The Good:This waist-cinching dress looks fantastic on the original Lady Marmalade. Yes, it's over the top, but bish is singing her heart out!


The Bad:
Back up singer Nona Hendryx: dude, that is a LOT of black leather. Black leather should only be worn with headdresses that enormous when performing pagan rituals, not when backing Ms. LaBelle.


That is also quite the plumage on Patti's other backup singer, Sarah Dash. Maybe backup singers are like bridesmaids: made to look deliberately ugly/ ridiculous so they do not outshine the main event.


The Ugly:
Look, Whoopi. We know you don't like dresses, which is fine. But jeans?! Come on, you can do better. At least throw on a colorful tunic!


Open Caption:
What are these ladies singing about?

[Images via Getty]

But as the decades wore on, the magazine became less and less about America and more and more a celebrity-oriented publication; hence this star-filled edition of "The Way We Were: The '80s" (Previously:the '70s, the 60s, the '50s, '40s and the '30s.) In addition, we found very few Life covers from the '80s, though we did find covers of sister publication Time, so we threw those in. You do what you can!

And now: The 1980s.

Women riding exercise bikes at Krylatskoya Physical Fitness Clinic. Moscow, 1989.

Spin class 1.0! Why are there no shoes here? No Reeboks behind the iron curtain?

Actresses Beatrice Arthur, Estelle Getty, Rue McLanahan and Betty White of television series "The Golden Girls." 1986.

LOL at Bea Arthur's face. She is NOT amused.

Fashion designer Diane von Furstenberg w. fashion designer Calvin Klein & his wife, Kelly at the Don't Bungle the Jungle rain forest benefit concert at Brooklyn Academy of Music. May 1989.

These were the days. Diane von Furstenberg wasn't wearing a wrap dress and Calvin Klein was married to a woman.

Astronaut Sally Ride, first American woman in space, zipped up in "sleep restraint" during flight aboard Space Shuttle Challenger II (STS-7). June 1983.

Creepy but cool.

Comedienne Joan Rivers, in a denim jacket, with her dog Spike at a press conference to announce that she is the new "No Excuses" jeans girl. New York, 1988.

Acid wash denim jacket FTW.

TIME cover 01/05/1987: Corazon Aquino, TIME's Woman of the Year.

Not to be confused with Imelda Marcos.

Drew Barrymore and Mr. T, 1984.

I want this framed. Not even joking. the only thing that would be better would be this.

Madonna, 1984.

*cough*oldnose*cough*

Cyndi Lauper, 1986.

What shall we call this hue of hair? Lemon? Goldenrod? Taxicab?

Patti Labelle, 1986.

Yes. Thank you.

TV talk show host/actress Oprah Winfrey w. her boyfriend, Stedman Graham, chatting w. black leader Rev. Jesse Jackson at Tyson/Spinks pre-fight party at the Trump Plaza hotel. Atlantic City, 1988.

Oprah is saying, "I'm not as think as you drunk I am!"

k.d. lang w. actress Liza Minnelli at a party to celebrate lang's concert. New York, 1989.

Awesome.

Model Jerry Hall w. models wearing bathing suits she designed, at unveiling of her swim wear line. New York, 1988.

Only in the '80s would you unveil your swimsuits on models wearing ballet flats and long scarves.

TIME cover 02/09/1981 featuring model/actress Brooke Shields.

At the time, these eyebrows made a statement.

Model Cheryl Tiegs playing tennis at unident. location. 1982.

Those pink shorts are adorbs.

Model Beverly Johnson, wearing black dress and red hat . and singer Grace Jones, wearing green fur jacket and hat w. sunglasses. 1988.

Aren't you just dying to go wherever they're are going?

Lucia Ahn sitting at the piano with her sister Angela Ahn who is holding a violin at the student concert hall. Aspen, 1987

Asian people! This is from a story called "Whiz Kids."

Actresses Jackee Harry and Marla Gibbs w. track and field athlete Florence Griffith Joyner.

Wow. Just… wow!

Actress Jean Kasem, wearing unusual purple floral outfit. 1988

'80s red carpet: Not boring.

Girls sitting around table in class in School No. 32. Moscow, 1989.

So curious as to what these ladies are doing now.

TIME Cover: 12/09/1985 on Teenage Pregnancy. Photo Credit: Duane Michals.

Every decade: The same cover!

