• Lindsay Lohan has returned from India!

While there, she visited the Sanlaap women's and children's shelter outside Calcutta. She spent about 3 hours with people there, and watched dance performances by the children. With her was a four-person camera crew from the BBC, and, at one point, Lindsay wore a bindi. Of course. [People]

• If you have $300, you can buy a "Marc Jacob" bag from LohanHouse.com, where Lindsay and her family are selling gently used clothes, shoes, hats, bags, and "collectables." [Page Six, Lohan House]
• Chris Brown is pissed that stores are not carrying his new CD, Graffiti. He wrote on his Twitter: "im tired of this shit. major stores r blackballing my cd. not stockin the shelves and lying to costumers. what the fuck do i gotta do... WTF... yeah i said it and i aint retracting shit. im not biting my tongue about shit else... the industry can kiss my ass." He said of a Walmart in Connecticut: "They didn't even have my album in the back… not on shelves, saw for myself. the manager told me that when there are new releases its mandatory to put em on the shelves.. BUT NO SIGN OF GRAFFITI." [MSNBC Scoop, Twitter, Page Six, Gatecrasher]
• Lily Allen may have smoked a cigarette during a concert last week; and if the Liverpool City Council can prove she was smoking, she and the venue could be fined. The council is asking "witnesse" to rat Lily out. [BBC News]
• Jude Law and Sienna Miller: "In love" and moving in together in the new year. As you may recall, their romance began on the set of Alfie; then Jude cheated on her with his children's nanny. Forgive but not forget? [The Sun]
• Playgirl has turned down alleged nude photos of Tiger Woods — apparently taken by Tiger himself. The magazine's spokesperson Daniel Nardicio says: "They were impossible to 100 percent verify, hence the unwillingness to go there." [People]
• Tiger Woods' wife, Elin Nordegren, is not in Sweden, despite some reports. She is in the guest house, which, while large, is not another country. [TMZ]
• Consulting firm Accenture is the first corporate sponsor to officially drop Tiger Woods. [NY Post]
• Tiger Woods' wife will reportedly dump him after Christmas and is talking to a divorce lawyer. As for Tiger, he is seeing a therapist. Allegedly. [Radar Online]
• This report claims that Elin Nordegren wants a trial separation. but that Tiger Woods wants to take a cruise on his yacht with her and convince her to stay with him and have another baby. (?1?!) [NY Post]
• Here, Cori Rist, who hooked up with Tiger Woods, is called a "spectacular escort." [Rush & Molloy]
• According to this report: Tiger Woods and Rachel Uchitel are both in Palm Beach, Florida. But he's on his yacht; she's with her family. [TMZ]
• "Tiger Woods Cheated As Dad Died. Star Bedded Jamie Jungers As Father Lay Dying In Hospital." [Radar Online]
• Gerald Posner reports that Tiger Woods had a "separate team handle his trysts," and that Rachel Uchitel could be getting $5 million to stay quiet. [The Daily Beast]
• A source says Uma Thurman's ex-fiancé was too controlling: "It seemed like he always wanted to run the show… He wanted to bring in his own chef and his own security. He'd talk about redesigning her house in the city and knocking down buildings at her place upstate." [Rush & Molloy]
• Russell Brand was seen spotted shopping for diamonds at Cartier, fueling speculation he's going to ask Katy Perry to marry him. [Daily Mail]
• Is Prince William a "shadow King"? [NY Daily News]
• Jay-Z is well-loved by his Rocawear employees, whose Christmas gift to him was a video spoof of his hit single, "Empire State of Mind." [Page Six]
• Behold: Lady Gaga and Cyndi Lauper in the 2010 MAC Viva Glam ad campaign, shot by Ellen von Unwerth. [The Life Files]
• Susan Boyle says he life hasn't changed that much: "I have everything I had before – it's just a little more interesting now." She hasn't really splurged on too much: She bought "a red couch and some cushions." And, she says: "To anyone who has a dream I say follow that dream. You are never too old. It is never too late. And dreams can become a reality." [People]
• What do we think of Carey Hart's Day-of-the-Dead-style tattoo of Pink? [The Life Files]
• Guy Ritchie is thinking of opening a branch of his London pub, the Punch Bowl, in New York. [Daily Express]
• Sad face: Grizz from 30 Rock is suffering from severe hypertension and has to be on a dialysis machine three times a week. He's on the waiting list for a kidney transplant, but need to lose 75 pounds before he's considered a viable candidate. And the wait is 5 years. He talks about all this on Dr. Oz's show on Tuesday. [NY Daily News]
• The Los Angeles Film Critics Association and the Boston Society of Film Critics agree: Mo'Nique's performance in Precious and Kathryn Bigelow's The Hurt Locker were some of the best moments in film this year. [People]
• Lots of Kerry Washington's favorite places in New York are food-related. [NY Post]
• Candy Spelling, a panelist on E!'s new series, Bank of Hollywood — produced by Ryan Seacrest — says: "I don't have to work. I'm not putting up my own money! We all contributed our salaries, but I wasn't going to pay [the contestants] to be on TV… I love giving of my time and money — I'm very charitable and sit on three nonprofit boards and two city boards as commissioner — but… then I would just be donating money and leaving it up to the contestants as to how it's spent. We all felt a strong responsibility about how they would spend the money." Yeah, I don't know either, but it sounds snotty. [NY Post]
• Sarah Ferguson, ex-Duchess Of York, says she's going to start a historical novel, starring an aristocratic redhead and set in the eighteenth century, "sort of like Pride and Prejudice meets 24. It's actually me putting myself in the eighteenth century… I can just imagine how it would be, and I have such fun!" [New York Magazine]
• Groan: Spencer Pratt now owns a music company, King Spencer Music. Be afraid. [TMZ]
• Entourage's Kevin Connolly says he thinks Rex Lee didn't really mean it when he said he was made fun of on the set because of his ethnicity and sexuality. Pardon? [TMZ]
• At the link, an obituary for Natasha Richardson by Ralph Fiennes. [Guardian]
• Add Kid Rock and Dave Grohl to the list of musicians suing bars for playing unlicensed music. [TMZ]
• LOL: 21-year-old Ekaterina Ivanova is calling ex-boyfriend, 65-year-old Rolling Stone Ronnie Wood, an "evil goblin." [Telegraph]
• CSI Miami's Jonathan Togo was arrested Friday for allegedly getting violent in a fight with his girlfriend; he was booked for felony domestic violence. [TMZ]
• A year after being rejected on TV, Bachelor contestant Melissa Rycroft got married. But not to a guy from TV. [Us Magazine]
• "Garth Brooks & Trisha Yearwood Celebrate Anniversary at McDonald's." [People]
• The Princess And The Frog was number one at the box office with a modest $25 million. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Bentley Meeker is a celebrity lighting guru and you are not. [Page Six]
• "I don't want to talk about him, except that I like him… I think everyone needs an adventure buddy." — Holly Madison on Benji Madden. [People]
• "Whenever anybody say they are going to give me some kind of award, I'm always a little stupefied by the notion. The first thing I say is 'why?' I just go to work like anyone else, except my job happens to be a little stranger." — Johnny Depp, when receiving a career achievement award at the Bahamas International Film Festival. [AP]
• "It makes certain cities impossible to live in. Like Sydney, it makes it impossible for us to live there… We certainly don't get that treatment in Tennessee. But it goes with the territory. It's just, we have to be careful, just to maintain some sort of semblance of a normal life for our child." — Nicole Kidman says attention from photographers is the reason she won't live in Sydney. [News.com.au]
• "I don't have a personal vendetta against Nicole Kidman… These are Machiavellian games that are being played and they are just not right. If she doesn't want to be photographed she should change her profession and become a butcher." — Paparazzo Jamie Fawcett, whom Nicole Kidman has requested a restraining order against and also took to court for placing a listening bug outside her home and following her in his car. [News.com.au]
• "Breaking up the band was a mistake because I think it broke trust with the audience. You had an audience that was very invested in that idea - whether they were invested in the people or the idea or the songs, I don't know. Like a relationship that you break off from and then try to pick back up, it's never quite the same. It doesn't mean it can't be as good, but it has to be different. That beautiful original feeling got lost in the interim of being away. If we had said, 'We just went away for seven years,' it would have been similar, but somehow breaking up, there's a violence to it." — Billy Corgan, on the Smashing Pumpkins. [WENN via Spinner]
• "If I didn't act, I'd be a nutcase. Some people have to do it. They have a lot of emotion they have to get out." — Rachel Weisz, who's in The Lovely Bones. [News.com.au]
• "My body is falling apart. The only way that I could do it is if I played a character who gets shot in the left leg and the right shoulder in the opening scene." — Kenny Rogers says he is too "decrepit" to be in Christmas In Canaan, the movie based on the book he wrote. [Daily Express]
• "Sometimes when I watch the show back I think we've gone too far because I see the pre-story beforehand, I can then see the audition from their perspective and there are times where I think I could have handled that better or I was in a bad mood and I was too rude. At the same time... no-one is sort of dragged kicking and screaming onto the audition set." — Simon Cowell. [BBC News]
• "A journalist went up to my  husband once and said 'did you know that dating anyone more than three years younger than you is considered pedophilia?' [Peter shot back] 'Really? My wife is seven years younger.'" — Maggie Gyllenhaal. [Gatecrasher]
• "Angry African-American women, you know, thought that it would be the image that people would associate with them. Virginiaca is definitely art imitating life, but I understand where they're coming from, and I don't have to project that onto mainstream America. What's funny is funny. This place is well known for getting angry letters — Lorne keeps 50 of them outside his office. It keeps you grounded in the fact that in late-night comedy, you're going to have to burn somebody." — Kenan Thompson. [New York Magazine]
• "I say 'Be Italian' many times in the song, but it was important to me that every time I say it, it have a different meaning, because there are so many different things about being Italian. There's love of life and food and sex and drink. There's love of dancing, love of singing. So it was putting all that into it." — Fergie, on her song in Nine. [NY Post]
• "The negative stuff is crazy and the positive stuff is crazy… I actually see all the discussion and controversy and, you know, 'Is it Smurfs and Dances With Wolves in space?' and all this crap, as good. It fuels interest. All those people that go online and repeatedly dismiss the movie day after day, I know they're going to be there watching it." — James Cameron on Avatar. [NY Post]
• "I think every little girl should be able to feel themselves the princess. I think every little girl is worthy of having a princely young man, and vice versa. It's really thrilling that Zahara will never have a moment where she didn't see herself in that light. She's Ethiopian. She comes from kings and queens. She should certainly know herself as a princess." — The Princess And The Frog's Anika Noni Rose, responding to Angelina Jolie's claim that she's ecstatic that daughter Zahara has a role model. [Ok!]
• "I'm working out again. I'm going to make the sequel to 300. My pecs will be glistening. I'll have a codpiece. I'm going to blow your mind." — Alec Baldwin. [Rush & Molloy]

• Oh, dear. Tiger Woods' fourth alleged mistress has been identified as Jamie Jungers, a cocktail waitress and "Trashygirls.com" model from Las Vegas. Jungers' mother, when asked if her daughter had been seeing Woods, answered: "Oh yeah for sure." [E!]

• The sister of another alleged mistress, a diner waitress named Mindy Lawton, says she knew what Tiger was up to: "My sister was just a little girl on an hourly wage at Perkins," Lynn Lawton says, "We knew what he wanted her for. But she wouldn't believe it. Maybe Tiger thought the security guards would think she was his cleaning lady,' Lynn conjectured. Or maybe they had just seen it all before and knew to turn a blind eye. [DailyMail]
• Lawton, meanwhile, has given a tell-all to the News of the World, spilling details of her sex life with Woods and stating about Woods' wife, Elin, that "It must be awful for her to know her husband was going behind her back for sex with so many girls. She must feel very dirty knowing that when he was trying for a baby with her he was having sex with me. I guess she will be pretty devastated but in the time I knew Tiger I never got the impression that the marriage was happy." [NewsOfTheWorld]
• And according to the Daily News, yet another woman, Cori Rist, was having an affair with Tiger, as well. "Tiger would typically get a large suite at a hotel. Someone would book Cori an adjacent room, so she wouldn't be seen coming into his room," says a source. [NYDN]
• Rachel Uchitel, the first woman whose name was attached to Tiger Woods during Mistress-A-Thon 2009, was reportedly upset when she learned of the other women Tiger was seeing: "Rachel was mad at Tiger when she found out about the other girls and did not speak to him for three days, but he texted her," says a source, "She is telling friends that he doesn't blame her for this all getting out." [People]
• Meanwhile, Tiger's wife, Elin Nordegren, signed a £1.4 million deal for a home on "on an island near Stockholm" just last week. [DailyExpress]
• After being hospitalized for allegedly swallowing a large amount of pills, Alexa Ray Joel, according to her rep, "is stable and her doctors are assessing her needs," and according to Alexa's father, Billy Joel, "She is going to be fine." [People]
• Donald Trump is none to happy about the fact that Michale Salahi was trying to pass herself off as a former Miss USA: "She couldn't have been a former Miss USA if she'd tried." [WashingtonPost]
• Eki "Eddie" Fatu, aka "Umaga," a former WWE wrestler, died Friday of a massive heart attack at the age of 36. [Yahoo]
• Susan Boyle is set to sing at the White House in January, not only to celebrate Michelle Obama's 46th birthday, but, according to a White House aide, for "a double celebration because three days later, January 20, marks the first anniversary of the president taking office. I would expect that a formal invitation will be made to Miss Boyle in the very near future. The President and First Lady absolutely love her voice and will be delighted if she agrees." [DailyExpress]
• Usher, who is guest-starring on tonight's episode of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, says the show makes him cry: "I can't say I'm a crier every time I watch. But, this time, I cried. They got me on camera crying. I couldn't help it." [PageSix]
• Ron Livingston of Office Space is suing Wikipedia for libel, as someone keeps editing Livingston's page to state that he is in a relationship with another man. Whoever has been editing the page has also set up Facebook profiles for Livingston and the man, Lee Dennison, claiming that the two are "in a relationship." [UPI]
• "Well, I live in Tennessee so it is slightly different than living in L.A. I just worked with Sophia Loren [in Nine], and she is so gorgeous and she has such grace. I use her as a role model."- Nicole Kidman, answering a reader's question on how she copes with "working in an industry that refuses to let women age naturally and gracefully." [People]
• Cate Blanchett says she doesn't have any movies lined up right now because "There's nothing I've read that's any good." [Showbiz411]
• After his last album only sold 121,000 copies, Marilyn Manson has been dropped by Interscope Records. He seems a bit relieved about it, though: "I was so restrained from the music that I wanted to make — what they would allow, they would put out, what ideas they would allow to be conveyed in these videos. At least half of my creative output has been squashed, so now I think people can expect a whole lot more." [UPI]
• Though Prince William and Kate Middleton haven't announced their engagement yet, the Royal Family has reportedly hired a "wedding and event consultant." [Telegraph]
• Taylor Lautner is in talks to play "Max Steel," an hero based on an action figure. He'll be no match for Max Power! [UPI]

• Lindsay Lohan's Hollywood home was burglarized over the weekend. Dina Lohan says:

"The safe was ripped out of the wall, and the door was off the hinges and door handles removed. Bags, shoes and jewelry were taken too. Thank God she wasn't home." Well, if she'd been home, they might not have broken in? Anyway Dina says Lindsay is "Okay, but upset." [People]

