• In an interview with The Insider that airs tomorrow, Hailey Glassman says her boyfriend Jon Gosselin will "take his anger out on me... He has 'mantrums.' I shouldn't have to put up with being emotionally abused."

• "...I cry and say, 'Why are you so mean to me?'" Hailey says people have been criticizing her since she started dating Jon and "I get threats everyday. I get called a home wrecker and a fat whore. People will stare or point. It gets worse everyday." Yet, she still doesn't want to leave him. "I don't want to leave him all alone," she says. "At the end of the day, I love him but I dislike him at times. When I love someone I would never hurt them." There's a tear-filled preview here. [People, The Insider]
• Jon Gosselin's former nanny/lover Stephanie Santoro says she saw Jon smoking pot when the kids were in the house. "He said they were in bed and that he was out back smoking when we got there," says Santoro. "It was just Jon there that night with the kids…[Jon said], ‘That wore off quick – but it was just seeds…My good stuff is in New York." [Perez Hilton]
• On The Ellen DeGeneres Show Ellen asked Kate Gosselin about dating again and she said, "I'm not thinking about it, but the thought has crossed my mind at some point [that] it's going to be scrutinized... Let's not talk about it." [People]
• Jon Gosselin's rep denied In Touch's claim that a Jon Gosselin-Nadya Suleman reality show is in the works, but a rep for the reality show insists, "We've been developing this show for months." He says Jon is only denying it because, "After someone brings it to the media, it just freaks people out, but we're not BS-ing. This is going to end up on a network. We're talking to all four of them...Fox, ABC, NBC and CBS." The source says the show would start off as a one-time special and "We're even talking about scheduling it around the Superbowl. We think it could be that big. We think it could be American Idol-type" big. [E!]
• Katie Couric is dressing as Aaden Gosselin for Halloween. "I met Kate and she seems very nice," Couric said, "and I told her I was gonna be Aaden, and she said, 'You have to make sure you wear the glasses at the end of your nose.'" [Extra]
• Jessica Simpson just can't catch a break. Now PETA is giving her "whale-sized grrrs" for performing at Sea World. [U.S. News]
• Ed Meyer, who is producing a mockumentary called How I Married Jennifer Lopez: The J-lo and and Ojani Noa Story, says he intends to sell home videofootage of Jennifer Lopez and Ojani Noa. [The Wrap]
• The LAPD has handed over the "Hollywood Hills Burglar Bunch" case to the District Attorney, who said he'd file charges against Courtney Ames, Nick Prugo, Diana Tamayo, Roy Lopez Jr. and Alexis Taylor later today. [TMZ]
• Add Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green to the list of celebrities robbed by the "Burglar Bunch." Green's gun and some of Fox's t-shirts were stolen from his home recently, but he didn't realize there had been a break in because he was out of town shooting a movie. [TMZ]
• This Is It has already earned $2.2 million from late-night screenings, which distributor Sony calls "unprecedented" for a Tuesday in October. [AP]
• According to Dr. Arnold Klein's medical records he injected Michael Jackson with an intra-muscular drug labeled "I.M. Injection" 51 times in three months. An L.A. dermatologist says "I.M. Injection" is commonly used as billing code for Demerol. [TMZ]
• A medical board investigator testified today that Dr. Sandeep Kapoor kept a stash of Anna Nicole Smith's medical records hidden in his kitchen and on the floor of a closet at his home. The files had notes like, "opioid dependence on methadone" and "benzo addicted? To avoid" that were not included in her official medical records at his office. [AP]
• The People cover featuring Nicole Richie and her new baby was one of the mag's worst-selling issues. Just over a million magazines were sold, compared to People's usual average of 1.4 million a week. She was reportedly paid in the "mid-six figures" for the photos. [N.Y. Post]
• Bob Barker donated $1 million to Drury University to establish a professorship on animal rights that he hopes will lead to a full undergraduate degree program. [AP]
• Check out Adam Lambert's new album cover here: [Buzzfeed]
• Lisa Kudrow will guest star on Cougar Town as a "mean" dermatologist who treats Courteney Cox's character. [N.Y. Post]
• Kanye West and animator/cartoonist Bill Plympton are releasing a book called Through the Wire: The Words and Lyrics of Kanye West next month, which includes illustrated versions of 14 of Kanye's lyrics along with commentary "that gives insight into the man that we know." [Publishers Weekly]
• Jim Weatherly, the man who wrote "Midnight Train to Georgia," sings the original version. [Extra]
• Abigail Breslin will star as Helen Keller in a Broadway revival of The Miracle Worker with Alison Pill playing Annie Sullivan beginning in February. [N.Y.T.]
• Hayden Christensen and his brother Tove have filed a lawsuit against producer Philippe Martinez, who claimed to have secured $250 million for the production and distribution of independent films. They had entered into an agreement with Martinez to give him first-look rights to film projects from Hayden's Forrest Park Pictures. [The Wrap]
• Stephanie Pratt was formally charged with suspicion of DUI today. She was arrested two weeks ago after two breathalyzer tests registered .08 and .09. If convicted she could face up to six months in jail and a $1,000 fine. [TMZ]
• According to The National Enquirer, Josh Duhamel has been cheating on Fergie. He's having an affair with a "buxom, blonde stripper" named Nicole Forrester who claims their fling started when Josh introduced himself as "JD" and said he was in town making a porno movie. [National Enquirer]
• When asked if she and Taylor Lautner are dating, Taylor Swift said, "I don't know, he's an amazing guy and we're really close … and ah … yep... We're in a movie together and I am really excited about seeing it." [People]
• Denise Jonas says her son Kevin Jonas is marrying "the right girl." She says she's very similar to his fiancée Danielle Deleasa and she teases Kevin, "You're marrying your mother – but she is just thinner and prettier." [People]
• The recession is hitting everyone hard. 50 Cent says, "I buy diamonds on a very regular basis, but now I am selling my old stuff before I get something new. These are times when you learn about the value of money." [The Telegraph]

