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Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
How Many Professors Do You Actually Still Think About?

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Norton
09/22/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
I kind of love that he compared himself to Casaubon, the likely-impotent, pathetic first husband whose "great" work will never be finished because it's just stupid.
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Plum-Pie promoted this comment Norton was starred Norton was unstarred

Pizza!Pizza!Pizza!
09/22/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
There's nothing like looking back at teachers you thought were hot while in school and gagging a little. In retrospect, it often becomes clear that it was a case of stress, lack of sleep and boredom with all the boys you know.
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SukritiLibizzle
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
I just want to point out that as much as the stereotype is the reverse, in actual fact student-faculty relationships are overwhelmingly more likely to involve a female professor and a male student. Call it a double standard if you want, but attractive, intelligent men in their thirties can easily pull females in their late teens or early twenties if they show a modicum of effort, without having to break standards of professional conduct.

A intelligent woman in her thirties, on the other hand, has two choices: either date a man in his forties, or she can have casual/short term relationships with "cougar cubs" or "milf hunters", neither of which group is really going to be up for stimulating conversation before or after.

On a university campus, however, there are a lot of young men you are handsome, smart, and mature, and looking for similar partners. Throw in the disaster that is college interpersonal relationships, and you have all the required elements for a professor/student relationship.

I've know of three confirmed student-faculty relationships with female professors. I don't know of any of the opposite kind, apart from the general reputation of Swarthmore College in Pennsylvania.
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clevernamehere
09/22/09

@SukritiLibizzle: "attractive, intelligent men in their thirties can easily pull females in their late teens or early twenties if they show a modicum of effort"

A guy in his 30s canm easily date teenagers? What porno are you living in.
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theKP
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
Can I add my voice to the professors who are disgusted, nay, totally sicked out by this guy? This asshole just advocated that male professors abuse their power, with that old bullshit caveat that really, "she wants it." Dude, I think you took the wrong message away from Lolita. We're supposed to come away disturbed by Humbert, not idolizing him and thinking about how awesome it would be to enjoy our very own young woman.

Do students sometimes have crushes on teachers? Sure. It can be part of the erotics of power dynamics, and really, the professor is just standing in for the knowledge that the student desires. Do some very young daughters sometimes want to marry their fathers? Sure, but that doesn't mean the father should take that as permission to sexually abuse her. Grow up and be an adult, you jackass.
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alibabathieves
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
so many things wrong with this its impossible to even start. other commenters have done a nice job, though. i have to add, however -- what of Female professors??! i like how he just skips over the fact that women are (gasp) professors and they have male students!! ug.
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Rooo sez BISH PLZ
09/21/09

@alibabathieves: Thank you -- I was wondering if someone would bring this up. I suspect the concept of a female prof is quite beyond the reach of this particular skeeze's tiny brain, though.
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EricaLikeAmerica
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
When I was an undergrad, I was sexually harassed and stalked by a professor of the Kealy school of thought. He openly expressed scorn for the "power imbalance" argument used by "hysterical feminists" to keep professors and students from just "being friends." His extremely oblique sexual interest was never anything that I, a young and trusting 20 year old, could interpret as sexual. When I confronted him years later, he said he SHOULD HAVE forced a sexual relationship with me. Like, he should have raped me? I'm currently in grad school after suffering a couple of breakdowns regarding my career (he said I should be in academia) and my intelligence and everything else related to my self-worth. fFor ten years I couldn't even really set foot on a college campus. Now thanks to this jerk, I have PTSD and am barely scraping through grad school. The time my university allows to file sexual harassment complaints? 90 days. Institutions are complicit in this problem by providing professors with a steady supply of "voluptuous" students and by providing students with almost NO tools for dealing with unwanted attention and abuses of power. I hope this Kealey piece galvanizes colleges and universities to DO something about these career perverts.
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clevernamehere
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
Is having a crush on a professor really that common? I can't think of two girls I knew who had any interest in a prof. One girl (20) was dating a prof (40), but the relationship was widely thought of as kind of gross. The second was an older undergrad (25ish) who wanted to date her young prof (33) but he was too worried about his job. I did have a crush on a TA, but he was all of 26 when I was 21 and had very little power.

