Chloe Sevigny takes on horizontals. There's a reason the dame ranked high in yesterday's informal "girl crush" poll.


Yes, yes, it's supposed to be all kinds of "lengthening" to wear one's jeans extra-long like this. But then you can only wear them with the 5" platforms, which mean you only wear them, maybe, once a month, and every time wish you'd just had them hemmed to a normal length. Besides, isn't Brooke Shields tall anyway?


Paul Iacono is working so hard at being quirky that I'm half afraid he's about to whip a copy of Prater Violet and a hip flask of home-brew out of his pocket.


Erin Lucas, now identified as an "actress," was one of the "downtown" cool-kids on The City. (Read: she had bangs.) You can tell by her casually distressed aesthetic, you see.


Olivia Palermo, meanwhile, would never have been allowed to wear such a wacky train-wreck of an outfit in her designated role of "rich bitchy villainess."


The fact that Fern Mallis is the most powerful woman in fashion makes me happy every time I see her in dizzy French-teacher mode!


Ashley Madekwe looks like what an American Apparel ad should be. In reality, she'd need to remove all the clothes ans ten years, and add a major insolent sexy-face.


Julie Henderson's dress kind of looks like a really labor-intensive craft project, the kind at a craft fair that makes you secretly think, if you have that talent, why put all this time into something ugly?


My parents used to have two friends who met in the early 70's in a marijuana addiction group. Byrdie Bell's dress is what I imagine the bride wearing.


Nicole Miller has the confidence of the successful designer. Make of this what you will, she said ominously.


[Images via Getty]

• Funny, this picture of Amy Winehouse looking "healthy and stylish" still looks off. British label PPQ is bringing the troubled singer's long-rumored fashion line to fruition — if you count PPQ "providing all materials and doing the design," as anything like having your own collection. [This is London]

• Here are about 500 words on how Michelle Obama sometimes lets the press know what she is wearing, and sometimes doesn't. [WWD]
• Designers at Sao Paulo Fashion Week have agreed to cast a minimum 10% quota of models of African or indigenous South American descent. Last year, only 2.3% of the models — 8 girls out of 344 — were non-white. The quota will be enforced by a hefty $120,000 fine. [BBC]
• In more news from the annals of New York real estate envy, Sally Singer, fashion news and features editor of American Vogue, lives in an eclectic apartment in the Chelsea Hotel. [The Selby]
• Pat McGrath, one of the sweetest and most talented makeup artists around, was in New York to publicize Dolce & Gabbana's new makeup line, which she helped develop. What McGrath would like most, however, would be the fountain of youth in a pill, or her own, namesake line, like François Nars, Laura Mercier, and Bobbi Brown. One of those things just might come true, in a just world. [NY Times]
• Since Gisele and Tom got married and became 78% more boring, voilà: your new model/quarterback couple is Hilary Rhoda and Mark Sanchez of the Jets. [P6]
• Complicated modern woman Miuccia Prada: "If you compare with philosophy, [fashion] is frivolous, but frivolity may be something good, something that is part of our lives, so I don't dislike it and what I like is the mix, that in your life you can have serious things, [and] more frivolous ones...Beauty is not something that is contrary; it is the right of everybody." [CNN]