• This is not surprising: Nick Prugo, the 18-year-old accused of burglarizing Lindsay Lohan's house, was seen hanging out with Lindsay on the set of Labor Pains at least 10 times.

In other words: She knows him. She wasn't robbed by strangers. [TMZ]

• David Hasselhoff claims the reason he passed out Sunday afternoon was not because of booze, but because of an ear infection. Well, you know, medication for an ear infection, combined with a med that keeps alcoholics from drinking. That's why daughter Hayley found him unconscious. He says. [Page Six]
• Brad Pitt is in talks to play nemesis Moriarty in a Sherlock Holmes sequel. [Reuters]
• Where were the 8 kids while Kate Gosselin was taping her new TV show? In the care of nannies. It was her weekend. Jon Gosselin was in the Hamptons. [MSNBC]
• A source on the set of Kate Gosselin's new TV show says "she was very shy" and "she was very low-key." The View-style program features Gosselin, Paula Deen, comedian Judy Gold, former Early Show coanchor Rene Syler and newsman Bob Woodruff's wife, Lee Woodruff, talking about issues relating to motherhood. [E!]
• According to this report, Kate Gosselin burst into tears when a picture of her kids was flashed on a screen and filming of her new show had to be halted. A source says: "She hates being away from her children, but now that she's to be divorced, she has to work to support them. She was very sad, emotional and very guarded." [Page Six]
• Michael Jackson's This Is It film will include a new song, which Michael wrote for the tour. [Showbiz 411]
• The entire L.A. Lakers basketball team: Invited to Khloe Kardashian's wedding on Saturday. [TMZ]
• SHOCKER OF THE YEAR: Kevin Jonas will have two best men at his wedding: Brothers Nick and Joe. [People]
• Chloë Sevigny and Jason Segel: It's on. [E!]
• Whatever you do, don't strip down and shake your jiggly bits at Martha Stewart. She went to a performance of Hair and was so shocked by the nude scene, she said "I'm having a meltdown" at intermission, and didn't stay for the second half of the show. [Gatecrasher]
• Marc Anthony is so excited about becoming a part owner of the Miami Dolphins that he's purchased a waterfront condo in Miami. But don't worry: He and wife Jennifer Lopez aren't exactly moving there: "We are not selling our homes in New York or Los Angeles, we are just adding Miami." Recession, schmecession! [People]
• BREAKING: Russell Brand was spotted eating a banana at Fort Worth airport on Sunday. [Gatecrasher]
• Dakota Fanning's little sister, Elle Fanning, will make $125,000 for her role in upcoming movie Somewhere. Not sure why this is news, except that TMZ wanted to use the headline, "Dakota Fanning's Kid Sis Makes More Than You." [TMZ]
• A pharmacist at a Valley Village pharmacy refused to fill a drug order for Anna Nicole Smith five months before she died. Her psychiatrist was requesting two  sedatives, 300 tablets of methadone, a muscle relaxer, an anti-inflammatory drug and four bottles of a painkiller nicknamed "hospital heroin." The pharmacist later recalled thinking, The amount and combination alarmed the pharmacist, who later recalled thinking, "They are going to kill her with this." He called her doctor and said he would not fill the prescription, because it was "pharmaceutical suicide." [LA Times]
• Jesse Metcalfe will reprise his role on Desperate Housewives, if you give a crap. [UPI]
• Bijou Phillips plays the love interest of Chris Masterson in new flick Made For Each Other, which also stars her fiancé (and Chris' brother) Danny Masterson. Awkward? [Page Six]
• Chaz Bono has signed a six-figure deal for his memoir, which will detail his decision to transition from female to male. [TMZ]
• Rob Lowe's not that excited about St. Elmo's Fire being made into a TV show. He says: "Outsiders is the one they should be doing. The Outsiders was always my favorite, particularly now with the passing of Patrick Swayze." [E!]
• Julianna Margulies plays the wife of a politician busted in a sex scandal in The Good Wife, a CBS show premiering tonight. On the show, her character stands by her man. But Julianna says: "My reaction would have been to get the hell out of there. Until I put myself in her shoes - since I've been playing her - everything has changed. And since I've had my own child. It's not just about your feelings. The thing I love about her is that she's always balancing things. It's just survival." [USA Today]
