1.) Chris Brown loves women.
He appeared on The Wendy Williams Show today to continue The Remorse Tour '09.

2.) The Unveiling of Charla Nash
Charla—who had her hands and face gruesomely torn off by her friend's pet chimp—was interviewed by Oprah this week. Her eyes were lost in the attack, so she hasn't seen what she looks like.

Also, while I generally love primates, the one who attacked Charla looks like an asshole.

3.) Slade's smiley

4.) Ben Affleck's cameo on Curb Your Enthusiasm
If you blink, you'll miss him.

5.) Tabloid stars collide

On The Insider this week, Jon Gosselin was giving Levi Johnston some "parenting advice." Earlier in the week on the same show, he went into some detail about his responsibility as a parent.

And he also talked shit on Kate's hair and kissing skills.

6.) Speaking of hair…
This kid has been suspended from school for getting an elaborate design shaved into his head. He is not allowed to return unless he shaves the rest of his head. His parents are supporting his "freedom of expression." Judging from the way he speaks, this kid needs a lot more school, and a little less expression.

7.) Men blame everything on our periods!

8.) This:

9.) Stephanie Pratt is growing on me.

10.) "It's important for women to stick together."
Faux-minism is not the answer for tackling double standards, when you don't even know what "double standards" are.

Here's the horror story that begins Jon Hochschartner's recent "Sex in the SUNY" column:

I woke up slowly, pushing the naked girl beside me for more covers. Eventually it was time to get up, so I reluctantly rubbed the sleep out of my eyes.

That's when I realized I was wet. I threw the sheets off myself and saw I was covered in blood - from my chest to my dick. I started looking for some kind of mortal wound but couldn't find anything.

So finally, I looked down at her and she was covered in it too. Then it dawned on me: menstrual blood.

I don't remember if we were drunk the night before, but clearly there was some serious miscommunication. I mean, damn, scarred for life.

Obviously we can't expect opinion columns in college newspapers to be models of enlightened views — if memory serves, my college paper once ran a screed on why no one should ever have to take English classes, and another on how gross it was to have to stand next to poor people at Wal-Mart. Still, Hochschartner does deserve a wake-up call: the "naked girl" taking up space in his bed was actually a living, breathing — and yes, bleeding — human being. I'll admit that stained sheets are an annoyance, but getting menstrual blood on oneself is a monthly occurrence for women, and yet we somehow manage to avoid PTSD. Understanding this, and accepting that the vagina is part of the female reproductive system and not just a sterile hole for your dick, is an important step toward becoming a man worthy of fucking. Hochschartner did talk to some women for his column — their recommendations include towels, shower sex, and, Dr. Ruth's favorite, diaphragms. I'd advocate that these ladyfriends involve him in regular discussions of menstruation, at least until he's desensitized. Because there's really no excuse for a guy to be afraid of a little blood.

Yesterday I recommended that women quit treating periods as a female-only topic, and I'd like to reiterate that recommendation now. Last year I had to teach a 25-year-old man — who had previously lived with a long-term girlfriend — that women do in fact need to use more than one tampon per period, and I think it's high time that guys started getting this information early. Comprehensive sex ed can help — while the girls in my fifth grade class were getting our first "changing bodies" lecture, the boys were watching The Mighty Ducks or something, and there's no reason boys shouldn't get the opportunity to hear the gym teacher say "uterine lining" too. But more than that, if boys and girls and men and women would all stop treating menstruation like some ultra-private phenomenon, the world — and the vagina — would be a happier place.

It's true that not every woman likes period sex (especially on heavy days, there can be cramping issues). And guys' tastes do deserve respect — if they really prefer to abstain until a woman is ritually pure, that's up to them. But I'd argue that learning to like period sex is worth some initial discomfort, both because it adds three to seven days per month when you can bone, and because it represents a level of comfort and familiarity with the actual female body, not the sanitized version pushed by "lad mags." And while I wouldn't advocate kicking a guy to the curb just because period sex isn't his favorite, I would wager that someone for whom menstrual blood triggers "post-trauma flashbacks" may not be a keeper.

