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New York, 12:31 AM
Mon Nov 30
18 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #pretaportea more →

    Mischa Barton Does, Like, Good Job On Headband Line

    Haute Couture Cuisine
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of YourScreenplaySucks YourScreenplaySucks
    12/23/08

    In reply to Mischa Barton Does, Like, Good Job On Headband Line
    When a magazine fails to edit out "like" & "um" from your quotes, is it fair to say they are trying to make sure you sound like an ignorant, incoherent valley girl?


    Also, I choose Bette. Not the lipstick, just Bette.

     Reply
    YourScreenplaySucks was starred YourScreenplaySucks was unstarred
    Image of NefariousNewt NefariousNewt
    12/23/08

    In reply to Mischa Barton Does, Like, Good Job On Headband Line
    Other possible excuses:


    "It's keeping those poor kids in Bangladesh employed making new frilly underthings."


    "I was going to wear them, sell them on eBay, then donate the money to charity."


    "Honestly, how was I ever going to get another promotion?"

     Reply
    NefariousNewt was starred NefariousNewt was unstarred
    Image of Mkp-hearts-NYC Mkp-hearts-NYC
    12/23/08

    @NefariousNewt: "The kids are happier when I'm sexy, your honor, as is pretty much everyone else I'm sleeping with. I mean...."
     Reply
    Mkp-hearts-NYC was starred Mkp-hearts-NYC was unstarred
    Image of sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit)
    12/23/08

    @NefariousNewt: "It was a teaching device! If I have eight bedazzled thongs and I buy six more, how many thongs do I have?"
     Reply
    sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) was starred sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) was unstarred
    Image of NefariousNewt NefariousNewt
    12/23/08

    @sarah.of.a.lesser.god (and the ovumlord of the rings): I don't remember that from the SATs...
     Reply
    NefariousNewt was starred NefariousNewt was unstarred
    Image of sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit)
    12/23/08

    @NefariousNewt: Push-up bra is to g-string as
    seamed stockings are to _________
     Reply
    sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) was starred sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) was unstarred
    Image of Eleanor Ramilly Eleanor Ramilly
    12/23/08

    In reply to Mischa Barton Does, Like, Good Job On Headband Line
    Lindsay- those glitter leggings? You did not design those, those existed before you did. Thanks.


    Also, Jessica Simpson's footwear collection? I kind of like it... and it makes me feel wrong.

     Reply
    Eleanor Ramilly was starred Eleanor Ramilly was unstarred
    Image of DangerMouse DangerMouse
    12/23/08

    @Shannon: Ditto--I'm always like, "Oh, those shoes are cute!" Then, I look at the label and feel dirty.
     Reply
    DangerMouse was starred DangerMouse was unstarred
    Image of Eleanor Ramilly Eleanor Ramilly
    12/23/08

    @DangerMouse: Right? Sigh.
    They're all kind of pin up-esque and super sassy.
     Reply
    Eleanor Ramilly was starred Eleanor Ramilly was unstarred
    Image of sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit)
    12/23/08

    In reply to Mischa Barton Does, Like, Good Job On Headband Line
    Cosmo would beg to differ about the bread lines. They are writing an article about this right now.


    "HOW TO SEX UP YOUR BREAD LINE!
    1- Wear sexy lingerie under your secondhand clothes. Feel the satin and lace whisper against your thighs as you stand in the freezing snow to get some nutrients.
    2- Bring along your boy toy! If the line is snaking around the block and you get tired of having to listen to everyone curse Henry Paulson and Richard Fuld, then you can just play "pin the cock on my tail!"
    3- Request penis-shaped baguettes. Just for a laugh.
    4- Put a scrunchie around your loaf of pumpernickel and call it a very bad boy.

     Reply
    sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) was starred sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) was unstarred
    Image of morninggloria morninggloria
    12/23/08

    @sarah.of.a.lesser.god (and the ovumlord of the rings): 5- Don't be afraid to actually eat the bread. You're going to die if you don't! And death is not sexy!
     Reply
    morninggloria was starred morninggloria was unstarred
    Image of Mkp-hearts-NYC Mkp-hearts-NYC
    12/23/08

    @sarah.of.a.lesser.god (and the ovumlord of the rings): Bring along some of the candles you're using to light your home, since you can't afford heat, and make those trestle tables a little more sensual and romantic for your fellow diners! Plus then you'll have hot wax on hand for...later...
     Reply
    Mkp-hearts-NYC was starred Mkp-hearts-NYC was unstarred
    Image of BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit)
    12/23/08

    @sarah.of.a.lesser.god (and the ovumlord of the rings): Glamour had wielded it's infamous black bar once again. Bad breads get the 'Don't' treatment:



    "Fattening white breads may nourish your belly, but they don't do any favors for your thighs! Emaciation is where it's at for every chic breadline this year, ladies!"