• Lucinda Williams married boyfriend and manager Tom Overby on stage in front of 1,500 fans in a club in Minneapolis on Friday. "After saying their vows and sealing the deal with a kiss, the bride – dressed in knee high black boots and a short black satin dress – performed a song she had written for her groom." [People]
• The jury's been picked for the trial of two people accused of trying to extort $25 million from John Travolta following his son's death in the Bahamas. Travolta is on the list of witnesses that could be called to testify. [NY Daily News]
• Nadya "Octomom" Suleman does yoga in front of the cameras camped out near her house. [NY Daily News]
• Filmmakers were following Susan Boyle as she sang "Wild Horses" for her US debut on America's Got Talent; the event is being turned into a documentary. [NY Post]
• Nathan Fillion is hot. Does anyone watch Castle? Interview with Captain Hammer, aka Captain Malcolm Reynolds, at the link. [PopWrap]
• "Dannii Minogue became dependent on Botox after she fell into a depression over her sister Kylie's cancer…" "My sister was sick, then my best friend died soon after - I felt I'd been hit by a wave. I couldn't deal with the stress. I couldn't deal with having to look at my face." [The Sun]
• Estelle Getty's Emmy is on eBay! The Academy of Television Arts & Sciences is trying to get it taken off; they'd rather have it back if individuals or heirs don't want it. [Variety]
• Jenna Jameson's lawyer claims she owes $72,312.36 from her divorce from porn kingpin Jay Grdina [TMZ]
• Creepy: In an interview with David Carradine a few months before he died, he said that he believed the the "ghost" of his wife Annie's dead husband visited him from the couple's bedroom closet. [NY Post]
• "We spent a chunk of time together, and became friends, but [the collaboration] never happened. I wrote a bunch of words and presented them to him, and he didn't want to go there. He didn't want to be provocative. And I said, ‘Well, why come to me?' I mean, that's like asking Quentin Tarantino to not put any violence in his films." — Madonna, on working with Michael Jackson years ago, to the Times Of London. [MSNBC]
• "John and I always thought of our own covers. This time, Sean said, 'I'm doing it,' and he did it. He's an artist too. I didn't want to be that overwhelming Yoko Ono trying to control the scene. I'm a control freak, in a way, especially with my artwork and music. This time, I had to get to another level, a spiritual level of understanding. It's out of love for my son. He's a good one; he has his own ideas." —Yoko Ono on the cover art of her new album, Between My Head and the Sky.
• "Writing about Python is self-serving and vain, I said, and there are bad things about it as well; but these PR people are agents of the devil and she would not be shaken off." — from an essay by Eric Idle. [Telegraph]
• "So many performers sacrifice their entire life for the stage - I mean, look at Michael Jackson. I'm not in his league, but I do know the cost of fame. I lost a piece of life, normalcy. It's easy to become an android in an artificial world of flashing lights and magazine covers. Being away from it all allowed me to refocus my creative energies. There was a girl I was in love with, I wanted to marry her… It didn't work out. I was devastated. Thank God I had my music as an outlet." — Maxwell. [NY Post]
• "My dog Vivian passed away last year. I went to do this spreading of her ashes at her favorite place on the beach. I was reading this Eugene O'Neill eulogy and I took out the bag of ashes and the wind came and all the ashes went in my face. I had, like, a mouthful of Vivian. I just stood there and went, ‘This is genius, actually. This is totally perfect and humorous.'" — Drew Barrymore. [MSNBC]

[Washington, D.C., August 24. Image via Getty]

Young fans listen as Nick Jonas, singer, songwriter, actor and member of the Grammy-nominated band the Jonas Brothers makes remarks on his personal experiences living with and managing his juvenile diabetes and his efforts to inspire other youth dealing with diabetes to manage their disease on August 24, 2009 at the National Press Club in Washington, DC. AFP PHOTO / Tim Sloan (Photo credit should read TIM SLOAN/AFP/Getty Images)

• Jessica Biel is "the most dangerous celebrity to search in cyberspace," according to security software firm McAfee.

