The New York Times' "Generation B" column profiles a newly-divorced 57-year-old woman who, she says, is finding the dating landscape dismal.

She has tried social networking, going to dance clubs, reconnecting with friends at her class reunion (all married), waiting for something magic to happen and online dating. "When you're 18, you just jump in," she said. "Now, I worry. What do I need to know about him and what do I need to share about myself - with a whole lifetime to pick from?

Where her husband quickly found a new girlfriend, Christine Shiber is having a hard time meeting a man her age. And, says the piece, this is consistent with grim statistics.

According to 2001 census data, 41 percent of women 50 and over who've been divorced have remarried, while 58.4 percent of divorced men that age are remarried. "That's the biggest remarriage gap for all age groups," said Dr. Francesca Adler-Baeder of the National Stepfamily Resource Center at Auburn University. "Among the divorced, the least marriageables in our society are older women, highly educated who make a good salary."..."Studies show men tend to marry down - someone slightly younger, less educated, making less money," Dr. Adler-Baeder said. "Women in their 50s literally don't have a visible pool of eligible men around them."

It's funny that this piece should appear just as we're starting a fall in which network TV seems determined to overturn the stereotype - or at least firmly embed a new one. Says media writer Julie Zied, this fall's TV lineup is all about "the epic battle of female seduction between the mature (cougars), and the young (kittens)." First, and most glaringly, there's Cougar Town, whose premise and title are cringe-inducing enough to send us running to the safe confines of Lifetime. Courteney Cox is a divorced single mom who, with a short supply of men to hand, sets her sight on the legions of young bucks eager for her experience and wisdom. It's not just Courtney: Zied identifies a whole pack of femmes fatales who seem to fall into the 2-D trap of "sexxxy predatory older woman," from Melrose Place's Laura Leighton to Jenna Elfman in Accidentally on Purpose to Elle MacPherson's steely agency head on The Beautiful Life. All of them are set against ingenues whom they presumably eat for breakfast. The "cougar" trope is as old as The Graduate, but the modern iteration - whose mother superior might be SATC's Samantha Jones - is, theoretically empowering. Whereas Mrs. Robinson was a male fantasy, the cougar is supposedly a woman's, what the Urban Dictionary defines as " A woman who is 35+, sexually cunning, that prefers to hunt rather than be hunted."

The cougar is all about using and losing hapless men and besting less wily younger women. This isn't the First Wives' Club, nor even someone getting her groove back - it's an every-woman-for-herself band of Real Housewives and powerful vigilantes whose creators confuse objectifying men with empowerment and maturity. With, as the Times reminds us, an ever-growing pool of divorced women over 35, do the TV execs this this is what the demographic wants? A woman who's essentially an asshole man, but who presumably has more sexual secrets under her garter belt? And is is an empowering fantasy - or more male-engineered cat-fighting? And does setting up equally ludicrous and superficial standards for women of all ages really do anyone a service? Cougar Town would probably suggest women throw back a few drinks, put on a tighter skirt, hire a sitter, and stop thinking already.

In Her 50s, Looking For Love [NY Times]
Fall TV Preview: Cougars Versus Kittens [FanCast]

It's that word. Cougar. As Rebecca Traister so eloquently wrote for Salon, "aggressive female sexuality is always talked about as feral, often feline. When it's older, apparently, it develops sharper claws and teeth… mindless characterizations of va-va-voom youth seekers who wear too-tight animal prints and talk like children about stalking men as prey is not important, valuable or empowering in any way." And as Allure blogger Erin Flaherty once wrote of Brooke Shields being called a cougar: "Sometimes an attractive woman is just an attractive woman. Can't hot older women just be hot?"

Viewing older women as "wild" "cats" results in unfortunate, often preposterous language of predator and prey. Poor, defenseless men! Scary, aggressive ladies! When writing about the photos from the Bay Area Cougar Convention, SF Weekly's Joe Eskenazi jokes, "beware young gentlemen. Here thar be cougars." Come on. An older single woman is not some sort of bogeymonster, lurking in the shadows, preparing to attack. It's diminishing, insulting and derogatory to characterize them that way.

What you actually see in theses pictures are older women and younger men — single, consenting adults — enjoying each others' company. The men in the images look extremely pleased to be there and not at all like they've been pounced on by claw-bearing, untamed feline females. Sure, there's that one chick with cat ears on, but we go easy on crazy cat ladies around here.

Hello, Ladies: Fur Flies at Bay Area 'Cougar' Convention [SF Weekly]

Earlier: How Do We Survive The Cougar Attack?
Me-Ouch! Sarah Haskins Gets Catty About TV Cougars
5 Reasons Why Courteney Cox's Cougar Town Looks Awful

[Images by Daniel C. Britt/ Painet; used with permission]

Binkley complains that many sites, like ShopFlick, StyleCaster, and SmashingDarling aim to make fashion shopping sites more than just online catalogs, but do so with a target customer between 18 and 34 years old.

