But that's not the only senior moment Joan had. In a bit about gold-digging wives, she referred to Heather Mills as Linda McCartney. Then, when she was talking about how glad she is that Barack Obama's kids are attractive, saying that they're such an improvement over Chelsea Clinton, whose name she couldn't remember at all, so she referred to her as "the Clinton thing."

Later, when discussing Madonna's divorce and alleging that Madonna is so sad and old, someone from the audience shouted out, "But she still has A-Rod!". Joan looked confused for a moment, and then said, "Well, I was on Celebrity Apprentice with Dennis, he's nothing to look at." She totally thought they were talking about Dennis Rodman, a guy Madonna dated over 15 years ago, before she even had kids.

Joan was still funny, but unless she wants to turn the act into some giant meta joke, she should lay off trying to get yucks about senility.

Gross writes that daughters, rather than sons, caring for their parents are still the norm. So when sons do anything at all, they get accolades, while daughters are merely doing what's expected. Moreover, daughters are more likely to do the dirty work of caregiving — they handle the diapers, while their brothers fill out Medicaid forms. Unfair, right? Sure, but Gross tells readers "not to waste energy on this particular iteration of the gender wars." "It is what it is," she writes, "and this arduous interval is a dumb time for a feminist hissy fit. Far wiser to bow to the stereotypes and delegate every male-suitable task you can think of to your brother(s)."

Martha Foley, of Dutiful Daughters (and Sainted Sons), agrees. She says that women get so mad at their brothers during the caregiving process because men suffer less emotionally and are better at compartmentalizing. DD (and SS) echoes this gender divide, saying "Men are pragmatic fixers who prefer stoicism. Women are natural nurturers who show their emotions freely." Foley also tells Gross that "expectations are what create stress. Having no expectations, if you can get to that point, as a female, is the key to good sibling interactions."

So, to recap: women are too emotional about caregiving, and rather than trying to eke out an equitable arrangement, they should lower their expectations — no, strike that, eliminate their expectations. All they can do is assign their brothers "male-suitable tasks" and then go back to being selfless and nonconfrontational. While it makes sense that a crisis in an aging parent's life isn't the time to fight about who does what, surely in calmer moments siblings could talk about fairness. And surely women whose parents are still healthy can start having these conversations with their brothers now. Men aren't "pragmatic-fixer" machines — they're people, capable of adjusting their behavior. But they'll have no reason to if their sisters don't ask.

Dividing the Caregiving Duties, It’s Daughters vs. Sons [NY Times]
Dutiful Daughters (and Sainted Sons) [Official Site]

If a woman lives to be 75, she should be able to chug her beer in a dining room. She should chug her beer in a boat, she should chug her beer with a goat, she should chug her beer here and there; she should chug her beer anywhere. And this is coming from a person who is a stickler about manners! But when it comes to booze and old broads, propriety simply flies out the window. Hasn't this lady earned the right to chug when and where she wants? Anyway, I'm off to go enjoy a beer.

Message In A Beer Bottle [Washington Post]