Searching for "Jessica Biel photos" or "Jessica Biel videos," you have a one in five chance of landing on a site that's got spyware, adware, spam, phishing, viruses and other malware. Last year Brad Pitt was number one. This year poor lonely Jennifer Aniston is number 3, behind Beyoncé. [MSNBC]

• In The UK, Whatshername is the most dangerous. [Telegraph]
• Sensitive headline of the day: "IT'S JACKO-CIDE!" [NY Post]
• Cops say that Dr. Conrad Murray waited 82 minutes after Michael Jackson had stopped breathing before dialing 911. Record show that Dr. Murray was on the phone for 47 minutes — in three separate calls — before dialing 911. [People]
• La Toya Jackson will do a one-on-one interview with Barbara Walters, to air Friday, September 11. La Toya released a statement which reads: "I am thankful to the investigators for uncovering the truth to the world, and I look forward to the day that justice will be to served to all the parties involved in my brother's homicide." [ABC News]
• Susan Etok, A doctor from the UK is saying that Michael Jackson wanted to get her pregnant: "He wanted to use his sperm and my eggs to become a dad again. "He was really fixated on my genes." [The Sun]
• Dr. Etok also has written a letter to President Obama, urging him to consider "harsher punitive measures" for "unethical Doctors." [TMZ]
• More evidence that Michael Jackson was not broke, but cash poor. [TMZ]
• "I've known Michael for over a decade and there were times when I could not wake up Michael Jackson." — Uri Geller. [Mirror]
• Janet Jackson will chair the AmfAR event in Milan during Fashion Week. [WWD]
• Kate Gosselin will be on Larry King Live tonight. Are we sick of her yet? [ET]
• On September 14, Oprah Winfrey will announce her first new book club pick in over year. She Tweeted she had "never made a selection like 'this.'" [USA Today]
• The father of Ryan Jenkins says: "If my son was guilty, he was crazy… He was not the boy we knew. The boy we knew was not capable of anything remotely close to this act." [E!]
• Pop star and juvenile diabetes spokesperson Nick Jonas wants to be president. "As much as I joke about it and kind of say it to get a laugh, it is somewhat serious. I don't know if it will happen." [Reuters]
• Crash diet alert: Leonardo DiCaprio is working on an action flick called Inception, directed by The Dark Knight's Christopher Nolan. Apparently there's a scene in which he needs to appear "emaciated," so Leo is cutting back calories and exercising rigorously. [Radar Online]
• Speaking of weight loss, Mark Wahlberg is worried that Christian Bale, his costar in The Fighter, has dropped too many pounds to play a drug-addicted boxer. God, remember The Machinist? [MSNBC via National Enquirer]
• Robin Williams will not be putting on a wig and pantyhose to play Susan Boyle in a biopic, despite what you may have heard. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Kari Ann Peniche, the woman in the Rebecca Gayheart/Eric Dane video, may have effed up by signing a deal with E! for an exclusive interview, and then talking to some magazine. [Gatecrasher]
• Mickey Rourke: Delayed at JFK security on his way to Bosnia. Screeners rifled through his bags and asked him how much money he was carrying. [Gatecrasher]
• Britney Spears took her kids on a pedicab ride through Central Park. [Gatecrasher]
• Bronx Wentz may go into show business. He's been going to work with his mom Ashlee Simpson on the set of Melrose Place and she says: "I'm all about whatever it is Bronx likes to do and wants to do. Definitely going to follow what it is that he loves and hope to be a great parent in that way." [E!]
• David Letterman's former nanny has written a book called Harry and Horsie, based on a homemade gift for Letterman's son four years ago. [USA Today]
• Shia LaBeouf and his Wall Street 2 costar Carey Mulligan: It's on. [Gatecrasher]
• Bob Dylan is in talks with some car companies about being the voice of their GPS systems. He joked that it would probably sound like: "Left at the next street. No, right. You know what? Just go straight." Then he said: "I probably shouldn't do it because whichever way I go, I always end up at one place - on Lonely Avenue." [Mirror]
• Kim Kardashian will executive produce a reality show about her publicist pal Jonathan Cheban. Behind-the-scenes drama! [Page Six]
• Magician David Blaine wasn't rescued by lifeguards from rough surf over the weekend, he was "escorted." "I did swim back by myself," he notes. [Page Six]
• Katy Perry is talking about her boobs again; this time she auctioned a cast of them for charity and claims: "They had to get extra plaster to cast them because they are so big.I was very proud because it was early in my career and they fetched 3,500 dollars, which I think is pretty good." [The Sun]
