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New York, 1:46 PM
Tue Dec 22
61 posts in the last 24 hours

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini
    12/17/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    I watched my mother be torn apart and embarrassed by my father's hard porn addiction and know that they did not have sex for the last decade before he died, because she was too mortified and he refused to stop. It was really sad and I wish my dad would have gotten help from people like this who aren't afraid to say, yes this can be a problem and if your relationship with porn is hurting your human relationships, you do need to seek help. From what I know of them, they seem like people who genuinely want to help people have a real problem with porn and are willing to be that support system.

    Me and my husband, on the other hand, love having sex with each other, but we have wildly divergent schedules, so when I'm in the mood, he's usually sleeping or at work and vice versa. If my husband is not available, I watch a little porn, rub one or two and call it a night. Same thing with him. Of course he is my first choice and I love our sexy fun together, but it's not realistic to believe that we'll always be hot and ready at the same time and being sexually frustrated is super distracting.

    I guess my point is that most people can use porn to help release frustration without having it interfere with their relationships or expectations. However, there ARE some people that do hurt themselves and others with their porn habits and it's dishonest not to acknowledge that. They need love and support to get past their problem, and within the Christian belief structure, here is a support system for that. I see no reason to mock them for their efforts any more than Christian drug addiction counselors.
     Reply
    Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini was starred Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini was unstarred
    Image of BytheSea BytheSea
    12/17/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    I couldn't get through all five minutes of this.

    Did he spooge the bible? That's the direction the vid seemed to be going. Kid's got a sick sick bible-wanking fetish. He's just covered in tiny paper cuts down there and he's got bookworms in his pubes.
     Reply
    BytheSea was starred BytheSea was unstarred
    Image of Faster Pussycat Faster Pussycat
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    Who would have thought that her husband would become sexually disinterested in this piece of work?

    I am really disappointed that this was quoted without comment on Jezebel.
     Reply
    yvanehtnioj promoted this comment Faster Pussycat was starred Faster Pussycat was unstarred
    Image of yvanehtnioj yvanehtnioj
    12/17/09

    @Faster.Pussycat: I think there's an implication that this is an obnoxious quote, but I totally agree that this should've been roundly condemned / more fully explored.
     Reply
    yvanehtnioj was starred yvanehtnioj was unstarred
    Image of WanderlustingIngenue WanderlustingIngenue
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    That is his accountability partner, for those who don't understand the significance of the friend. I remember them encouraging us to have those in youth group, and we were much too mortified.
     Reply
    Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini promoted this comment WanderlustingIngenue was starred WanderlustingIngenue was unstarred
    Image of thecounterspark thecounterspark
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    Hi, I feel like I have to speak up on this. I am a proud feminist, and I am a christian. the founder of XXX church did a guest sermon at our church in new york city this past fall. it was "judge-y" or "anti-sex" at all. it was a very sound message about their ministry. it celebrated sex and condemned the hurt, pain and addiction that porn can bring into lives. porn has torn apart my marriage, and with the xxx church's program online, we have rebuilt trust, our sex life has become soooooo much more amazing, and my husband doesnt feel plagued by the guilt he had before. which was many things: knowing that I wasn't ok with it; that he supported an industry that objectifies, hurts, and trafficks women; that he was supporting an industry that created unrealistic standards for women and enforces ridiculous stereotypes; that it was hurting our own intimacy and sex life. i am thankful for XXX church. it saved us. the message was progressive and real. I would hope that real "progressives" would support something like this, and research it themselves, instead of just saying "oh lol it's from those jesus people and it's anti-porn it must be more fundamentalist anti-sex bullshit!". actually, no. and the fact that i have met and come across so many feminists and "progressives" that automatically play that card really disappoints me :(
     Reply
    shorty63136 approved this comment thecounterspark was starred thecounterspark was unstarred
    Image of shorty63136 shorty63136
    12/16/09

    @thecounterspark: Thanks for your comments. I - also a feminist and a Christian...not church-y, but a Christian nonetheless - do get a little sick of the anti-Christianity stories that pop up on here from time to time. Every religion - including Judaism and Islam - has their range of beliefs and believers from the ultra mellow (I would fall in that category) to the really conservative to the batshit crazy.

    I think everybody's got a choice - if you're an adult and choose to believe that porn isn't something you should be into (for whatever reason - whether it be b/c of Christ or Allah or whatever), that's totally your choice...key word: choice. We're all free moral agents, whether we've got a spiritual life or not. You get a choice to believe what you want and act accordingly.

