personal, political

posts about #personalpolitical more →
Meet Val Kalende, Standing Tall In The Face of Uganda's New Anti-Gay Laws
Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
Afghan Women, Feminism, And The Problem With Limited Options
United/Nations: Ghida Anani On Addressing Violence Against Women
Writer Wonders Why Women Keep Swallowing For Democrats
Neda's Mother: Her Legacy Lives On
Sawyer Makes Personal Political With Shriver, McCain
Unlike Founder, FMF Believes In Polanski Prosecution
Model Behaviors
Women's Issues Are About to Torpedo Bob McDonnell's Campaign

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angelheadedhipster
12/15/09

In reply to Meet Val Kalende, Standing Tall In The Face of Uganda's New Anti-Gay Laws
She's so brave. I'm pulling for her and all queer Ugandans.

Please also keep in your thoughts the family and friends of Walter Trochez, a 25-year-old Honduran LGBT activist who was assassinated Sunday night:

[www.towleroad.com]
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morninggloria
12/15/09

In reply to Meet Val Kalende, Standing Tall In The Face of Uganda's New Anti-Gay Laws
This explains why Ugandan editions of Katie Perry's CD include the lyrics "I kissed a girl, and faced the consequences."
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Sputnik_Sweetheart
12/15/09

In reply to Meet Val Kalende, Standing Tall In The Face of Uganda's New Anti-Gay Laws
What she is doing is incredible and courageous, but I'm really scared for her.
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MIXED
12/15/09

@Sputnik_Sweetheart: I'm so terrified that this woman is going to end up dead.
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yeahisaidit
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
Thank you for pointing out that people who choose to stay with their spouses who cheated should not be shamed for it. I really don't care for the "stand by your man" label -- it doesn't accurately describe the painful discussions and negotiations that often take place in these situations. I remember how much crap Hillary Clinton took over not breaking up with Bill. I didn't think she necessarily chose to stay based on keeping the family together or for political or career reasons -- I mean, maybe she just loves the guy, god forbid -- but the first point is that none of these things are shameful for her, and the second point is that no one knows what goes on in a marriage except for the two spouses involved, and we have to be extremely careful about judging it.
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hortense promoted this comment Edited by yeahisaidit at 12/11/09 12:16 PM yeahisaidit was starred yeahisaidit was unstarred

Thus Spake KATE!
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
I'm not a fan of either of the Sanfords, but it does make this South Carolina girl a little bit proud that shes not going to put up with his shit and accept his excuses. Many southern women are raised with that "stand by your man" mentality which pretty much says that part of being a good woman/wife is understanding that your dumb ol' man can't help but fuck up and forgiving him unconditionally after he does it. its a sexual double standard the excuses male infidelity and its nice to see her say no way.
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NellMood
12/11/09

@KATE!: I'm pretty sure Jenny Sanford wasn't raised in the South, but I agree with you. I think a big part of being a "good girl" is being taught not to rock the boat. Even though I'm not a fan of Jenny (or Mark) I'm glad she's standing up for herself and her kids.
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Thus Spake KATE!
12/11/09

@NellMood: yeah i dont think she is either. her accent sounds vaguely midwestern, maybe? but she has definitely been accepted and embraced by southerns and southern women as a role model, and in this instance she is proving to be a much better alternative to the shrinking violet that peppers southern lit and culture.
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NellMood
12/11/09

@KATE!: Apparently she's from Chicago, but she definitely seems like many of the women I grew up around in SC. I mean at this point she's probably been in the South longer than anywhere else, right?
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doctorzizmor
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
I don't think Jenny Sanford can be accused of not "standing by her man." She found out in January and tried to stick it out - giving him the opportunity to be alone for a month to find himself (just not the mistress). He chose to violate Jenny Sanford's trust AGAIN to take up with the mistress during that time. Seems to me that she tried to save that marriage, but Mark didn't try until there were public consequences for him. No spouse needs that crap.
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raineoffire
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
More accurately, "Mark Sanford Gets Slapped in the Face With Reality of Unsustainable Cheating Situation and Scrambles to Regain the Safety of His Boring Marriage; Wife Says, Grow a Pair and Deal With Your Own Crap, I'm Moving On."
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Leiakat
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
Good for her for having the strength to make the decision that was best for her and for promoting that you are not the failure if your husband decided to stray.
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msAnthrope
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
Jenny Sanford's separation from her husband should in no way reflect on the decisions made by wives of other cheating husbands. Each situation is unique, and each woman needs to consider what actions will truly make her feel self-respect.