• Thierry Mugler earned a kind of fashion comeback when Beyoncé chose him to design the costumes for her current world tour. And why not? Cinched waists, severely cut skirts, and padded shoulders are everywhere now. While Mugler has no plans to re-start his label, which he had already sold to Clarins long before he quit designing in 2000, this profile explains just how a ballet dancer from Strasbourg came to fashion prominence, via driving a van around Afghanistan and living in the Haight-Ashbury in the late 60s. Interesting start for a man who's made all his money from perfume since 1992. [Telegraph]
• "I don't like most perfumes," says Nicole Miller. Which is why she had to make another one of her own! Perfectly logical really. [WWD]
• And Armani, too, has a new perfume. His scent pays tribute to his muses. [WWD]
• How does El Museo Del Barrio in New York raise funds? Why, by getting Isabel and Ruben Toledo to tutor students from Spanish Harlem in art, and then auctioning their work — "portraits of Latin icons like Salvador Dalí and Christina Aguilera," reports Style.com. Also, by throwing a kick-ass party where Gloria Estefan took the stage. [Style.com]
• Burberry, which moved into the space vacated by New York magazine on Madison Avenue, will turn on its big neon sign next Thursday. Designer Christopher Bailey and CEO Angela Ahrendts will fly in from London for the vernissage. Neon signs of this type aren't normally permitted in that part of Midtown, but because of New York's iconic sign, now dismantled, Burberry has a rare opportunity to grandfather its own in. [HintMag]
• Oh, how cute. The Daily Mail have an anonymous fashion mole. Today, s/he reveals that — gasp — models aren't paid very much (but do get to meet a lot of the rich menz, which we of course totally love, since we're all privileged alphas doing this to snag hubbies anyway) and are often required to change their names. For practical reasons, such as our agencies not wanting four "Jennifers" on their books. Shocking. [Daily Mail]
• Aeropostale's profit for the first quarter grew a whopping 81% on last year. Sales were up 21%, and same-store sales jumped by 11%. [The Street]
• First quarterly profits at Gap Inc. dropped by 14%. [WSJ]
• Aquascutum's chief executive Kim Winser has resigned after the rejection of her bid to buy out the company. [WWD]
• Designer denim sales are one thing that is not going soft in the current economic climate — high-end jeans sales grew by 2.3% in the quarter just ended. [LA Times]
• Brooks Brothers luggage: launching just in time to take to Southampton for the opening of the summer place. What a relief! [WWD]
• Linda Morand, who runs this website — probably the best compendium of 60s fashion magazines out there, and the members who scan and post to it care about identifying models to boot — is to be one of the producers of a two-hour television tribute to the supermodels of the last six decades. The idea is to make it an annual event, and impanel judges of industry prominence to induct models into it. I can't lie; I would probably watch this. Especially if it turns out better than the Vogue/VH1 Fashion Awards. God knows I've happily killed far more than two hours on MiniMadMod60s. [PR Newswire]

