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Rom-Nom
1980s Romance Novels: Hair-Raising, Lip-Mashing Horror Shows
New York, 10:30 PM
Thu Nov 12
73 posts in the last 24 hours
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1980s Romance Novels: Hair-Raising, Lip-Mashing Horror Shows |
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06/15/09
06/15/09
However, one can be too subtle. My book club read "Tender is the Night" and we all agreed we nearly missed it when Dick and Rosemary had sex. It was like an old movie that pans away after the characters first kiss, and pans back to them fully clothed and smoking.
06/15/09
I am the all-time champion of this game.
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Some of her books lately are sort of magical and time-travel-y, which I'm not into, but she has pretty much mastered the "semi-interesting characters meet cute, overcome personal obstacles, bone, and get together in 2-3 reading hours" thing.
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06/15/09
There were no survivors.
On topic, I've read PLENTY of awesome books with no sex. But I've also read plenty of awesomely wickedly dirty ones.
Yet, I've never read the ones with those "WARNING: THIS IS A HOT BOOK" labels on them. Mayhaps I should give one a whirl...
06/15/09
Cupcakes make everything lovely.
06/15/09
Why must books have sex scenes now? Do we HAVE to sexualize everything? Like movies, are books boring now if they don't have sex and violence?
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[www.literaryreview.co.uk]
Here's one runner-up, from Black Swan Green by David Mitchell:
If Dawn Madden's breasts were a pair of Danishes, Debby Crombie's got two Space Hoppers. Each armed with a gribbly nipple. Tom Yew kissed them in turn and his saliva glistened in the April sun. I know watching was wrong but I couldn't not. Tom Yew slipped off her red panties and stroked the cressy hair there.
'If you want me to stop, Madam Crombie, you have to say now.'
'Oooh, Master Yew,' she croodled, 'don't you dare.'
Tom Yew got on her and sort of jiggled there and she gasped like he was giving her a Chinese burn and wrapped her legs round him, froggily. Now he moved up and down, Man-from-Atlantisly. His silver chain jiggled on his neck.
Now her grubby soles met like they were praying.
Now his skin was glazed in roast pork sweat.
Now she made a noise like a tortured Moomintroll.
Now Tom Yew's body jerkjerked judderily jackknifed and a noise like a ripping cable tore out of him. Once more, like he'd been booted in the balls.
Her fingernails'd sunk salmony welts into his arse.
Debby Crombie's mouth made a perfect O.
Gribbly nipple! SO AMAZINGLY WONDERFULLY TERRIBLE, I MAY JUST DIE OF HAPPINESS.
06/15/09
This was awesome. It made my day.
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06/15/09
I don't know what a tortured Moomintroll sounds like, though. You're on your own for that one. ;-)
06/15/09
I think I determined what all the bad ones had in common though: an attempt to be overly poetic. Also, the women came awfully fast in all of them.
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@Bryn: I read romances from time to time (I am a relentless reader and fear being alone with my own thoughts which = will read anything) and I know that a lot of the sex scenes are pretty graphic. Not trying to put them down, I just giggle at sex scenes period. Even Updike sounds cheese-tastic to me.
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