• A source says that surveillance video caught the men who broke into Lindsay's house on tape, and cops are investigating. Michael Lohan thinks it's an inside job, since the people that work for Lindsay didn't turn the alarm on. [TMZ]
• Ryan Jenkins, 32, the reality star suspect accused of killing his ex-wife, was found dead in a motel room in a Canadian town called Hope. An unidentified woman checked in for Jenkins and paid cash; cops have seized the slip of information she filled out for the room. [Vancouver Sun]
• An employee at the Thunderbird Motel says Ryan Jenkins was not recognizable: "In no way shape or form did he look like the man on TV. He looked spent." [AP]
• Before she hit the stage with her Miss Universe performance, Heidi Montag said: "I think people don't know what to expect, and how can they? It's my first performance live and it's in front of a billion eyes. So I'm very excited to show everyone what I'm coming with. I'm very excited for everybody to see this." And: "I think a lot of people are expecting something very different." If by "different" you mean "stilted" and "bad" then, yeah. [AP]
• Oprah wants to throw a giant party for the 10th anniversary of her magazine, and she'd like to shut down portions of the West Side Highway in NYC for the bash. [NY Post]
• "After Alec Baldwin told Playboy he might run against Joe Lieberman, the Connecticut senator replied, 'make my day.'" [Politico]
• Michael Jackson's kids spent the weekend in Las Vegas at the Palms Casino Resort, drinking virgin strawberry-banana daiquiris and playing in the pool. Grandma Katherine Jackson watched pool-side, with a friend and a nanny. [People]
• Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin snapped up the house next door to theirs in London and are creating a "£7million superhouse with 33 rooms." [Daily Mail]
• Sophia Bush was trying to hail a cab yesterday when she "accidentally flung" her arm into a woman passing by on a bicycle, knocking the woman to the ground. Sophia apologized and helped the woman up; the woman rode away. [UPI]
• Amy Winehouse performed with The Specials on Saturday night and it seems to have reinvigorated her! She says: "It's great to be back. I absolutely loved it out there. The fans and the atmosphere were great. It wasn't planned at all. I just went out and did it. I want to do my own gigs now." Video of Amy singing with the band at the link. [The Sun]
• Milla Jovovich married director Paul W.S. Anderson in Beverly Hills on Saturday, walking down the aisle of the backyard of the couple's Spanish-style house. The reception included cuban music and cake. [People]
• You can peep Milla's dress here. [E!]
• Prince William's girlfriend Kate Middleton will resign from working at her parents' internet party supply business at the end of the year and concentrate on photography. She'll head to New York for 2 weeks in January to work with Count Nikolai von Bismarck, who has trained with Annie Leibovitz. A source says: "It wouldn't be fitting for a future Queen to run a party website." [Daily Mail]
• Emma Roberts' boyfriend's neck is covered in hickeys. [Page Six]
• Khloé Kardashian is guest blogging for Ted Casablanca's The Awful Truth while Ted is on vacation. [E!]
• Terrence J, the dude Khloé Kardashian kissed one drunken night, says: "We are just friends. Neither one of us remembers the kiss. We were trying to remember who kissed whom first and we have both agreed to agree that it was just a long night where we both had some drinks and shared a good time." This lapse in memory could be due to booze or the fact that Terrence is in a relationship and is "very much in love." [People]
• Sources claim that Doug Reinhardt has been "begging" MTV producers for a contract and wants very badly to be on The Hills, but the network is not interested. [Page Six]
• Oasis cancelled their appearance at V Fest over the weekend because Liam Gallagher had laryngitis; Snow Patrol stepped in. [The Sun]
• Joan Jett is suing Jacqueline Fuchs, former bassist in The Runaways, who is trying to have the movie about The Runaways stopped and has demanded to see the script — even though there is no character based on her. [UPI]
• Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos cheered on 8-year-old daughter Lola, who was riding at the 34th Annual Hampton Classic Horse show on Sunday. Kelly says: "She's so dedicated that she misses everything else in the summer so she can go riding!" [Gatecrasher]
• Spotted: Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer, househunting in Santa Monica. [Gatecrasher]
• Hugh Jackman and Daniel Craig are in rehearsals for the Broadway play A Steady Rain, and the author, Kevin Huff, can't believe his good fortune: "These guys are in the prime of their careers," he says. "It's my understanding they're turning down movies to do this. I'm very lucky." [NY Daily News]
• The Rachel Zoe Project returns tonight, and this review says it "remains reliably bitchy television." [NY Daily News]
• Diablo Cody is on the cover of Inked magazine, and admits that she once was at a party with Robert Pattinson and didn't recognize him: "He's a beautiful man and I would certainly recognize him now… He wouldn't remember this happening. I honestly just went up and borrowed a light from him and I couldn't understand why there was this vibration in the crowd like, You're talking to him! I thought, You mean that guy with the cigarettes? Aw, this sounds terrible." [Inked]
• Shed a tear on your bearskin rug: The Burt Reynolds Museum may be closing. [UPI]
• A Texas blogger being sued by the mother of Anna Nicole Smith faces contempt of court for not turning in her computer. [UPI]
• Sophie Dahl and Jamie Cullum have chosen their wedding date and location: July 2010, at Hunton Park estate – a mansion set in 22 acres of parkland in Hertfordshire. Looks lush and amazing! [Daily Mail]
• "Rehab, drinking, Courtney Love, Owen Wilson's 'overdose': Steve Coogan confesses all." [Daily Mail]
• Former KISS guitarist Vinnie Vincent is suing the band and A&E television network for using his image without his permission. [TMZ]
• "'I want to marry again because I miss the sex' — Jerry Hall reveals she's on the lookout for love." [Daily Mail]
• Messy divorce news: David Alan Grier is seeking joint custody of his one-year-old daughter and looking to deny his estranged wife Christine Kim any spousal support. Christine was sole custody. [UPI]
• Blind item! "Which reality TV women party so hard every night that reporters gripe the ladies don't get out of bed to do phone interviews in the day?" [Page Six]
• "I was born on December 13, I was 13 when I got my first record deal and my Twitter name is taylorswift13. My first single, Tim McGraw, had a 13-second intro, and every time something good happens, 13 is involved. If I ever get a tattoo it will be '13.'" — Taylor Swift. [Daily Mail]
• "When Ally McBeal started, I went 'Oh, my God,' it's like what I was doing. Bridget Jones was in the same vein. I identify with all of them. We all can." — Melanie Mayron, who played a redheaded photographer, an "independent, creative, quirky and funny" single woman in her 30s on thirtysomething. [LA Times]
• "After two dance sessions, I can tell you Cheryl Burke is the most patient person I have ever met." — Dancing With The Stars contestant and former Republican House Majority Leader Tom DeLay. [MSNBC Scoop]
• "I wouldn't want to be 20 again for anything. I am much happier now than when I was younger. You have to discover who you are, who you are going to be, there are so many insecurities. Today, I know the things that I need, the things that I can live without." — Monica Bellucci. [Daily Mail]
• Q: So you're not getting married any time soon? A: "No, we're not into that. I think we have some sort of thing in California? What's it called? The civil equality or something. Domestic partnership! They sent us a piece of paper and it's like, oh, now what? She has her health insurance, I have mine. I'd put her on mine, but you know it's too much paperwork. We'll get around to it." — Sandra Bernhard on her girlfriend, with whom she's been with for 10 years. [LA Times]

• Lindsay Lohan is being sued by a Florida chemist named Jennifer Sunday, who claims the actress stole the formula for Sevin Nyne tanning mist.

Lindsay says she co-created the formula with Lorit Simon, a Las Vegas businesswoman who air-brushes tans for celebrities. But Simon had signed a confidentiality agreement in January with Sunday's company. By the way, Sevin Nyne is named after Lindsay's lucky numbers. [St. Petersburg Times]

• The Real Housewives Of New York want more cash before they'll return to the show next season. We're talking six figures, a clothing allowance and money for hair and makeup. Bravo is responding by interviewing replacements, haha. [Gatecrasher]
• Are Countess LuAnn de Lesseps and Count Alex on the verge of a reconciliation? [Page Six]
• "Rihanna's Risqué Fashion Choice Of Pasties Ensures No One Looks At Her Hairstyle." [NY Daily News]
• In a ceremony yesterday, Prince William was made an honorary barrister. He says: "I play football, rugby and water polo, not very well, but particularly pride myself in being a quite magnificent armchair centre-back at football and flanker at rugby... and now you have made me a barrister  I promise not to practise, except for the odd speeding ticket." [Telegraph]
• Barack Obama on Michael Jackson: "There are certain figures in our popular culture that just capture peoples' imagination, and in death they become even larger. I have to admit that it's also fed by a 24/7 media that is insatiable." [CBS News]
• The Michael Jackson memorial is today, and Mariah Carey, Stevie Wonder, Usher and Lionel Richie will be taking part. [Reuters]
• Debbie Rowe, biological mother of Michael's children, will not attend. [NY Post]
• Will Michael Jackson's son, Prince Michael Jackson, perform today?!?!?! [MSNBC Scoop]
• The Jackson family was at Forest Lawn Cemetery in Los Angeles last night, viewing the body. [TMZ, People]
• Michael Jackson's mother, Katherine, has turned his bedroom into a shrine, with life-size wax models from Madame Tussauds and his old report cards. [The Sun]
• Word on Michael Jackson's kids  who have not been seen since his death  is that they are with their grandmother, Katherine, and are "doing as OK as can be expected." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Uh-oh: A Liz Taylor-Michael Jackson drug link? This piece details "How Taylor's pill habit fed Jackon's addiction, how the two shared the same doctor, and the warnings they both received." [The Daily Beast]
• In this interview, Brooke Shields  who first met Michael Jackson when she was 13  says as Michael grew up, "the more asexual he became to me." She also says: "He was like a little kid who talked about the bases - what first base was, what second base was," Shields said. "It sounded very odd to the outside, I can imagine, but to the inside, to someone who's never really left his bubble, you can understand how he would be curious." [AP via Rolling Stone]
• Robin Leach has a blog (!?!) where he writes: "Just 48 hours before his death, Michael Jackson was 'in a high state of stress and emotional drama, fearing that he would never be able to complete the 50-concert run in London, and it would kill him.'" [Vegas Deluxe]
• Ugh, every funny or crazy thing the poor man said is now coming out as a headline. For instance: "Michael Jackson Wanted To Clone Himself." [Mirror]
• In a police report from 2004, five doctors are named as continually prescribing drugs for Michael Jackson. [The Wrap]
• Congressman Peter King  who ranted about MJ over the weekend  has more to say. He calls the coverage of the singer's death an "orgy of glorification." [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson news = huge traffic for TMZ. [AP]
• When Megan Fox went to Michael Bay's house to audition for Transformers, "He made her wash his Ferrari while he filmed her." Apparently this footage is now missing. [Page Six]
• Madonna is in talks to perform on Simon Cowell's X Factor show; Lady GaGa and Rihanna may also make appearances. [The Sun]
• By the by: Madonna has plans to do a concert in Warsaw, Poland on a day celebrating the Virgin Mary; Lech Walesa calls this "Satanic provocation." [Reuters]
• The Office's Jenna Fischer: Engaged! [People]
• A Brit paper claims Kelly Osbourne called Lady GaGa a "butterface": Kelly responds, "I have a big mouth and that's no secret… BUT when words are being put into my mouth and things are being printed that I did not say it really makes me really mad. I am a huge fan of Lady GaGa. If anything i'm slightly jealous of her wardrobe and I am definitely in no position to be calling anyone a butter face." [Perez]
• Diddy's White Party is being called "B-list" because Tila Tequila, Tara Reid and Tom Green were there, but what about Ashton Kutcher, Demi Moore, Russell Brand, Jonah Hill and Lindsay Lohan? [Page Six]
• Twilight star Kellan Lutz and 90210's AnnaLynne McCord are so totally on, but don't want people to know. Luckily, you don't even care, do you? [Page Six]
• Scores, a "gentleman's club" in New York City, has offered Heidi Montag $25,000 to strip. [PopCrunch]
• Paula Abdul calls the American Idol panel a dysfunctional family of sorts." To wit: "I'm the nurturing mom, Simon's the disapproving dad, and Randy's the cool brother." Oh, and forgotten stepsister, whatshername? [AP]
• Here is a sentence from a story about Agyness Deyn's love life: "Agyness Deyn is now all loved up with cheeky Scouse musician Miles Kane from The Rascals, who is also one half of The Last Shadow Puppets." Got it? [The Sun]
• Well, this should be insane: Kathy Griffin will host Comedy Central's roast on Joan Rivers. "I will be roasting Joan with more gentleness and tenderness than her latest chemical peel," quips Kath. [Variety]
• Bruce Willis' Idaho ski lodge burned down earlier this year, and the actor is planning on rebuilding bigger and better. [USA Today]
• Ooh la la: Kristin Scott Thomas will star in a production of A Little Night Music on the stage in Paris. [Variety]
• My übercrush Benicio Del Toro visited a prison in Puerto Rico Monday, telling inmates in a theater group: "I believe everyone needs a second chance… I am here to help reaffirm that as long as there is life, you can still help society in some way, you can improve yourself." [AP]
• Even though Winona Ryder has said a Heathers sequel was "in the works," the film's director, Michael Lehmann, says: "Winona brings it up every once in a while and [writer] Dan Waters and I will joke about it but as far as I know there's no script and no plans to do the sequel. I never thought it made sense to see a sequel to a movie which took place in a specific time and specific place and in which many of the characters got killed off." Well. Fuck me gently with a chain saw. [Daily Express]
• Anna Kournikova was seen with a huge diamond ring on THAT finger but tried to hide it and refused to elaborate. [AP, Page Six]
• Blind item! "Damage control! Which hard-partying actor rushed back to his local AA chapter when he was caught drinking, but is actually still on the sauce?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Quidditch is right up there with the least fun things I've done in Harry Potter. It's not a pleasant experience, it does hurt quite a lot and it's not something I would rush back to."  Daniel Radcliffe. [Telegraph]
• "I've had a cross tattooed over the tattoo I got of his name. I won't get his name removed because he was part of my life but I just want to get on with the divorce now."  Katie "Jordan" Price on estranged hubs Peter Andre. [The Sun]
• "I would like to think I haven't been influenced by him too much just by playing him for so long. I am thrilled to have this in my life, but it is separate from my life, you know? It's nice to be called Dan. And actually I started correcting people now. You do feel like a bit of an idiot doing that, but at the same time, in the long run it is better for us. I know it's better for me."  Daniel Radcliffe, who would like to remind you that he is not actually Harry Potter. [LA Times]

• One of the hazards of dating a rock star: When, mid-fight, you want to throw some of his stuff into a pool, there's a slight risk that he might have unreleased, non-backed-up new songs among his personal effects. [Mirror]

