Jezebel: office politics

Secretaries Revolt, Demand LSD

Dodai — Tue, 18 Aug 2009 19:20:00 EDT

In this ad from the late '60s/early '70s, office ladies are "protesting" for a better copier. Soothe the womenfolk: Give 'em pretty technology! Click to enlarge. [Vintage Ads]

Women At Work: More Holiday Parties Mean More Problems

Jessica — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 16:40:00 EST

It's early mid-December, which means that the offices that still have the dough to hold holiday parties are about to unleash some free booze on their angst-ridden employees. The Root and The New York Post both have articles today about how to avoid humiliating yourself in front of your higher-ups, and the advice basically boils down to: don't forget you're still at work, and don't get too drunkypants. Common sense, but that doesn't always mean that we've always shown our better judgment when boozing with coworkers.

A few jobs ago, I was trying to ingratiate myself with my newish coworkers during the holiday fete. I didn't really fit in and I didn't know anyone particularly well, so I kept trying to join conversations that were already going on. I entered one such convo in media res, and the subject was Wicca. Boorishly, I heard "Wicca" mentioned and blurted out, "Oh my God, do you know any Wiccans? I thought they were all 13-year-old goths." To which one of the conversants responded: "Yes, my wife is Wiccan." Rut roh! I violated one of the major rules of polite workplace relations, which is avoid topics like religion and politics.

But I'm not the only one to have holiday party horrors. A friend really wanted to attend her company's holiday party, and well…there's no way to put it delicately. She had had an abortion earlier that day, and went anyway. She was bleeding heavily and so got drunk off a glass of white wine she had to be taken home. AWKWARD.

That tale is a doozy, but certainly you have your own experiences of drunken workplace calamities. Please, do tell!

Miled' Oh! [NYP]
Office Party Politics [The Root]

Talking Politics Is Now Okay At Work, Except When It's Not

Anna N. — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 15:20:00 EDT

"You’ve heard that rule about never discussing politics at work?" asks the Times' Lisa Belkin. "That’s so last election." Nowadays, one survey found that 67% of respondents thought political discussion at the office was totally okay. Publicist Rachel Kempster used to be bothered by political talk at work. Now she says, "I put an Obama poster on my office door. Co-workers are sending around anti-Palin Web sites and I’m not bothered by it. Everyone around me is wearing their politics on their sleeve." It's always nice to be able to share your beliefs with people, but is this new openness good for everyone? And why is it happening now?

Belkin also tells the story of an anonymous administrative assistant, whose Republican co-worker sends emails "slamming Obama, Clinton and Biden, and started distributing McCain yard signs out of his office last week." This vocal McCainiac is also her boss's friend, so she's afraid to complain. And, of course, there are the perils of assuming others share your views. I tend to test people by saying "Sarah Palin?" and kind of raising my eyebrows. Either they start to catalog her idiotic moments, or they just think I'm insane.

So what's the best way to talk politics at the office? Belkin tells the story of a young Republican at a tux shop, who began lecturing customers on Obama's inexperience. Her boss reminded her "that while the man who had the job before her was, at 49, more experienced, and she was barely into her 20s, he 'didn’t last a year' in the position, and here she was, practically running the shop." Cute, but doesn't exactly answer the question. Belkin adds that all workplace political discussion should be conducted "quietly and politely." But one person's politeness is another's harassment, especially on an issue as sensitive as the selection of the next leader of our country. So do you just keep your mouth shut? Or do you let loose, and worry about the consequences later?

Belkin's piece brings up another question: why are office prohibitions against political talk loosening now? Is it just a function of the kids these days, with their anything-goes workplace culture, their flip-flops, and their iPhones? Or are we talking more because we just can't help it? Is everyone Republican and Democrat so dissatisfied with the status quo that we can't keep our mouths shut, even in meetings? More positively, are people more excited about Obama v. McCain than they were about the lackluster matchup of Kerry v. Bush? If so, maybe things will start sucking less in this country and maybe we'll still have jobs to go to in 2012.

