is CC in a robe. [Socialite Life]
• Something stinks: NBC is yanking cooking competition show Chopping Block off the air and replacing it with repeats of Law & Order: Criminal Intent. [Yahoo via Reuters]
• Survivor winner Richard Hatch wants to get out of jail. [Yahoo via AP]
• So you know that shaggy coat Pixie Geldof wore? She had a matching dress underneath. [Daily Mail]
• A witness claims to have seen two dudes get off of rapper Flo Rida's tour bus, kill a rabbit, and then get back on. Now Flo Rida is being questioned by police. [Socialite Life]
• Former Eight is Enough and Charles in Charge star Willie Aames is broke and having a big garage sale in suburban Kansas City; he filed for bankruptcy last year and his home is in foreclosure. I want Charles in charge of me? [Yahoo via AP]
• Eddie Cibrian, recently accused of cheating on his wife with LeAnn Rimes, was photographed holding hands with his wife at Miami airport yesterday. Damage control? [TMZ]
• Got $150 million? You can buy the late Aaron Spelling's mansion: 56,500 square feet of space on more than 4.6 acres. There's a bowling alley, wine cellar, wine tasting room, gift-wrapping room, a humidity-controlled silver storage room, China room, library, gym, and, of course, screening room. [Yahoo via AP]
• Green Day is back, with an eight studio album out May 15th. [EW]
• Blind item! Which A-list hunk got elbowed in the face by a girl after demanding she get him a bag of blow? The damsel clocked him after he called her a few (unprintable) names. [Gatecrasher]
• I like any job where you can just shut yourself away from everybody." — Robert Pattinson. [Mirror]
• We schedule it out. We force ourselves to do it. There's always an excuse for a couple not to take time for themselves, but it's really short sighted. The first thing you'd better do is make a date as soon as that baby comes. You'd better make a date and take your wife out within a month - whether you want to, or not - and you can't talk about the kid. And you'd better have a romantic weekend within two months because it tears couples apart, these babies do. Felicity and I have been really good about finding time. We'll go away for two days - for one day, even - and we try to do it four, five, six times a year." — William H. Macy, on keeping a marriage alive when you have kids. [Mirror]
• She has the partying part down right. But I don't think she's got the focus. I mean, it requires a lot of focus and a lot of people think they can do it, but they really find that it's a lot harder. Ask anyone - it's a lot harder than it looks. I guess that's why they call us supermodels - we make it look easy. But it's not as easy as it looks, so I wish her all the best." — Tyson Beckford on Lindsay Lohan. [Perez]
• "Because I got high, I forgot to pay. It was stupid. I'm an idiot for that." — Method Man, on owing back taxes. [Gatecrasher]
• "I think the last thing I should be doing right now is planning a wedding. I'd become one of those cracked-out housewives with a vacuum cleaner, hopped up on Dexedrine." — Kelly Osbourne, who just left rehab for her painkiller addiction. [Mirror]

• OMG! Project Runway's Tim Gunn will host the red-carpet arrivals at the official Academy Awards pre-show? Genius. Good Morning America's Robin Roberts and Entertainment Weekly's Jess Cagle will join him. Excellent. Carry on! [Variety]

• Prince is having an late-night Oscar bash, and Prince has decided that Prince will perform. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Oh dear: An L.A. woman has filed a $4 billion class action lawsuit against Miley Cyrus, claiming the Disney teen knowingly mocked Asians in a recent photo. Shit, meet fan. [TMZ]
• Margaret Cho thinks Miley Cyrus is "a disgrace." [Perez]
• Did you see Joaquin Phoenix on Letterman last night? You'll find what happened in the dictionary under "trainwreck." (Or at the link here.) [Nikki Finke's Deadline Hollywood]
• Post-steroid-scandal, Alex Rodriguez "ran right home to [wife] Cynthia," which has pissed off Madonna. She's telling A-Rod that her dalliance with Jesus Luz is just a publicity stunt; Rodriguez says he needs to salvage his career. According to this piece, "Now that he's unable to focus all his attention on Madonna, she only wants him more." [Gatecrasher]
• Holy crap: Michael Jackson has some kind of MRSA-type skin infection, like a flesh-eating virus or a staph infection, and it is sad and horrifying. Plus, from the looks of this picture, it hurts. [The Sun]
• Prince Harry has been formally disciplined after being caught on video calling a fellow soldier a racial slur. He will attend an equality and diversity course, and the incident will go on his permanent record. [Mirror, Guardian]
• What is the deal with George Clooney and Benazir Bhutto's 26-year-old niece, Fatima? Pakistan is "besotted" by their "affair." [Independent]
• Clooney's rep says the rumor that Clooney is dating Fatima is false. [WowOwow]
• Lily Allen had a "secret show" last night in New York, and in addition to material from her new album — the bouncy "Fuck You" and stuff from her old CD ("Smile") she covered Britney's "Womanizer." While singing about blow jobs, she "gulped wine" on stage. [Rolling Stone]
• Nicolette Sheridan is packing up her stuff and leaving Wisteria Lane; she will no longer be on Desperate Housewives. [Extra]
• Mary-Kate Olsen looks high fashion freaky in her pictures for the March issue of Interview; she tells the mag about differentiating herself from her sister: "We've always been very different. And we've always had the same goals… At a certain point, we probably just started to vocalize it. When we decided to go to college, we figured we'd be able to take a break and just figure out what we wanted to do and what we loved… just by being able to step away from the work world." [ONTD]
• Queen Latifah was on a bus tour of Newark, N.J. yesterday to promote options that will help homeowners avoid foreclosures. [UPI]
• Had Rihanna been working on a song about murdering a cheating partner before she was attacked by Chris Brown? [The Sun]