• "I used to bring pies to the office," says amateur baker Peter Som. "I can't eat them all myself." How did that dude ever get fired? [WWD]
• Thus spake Lacroix: "Don't tell anyone, because I'm not allowed to do this, but we absolutely are going to have a show in mid-July, during Fashion Week –- and it won't be a funeral: it'll be a fightback." Since Christian Lacroix's fashion house, owned by the U.S.-based Falic group, entered bankruptcy, the fate of the couture show has been in serious doubt. "It can't cost us a single Euro to put this show on, because I'm not having my workers lose a penny from their pockets, but so far, it looks like thanks to other people's kindness  friends and suppliers working for free  it might happen. I can't stand the idea that people think I am to blame [for the bankruptcy] but to a certain extent I am paying for not having done what everyone else did, with their logos and It-bags. I never went down that route." Lacroix has been working for free for 18 months, and is owed 1.2 million Euros in back pay. [Telegraph]
• Model Lily Cole earned a first in her end of year art history exams at Cambridge, one of only three students to receive the top grade. [Mirror]
• Yigal Azrouel, whose relationship with Katie Lee Joel is rumored to have brought about the end of the latter's marriage to Billy Joel, romances a lot of ladies. (He is an attractive, straight man working in fashion. Duh.) One rumor alleges Azrouel sleeps with editors at magazines to further his career. [P6]
• Chanel and Burberry model Emma Watson is said to be launching a clothing line for children and teens to benefit Unicef. [Hindustan Times]
• Usher says his men's fragrance really "represents the growth I've had in the last two years." VIP, which he's set to launch this September, is a "tool of engagement for seduction...made for a man but for women to enjoy." [WWD]
• Uh-oh. Sales of perfumes fell 6% overall in 2008, and 7% during the first quarter of 2009. Estée Lauder's fragrance division said the last three months of 2009 saw sales fall 20%, and another perfume company executive said anonymously that he believed sales for this year were down 15-20% because distributors are not restocking after selling to retailers. [NYTimes]
• "I don't want to do 'Adele by Adele' perfume!" says Adele. [LATimes]
• A judge refused to dismiss gourmet butter distributor Clint Arthur's lawsuit against Louis Vuitton for selling off-cuts of fabric as art prints. [P6]
• You really know you've hit the event horizon of aspirational shopping when someone from a company that makes plastic shoes describes her products as "affordable luxury." [LATimes]
• Robin Givhan at the Washington Post sees in H&M's just-announced collaboration with Jimmy Choo the end of luxury as we know it. "There's something about cheap Jimmy Choo shoes that doesn't feel right," writes the critic. "Women's shoes have been sold on a centuries-old mythology that makes the discovery that Jimmy Choo can produce a desirable pair of shoes for less than $50 as jarring as when Dorothy pulled back the curtain on the Wizard." [WaPo]
• Actually, the cheapest offering from Jimmy Choo's H&M collection will retail at around 40 Euros, or $55. The 12 women's styles and four men's models will range in price from there up to 200 Euros, or $138. Bags will cost up to 200 Euros. It all goes on sale in select H&M stores on November 14. [WWD]
• Cool looking Missoni-printed Converse Chuck Taylors will also be a thing you can buy, starting next summer. [WWD]
• Prince William's girlfriend Kate Middleton is, according to rumor, sitting on an offer for a year-long internship at American Vogue from Anna Wintour. Middleton, a former fashion buyer, could take her pick of either working in New York or Los Angeles. [Hindu]
• Jason Wu anticipates $4 million in sales this year and sees a men's wear division in his future. The 26-year-old enjoys spending his Sundays browsing at the Strand and playing poker with a $20 buy-in, "just enough to take it seriously but not enough to feel bad when you lose." [NYTimes]
• The Fall Calvin Klein Collection and CK Calvin Klein ads have leaked  they feature Monika "Jac" Jagaciak and Jourdan Dunn and Sigrid Agren, respectively. The Collection campaign was shot by David Sims and CK by Craig McDean. [Fashionologie]
• Isaac Mizrahi is opening a store for his namesake label in August. It'll be 1500 square feet and located on the Upper East Side. [WWD]
• Cashmere prices have fallen so drastically that many herders of cashmere goats have had to sell their animals for meat. Orders for winter cashmere sweaters from the West have fallen by up to 30%. And get ready for a cold season: the garments being made are using less cashmere. "They are too small  half the breast is outside the sweater," said one factory's sales manager. [NYTimes]
• Jil Sander is on the comeback trail in a big way. The German designer, who lost the use of her name to Prada when the Italian company bought out her house and fired her, has just announced a fine jewelry collaboration with Damiani. This is in addition to her new position as a creative director of Uniqlo. [WWD]

• According to this report, Jennifer Aniston is "struggling" to stay away from John Mayer:

Last week she sent him a "hand-delivered, perfumed note" before one of his concerts, and it read, "Play well, you always do." Then she moped around her mansion and sobbed giant old lonely spinster tears. [Daily Express]

• Rihanna is reportedly not nervous about testifying in court today. [E!, NY Post, NY Daily News]
• Meanwhile, Chris Brown will be working with Keri Hilson. [E!]
• Chris Brown will listen to Rihanna give a detailed description of how he struck her in the car today. And: Um, his next song may be called "Smash." [TMZ]
• Madonna's new daughter Mercy was flown to London of the weekend. [People, NY Daily News]
• "Eliza Manyoza, a banana vendor in Malawi's colonial-era capital Zomba, says she has never heard a Madonna song. She only knows the American pop icon as an "adopter" of orphaned children. 'I am told she is a nice woman who wants to help our children.'" [Breitbart]
• Anna Faris married Chris Pratt in Hawaii on Saturday. In the photograph, Pratt is wearing, tight, star-spangled flag-inspired swim trunks. [Radar Online]
• Lindsay Lohan has a new tattoo that the paparazzi can't read, even though they zoomed in on her arm as she arrived at Samantha Ronson's house in L.A. But actually, the big mystery in these photographs? LL's choice of hideous shoes. [Daily Mail]
• Lindsay Lohan's new show with Ryan Seacrest is all about giving people on the wrong track a second chance. [TMZ, NY Daily News]
• "Jon on Father's Day: 'I Don't Know' Where Kate Is." [People]
• Is Jon Gosselin moving to NYC? [NY Daily News]
• Was Perez Hilton assaulted by Will.I.Am from the Black Eyed Peas? And if so, why did Perez use Twitter as a means of alerting the cops? Wouldn't a phone be quicker? [Digital Spy, TechCrunch]
• Will.I.Am has a video response, in which he says Perez was rude to Fergie and called Will a "faggot," and then fans went crazy. [Dipdive]
• A play-by-play of Evan Rachel Wood at a trapeze lesson. [The New Yorker]
• One of the cops who is under investigation for breaking into the home of the woman acting as a surrogate for Sarah Jessica Parker originally said he was trying to sell stuff to the National Enquirer, but now he says: "I'm not exactly sure. If the National Enquirer didn't have anything to do with this, then I publicly apologize." [TMZ]
• By the by, Sarah Jessica Parker has a new car but doesn't know how to turn the lights on. [Page Six]
• If Victoria Beckham had her breast implants reduced or removed so that she could be in Vogue, it's just another testament to the power of Anna Wintour. [Daily Mail]
• Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty: Back on? [Daily Mail]
• Is Prince William shopping for a "Malibu honeymoon pad"? [Daily Express]
• When Prince William and Kate Middleton booked a vacation house, they used the names Mr. and Mrs. Smith. [Telegraph]
• Prince Harry's been hanging out with ex Chelsy Davy. [The Sun]
• Kanye and Amber are still "very happy and affectionate." [The Sun]
• According to this report, Foxy Brown was "pampered" during her stay at Rikers Island  she got meals in her cell, makeup and unlimited TV and phone use. [NY Post]
• Joel Madden says Nicole Richie's second pregnancy is "a lot easier" than the first: "You've already been through it and it's not as intense and dramatic. We're a little more relaxed. It's actually kind of nice." [People]
• Kelly Osbourne is working on a book called Fierce: "It's about all the major things girls go through before they turn 21," she explains. "It's 16 chapters where I explain what I did and where I went wrong, and then I offer professional advice on how to do things differently." Noted. [WWD]
• Here's a Father's Day column penned by Nicole Kidman, who says: "My father, Anthony, is a very good and decent man. He's Catholic, and he has a strong set of values based on religion, but which really come down to being a good person, being tolerant of other people, and doing unto others what you would wish them to do to you." [Daily Mail]
• Rachel Bilson is so close to Hayden Christensen's family, his grandmother calls her "my future granddaughter." [Page Six]
• Dennis Quaid and his wife have agreed to a $500,000 settlement with the hospital that nearly killed his newborn twins by overdosing them with blood thinner. [USA Today]
• Cloris Leachman filmed a guest spot for Jada Pinkett Smith's new show, Hawthorne: "I was a patient. I threw a bedpan at her. It was a very emotional part. I used the bedpan to show my feelings. I made use of it. I didn't USE it. Haha." [NY Mag]
• In this column for the Daily Fail, Simon Cowell writes about Britian's Got Talent: "I didn't get into show business to make little children cry or upset a nice lady like Susan Boyle… But the question remains: should we have done things differently?" [Daily Mail]
• From an interview with Emily Blunt: "When I mention [former love Michael] Bublé's name, I am treated to a stare that is so glacial it could freeze an ant at 500 paces. Is she seeing anyone at the moment? 'Weirdly enough, I'm going to pass on that. You know, apparently I'm seeing everyone. I think someone said I was dating Anne Hathaway in a story recently.'" [Guardian]
• In this article, Betty White and The Proposal director Anne Fletcher have tea and it turns into a "gigglefest." [NY Times]
• David Duchovny and Téa Leoni: Still in love. [People]
• Oh, crap: Peaches Geldof has been studying Scientology for nine months. [Mirror]
• "It's not really an internship. I'm just there for two weeks to see how it works," she said. "I'm listening to the editors, seeing what the fashion department does, what marketing does, what the photo department does. It's all over the place. "Everything is interesting… I really like the fashion department."  Tallulah Willis on her stint at Harper's Bazaar. [NY Mag]
• Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony want Washington, D.C. to pay attention to their campaign to fight childhood obesity, especially among Latino kids. [US News & World Report]
• Kathy Hilton says she's not sad that her daughter Paris and Doug Reinhardt broke up: "Doug was riding Paris' coattails." [E!]
• Cristiano Ronaldo says of hanging out with Paris Hilton: "She was a really cool girl and we had a great time talking. I am a young man and Paris a young lady, and us talking in a club is just what normal people our age do." [The Sun]
• Matthew McConaughey and Camila Alves: Expecting baby number two. [People]
• Twilight's Ashley Greene says she is not dating Adrian Grenier  they were just attending the same surfing event. Ashley says: "It's kind of annoying sometimes because I have been linked to so many guys, but I have been single forever!" [Us Magazine]
• Behind the scenes of the new Harry Potter movie! [Guardian]
• There are three country stars in bikinis on the cover of Shape and one of them, LeAnn Rimes, talks about being accused of stalking by Ediie Cibrian's wife: ""I feel like people are looking and pointing at me…" [People]
• Congrats to Rachel Griffiths, who recently gave birth to a baby girl, her third child. [People]
• Duran Duran: Working with Mark Ronson. [The Star]
• Mark Ronson and Perez Hilton have had a falling out, and Perez admits he is "petty." [Daily Express]
• Looking for a cute anecdote about Robert Redford and Paul Newman? Click the link. [Daily Express]
• "It is exactly the same - it doesn't make a difference whether it is a woman or a man. It is about a passionate relationship, it is good, intense and quite an unusual story."  Eva Greene, on playing a boarding school teacher who seduces one of her female students in upcoming film Cracks. [Mirror]
• "People think cameras follow you 24/7. It's really not like that. We have set hours, set days, just like any scripted show."  Denise Richards, on It's Complicated. [Yahoo News via AP]
• Q: Are there any women you would get it on with? "Agyness Deyn. She's a little punk-rock Lolita. Beautiful face, beautiful shoulders. I look at her and think, 'Ooh, I'm so turned on. What's happening?'"  Katy Perry. [Times Of London]
• "I would argue that as culturally diverse as L.A. is, and it's one of the most diverse places on the planet, it is shockingly segregated. And that's why I love New York so much and, on one level, San Francisco. You step out your door and you're swept up in a sea of humanity whether you want to be or not. You can stay in your car in L.A. and avoid anyone you want to."  Benjamin Bratt. [LA Times]
• "There are enough reality-TV stars out there who clearly want attention and fame. I personally don't think they know what they're getting into, but it's a very human instinct. I never wanted to be famous. I just wanted to act. So it's very odd. Here I am doing something that's a real actor thing to do and I'm being treated like a celebrity. I was going to take this year off from being a celebrity!"  Anne Hathaway, who is doing Shakespeare in the Park. [NY Mag]
• "She is there every waking moment of my life. It's always something. Things happen to me every single day. I will be in a tiny café and suddenly a version of "Over The Rainbow" will start to play." Lorna Luft, on her mother, Judy Garland. [Daily Express]
• "Don't get me wrong  I am thankful for a round of antibiotics or surgery when necessary but I have been helped tremendously by the practices [of acupuncture and cupping] that help the body heal itself. When implemented by a professional with experience, the benefits can work wonders."  Gwyneth Paltrow's been flinging GOOP. [Daily Express]
• "Children have always responded to me because I have that cartoon-character look. I'm over-exaggerated and my voice is small and my name is Dolly and I'm kind of like a Mother Goose character. So I think that it's going to be a fun thing."  Dolly Parton, on her children's book, I Am A Rainbow. [Time]

[London, England, June 13. Image via Getty.]

• Miley Cyrus, America's favorite daughter of a once-mulleted country singer, hasgasp!pierced her nose. Shock me shock me shock me with that actually pretty typical and normal for a sixteen year old behavior! [People]

• "I'll let people think what they will," Miley says about her new piercing. "I hope no one is upset at me for doing it. I think it's lame for it to be such a big deal because ... it's just temporary. You can take it out." [USWeekly]
• Who could have put such rebellious thoughts into young Hannah Montana's brain? "I am a huge Kelly Clarkson fan," Cyrus says, "And I loved when she had her nose pierced." So our first American Idol has inspired our latest teen idol to put a tiny stud in her nose? You know what that means, people. End of civilization. Will someone please think of the children?!?![USWeekly]
• And speaking of teen pop sensations, here's a video of the New Kids On The Block hangin' tough with their fans at a Waffle House. [TMZ]
• Uh, Happy 10th Anniversary, Jon and Kate Gosselin? Woo? Congrats? And many more? [People]
• "I was arrested - what is the big deal? I haven't gotten as much as a traffic ticket in all these years."- Danielle Staub of the Real Housewives Of New Jersey on her scandalous past. [People]
• Travis McCoy is denying tabloid reports that he was seen leaving a club with two "buxom beauties" by his side and that his relationship with Katy Perry is in trouble as a result: "I was not familiar with that story," McCoy says, "It sounds really out of character." [DailyExpress]
• Meanwhile, Katy Perry's bus was vandalized by a would-be robber who was caught in the act. Katy didn't seem to upset by it, as she posted on her Twitter page: "some1 just broke into our bus, they got caught. Luckily all there is is glitter, catsuit outfits, fruit & a box set of Ab Fab. Sux fer them." Hello?! Someone tried to steal your AbFab box set! If you're not upset by that then you seriously don't deserve to own it, sweetie darling. [PerezHilton]
• Drea de Matteo became engaged to her longtime boyfriend, Shooter Jennings, during one of Shooter's recent concerts. According to a source, "[Drea] was dancing on the side of the stage holding [the couple's 18-month-old daughter] Alabama when [Shooter] called her on stage. She was so surprised by the proposal." [People]
• Chace Crawford reportedly auditioned shirtless to win the lead role in the upcoming remake of Footloose: "He took off his shirt, he was in his T-shirt and jeans, and hit it. And that's the kind of man I wanted for this role," says director Kenny Ortega. At least he got to keep his Sunday shoes on, I guess? [MTV]
• Jennifer Aniston, Courteney Cox, and Sheryl Crow spent last night supporting a good cause: a night devoted to "Stamp Out Violence Against Women and Girls of the Congo." Says Cox: "We can do something about this. I want to bring awareness to this." [People]
• Shania Twain has checked in with fans after taking some time off to deal with her divorce, which took place one year ago. "I'm enjoying my child, friends and family like I haven't in years, and it's great," Twain says, "I've been experiencing and seeing new things every day, living life with a different and more optimistic attitude." Also? She's still not impressed much by your car or the fact that you're Brad Pitt. [People]
• Usher is still expected to file for divorce from his wife, Tameka Foster Raymond, but sources say that Foster Raymond is still committed to the relationship: "She's been in his life for so long. She's very loyal to him. Tameka is the type of woman to stick it out." [People]
• Joy Behar says she wants to book Sarah Palin on The Joy Behar Show: "She would do very well with me, because I'm not out to get Sarah Palin," Behar says, "I want to hear from her, she has things to say." [HuffingtonPost]
• Whoops! A tabloid mistakenly (shock) reported that Kristen Chenoweth had rekindled an old romance with Lane Garrison by writing the former Prison Break star prison pen pal letters. Not true, says Chenoweth's rep: "Kristin Chenoweth and Lane Garrison have not rekindled a relationship, nor was there any pen pal correspondence throughout his incarceration." [People]
• Is Prince William finally going to marry Kate Middleton? A source says yes: "He has to. Been seeing her too long not to. It would be another embarrassment for the Palace." [NYPost]
• Samantha Ronson won't be doing a reality show anytime soon, according to her Twitter: "Why are people asking me if I'm doing a reality tv show? That's the most absurd rumour ever. I'd rather stick needles in my eyes." [Samantha Ronson's Twitter]
• Meanwhile, Trent Reznor has had it with your crap and is quitting Twitter "because at the end of the day it's now doing more harm than good in the bigger picture and the experiment seems to have yielded a result. Idiots rule." [NYObserver]
• Ashanti is ready to take on her role as Dorothy in the upcoming Broadway revival of The Wiz, and says her bond with her cast mates makes things easier: "Everyone is gelling really well, we're laughing and joking and it just feels really good. Because it's like teamwork: Everyone wants everyone to do well, and they're fully supportive. Any questions that I have they're like, `I got you!'"[Yahoo]
• Nia Vardalos and John Corbett, who starred in My Big Fat Greek Wedding together, are teaming up once again to star in a film titled (sigh) I Hate Valentine's Day. [People]
• Stephen Baldwin's foreclosed home is set to be auctioned off. [Yahoo]
• Is Lauren Conrad engaged to boyfriend Kyle Howard? Star magazine says yes. [NYDN]
• But wait! "A source close to Lauren's camp" says that the engagement rumor is "100% false." [Hollyscoop]
• Bret Michaels is still talking about his Tonys mishap, and says he was "bummed that I did not get to attend the after parties, cuz rumor has it Anne Hathaway was going to be there and she is hot." Oh yeah right. Like Princess Mia would be caught dead on the Rock of Love Bus. She doesn't want to rock your world, Bret. And don't even try to hitch a Rock Of Love Plane to Genovia. Queen Clarisse won't allow it. Your tour ends here, buddy. [PerezHilton]