    This Sunday, I'll go to church - then I'm gonna have some Cuban food, a few beers, and smoke the hookah with my mates. Porn may or may not be part of my day - depends on if any redheads are involved.
     Reply
    shorty63136 was starred shorty63136 was unstarred
    Image of Wonder4A Wonder4A
    12/16/09

    @thecounterspark: Thanks for posting this! I am feminist and Christian as well and I agree 100%. Brave of you to share your personal story. I'm unmarried but several of my past boyfriends have had serious struggles with porn and it definitely affected their physical and emotional relationships with women. When I first heard about xxx church, I was excited that someone was addressing the issue. I feel the church has a tendency to sweep issues like this under the rug. Triple X church is a much welcome change in my book.
     Reply
    Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini promoted this comment Wonder4A was starred Wonder4A was unstarred
    Image of thecounterspark thecounterspark
    12/17/09

    @shorty63136: Thanks. i love jezebel so much but get soooo frustrated when there are post so obviously anti-faith and anti-religion. here i am thinking all the time that feminism is about choice, and i find so many inexcusable attacks against my religion. I understand that there are many feminist critiques against fundamentalist religions.. but seriously, why the disparaging sarcastic posts? why cant we have a discussion about porn, religion, sexuality, feminism and life without it bashing christian/religious organizations, esp. when the only commentary that is quoted is sarcastic, demeaning and completely utterly skewed in a world view that is "anything that says the word 'god' automatically denotes 'bad' and anti-sex'"

    the ignorance and prejudicialness of this post astound me.

    there is a LOT wrong with porn. religious, atheist, agnostic whatever, as feminists we can agree that trying to solve this porn destruction that causes so much body-hate, and puts so much strain on marriages can be recognized...i mean... we can agree on that right? or am i a "bad" feminist for being a christian and identifying first hand the negative consequences of porn? feminists discredit my religion so much already, i'd feel even worse being excluded from a movement I identify with (feminism) just because i am against porn and think xxxchurch saved my marriage.
     Reply
    thecounterspark was starred thecounterspark was unstarred
    Image of thecounterspark thecounterspark
    12/17/09

    @Wonder4A: I was so excited too, when I heard xxxchurch was coming to our area. My fiance' and I, at the time, had struggled with his pornography addiction for a while. and though the mainstream feminist collective thought I had been reading had basically taught me "well as long as it's not underage and not taking away from much of your relationship then its totally healthy and fine!"....I knew I felt differently. Everytime my husband/fiance' looked at porn... I felt betrayed. I'm not ridiculous or insecure or petty. These are real emotions. It is a betrayal to me. It is lust. Porn creates this fantasy that we, real women, cant live up to. and exploits and demeans and makes sex worthless. the more that young men are socialized with sex on the basis of porn, the less the chance they have at sustaining a healthy, rational, loving relationnships with a real woman. Porn takes away my husband from me. It CAN BE and IS an addiction. I wish people would stop making excuses for it's existence. the only reason it exists is straight from patriarchy, domination, sexism, etc.

    the truly liberated are those who know love/sexual fufillment without the justification of using/exploiting others.
     Reply
    thecounterspark was starred thecounterspark was unstarred
    Image of thecounterspark thecounterspark
    12/17/09

    @shorty63136: Yeah, exactly. I was just very upset with the voice and connotation of this very anti-religion, intolerant and mocking "journalism investigation". it was highly offensive. I feel that because I know the organization, and it has personally helped me, and porn has personally affected my life and relationship, that I should speak up on the org's behalf - to give another view and share my story.

    everyone has a choice. I choose not to support the porn industry. and if people ask my why, I will give my opinions. but it seems that if you have an opinion on porn that isn't "porn for everyone yay!" then it is automatically intolerant, jugdmental etc. which is highly erroneous and unfair.
     Reply
    thecounterspark was starred thecounterspark was unstarred
    Image of LaComtesse LaComtesse
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    That video could have been 30 seconds and gotten its point across (and it would have been more effective, too).
     Reply
    LaComtesse was starred LaComtesse was unstarred
    Image of RenoMartini RenoMartini
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    Maybe by "12-year-old girl struggling against porn written while crying with alcohol and a bottle of sleeping pills in front of her, because Satan now gives her nightmares," they meant:

    "30 year old struggling against her computer because babeland is uploading too slowly, and she's sobbing into her gin and tonic and calling her PC 'Satan,' because going one more week without her Hitachi will result in the death of someone,"

    If so then yes, that statement was correct.
     Reply
    boxspelunker promoted this comment RenoMartini was starred RenoMartini was unstarred
    Image of Jenloveshercurves Jenloveshercurves
    12/16/09

    @RenoMartini: 27 year old who is crying into her cup of tea and midol who is calling her 3 inch bullet vibrator Satan because she's blown the motor on the third one in six months just when she needs to relief from her horrible nasty mind numbing cramps? Would also be correct.
     Reply
    Jenloveshercurves was starred Jenloveshercurves was unstarred
    Image of Kerplunky Kerplunky
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    If the kid in that video keeps looking at porn with Internet Explorer he'll soon have a lot more problems that another "lonely night."