     Reply
    BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) was starred BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) was unstarred
    Image of sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit)
    12/23/08

    @BrutallyHonestBabes: Self will be sure to have a headline entitled "Keep Your Energy Up and Your Carbs Low: How to survive the recession by eating insects." It will be on the cover, right next to an airbrushed picture of Faith Hill.
     Reply
    sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) was starred sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) was unstarred
    Image of DangerMouse DangerMouse
    12/23/08

    @sarah.of.a.lesser.god (and the ovumlord of the rings): #1--it's for the fifth graders
     Reply
    DangerMouse was starred DangerMouse was unstarred
    Image of badmutha badmutha
    12/23/08

    In reply to Mischa Barton Does, Like, Good Job On Headband Line
    "A rich array of implausible excuses" pretty much sums up my life before the age of 30.
     Reply
    badmutha was starred badmutha was unstarred
    Image of sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit)
    12/23/08

    @badmutha: It would be a fabulous title for an autobiography!
     Reply
    sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) was starred sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit) was unstarred
    Image of million.dollar.mouth. million.dollar.mouth.
    12/23/08

    @badmutha: Oh, I am so with you. Sadly, at 30, I think it is still accurate many a fuck-up, but I'm workin' on it.
     Reply
    million.dollar.mouth. was starred million.dollar.mouth. was unstarred
    Image of BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit)
    12/23/08

    In reply to Mischa Barton Does, Like, Good Job On Headband Line
    So, to follow Cuteasabutton's example, I give you this on Christmas Eve Eve/ this second day of Hanukkah...



    and it's totally on topic because he's Severus Snape and you mentioned Harry Potter. This is where my brain is today, folks.

     Reply
    BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) was starred BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) was unstarred
    Image of battleaxonista...is a humorless bitch battleaxonista...is a humorless bitch
    12/23/08

    @BrutallyHonestBabes: *attempts to speak*


    *drool*

     Reply
    battleaxonista...is a humorless bitch was starred battleaxonista...is a humorless bitch was unstarred
    Image of cuteasabutton cuteasabutton
    12/23/08

    @BrutallyHonestBabes: Ha! I was watching "Love Actually" last night so yeah...While we're on it, Cedric Diggory FTW!
    robert pattinson Pictures, Images and Photos
     Reply
    cuteasabutton was starred cuteasabutton was unstarred
    Image of YourScreenplaySucks YourScreenplaySucks
    12/23/08

    @BrutallyHonestBabes: I just saw him last night in the movie "Close My Eyes". It was sort of not good, but Rickman was amazing in it and it features about 30 minutes of full-frontal nudity from Clive Owen. So I guess the movie was actually quite excellent.
     Reply
    YourScreenplaySucks was starred YourScreenplaySucks was unstarred
    Image of BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit)
    12/23/08

    @Your Screenplay Sucks:


    30 minutes of full-frontal nudity from Clive Owen


    I'm sorry. I stopped listening after that.

     Reply
    BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) was starred BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) was unstarred
    Image of Aesop's Foibles. YES. Aesop's Foibles. YES.
    12/23/08

    In reply to Mischa Barton Does, Like, Good Job On Headband Line
    I can has chocolate fountain pls?
     Reply
    Aesop's Foibles. YES. was starred Aesop's Foibles. YES. was unstarred
    Image of Aesop's Foibles. YES. Aesop's Foibles. YES.
    12/23/08

    @terribletwenties aka Aesop's Foibles: PLS??
     Reply
    Aesop's Foibles. YES. was starred Aesop's Foibles. YES. was unstarred
    Image of AthertonMerriweather AthertonMerriweather
    12/23/08

    In reply to Mischa Barton Does, Like, Good Job On Headband Line
    Soup lines are where the sexy is.
     Reply
    AthertonMerriweather was starred AthertonMerriweather was unstarred
    Image of tscheese tscheese
    12/03/08

    In reply to Haute Couture Cuisine
    I, on the other hand, have eaten too many cookies in my lifetime to even fit into haute couture, so I'm not sure how this is going to help me here.
     Reply
    tscheese was starred tscheese was unstarred
    Image of Snowbunny Snowbunny
    12/02/08

    In reply to Haute Couture Cuisine
    I thought this was cool until you said "NOT all you can eat buffet." Now all I want is a Pizza Hut lunch buffet.
     Reply
    Snowbunny was starred Snowbunny was unstarred
    Image of VoxPopuli VoxPopuli
    12/02/08

    In reply to Haute Couture Cuisine
    Well this is just cruel. The more likely someone is to follow high fashion to appreciate it, the less likely they are to indulge in such treats, I would think.


    That leg is creepy, but it would make an awesome lamp, like in A Christmas Story.


     Reply
    VoxPopuli was starred VoxPopuli was unstarred
    Image of KathrynwithaY loves Joan Collins KathrynwithaY loves Joan Collins
    12/02/08

    In reply to Haute Couture Cuisine
    The leg poking out of the drink is kinda creepy.


    I like my pastries delicious, so if these little shoes and bags taste good, then I'm in.

     Reply
    KathrynwithaY loves Joan Collins was starred KathrynwithaY loves Joan Collins was unstarred
    Image of A Small Turnip A Small Turnip
    12/02/08

    In reply to Haute Couture Cuisine
    Nah mate, you don't want to be going to the Berkeley for tea. Pffft. Go to The Wolseley on Piccadilly.


    [www.thewolseley.com]


    It is so beautiful, it will make you faint. So will the toasted chocolate sandwich. Also, the last time I was there, Colin Firth was sitting two tables away. So there's that.

     Reply
    A Small Turnip was starred A Small Turnip was unstarred
    Image of overnightly overnightly
    12/02/08

    In reply to Haute Couture Cuisine
    Even if I'm eating a a Balenciaga or Bottega Veneta pastry, if people ask me I tell them it's a stale 3.1 Phillip Lim.
     Reply
    overnightly was starred overnightly was unstarred
    Image of sequined sequined
    12/02/08

    @overnightly: You're so thoughtful!
     Reply
    sequined was starred sequined was unstarred
    Image of Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith
    12/02/08

    In reply to Haute Couture Cuisine
    Looks kind of ...tacky.
     Reply
    Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith was starred Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith was unstarred
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