• The good news: Runway is safe. The bad news: yup, it's on Lifetime. [AdAge]
• Britney Spears cuts a revealing figure in her new Candie's ad. Candie's: the last refuge of a scoundrel. [NYDN]

• In case your priorities are totally out of whack and you don't realize that holymotherofgod the biggest thing in The World is taking place as we speak, the TopShop flagship opens in NYC today. (Which will apparently make online easier for everyone!) Last night's opening gala featured Kate Moss as mistress of ceremonies, but according to the Daily Mail, J.Lo "upstaged" her. [Daily Mail]
• "Gossip Girl's Taylor Momsen and Michelle Trachtenberg worked the rock chic look at the first of the two VIP previews, while British actress Emily Mortimer opted for an Eighties-inspired Topshop outfit and Michelle Monaghan sported a pair of bold shoulders." [VogueUK]
• Was la Moss's triple-Topshop change an homage to Michelle Obama? We're gonna go with, "no." [ElleUK]
• This was obviously the party to have attended, since apparently another Topshop do featured the spectacle of Jimmy Fallon singing Sting's "Englishman in New York." [Style.com]
• Sir Philip Green has proclaimed it the best Topshop evah! "Mirroring the Oxford Circus flagship in London, the four-level, 40,000-square-foot space, with 28,000 square feet for selling, is an eyeful of energetic, packed merchandising with about 2,000 stockkeeping units, a broad price range from moderate to bridge, and dozens of mannequins and forms, either dangling from the high, 30-foot ceilings or sitting atop the alcoves. It's a wide store with columns and escalators, huge colorful illustrations of London icons, and theatrically lit Topshop marquees. Above all, it's the product, and not so much the architecture or decor, that does the talking." [WWD]
• For those in the Apple: apparently the line is lunch-break bearable! [New York]
• "Catwalk exposé Picture Me, which allegedly dishes le dirt on Irina Lazareanu, Nicole Miller, ANTM fave Gilles Bensimon and others, premieres Monday. [New York Post]
• Gucci launched a new scent, Flora, at the Chateau Marmont. Obviously, Zanessa was there. [Style.com]
• Those foot-high boots sported by Heidi Klum in the German Vogue shoot will give us nightmares. [Just Jared]
• Speaking of fashion photography! Zac Posen makes his print ad debut. Quoth the aging wunderkind, "Once Ellen (von Unwerth) saw me singing Cole Porter, laying on top of Lorraine's grand piano, she decided it had to be the spot for the picture." Indeed. [Fabsugar]
• Taylor Momsen is letting life imitate art. Which is unfortunate, because she's on Gossip Girl. Says the 15-year-old of her gig as frontwoman for "Pretty Reckless," "I'm actually designing all of my costumes. It's a rock band, so there's not costume changes but there's definitely a look." [People]
• Michelle Obama wears J.Crew in London. Make of this what you will. [E]
• In almost-as-breaking news: Madonna has been spotted sporting a fanny pack in Malawi. [NY Daily News]
• So why isn't Isaac Mizrahi making those budget basics everyone's droning on about? "People have their basics...I want what I can't resist." [NYT]
• GQ names Mark Ronson the "best-dressed man of 2009." We're gonna go ahead and color this "controversial." [GQ]
• Another rumor/confirmation of Marc Jacobs and Lorenzo Martone's marriage. The tipster in Brazil claims he saw them "taking after-ceremony pictures with a small group of what looked like just relatives and close friends!" I guess now that the bloom is off the Beyonce-Jay-Z mystery, we need another source of suspense. [Update: this was an April Fool's! I was totally, um, fooled. -SS] [Fashionista]
• German retail sales are down. [WSJ]
• But Marks and Spencer's...aren't as bad as everyone expected! [WSJ]
• The retail version of the Carrie Bradshaw wedding gown in which she gets jilted has sold out of Vivienne Westwood "almost instantly." [Sassybella]

• Sean Combs wants to work on a fashion line with David Beckham. But he can't. Because Becks is already working on a sneaker line with Snoop Dogg! [Fashionista]
• Diddy also harasses mom-and-pop cufflink site "Cuff Daddy" for name infringement. Busy man! [TMZ]
• Memories of fashion icon YSL. [NY Times]
• Console yourself by reading about Christian Lacroix who, as a creepy drunk at a bar recently put it, " is not half-stepping either." [WWD]
• CFDA Awards! Francisco Costa of Calvin Klein takes top honors.[WWD]

• In a radical departure from its usual policy of democratic inclusiveness, Chanel excises B-listers from store opening pics. [TMZ]
• Jaime Pressly's fashion line (?!), J'aime, shafts wholesaler, is sued. [TMZ]
• "Graffiti Legend Shepard Fairey" launches morally problematic, hipster jewelry line. [Fashionista]
• Nicole Miller is apparently Cyndi Lauper's "Personal Couturier." [W Magazine]
• Carrie Bradshaw shills for Brazil, nets $600,000. [Fashionista]
• Well, thank God: Tory Burch is launching a perfume. [NY Mag]
• Zac Posen channels "retro country club!" [WWD]
• In an especially rad symbiosis, Steven Alan signs on to design a line for Urban Outfitters. [NY Mag]
• Pantene hangs a huge Rapunzel braid from a third-story window to publicize anti-breakage shampoo. [Fashion Week Daily]
• And in obligatory possibly-balding Naomi Campbell news: she may or may not get pregnant. Some day. [NY Mag]
• Also, pays tribute to YSL, self. [Vogue UK]

The Good:

Eva Amurri knows how to showcase what her mama gave her.
Speaking of which, these are the moments when I can't believe that Amurri's mama Susan Sarandon played Janet in The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Also, how cute is her son Miles?
Yay for Gabrielle Brennan, the appropriately-dressed child of the day.
Damn you, Helena Christensen.
Irina Pantaeva should be rewarded for curbing her nascent Bai Ling-esque fashion instincts.
This is the best I have ever seen Nicole Miller look. Sigh.
I wish I could quit you, Olivia Palmero.

