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Male Midwife: Women Need Childbirth Pain To "Prepare" for Demands Of Motherhood
New York, 6:29 AM
Fri Dec 11
66 posts in the last 24 hours
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Male Midwife: Women Need Childbirth Pain To "Prepare" for Demands Of Motherhood |
Original material is licensed under a Creative Commons License permitting non-commercial sharing with attribution.
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A lot of people just automatically assume they can't handle it and immediately order their epidurals. Sure, not having pain is better than having pain but there's something to be said for experiencing a natural process.
It's empowering because going through something that intense shows how strong you can be. It's something uniquely female. I don't like it when people (mostly men)cringe when I talk about my sisters having natural births and assume that a woman can't possibly do it without medical help. Then they imply that only hippies give birth naturally and make fun of it as being some ridiculous "spiritual experience". God forbid!
I don't want to sound all high and mighty. I am speaking with what the women around me have experienced. I haven't given birth, I PLAN to do it naturally but who knows how I'll react!
07/13/09
In medical school, I did my time on the OB ward and let me tell you, an epidural birth was such a peaceful experience. The mother was relaxed, not in pain, able to converse with those arounde her. At some point she says "I'm feeling some pressure" and she's told to push. Voila -- baby comes out and gets to hold her baby while delivering her placenta and getting sewn up (if necessary).
However, in the births where there was no pain control, the mother screamed for HOURS. When the baby finally came out, she got to deal with the placenta a few minutes later. And THEN gets to get sewn up and maybe a hand stuck up there to make sure the uterus is evaculated totally. She was obviously in pain, screaming for hours. I have no clue why anyone would want to go through with that when there is a nice epidural which can make the whole thing a much more pleasant experience. Ugh how awful!!
07/13/09
The woman is screaming and crazy-eyed all the way to the hospital. Once in bed, she tells her husband that she hates him because he did this to her, then squeezes his hand so hard that it makes him crumple up in pain. While she has previously said she wanted a natural birth, once the contractions really start, she will scream for DRUGS, and you'd best not delay or she will murder you with her (crazy!) eyes. Then she gets an epidural and lies back on her pillow with a smile, occasionally saying little loopy things like, "Drugs are amazing. I love you." Then the doctor says it's time to push, she scrunches up her face a little, and the baby comes out! She cries, and the next day she leaves the hospital looking just as trim as the day she got married! The end.
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I don't think I want a male ob/gyn or a midwife who has never had to change a pad/tampon in his life and would never be able to have children and I am not taking his advice.I feel his advice/ theory it comes off as condescending especially when it comes from a man. I just find it odd, I don't know any man (even in nursing school) who is into maternity.
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Are modern women "less stoical"? Sure, because we don't HAVE to be! Pain meds are available and should be for those who want them. Few people like pain. Why suffer if you don't have to?
Is labor pain "purposeful"? Of course! It has a purpose. It helps makes the baby come out. But just because it has a purpose doesn't mean it makes you a better parent. That's bananas.
Forceps have nothing to do with epidurals. That's obscene, and no, they're not easy. Breech deliveries do not necessitate epidurals. That's ridiculous. The MD's assertion that women with long inductions should get epidurals because they will "get tired" is as silly as the midwife's assertion that pain will prepare you for parenthood. Ludicrous.
Do women underestimate labor pain? Every single time. If I had a dollar for every time a patient said "I had no idea it would be like this" I'd be rich. Labor is unlike anything most people have ever experienced. When you have nothing to compare it to, the mind tends to underestimate as a coping mechanism.
What's important is that women have choices. You want an epidural? Get one. You're 50% sure you want one? Get one. You absolutely do not one one? Don't get one.
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I guess great minds do think alike!
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Birth experiences are important to woman, and no woman should ever feel that the choices she makes for her individual birth experience are "right" or "wrong." My midwife is going to have a cow when I tell her about this dude. Until he gives birth several times using several different techniques, then he should stfu.
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