If It's That Time Of The Month, Go On Vacation [Cardinal Points]

Earlier: Dr. Ruth Personally Advises Us On Period Sex

The photograph at left is the work of artist Ingrid Berthon-Moine. It is part of a series of pictures that show women wearing the blood that was only recently inside their bodies on their lips. If you think this is gross, Germaine Greer has some choice words for you: "if you think you are emancipated, you might consider the idea of tasting your own menstrual blood – if it makes you sick, you've a long way to go, baby," she wrote in 1970. Berthon-Moine doesn't create these images to gross us out, but rather to show "what you usually don't see—tampons, blood, all that."

As the Guardian reports, Berthon-Moine is only one out of many modern period activists. Kira Cochrane also cites Cella Quint, the creator of a zine titled "Adventures in Menstruating," Rachel Kauder Nalebuff, author of My Little Red Book, and former Jezebel editor Moe Tkacik for her disgustingly illuminating narrative about exactly what happens to a tampon stuck inside a body for 10 long days. It seems like periods are suddenly hot shit. Cochrane writes:

It seems that menstrual activism (otherwise known as radical menstruation, menstrual anarchy, or menarchy) is having a moment. The term is used to describe a whole range of actions, not all considered political by the person involved: simple efforts to speak openly about periods, radical affronts to negative attitudes and campaigns for more environmentally friendly sanitary products. (It is estimated that a woman will dispose of 11,400 tampons in her lifetime – an ecological disaster.)

Cochrane also humerously mentions the Moon Cup-ers: the extremely vocal group of sanitary-product devotees that have got us reconsidering the cost (both environmental and financial) of tampons.

It's probably no surprise that we think this new found openness is pretty great. Despite the weird name, Menarchists are trying to do for periods what Oprah did for pooping. Periods are sometimes gross, somethings funny, often uncomfortable, but they shouldn't be taboo. I'm not going to trade my lip-gloss in for the au naturel look favored by Berthon-Moine, but the more people talk, write, and think about periods, the better.

It's In The Blood [Guardian]

Related: Ten Days In The Life Of A Tampon

1.) Janice Dickinson
The Insider has a new format sort of based on The View's "Hot Topics," in which the "news" correspondents and a celebrity guest debate bullshit tabloid stuff. The show describes it as "entertainment news with opposing views." Janice Dickinson was the guest on Wednesday, and they really need to just give her the job permanently, because she has finally found her perfect calling.

On Jon Gosselin:

On Whitney Houston:

On confusing saying the word "jackass" and acting like one:

2.) Bobby Brown's body is "pure"

What does Janice think of him?

3.) New Judge Judy episodes!
It's been a cruel summer without some new JJ. Thankfully the new season has returned to dispense the most practical advice in the world.

4.) "Get off your period, dude."
On The Real World: Cancun reunion show, Emilee almost got all L7.

5.) Police work stinks for women

6.) Why did Kim look like Dracula's girlfriend?

Oh, and of course, this.

7.) "Get ready for the fashion show!"

8.) They're just not that into you.
On True Life: I'm Polyamorous, three gay men were in one relationship with each other, but one of them is totally the outcast.

The outcast's solution was to add one more guy into the mix, to a balance. Once he found a suitable candidate, he brought him home to meet his boyfriends, and it all worked out for the best.

9.) How not to raise children.

10.) Paula Abdul

She needs a pageant mom for some stability.

1.)The Jerry Lewis Telethon
He ages like cheese, becoming saltier, stankier, more intense, and thus more enjoyable.

Also more offensive.

2.) AARP Lapdance

Charo performed Rihanna's "Don't Stop the Music" in the middle of the night during the telethon. I guess the intent was to wake people up. She went out into the crowd to get the audience dancing. When they didn't want to, she would hit them with her vagina.

3.) Tyra's back!

4.) And she wants to teach you stuff.
About menstruation.

How to frown with your eyes.

And how to not like your makeup.

5.) Janice still hates her.
After Tyra's Nightline interview during which she refused to discuss Janice Dickinson, Janice went running to The Insider to respond.

6.) The View returned.
Which is good news for those suffering in the recession.

7.) Kim needs a job.

Her daughter concurs.

8.) Blind-folded musical chairs.

9.) "She ain't messin' with no broke bro."

10.) The La Toya interview tonight will be awesome.
Judging from The Insider's preview of it.