The Bad:
What's with the shiny, tiny pantsuit Hana Soukupova?
Oh, Maggie Rizer: Just 'cause your stepdaddy stole all your money doesn't mean you can't make some effort in dressing yourself.

The Ugly:
I love Dita von Teese. I am horrified to witness Evan Rachel Wood morphing into her.

All images via Getty.

The Good:
This dress is sorta stupid, but also kinda awesome. And it's won by Byrdie Bell, whose name makes me laugh, laugh, laugh.
It takes a brave woman to put red ruffles on her ass, Cristina Greeven Cuomo.
When boho stylings happen to handbag heiresses who are really not bohemian.
Jennifer Creel: The only one who got the memo about playing it simple and classy?

The Bad:
A double-whammy of bad: Carrie Cloud looks like she stole Extra #8's costume from The O.C. and Lara Meiland's dress is irritating.
Doug Hannant is the only redeeming thing about Valesca Guerrand-Hermes's puke green column.
Ahhhhh my retinas! Thanks a bunch, Jamee Gregory.
I think there is a sea creature on Olivia Palermo's shift.
Is wearing a black dress better than wearing a dress with a sea-creature on it? Only Renee Rockefeller can answer that question.
Why did no one stop Susan Shin before leaving the house?

The Ugly:
The time machine broke down and Cynthia Lufkin got stuck somewhere between Tara and Saved by the Bell.
Nicole Miller has done little to disabuse me of the belief that fashion designers are always the worst-dressed ones in the room.

[Images via Getty.]

The top dogs among fashion magazine editors, however, are a little more tight-lipped about their political leanings, though they seem determined to let the world know that Fashion Week hasn't distracted them from their civic duties. Says Alexis Bryan, executive fashion editor for Vanity Fair: "Yes, of course I am going to vote — 8 a.m. before the Tse presentation. And I'll be voting for Obama — though if Hillary wins, I would be absolutely fine with that." Lesley Jane Seymour of More will be making her way to the polls today as well: "My biggest fashion accessory is going to be my Obama pin." But Elle editor-in-chief Roberta Myers would only proffer a "Yes, [I'm] voting, after I drop off my son at school" and Elizabeth Saltzman, international society editor for Vanity Fair, wouldn't name a candidate (though she does admit that she's going Democratic). And though fashion may have a reputation for being frivolous, no one in the industry would deny that fall trends aren't nearly as exciting as the fact that we'll elect a new president come November. Won't it be a lot more fun to think about clothes when the country isn't going down the drain?

Industry's Democratic Face-Off [WWD]
Three's Company [WWD]

• The facts speak for themselves: Heidi Klum is designing a capsule collection for Jordache, for which she has been modeling over the past year. Think she'll offer hair extensions to cover nipples as well? [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Kathy Hilton just released her own perfume. It's called "My Secret." We don't really want to think about what Kathy Hilton's secret might smell like. [BellaSugar]
  
• Gloria Steinem would not approve: Georgina Chapman, Marchesa designer and wife of Halston co-owner Harvey Weinstein, was named "Georgina Weinstein" on her front row seat at Halston yesterday. Only, as Chapman herself put it, "I didn't change my name, they did it for me." [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Jimmy Choo's CEO Tamara Mellon thinks that boyfriend Christian Slater should take a more active, or acting, role in fashion. Mellon says Slater would be "perfect" to play Halston in any upcoming biopic on the designer. [WWD, 1st item]