    Not that I've ever gotten viruses and malware from that or anything. Nope. Never.
     Reply
    Ultraprison! promoted this comment Kerplunky was starred Kerplunky was unstarred
    Image of shorty63136 shorty63136
    12/16/09

    @Kerplunky: Firefox is like the Trojan condom for that kind of thing. Still possible to get something but a hell of a lot less likely unless you completely use it wrong.
     Reply
    shorty63136 was starred shorty63136 was unstarred
    Image of Kerplunky Kerplunky
    12/17/09

    @shorty63136: Oh, definitely. I learned my lesson freshman year of college when I had to sheepishly take my laptop to campus IT. They got rid of all the mess mucking up my computer and introduced me to the wonders of Firefox.
     Reply
    Kerplunky was starred Kerplunky was unstarred
    Image of bookling bookling
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    Wasn't this the group that was in the MTV True Life episode on sex addiction? That the Christian guy with the wife and kids was seeking help from?
     Reply
    bookling was starred bookling was unstarred
    Image of midwestmarge midwestmarge
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    Ha ha! I dated him briefly in the 80s. I didn't know he'd gone national.
     Reply
    Jenloveshercurves promoted this comment midwestmarge was starred midwestmarge was unstarred
    Image of Jenloveshercurves Jenloveshercurves
    12/16/09

    @midwestmarge: Do tell? Are you the reason he associates Satan with sex? Oh goodness, I hope so! I'm now referring to you as you little demon you!
     Reply
    Jenloveshercurves was starred Jenloveshercurves was unstarred
    Image of wilderness wilderness
    12/16/09

    @midwestmarge: Haha, Harmon is my cousin. It's a small world, really.
     Reply
    bowleserised promoted this comment wilderness was starred wilderness was unstarred
    Image of merely_a_muse merely_a_muse
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    Confession: I read this blurb like six times before I realized it said "Satan" & not "Santa" is a pimp.

    I was so confused.
     Reply
    Ultraprison! promoted this comment merely_a_muse was starred merely_a_muse was unstarred
    Image of Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini
    12/17/09

    @merely_a_muse: You are not alone with that misreading. Tis the season and all that.
     Reply
    Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini was starred Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini was unstarred
    Image of KristaJulieva KristaJulieva
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    Different people have different values? I am flummoxed!
     Reply
    KristaJulieva was starred KristaJulieva was unstarred
    Image of UnknownLegend UnknownLegend
    12/16/09

    @KristaJulieva: Shyeah, who knew? I'm more comfortable with intolerance of Christians.
     Reply
    UnknownLegend was starred UnknownLegend was unstarred
    Image of theunsinkable! theunsinkable!
    12/16/09

    @UnknownLegend: No fucking kidding. This post was super judgmental. Some porn *is* degrading to women and *can be* damaging to relationships, and I think the church is perfectly correct to address it on moral grounds. Better than pretending it doesn't exist. Maybe I don't agree with every nuance of the Christian anti-porn message, (i.e. it's anti-gay subtleties) but wow. I'm so confused that this site can run an article about how they don't believe a study suggesting porn doesn't affect young men's perceptions of women's bodies and their relationships and then turn right around and laugh it up about people who are actually trying to address the problem forthrightly. And ignore the outright sexist nasty ass attitude the dude who wrote that piece espoused to??? Not pleased about this analysis at all.
     Reply
    shorty63136 promoted this comment Edited by theunsinkable! at 12/16/09 8:24 PM theunsinkable! was starred theunsinkable! was unstarred
    Image of CurtCole CurtCole
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    I totally thought the dudes in the video were going to get it on. They really shouldn't cast twinks.
     Reply
    CurtCole was starred CurtCole was unstarred
    Image of sableized (sister europe) sableized (sister europe)
    12/17/09

    @CurtCole: Um, hahahahaha, friended for that alone. I live in San Francisco and my building is, shall we say, overrun. That's all I could think of watching this.
     Reply
    sableized (sister europe) was starred sableized (sister europe) was unstarred
    Image of sheistolerable sheistolerable
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    "I'm not sure that we needed an "infiltrator" to tell us that fundamentalist anti-porn programs are ignorant, sex-negative, and creepy. "

    Exactly, so why are you giving this jerk any airtime? People are in that church out of their own choice. And it sounds like (@token_illiterate) they're trying to encourage people to remove porn from their own lives, not make it illegal.
     Reply
    token_illiterate_commenter promoted this comment sheistolerable was starred sheistolerable was unstarred
    Image of token_illiterate_commenter token_illiterate_commenter
    12/16/09

    @sheistolerable: I've never seen fundamentalists who didn't want to codify their beliefs. It is these kind of groups who spawn pro-censorship movements. If this church is different, and really only wants to preach to those that want to listen, then I stand corrected.
     Reply
    token_illiterate_commenter was starred token_illiterate_commenter was unstarred
    Image of BytheSea BytheSea
    12/17/09

    @sheistolerable: To let people knowwhat they would be in for if they take up with some cult -- i mean church.
     Reply
    BytheSea was starred BytheSea was unstarred
    Image of vitajex vitajex
    12/16/09

    In reply to Make This Sunday "Porn Sunday"
    I know when I look at porn, it's not just naked women I look at. I've really been getting into this Romanian appliance porn site I found recently. I just never thought I'd think a toaster INSIDE a refrigerator would be so... HOT!
     Reply
    Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith promoted this comment vitajex was starred vitajex was unstarred
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