She writes:

Are online marketers so youth-conscious — because it feels right — that they're ignoring lucrative markets just when they're most needed? The Internet is neither new nor young. The fastest-growing segment of Facebook users is women over 55, according to the Tracking Facebook blog. And the underlying assumption that young people are still the Web's most fertile market doesn't hold up to scrutiny.

In fact, 65% of online apparel sales go to women over age 35, according to market researcher NPD Group. Among these, the fastest-growing sales are to women between 55 and 64 years old — a boomer population that has always been known for its willingness to indulge.

In addition, she publishes this graphic:

Which clearly shows that there's way more money to be made in the over 34 demographic than there is in the younger age groups. Yet the choices seem to be slim: When it was announced that the First Lady, 45, would be shopping at Boden, commenters said stuff like, "Boden is the costume of a particularly smug brand of privilege..." And a writer for the Telegraph proclaimed the brand "too frumpy" for Michelle Obama. And while Cloris Leachman's line of clothing fills a certain — niche — women don't immediately turn tacky because they've aged!

So why are older women being overlooked by the fashion industry? Why is fashion a young woman's game, when it's clear that ladies of a certain age have the interest — and the financial means? Why is our culture so youth-obsessed? (And is it any wonder that anti-aging products are being shoved down our throats?)

The Forgotten Market Online: Older Women [WSJ]

Earlier: What Should Michelle Obama Buy From Boden?
Cloris Leachman's Clothing Line Is Wild
Related: Boden Is too Frumpy For Michelle Obama

Obviously this is not true. Life is not over. Plenty of amazing women — Susan Sarandon, Joan Collins, Maya Angelou and Hillary Clinton — do amazing things, at ages higher than 44. I asked my mom how she felt at 44 and she said, "I thought the world was mine! I felt that life was going through a wonderful beginning."

Sandra Bullock is 44! So are Monica Bellucci, Courteney Cox, Janeane Garofalo, Melinda Gates, Teri Hatcher, Debi Mazar, Mary Louise Parker, Rosie Perez, Wanda Sykes, and um, Sarah Palin. And in any case, this stupid survey was conducted by Bodyform, a company that makes sanitary pads. So. Can we just take some time to talk about women who don't think life is over at age 44? We must have readers who are over the age of 44 who are proud of things they have done, and looking forward to the years ahead. Or readers who know vibrant women over the age of 44. Testify; we'd love to hear from you.

WomenFeel That 'Life Is Over' At The Age Of 44 [Telegraph]
Why Life Doesn't Begin At 40 [Daily Express]

According to a story in today's Washington Post, women 50 and older almost always tell sites like eHarmony and Match.com that they're looking for a guy 2, 10 or 15 years younger. The ladies are online, and they're looking for love! Galen Buckwalter, chief scientist at eHarmony.com says, "Age, in and of itself, is not a factor in compatibility." And yet! It's perfectly normal and non-newsworthy that men date younger women all the damn time. But women looking for younger men online? Stop the presses! The fact is, older women should date younger men. Here's why:

1. They want to. "What do older women want? Younger men," begins the article. If a woman wants a man with more energy and less experience, why the hell shouldn't she try one?

2. "Older" doesn't mean what it used to. The article touches on the "new biology of aging," noting that when you calculate mortality risk, a 65-year-old woman is the biological equivalent of a 60-year-old man. Ladies with grown children are eating healthy and doing yoga, cardio striptease and Pilates (Looking at you, mom!). The character of the bitter widow or sad spinster hasn't been accurate since way before Mona was the one getting the most action on Who's The Boss?

3. Older dudes don't want women their own age anyway. According to the Post, 50 year-old men are looking for women six to 26 years younger. So a 50-year-old woman had better keep her options open... and "younger" is a pretty smart option. Otherwise how would anyone hook up?

4. To prove they can. It might not be politically correct to say so, but frankly, there's often a power in attracting someone younger than yourself. Historically, older women have been devalued and degraded. Women get the attention when they're hot young things, when they're mothers and when they're wise old "crones." The decades between child-bearing and sunset years? Overlooked. But these women are not dead! They should feel free to prove it to themselves and others.

5. Because we need a better word than "cougar." The image of a sleek predatory cat sort of captures a certain aspect of how some women might stalk and shred an unsuspecting gazelle of a man. But doesn't it conjure a certain single-minded desperation with a sexual focus? What about vivacious, smart, experienced, funny and super social ladies who just want to go on dates and see what happens? Are they cougars? Or are they more like butterflies, or owls, or, um, women? Can't we come up with something better? Maybe if legions of them start hitting the town with younger guys, we'll have to.

Older Woman, Younger Man: It's a Match Made in Cyberspace [Washington Post]

Do women's body-image issues tend to rub off on their daughters? We hope not, because Victoria and David Beckham — parents to three boys — are reportedly on special diets to help them conceive a baby girl. [Babble]

Something to send onto Mom and Grandma: Aspirin in small amounts may provide a lowering the risk of death among older women. [CNN]

More and more female athletes are suffering torn ACLs and no one really knows why. [CNN]

More proof we may have wasted thousands of dollars on therapy. Sigh. [WSJ]