Most educational films about menstruation were either antiseptic and formal or eye-rollingly cheesy, and definitely have their place in the YouTube canon, but this 1974 filmstrip called Linda's Film About Menstruation manages, in less than twenty entertaining minutes, to cover everything from ancient tribal taboos to the different types of tampons (including a kind I'd never heard of that no longer exists — the "stick tampon") in a way that is way more self-aware than I thought anyone but Woody Allen was in 1974. In chapters with titles like "The Missing Wastebasket" and "Judy's Nightmare," a 15-year-old named Judy educates herself and her (disturbingly older-looking) boyfriend about menstruation. In the clip above, Judy introduces herself and her problem: at fifteen, she hasn't yet gotten her period. The video is confusing at first (she's really introducing herself with her bust/waist/hip measurements?) but by the time Judy yells at Johnny "It means blood is flowing out of my uterus!," we realize the jokes are very much intentional. The only way I can describe this thing is if a 1974 version of Sassy Magazine got Gilda Radner to write a menstruation filmstrip. And then got an adorable comic actress (Mady (Heflin) Kaplan) to star in it.

Judy's new friend in the park talks about using two tampons at once (not recommended!):



Judy and her boyfriend head to Staten Island, reflecting on all that they've learned:



It was hard to choose clips from this thing because the whole eighteen minutes is really fascinating. Just those exotic and mystical 1970's accents alone!

Linda's Film On Menstruation (1/2) 1970s [YouTube]
Linda's Film On Menstruation (2/2) 1970s [YouTube]

Related: Ten Days In The Life Of A Tampon

His therapist then asked him to touch his face, to confront his anxiety about the germs from the washcloth. When she asked him what was on his face, he answered, "Vaginal secretions, vaginal blood, endometriosis, fibroid juice…" (I love "fibroid juice" because it sounds like a supplement my mother would drink to make her poop.)

The guy in the clip is gay, and I'm curious to know if that contributes to how totally freaked out he his by the "tampon residue," or if this is something that would affect a woman or a straight man with OCD. I say this only because I know a few gay guys without OCD who wouldn't want to sit in the bathroom with me and talk about my used tampon.

Of the 35,000 black women between the ages of 21 and 69 profiled in the study, 43% had been physically abused in childhood and 18% had been sexually abused. Those who were sexually abused (as Oprah was) were more likely to start menstruating before age 12. The effect was stronger the more frequently they were abused — girls who were abused up to three times were 26% more likely to start menstruating early, while those abused four or more times were 34% more likely to have early menarche. There was a weaker, but still present, correlation between physical abuse and early periods.

Researchers think that it might actually be possible that sexual abuse causes earlier menstruation, as opposed to a simple correlation. The idea that sexual abuse actually changes girls' bodies, rushing them into physical maturity and making them vulnerable to pregnancy at a younger age, is perhaps even scarier than the sheer prevalence of physical and sexual abuse among African-American women. This possibility reveals, in the most upsetting way possible, that social as well as genetic factors may influence menstruation. The study's findings, along with the sheer number of women who report suffering abuse, underscore the need for better detection of abusive situations, more social services for girls, and more study of the underlying psychological and social problems that cause sexual abuse and allow it to continue.

Sex abuse linked to early menstrual period [UPI.com]
Higher Prevalence Of Early Onset Of Menstrual Periods Among Survivors Of Childhood Sexual Abuse [ScienceDaily]

(Thanks to the reader who tipped us about Cooke's post on the Times of London's Alpha Mummy blog.) Cooke interviewed more than 4,000 girls for her new teen advice book The Rough Guide to Girl Stuff, which was released earlier this year in the U.K., and in the post she shares her tips for getting along with teenage girls that we wish our parents would have heard when we were growing up.

Her first tip is for parents to explain that the changes a girl's body goes through during puberty are normal, especially since this is when many women develop the idea that their bodies are gross. Advertising and older women make it seem like every hair must be plucked out and periods are either a "curse" or a sign of sexual maturity. Cooke advises:

Without being hippy-drippy or saying "this means you're a woman now" (which is a very confusing and creepy message for an 11 year old), just let her know that what she's going through is natural, the right time for her, and nothing to do with being grown up or ready to have sex. It's just what happens to everybody.