[Lichfield, England; April 24. Image via Getty.]

LICHFIELD, ENGLAND - APRIL 24: Prince William tours the National Memorial Arboretum where he launched an GBP 8 million appeal to make the Alrewas site a world famous centre for remembrance on April 24, 2009 in Lichfield, England. Prince William was officially made the patron of the Future Foundations Appeal. During the poignant visit he viewed the names of his Sandurst platoon commander Major Alexis Roberts of the 1st Battalion The Royal Gurkha Rifles, killed in Afgahanistan and Intelligence Officer Joanna Dyer who trained in his platoon and killed near Basra. (Photo by Christopher Furlong/Getty Images)

• El oh el: It appears none of the celebrity weeklies have bought exclusive rights to pictures of Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt's wedding this weekend.

A source says they're not worried, because chances are, the pix will end up in all the mags: "They'd rather be on page 50 of Us, People, In Touch or Life & Style than be on the cover of a magazine like OK! that isn't going to sell. They need to make money, and so does the magazine. The formula is changing," spills a source. [MSNBC Scoop]

• In this video of concert footage, Britney's extensions get ripped out of her head and left behind on a couch. [Perez Hilton]
• Kudos to TMZ for the headline, "Britney Weaves It All On Stage." [TMZ]
• Lily Allen celebrated the end of her tour by having a "massive ice cream fight" in her dressing room. But she paid the clean-up bill: "Cost me $2,000. End of tour, time to get mashed." [The Sun]
• In case you forgot that Madonna's boyfriend Jesus Luz has a job, he totally walked the runway in a Jeffrey Fashion Cares fashion show. How do we feel about those white trousers? [WWD]
• Even though Miley Cyrus is with Justin Gaston, is she still hung up on her ex, Nick Jonas? Were they making out recently? Are they MFEO (made for each other)? [Gatecrasher]
• Jay Leno, who hasn't missed work in years, checked himself into a hospital with a "mystery illness." [NY Daily News]
• Paris Hilton's "BFF," Brittany Flickinger, was in a car crash in Hollywood last night; she wasn't wearing a seat belt and slammed her head into the windshield. Luckily, she escaped with only a chipped bone in her leg. [TMZ]
• Behold: Video of Justin Timberlake, in foxy glasses, talking about his mancrush on LeBron James: "He just lights me up!" He also declares Caddy Shack as the best sports movie ever. [Rolling Stone]
• Ashton Kutcher's Twitter can now be considered a place to break new artists; he wrote about an unsigned singer/songwriter named Alex Highton and now the guy's MySpace is blowing up. [Telegraph]
• Guess who stars in one of Kanye West's next videos? Rihanna. Yeezy says, "She's an amazing talent…Collaborating with her is always a pleasure!" [Fashion Week Daily]
• Amy Winehouse's dad flew to St. Lucia yesterday to check on the singer. Will they go horseback riding together? [The Sun]
• Beyoncé wants to do Broadway in a couple of years, when she's settled down and had some rugrats with Jay-Z: "It's my ideal job," she explains. "I'll be able to go to the theater every day and drop my kids off and maybe make some food  maybe I'll know how to cook by then  and then go do what I love and have some normalcy and have a regular schedule." [Reuters]
• Kim Kardashian on Miss California, Carrie Prejean: "I don't agree with her narrow mindedness and neither do a lot of people… Everyone has the right to be happy and be treated equally and I think not allowing gay marriage just kind of puts us back." But KK also says: "Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. She stood up for what she believes in so she should be happy with that backlash." [People]
• Is Pam Anderson down and out? Or is Courtney Love high? Wait. Don't answer that. Courtney says: "Pam Anderson doesn't even have a credit card. And she lives in Paradise Cove  which is in Malibu, but it's a trailer park in Malibu." [Page Six]
• This piece about Russell Crowe begins: "He is a man's man - or, rather, he is the kind of man in whom shabby, ageing, overweight, altogether untidy and unresolved males can see their manly image. In other words, Russell Crowe seems more than happy taking very little care of himself, his appearance or his 'glamour.'" Why don't you tell us how you really feel? [Guardian]
• Jerry Seinfeld's grandparents arrived in this country via Ellis Island, and their story will be in the spotlight on May 19, when the Statue of Liberty-Ellis Island Foundation bestows a "family heritage" award on Seinfeld. [NY Times]
• Parker Posey is no longer dating Keanu Reeves and has moved on to a graphic designer and sculptor named Scott Lenhardt. As seen in this picture, they're super happy and adorbs. [NY Mag]
• Aww, pictures of Slumdog Millionaire stars Dev Patel and Freida Pinto nuzzling up to each other over lunch in Israel  where Pinto is filming  will melt your cold, tiny heart. [Daily Mail]
• This report calls Kate Middleton Prince William's "bride in waiting," and notes that it's been discovered that she's related to Swallows And Amazons creator Arthur Ransome. [Daily Express]
• Blogger Julia Allison lives in the same apartment building as Rosie O'Donnell. Wednesday she posted a Twitter which read: "Holy shit. My neighbor Rosie O'Donnell has been having a knock down drag out screaming match with Kelli for the last hour. Sad. :( " Anywho, JA deleted the post, maybe because it's an invasion of privacy, but it's sorta too late. [Ed note: This will be the only mention of Ms. Allison on this blog for all of 2009.] [Gawker]
• Dane Cook was on Larry King Live, talking about his half-brother and former manager who embezzled millions from him: "It's a terrible betrayal. But hopefully justice will be served and I can move on with my life." [ET]
• Sniffle: Elton John, Paul McCartney and Mick Jagger have lost "huge chunks" of their personal fortunes due to the economic crisis. [Reuters]
• Stephen Dorff has joined the cast of the porn industry comedy Born To Be A Star, which is produced and co-written by Adam Sandler. [Variety]
• Blind item! "Which closeted - and married - actor almost had his cover blown when he hit on a straight man in a sauna? Word is the offended dude is now quite wealthy, thanks to a payoff." [Gatecrasher]
• "Although I'm her friend, [I don't want to defend her to her detractors] because that's their right as well. They feel really strongly about their opinion for pro-gay rights, and that's great."  Miss USA on Miss California. [Gatecrasher]
• "I realized I was spending hours and hours in the middle of the night signing autographs. Unless I had assistants forging letters and signatures I knew I couldn't continue. So I posted a message on the internet saying: 'If I can't do it honestly, I won't do it any more.'"  Viggo Mortensen, on answering fan mail. [Daily Mail]
• "He called me and said, 'You know let's do it right away.' It was really emotional. I think the only way he could have come back was right after because his family was all there to support his boys. Liam is heroic. He came back and finished. I think he's trying to absorb [what's happened] ... He's suddenly a single parent with absolutely no preparation for that. But he is surrounded by people that really love him. There is a lot of support."  Director Atom Egoyan, on Liam Neeson, who returned to the set of the film Chloe days after his wife Natasha Richardson died. [People]
• "We're just extremely careful with our shit. I keep a CD with me, I'm the only one who usually has a CD. Maybe me and Dre… Other than that, nobody has it."  Eminem, on how his new album avoided getting leaked. [Rolling Stone]
• "Watching it was horribly unhealthy for me. You think that would help keep me sober, you know seeing myself as this raving lunatic...It absolutely triggered these crazy urges to get loaded."  Steve-O on watching his upcoming documentary about his addiction and recovery. [E!]
• "For some reason people think like if you tell someone they're too thin that's OK. But if you tell someone they're too heavy that's insulting… It hurts either way. I'm the same weight I was before I was pregnant. I've been pregnant for two years in a row. I'm the same weight I was on 90210. I'm the same weight I was before I met Dean and we got married. It's the same."  Tori Spelling. [AP]
• "If you read some of his early-life autobiography, it's horrible... the amount of mental anguish he has to go through, just to have any kind of even vaguely sexual relationship. It's really depressing what he's going through in his head. Dali had a massive fear of penetration – penetrating someone or being penetrated… [As for the love scenes with a man,] I think girls almost really like watching something like that. From what I've read, people really get excited about that – it sounds really sexy!"  Robert Pattinson on playing Salvador Dali. [Independent]
• "Marijuana has always been that drug that united people. It's always been on the verge of being legal. It's hardly a drug really. When people look at marijuana, they look at it as an enjoyment of connecting."  Redman. [NY Daily News]
• "Most of the time, songs that I write end up being finished in 30 minutes or less. 'Love Story' I wrote on my bedroom floor in about 20 minutes. When I get on a roll with something, it's really hard for me to put it down unfinished.  From "10 Questions For Taylor Swift." [Time]
• "I don't even know what 'tweeting' means ... but it sounds dirty!"  Michelle Trachtenberg. [Gatecrasher]

• Has Britney Spears "fallen" for her backup dancer, Chase Benz?

A source says: "Brit really loves the way Chase looks, and she has a thing for Southern boys with loads of charm. She's totally into him. And being on tour again, plus having a sexy new guy to get close to, has put Brit in a great frame of mind." And that metal codpiece is just a bonus! [Daily Mail]

• Chris Brown denies that he has a new girlfriend. A source says that he and the lady in question "met recently. They're friends. That's it." [People]
• Amy Winehouse heard that hubs Blake Fielder-Civil got some other woman pregnant, and she is working on a song about it! The tune, called "The Ultimate Betrayal," goes: "Blake a baby, no, no, no." A source says, "It's very haunting." And by that you mean familiar and repetitive? [The Sun]
• This story seems mildly preposterous but here it is: John Mayer used to tell Jessica Simpson: "I'm really attracted to your spiritual side." A source says: "He'd tell her that every time she opened her mouth to speak. It was a nice way of basically saying, 'Just sit there and be pretty, and don't ruin it with talk.' The sad thing is she started to tell people, 'I'm working on being more spiritual,' and then just sit there quietly." [Page Six]
• In a Vanity Fair poll, 58% of respondents named Angelina Jolie "the most beautiful woman in the world." Gisele was a distant second with 9% of the vote. And what is the point of pitting women to compete against each other in a completely subjective competition again? [MSNBC Scoop]
• Madonna's former nanny was on Australian TV saying things like Madonna is a "fantastic mother" and so this column wonders if she is still on the payroll. [MSNBC]
• Apparently Lil' Kim's top nearly dropped on during a jive on Dancing With The Stars; she told a reporter after the show: "I don't know why this happens a lot of the time, but ... the girls were tryin' to come out." [AP]
• Deaf actress Marlee Matlin spoke to Joy Behar about sexual abuse, drugs and her volatile relationship with actor William Hurt; the transcript is up. She was molested by a babysitter at age 11; she was molested again by a teacher at age 14 and of her relationship with William Hurt, she says, "there was violence." [CNN]
• Meryl Streep plays Julia Child in the new flick Julie & Julia, but how did the 5 foot 6 actress play the 6 foot 2 chef? "Meryl believed that in order to capture the essence of the character, you had to believe Julia Child is 6-foot-2," says writer/director Nora Ephron. "Actually, our ambitions were more modest. We made her 6 feet. We used a whole bunch of fabulous tricks. Everything we could think of. Ann Roth did amazing things with costumes." [USA Today]
• Former Fugees star Wyclef Jean was the target of an assassination plot in Haiti. "They had a plot to assassinate me, but it obviously didn't go down. I take what I do very seriously, but I fear nothing... except my mamma." [Daily Express]
• Eminem's path back to the spotlight continues: He'll perform at the MTV Movie Awards next month. [UPI]
• Zac Efron is super adorbs on the cover of GQ, and inside he talks about getting advice from Leonardo DiCaprio: "He said, 'There's one way that you can really fuck this all up. Just do heroin.'" [People]
• Goop poop: Gwyneth Paltrow wants another baby. "At first I thought 'OK, that's it, I'm done, no way will I have more.' Then my son turned two and you think, 'Oh, I don't want this to be the last two-year-old I have. Maybe I'll do one more." The real question is, what will she name the sibling of Apple and Moses? Eden? Plum? Cain? Abel? Jesus? [The Sun]
• By the by, Gwyneth threw Moses a superhero-themed party in Los Angeles over the weekend. [Mirror]
• Guess who else wants another kid? Jessica Alba. We know this because she was shopping for real estate with her husband and wanted a place big enough for another baby. Says a source. [Ok!]
• Real Housewife LuAnn De Lesseps has been invited by Judge Lynn Toler to appear on Divorce Court. Is it classy enough for the Countess? [NY Daily News]
• ANTM hottie Nigel Barker wants you to know about baby seals being clubbed to death in Canada: "It's not a hunt, it's a massacre on the ice. Its barbaric." [NY Post]
• In this video, Hugh Jackman and Daniel Henney woo ladies on a Korean TV show in the most hilarious ways. [YouTube]
• After the director of the brand made what Jay-Z thought was a racist remark, Jay started boycotting Cristal and supporting Armand de Brignac champagne instead. Now Armand De Brignac is selling out its entire production run of 60,000 bottles. [Independent]
• Oooh: Lily Allen was the secret voice of Atomic Kitten, when she was 14 years old. [The Sun]
• Your friend Kanye West was supposed to be arraigned on misdemeanor charges  he's accused of breaking a paparazzo's flash last September  but his court date has been delayed until May. [Yahoo News via AP]
• Mel Gibson was heard telling people at the Roman Catholic church he had built in 2005: "Well, she's filed for divorce." [People]
• Jamie Foxx's Sirius radio show, The Foxxhole, spent a good minute and a half making fun of Miley Cyrus, calling her "that little white bitch," "the one with all the gums," who needs to "get like Britney Spears and do some heroin" or "go get chlamydia from a bicycle seat." Charming. [Perez]
• Prince William made a mistake in a £1 million Royal Airforce plane during training  flipping the wrong switch and "overcooking" the engine  but apparently the plane is fine and the prince is fine and everything is fine. [Daily Mail]
• Not that you care, but Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo are on the rocks and argue all the time. [Gatecrasher]
• Jenna Jameson has blogged about giving birth to her twins, Jesse Jameson and Journey Jette. She says: "I truly believe the 500 sit ups a day paid off. I was able to push my 5 pound Jesse out in 5 pushes." [ONTD]
• Lost star Josh Holloway and wife Yessica are the proud new parents of a baby girl named Java Kumala Holloway. [People]
• Animal guy Jeff Corwin is getting a show on the Food Network. He'll travel the world, meet with natives, sample "exotic" foods and learn about local customs. Kind of like Anthony Bourdain does? [EW]
• Is it the hair, the eyes or the mouth that make Phil Spector's mug shot so creepy? [TMZ]
• The high school in Kalama, Washington which was used in the filming of Twilight has become a tourist attraction. Fans have come from as far as Germany to visit the parking lot. What a world. [AP]
• The late George Harrison of the Beatles will get a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. [Mirror]
• Blind item! "Which young songbird not only had lipo on her stomach, but even got the "back fat" sucked out from under her bra line?" [Gatecrasher]
• "You haven't responded to my emails, phone calls and text messages. You say you look at my website, so I'm trying to reach you that way. I want to see you and your family – in private, like the 'normal family' you say always wanted."  Candy Spelling, to Tori Spelling, on CandySpelling.com. [People]
• "I hate the internet. I find it dehumanising to constantly check emails or social sites which have become so fashionable. I'm not a celebrity. I don't go home or out with friends saying I'm a celebrity and I don't ask to be treated like a queen. Mum and dad wouldn't like that."  Keira Knightley. [The Sun]
• "I wasn't programmed by Disney. It's common sense. If you're gonna be drunk with your friends, don't get wasted at the Chateau Marmont and hook up with some famous chick. It's not rocket science."  Zac Efron. [People]
• "I like going to England. Women in England are really racy. Very very  uh  very fast. Very very nice. I like it."  Danny DeVito. [Mirror]
• "The movie poster should say, 'Starring Meryl Streep, Amy Adams and boeuf bourguignon.' My car crashes are burnt stews. You cannot begin to imagine how much eating there was, how much food. There was a huge kitchen on a soundstage with two fantastic people in it. Whenever a dish had to be made for the movie, they had to do at least seven of them. And there were always several left over."  Nora Ephron, on her new movie about Julia Child, Julie & Julia. [USA Today]
• "Age holds absolutely no fear for me. There is so much enjoyment ahead. Sophia [Loren] is 74 and amazing – every time I talk to her, she's full of wonderful stories about old actors."  Penelope Cruz. [People]
• "It's all about a woman's reproductive cycle and how we become fertile in terms of bearing children at a young age and then at a certain point in life we are no longer fertile in that sense. I think women can be at their most creative, their most dynamic, when their biological fertility cycle is over. So that's basically what that's all about. Just when I thought it's all over for me, I find myself in the most exciting, creative time of my entire life."  Kathie Lee Gifford, on her new book, Just When I Thought I'd Dropped My Last Egg. [Time]