• One last Halston item! Rachel Zoe, who sits on the label's creative advisory team, wasn't at yesterday's debut show. A rep for the label was quick to issue a statement that Zoe has not been fired. Um, the lady doth protest too much? [WWD, 2nd item]
• Does the fashion industry hate the Bush Administration? Laura Bush is having a luncheon next week for all the designers who participated in this year's The Heart Truth's Red Dress Collection but Nicole Miler, Donna Karan, Carmen Marc Valvo, Tracy Reese, and Marchesa designers Georgina Chapman and Keren Craig have all said that they won't be able to attend. [WWD, 3rd item]
• Is anyone else depressed that Naomi Campbell and Andre Leon Talley collaborated to star and style in a SoBe "Thrillicious" commercial? [Fashion Week Daily]
• Burberry faux-fur parkas actually use dog fur. Fun! [UPI]
• Charges have been dropped against the manager of the Abercrombie & Fitch store in Virginia Beach, who was scapegoated by a cop whose delicate sensibilities were offended by A&F ads. [MSNBC]
• The latest item up for sale under Bono's (Product) RED line: The Mulberry Roxanne bag, done in sweatshirt material (red, naturally), for the Gap. [Sassybella]
• Count Fergie in as the latest face of MAC Viva Glam lipstick. [WWD, 2nd item]
• Brittany Murphy on Mr. and Mrs. Max Azria: "They're a very nice family, with great morals, very grounded. Plus, they'll even invite you over for Shabbat dinner. Who would turn that down?" [WWD, 4th item]
• Model Caroline Trentini has declared that she will be donating a percentage of her earnings from New York fashion shows to the Center of Support of Underprivileged Children with Cancer in her native Brazil. [WWD, 5th item]
• Is model/First Lady of France Carla Bruni pregnant with a son? [Vogue UK]
• Just what the world needed: Chocolate Armani Easter eggs. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Avon profits have dropped by 30%. There is no time for beauty in a recession. [Breitbart]

(Click on any image in galleries to begin the show)
BCBG:



Nicole Miller:



Erin Fetherston:



Baby Phat:



Abaete:



Alexandre Herchkovitch:



Sass & Bide:



Rock & Republic:



Herve Leger:



DKNY:



Tracy Reese:



Diane Von Furstenberg:



Miss Sixty:

• 1. Vera Wang: All I can think of when I see this is Chris and Christian (aka Team Fierce's) "avant-garde" look from Project Runway two weeks ago. It's way too trendy for Jenna and a Texas country wedding. This is a Southern sorority girl we're talking about, here.
  
• 2. J. Mendel: This tiered look screams "I'm pregnant and don't want daddy to know"!
  
• 3. Arnold Scaasi: Could this dress be any more old-school? Whatever Laura wore to marry Georgie Porgy probably looked a whole lot like this. (It's probably what his Barbara wore in her wedding to George, Sr. too.) Jenna may be a Republican, but she's not old. She needs contemporary conservative. Not to be confused, of course, with "compassionate conservative".
  
• 4. Carlos Miele: I can imagine Jenna in something like this; the strapless look is so traditional, and the bottom is full without being princess-y. (Jenna did teach children in South America; she's of the people!) One problem: Jenna's figure can come across as a little square, and this dress may not play up her curves.
  
• 5. Amsale: The girl can drink her Secret Service detail under the table. No way in hell is she going to wear a dress strewn with flowers.
  
• 6. Carmen Marc Valvo: Ooh, cool and modern without trying too hard; no avant-garde aspirations. Just stylish. And thus, possibly too good for Jenna. (See: Southern sorority girl, drinks like a fish, above.)
  
• 7. Angel Sanchez: Interesting detailing in the front, but those spaghetti straps won't be doing Jenna any favors. Pass.
  
• 8. Badgley Mischka: We have a winner! This dress has traditional styling, old-school glamour, romance, and class. And the White House can use all the class it can spin.
  
• 9. Nicole Miller: The bustle in the back, draping across the front, and underlayers peeking out look old-fashioned, but not in a cool, vintage way. Too dated for an all-American party girl.
  