She also points out that while parents are freaked out about answering questions about pregnancy, STDs and drugs, those are not most girls' top concerns. Cooke says girls "are much more likely to ask 'Should I move, or what?' and 'How do I know he's the right one?'" Addressing a teen's questions about the emotional side of sex is likely to make her more receptive to listening to her parents concerns about her safety.

Plus, too many parents get fixated on their worries about their teen having sex and doing drugs and ignore the day-to-day concerns that are actually more stressful for most girls. Cooke writes:

At times, she may be much more fiercely gripped by fears and self consciousness about a bully, some bother in a group of friends, spots, falling in love, heartbreak, whether make-up is a good idea and what to wear. Don't dismiss these as "trivial" – they can have important consequences for her confidence and learning how to take life's knocks. Denying that they are real knocks won't help.

Cooke's basic strategy of talking to a child about everything and anything, and listening to what they are worried about, is good parenting advice whatever age or sex the child may be. It's refreshing to hear some healthy and realistic advice about talking to teens, especially when so many public service announcements make it seem like they're ticking time bombs just waiting to steal your prescription drugs and impregnate themselves at the first opportunity.

5 Steps To Understanding Teenage Girls [The Times of London]

Welcome to 'Fine Lines', the feature where we give a sentimental look at the YA books we loved in our youth. This week, Lizzie Skurnick tackles Judy Blume's 'Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret.'

Are you there God? It's me, Margaret. We're moving today. I'm so scared God. I've never lived anywhere but here. Suppose I hate my new school? Suppose everyone there hates me? Please help me God. Don't let New Jersey be too horrible. Thank you.

Don't let New Jersey be too horrible....was there ever a greater metaphor for the terror one feels at the onset of pubescence? (I'm from Bergen Country and live in Jersey City — so no haters, please.) But, in her merest, timid request, the person of Margaret Simon, the character who introduced young girls everywhere, and I do mean young girls everywhere, to the notion of getting their periods, puts her finger exactly on how it feels to start to grow up. It's not like an exciting trip to Radio City Music Hall with Grandma. It's a long, featureless ride in the other direction, culminating in an blank exit ramp off a highway into a town without anyone you know.

Before I continue, I must pre-apologize as I scrupulously never pre-apologize and say: It's difficult for a teen columnist to write about AYTGIMM. It's like being a writer for Rolling Stone and being seated next to Keith Richards on a six-hour flight, or an artisanal chef given access to a store of black-market ricotta. I feel awed and unworthy, and as if whatever I do will perforce not be enough — if I even knew what to do in the first place.

Now! Apologia in place. Let us move on to the person of Margaret Simon. I had not visited with Margaret for a while, and thus only remembered her late-hour duck into a church's confessional and the velvet hat that she wore to Rosh Hoshana services. (You girls stuck on two minutes in the closet: you are filthy, filthy!) But for those who can only call up the dim memory of a pink sanitary belt and some stray hairs held up with bobby pins, here's Margaret's deal: her parents, whether to have more garden space, put her in public school, or get her oh-so-gently get out from under the thumb of her father's doting Jewish mama, have moved to Farbrook, NJ. Margaret, an only child, is flat-chested and bra-less — though not aware that she should care about those things until instructed to by her new neighbor, Nancy. She is also church- and temple-less, and also not aware that this is strange until instructed so by her new neighbor, Nancy. Concerned about what God, bras and friends like Nancy mean to her present and future, she embarks on a quest to figure it all out — knowing that some form of benediction will come when she finally receives proof positive she IS growing up in the first place: viz, the arrival of her period.

Margaret's new life in Farbrook is a far cry from her old life in New York, filled with private schools, concerts with Grandma and the stimulation of the big city. But the static petri dish of suburbia is a far better medium for emotional growth. There is her first opportunity to compare her life to that of other girls her age — "The first thing I noticed about Nancy's room was the dressing table with the heart-shaped mirror over it.....When I was little I wanted a dressing table like that I never got one though, because my mother likes tailored things" — as well as more boys hanging around to ogle, like lawn-mower Moose Freed. There's the public school where she sees sex films and is asked by her nervous Columbia Teacher's College grad-teacher about her views on religion and male teachers, and a new group of girl friends, the PTS's (Pre-Teen Sensations!) who, together, do the important work of growing up, like getting bras, waiting for their periods, and writing lists of the boys they like — then saying nasty things about the one girl in their class who has her period, really needs a bra, and does not lack for male attention.