Prince William gave the interview to help raise money for a new children's cancer wing at the Royal Marsden Hospital in London. In the clip at left, William talks to Alice Marples, a cancer patient at the hospital, at Clarence House, his father's London residence. William says that if he could make himself invisible (not unlike the boy wizard) he would go to a newspaper office and "hide in the background and listen to all the stories they talk about me."

• Kanye West has been charged with battery, theft and vandalism stemming from that incident last September in which he smashed a paparazzi's camera at LAX. He's planning a fly courtroom outfit right now. [TMZ, Mirror, Gatecrasher]

• Here is piece about Natasha Richardson's life and death, including who visited her before she was taken off of life support (Joan Didion; Meryl Streep.) [NY Post]
• Vanessa Redgrave, Natasha Richardson's mother, played Joan Didion on Broadway, and the play was about losing a daughter. [Fox 411]
• Rihanna's "mentor" (?), producer Evan Rogers, says all the attention from Oprah and Tyra Banks makes matters worse: "I think that everyone has good intentions and means well, but it turns up the heat in terms of it seeming like the whole world is telling her what to do." Eh, she needs to listen. [MSNBC]
• Rihanna's car was pulled over last night in Hollywood for having tinted windows and no front license plate. She was in the backseat, not driving. [TMZ]
• A judge has issued a restraining order against Britney's ex, Adnan Ghalib. It's in effect until 2012, and there's no way he can wait that long. [NY Post]
• Uh-oh: Jessica Lange fell in her home, suffering a broken collarbone and a small cut on her forehead. Be well! [Daily Mail]
• Oh snap! LeAnn Rimes is not denying that she's having an affair with Eddie Cibrian, (as noted in Midweek Madness.) She says, "This is a difficult time for me and my loved ones." [NY Daily News]
• Jason Segel brought a date to the premiere party of I Love You, Man and she passed out by the pool and had to be carried out on a stretcher. Must have been an awesome bash! [Page Six]
• Katie Holmes: Not on a special Scientology diet; not pregnant. Despite everything we've heard. [E!]
• Sad face: One of Oprah's cocker spaniel puppies died and the other one is sick. Sadie the puppy is fighting a life-threatening disease called parvovirus. Hope she pulls through! [NY Daily News]
• Shocker: "Kate Moss Parties For The Third Night In A Row." [Daily Mail]
• Prince William has a "Harry Potter scar" but no magical abilities, as far as we know. [Yahoo News via AFP]
• Here is a picture of Gwyneth Paltrow picking off of Madonna's plate. [Janet Charlton's Hollywood]
• Some phone billionaire paid Leona Lewis £1 million to sing at his daughter's 21st birthday party. In this economy! [Telegraph]
• The Colbert Report will spend a week taping on a USO tour in the Persian Gulf; Comedy Central is claiming this is the first TV series to shoot more than ep in a combat zone. Colbert says: "I can't tell you where I'm going, but the fact that I can't tell you where I'm going should tell you where I'm going." [Variety]
• Did Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell kiss?!!?!?! [E!]
• More rumors about Liz Hurley's marriage: "He keeps flying off to India. There's no sign of that longed-for baby. And gossips whisper about her terrible temper..." [Daily Mail]
• Gossip Girl spinoff news: Josh Schwartz says the new show will focus on Lily, played by Brittany Snow. "Brittany and Krysten Ritter have amazing chemistry as these mismatched sisters and Andrew McCarthy plays their father, which is incredible. We also got No Doubt to record a cover of Adam and the Ants' 'Stand and Deliver' for the show. They're going on tour and they don't have an album, so this is the only new song that they've done. They performed it on the show and everybody, Gwen [Stefani] and the band, were just super into it." [E!]
• As previously posted, Project Runway's Kenley Collins assaulted her now ex-fiancé with a cat yesterday and was arrested. She says: "It was a miscommunication. Fights happen, and that's that." But… what about the cat?!?! She also threw her laptop and three apples at the dude. [NY Post]
• Taylor Momsen tops this list of "Worst Celebrity Mullets." [ONTD]
• You know what's cool? How the new Real Housewives Of New Jersey  Italian ladies with mob ties  isn't stereotypical. At all. [NY Post, NY Daily News]
• Girls have "figured out his schedule" and are now stalking James Franco outside of his classes at Columbia University. At least they're learning something? [Page Six]
• Are the final four American Idol contestants already chosen? [E!]
• Kate Bosworth is single again; she dumped hot boyfriend James Rousseau. [Star]
• A folk singer is accusing Lil Wayne of copyright infringement. What a world. [NY Daily News]
• Alex Rodriguez is suing over a real estate deal. [TMZ]
• Chow Yun Fat will play Confucius in a new film, which is a pretty big deal, no? [Yahoo News via AFP]
• Thank Zeus: VH1 is bringing back Behind The Music. Lil Wayne and Scott Weiland have signed on; expect sex and drugs and drama! [Yahoo News via Hollywood Reporter]
• Actor Stacy Keach was hospitalized Tuesday after suffering a mild stroke. [Variety]
• "She was a wonderful woman and actress and treated me like I was her own. I didn't see much of her over the years but I will miss her. My heart goes out to her family. This is a tragic loss."  Lindsay Lohan on Natasha Richardson, who played her mother in The Parent Trap. [E!]
• "It was my responsibility as a kid to regulate her pills. I remember sitting in hotel rooms, opening capsules, emptying out the drugs and filling the capsules with sugar…I was taught to never, ever call an ambulance, no matter what happened. I was to call my father or someone else never an ambulance because it would get into the press. I was taught at a young age to lie, to deceive, to manipulate."  Lorna Luft, on her mother, Judy Garland. [Page Six]
• "He's been in touch a little. The apologies come, and he was like, 'I made a big mistake.' And I'm like, 'Yeah, yeah, I know. Go ahead and say what you need to say to feel better and to sleep at night.'"  Dita Von Teese on Marilyn Manson, to Inked magazine. [Page Six]
• "When I got the call, I was playing pool with Scott. I remember picking up the phone and someone started asking me how the Veterans Day parade was. At first I didn't even recognize who it was, but it was my brother. He just sounded so down in the dumps, I had never heard him like that! He told me he got the letter I'd been dreading and everything just changed. My mind was going a mile a minute. Everything disappeared, Scott, the cameras, I was just absorbed in that phone call. At first I wanted so bad for my brother to say he was joking, but he wasn't."  Ryan Conklin, of The Real World, who was called back to serve in Iraq. [LA Times]
• "When me and my dad played pool, he'd always beat me. I'd like be putting 'em quickly. But he'd be really slow and methodical and then just wait for me to mess up. And as soon as I did, he'd be like this [swishing noise]. So when I decided to take that method, and really take my time and take one careful shot, I'd always beat him. Always. I just know now that if you take your time with something, things just seem to work out best."  Idris Elba. [USA Today]

• Leighton Meester and Blake Lively share an ice cream cone on Rolling Stone's new cover. The girl-on-girl antics continue inside, with the girls sucking on a Twizzler and each other's thumbs.

• The rest of the Gossip Girl cast gets away with having a clothed pillow fight and cuddling in bed together. [Gothamist, Rolling Stone]
• New York Magazine points out that they've already photographed the cast in a big white bed together (and done it better). [NY Magazine]
• Love lockdown! Kanye West has been charged with misdemeanor battery, grand theft and vandalism over destroying a paparazzo's camera on video at LAX in September. [AP]
• Liz Smith says she was told Natasha Richardson is "dead". Though that hasn't been confirmed, Smith says moving her to Lenox Hill was a bad sign and that, earlier this afternoon, she was taken off life support. An insider says: "Nobody goes to Lenox Hill who is really sick; if she'd had a chance to live, they'd have found another great brain hospital!" [Wowowow]
• Supposedly medics on the ambulance that transported Natasha Richardson said she was brain dead. A source said she was "unconscious," her pupils "non-reactive," her skin was "pale" and she was suffering from "major head trauma." Liam Neeson reportedly held her hand the entire time and caressed her face during the ride. [TMZ]
• Subscribers will get a copy of Entertainment Weekly with Paul Rudd on the cover, but the mag put Natasha Richardson on the cover being sold on newsstands. [ONTD]
• A judge has ordered Adnan Ghalib to stay away from Britney Spears for three years. [TMZ]
• Is Bruce Willis marrying his girlfriend, model Emma Heming? The National Enquirer says the wedding is going down this weekend in some "exotic location." [Perez Hilton]
• Eddie Cibrian is denying the rumors that he's having an affair with LeAnn Rimes. Supposedly he told a friend: "LeAnn and I are friends, we went to dinner, that's it. The most ridiculous thing is that people believe I would do something like this period … much less do it in a public place. The false accusations are obviously causing a rift at home, but me and my family will get through this together." The security camera photos printed in Star today (which you can read about in Midweek Madness) paint a different picture. [Perez Hilton]
• LeAnn Rimes issued a statement on her website and she isn't denying the affair. She writes: "This is a difficult time for me and my loved ones, but I appreciate all your continued support.
  I would like to assure all of you that this is a place for you to hear things directly from me and as you all know, not everything in our lives is always black and white." [Perez Hilton]
• Dean Sheremet, LeAnn Rimes' husband, Twittered today, "I love my wife!!!" [Perez Hilton]
• John Mayer isn't writing a tell all book about Jennifer Aniston, as the cover of Star Magazine claims. Mayer's rep says: "Even for them, its a new low. They've dressed themselves up but they're no better than the Enquirer. Despite their low standards it's still not ok to make up stories and print them. Unfortunately, while we're considering legal action, Star Magazine is already at work on next week's cover story about some reality tv star's secret marriage to Elvis." [Perez Hilton]
• A remake of the film Arthur is in the works and producers want Russell Brand to play the title role with Sir Anthony Hopkins as his wise-cracking butler. [The Daily Express]
• Sean Stewart, son of Rod Stewart and Celebrity Rehab cast member, appeared on Judge Jeanine Pirro and said his dad is "very cheap." [The Daily Mail]
• Jessica Lange fell yesterday at her Minnesota cabin. She grabbed for a railing that was not secure and fell over, breaking her shoulder and collarbone and dislocating her arm. She received treatment at a local hospital. [TMZ]
• Pink and husband Carey Hart are indeed back on. They were seen exiting her tour bus together in Berlin. [Perez Hilton]
• Andrew Morton says that the drama surrounding whether or not Prince William is engaged to Kate Middleton has a decidedly retro feel. He writes: "Whatever becomes of Kate Middleton, she will always be marked by the man she knew rather than what she knows. If Michelle Obama seems the acme of social modernity and progress, the romance of Kate and William harks back to another arcane era." [The Daily Beast]
• When asked if she plans to have more kids, Jennifer Lopez said, "Let me work just a little bit first. Let me get a couple things out there... one song, one movie, something ... I like [need] to recuperate." [The Star]
• Eric Nies from the first Real World: New York spotted a puppy drowning and stripped naked to jump in the partially frozen lake and save the dog. There are pictures. [TMZ]
• In this video Martha Stewart says she still isn't coping with the loss of her dog Ghenghis Khan in a freak propane tank explosion last week. [TMZ]
• Audrina Patridge is getting her very own Hills spinoff. [Perez Hilton]
• Designing Women is coming out on DVD. [Entertainment Weekly]
• Heavily pregnant PETA members posed naked in cages to protest against chef Jaime Oliver, who urged people to buy British pork rather than pork raised overseas under worse conditions. Oliver's rep says he's a big supporter of animal welfare and his restaurants serve pork from "the happiest pigs you can get." Peta representatives say: "The answer to saving pigs is not to buy British pork, it's to go vegetarian." [The Telegraph]
• Brad Pitt and Natalie Portman will star in a film adaptation of the book Important Artifacts and Personal Property from the Collection of Lenore Doolan and Harold Morris, Including Books, Street Fashion, and Jewelry The book looks like a Sotheby's estate auction catalog, with 325 entries and photographs of items that tell the story of the relationship between a fictitious a 40ish photographer (Pitt) and a New York Times food columnist in her late 20s (Portman). [Variety]
• Everyone is angry that British tabloid OK! put out a tribute to dying reality star Jade Goody even though she's still alive - except Jade. The magazine put out a statement saying: "Jade's family have spoken to OK! today to reiterate that they understand the tribute issue and view it as being very kind to Jade." [The Mirror]
• Kim Kardashian is one the cover of Russian Playboy. [The Sun]
• Um, here are the NSFW photos of Kim Kardashian from inside Russian Playboy. [ONTD]
• Robert Pattinson says that even before he started acting he always thought he was a fraud and was faking his emotions. He says: "I remember when I was a teenager thinking my girlfriend was cheating on me, and going around riling myself up. Pretending to cry. It was totally illegitimate-I actually didn't feel anything. I went to some pub and then went crying all the way home. And I got into my dog's bed. I was crying and holding on to the dog. I woke up in the morning, and the dog was looking at me like, ‘You're a fake.' ... I thought I'd seen her with another guy, but she wasn't even there. I spent three days apologizing to the dog." [GQ]
• Prince Williams went on a U.K. children's show and said his patronage of London's Royal Marsden Hospital is something that would make mom proud. "For a very long time my mother was involved with the Royal Marsden, and she had a very close connection with them ... So I wanted to follow in her footsteps, in that sense, and help." Diana opened the children's unit in 1993 and Prince William is supporting the building of a Children's and Teenage Cancer Centre. [People]
• Michael Sheen, who played Tony Blair in The Queen and David Frost in Frost/Nixon says playing so many real people has taken its toll. "Have I got an identity crisis? Yeah, I don't know who I am really. You give me a script and then, I'm that," said Sheen. [The Star]
• 50 Cent has a backhanded compliment for Sean Combs in King magazine. He says: "Puffy has the best model for staying relevant, because [he does it] without a song. He's been able to maintain an interest and stay in a space to executive produce television and film projects, and stay relevant to hip-hop culture. What was the last record that made you feel like, ‘Oh, my God, Puffy is on fire'? You don't need it. That's what makes his business model exciting to me." [Perez Hilton]