• Chris Brown is currently holed up at the Hard Rock Hotel in Vegas. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Except that this report says Chris Brown and Rhianna are both in L.A. Oh, and don't click this link unless you want to read a whole lot of bullshit speculation about how Rihanna maybe hit Chris first and "Lamborghini's [sic] have small cabins that are hard to maneuver in. Brown, who would have been driving, could have used his teeth as a weapon to defend himself against Rihanna's flailing." [Fox 411]
• Sigh, there is a delay in the Chris Brown case. The D.A spokesperson says: "It's our understanding the LAPD won't return the case to us this week. Once we get it, we will review it again to determine if there's a case." Wait, what? [People]
• Here's a better explanation of whether Chris should be charged with criminal threats or the lesser charge of domestic battery. [TMZ]
• Cops will reinterview Chris Brown and Rihanna again soon. [NY Daily News]
• Chris Brown's wardrobe stylist says: "Chris is all right. He's a good kid. He feels very bad that something like this has happened." Ugh! Passive talk. He feels bad "something happened" or he feels bad about what he did? [People]
• Leona Lewis denies involvement in the Chris Brown/Rihanna situation. [Daily Mail]
• When asked by paparazzi about Chris Brown, Terrence Howard said: "Chris is a great guy. He'll be all right." Now he says: "When they asked me about Chris Brown the other day, I was in no way aware of what he had been accused of. Had I known, I would have never had said something so insensitive." Seriously dude? Put down the baby wipes and pick up a newspaper or something. [E!]
• Clive Owen continues to promote his film and charm the underpants off of us. [CBS News]
• Drew Barrymore says Adam Sandler was her favorite on-screen kiss. "It was really innocent and unsalacious." [Mirror]
• Whoa: Nicolas Sarkozy proposed to Carla Bruni within two hours of meeting her. [Daily Mail]
• Groan: Sports Illustrated cover moddle Bar Refaeli ate cheeseburgers and ice cream before her shoot and did not work out. [Gatecrasher]
• Will Sean Penn be in a Three Stooges biopic? [Page Six]
• Balthazar Getty's exit from Brothers & Sisters will be "shocking." Spoilers all there if you click the link. [E!]
• Sam Shepard pled guilty to DUI and speeding from that bust last month in Illinois — he had a .175 blood alcohol level. Drunkety drunk drunk drunk. [TMZ]
• Kate Hudson has a stripper pole in her bathroom and a spy says: "She's so proud of it. She was laughing and giddy like a kid when the thing was installed! She holds on with both her arms and flips her legs into the air. It's kind of amazing and totally sexy." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Joe Francis is no longer on house arrest. He's free to go wild. [TMZ]
• Steven Seagal wants Costa Rica to have a filmmaking industry. "Costa Rica has everything — both rain forest and dry climate. What it lacks is an infrastructure to make movies," he said in a news conference. Send us plane tickets and let us judge for ourselves! [Reuters]
• Akon has a Chevron gas station in his backyard. [The Life Files]
• Blind item! "Which pro athlete's actress-girlfriend is going to be less than pleased when she discovers he's sleeping with college girls on the side?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Any actor who starts taking 'sex symbol' seriously or thinks of themselves as a sex symbol has got some serious problems. When I'm in my normal life I care very little about how I look. Sometimes I have to dress up when I'm making movies, but that's not me when I'm just hanging around. I don't mind looking like I need a good wash and a good meal. There's no vanity about my character and I think that's real. His absolute obsessive passion is trying to bring a bank down. He doesn't care how he looks. So I just stopped shaving and left it to the make-up people to make sure I looked bad in every scene." — Clive Owen. [Mirror]
• "I had to be chained to the ceiling with a hood over my head, in my boxer shorts, being hosed down by a soldier, with cold air fans blowing on me. I wouldn't recommend being tortured by Samuel L Jackson. He seems to enjoy it a little too much." — Michael Sheen, who filmed Unthinkable with Jackson. [Telegraph]
• "She's so different from me. She's so focused on the outside. She just loves clothes and she just loves life, and she wants to make the world more beautiful. How often do you read a comedy script with a woman in the lead, and she's actually a flawed, deluded character? And I was able to do physical comedy. It was a dream role." — Isla Fisher on Rebecca Bloomwood, her Shopaholic character. [USA Today]
• "The people who are the most beautiful are those who do what they love to do – who have love in their lives, and laugh a lot, go to good movies, read good books, and have great sex. A guy who's a chauvinist I'm not interested in. Any good man knows women are much smarter than men." — Carla Gugino, to Women's Health. [People]
• "We very rarely talk but when we do, it sure makes me laugh. She's one of the funniest ladies I know and I hold huge amounts of love and respect for her. She's my big sister. Things were wild during the years I was with her in the band and she's one of the wildest creatures I've ever met, but I have my own personal perception of her. There's nobody else like her. I feel like there should be a review of the great stuff that Hole and Courtney put out there. I would support that because I feel it's important to pass on to women of future generations." — Melissa Auf der Maur on Courtney Love. [ONTD via Spinner]
• "When you look at someone like Jessica [Simpson], I don't know if she gained weight, but it's all I've heard about. I'm looking for someone with a great voice, but if someone is 50 pounds overweight, I have to tell them the reality - that it might hold them back." — American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi. [MSNBC]

• The fallout from Chris Brown's arrest for allegedly attacking Rihanna continued today, even as the District Attorney's office said they needed police to do more investigative work to find out what really happened.