For the entire span of this column, there has never been a time when I could not return back to both the moment in time when I read the book as well as re-experience exactly what it was like to do so. But in re-reading AYTGIMM, I was deeply disturbed to find I couldn't do either. I remember well what happened AFTER I read it. (I went up to my mother, said, "What's a period?" and when, after she responded darkly, "Who told you about THAT?" learned all about ovaries, fallopian tubes and ovulation from her very fine illustration.) And I remember very well WHAT it was like to read it — to be firmly ensconced in Margaret's psyche and her life in Farbrook, to be competitive with Nancy, delighted by Moose, happy to see Grandma, annoyed to have my Florida vacation ruined by my awful Ohio grandparents — and desperate, desperate for an excuse to finally pull out the Teenage Softies I'd been hiding under my bed.

But on this return — the events of Margaret's life seemed thin to me, and her concerns so very distant. Rather than feeling like I could reexperience everything with her, I felt nothing so much as if I were spying.

And — do you know what? I think I was. Because there is nothing thin about the events of Margaret's life, and nothing small about her concerns. There is nothing more charged than the year we girls start to think about sex. (Margaret doesn't talk to God because she's religious — she talks to him because she can't figure out who else could safely hold all this powerful information.)

I know one thing — I'm not sure I can. Because, like any club, "Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret" might be an institution made for a certain kind of member during a certain kind of time, and this old lady has no more business being there than Moose Freed does listening at the door. (After all, now I'm closer to grandma Sylvia Simon's age — ACK! — than Margaret's.) So, I look forward to hearing from you all in the comments about your memories, but I'm going to let my memories stay safely they belong — with me, at age 7, about to run up and ask my mother about this whole "period" thing.

Goodbye, Margaret! Goodbye, girlhood! And — saddest — goodbye, PTS's.

• • • • •

Okay, first of all, Hi. I mean, Hi! Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii! Hello my beauties! I am so sorry I left you behind for so long and I missed you so! I have no excuse for my absence at all but to say, I can't do anything in February, but this year, February lasted from October until now. (Thank God it's finally March!) But Fine Lines has returned and now will appear biweekly, alternating with Shelf Pleasuring, which is to say, I will be here twice a month and all about you and your YA.
Some minor housekeeping thingies:

I have a profile on Facebook! Friend me there! You can see a) Shelf Discovery's new cover, b) many OLD covers, and c) one vast desert of non-postings. I will post more now, promise.

I have a mailing list! Join It! When you do, I think it sends you all the old messages too. Do not be confused by this. I will add some new ones.

I have a book! You might want to purchase it! You can buy it here, or, if you do like that, here.

I have a blog. Do not visit my blog. It is hacked and infested with spyware and a brilliant Roumanian developer is fixing it, but he is not done yet. Don't go to my blog.

Now! Onto Plotfinders.

I know I am so backlogged on Plotfinders that a) I can't remember which ones I ran and b) I can't remember who is up next. In honor of the title of same, I have simply decided to put here an abundance of Katherines. Since the column is now only running twice a month, I am switching the prize from a column choice to either a galley or a young adult novel of my collection, depending on my publisher's generosity. Let's hope a galley! I want to KEEPS my books, pretties!

From Catie C.:

I have a book in mind but cannot for the life of me remember the title of it. The plot revolves around two sisters - possibly twins - one of whom dies from a brain aneurysm on the first day of school after complaining of a headache. She had asked for pop-tarts for breakfast that morning, and the mother feels guilty later for having denied her daughter's pop tart wishes. The story may have taken place in Florida, and I seem to recall the surviving sister wearing a stuffy black velvet dress to the funeral. This book also had a sequel, the title of which was an address, such as "9 Adelaide". I think the street name started with an "A", although I could be making that up, and I remember the house having a stained glass window in the living room, although I may have invented that too. In the sequel, the protagonist (who is the surviving twin from the first book) goes on a fishing trip with two men (possibly her Dad and her Uncle?) and drinks beer, then drinks swamp water to quench her thirst. I also remember her spending time with her grandmother, although that could have happened in the first book. It's a long shot, but any ideas?

