It's Time to Ignore Piers Morgan
Piers Morgan has gotta go.
Piers Morgan: This Girl Is Too Hot to Slaughter Her Family
Last night, tweeting British man Piers Morgan aired the first part of “Killer Women,” a new special that, according to Piers, will “chill your soul.” But which part of meeting a killer did Piers find most terrifying? That someone so young and so hot could be so murdery at the very same time.
Chris Hemsworth Is a Feminist, Thank Fucking God
Chris Hemsworth, professional handsome man and star of two upcoming big-budget movies with female leads (Huntsmen: We Don’t Know What This Movie Either and Ghostbusters: They’re Womyn This Time), has publicly declared that he is, in fact, a feminist. And thank fucking god, because the last thing I needed on a Thursday…
Susan Sarandon Is So Unbothered by Piers Morgan's Complaints About Her Cleavage
Last Saturday, Susan Sarandon appeared at the SAG Awards in a plunging white blazer and black bra that made appreciators of breasts and Susan Sarandon alike all stop in their tracks and say, “DAMN, MAMA LOOKS GOOD.” Media chode Piers Morgan, however, took a more prudish and ZZZZZ-worthy line of thought.
A Dudefight Is Brewing Between Woke Bae Matt McGorry and a Sentient Rock
Your woke bae Matt McGorry has gone to bat against an enormous head named Piers Morgan, thereby solidifying his “woke bae” status while fighting valiantly in what will likely be a dudefight bloodbath because duh, it’s Piers Morgan.
Of Course Piers Morgan Wants Miss Philippines to Share Her Crown
Piers Morgan, one of those big, painful pimples that is definitely going to leave a scar, has offered his opinions on Steve Harvey’s Miss Universe debacle. And yes, I do recognize that the rest of this post will require us to suspend our normal grasp on reality and pretend that anybody gives a shit about what Piers…
Jaden Smith Has Great Taste in Movies
In today’s Tweet Beat, Jaden Smith has opinions, Piers Morgan is unpopular and I sort of don’t believe Bethenny Frankel’s story.
Celebrity Fight Referee: A Taylor Swift vs. Nicki Minaj Battle Royale
Welcome back to the time-honored tradition of watching celebrities make an asses out of themselves on social media. Thank you social media. I hate you social media.
Nicki Minaj Is Fed Up
In today’s Tweet Beat, Nicki Minaj needs a minute, Bethenny Frankel flexes and Piers Morgan still doesn’t understand that America doesn’t care about him.
American Hero Cher Calls Piers Morgan an 'Old Diva in Fishnets'
Yesterday, famed blowhard Piers Morgan—the biggest threat to U.S./British relations since the War of 1812—took to Twitter to express his discontent about pop stars of a certain age (namely Madonna) wearing revealing costumes. But what about Cher? Even Cher, hissed back Morgan. And having been summoned, the Goddess…
Piers Morgan Hates Cher's Fishnet Stockings, Cher Doesn't Give a Fuck
In today's Tweet Beat, Piers Morgan continues to act like a pompous, rock-faced ass, Sharon Osbourne kisses a llama and we are all Mara Wilson.
Shia LaBeouf's Collaborators Confirm the Actor's Alleged Rape
Following a recent interview in which Shia LaBeouf divulged that he was raped during his #IAMSORRY performance art project last winter, noted dick bucket Piers Morgan repeatedly questioned the actor's allegations, saying (among too many other things) that LaBeouf's "claim to have been 'raped' is truly pathetic &…
Piers Morgan Slams Shia LaBeouf: Rape Claim Demeans Real Rape Victims
Because he now feels compelled to latch his talons into every news story lately, professional blowhard Piers Morgan offered his useless analysis of Shia LaBeouf's recent allegation that he was raped by a woman during his art show.
Piers Morgan, Please Leave Us the Fuck Alone. Sincerely, America
Hey Piers. How's London? You know, that place you live now because you lost your job at CNN because nobody in America wanted to hear you talk?
Piers Morgan Futilely Debates John Legend About 'Nigga'
Piers Morgan, formerly of CNN, thought he wrote something revolutionary about black people's use of the N word on Monday and rightfully found himself in the middle of a shitnado. Luckily, my part-time boyfriend John Legend was lingering around.
Piers Morgan on Monica Lewinsky's Twitter Bullies: She's Asking For It
After Piers Morgan's show was cancelled in February, America got a bit of a respite from his particular brand of insufferableness. But thanks to the magic of the internet and a woman named Monica Lewinsky, Piers is back, writing for the Daily Mail Online about the internet hate Monica has received, the internet hate…
Michael Phelps Is Very Sorry About His DUI
In today's Tweet Beat, Michael Phelps expresses his remorse for recklessly putting the lives of others in danger for the second time, Alyssa Milano is happy with her choice of cellular device and Piers Morgan shares some "breaking news."
Devious Scamp Harry Styles Pantsed Piers Morgan at a Soccer Game
One Direction whippersnapper Harry Styles was up to his usual tricks at a charity soccer tournament for Irish Autism Action yesterday when he pantsed Piers Morgan on the sideline. Poor Piers — just when he probably thought he'd hit hit bottom, a popular 20-year-old in a man bun pulled down his shorts in a stadium full…
Chelsea Handler Tells Piers Morgan to Shove It on Live TV
Whatever you think about Chelsea Handler, the woman's got giant steel balls. During an appearance on Morgan's lame duck show last night, the comedian told the king of the Twitter tantrum what we all wish we could: that he sucks. It's pretty brilliant.
Perez Hilton Just Compared Black Women to Hitler on Twitter
Last night, distasteful orange ghoul Perez Hilton took a break from grinding up other human beings and turning them into money to declare on his Twitter feed that "Inside every gay man is a fierce black woman!"