• John Mayer did not, repeat did not buy an engagement ring for Jennifer Aniston. [Us Magazine]

• In fact: John Mayer and Jennifer Aniston may have broken up. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Brad Pitt: Considering public office? [Variety]
• Chris Brown pulled out of the Kids' Choice Awards of his own accord; Nickelodeon didn't make the decision. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Chris Brown is firing his manager and looking for a "whole new team." An insider claims he wanted to apologize for the beating earlier and was advised not to… [Page Six]
• Rihanna went out clubbing in West Hollywood Tuesday night. [Concrete Loop]
• "Julia was all smiles for fans and stopped to do a few autographs, but as soon as she stepped inside the cinema her mood changed. She shouted at photographers to leave her alone then asked staff to bring her a glass of champagne before she would answer any questions."  From a spywitness report on Julia Roberts' behavior at the Duplicty premiere in London. [The Sun]
• Here, Julia Roberts dishes on 10 of her favorite leading men. [EW]
• A French "society" magazine is reporting that Prince William will marry Kate Middleton this summer. ZOMG royal wedding askjdkfflasjdk!!! [Daily Mail]
• A hospital official inspected Nadya Suleman's new house yesterday, to insure that it is safe for the octuplets. The babies will be released, two at a time, any day now. [E!]
• Noted marijuana enthusiast Michael Phelps has been interviewed by Matt Lauer; look for footage on the Today show on Friday and Sunday on Dateline. [ET]
• Jesus Luz is back in Rio. He claims he has "always" been interested in kabbalah, before ever meeting Madonna. He's going to be in Brazil for a month while waiting for his work visa, then back to New York! [Made In Brazil]
• Madonna and Guy Ritchie have come to a custody agreement regarding the kids: Rocco and David will live with Madge but guy will get regular visits and see the children in the UK during the holidays. [The Sun]
• If you miss Project Runway, Heidi Klum thinks you should do something about it: "I think that people should be demonstrating outside of [company co-chairman] Harvey Weinstein's house. If it were up to me, it would be on by now." [MSNBC]
• Prince has decided that Prince will appear on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno four times, coinciding with the release of Prince's albums, LotUSFLOW3R and MPLSoUND. Oh, and also coinciding with the last time Leno hosts. [ET]
• Ricky Gervais to appear on the finale episode of The Office? [Mirror]
• Early buzz on Sacha Baron Cohen's new flick, Bruno: "Shocking, jaw-dropping and TOTALLY FUCKING HILARIOUS." [Mother Jones]
• Joaquin Phoenix was rapping at a Miami Beach nightclub when someone in the audience started heckling him, so naturally he jumped into the crowd and had some sort of confrontation before being dragged away by security guards. Did Casey Affleck get the whole thing on video? Yes, yes he did. [Yahoo News via AP, Daily Mail]
• Mickey Rourke will be the Russian villain in Iron Man 2. [Deadline Hollywood]
• Jennifer Saunders and Dawn French spoofed Mamma Mia for Comic Relief and Sienna Miller played the Amanda Seyfried role. Click for the photo, which in itself is funny. [Daily Mail]
• Geri Halliwell dumped her fiancé, but he'd done an interview with an Italian magazine the same day  in which he talked about how much she's "changed his life." Awkward! [The Sun]
• The guy who owns the Beverly Hills mansion where MTV shot the Live From The Hills Season finale says the production company trashed his house. The damage? $158,250.07. Please don't forget the seven cents. [TMZ]
• Balthazar Getty, who recently left Brothers & Sisters, will guest star on an episode of Medium. At least he's working? [EW]
• Kiefer Sutherland used to babysit Gwyneth Paltrow. True story. [The Star]
• 50 Cent and Rick Ross are in a feud and Fiddy's latest move is to release a porn tape featuring Ross's former girlfriend. Classy! [TMZ]
• Lance Bass is a matchmaker. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Jada Pinkett Smith's school is now open, and accepting kids pre-K through sixth grade. Does it have ties with Scientology, you ask? Well, the "study technology" is that developed by L. Ron Hubbard. Pinkett Smith says the school stresses "100 per cent mastery," encouraging students to retake exams until they score 100 per cent. Fun? [Yahoo News via AP]
• Shannen Doherty will return to 90210 for the season finale, if you care. [E!]
• Ashley Jensen is definitely leaving Ugly Betty, because she just got cast as a regular on a new CBS show, Accidentally On Purpose. That's the one where Jenna Elfman plays a movie critic who finds herself "accidentally" knocked up after a fling with a younger man. [EW]
• Beck is playing a charity show tonight, with proceeds going to Educating Children International. Turns out that's a Scientology organization. If you feel icky inside, you're not the only one. [LA Times]
• Jack White of the White Stripes and the Raconteurs has a third band, the Dead Weather. The new group includes Alison Mosshart of The Kills, Dean Fertita of Queens of the Stone Age and Jack Lawrence of The Greenhornes. Album drops in June. [USA Today]
• Handsome devil Chris Cornell has a new album, produced by  wait for it  Timbaland. [Yahoo news via AP]
• Dr. Phil's wife promised some skin care company she'd get them on her husband's show. The company was so psyched, they spent $650,000 on stuff the public would surely be clamoring for. Except the products never made it to the show. So the company is suing. [TMZ]
• Kathy Griffin was booed off the stage at the Apollo Theater in Harlem. [Village Voice]
• Al Reynolds is not getting a reality show, even though he wants one. [Extra]
• If you remember the '90s, then you may remember blond bro rockers Nelson. Well Matthew is getting divorced and asking his wife for spousal support. Yeah. [TMZ]
• Blind item: "Which newly engaged lesbian would be horrified to discover her main squeeze has been sleeping around ... with men?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I've come into my own head a little bit really, being a bit more honest and open, rather than hiding in a crack pipe or wherever and just not turning up most of the time."  Pete Doherty. [The Sun]
• "Artemis has a few really great lines because she plays everything – even the humor – very straight. The one that made me laugh out loud when I read it was when she tells Hippolyta that they shouldn't have let Diana go out into the outside world. Hippolyta asks, 'What could we have done to have stopped her?' And Artemis says, 'Well I could have shot her in the leg with an arrow. Not in an artery, of course.' It's just so deadpan – she wouldn't kill her, but she would've shot her. It's so dry, and it's so honest. And I love that."  Rosario Dawson, on her role in Wonder Woman. [Toon Zone News]
• "It's amazing to me that the tabloids such as the National Enquirer print such negative stories about me and my health when there are so many positive things going on in my life right now. I've started a new chemotherapy and, once again, I am one of the lucky ones with pancreatic cancer that is responding well to the treatment."  Patrick Swayze, who denies he has reached "the end." [People]
• "I'm not quite sure why, but the strongest female characters I've found have predominantly been in period films, more than in modern-day films. At least with the stuff that's been sent to me. I love watching period movies because I think that watching films is about escapism and about fantasy and I find it easier to dive into a fantasy that I don't know anything about, you know, that I don't live day to day. I love that feeling of escapism that period films give me, and that books about different times give me, or paintings give me. But I wasn't setting out to go, 'OK, I'm only going to do period films.' I work in a very instinctual way and I respond to certain things and I have no idea why, but for some reason the last couple of films have all been period."  Keira Knightley, whose new film, Edge Of Love, is set in the 1940s and depicts the poet Dylan Thomas. [Salon]
• "You know, the company that financed this film, they came to me about two weeks before we started filming and said watch out for Malkovich, he's a badass, he will fuck you - I don't know if I'm allowed to curse - he will really, you know, ride a director into the ground. And then he showed up and he was nice and cool and funny and sweet and I never had a single problem. Kind of disappointing; I almost wish that at some point he had really let me have it, but he never did."  Director Sean McGinley, on John Malkovich. [New York Mag]
• "I hate all that calorie counting. I eat what I want and then if my weight starts to go up, I cut back. Of course, I've aged a bit in the face, but not enough to worry about it. I have common sense enough to know that if I'm nearly 70, something has to happen."  Tina Turner. [Daily Mail]

[London, February 24. Image via Getty]

• So much Oscar gossip! For instance:

Amanda Seyfried got her heel caught in a stocking during the song and dance number. Zac Efron's microphone got tangled in his bow tie. We'll never be invited back," Zac joked. Alicia Keys broke a heel; Goldie Hawn snuck in the back where "no one's screaming." Jennifer Aniston was heard whispering to John Mayer: "I really love you, every part of you." [AP]

• On the red carpet, Mickey Rourke told a reporter: "I said to myself, 'I would rather have Loki for another two years than have an Oscar,' and I told her that, you know. But she stayed as long as she could." [E!]
• Mickey Rourke maybe tried to grope Jessica Alba, who "jumped back and made a disgusted face." [Gatecrasher]
• On the red carpet, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt snubbed Ryan Seacrest. Again. [NY Daily News]
• Kate Winslet on the red carpet: "I said to my daughter, 'If I did win the big prize, what do you think I should say?' And she said, 'I just think you should be really crazy and emotional'. I thought, 'You're no good.'" [E!]
• Kate Winslet doesn't want to see Angelina Jolie naked. [E!]
• Robert Pattinson on the red carpet: "I did a rehearsal and messed it up. I am probably going to be the letdown of the entire show." Uh, yeah. You're the let down of the entire show. The Oscars hinge on a sparkly vampire. [E!]
• Did you know that Oscar winners are obliged to sign winners' agreements? The agreements say if they or their heirs ever decide to part ways with their Oscars, they must offer to sell the awards back to the Academy for $1 each. Matilda Ledger will have to sign this when she turns 18, apparently. [E!]
• A review of the show: "Hugh Jackman a winner but production was a lost cause." [NY Daily News]
• Harvey Weinstein had a party Saturday night and everyone was there: Robert DeNiro, Leonardo DiCaprio, Jennifer Lopez, Jessica Alba, and Miss Lindsay Lohan, who showed up with a guy who owns local luxury car dealerships. [Fox 411]
• Katie "Jordan" Price attended Elton John's Oscar party, and her "rival," Victoria Beckham, was there. No showcase showdown occurred. [Daily Mail]
• An insider on Rachel Zoe: "Her television career is interfering with her styling work. Clients are getting very upset." This is why she was seen "flipping out over the phone and screaming at the top of her lungs" at the Weinstein pre-Oscar party. [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which married Oscar nominee has been cheating on his wife with a hard-partying starlet?" [Gatecrasher]
• Jennifer Aniston didn't run into Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie at the Dreamworks Oscar bash  because they didn't show up! [Gatecrasher]
• Penelope Cruz and Tom Cruise did run into each other at an Oscar party. "Penelope tapped him on the shoulder and timidly asked, 'Tom?' Tom turned around, got visibly flustered and awkwardly said, 'Oh, hey. Hi,' and gave her a small, distant hug before turning back around to his friends. It was weird." [Perez]
• Here's a rundown of all the Oscar winners. [NY Post]
• Meanwhile, Chris Brown called Rihanna to wish her a happy birthday. He also sent her a diamond bracelet and necklace, as well as an iPod Touch. Friday night, Rihanna had a birthday party that was Blackjack-themed (Chris was not there) and then jetted off to Barbados. [Gatecrasher]
• What the fuck is up with CNN anchor Kiran Chetry saying that Rihanna will have to deal with the "stigma" of being an abuse victim? Writes Barbara Morrill: "Do we use such terminology about victims in a robbery? When a man beats up another man?" Some dude says, "She'll be remembered for this, rather than her own talents." This is not right. [Daily Kos]
• Amy Winehouse stays busy: Now she's accused of splitting up a lesbian couple. An unnamed woman claims she found her girlfriend in bed with Amy Winehouse, and that Amy asked if she wanted to join. This woman changed her MySpace profile to read: "Amy Winehouse asked me for a threesome and I said no, no, no." [Mirror]
• George Clooney is in Darfur, but the United Nations is pulling his security escort, since he has been speaking out on the troubles in the area. Please Cloons, be careful! [Daily Express]
• Nicholas Kristof says he and George Clooney are bunking in a tiny room in a guest house and "George's side of the room has a big splotch of something that sure looks like blood." [NY Times]
• Speaking of putting yourself in harm's way, T-Pain has canceled a concert in Guyana after "credible death and kidnapping threats." Someone doesn't like Auto-Tune! [E!]
• Oooh, will Michelle Obama be on the first non-Oprah cover of O magazine? [Liz Smith]
• Harlow Madden will be a big sister! Nicole Richie is pregnant again. [ONTD]
• Guy Ritchie might be dating a film producer on his Sherlock Holmes film, or just, you know, hanging out with a coworker. [Daily Mail]
• Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony threw a birthday party for their 1-year-old twins on Saturday in the backyard at their home in Bel Air. A clown was involved. [People]
• Cruz Beckham's birthday looks awesome: He turned four, while dressed as Wolverine, at the Xtreme Martial Arts World Headquarters in Hollywood. Eva Longoria and nieces attended! [Daily Mail]
• During his speech at the Independent Spirit Awards, Mickey Rourke said Eric Roberts "is the fucking man and he deserves another chance." No one seems sure why he felt the need to make this point. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Prince Harry and Natalie Imbruglia: Flirting via text message? [Daily Mail]
• Meanwhile, in a new documentary, a journalist says of Prince William: "He's doing almost nothing. I'm sorry, but as second in line of succession to the throne, he really should be doing more." [Telegraph]
• In this video, Rosario Dawson talks about her mother licking her in public. Yeah. She's traumatized by spit. There's more, about lesbians/sex/virginity. [NY Times]
• Slade Smiley, from Real Housewives Of Orange County, has been arrested. It's a civil contempt charge. [UPI]
• Al Pacino will play Salvador Dali in a new film; but not the same one in which Antonio Banderas will play Dali or the one in which Robert Pattinson plays Dali. Who will be more surreal? [Daily Express]
• Freida Pinto's ex is still talking about how Slumdog Millionaire wrecked their relationship, and how upset he is that Freida is getting close to Dev Patel: "Now everywhere I go I see them on billboards. I am devastated." This is from the paper that loves to shame women, don't forget. [Daily Mail]
• By the by, Salman Rushdie hated Slumdog, saying it "piles impossibility on impossibility." [AP]
• Bruce Springsteen will headline this summer's Glastonbury festival, bringing "Born In The USA" to the UK. [Telegraph]
• Is Michael Jackson making a comeback? He's reportedly in talks to do 30 live shows in London or Las Vegas later this year. Then again, a couple of weeks ago, he was reportedly dying. [NY Daily News]
• In this Q&A, Matt Groening talks about changing the main titles of The Simpsons: "We're always throwing in what we call Black Bart gags, where Bart is writing on the blackboard, and we switch little things around. Lisa's saxophone solo switches." [NY Post]
• Richard Gere and his wife have opened up an inn. They are innkeepers now. Do with this what you will. [NY Mag]
• The creative director and global business strategist of INXS, Chris Murphy, swears they did not dump their lead singer JD Fortune from the band in the middle of a busy airport. [News.com.au]
• Debbie Gibson's house in the Hollywood Hills is for sale and photos reveal that there is a mirrored piano in the living room and a 7-up can by the bathroom sink. [The Real Estalker]
• Charlie Sheen and wife Brooke had a sports-themed baby shower, if you care. [People]
• "I've been through a lot. I can't sleep, sometimes I wake up at night. I still see him."  Housekeeper Teresa Solomon, who found Heath Ledger dead more than a year ago. [News.com.au]
• "My intention is to be Prime Minister of Canada, not Governor General, which is mainly a ceremonial position."  William Shatner. [PR-Inside]
• "Some beautiful women are passive in the bedroom. They're gorgeous, they know they're gorgeous and they don't feel the need to do anything beyond being gorgeous. Elizabeth Taylor was not one of those women. Being with her was like sticking an eggbeater in your brain."  from an essay by Robert Wagner. [Daily Mail]
• "There's a lot of gay people that dress better than me… No, I just think it's a stereotype that all gay people dress good, and then it's also a stereotype that if you dress good, you're gay."  Kanye West. [NY Mag]
• "I think about it; because I am effeminate I've always thought about it, 'Am I gay?' And then, I so love being with women, and I so love women's bodies and all that. I think, well no, I can't be. But sometimes I think it would just be simpler if I was, because everyone thinks I am. I'm quite camp, but no, I don't think I am. If I was gay, I would just get on with it. But definitely I love women, I love being around women, I find them incredible and intoxicating, and I've never had that feeling I get with women with a man."  David Walliams of Little Britain. [Guardian]
• "From the first day I met her, she said, 'I want us to be friends and I want you to know that you are a huge part of our family and are welcome any time.' She has been as good as her word. Dad and I have had our ups and downs over the years but Catherine is someone who has cemented the family together. She and Dad were in Los Angeles two weeks ago because he got some sort of lifetime achievement award and we all went out to dinner. I've never seen my father as happy as he is with her. It's cool to see."  Cameron Douglas on Catherine Zeta-Jones being good for his dad, Michael Douglas. [Daily Mail]
• "It's always great to rehearse on a plane, because people think you're mad… Emotionality is really easy for me. My father always said that Fondas can cry at a good steak. And so on a personal and professional level it's great for me not to have to do that."  Jane Fonda , 71 (?!?) on her role in Broadway show 33 Variations. (The show is being protested by Vietnam vets.) [NY Times, UPI]
• "I have decided to freeze myself when I die. You know, cryonics. You pay a lot of money and you get stuck in a deep freeze once you've been declared dead. Medical science is bound to work out a way of bringing us back to life in the next century or so, and I want to be available when they do. I would be doing the nation an invaluable service."  Simon Cowell. [Daily Mail]
• "[Partying] is what I do for a living. I get paid to go to events and parties, and it's fun."  Paris Hilton. [Gatecrasher]