• 10. Lela Rose: The scoop neck is unexpected and modern, but it just might be a little too fashion-forward for the stiff-necked blueblood Bush clan.
  11. Marc Bouwer: This shape might have looked good when Audrey Hepburn played Eliza Doolittle, but Jenna Bush, my friends, is no Audrey Hepburn. (Or John Kennedy.)
  
• 12. Oscar de la Renta: Strikingly similar to the Badgley Mischka gown, this one is a teensy bit more sophisticated. And Jenna Bush just doesn't scream "sophistication."

The Good:

Tilda Swinton looks totally nuts. I love it.

Emily Mortimer is a total coquette. Le swoon.

Brava Ellen Page: The girl has already mastered red carpet chic.

Does Kate Winslet ever look bad? Even when wearing what is essentially a ribbon-belted garbage bag?


The Bad:

Nicole Miller is a fashion designer! Of pretty dresses! So why does she look so M.O.B.?

Sarah Larson is a pretty girl. She is dating a hot guy. She needs to step it up.

Jurnee Smollett's look is definitely the most exciting one of the evening. But not necessarily in a good way.

Yeah, yeah: Catherine Zeta Jones looks good. And Michael Douglas looks old.


The Ugly:

Julian Schnabel gives the stink eye.

[All photos via Getty]

7:55: "Outside I ran into a girl from Boston Magazine who recognized me. She reminded me it is now Boston Fashion week. We would be so front row at that."

• PETA will be protesting outside of Nicole Miller's Fashion Week show because of her use of fur. And in a (failed) preemptive strike, Miller has issued a statement promising that only 12 of 150,000 pieces to be manufactured from the Spring/Summer 2008 collection being shown will contain fur trim. She also promises to be fur-free starting with her Fall/Winter 2008 collection to be shown in February. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• MySpace continues its foray into fashionmania, partners with InStyle, airs release of Paris Hilton's clothing line at LA's Kitson. Oh yeah: This is definitely what the road to success looks like. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• Paper magazine has hired thirteen developmentally-challenged artists to create a window display for Barneys interpreting the Fall/Winter 207 collections. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• Crocs: The clothing line? Noooooooooooooooooooooo. [WSJ]

• Uniqlo! Contest! T-shirt design! $866,290 (approx) prize. Dude, we've never designed anything, but sure as hell are gonna try now. [Vogue UK]
• A bunch of designers — including, um, Scarlett Johansson — have created charms for a limited-edition charm bracelet on sale to benefit Cancer Research UK. [Vogue UK]
• We sorta love the idea of a clothing lined named "To Sir With Love." [Vogue UK]
• The CEO of Perry Ellis says they're trying to catch the trend first and go green with their designs. Uh, hasn't Stella McCartney been doing this for like the past 7 years? [NYT]
• Case in point: Purchase of organic clothing and cosmetics are up by 20% this year in the UK. [Telegraph]
• Kinda barfy fashion news of the day: Lancome's chief make-up artist Gucci Westman designed a signature lipstick for designer Thakoon to showcase during his upcoming Spring/Summer 2008 collection. And it's called Pout-a-Porter. Ew. [Sassybella]
• Pee-your-pants quote-of-the-day: Designer Lela Rose on her favorite look from her upcoming Spring/Summer 2008 collection: "One of my favorites is a sporty taffeta anorak paired with a sweetheart dress made of guipure lace over burlap linen." [The Fashion Informer]

• Jennie Garth and Neve Campbell's hairdresser to shill line of hair care products in infomercials, natch. We think this sounds like an awesome idea... if it were 1992. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Nicole Miller has created a new lingerie line which she's naming "3rd Date" since, we guess, that on the 3rd date people who actually bother to buy designer lingerie sometimes let dudes see it? [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Big for winter: anything and everything with sparkles on it? [WWD, sub req'd]