I'm really tired of this myth that all young women are totally mad about older, paunchy men because they think they are powerful. Sure, we can all think of cases where it happened, but it is unusual in my experience. Buying into the myth really messes with gender relations, men pretend they just have to wait the the right 19 year old and even young women think they are losing value every day, even though most people date in their age range.
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bookling
09/21/09

@clevernamehere: I totally have a crush on one of my professors, but it's really only because he's a total nerd. Like, I want to hang out with him and just geek out over comics and Star Wars and shit, because he's so smart and interested in the same stuff I am.
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Cimorene
09/21/09

@clevernamehere: I knew tons of women who had crushes on their professors. I did. But "crushes" on professors are of a specific type--I remember one prof talking in class about how he and his wife got into an argument over who could name all 9 Greek muses. All the girls swooned. Was it because he was so super sexy? No. His power? No. It was because he was smart and nice and didn't treat us all like conquests, unlike most of the guys I encountered. He was totally asexual with his student--a welcome change from the guys at frat parties who won't stop staring at your tits. And he loved his very smart wife. At a school full of very smart, very nerdy, socially awkward women (woo hoo women's colleges!), the idea that a man could find intelligence more important than boobies was appealing. Hence, crushes.
Not unlike the crush I had on Disney's Robin Hood I had when I was 5.
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clevernamehere
09/21/09

@Cimorene: See, I don't count that as a crush and I don't think the author does either. I've had profs I admired and profs who had relationships I'd like the emulate, but I wasn't interested in dating them.
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Cimorene
09/21/09

@clevernamehere: Well, this guy seems to think that female students who ask for help on their papers are throwing themselves at him, so his definition of "student crush" is a bit skewed. My point was that these were more than just admiration, they were definitely crushes. There was attraction, but it existed only in fantasy land. Like my crush on Robin Hood, in which I definitely wanted to marry him (a lot). But I also knew (kind of) that marrying a cartoon was impractical and impossible, and marrying a fox would be unhealthy, and also he was already in a relationship with Maid Marion, who seemed nice. So I only wanted to marry him in theory, not in reality. Like the way people wanted to marry/fuck their professors--in theory. But all the professors who ever made overtures to their students were immediately considered creepy, because what was attractive about professors was their untouchability. Like movie stars or something.
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rah29
09/22/09

@Cimorene: Probably too late for this to be read due to the time diff, but that's just what I would have said (obviously, since we have the same alma mater!). We joked about having crushes on professors all the time, but I think I would have been devastated if any of my crush objects had indicated even the slightest sexual interest in me. I had the odd crush precisely because these profs were dorky and intellectual and not like asshole frat boys (tbh, I'm straight, and my major crushes on some lady profs were essentially the same thing). It would have undermined the very reason I crushed on them.
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SaturdaysChild
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
Can I just say how sick I am of older men chasing younger women and somehow justifying this with a "well, she's got all the power REALLY" mentality? I mean, I'm not against May-December relationships per se, but I'm really sick of the older dudes claiming that because a woman is young and hot, she's infinitely more powerful and they just simply can't resist. And sometimes it seems like the men are actually angry about the fact that these women are so irresistable to them.

Yeah, dude, you've lived a lot longer and have a lot more experience, but it's definitely this young woman's fault that you're unable to keep it in your pants. Jeez.
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bookling
09/21/09

@SaturdaysChild: It's the Lolita argument. "Oh, she's the one who started it, and I am helpless to resist because she's just so lovely." Yeah, okay there, Humbert.
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HighSchoolFearleader
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
I think this is why I would feel weird going to a male professor after class to ask for help. It's not always the start of a college-themed porno, sometimes you really do need help with your paper.
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clevernamehere
09/21/09

@HighSchoolFearleader: I never thought twice about it. Only a complete loon would think you were trying to get with him.
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rah29
09/21/09