• Chief investigator Detective Deshon Andrews hand carried case documents to the DA today because he won't allow any copies to be made to prevent photos and documents from leaking to the media. The LAPD has also denied media requests to hear the 911 call, which Andrews said is mostly of "a screaming woman." Police did not identify the woman as Rihanna, but said she "suffered visible injuries and identified Brown as her attacker." [CNN]
• Ugh, now a "highly placed source" in Chris Brown's legal camp is suggesting that Rihanna started the fight after Brown got a phone call from a woman with whom she suspects he is cheating. "She went ballistic and began to "beat the sh*t" out of Chris (while driving). She was so uncontrollable, that Chris began to fight back in self defense, which ensued the fight," said the source. [Bossip]
• But other sources say "Chris knocked her around" and that Rihanna suffered a black eye, a swollen split lip, and two red and purple contusions on either side of her forehead. An unidentified friend says Rihanna is "in a safe place" now and adds, "I would be so sad if she went back to him." [People]
• Rihanna's grandma denies that she has a broken nose, and says, "I don't want people to worry. Rihanna is fine and she is doing well." [Perez Hilton]
• T.I. says he spoke to Chris Brown and he is "cool." He added that people shouldn't be so quick to judge Brown because, "you people gotta remember, we celebrities and we entertainers but we still human. All of us. Don't expect us not to make mistakes ‘cause we will." Here we must agree with Perez Hilton, who remarked, "Since when is beating on a woman a 'mistake'?" [Perez Hilton]
• Kanye West discussed the situation on a radio show this morning and had a lot of kind things to say about Rihanna. "It's so devastating. As a person, I don't care how famous she is or if she just worked at McDonald's, that should never happen. It should never come to that place," said Kanye. [Just Jared]
• Chris Brown's "Got Milk?" ads were scheduled to end this week and the company said they will not be using him once the run ends. [Entertainment Tonight]
• A Pittsburgh radio station has decided to stop playing Chris Brown's music. Will other stations follow their example? [WPXI]
• Tameka Foster, Usher's wife, is still in a Brazilian hospital suffering from "complications from routine surgery." The hospital refused to release information on her condition, saying "the family has demanded total privacy." [Yahoo]
• The lawyers in Britney's conservatorship case got permission to withdraw more money from her accounts because she needs to hire more lawyers to defend her against Sam Lufti's defamation case. The two lawyers will cost a total of $935 an hour. [TMZ]
• This is an interesting eight minute video about Salma Hayek's humanitarian trip to Sierra Leone. But the only part anyone cares about is that she breastfeeds a sick baby that is not her own five minutes into the video. [D Listed]
• Salma Hayek says she thinks of her current boyfriend and ex-finace Francois-Henri Pinault when she is kissing Alec Baldwin on 30 Rock. Also, their baby is 16 months old and speaks English, French, and Spanish. [People]
• Simon Cowell: still a jerk. Reports that he saved Fantasia Barrino's house from foreclosure are untrue. [Showbiz Spy]
• Anne Heche will star in the new HBO series Hung as the ex-wife of the main character, Ray, a "well-endowed, struggling high school basketball coach." [UPI]
• In the next chapter of the Hillary Duff-Faye Dunaway feud, Duff says: "[Dunaway] started acting way later than I did so I think I have time to grow and grow with each project. I am learning and work hard at my craft… [What I said was mean but] it's not okay for people to take stabs at you and to say mean things for no reason." [Just Jared]
• Cybill Shepard will star in a new comedy on Lifetime called Alligator Point. Shepard will star as the owner of Mae's Oyster Bar, "a Southern-fried hangout where a group of eccentric Floridians are forced to befriend a Yankee." And it gets weirder: the pilot was directed by Kelsey Grammar and it was originally developed as a pilot for NBC seven years ago starring Nathan Fillion and Jaimie Pressly. [Entertainment Weekly]
• Seven of the people at the party where Michael Phleps was photographed smoking pot have been arrested, along with the owner of the house who did not attend the party. Police have also confiscated the bong, which the owner was trying to sell on eBay for $100,000. [WIS10]
• Though Justin Timberlake developed the concept for the NYC BBQ and ribs restaurant Southern Hospitality, that's where his involvement ends. He's still friends with the owner and eats at the restaurant, but is not an investor or partner in the business. [People]
• DMX is in solitary confinement for 23 hours in an Arizona jail because he refused to report for his mandatory job, did not show up to receive his medication and then demanded it an hour later. [Perez Hilton]
• A source says John Mayer wrote Jennifer Aniston a special song for her 40th birthday tomorrow. Is this the same song we learned about earlier, which is based on something dumb Jen told him about love? [People]
• Queen Latifah will sing the song "I'll Be Seeing You" during the In Memoriam montage at the Oscars this year. [The Mirror]
• According to the father of another Russian tennis player, Maria Sharapova isn't absent from professional tennis because of an injury, but because she is concentrating on a love affair. [The Daily Express]
• Patrick Swayze has written a letter to legislators urging them to increase funding to the National Institute of Health for the fight against cancer. [E!]