Actors Woody Allen and Mia Farrow w. her adopted daughter Soon-Yi leaving Farrow's apartment to see Liza Minnelli at Carnegie Hall. 1987.

Sigh. We all know how this ended up.

Comedienne Phyllis Diller on the beach. 1981.

What? Where? Why?

Actresses Danielle Brisebois and Jamie Lee Curtis, both wearing bathing suits. 1983.

Who is that little girl behind Jamie Lee Curtis? And is she thinking, "Why is she wearing pantyhose?"

Actress Morgan Fairchild wearing pink dress, reflected by mirror.

Big hair? Check! Off-the-shoulder neckline? Check! Intense pink hue? Check! Giant ruffle? Check! Floofy skirt? Check! Practical pumps? Check!

Life Magazine Photo Archive [Google]
Earlier: The Way We Were: Life Magazine Photos Of Women In The 1970s
The Way We Were: Life Magazine Photos Of Women In The 1960s
The Way We Were: Life Magazine Photos Of Women In The 1950s
The Way We Were: Life Magazine Photos Of Women In The 1940s
The Way We Were: Life Magazine Photos Of Women In The 1930s

• Britney's big eff you to her (chef) dad: Skipping dinner: "Britney thinks that if she doesn't eat much she will lose weight, then people will notice," an insider says. [MSNBC]