Talking Politics in the Office [NY Times]

Mad Men: Women Are The Ultimate Power Players In Office Politics

Tracie — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 18:00:00 EDT

I kind of love when the guys on Mad Men get really sexist and offensive and act like they're better in the workforce than women, because it only helps to further illuminate how they're not. Take for example, the showdown between Joan and Jane on last night's episode. Both women are well aware just how smart and socially sophisticated the other is. There's no pretending to be dumb when it's just the women interacting with each other, and both women have proven successful at getting the men in the office into doing what they want them to do, and letting the men think it was their decision. It's kind of funny that Joan — intimidating in body and mind — has finally met her match in Jane, someone who she can't really control. Funnier still that it's another woman.

When Does Getting Fired Feel Too Much Like Getting Dumped?

Moe — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 14:20:00 EDT

Yesterday's post about voters' breakup letters to Hillary Clinton prompted a reader to bring up a fascinating topic: being "dumped" by another important constituency that is not your boyfriend, which is to say, your boss. It has happened to all of us or anyway, me which is to say: Male boss hires female employee; male boss grooms female employee in the image of some other female employee with whom he had a tempestuous relationship/used to jerk off thinking about; male boss realizes female employee does not precisely fit the underling mold he had envisioned, male boss finds pretty new replacement and commences walking the long way around old female employee's cubicle in effort to forget he ever hired her. Is this common? And how do you fight back? By sending the whole pathetic story to Jezebel for commenteraderie, of course! After the jump, reader "Lindsay's" sad tale of the pink slip that read like a crap email:

Dear Jezzies,
I just had a knocked-on-my ass epiphany while reading the Clinton-campaign-as-break-up piece.

I was fired last week. Or more accurately, my boss hired a younger, hotter girl, then "realized" he couldn't afford to keep us both, and let me go because I "wasn't a good fit."

I've never been fired before, so I didn't know this, but it turns out being fired sucks. I feel like crap. My former coworkers have emailed and called and taken me to lunch. They all insist our boss was crazy to fire me, that the new girl doesn't know what she's doing, that he's freaking out about an upcoming department review and took it out on me. Blah blah blah. I still feel like crap.

But no longer. Because thanks to this piece, I now see that I wasn't fired. I was dumped.

I don't mean I was fucking my boss. Barf, no. But otherwise, the dynamic is exactly the same. And in hopes that perhaps this will be useful to your readers, I've worked out the details. Behold:

See? It all fits. Feel free to use any or all of this if it will make an interesting post. Ideally, there'd be a piece in the NYT to back me up on this theory, but apparently I'm ahead of the curve on this one. (Right? Right? I mean, it's not just that I'm desperately grasping at straws because I'm depressed about losing my job and trying not to slip into open despair. Ha! Ha! That would be ridiculous!)

I am kinda eager to see if I'm the only woman who's been fired and found out it feels a lot like being dumped, but I realize Jezebel isn't my personal laboratory to research whether my ex-boss is a one-of-a-kind jackass, or just a run of the mill cock.

* The desperation doesn't exactly help.

Uh yeah. I liked my job and I was good at it. For some reason, Jeff interpreted this as me "stressing out about work all the time." Funny thing, my other coworkers all seem to think I was really calm and easy-going. But since he replaced me with someone who forgets what she's doing every 7 1/2 minutes, I can see how my ability to work on something for an hour might seem like a desperate bid for approval. Asshole.

(Yes, as I write this email, I am accidentally falling into an imaginary conversation with Jeff. Sorry about that. But on the other hand, it is super cathartic.)

* He's met someone else who is just better on every level, maybe you should look into that "settling" thing.

Exhibit A: "Elaine," my giddy, 32C replacement. Exhibit B: All the little back-handed digs he made during our final conversation, about how he's heard that this or that much-less-respected competitor is looking for people who do what I do. I was working at the 3M of my industry, and this douchbag was all like, I've heard the black market tape factories in China are looking for help. Maybe you should give them a call.

See? It all fits. Feel free to use any or all of this if it will make an interesting post. Ideally, there'd be a piece in the NYT to back me up on this theory, but apparently I'm ahead of the curve on this one. (Right? Right? I mean, it's not just that I'm desperately grasping at straws because I'm depressed about losing my job and trying not to slip into open despair. Ha! Ha! That would be ridiculous!)