• Hit hard by the recession: Paris Hilton. The company that holds the licenses for all of her products reported dismal 4th quarter earnings. [Fashion Rules]
• The Jonas Brother say that Sasha and Malia Obama were "so grateful, so nice, so composed and so awesome," when they met them on the night of the Inauguration. They performed "Love Bug" and "SOS" for the girls and gave them guitars. [Access Hollywood]
• Lauren Conrad is renting the four bedroom house where The Hills was filmed, for $11,000 a month. It even includes a guest house for roommates you want to shun. [TMZ]
• Michelle Pfeiffer, who turned 50 last year, says she is getting offered more interesting roles now, and that "It seems my leading men keep getting younger the older I get." She explains, "It seems people have an aversion about casting me with men my age. Lucky for me; I don't really mind." [Yahoo]
• Ashton Kutcher edited a video on his Twitter page to make it look like the paparazzi were harassing him at LAX, but a TMZ video shows there were only three photographers there and they were friendly. [TMZ]
• KISS singer Paul Stanley and his wife Erin welcomed their second child, a baby girl named Sarah, on January 28. "Erin and I feel truly blessed with the addition of this Star Child into our lives," said Stanley. [People]
• In a poll of 2,000 people to determine the 20 most timeless film beauties, Audrey Hepburn finished first, beating out Angelina Jolie. [The Telegraph]
• Vincent Pastore, a.k.a. "Big Pussy" on The Sopranos, has settled a lawsuit with his ex-fiance for $150,000. His ex, Lisa Regina, was suing him because she claimed he roughed her up after a fight in her car. [NY Post]
• Scarlett Johansson says she wasn't trying to copy Marilyn Monroe in her recent Dolce & Gabanna ad campaign. "I am a curvy woman who is blonde, and perhaps we are both comfortable in our femininity, but I think that is as far as the comparison goes," says Johansson. So that makes Johansson just about the only starlet who doesn't want to be compared to Marilyn. [The Daily Express]

• Last night TMZ reported that Lindsay & Sam broke up. [TMZ]

• E! also reported that after fighting on New Year's Eve, the couple is dunzo, quoting a source who claims that Lindsay has already moved out. [E!]
• Here's the thing: Late last night, Lindsay Lohan wrote an entry on her MySpace blog which reads: "RUMORS. little piece of TRUE information: we did NOT break up! access hollywood, extra, et, every tabloid, page six... AND every GOSSIP website. Get your stories straight please. It's really annoying to have all of your friends emailing you saying, i saw, i read, etc... NOT TRUE. :) xoxox Lindsay." [ONTD, Perez Hilton]
• Lindsay also writes: "Samantha and I have had a wonderful past few weeks and in spite of what the stories say I did have a wonderful new year." [ONTD]
• Miffed at the reports that Scientology might have been responsible for the death of Jett Travolta, Tommy Davis from Scientology International says: "Scientologists seek conventional medical treatment for medical conditions. Scientologists use prescription drugs when physically ill and also rely on the advice and treatment of medical doctors. The church does not involve itself in the diagnosis or classification of any medical condition." [MSNBC]
• John Travolta will be flying his son's body home in his own plane. [Mirror]
• Did Madonna spend New Year's in the Maldives with some hot young Brazilian model named Jesus? [Made In Brazil]
• And did Alex Rodriguez "get very close" to designer Donna Karan on New Year's eve? [Page Six]
• Check out pix of Amy Winehouse in the Caribbean with some "rugby player-turned-actor." The dude, Josh Bowman, says: "She's just a cool girl, very nice, and we're just very friendly." [Telegraph]
• Craig Ferguson's holidays included a secret wedding; Jezebel's Anna pouts, "My boyfriend got married." [People]
• Rihanna is playing Malaysia next month, which means she can't wear the skimpy little outfits she tends to sport on stage. She plans to abide by the government guidelines, which state that a female performer must be covered from the top of her chest, including her shoulders, to her knees. Disturbia! [Yahoo News]
• Holy hammer! Daniel Craig may play Thor in a film based on the Marvel comic. [Daily Express]
• Kate Hudson is on the cover of the new Elle magazine, and inside she spills: "When I was a teenager, like, when I turned 16, I loved boys. That was just my thing. I still love boys." We noticed. [Yahoo News]
• Queen Latifah has signed on for another year of promoting Jenny Craig. Her highness lost 20 pounds last year! [People]
• Kate Moss told her nanny to expect an "increased workload" in 2009. Does it mean Miss Moss is planning on getting pregnant? [This Is London]
• The Barbara Walters interview with Patrick Swayze airs tomorrow, January 7th on ABC. "You can bet that I'm going through hell," Swayze tells Baba Wawa. "And I've only seen the beginning of it." [ABC News]
• By the by, Barbara Walters says The View's ban on Kathy Griffin has been lifted! Will the D-List diva return? [Perez Hilton]
• David Beckham (and some other footballers) will be asked to speak out against homophobia in a video produced by gay rights group Outrage!. A spokesperson from the group also says the piece could encourage gay players to come out. This is a good time to point out that there was once a gay soccer movie called Guys & Balls. No, really. [Independent]
• Moammar Khadafy's son Saif paid Mariah Carey a million bucks to perform at his New Year's Eve party on St. Bart's. Dirty, sexy money! Oh, and spies say Mariah's not pregnant, since she drank lots of Champagne and ate oysters. [Rush & Molloy]
