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Tell Us About Your Most Bizarre Experience at a Funeral or Wake

Dearly beloved, we are gathered at this Pissing Contest today to share our stories of the strangest, funniest, and most fucked-up funerals that we’ve ever attended. (Thank you to Maxine Floeffler for the grim suggestion.) Please join me in bowing our heads for a moment of prayer and contemplation...of all the ways a… » 8/28/15 7:30pm Friday 7:30pm

Tell Us About the Most Mortifying Thing Your Parents Have Ever Done 

When you’re a kid and teenager, it often feels like your parents—those annoying, uncool jerks who put their blood, sweat, and tears into raising you and giving you a happy life—have but one singular goal: to embarrass you as much as possible. In this week’s Pissing Contest, we’re talking about the times when our folks… » 8/21/15 6:00pm 8/21/15 6:00pm

The Worst Thing You've Ever Seen on an Airplane

That’s right, ya coozes! Pissing Contest is back! This week, we’re talking about the worst things that we’ve seen on airplanes and—considering how long it’s been since the last time we did this—I know that you’ve got a bladder full of great stories. Unleash the golden stream and we’ll highlight the best tales of… » 7/24/15 8:00pm 7/24/15 8:00pm

The Best Worst Neg You've Ever Heard

One of the most mockable compliments we get as Jezebel staffers is the “I usually hate Jezebel, but...” compliment, which usually comes from male readers who are so shocked and proud of us for writing something that they don’t entirely hate that they reach out and graciously deliver this incredibly backhanded… » 6/19/15 9:00pm 6/19/15 9:00pm

Your Most Disastrous Family Summer Vacation

School’s wrapped up for the year, which means that families across America will soon be packing into cars and hitting the open road for summer vacation. While the purpose of these trips is typically to bond and form memories, they so often (and so easily) go wrong, which is why today’s Pissing Contest is devoted to… » 6/12/15 8:10pm 6/12/15 8:10pm

Pissing Contest XXL: Your Best Worst Celebrity Encounters

For last week’s Pissing Contest, we asked you to share stories of your worst, most outrageous, and disappointing encounters with celebrities. Lo and behold, your responses were so good that we decided to feature them in their own very special post. Welcome to Pissing Contest XXL where you are the real celebrities. » 5/22/15 8:30pm 5/22/15 8:30pm

The Craziest Thing You've Done After a Breakup

The end of a romantic relationship can cause people to do some pretty nutty things that they probably wouldn’t do without broken heart or wounded ego. Breakup with someone and suddenly you start considering ayahuasca retreats in the rainforest, revenge, or—craziest of all—getting bangs. So what’s the most insane thing » 5/01/15 9:00pm 5/01/15 9:00pm

The Sickest Burn You've Ever Heard (or Delivered)

It’s common occurrence: You get into a verbal altercation with someone, mumble something dumb and then later that day come up with the perfect, now useless comeback. Far fewer are the moments when that witty retort arrives at perfect moment and lets you verbally obliterate your opponent with a single turn of phrase.… » 4/17/15 8:00pm 4/17/15 8:00pm

Your Most Embarrassing Moment at a Middle or High School Dance

As a rule, middle and high school are the most embarrassing times of a person’s life and school dances are where we experience the worst of it. Not only are we expected to move our awkward growing bodies in a way that’s deemed acceptable and graceful by other humans, but we’re also risking awkward boners, romantic… » 4/10/15 8:40pm 4/10/15 8:40pm

The Worst Place You Ever Got Sick

Welcome back to Pissing Contest, where every week we try to outdo each other with our craziest real life stories. Today, the Jezebel staff is feeling a little rough after a Thursday night spent welcoming new staff writer Bobby Finger with karaoke and too much beer, so we’re using our pain to inspire this week’s theme:… » 4/03/15 7:50pm 4/03/15 7:50pm

Your Most Over-the-Top Emotional Meltdown

Sometimes shit in life becomes too much and something—be it small or large—pushes you over the emotional edge. Often these bouts of OH GOD MY FUCKING LIFE FUCK YOU FUCK ME FUCK EVERYTHING are accompanied by shouting, crying and general displays of melodrama that you're sure to feel dumb and embarrassed about later. So… » 3/13/15 8:30pm 3/13/15 8:30pm