• Madonna is honoring Guy Ritchie's request to return to the UK for the holidays, so he can see the kids. But: Surprise! She's bringing A-Rod with her. Merry Christmas! [The Sun]
• Scarlett Johansson is threatening to sue Cosmopolitan UK over fabricated quotes about her marriage to Ryan Reynolds. [Guardian]
• Here's the thing: British Cosmo claims that the story written by Rebecca Winters Keegan had an "additional interview" by Francesca Williams. "Francesca Williams" is a pseudonym, and the "interview" was done at a press junket for Vicky Cristina Barcelona, on Aug. 4, when ScarJo wasn't even married. WTF. [WWD]
• Even Queen Elizabeth is feeling the effects of the crappy economy: They're serving leftovers at Buckingham palace. [Page Six]
• Skidoosh! Jack Black will be on a special post-Super Bowl episode of The Office! [UPI]
• Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber's newborn son has a name! Please give a warm welcome to Samuel Kai Schreiber. [People]
• January Vogue is all, "Yes We Can… Put Anne Hathaway on the cover, smiling like she's high on glue." [ONTD]
• By the by, Anne Hathaway's ex, Raffaello Follieri, has agreed to repay more that $3.6 million back to those he ripped off in a real estate scam. [Yahoo News via AP]
• Anthony Kiedis narrowly escaped kidney failure? [Gatecrasher]
• The news about Nicole Richie getting music advice from Rihanna and Kelly Osbourne? False. But! Nicole does eventually want to record an album. "Right now I have a lot on my plate," she says. "I've really been working hard – going on auditions for acting, doing design for my line, and being a mom – so that pretty much takes up my days." [People]
• Benji Madden and Paris Hilton were seen having a "quiet conversation" at the grand opening of the Dolce & Gabbana boutique on Robertson Boulevard hosted by Rachel Bilson. (?) Are they getting back together? [Yahoo News via E!]
• Someone besides the "Saudi Princess" was there in the Ruffalo death: Another person was arrested one day after Scott Ruffalo, Mark Ruffalo's brother, was shot; but he was released three days later without being charged. [TMZ]
• Dennis Quaid and his wife have settled their dispute with Cedars-Sinai Medical Center over that massive overdose that almost killed their twin babies. The Quaids will get $750,000, subject to court approval. [TMZ]
• Blind item! "Which daughter of a sports legend made a sex tape with two dudes when she was just 16? Lets hope this doesn’t hurt her (non-existent) showbiz career." [Gatecrasher]
• Anti-Scientology protesters tried to make a scene outside the premiere of Tom Cruise's new flick, Valkyrie, but they had the wrong location, whoops. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Meanwhile, Katie Holmes attended the Christmas party in her NYC building, because she is a good neighbor. [Page Six]
• Uh-oh: Uma Thurman's beau, Arpad Busson, is among those swindled by Wall Street deal-maker Bernard Madoff. He lost a lot. [Daily Mail]
• Brandy's 2006 car crash will not go away: A man was was injured in the multi-car pileup is suing Brandy… and the lady who died in the wreck. [TMZ]
• Isaiah Washington is now a citizen of Sierra Leone. [Perez Hilton]
• Click for video of Emma Watson, who says, after Harry Potter ends, "I think I will be ready to do other things…" but: "People just think of me as Hermione." [Guardian]
• Axl Rose wrote a 4,584-word open letter over the weekend and posted it on his band's website; he talks about Slash, the media, Chinese Democracy, and: "I don't see myself as solely Guns, but I do see myself as the only one from the past making the effort to take it forward whether anyone approves or not and giving beyond what many would or fight for to do so...I don't feel any reason whatsoever I should have to throw what I've not only worked for but fought and suffered for away because some hurt, angry, betrayed, misguided and lied to people with a lynch mob mentality, joined by others who could care less (especially in the media), enjoying the controversy and hate, choose one over the other regardless of what's right because they want what they want…" [Yahoo News via E!]
• Tim McGraw says despite rumors, he is not running for Governor of Tennessee in 2010. Maybe later in life, though: "I think I gotta get a lot smarter between now and then!" [People]
• Emma Thompson says her husband is so cheap: "He makes Oliver Cromwell look like Imelda Marcos on a spending spree in the Egyptian bit of Harrod's with Elton John's credit card." She adds: "When I whimper as I watch him pulling his ancient, baggy and fake Calvin Klein pants up over his perfectly formed six-pack to his chin, he snaps 'Oh, stop it. These'll be perfect for the next five years.'" [Telegraph]
• Look for Jennifer Lopez to star in a romcom called Plan B, in which a single woman conceives twins through artificial insemination (her Plan B) only to meet the man of her dreams (her Plan A) on the very same day. OMG what to do? [Hollywood Reporter]
• Reese Witherspoon will star in an untitled project by James L. Brooks, known for Broadcast News, Terms of Endearment and Spanglish. [Variety]
• Six minutes, six minutes, six minutes: Doug E. Fresh is facing triple foreclosure. [US News & World Report]
• Hoochie coochie yaya mama: The Labelle ladies  Patti LaBelle, Nona Hendryx and Sarah Dash  are back, playing a show at Harlem's Apollo Theater Friday and planning a 2009 tour. [USA Today]
• A jury says that three women who own Oscars won by silent film star Mary Pickford cannot sell them; Pickford never wanted the statuettes to be sold. But! Imagine the price those things would fetch? [Yahoo News via AP]
• Kirk Douglas, 92: The oldest celebrity blogger on MySpace. [Reuters]
• Peter Falk has Alzheimer's disease and can no longer run his own life. [TMZ]
• Hollywood private eye Anthony Pellicano's been sentenced to 15 years in prison for spying on the rich and famous. [WSJ]
• El oh el: "A contaminated monkey skull, termite-infested statues and other African artifacts of the so-called reality television show Survivor will not be allowed into the United States." Customs agents seized an bunch of stuff CBS was trying to ship from the African nation of Gabon back to the U.S. [CBS News]
• Mickey Rourke has ordered his tux for awards season: "It's got to have some pink in it," he says. "You're not going to see me ever in just black and white." [USA Today]
• "Brooklyn gets a lot of love. It's time for the Bronx to get a little bit of love too."  Pete Wentz. [Time]
• "I'm still kind of embarrassed to say it, but I had to go and see a therapist for many years and work really hard to find out what made me short circuit. There were just too many things in me that were broken that I didn't know how to fix, so I love my therapist because he took 13 years to sit there with me. I was very ashamed of seeing a therapist because I thought only crazy people went, and then, after about nine years, I asked him, 'Well, was I really crazy?' And he nodded and said, 'You were, but not any more.'"  Mickey Rourke. [Daily Express]
• "I felt the show could not go on any further without having the first black bitch on television. And he agreed."  Diahann Carroll on her conversation with Aaron Spelling about Dynasty. [Telegraph]
• "There are bands that I got into when I was 15, when I was mad at my dad and just wanted to be different. I don't think I'd give those bands half a chance now. But I hold some kind of nostalgia for them that I won't let go. Bands like Minor Threat and Black Flag. If someone just gave that stuff to me and I didn't have any of the associations that went along with punk rock or the angst, do I think that I would just go, Hey, I like this song, as opposed to 'Umbrella' by Rhianna? I'm not sure. I think I would probably go with 'Umbrella.' I'm probably going to get shot for saying that, but it's the truth."  Pete Wentz. [Time]
• "My mates are in a totally different place. I’ve grown up so much over the last few years, and they are still all into going out, and dancing and taking drugs, and they haven’t got work at five in the morning. I hang out with much older people, I go for dinners at posh places and talk about art! I haven’t really talked about this but when I decided I wanted to have a baby, I made a decision to change my life."  Lily Allen. [Spectator]
• "I'm a foodie. I like the best of the best, from sushi at Nobu to cheesecake at Junior’s in Brooklyn."  Jay-Z. [Gatecrasher]

[New York, May 4. Image via Getty.]