• Unreleased recordings by Tupac and Snoop Dogg will be part of a Death Row records auction on January 15th. But buying the tracks could mean pissing off Suge Knight. Scary! [Rush & Molloy]
• Jamie Foxx and Joaquin Phoenix were seen partying in Miami Beach, on the stage in a club, dancing around and acting like clowns as Casey Affleck filmed them. A witness claims: "They said they were making a documentary." Things must not have gone well, because Foxx and Phoenix came back the next night and did it again. Reshoot! [Gatecrasher]
• Does Jeremy Piven have a hairpiece? (We've often marveled at the weirdness of his tresses.) [Gatecrasher]
• Jessica Simpson is not married — or engaged — to Tony Romo, yet she has contributed recipes to the 2008 Cowboys Family Cookbook, presented by "the wives of the Dallas Cowboys." [Gatecrasher]
• Will Rod Stewart show up at the 400th anniversary of a church in Edinburgh? His son was baptized there and he vowed to return one day… [Daily Express]
• Tim Allen and his wife Jane Hajduk are expecting their first child. The only words that come to mind are "Tool Time," but that is just mean, huh? [People]
• News you can't use: Coolio had a threesome when he was 12 years old. [The Sun]
• La Toya Jackson, who, like Coolio, is a participant on Celebrity Big Brother, claims that The Jackson 5, will, indeed, reunite. Of course, she was never in The Jackson 5, and seems a wee bit loony tunes, but whatevs. [The Sun]
• Kate "Jordan" Price was banned by Facebook after her personal page exceeded the friend limit. Raise your hand if you do not get her appeal. [The Sun]
• Paris Hilton speaks: "I’d like three or four children. I want a boy first, to watch over my girls, and I’ll name my first girl London – I love that name." Oh! And UK residents, be forewarned! The heiress also says: "I would like to move [to London] one day and raise my kids in the UK so that they have British accents and manners." [The Sun]
• Kathy Bates regrets not going public with her battle with ovarian cancer: "I think it may have helped more people because it's such a difficult disease to diagnose early; I was very, very lucky." [Daily Express]
• Pictures of Zhang Ziyi half-naked on a beach have stirred up new controversy for the already controversial actress. [Time, Zona Europa, China Smack]
• Roman Polanski's lawyers have asked that his case be moved from the L.A. Justice system. [NY Times]
• Actor Rip Torn has pleaded guilty to drunk driving charges after being caught motoring in the breakdown lane with a Christmas tree tied to the top of his car on December 14. Too much egg nog? [AP]
• Back in 1965, The Beatles received MBEs (Members of the British Empire). John Lennon sent his back to the Queen in 1969 as part of a peace protest. It was recently found in a vault after not being seen in decades. [Times of London]
• “I’ve been on so many bad dates. I went on one where I just left because he was so boring. I felt really bad, and I didn’t want him to pay for dinner. It’s like, ‘It’s really nice to meet you’ – moving on! Then you call your friend and you’re like, ‘Really? Really? Is that who you think I would have a great night with?!’” — Kate Hudson. [MSNBC]
• "[I'm] not rich rich. Rich is Spielberg. Lucas. Gates. Steve Jobs. Jay-Z! Bruce Springsteen. I'm not complaining. But that's money. Will Smith. Oprah Winfrey - that's a ton of money. Compared to them, I'm on welfare!" — Spike Lee. [Page Six]

• Very-pregnant Jennifer Garner and hubby Ben Affleck have been "spotted" entering Cedars-Sinai hospital: please let them dress the baby in a little top hat and "2009" banner! [TMZ]

• Turks and Caicos police have dropped all charges against both Hairspray kinda-star Nikki Blonsky and would-be Top Model Bianca Golden following July's rather unbecoming family rumble. Blonsky's father Carl still faces assault charges. [E]
• People magazine is denying that it has bought the rights to photographs of Bristol Palin and her newborn son, Tripp. Says the magazine's editor, ""Would we pay for a picture of her and her kid? I don't know. It's something I would consider. It's not something I would rule out of hand." Translation: he's still negotiating. [Anchorage Daily News]
• Somebody really ought to tell Paul Reiser he's dead, because Wikipedia Never Lies! According to the professional nebbish's bio, "On December 27th, 2008 Reiser was discovered dead in the Squallahassee River where he reportedly enjoyed fly fishing. No foul play was suspected." These exaggerated reports have since been removed. [E]
• Neither we nor Benji Madden had heard he was dating Britney Spears. Unlike us, he presumably would care. "That one was news to me. My friend called me and asked if I was dating Britney because he read it somewhere and I was like, what?" [People]
• Speaking of Britney! Her brother Bryan is getting married tonight, to Jamie-Lynn's manager Graciella Sanchez, a woman with an unnaturally high tolerance for this family. [Perez Hilton]
• Amy Winehouse and Blake Incarcerated have a Norwegian court date set for January 12th, following last year's drugs-possession arrest. [Yahoo]
• David Beckham and his temp team, AC Milan, have been forced by "the ruler of Dubai" to cancel their New Year's Eve partying out of solidarity with the Palestinians. We're sure that went over well with a group of Italian athletes. [Mirror]
• And Becks won't even have any free Pepsi to drink! He and the soft drink have split, to everyone's satisfaction. [Reuters]
• Oddly enough, Cloris Leachman will be the grand marshal of this year's Rose Bowl Parade. She says she will not dance in the streets, will do the coin toss before the game with Penn State. [AP]