From Katie M.:

I think the title might have been something along the lines of "Why Me?", but that's not showing up in Google searches. It was about a normal girl whose kidneys suddenly failed. She had to go through the whole dialysis thing, strictly regulating liquids, etc. I remember her quitting ballet lessons because the dialysis tube showed through her leotard. Of course, she was looking for a kidney transplant, but the catch is she was adopted. So she had to hunt down her birth mother. I remember her being successful in finding her, but then I either lost the book or had to return it to the library or something, and I never found out what happened. Any idea what it might be? Thank you!

From Katherine S.:

OK, I read this book again and again, probably in the late 80s. There are 4 teenagers, 2 guys and 2 girls (I think one of the guys is black and the other is an angry, angry racist redneck-type, but I'm not positive), coming back from some sort of acting competition/performance, when for some reason they have to stop (their car beaks down?), and they go to this creepy old house for help. Creepiness ensues, and they're trapped in the house. I think the house belongs to an old guy who is into magic tricks. The main character is a girl who is into magic tricks. They all have black tights and turtlenecks, because that is what they wore at the competition, and in order to escape or outwit the creepy guy, they wear all black and cut off parts of extra tights to put over their hands and faces so that they can hide in the shadows, and the main character girl does something where she figures out how to hide in the false bottom (or escape out of the false bottom) of a trunk that a magician would use for a disappearing act. And I'm pretty sure the two girls and the two guys end up in couples by the end. That's all I got. Help, please!

You know the rules — or, if you don't, here are the rules! First reader to call the correct answer either in the comments or in an email to jezziefinelines@gmail.com wins whatever I can devise as a prize. Three books, three winners this week.

You can also send me your Plotfinders to jezziefinelines@gmail.com, as you can any other information you feel you need to impart.

Again: I MISSED YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love,
Lizzie

Fine Lines (All Previous Columns)
Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret [Amazon]

A new study by psychologists at Hertfordshire University in Britain found that women are more likely to go on a shopping spree 10 days before their periods begin, reports the BBC. Professor Karen Pine conducted a study of 443 women from the ages of 18 to 50 and asked them about their spending habits. Of the 153 women in the study who were in the later stage of their menstrual cycle, almost two thirds said they had recently bought something on impulse and 57% said they overspent by more than £25. "The later women were in their menstrual cycle, the more likely they were to have overspent," said Pine. "Spending was less controlled, more impulsive and more excessive for women in the luteal phase."

The psychologists had two theories as to why the women were spending more right before they got their periods. They believe women may be shopping excessively in an attempt to deal with negative emotions they experience during their cycle. These hormonal fluctuations affect the part of the brain that deals with emotions and inhibition. "The spending behavior tends to be a reaction to intense emotions. They are feeling stressed or depressed and are more likely to go shopping to cheer themselves up and using it to regulate their emotions," Pine said, according to The Daily Mail.

Since previous research has found that women dress up more while they are ovulating, Pine's other theory is that women are buying things during this time to make themselves feel more attractive. Most of the items the women reported spending too much on were jewelry, makeup, and high heels.

The research also showed that women had more buyer's remorse right before they get their period. Pine suggests, "If women are worried about their spending behavior then they should avoid going shopping at the end of their menstrual cycle." Uh, thanks.

Shopping Sprees Linked To Periods [BBC]
How A Woman's 'Time Of The Month' Can Be Blamed For Her Desire To Go Shopping [The Daily Mail]

First, disclosure: Managing editor Anna Holmes, former editor Moe Tkacik and this website's commenters are all quoted at length, posts are cited, and Jezebel is credited as one of the progenitors of the the new openness, "the leader of the oversharing crusade, with vibrant, aromatic and really graphic posts about everything from lodged tampons to yeast infection remedies to bloody period sex to female ejaculation." And we can't deny it: we have been known, on occasion, to wax anatomical. Not only do we as a community not happen to find the female body an uncomfortable subject, but it's safe to say we all appreciate that there's something uniquely fascinating about its mysteries. Graphic accounts can be gross, sure, but also comforting, reassuring, informative and funny in ways probably mysterious to men but very important to women.