The Good:
Ed Burns and Christy Turlington aren't so rock 'n' roll, but gosh and golly they look lovely.
Jerry Butler: One class act.
Dear Michael J. Fox and Tracy Pollan: You make me heart happy.
Does Chevy Chase's wristband mean he's old enough to drink?
I know I should hate Damien Rice's poseur maroon suit. But I sorta love it.
Leonard Cohen: He's your man.
Ben Harper can steal my kisses!
Nom nom Tom Hanks in glasses.
John Mellencamp: Way to rebel and ditch the tie.
Seth Meyers stays classy.
While Richard Belzer busts a move.
Princess of Firyal of Jordan looks like a Tory Burch ad.

The Bad:
Has Miss Patti been vacationing at Del Boca Vista?
God bless Iggy Pop for still rocking the shirtless chest and leather pants. That doesn't mean I have to like the look of it, though.
Joan Jett: See above.

The Ugly:
Even a love affair with Laurie Anderson doesn't compensate for Lou Reed's douchey attitude and leather suit.
Madonna, Madonna, Madonna: What the fuck are you wearing? The sorta see-through dress, the bow tie, the boots. Ugh.

[Images via FilmMagic.]

You know what strikes me as hilarious? That the media who reported on Tyra's interviews with Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton kept referring to it as "historic." Well, that's not exactly what's so funny to me. The funny part is that by "historic," surely they mean that presidential candidates are using different tactics to reach out to certain demographics, and that by going on the Tyra show, they are actually showing that they give a shit about getting the vote of women 18 - 34 years old. But the thing is, I have this sneaking suspicion that Tyrant thinks it's "historic" because a model is being taken seriously. Kinda like how Diane Sawyer went from beauty queen to TV journalist. I mean, that's what I'd like to believe that Tyra is thinking. I mean, perhaps if I had a crystal ball...

But I'm no mind reader. And even if I were, I seriously doubt my ESP would be strong enough to cut through that weave. Speaking of weaves! Let's get to it.

That's a straight up wig, right? And she has some baby hairs covering up that lace front. But I think this is one of those "medical wigs" that she tried to give to Bianca after they effed up her makeover and had to shave her head. It even has a fake part and fake roots.

Tyrapredictably!asked Hillary about body image and past hair 'dos. To be fair, though, the hair thing is kinda interesting.

And for the "Never Been Asked" segmentin which Tyra asks guests questions that they've probably actually been asked before, or questions that are so retarded that other people would be too embarrassed to ask themTyra asked Hillary if she knows how to text message, and whether she would rather be a contestant on American Idol, Dancing with the Stars or ANTM. (Yes, she knows how to text, and she'd rather be on DWTS.)

You know, the whole high brow/low brow thingI get it. I mean, I can't fault Tyra for asking a question about reality television, since it's pretty much my life, and since I'm a girl who rarely ventures beyond the borders of the lower, left-hand corner of New York's approval matrix. And trust me, I'm happy there and feel no shame about it. To me, there's no such thing as a guilty pleasure.

But it's like, when you have this opportunity to make a difference in a rather large way, like delivering an audience to a political candidate, isn't there some sort of responsibility to ask at least one tough question? Or to find out plans or policies or views or something? And that's ultimately what really bothers me about this interview (besides the fact that it was boooooooring). For instance, I know for a fact that Tyra's audience was really interested in the whole abortion issue, a topic that she's way too chickenshit to ever tackle properly. But take a look at all the pro-life crap on her message boards regarding the Hillary interview.

Whatever. I'll leave you with this picture of Barabara Walters' dog Cha Cha. Happy Blue Monday!

Earlier: "Live" From New York: It's Hillary Clinton On Tyra
Tyra Interviews Barack Obama, Invites Herself To Spend The Night At The White House

"Ageless Beauty"


"Flame"




"Enchanted Evening"




"Dynamite Diva"




"Black Majesty"




"Sunday's Best"

[Especially Yours]