• Kevin Costner's county music career makes us sad and uncomfortable. And he clearly has no relationship with Bodyguard costar Whitney Houston. [Extra]
• Marisa Tomei's unwillingness to say Mickey Rourke was difficult to work with makes it seem like Mickey Rourke was really difficult to work with. "There were no shenanigans on the set. That's all I'll say." [Parade]
• Queen Latifah has been robbed of $10,000 worth of jewels while vacationing in Black Rock Tobago, news which Perez Hilton still manages to try to use to out her. [Perez Hilton]
• Professional charmer Simon Baker has caught Election Fever! Quoth the Antipodean smoothie, "The morning after your election in November, I said to my wife Rebecca, ‘You know, I'm thinking about becoming an American,' and then she said that she felt the same way." Yeah, when you do, say hi to all those people who "moved to Canada" after the last election. [People]
• 30 Rock sneak peeks: need we say more? Okay, then, Tracy wears a shirt made out of money. [E]
• DJ AM sets the record straight, sort of. "I want to take a second to address the hurtful posts and clear up any misunderstandings any of you may have about my law suit. I would NEVER sue the deceased pilots' estates or personal holdings. I am more than grateful that I survived this horrible accident and I'd never try to take anything from those that didn't. Despite the misinterpretations of the lawsuit, this suit is against the insurance companies that insured the pilots. I'm not after Sarah's or James' personal estates nor their property. Everyone involved in this suit has suffered a great deal, and I would not do anything to make matters worse for the deceased family and friends." It still doesn't really explain why you're suing but...carry on! [Perez Hilton]

[Images via Getty]

[Los Angeles, November 20. Image via x17]

New York, November 13. Image via x17.

• Sean Penn: Lousy gay lover! Diego Luna was asked about kissing Sean for Milk and said, "It was...dry." He added: "I guess he was thinking about Franco." But costar James Franco claims kissing Sean was "fine." Not hot, steamy, fun. Fine. [E!]
• Britney's youngest son, Jayden, has been released from the hospital. He was rushed to the emergency room on Sunday is because he had an allergic reaction to something he ate. The 2-year-old had hives, was itchy and irritable. The family is "just not sure" what triggered the reaction. [Page Six, TMZ]
• Madonna had a dinner party at her apartment and invited her non-Kabbalah friends, so they could meet her "friend" Alex Rodriguez. [Mirror]
• Madonna let Guy see his sons! There's a picture of Rocco and David at the airport, hugging Guy. Apparently Madonna has a list of demands that Guy must meet while the kids are with him in London. It includes a ban on TV, non-organic food and clothes not sent by her. For some reason, can't you picture Guy getting the kids hopped up on sugar and Disney cartoons? [Daily Mail]
• People and Us Weekly put Barack Obama on their covers, and those issues sold extremely well. America wasn't interested in Jennifer Aniston or Suri Cruise last week? Really? [MSNBC]

• Will a Barack Obama documentary sweep the Emmys? It's co-produced by Ed Norton… [LA Times]
• Malia and Sasha Obama might get to visit the set of Hannah Montana! "The invitation is there," Billy Ray Cyrus says. "The Hannah Montana film comes out in April. Maybe something might happen around then. Maybe not. I don’t know… I have got to keep a secret." Uh, too late! [Access Hollywood]
• Michelle Williams' dad, Larry Williams, a prominent stock market trader, has agreed to return to the U.S. to face tax evasion charges. He's been in Australia, though he's actually a resident of the Virgin Islands. He possibly owes $1.5 million in unpaid taxes. [Yahoo News]
• Here's a snippet from the Blake Lively interview in W magazine: "Lively doesn’t even attempt to hide her glee at all the freebies foisted upon her, from designer dresses and diamond bangles to an utterly insane number of pricey purses. 'I probably have, like, 60 gorgeous bags,' she says. 'I have a closet with my really sharp, fancy, nice ones—the ones that go with my Valentino pumps, for example. And then I have a closet with the ones that are a little more rugged-feeling, the kind that go with my Belstaff motorcycle boots.'" [W]
• Juliette Lewis met Ed Westwick and said, "Who is this guy?" Someone's not watching Gossip Girl. He's Chuck Bass! [Rush & Molloy]
• The creators of Gossip Girl say the show is like "a chess game." See, "Chuck and Blair are the king and queen. Everyone else, except Serena, is a pawn.” Hmm, isn't the show more like Trouble, what with the pop-o-matic dice and the moving in circles? Wait, what was the question again? [People]
• Amy Winehouse "lost it" after finding out Blake Fielder-Civil contacted the "other woman" when he got out of jail. Blake Formerly Incarcerated says, "She hasn’t dumped me. We both love each other and will be together for ever. We have spoken on the phone and I’m expecting a visit from her any time now. We can’t wait to be back together." Keep hope alive! [The Sun]
• When asked about the rumors linking him to Evan Rachel Wood, Mickey Rourke said, "She's a good friend, that's it. Tell that faggot who wrote all that shit in the paper I'd like to break his fucking legs." Whoops! Mickey's sorry! Rourke has released a statement which reads, "I want to sincerely apologize for the derogatory word I used. It was insensitive and inappropriate of me and I am deeply sorry that I may have offended anyone." [Yahoo News via E!]