I am kinda eager to see if I'm the only woman who's been fired and found out it feels a lot like being dumped, but I realize Jezebel isn't my personal laboratory to research whether my ex-boss is a one-of-a-kind jackass, or just a run of the mill cock.

I think you'll know where our vote comes down.

My Mentor Dumped Me!

Babies At The Office: Distracting Or Delightful?

Jessica — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 13:30:00 EDT

Bring your daughter to work day is well, any day ending in "-day" for some companies. According to The Guardian, over 80 U.S. companies allow new parents to bring babies to work anytime they want. This information comes from a non-profit organization called Parenting At Work, and a quick perusal of the companies that allow babies at the office shows that most of those workplaces are baby-oriented anyway; for instance, Kangaroo Kids, a retail store for children, maternity and breastfeeding, allows its employees to bring babies to work. But what about bringing a baby to the office when you're a cubicle slave? The Guardian asked three writers who are also new parents to bring their babies to the office, and hilarity ensued.

Of bringing son Thurston to the office, Zoe Williams explains that she wasn't able to search online for something important up because "I am using my Google hand to prop up this baby." Rice cakes get smooshed into keyboards, babies start yodeling in meetings, and everything takes three times longer than it would normally.

It makes sense that in the U.S., where women on the whole do not get paid maternity leave, new parents would be looking for creative solutions to the working mother conundrum, though bringing mewling, puking newborns to the office doesn't really seem like much of a solution for anyone involved.

Bringing In Baby [Guardian]
Bringing Babies To Work

Earlier: Discrimination Complaints By Pregnant Women Are On The Rise

Reader Roundup

Jessica — Fri, 08 Feb 2008 17:30:00 EST

Best Comment of the Day, in response to Girls Gone Wild: Mag Hag: "Every time I see those commercials, selling the videos 2 for $9.99, I always think how sad it must feel to know your tits are on a DVD being sold for less than $5." We say: our tits are worth at least a Hamilton. • Worst, in response to How Do You Deal With Assholes At The Office?: "one of those male colleagues had the balls to comment to another labmate (a friend and fellow Hispanic) about how much easier the minorities have it in academia because we get everything handed down to us. the fucker." We say: the fucker, indeed!

[Image via Oh! My God! I Miss You]

Is There A Piranha In Your Cubicle?

dodai — Thu, 03 Jan 2008 16:00:00 EST

Lawyer Diane Benussi has a warning for "salarymen" who unexpectedly hit it off with a female employee at holiday party: Beware the Office Piranha. According to stories in both the Telegraph and Daily Mail, Ms. Benussi deals with an increasing number of cases which involve single women chasing their baby-daddies for child support. She claims that many of these women are devious man-eaters. "A piranha will hang on for the kill and will rip any man to shreds," says Ms. Benussi. She explains that they look for a "high-earning, high-flying, high-virility man who will place a ring on their finger." Many of these women don't care if he's married or not, she says, and chances are this hookup may have already happened. Like, say, Christmas? Or New Year's Eve? "Office parties are a brilliant opportunity for [a piranha] to lead a colleague astray," she says. "The alcohol is flowing, they can wear sexier clothes and they just generally loosen up." Ms. Benussi swears that, in her experience, it's all premeditated.

"There are women who join companies with large amounts of male employees with the sole intention of looking for a partner, and by that I mean an equity partner - one of the owners of the business. Christmas parties are notorious for people drinking to excess and flirting with the boss or senior manager they've secretly fancied all year. High-powered men who rarely get the chance to let their hair down may find themselves throwing caution to the wind.

And while she may have a point, and some women are calculating how to have a strategic affair with a powerful man, can these women be compared to flesh-eating fish? What about the men who eagerly and gladly participate in the liaisons? Aislinn Simpson of Telegraph actually paints this kind of man as the "hapless male." But doesn't it take two to tango, as they say? Ms. Benussi may call these women piranhas but what do you call a man who willingly skinny-dips in infested waters? (Don't even get us started on the vagina dentata themes involved with women and fish... you know, pisces vaginales?)