• Ann Taylor's chief financial officer resigns the day after it is announced how unanticipated drops in sales figures had occurred in the company's first quarter. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Though meanwhile, Ann Taylor decides it should launch a line aimed specifically at baby boomers. Uh, wait: so the two other existing Ann Taylor lines are aimed at who exactly? Above item now makes much more sense. [NYTimes]
• TopShop is being accused of exploiting cheap labor in Mauritius. [Vogue UK]
• Ferragamo's brooding womenswear design consultant Graeme Black has finally made it official and said buh-bye to the Italian design house to design his own collection full-time. Paging Valentino? [Vogue UK]
• Trunk shows, once an experience offered exclusively to the rich and the aspiring, are now moving online, making them available to even poor suckers like us! Ah, the democracy of the market. [WSJ]

• Daisy Fuentes' clothing line for Kohl's has been earmarked by the National Labor Committee for using sweatshop labor. The weird thing is that this is the odd celebrity sweatshop scandal where we are more surprised by Kohl's (does Vera Wang know?) than Fuentes. After all, celebrities who stoop to doing infomercials are not, we bet, keeping close watch of their personal brands. [WWD]
  
• Mariah Carey's new fragrance, M by Mariah Carey, has top notes of marshmallow and sea breeze... like an awesome Cancun bonfire! [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Nicole Miller CEO Bud Konheim seems to be under the impression that if it weren't for the Civil Rights movement, we would have never seen the trend towards the casual in American apparel. Racism, formality of dress, racism, formality of dress: Hmm, tough choice! [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• In commemoration of the 10th anniversary of Gianni Versace's death, a street is to be named after him in Milan and an original dance performance created in his honor. [Vogue UK]
  
• Though Guess is currently experiencing moderate success Stateside, the Europeans are gobbling its shit up. [WSJ]

At the Nicole Miller store in SoHo, "bridal" is sequestered in the back, behind closed doors. We assumed this is because the section is so very, very special — and that this is where they let the free booze flow. Behind those deceptively majestic-looking doors however, only bad fluorescent lighting was to be found.
The bridal shop attendee, one of the fiercest looking girls we've ever seen, asked Moe if she was a size zero. Moe laughed (politely). Then, when the salesgirl left to find a sample dress for Moe to try on, we laughed (impolitely) at the idea that anyone over the age of 10 is a natural size zero.

Dress choice #1: A look made all the more ravishing with the wrong undergarments and black socks.

Moe thinks she could teach Nicole Miller a thing or two and improve upon her design with the addition of a little flannel. Nothing says bridal quite like a buffalo check, we always say.

We think our work is done. The fierce salesgirl informs us this is far from the truth — we have a whole other style of dress to try. This next dress is less-than-delicately handed off, and Moe is shoved into the grimy dressing room.

The hot girl once again insists that Moe is a size 0. (Perhaps she's read The Secret, and simply thinks that if she hopes for it, it will come). However, this latest bout of psychological warfare is too much for us to bear, so payment is made (Moe goes with the first dress. In a size six). And we exit, sadly sober, self-consciously fatter.

Nicole Miller

• Designer Nicole Miller, Harper's Bazaar's Glenda Bailey, and other fashion poohbahs hit D.C. yesterday to discuss a bill to protect fashion designs under intellectual property laws. We were all for this until we learned the measure "could have an impact on retailers such as H&M and Zara, which reinterpret runway designs and trends to sell to the public at lower prices." Girls, go call your congressman now and complain. Recreated Prada for the people, please!!! [WWD]
• Want to know the price points for Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen's line The Row? Items range from $360 for leggings to $3220 for fur coats. God, we hate anorexic, midget millionaires. [WWD]
• The latest Kate Moss for Topshop news [Ed: Only 4 more days!]: Kate herself is rumored to be appearing in the windows of the store's Oxford Street store on the big release day, modelling her own designs. [WWD, 2nd item]
  

• Pretentious Chanel designer Karl Lagerfeld shoves stick further up his own ass and announces that Chanel label will be sponsoring French artist's Sophie Calle's representation at this year's Venice Biennale art fair. [WWD]
• Expensive, earthy-crunchy, recently-defunct label Project Alabama is staging a revival. But instead of being produced by laborers throughout towns in Alabama (hence the name), manufacturing is moving to India. [WWD]