• Nicole Kidman was on Oprah yesterday, and at O's urging, she pulled out a picture of her baby, Sunday Rose. [Perez Hilton]
• Speaking of Nicole, something is up with her new flick, Australia. The studio forced director Baz Luhrmann to change the ending, but don't click unless you want to know, this entire article is a spoiler alert. [LA Times]
• Mariah Carey's demands for the World Music Awards: A £100,000 private jet transport to the ceremony in Monte Carlo and a £10,000-a-night penthouse suite at the exclusive Hotel de Paris for two nights. Plus! VIP treatment for her 15-member entourage. [Daily Mail]
• Mariah was on Simon Cowell's X Factor over the weekend, and some people are saying it was one of her worst performances ever. Click for video and judge for yourself. (My 2¢: Her voice is not what it used to be.) [The.Life Files]
• Blind item! "Which proud new papa isn't much of a family guy? The handsome actor, notorious for having a roving eye, was spotted leaving a downtown hot spot with the beautiful bartender." [Rush & Molloy]
• Evan Rachel Wood claims the Obama camp wanted Marilyn Manson to play for Barack. A spokesperson says, "That it not true." [Yahoo News]
• Isaiah Washington is speaking out about Brooke Smith being fired from Grey's Anatomy: "I looked at a brilliant actress, whom I have adored since I first saw her in Silence of the Lambs. For her to be treated this way, I find very interesting. The fact is that, just before the holidays, you have a mother, a wonderful actress removed from a steady income without the proper reasoning behind it…You look at the way another consummate professional [is] being treated because her character, her story line [has] potentially made producers uncomfortable. Now that I see what they're doing to a show that I love and I care about, I think it's disgusting. The fact that Shonda has been put in this position is extremely unfair. It's unfortunate because it was probably, at the time, the most progressive show on television. Now I see it [being] systematically torn apart. Bring Burke back!" Yeah, that's right, Burke. Not Brooke. He's talking about himself, you see. [Perez Hilton
• Oh dear: Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt will guest star on How I Met Your Mother. Well, at least Heidi's psuedo-employed after losing her fake job. [E!, People]
• America Ferrera will star and executive produce a drama called American Tragic, about a young war vet who sets off across the country with a buddy to find redemption. Ferrera will play his wife. [Variety]
• Queen Latifah will host the People's Choice Awards on January 7. [Variety]
• Are Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel getting married or not? (Seems like "not.") [MSNBC]
• Tim Robbins is still battling the New York City board of elections. Did he show up to the wrong polling place? Or did they change his location without him knowing? [Page Six, NY Times]
• Regis Philbin gave his old elementary school $1.5 million in 2005; it's since been shut down. Think he wishes he had the cash back? [Page Six]
• Will Eminem's new CD come out on time? There was a December due date, but a source says, "He is being a perfectionist and is completely obsessive-compulsive about this album. There's a 50-50 chance it will be done by the end of this year - but most likely it'll be the first quarter of next year." After this long, why rush? [Page Six]
• NBC's Medium returns in January with new castmember Tracy Pollan, aka Mrs. Michael J. Fox. [EW]
• In Roger Moore's memoir, you learn that that during the filming of Live and Let Die, his first Bond flick, he had kidney stones, so he took a painkiller, methylene, that both knocked him out and turned his urine blue. He woke up in the middle of the night, mistook his closet for a bathroom and peed all over his clothes, "dying them a delightful azure." [Time]
• Kelsey Grammer on Sarah Palin: "I don't know that she doesn't know that Africa is a continent… And if I read it in the New York Times, I have to get a second source." Damn librul media! [TMZ]
• The Dallas reunion was a Texas-sized mess! Hundreds more people than expected showed up for Saturday night's barbecue and cast reunion at Southfork Ranch; angry fans complained they didn't get the access to cast members they'd paid $500 to see; while others got close to the stars without paying. [Yahoo News]
• By the by, Mayim Bialik, the star of '90s sit com Blossom, had a baby about a month or two ago. Her second child, a boy named Fred. [TMZ]
• Former boy band mogul, Lou Perlman, is discussed in a new book, and the consensus is the dude is "creepy" and tried to "wrestle" with the boys he managed. Perlman's currently serving a 25-year jail sentence for conspiracy, money laundering, etc. [Rush & Molloy]
• Actress Gong Li: Being called a traitor, because she's decided to become a Singaporean citizen. (She was born and raised in China.) [Breitbart]
• Tony Dow, who played Wally on Leave It To Beaver, will have one of his abstract sculptures on display at the Louvre. Upgrade! [Yahoo News]
• Headline of the day: "Fleetwood Mac's Lindsey Buckingham wants to play a song for President George W Bush called 'Treason.'" [Telegraph]