@HighSchoolFearleader: Please please don't feel weird! This guy is a total skeezebag. If you need help, don't hesitate to go to a prof's office hours. I never would have got through half my college classes without asking for a bit of help.
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pmarble
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
Oh my God. This picture of Dr. Kealey speaks a thousand nerdy words: [www.buckingham.ac.uk]
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LadyFabulous promoted this comment Edited by pmarble at 09/21/09 4:01 PM pmarble was starred pmarble was unstarred

LadyFabulous
09/21/09

@pmarble: I'm thisclose to making that my profile picture.
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CollegeCamel
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
I think in a way the students do have the power. After all, if it comes to light, the professor can get into a SHITLOAD of trouble, compromising their careers, while the student can just keep on living like nothing happened.
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MissMollyKate
09/21/09

@CollegeCamel: Not necessarily. I know of at least two instances at my university where female students complained of advances made on them by their male professors, and if anything, the professors just got cursory slaps on the wrists.
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Cerridwen
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
As an undergrad, I did a Directed Studies course with a faculty member as part of my graduating thesis. This involved a lot of one-on-one office time with my young-ish male adviser, bashing Murray Bookshin and drinking tea. And there was nothing sexual about it. I was an Honours student who relished the opportunity to learn one-on-one with someone who was an expert in the field I was studying. It was awesome but it was also professional and entirely intellectual. Seriously, get over yourself, Keane. Not everyone who asks for advice on her essay wants to bone you.
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theonlybirdleftintheaviary
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
This completely grosses me out.

It also reminds me of a story an old friend told me about her college PSYCHOLOGY professor (which also grosses me out). She was having difficulty paying for school and it came up in an after-class conversation with her Prof. to which he responded, "Well, you could always be a stripper." She admitted that she had considered it, and asked him for his honest opinion. (I know, I know this conversation was doomed before it began...but bear with me.) He said he thought it was "no big deal" and she should.

Fine. Whatever. But, what does the slimeball do afterward? He shows up with his buddies at the club she was working at - for his bachelor party- and asked for a free lap dance.

At least they didn't have sex. Kealey would have been pleased. Ugh. The vomit is burning my throat.
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boxspelunker promoted this comment Edited by theonlybirdleftintheaviary at 09/21/09 3:55 PM

theonlybirdleftintheaviary
09/21/09

As an upside: she stopped stripping shortly after that incident, now has her Master's/MFT in Psych, and started a support group for women who want to leave the sex-industry. So, sick story aside, there was a favorable outcome.
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Zombie Ms. Skittles
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
Seriously, though? This is why I never actually ask for help outside of class. I'm too skeeved out by the idea of a prof coming onto me.
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paradisefound25
09/21/09

In reply to Skeezy Prof Says Hot Students Are "A Perk"
I'm okay with this, I think. To be fair, I definitely chased after one of the hot single young professors as an undergrad. And while he never, ever evinced the slightest interest in me sexually, I am a smarter person today because of all the time I spent thinking of intelligent things to say to him. Hell, I'm taking grad school classes at night because of all the things I learned from him, and because while the attraction eventually wore off, the passion for the subject that I got from him never did.

Today, I'm still in touch with him as a friend, and he's married and about to publish an earth-shattering book. I owe him alot, and quite frankly, I HOPE he was flattered by my attention at the time, because otherwise the man would have had to of been a saint to put up with sheer amount of his office hours that I monopolized.
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Anna N. promoted this comment paradisefound25 was starred paradisefound25 was unstarred

Anna N.
09/21/09

@paradisefound25: As someone said below, there's a difference between having a crush and writing a misogynist article about the supposed prevalence of said crushes, with Tom Wolfe as your sociological source.
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clevernamehere
09/21/09

@paradisefound25: But I think this is pretty unusual. It might be more common if hot, young professors were more common but the youngest professors are usually about 30 with the bulk in their late 40s and 50s. Most 19 year olds aren't hot for men their dad's age.
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