• Christina Aguilera, a woman who cannot stop releasing songs that are a metaphor for her vagina, celebrated her new found freedom by allegedly engaging in a menage a trois with Sam Ronson, America's favorite gateway lesbian.

Remember how obviously sloppy she was on her reality show Hey Paula? Well, Paula has taken to posting videos of herself—sometimes recorded in the middle of the night—slurring to her fans on a little-viewed YouTube channel.

Today in Tweet Beat, Diablo Cody shares her goals for parenting and Lisa Rinna has a history with Jason Bateman.

Today in Tweet Beat, everybody shh! Paula's got something to say! Also, people are booking JWoww to appear at their weddings.

Today in Tweet Beat, Lindsay Lohan is going on and on about the unfairness of her prison sentence and how her "fuck you" nails were not intentional. Plus, celebs weigh in on Ke$ha's semen photo.

Today in Tweet Beat, Heidi is trying out that "cougar" thing, Mary-Kate Olsen likes it when you tell her that she's pretty, and Adrianne Curry might be pregnant but hopes that she's not.

[West Hollywood, June 19. Image via Hellmuth Dominguez/Pacific Coast News Online.]

[Hollywood; June 15, 1989. Image via Getty]

The Tony awards may be Broadway's biggest night, but between Denzel and Cate and Catherine and Viola and Scarlett and Naomi and Jada, you'd be forgiven for mistaking it for the Oscars. Wait, scratch that: the clothes were all Broadway!

• When asked if she's looking at colleges, Miley Cyrus said she's not going now but, "I'm a firm believer that you can go back at any age you want, because my grandma went back to college at 62 years old."

• Brittany Murphy's husband, Simon Monjack, was found dead last night in the couple's Hollywood home.

• According to TMZ, Tila Tequila is set to join the next cast of Celebrity Rehab for an unspecified addiction, though the show is having trouble attracting any other participants and may never actually air. [TMZ]

• A source (probably Heidi Montag) elaborated on her accusation against Hills creator Adam DiVello today saying, "Adam came up to her from behind and grabbed her with one hand on her stomach and one hand directly on her butt cheek..."

• Teri Hatcher is launching a website for women called Get Hatched, a "chick's guide to life."

• A paparazzo called the police today to report that Jesse James vandalized his car. Jesse told the cops the man has been stalking him, then he and the photographer put each other under citizen's arrest.

Today in Tweet Beat, Kim Zolciak says her bisexuality is not a publicity stunt, Lindsay Lohan has a run in with a cactus, and Larry King is rollin' with Snoop.

Today in Tweet Beat, Conan O'Brien and Sarah Palin discuss how the health care bill affects them. Plus, check out the ass-kissing celebs who wished Perez a happy birthday (interestingly, Lady Gaga was not one of them).

Today in Tweet Beat, Snooki answers followers questions in a video (she will eat "any frickin' pickle"), Justin Bieber hits on Barbara Walters, and Nelly is eating a complete breakfast.

• Sources say Michelle "Bombshell" McGee received $30,000 for her interview with In Touch about her alleged affair with Jesse James, and McGee's claim that she didn't know James was still married to Sandra Bullock is totally bogus.

• Lindsay Lohan is suing E-Trade for creating a commercial in which a boyfriend-stealing, "milk-aholic" baby is named Lindsay. Here's the thing about LL's lawsuit: