Texas Republican Launches and Quickly Folds 'Boats N' Hoes' Super PAC

A high-level employee at a prominent Texas firm that has provided consulting services to some prominent Republicans in the Lone Star State will be closing his Boats N' Hoes Super PAC this week, after people found out about it. This is a dark day in both the world of boats and the world of hoes. And in the candidacy of… » 4/17/14 5:30pm 4/17/14 5:30pm

New 'Cool' Conservative Website Ads Are a Sexist Pile of Garbage

Breitbart, a #cool news outlet for #hip #conservatives who like to #chill with #friends on the #net, is in some hot water today, after ads hyping the launch of its West Coast-centric site Breitbart California featured Miley Cyrus on all fours with Nancy Pelosi's head 'shopped over and Mark Zuckerberg with breasts. What … » 4/07/14 5:20pm 4/07/14 5:20pm

Virginia Republican Wants to Outlaw Oral Sex Between Teenagers

The Republicans of Virginia physically cannot stop thinking about what their constituents do with their genitals. You'd think that, after Ken Cuccinelli and his batshit insane "outlaw oral and anal sex" platform lost the governor's race, conservatives would have realized that any enemy of BJs, etc. is an enemy of… » 1/10/14 6:15pm 1/10/14 6:15pm

Republicans Offer Class on How to Talk to Women Without Being a Dick

The GOP has more problems than a math book with a distant father, but the problem that stings the worst, electorally speaking, is its problem with women. Now, party leaders are doing something about one aspect of that problem, designed especially with the hapless male conservative in mind: sensitivity training. I'm… » 12/05/13 4:30pm 12/05/13 4:30pm

Steve Lonegan's Top Aide Calls Cory Booker 'Weird', 'Strange' and 'Gay'

It appears Steve Lonegan, the Republican Senate hopeful from New Jersey, is employing some world-class jackhole in a key position. Senior staffer and key strategist Rick Shaftan is out there shouting profanity-laced bigoted bullshit about his bosses Democratic opponent Cory Booker. » 10/12/13 12:00pm 10/12/13 12:00pm

Kids With Cancer Being Turned Away From Treatment--Thanks, Shutdown!

Conservatives can't seem to be able to get their story straight on the government shutdown — some are claiming it's No Big Deal, while others are wringing their hands and wailing that it's the Obamapocalypse and that soon we'll all be personally bludgeoned to a pulp by bureaucrats wielding death panels. Both groups are … » 10/02/13 4:30pm 10/02/13 4:30pm

Anthony Weiner's Dick Wagging Might Cost Huma Abedin Her Career

Anthony Weiner concluded a disastrous New York City mayoral primary by being chased through a Midtown McDonald's pursued by a scorned 23-year-old sext partner in spike heels and then driving off flashing his middle finger like the Wiz Khalifa of losing elections, and I breathed a sigh of relief. Our long regional… » 9/23/13 2:25pm 9/23/13 2:25pm

Right-Wing Dumbass Calls Hillary 'Our First Lesbian President'

Looks like American Family Association spokesman Bryan Fischer is quite the busybody! You see, he heard from the Daily Mail who heard from Gennifer Flowers (who apparently is bored I guess?) who heard from Bill Clinton's whispering penis that Hillary Clinton is a totally giant bisexual lezbo in the sack!!! And that » 9/20/13 9:30am 9/20/13 9:30am

Sydney Leathers Chased Anthony Weiner Through a McDonald's Last Night

After netting only 5%(ish) of the vote in NYC's Democratic Mayoral primary yesterday, prolific sexter Anthony Weiner has little choice but to go limping off into the sunset. But it wouldn't be right if the Saga of Carlos Danger simply petered out. No, in order for this story to properly conclude, America needed Sydney… » 9/11/13 10:00am 9/11/13 10:00am

Butt-Grabbing Mayor Declares Self Cured of Creepiness

Between playing pinchyhands with unsuspecting asses and holding press conferences during which he announces his refusal to resign, it's a wonder San Diego mayor Bob Filner was able to carve time in his busy schedule for sexual harassment-curing therapy. But he did it, you guys. Mayor Filner allegedly went to, like, at… » 8/12/13 2:50pm 8/12/13 2:50pm

69 Things More Erotic Than The Sydney Leathers Porn Video

Have you seen the Sydney Leathers porn video yet? I have. And it's only a matter of time before you succumb to your curiosity, too. Just so you're prepared, here are 69 things more erotic than Sydney Leathers on a couch that isn't hers, talking about Anthony Weiner and fiddling around with her vagina on camera. Just in … » 8/05/13 4:30pm 8/05/13 4:30pm

Don't Let All Those Dick Pics Go To Waste -- Make a Calendar!

I got another dick pic yesterday. And I have to say, this one wasn’t bad. Usually, the pics I get remind me of scenes from TREMORS, but this one was back lit with some soft afternoon light. Fine. Still, I felt the same way I do when I get a present from my mother. I pretend to act excited, and say things like “Oh!…

» 8/01/13 11:50am 8/01/13 11:50am

Reminder: Worst Person in Weiner Scandal Is Still Anthony Weiner

Much to the chagrin of the local tabloid headline writer, at this point it's probably safe to say that Anthony Weiner will not be the next mayor of New York City. But something odd has happened as this golden age of dick punmaking in the name of journalism draw to a close— suddenly, we're talking more about the… » 7/31/13 1:30pm 7/31/13 1:30pm