• Why do Kate Winslet and husband Sam Mendes usually fly on separate planes?

Back in 2001, Sam Mendes was booked on American Airlines flight 77 from Washington to L.A., the one hijacked and crashed into the Pentagon. His plans changed, so he never got on the plane, but Kate Winslet also had a terrorist air-scare in 2001. Now Sam and Kate prefer to fly separately, fearing that if they don't, they will leave their children orphans. [Daily Mail]

• By the by, Kate Winslet says: "There's always going to be a part of me that worries about not looking as slim as other actresses." [Daily Mail]
• Heath Ledger won a SAG award last night. [NY Daily News]
• So you know how Lily Allen just broke up with that 45-year-old dude? Right after, she said: "I think, 'This is someone I’d like to spend the rest of my life with.' But I cannot face having bad sex." [Mirror]
• Here's more on the Prince Harry/Chelsy Davy breakup: This paper calls her a "flighty blonde," but a source says: "Chelsy's heart is with her family and Africa. She comes from a relaxed family with different values and a completely different lifestyle from the royals. This is what Harry loves about her. The irony is that ultimately this is why they can never be together for ever. She has often told her friends she will never marry him not only because she doesn't, ultimately, want to live in England but also because she doesn't want the attention that comes with dating a royal. She wants a normal life." [Daily Mail]
• Meanwhile: Princess Eugenie and some friends got drunk at a pole dancing club and the Princess asked if she could try the pole. (She was denied.) [Daily Mail]
• Oh and by the by, Prince William bought Kate Middleton some deer shooting paraphernalia, including a Swarovski stalking scope. She's looking forward to "bagging her first set of Royal antlers." [Daily Mail]
• Rumor has it Hugh Jackman will do a big opening musical number at the Oscars! [Fox 411]
• Whoa: Will Brad Pitt play Steve McQueen? (Brad says: "Nope.") [Extra]
• Does Anderson Cooper fly in the front while his "friend," an "attractive Hispanic man," flies in the back of the plane? [Page Six]
• Drew Barrymore was promoting her romcom, He's Just Not That Into You, when she said she'd love to bring an old butt-kicking franchise back to life: "I’m so into it—Charlie's Angels III!" [E!]
• Amy Winehouse's husband Blake Fielder-Civil might try to use a love letter Amy wrote to him to get her money in divorce proceedings. In the letter, Amy said she'd write albums especially for Blake Incarcerated; he's expected to argue that it means he's entitled to half of her estimated $15 million earnings. [People, Daiy Mail]
• Are Kirsten Dunst and Josh Hartnett back on? [Extra]
• In this Q&A, Matthew Fox talks about why you never see him lending his name to any causes: "I'm an actor. I try to play a character in a really cool story, the very best I can. And somehow or other that does make people very interested in what I have to say. And I think that, being the stubborn bastard I am… the more people want to hear what it is I have to say, the more I kind of… not say anything." [Men.Style.Com via Details]
• Paramedics were called to the home of Amy Poehler and Will Arnett this weekend, maybe because Amy's mom had a health scare? [TMZ]
• Warning: Russell Brand is thinking about giving up sex. [The Sun]
• A reporter tells Rumer Willis she looks a little like her dad. "She shrieks and grimaces, covering the lower part of her face with her hands: 'I hate my jaw!' she says. [Daily Mail]
• What is going on in the Bahamas? Pleasant Bridgewater, a senior in Parliament, has just resigned. Obie Wilchcombe, a former "close friend" of John Travolta and family  and member of Bahamaian Parliament  was taken into custody regarding an extortion plot. Wilchcombe has been released, but a third person, and EMT who tried to revive Jett Travolta, is sill in custody. [TMZ, TMZ, TMZ, Us]
• Wilchcombe says he had nothing to do with the extortion plot. [TMZ]
• Mickey Rourke hasn't seen The Wrestler  and won't, for a while: "I don't watch anything until three, four, five years go by. I see myself every day in the mirror when I'm shaving. I don't get anything from it." [Extra]
• Samantha Morton says she'll boycott the BBC if the corporation won't broadcast an emergency appeal for help in Gaza. Morton took part in a fundraiser for the British Aid Agency Medical Aid for Palestinians. [The Star]
• Paul McCartney might wed his girlfriend, Nancy Shevell. One might think he'd had enough of marriage… [NY Daily News]
• Countess LuAnn de Lesseps has a book coming out: Class With the Countess: How to Live with Elegance and Flair. Will tips on crotch-grabbing and landing a reality show be included? [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which nymphette actress had a really, really swell time in rehab, and has been telling pals that she 'got laid there' all the time?" [Gatecrasher]
• A prop manager from Lipstick Jungle stole $30,000 worth of designer clothes and accessories, but got caught when a limited-edition bag was seen on eBay. [Gatecrasher via Perez]
• Sayonara! Janet Jackson has postponed her tour in Japan due to the global financial crisis. [Internation Herald Tribune]
• Chris Martin gave a lovely lady, Brit singer Alesha Dixon, a ride home. In his private jet. [Daily Mail]
• Wall Street woes mean celeb houses in the Hamptons are going for slashed prices. [NY Post]
• The Jolie-Pitt mansion in Malibu will be up for sale soon, by the way. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Cool interview with Mad Men's Elisabeth Moss. She says of the show: "Everyone who saw it was like, 'They're SMOKING! They're SMOKING!' No one noticed they were cheating on their wives." [Guardian]
• Psst: Elisabeth Moss and Fred Armisen are planning a hush-hush wedding. [People]
• Patrick Dempsey competed in a car race which raises money for breast cancer, and has also opened the Dempsey Center for Cancer Hope and Healing in Maine. [UPI]
• In a Q&A with Lauren Graham, she talks about doing Guys & Dolls on Broadway; a Gilmore Girls movie (not gonna happen) and a new comedy she'll star in, in which she plays "a self-help guru who is truly a mess." [EW]
• Anne Hathaway Googles herself. [Showbiz Spy]
• David and Victoria Beckham have hired two people to clean their mansion in the country, and the couple are named David and Victoria. [Showbiz Spy]
• Hmm, AC Milan is hoping David Beckham will stay with the team. Ciao, Hollywood? [Independent]
• Natascha McElhone made her first official public appearance since the death of her husband last year, and was carrying her newborn son, Rex. [Daily Mail]
• Tommy Lee was seen hanging out with model Victoria Silvstedt  and she had bandages on her knees. What does it mean? [Daily Mail]
• Seth MacFarlane says Family Guy won't strike back at South Park, and that the Family Guy scripts are written by sperm whales. [TMZ]
• Three's a crowd? Cockblocker George Michael went out with Geri Halliwell and her new Italian boyfriend. [Daily Mail]
• Elle Macpherson is dating a multi-millionaire British businessman named Damian Aspinall. [News.com.au]
• Holy femmebot! Kylie Minogue is mega-Photoshopped in her new ads for jewelry company Tous. [Daily Mail]
• Oh dear: Zsa Zsa Gabor lost at least $7 million by investing with Bernard Madoff, the man who's been making the incredibly wealthy merely rich. [UPI, MSNBC]
• Boy George has been moved to a "softer" prison. Is it made of toilet tissue? [Mirror]
• Ladies and gentlemen, an Iron Maiden hotel. [UPI]
• TV chef Jamie Oliver was asked to rate his looks on a scale from 1-10. He says: "About six and a half. It’s not really about the face, though. I think it’s more about what’s in my trousers, to be honest – apart from cooking, that’s the thing I’ve got going for me and a lot of women say it’s enough." [Mirror]
• "Patsy is a figure of nostalgia, doing everything we daren’t do because of our obligations to our families and society. I have turned into a school prefect now but, much as i love my life, i sometimes think i’d like to skip classes and smoke cigarettes in the duck-house again. I could have been Patsy if i hadn’t turned out to be me."  Absolutely Fabulous' Joanna Lumley. [Daily Express]
• "When you're younger, you're always working for something, and now you realize, this is really it. You'd better be enjoying this, because this is pretty good."  Julianne Moore, who is on the cover of Redbook. [People]
• "I can’t stand Angelina and all her babies. Maddox probably thought he hit the jackpot, but then Angelina proceeded to take him to every other Third World country on the planet. He’s probably like. 'Bitch, when the (bleep) are we getting to Malibu?'"  Chelsea Handler. [Gatecrasher]
• "I swear that my waist is now skinnier than before I was pregnant — how do they do that? Certainly it’s nothing to do with me working out. Jerry Bruckheimer [Shopaholic’s mega-successful producer] hired a personal trainer to help me get rid of the 60lb I put on during pregnancy. He said I was lucky I was blessed with good genes because I had a really bad attitude towards exercise — like stopping when it hurt or got boring and having a cup of tea and a slice of cake. Apparently you are not supposed to do that in Hollywood."  Isla Fisher. [Times of London]
• "I think there's something to be said for looking more natural on film. A perfect physique is unattainable for most women who can't hire personal trainers or who don't have the time or inclination to spend two hours a day working out."  Kate Winslet. [Daily Mail]
• "My grandparents didn't take any pills, and they were fine. Just buck up and get over it. Stop being such a fucking pansy."  Bijou Phillips, Scientologist. [Us via Paper Magazine]

The other tabloids focused on Hollywood's first couple, Angie and Brad. Below, we hope in vain to find fresh gossip in the pages of OK!, Us, Life & Style, In Touch and Star.