Especially in these high-profile relationships, unfortunately much more seems to come into consideration beyond the wife's self-esteem~~ public opinion, the future career of the cheating husband, etc. But instead of women seeing only this type of response and role model~~ sucking it up for the good of the "family," or whatever~~ Jenny Sanford decided that wasn't her responsibility. It was her husband's and he made the decision to risk those tangibles when he screwed around with another woman.

Jenny Sanford brings a very important alternative message to every woman who finds herself in this situation: self-worth is not dependent on whether or not one's husband chooses to be unfaithful. It's very strong and, as someone who's been in her position (without any of the public scrutiny) I can say it can be a very difficult road to travel.
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filthy tongue
12/11/09

@msAnthrope: Not to mention the fact that Mark Sanford behaved like such a buffoon, I think many folks would have lost respect for anyone who had stayed with that. I sure as hell would have.
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msAnthrope
12/11/09

@filthy tongue:

Definitely when your husband is calling another woman his "soul mate" it's really demoralizing and insulting!
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OneTwoPunch
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
Love her! Strong, honest, capable, smart. She rocks. And she'll be just fine .

Him? Oy. What a typical mid-life crisis case. Such a boring story, really. Why do these power men always seem to play out archetypes of the madonna/whore syndrome? Marry the "good" respectable girl, sneak around with the "hottie" on the side. Why not marry someone who does both for you?!
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yeahisaidit
12/11/09

@OneTwoPunch: Unfortunately, no matter how "hot" your spouse is, the erotic excitement of someone who is not your spouse is probably always going to be there (see: Christie Brinkley, Elin Nordegren, etc. etc.). The bigger issue in fidelity, I think, is how seriously you take your commitment to being faithful. I also think about John Edwards's insight into cheating, which boils down to one word: ego.
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OneTwoPunch
12/11/09

@yeahisaidit: Exactly. Weird, I'm working on a cover for this book called "Too Soon Old: 30 True Things You Need to Know Now" with a foreword by Elizabeth Edwards. What an unfortunate subtitle for her book (orig. published in 2004)!

What I specifically meant was the compartmentalization men of power seem to have regarding women in their lives: one woman for their public lives, one for kinky sex, one for emotional support and "buddy" sex...the list goes on and on.

Like these famous men are so vast and enormous in scope, one woman could never satisfy them—a total ego trip. There are plenty of women who have just as deep depths as these men do. In the case of this article about Jenny Sanford, she seems to have even MORE substance than the man who supposedly found his "soulmate". I think he was trying to class up a sordid affair, so his publicist gave him some nifty language to use.
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Edited by OneTwoPunch at 12/11/09 12:25 PM OneTwoPunch was starred OneTwoPunch was unstarred

TheocratsForDarwin
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
Jenny Sanford has four young sons who, fortunately, are learning from their mom that integrity is not only at issue, it is THE issue.
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PaigeTurner
12/11/09

@TheocratsForDarwin: Agreed, I think she is doing a commendable job. I also hope those boys have more male role models present in their lives besides their father.
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Ailatan
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
so, Mark I guess things didn't work out with María?
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PaigeTurner
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
"You can forgive, but can you forget?"

How inane. Were those really the best questions Barbara could muster?
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Little Green Frog (Wise Latina)
12/11/09

@PaigeTurner: Yes.
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funnyface
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
Too late, Mark, she filed for divorce: [www2.counton2.com]
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Anna N.
12/11/09

@funnyface: Thanks for the link! Added it.
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TotalBetty
12/11/09

In reply to Jenny "Most Fascinating" Sanford Files For Divorce
what do you have to do to get impeached?
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funnyface
12/11/09

@TotalBetty: Basically, he'd need to have a better Lt.Gov. No one here likes the Lt. Gov. any more than they like Sanford, so they'd rather keep him than remove him and have Bauer take his place.
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Alys Brangwin has a huge talent
12/11/09

@TotalBetty: Be a Democrat!
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theysaidwhat
12/11/09

@TotalBetty: I think you have to commit a felony. But that may be only one way to get impeached. Probably others as well.
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