In a larger sense, it is, of course, as Anna terms it, "cathartic." Traister identifies the phenomenon's larger implications: "Oversharing is in. And for a lot of people who are doing the sharing, or experiencing it, it's not so much "too much information" as it is the next, necessary step in personal-is-political, enlightened honesty about the female body." What may have been rooted, as Traister says, in a touchy-feely second wave Our Bodies Ourselves mentality, in more politicized "reclaiming" of the female body and, more lately, vaginas-are-outrageous shock-value humor is, hopefully, morphing into something neither shocking nor particularly charged.

As Moe says in the article, these pieces are about more than just tampons, female ejaculation and garlic cloves: they're about vulnerabilities, insecurities and fears - a female shorthand that implicitly evokes the biological push-pulls that govern so much of our lives. Such accounts can be frank, but what people are learning is that they are not inherently vulgar. Quite simply, when talking openly and honestly about women's issues, it would be disingenuous and bizarre not to "overshare" about our bodies. The female body will not be ignored: it burbles and leaks and creaks and drips and emits and produces and reproduces and generates and puffs and inflates and occasionally reeks. It is fascinating. It is scary. It is alarming. It is hilarious and silly and mysterious. As the range of experiences in "My Little Red Book," the new "first period" compendium, makes clear, this openness is a stark contrast to the fear and secrecy and implicit judgment that surrounded anything anatomical in the past. So when you're grossed out, just remember: we overshare because we love. And you can always skip the post - at least we have the option.

The Great Girl Gross-Out [Salon]
Earlier: Aunt Flo Visiting? My Little Red Book Demystifies Periods
Ten Days In The Life Of A Tampon
Shejaculation: Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Gush
Where Garlic Has Never Gone Before: Or, How Not To Cure A Yeast Infection

Six of the contributors to My Little Red Book*, edited by eighteen-year-old Rachel Kauder Nalebuff, were convinced that the streaming of blood from their vajayjays heralded certain death — which makes me feel a little less neurotic. Making me feel more neurotic are several stories of intrepid girls who managed to stuff tampons up themselves right away, whereas I spent an entire day crying and yelling, "I can't do it! They look like missiles!"

Perhaps the best story in the book is Ellen Devine's "Hot Dog on a String." Devine writes:

Between moisturizing her legs and blow-drying her hair, my mother paused, placed her right foot upon the toilet seat, reached between her legs and removed a hot dog on a string. [...] It was not the possibility that my mother might occasionally store foodstuffs in her lady parts that shook me. Hot dogs were ubiquitous in my childhood. As far as I could tell they were used for everything from meaty filler in macaroni and cheese to 3-D eyes and noses on the paper snowmen we made during craft time at daycare. It was entirely conceivable that they might also be capable of serving some function in a vagina, though I had little sense of what functions a hot dog or a vagina might have. Similarly, the concept of placing foreign objects into one's orifices was not unfamiliar, as I had a friend who delighted in sticking marbles in his nose. The source of my apprehension and the reason I felt so shaken, was that my mother had inadvertently revealed that there was something I did not know about her.

Even if you do have a rough idea of the functions of hot dogs and vaginas, periods can be mysterious. Which is one reason why some girls dread their periods, some girls crave them, some girls think they're not normal until they get their periods, and some fear they're abnormal when they do get them. My Little Red Book takes a little of that mystery away, replacing it with humor and information — not just about tampons, but also about how girls in Kenya, New Zealand, Brooklyn, and Oklahoma reacted to their first visit from Aunt Flo. The book would make a good addition to a first-period kit — if I'd had it when I was fourteen-and-a-half, I would have felt like way less of a weirdo.

* Yes, the Mao reference is intentional.

My Little Red Book [Amazon]

Earlier: What Should Be In A First Period Kit?

"It is like living an out of body experience," said Seward, 38, "You just cry and cry, and nothing anyone can do will help. You feel ugly and fat and unattractive ... This hormone just takes over your life." Seward says she experienced irrational behavior, irrational thinking, and mood swings, but couldn't remember anything she'd said or done to her husband John, who eventually decided he had to leave. The separation caused Marie to get her PMS symptoms checked and her doctor prescribed anti-depressants. Six months later, the couple is now back together and planning to renew their vows. "I think a lot of professionals remain unaware of the impact that this condition can have on relationships - and I think that is one of the reasons it is not taken as seriously as it might be," said Nick Panay, chairman of the National Association for Premenstrual Syndrome. [BBC]