I always touch my hair/fix my lips and stuff when I'm high and around other people. It's kind of a fidgety thing I have. I can't imagine how much I'd be doing it if there were a camera on me (which at this time is the equivalent of almost 8,000 people having looked at me).
It might not be herpes. But for sure go to that doc and have it looked at. It could be an infected skin cell thing. That usually clears up with an antibiotic.
Seriously, two questions in a row that could have (but were not) been submitted by me. Freeeeaky.
(1) The guy I'm seeing can't come during vaginal sex. We'll fool around for awhile and then he jerks off and it takes him forever. He claims it's because his penis is larger than most (whatever) but I'm getting a little frustrated by it. Not a deal breaker, not yet, but it's nice to know other people go through it too.
(2) Sometimes a pimple is just a pimple, and not herpes. Been there, obsessed about it, popped it (overshare, I know), and moved on.
@smopenna: That is too funny about the guy claiming that it's because his penis is larger than most. I think I have known guys to say similar things, and I wanted to say to them, "dude, I've totally had bigger. It isn't the size of your dick, it's just you."
A note on Blowjobs and Cumming- I too could not cum from a blowjob for a long time, just like Rich, and recently have had some dynamite blowjobs that fixed this problem. The key is proper eye, hand, and mouth coordination, and a firm eye-to-eye stare.
Also, on the "my man cannot cum" note in general- as a recreational user of opiates I have made many women feel insecure when they could not finish the job. I didn't mind not cumming, but they certainly did. Normally I would tire them out before they could do whatever it would have taken to get me off. I'll stop now before I get too graphic.
@LeeroySpitzer: No no. please go on. My bf couldn't come last night...and I THINK it was from fatigue...but I couldn't help but wonder if it was my fault and that I just wasn't turning him on? EEEEEEK I know i know...
He completely erased this fear with sex twice the next morning...but still...it was a bit of a shocker for me.
@Texpat: 'I couldn't help but wonder if it was my fault and that I just wasn't turning him on?'
Just picture that sentence in Cosmo. No one's sex life or performance (horrible term, I think, unless you're a porn star) is anyone else's 'fault.' You can be thankful... but as soon as anyone starts blaming someone else or themselves for bad sex, they need to rethink having sex at all.
If guys lay awake at night fretting their inability to make their partners cum (and remember, 80-plus percent of women don't cum through vaginal intercourse), they'd be having a lot of sleepless nights.
Guys sometimes take a long time / don't come too... For reasons that are not a partner's fault at all. Men may be relatively simple creatures in bed, but our wires get crossed sometimes too.
A few common causes:
+ medication
+ alcohol / drugs (or a lack of alcohol / drugs)
+ fatigue
+ general anxiety - preoccupied /stressed by something other than sex itself.
+ "performance anxiety"
+ "diff'rent strokes" - just not into the particular thing that's going on, but can't vocalize it (ie - what was mentioned about oral)
+ intimacy - Some guys actually don't do hook-ups and need to feel there's more going on than sex.
Some guys find it pretty embarrassing, others just chalk it up to chance and hope for better next time. Either way, talking about it helps. Also, relax and try to have fun.
Um, okay, when I'm baked I tend to worry about my looks ALL THE TIME. I'm constantly messing with my hair, my makeup, whatever. So it's not shallow, it might be just a stoned tic.
@vanka-vstanka: Oh, but it's so easy! They have some weird little sex-slang too, I read all about it in this issue of French ELLE. One good phrase is "Fais-moi grimper aux rideaux" which means "Make me climb the curtain" and I don't really know what it means, but it's hot.
@envirodesigner: I had something like what's described in that question one time (at first it just looked like an ingrown hair irritation, then it got big and hard and ouchy) and it was just a really, really angry hair follicle that had gotten infected after I shaved. Popped it like a zit, it was sore for a day or two and went away forever after that.
I know it wasn't an STD, I've had a full battery since then. So, it can happen, but the person asking should probably still see a doc! I just about had a heart attack when I felt it down there.
@pssshwhatever: Yeah, I had one too, it just popped like a giant zit. Hurt like hell to sit on not because it was a sore, but because it had so much pressure in there.