• WTF. Another William Shatner video, in which he talks shit about George Takei. [Perez Hilton]
• James Cromwell, who starred in the Babe movies, is recovering from a broken collarbone and partially deflated lung after falling off of his bicycle in an L.A.-area canyon on Sunday. He should be out of the hospital now. That'll do! [AP]
• Geri Halliwell has dumped her "toyboy" lover, dancer Ivan "Flipz" Velez. He's devastated. Maybe his new middle name will be "Mopez." [Mirror]
• Here's a rare photograph of Marilyn Monroe in stockings and garters. [Telegraph]
• Chris March of Project Runway was interviewed by a snarky New York magazine editor and wasn't really amused. The writer was mocking Seal's facial scars, though, so: Team March. [NY Mag]
• Beyoncé says offers have come in from magazines wanting wedding pictures and it's "crazy money that's just ridiculous." Don't worry, B is classier than that: "It's so not worth it. If anything, if you wanna put something out, then put it out, not for (money). We worked really hard at keeping it private. I've always been this way, and he's always been this way, so that's why we complement each other. We always knew that it would be private and quiet, for all the right reasons." [AP]
• Here's a lovely poem Chuck Norris has written about Barack Obama's "political stink." It rhymes! [E&P Pub]
• "He’s never let himself become a lost cause. He’s hardcore and very strong. Off-duty he flies his own plane and helicopter and he insists on doing as many of his own stunts as possible. It’s him riding the bikes and throwing the punches — he doesn’t palm it off to a stunt man." — Jamie Milnes, Harrison Ford's personal trainer, on working with him for Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull. [Telegraph]
• "I thought it would be easy to cast a Bond girl, because there are so many beautiful women in this world. But not many of them can act. Their acting needed to be really strong and three-dimensional. Historically, the role of women in the world has changed. You can't have someone in a Bond film just as a sex object. [But] they have to be sexy and beautiful. That's what people expect, and that's what Bond is about." — Quantum Of Solace director Marc Forster. [Esquire]
• "I call her 'The Mouse.' And The Mouse holds on to the edge of a chair now and is gaining the confidence to think, 'Maybe these legs belong to me.' I keep telling Nicole that it's a bad sign, because once those legs gain confidence, then they're out of here!" — Lionel Richie on 10-month-old granddaughter Harlow. [People]
• "She taught me the importance of looking good and feeling good but also that beauty comes from within, because it fades. I looked at her like a therapist and a makeover queen –- the perfect glamorous smart woman. People would walk in, talk to her and tell her their issues and they'd walk out feeling and looking like a new woman." — Beyoncé, on her mother, who owned a hair salon when B was a kid. [People]
• "It's cool when you have a movie where you can show another side of yourself, like this one does. The movie is not going to be successful, I don't think. It's not the usual Van Damme action movie, so I'm not really kicking butt. People who know me, they know my story, that I came with nothing and because famous with martial arts. I did the movie because it felt good to do something like that. [I won't do a reality show because] I don't want to expose my family or even my animals to the cameras all the time. You can't even go to the toilet because they shove a camera up your butt. I would probably throw the camera out the window. They did approach me once, though — the channel with the guy with the long hair. Gene Simmons? [Checks with son.] No, it was Ozzy Osbourne, who's a big teddy bear. A letter came to my desk and he wanted to know if I'd do a reality show. Bad or good, only God should know what you're doing at all times." — Jean-Claude Van Damme. [WSJ]
• "It was OK. I wasn’t into the waif thing. She kind of looked like my nephew. I mean she’s beautiful – she’s a very pretty nephew – but I’m more into curvy women." — Mark Wahlberg on posing with Kate Moss in those 1992 Calvin Klein ads. [The Sun]
• "I'm running a business. And sometimes being the boss of your own empire and creation, you have to be assertive. Being a female, that comes with being labeled a 'bitch' and given titles that men wouldn’t receive. But if that’s what I’m going to be called by being assertive and knowing who I am and what I want out of life, so be it. I wear that label proudly." — Christina Aguilera in Rolling Stone. [MSNBC]
• "I apparently offended some animal lovers. Um, really people? I love animals as much as anyone, I don't eat pork – so for those of you fighting that good fight against me ... shut up! I was just pointing out the fact that people in California seem to care more about animal rights than human rights … I'm not running around killing chickens for fun or firing a slingshot at a squirrel." — Samantha Ronson, resonding to people who were offended by her Prop 2 vs. Prop 8 post. [People]
• "[I said] 'Sen. Obama, when you were in school in Boston, did you encounter any racism?' And he said something really interesting. He said, um. He said, 'I'm Kanye West.'" — Sarah Silverman. [Page Six]