Rich Men 'Must Beware The Office Piranha' [Telegraph]
Beware Of The Office Piranha: Male Bosses Warned Of Man-Eating Women Who Are Preying On Them [Daily Mail]

Would You Try The "Coworker Diet"?

dodai — Tue, 27 Nov 2007 16:20:00 EST

A story in today's New York Post claims that the "Co-Worker Diet" is all the rage in Manhattan offices. Basically, colleagues try to lose weight... together! Jacqueline Dolly, a 38-year-old senior director of marketing for a non-profit, is doing it with 10 coworkers. "When you're trying to lose weight by yourself, it's hard to stick to a plan," she says. "But when you have support from people you work with, it's much more motivating." Theoretically, it's a great idea a lot of people eat breakfast, lunch and an afternoon snack at the office.That's three meals, three chances to cut back on carbs, ditch sugar or choose veggies over Oreos. The problem? Most of the time, you only want to shove chocolate in your mouth because you're at work. Dealing with your fucking coworkers. Who are probably the ones who made you fat to begin with.

And while it's great if everyone's on the same page, counting calories and sticking to the program, as soon as one woman says to another, "Oh, you should have almonds instead of that Snickers bar," someone is going to get smacked. There are rules for sexual harassment in the workplace do we need food harassment guidelines as well? (Also, is there a phrase for someone who tries to stop you from having cookies? Like a cock-blocker, but for fatty snacks? Please inform, thanks.)

The Firm [New York Post]
Earlier: Your Coworker With The Candy And Cookies Is Trying To Make You Fat

The Dude In The Cubicle Next To You May Be Silently Weeping

Dodai — Mon, 13 Aug 2007 13:40:00 EDT

Bursting into tears isn't just for chicks anymore! According to a story in the Times of London, one in three men have cried at the office. The story comes in response to a Wall Street Journal piece claiming that weeping in the workplace is gaining acceptance. "Admittedly, tears can be a management challenge for bosses," reads the Times piece, which was written by a man. "In the real world you can shake or hug a weeper into silence, but such responses are not suitable at work." To be honest, this issue could go either way. While it's healthy to express emotions, does crying seem professional? And does it seem unprofessional because it doesn't jibe with the image of a no-nonsense businessman? If a woman cries at the office, does she seem weak and wimpy? If a man cries in the office, does he seem in touch with himself and passionate? One thing is sure: If there was no crying at work, America's Next Top Model would cease to exist.
Does Anybody In The Office Mind If I Cry? [Times Of London]
Related: Read This and Weep: Crying At Work Gains Acceptance [WSJ]

Your Coworker With The Candy And Cookies Is Trying To Make You Fat

Anna — Mon, 02 Jul 2007 14:10:45 EDT

The modern workplace is rife with obstacles. Glass ceilings. Sexual harassers. Unpaid maternity leave. Creepy delivery guys. And eating underminers! The UK's Daily Telegraph reports that your eager-to-please, perky, perfectionist 24-year-old assistant - you know, the one with the big, constantly-refilled bowl of M&Ms on her desk and the demeanor that's just a little too nice? is a size-4, All About Eve-type saboteur in disguise, or, what the Brits like to call, a 'biscuit pusher'!

'There's a girl in my office whom we call the Tuck Shop,' says 27-year-old Lou, who works in television. 'She's always offering something to snack on, and keeps huge supplies of crisps and chocolate by her desk. She's really skinny, too.'

Yeah, what a bitch! We bet her name is Jessica!

What Lou has identified is a 'biscuit pusher': a woman who will buy sickly 'treats' for others and not eat any herself. Perhaps she just wants to be popular with her colleagues. Gabrielle, 35, recalls working with another 'biscuit pusher' - purveyor of office HobNobs, which she never ate herself, almost every afternoon - who was eventually diagnosed as anorexic and ended up in a clinic for eating disorders.

Honestly, that scenario sounds just like the workplace version of when we go grocery shopping, buy junk food, and then sweetly pawn it off on our boyfriends. In fact, it sounds exactly the same. Except for, uh, the 'skinny' part!

Are Colleagues Bad For Your Figure? [Telegraph]
Earlier: How Our Generation Stopped Worrying And Learned To Love Sexual Harassment