@marlo: Could be a Bartholin's cyst (sp?). I had one when I was in high school and it's when the duct at the opening of the vagina gets clogged and it blows up like a pimple. I pressed hot, wet washcloths on it and it exploded. If you wait too long, they get really big and a gyno has to lance them (this is info from my gyno at the time) and I hear that hurts like hell.
@squeakel: I did this with dental floss for my boyfriend. I wouldn't recommend it on the vadge because it swelled up and turned black and smelly before it fell off. Yuk.
@diplomacyisdead: Not really. That said, the ones I've snipped have been pretty small. Maybe the size of the little ball on the top of a straight pin. I removed one on my cousin with waxed dental floss (don't try unwaxed - it does not work!). I usually dab a bit of alcohol or hydrogen peroxide on after and it's over. PM me if you want more details!
Oh my god, Rich. Your vagina explanation.. classic.
And hahahaha, MOLE HOLE/HOLE MOLE. LOVE you guys.
"Seriously, go find someone else to get mad at." "Yeah, go rape yourself." Wow. You two put things way better than I ever could. Everyone bitching about your answers not being "PC" or whatthefuckever should probably not be hanging around *POT* Psychology.
And she's not SHALLOW, she's high, asshole. People become super fixated on certain things when they're high. At least every one I know who gets high does.
STFU, asshat trying to call Tracie out. Do you write in to pot psych to try and make people feel bad about themselves? Cause if you do, it makes you look pretty douchey.
06/20/09
06/19/09
06/19/09
(1) The guy I'm seeing can't come during vaginal sex. We'll fool around for awhile and then he jerks off and it takes him forever. He claims it's because his penis is larger than most (whatever) but I'm getting a little frustrated by it. Not a deal breaker, not yet, but it's nice to know other people go through it too.
(2) Sometimes a pimple is just a pimple, and not herpes. Been there, obsessed about it, popped it (overshare, I know), and moved on.
06/19/09
06/19/09
Also, on the "my man cannot cum" note in general- as a recreational user of opiates I have made many women feel insecure when they could not finish the job. I didn't mind not cumming, but they certainly did. Normally I would tire them out before they could do whatever it would have taken to get me off. I'll stop now before I get too graphic.
06/20/09
He completely erased this fear with sex twice the next morning...but still...it was a bit of a shocker for me.
Ugh...I'm still learning.....
06/21/09
Just picture that sentence in Cosmo. No one's sex life or performance (horrible term, I think, unless you're a porn star) is anyone else's 'fault.' You can be thankful... but as soon as anyone starts blaming someone else or themselves for bad sex, they need to rethink having sex at all.
If guys lay awake at night fretting their inability to make their partners cum (and remember, 80-plus percent of women don't cum through vaginal intercourse), they'd be having a lot of sleepless nights.
06/19/09
06/19/09
A few common causes:
+ medication
+ alcohol / drugs (or a lack of alcohol / drugs)
+ fatigue
+ general anxiety - preoccupied /stressed by something other than sex itself.
+ "performance anxiety"
+ "diff'rent strokes" - just not into the particular thing that's going on, but can't vocalize it (ie - what was mentioned about oral)
+ intimacy - Some guys actually don't do hook-ups and need to feel there's more going on than sex.
Some guys find it pretty embarrassing, others just chalk it up to chance and hope for better next time. Either way, talking about it helps. Also, relax and try to have fun.
06/19/09
A: Gay men don't feel vaginas. They feel dicks.
06/19/09
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06/20/09
One of my many talents.
06/19/09
Sorry but for the poster of the question and that of the red bumps, I'm crossing my fingers for the best
06/19/09
I know it wasn't an STD, I've had a full battery since then. So, it can happen, but the person asking should probably still see a doc! I just about had a heart attack when I felt it down there.
06/19/09
06/19/09
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06/19/09
It worked for me, but not so much for the BF who got a bleeder. Bodies. They're so gross.
06/19/09
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06/19/09
06/20/09
06/19/09
And hahahaha, MOLE HOLE/HOLE MOLE. LOVE you guys.
"Seriously, go find someone else to get mad at." "Yeah, go rape yourself." Wow. You two put things way better than I ever could. Everyone bitching about your answers not being "PC" or whatthefuckever should probably not be hanging around *POT* Psychology.
And she's not SHALLOW, she's high, asshole. People become super fixated on certain things when they're high. At least every one I know who gets high does.
06/19/09
06/19/09