Ok!
Though this "special collector's issue" promises to show "All the stars! All the parties!" it actually features 8 pages of pictures from the "We Are One" pre-inaugural concert, and two lame parties that took place over the weekend. False advertising! Next: Former BFFs Drew Barrymore and Cameron Diaz may be fighting because Cam has become more serious since her dad died last year and now Drew is too silly for her. Also, Drew has been a third wheel since Diaz has moved in with boyfriend Paul Sculfor. All that's left for poor Drew now are meaningless flings with a slew of younger men. Lindsay and Sam are in a "sick contest" to be as thin as possible. A source suggests lesbianism may be at fault, since "it's hard to be with another woman and not compare bodies." Finally, actress Parminder Nagra and photographer James Stenson wed in a ceremony that reflected their Indian and British heritage ... and her role on ER. Recently ordained castmate Maura Tierney officiated, and her co-stars John Stamos and Scott Grimes performed as the wedding band.
Grade: F (Being the Secret Service guy who has to move to Texas with former President Bush)

Us
"Why She Called Off Her Wedding" This lengthy story does not say definitively why Jennifer Love Hewitt called off her wedding to actor Ross McCall, but reveals her many character flaws that could be the cause. Jennifer was always crying and whining because their work schedules kept them apart, she got jealous whenever Ross had to make out with girls on camera, she has trust issues because her dad walked out on her, and she has body issues. Also McCall told the mag they are working it out and are both still wear their rings, so maybe the wedding is still on after all. But! What of Kate "Waity Katie" Middleton? Her friend insists boyfriend Prince William will propose before the summer and an expert on the royals says they always get engaged in February. However, Wills still has to complete his Royal Air Force training, so Kate may have to wait until February 2010 for a ring. Carey Hart has moved back in with Pink! They've been separated for a year, but a source says, "it never really ended. They just took a break on the marriage because they couldn't make it work never seeing each other." Next: Britney went to a restaurant in Hollywood with her mom and Justin Timberlake was there dining with Jessica Biel. Brit looked uncomfortable and took a seat at the bar with her back to the couple, supposedly because she "didn't look her best" while Biel "looked gorgeous." Despite rumors that Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen are engaged, a "pal" says he hasn't proposed ... yet. In closing, now women's bodies can literally not measure up thanks to this story that compares starlets' waist measurements. (Fig. 1)
Grade: D- (Having your oath of office flubbed by the Chief Justice)

In Touch
We've already heard about "the shocking book that could split Angelina and Brad," which their former bodyguard, Mickey Brett, is threatening to write, but there are some new juicy details. Mickey supposedly walked in on Angelina and Brad "being intimate" in her trailer only three weeks into the filming of Mr. & Mrs. Smith. Angie won Brad over by doing whatever he wanted in bed, including "buying sex toys, paddles and whips and dressing up in latex," says the source. Mickey says he and Angie used to laugh about what a poser Brad is, like when he got a tattoo to impress her. Also, Angie cheated on Brad with at least one dude since Shiloh's birth AND hooked up with a famous female pop star on numerous occasions. Moving on: Marc Anthony is denying allegations that his fights with J.Lo are violent. "He would never hit her," says a friend. "Marc is not someone to get out of control at all. He has the most respect for women and for Jennifer." Finally, "What happened to their boobs?" When stars such as Anne Hathaway and Lindsay Lohan lost weight, their chests got smaller. But when Nicole Richie gained weight and had a baby, her boobs got bigger. Hopefully In Touch will get to the bottom of this shocking phenomenon.
Grade: D (Being the Chief Justice who flubbed the oath of office)

Life & Style
If you can't get enough of the Obamas, but have a strange aversion to legitimate news sources, Life & Style has you covered. The mag does an impressive job putting together 16-pages of inauguration coverage, despite the fact that the mag went to print before the actual swearing in. There are tons of pictures of Barack as a child, eating chili dogs, and hugging babies, and photos of Malia snapping pictures of the inauguration festivities on her camera (and thank goodness she did, or we'd have NO record of this historic occasion). Plus, in a new take on the requisite piece on Michelle's style, there is an article analyzing her interior decorating taste based on an old photo taken in her living room. (Fig. 2) Moving on: Hopefully people will be a little more sympathetic to Robert Pattinson after reading this tragic four page tale about his low self-esteem, unsuccessful pick up lines, and lonely nights at home snacking on Hot Pockets and Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Sadly, Pattinson is forced to frequent hot Hollywood restaurants and clubs with friends at night because a clause in his Twilight contract forbids him from going out in the daytime and ruining his vampire-like complexion. Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer are off-again. They haven't been spotted together since they went to Mexico for New Year's Eve (and her promotional tour for Marley & Me ended). Next: Lindsay Lohan lost some weight recently and her backbone was sticking out at a recent inauguration party. Her friend says it's because she's stressed and she's been doing ads for Fornarina. "So yeah, if she's modeling, she has to be skinny," says the friend. (Fig. 3) Angelina Jolie has no friends. She's never been into gossiping with girlfriends or making small talk because she thinks it's a waste of time. Brad is starting to miss when he and Jennifer Aniston would hang out with their couple friends. Though Paris Hilton already has a new BFF, she's thoughtfully offered to befriend Angie because she says, "she's strong but gorgeous and uses her fame for good ... I'd have a lot in common with her." Madonna ate the same salmon dish at the Waverly Inn two times last week, so she is clearly following a "salmon retox" diet, in the hope that the omega-3 oils in the fish will help turn back the clock. Lastly, Dr. Rey's heinous plastic surgery casebook takes a turn for the macabre this week, and he suggests that Angelina should steal Penelope Cruz's skin presumably Silence of the Lambs-style. But did they forget to photoshop Penelope's skin onto Angie's face, or does their skin just look exactly the same? (Fig. 4)
Grade: C- (Losing your ticket for a seat at the inauguration and having to stand on the Mall with the huddled masses.)

Star
The newest Jolie-Pitts, Vivienne and Knox, have not been spotted in public since October 8, supposedly because the twins are sickly and suffer from colds, chest congestion, and ear infections. Or possibly, Brad and Angie don't want to let their seven month old babies be mobbed by the paparazzi. Though this article is based on the fact that they twins haven't been spotted out and about, Angie is also accused of being a bad mother because she drags them along while she jets around the world, even though a doctor advised her that flying is bad for the babies. Next up: Jessica Biel and boyfriend Justin Timberlake have been trying for a baby since August. She took a pregnancy test in November, but it was negative, so they're still trying. They may get engaged and wed this summer, but if Jess gets pregnant they'll put a rush on it. "They want to be married before a baby begins to show," says a friend. "Jessica is old fashioned that way." Blind item: Which rocker is about to split from his sizzling young wife? Friends are saying that it's only a matter of time until one of them gets served with divorce papers. Kate Hudson and pro golfer Adam Scott let the world know that they are a couple by making out on the beach. In other news, when Brian Austin Green refused to attend the Golden Globes with his fiance Megan Fox, she retaliated by flirting with Zac Efron all night, hugging and kissing him even though his fellow teen starlet girlfriend Vanessa Hudgens was sitting next to them. Finally: White. House. Baby. In the craziest inauguration story all week, Star claims that Michelle and Barack think now would be a great time to have another baby. Michelle is 45 and had difficulty conceiving Malia, but she's considering in vitro fertilization and will likely start treatments once they've settled in at the White House. Barack loves his girls, but "wonders what it'd be liek to have a son to play hoops with." Because he has nothing else on his mind right now. Even if Michelle can't have another baby, they are planning to adopt an African-American boy and are considering a learning-disabled child because it would set a good example. "They country needs something to be happy about again," says a source. "And what's more joyous than a baby?"
Grade: C+ (Walking down Pennsylvania Avenue in the cold ... and in heels.)

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• So many questions about John Travolta's late son: Could Jett have been saved? Was he autistic? Is Scientology to blame? [Mirror]

• Before he died, Jett Travolta had been taken off of his anti-seizure meds. [TMZ]
• A friend of John Travolta's says, "The desire to protect Jett informed everything John did," including flying his own plane. [Daily Mail]
• And! Looky here: More people are blaming Scientology for Jett's tragic death; saying the religion is responsible for the "willful non-treatment of mental health and neurological disorders." [Hollywood Interrupted]
• A message from John Travolta and Kelly Preston: "We would like to extend our deepest and most heartfelt thanks to everyone who has sent their love and condolences. Jett was the most wonderful son that two parents could ever ask for and lit up the lives of everyone he encountered. We are heartbroken that our time with him was so brief." [TMZ, Perez Hilton, Daily Mail]
• John Travolta held his son's limp hand in the ambulance on the way to the hospital, begging, "Jett, come on, Jett, come on, come around!" [NY Post]
• Oprah has called her buddy John Travolta to offer her condolences. [ET]
• John Travolta's friend and Chief Counsel, Mike Ossi, says: "I will defer to doctors and medical experts, but I don't want anyone to think that John and Kelly did not utilize all available medical and non-medical experts in an attempt to protect the interest of his children." [ET]
• Holy crap: Katie Holmes has spent £10 MILLION since moving to New York six months ago. If she moves, the economy will collapse! [The Sun]
• Do we believe that Scientology helped Tom Cruise overcome dyslexia? [Yahoo News]
• Gwyneth Paltrow is on a detox diet which bans dairy, gluten, meat, shellfish, all processed food, fatty nuts, potatoes and other related vegetables, condiments, sugar, alcohol, caffeine or fizzy drinks. "Happy" new year! [Telegraph]
• For some reason this story is about Kate Moss pregnancy rumors, even though she is seen smoking and drinking beer and her "stomach bump" appears to be abdominal muscle. [The Sun]
• Britney Spears is supposedly dating choreographer Sandip Soparrkar, but his Bollywood actress girlfriend says: "I don’t understand why Britney would stoop so low as to claim someone else’s boyfriend for her own. Sandip and I are very happy together." Uh oh! [Mirror]
• On the subject of Spears: Remember when cops used a decoy for Jamie Lynn Spears at LAX? The woman in question, Adessa Eskridge, says she was plucked from JLS's flight and told, "you're going to help us." Not asked; told. She didn't know why they slapped sunglasses on her and marched her into a crowd of paparazzi until later; she's suing for $100,000. [ONTD]
• Of course Barbara Walters has landed the first TV interview with Patrick Swayze since the Dirty Dancer announced he can cancer last year: Nobody puts Baba Wawa in a corner! [Contact Music]
• Host Samantha Harris wants hot hottie Hugh Jackman to appear on Dancing With The Stars, which would be awesome but will never happen. He's an actual star, see. [People]
• Speaking of DWTS: Karina Smirnoff and Maksim Chmerkovskiy are engaged. [NY Post]
• Michael Jackson, who may or may not be dying, wants to leave his share of the Beatles catalogue to Paul McCartney in his will. McCartney was furious in 1985 when Jackson outbid him to win the rights to the Lennon-McCartney songbook; Jackson wants to make peace. Remember when Mac & Jack were old-tymey buddies? [Mirror]
• Criss Angel is still using his freak "magic" on Holly Madison: They were seen having dessert with Holly's parents in Las Vegas on New Year's Day. Apparently this is the first time Holly's had her mom and dad to meet a boyfriend; was there something embarrassing about Hef? Other than his age, wardrobe and other gfs? [E!]
• Soulja Boy's rep has confirmed that the rapper was indeed assaulted last week; six men came to his home and robbed him and his friends. No word on whether the 18-year-old attempted to "Superman that ho." [Perez Hilton]
• Celebs use Twitter! John Cleese likes Marmite! Britney Spears hearts Japan! Yawn. [Daily Mail]
• Madonna's daughter Lourdes wants to be an actress: She's enrolled at the Professional Children's School, alma mater of Macaulay Culkin, Scarlett Johansson and Sarah Jessica Parker. Hopefully she's seen Swept Away and can just do the opposite of whatever that was. [Daily Mail]
• Speaking of Madonna, her brother conducted an interview from in his bed, in pyjamas and striped silk gown, reclining on two enormous Versace pillows. Of his book, Christopher Ciccone says: "She probably thinks of it as a desperate attempt for attention and money. And, ultimately, a betrayal. I think of it as a thesaurus - it's different ways of defining people and myself - and also as another piece of art." Plus: "I was born my mother's son, but I will die my sister's brother." [Guardian]
• Playwright and actor Sam Shepard was arrested on DUI charges in the town named Normal, Illinois over the weekend. [Breitbart]
• Is Amy Winehouse trying to get her groove back? She was seen kissing Caribbean singer Shayne Ross in St. Lucia right before Christmas. Once you go black… (And remember this?) [Mirror]
• Amy can walk on her hands, btw. [The Life Files]
• Are Prince William and Kate Middleton on the verge of getting engaged? They're staying in some "fairytale log cabin" where some think he's about to pop the question. [The Sun]
• Prince William and Prince Harry are setting up their own private office, which is "a significant step for the two young princes in establishing some independence from their father." [Telegraph]
• Ew: David Spade and Nicolette Sheridan might actually be a couple. [E!]
• Fergie, the Duchess of York, now rules a business empire; in addition to designing jewelry and writing, she's producing an animated film of her children's book. Being royal just isn't enough these days. [Daily Mail]
• Heather Mills is pissed that her former nanny is suing her, claiming "sexual discrimination, intimidation and constructive dismissal." Poor Heather has already spent $14.5 million of her $35.3 million settlement, how can she be expected to live on what's left? [UPI]
• By the by, Heather Mills feels "betrayed" by the lawsuit. [Daily Mail]
• Gary Oldman got married on New Year's Eve  and his fourth wife  Alexandra Edenborough  is gorgeous, dammit. [ONTD]
• Breaking! Is David Beckham out of shape? [LA Times]
• Posh had better get used to a long distance relationship: Victoria and the kids won't join Beckham in Milan when he starts this weekend. [Independent]
• Kudos to you, Kylie Minogue, and your hot Spanish "toyboy" and your French Alps vacation, where you were seen acting like a "loved-up teenager." [The Sun]
• Rihanna's got a huge glittering rock on "that" finger so the rumor is that she's engaged to Chris Brown. [The Sun]
• Jermaine Dupri has written an essay about Barack Obama for The Huffington Post, in which he wails: "Obama hasn't even been sworn in yet and he's being pushed and pulled in all the different directions everyone else thinks he's supposed to go. Everywhere I look people are trying to steer Obama one-way or the other… Who's next in line to bitch?" [Huffington Post]
• Mickey Rourke relates to his character in The Wrestler: "Once you've been somebody, really, you have a career and you're a nobody anymore, and you're getting older, you're living what's called a state of shame. I went through that in the movie business, you know? You are alone." [CBS News]
• Michelle Trachtenberg will return to Gossip Girl, but the commenters over on ONTD are all, "do not want." [ONTD]
• If you like shabby chic, check out the "rock retreat" of Pearl Lowe, Gavin Rossdale's ex and the mom of Daisy Lowe. [Daily Mail]
• If you're dying to know who makes the clothes Whitney Port wears on The City, she has listed the designers in nauseating detail. [Whitney Port]
• Dan Clark, formerly known as Nitro on American Gladiators, says steroids gave him man boobs, shriveled balls and a "dull throbbing pain" every time he had sex. Good times. [Page Six]
• Stars like T.I., Adam Levine, Chace Crawford and Maria Menounos partied in Miami over the weekend. [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which politico adulterer finds many normal objects to be too sexually suggestive, and has to have them removed from his sight while he’s making speeches? Word is he gets too distracted to focus on his notes!" [Gatecrasher]
• Ex-Danity Kane singer Aubrey O'Day will be on the March cover of Playboy, even though she exposed plenty of her epidermis already, on Complex. [Gatecrasher]
• Ranae Shrider, the woman who called Verne "Mini Me" Troyer her boyfriend, is still telling her weird and creepy story to whomever will listen. Now she claims he ordered her around "like a slave" and she ran all his errands while he spent the day Googling his own name. She also says she wanted to be his girlfriend but didn't want to have sex with him. Tsk, tsk. [Mirror]
• Oh, but Verne "Mini Me" Troyer is the favorite to win the UK's Celebrity Big Brother. So there's that. [The Star]
• Speaking of Celebrity Big Brother, apparently Coolio used the N word and caused a stir. [The Sun]
• Yesterday People reported that Tara Reid had checked out of rehab; this was not true. [E!]
• Tara Reid is still in rehab but "doing well." [People]
• Jeremy Piven is dating a black chick. [Page Six]
• Actor/director Richard Attenborough, 85, is in stable condition after a head injury after a fall in his home last month; he was in a coma but has regained consciousness. [UPI]
• "I would steal Kate Winslet’s roles. All her roles. Don’t talk to me about it because she can do no wrong in my eyes. Not only is she the most amazing actress in the entire world, she’s nude in a lot of her films which shows she’s just fearless. Her choices are impeccable. She literally can do anything. If she can just give me two of her roles, I’d be happy."  Eva Mendes. [Daily Mail]
• "People are so enamored of the character that when they see in a script, 'detective,' they think, 'let's bring Belzer in.' They did that on The X-Files, on Arrested Development, on Sesame Street. It's been so much fun."  Richard Belzer on being Detective Munch. [UPI]
• "Men come and go but there really is no relationship like the one you have with a dog  and then they don't live as long as they should. You have to say goodbye way too soon. It's just so sad. It makes me so sad. But their love is unconditional and I love that."  Jennifer Aniston, possibly explaining why she's dating noted dog John Mayer. [The Sun]