• Guess who's (maybe) getting her on TV show? Candy Spelling. A scripted show, not a reality show. Candy says, "I wouldn't do a reality show." And! Daughter Tori Spelling says if her mom did get a show, "I wish her the best." [Radar Online]
• Eddie Cibrian's estranged wife to LeAnn Rimes: "He's all yours." [UPI]
• "Eddie is a compulsive liar, cheater and a home wrecker. And he has been an absentee father." — Eddie Cibrian's wife, Brandi Glanville. Estranged wife, that is. [MSNBC via Us Weekly]
• Is this a joke? Pauly Shore has a reality show called Adopted, about his efforts to adopt an African child. [Page Six]
• Lisa Marie Presley's nanny claims she was forced to work 7 days a week without meal breaks or getting overtime. [TMZ]
• Poor 87-year-old Jack Klugman is still trying to get cash from doing TV Show Quincy, M.E. from 1976-1983. This is his second lawsuit over this issue. [Reuters]
• Whatshername is pregnant again?!?!?! [Telegraph]
• "I never really criticized John… He was a very soft-centered guy and we had a lot more in common than people think." — Paul McCartney on John Lennon. [Mirror]
• "Thankfully my sister is with her… I talk to either my sister or my mother, if she is able to talk, every day and sometimes more than once,. But it's been bad. I was trying to get away two weekends ago and then, pow. Something came up with Lifetime and they wanted me to do something and I just - I am very loyal to them. Whatever they want, I'll do it." — Tim Gunn's Project Runway schedule has been keeping him from his dying mother. [MSNBC Scoop]
• "I have to confess I always hated any person from Scotland who went and lost their accent in the slightest. But I've spent a year-and-a-half now playing roles as an American and I'm not comfortable enough doing those accents only when we film, so I have to keep it up all the time. I really hate myself for doing that." —Gerard Butler. [Mirror]
• "I love to spoil Harlow." — Joel Madden. [Page Six]
• "I feel empowered. Finally. When you don't believe in yourself, you feel like you're living in fear. You don't give yourself the opportunity to believe that you can. And as much as you tell yourself you can't do it, you end up not doing it. Me? I was complacent and comfortable where I was. Here, sometimes it's like my music didn't quite work, but overseas it's on top of everybody's chart. I've had more international success than domestic success, and I think that opens my eyes up to music. I mean, I just got back from performing in Lebanon. Lebanon!"— Kelly Rowland, who sings three tracks on French DJ David Guetta's One Love. [USA Today]
• "I mean this from the bottom of my heart: I don't care if I win. I'm not doing this to try and prove that I'm better than someone else at something, I'm doing it because it scares me. Dancing is something that I've always really wanted to be able to do, but never had the confidence and the technique, if you know what I mean. I'm not very graceful, so it's just something that absolutely terrifies me - and it's the main reason that I kind of wanted to do it."— Kelly Osbourne, on Dancing With The Stars. [Daily Mail]
• "Yes, it's true, I don't date Black men. I never have. It's not a prejudice. It's just a personal preference. People always think that Big Papa is Black. I don't know why. I've never dated a Black man. It's not to say it wouldn't happen in the future, but at this time, I never have." — Real Housewife Kim Zolciak. [ONTD]

• Mischa Barton's former friend Nicole Richie is helping her get her life back together after her recent meltdown. Nicole, "stepped in and talked to her about making changes in her life… basically doing a 360," says a source.

• "Mischa isn't even smoking anymore, thanks to Nicole... Nicole told Mischa that she has to straighten up because she has a lot riding on this new show," added the source. We hate to question an anonymous source, but it seems her math is a little off there. [Radar Online]
• Maybe the rumors are true: Mischa Barton is scheduled to return to work on The Beautiful Life later this week. Her rep says she "will be resuming production as planned with the rest of the cast in NYC. She's back to business as usual." [People]
• Jessica Simpson said she's not going to ask Tony Romo to return the $100,000 boat she got him for his last birthday. She explained, "I'm not an Indian giver." [TMZ]
• Joe Simpson says Jessica Simpson is "doing very good," since the breakup and she got a 5-carat diamond ring this weekend from a random jewelry designer at a party. What more could a girl want? [E!]
• "Jen romping with so publicly with Butler is like stabbing a knife through Brad's heart," claims a source, because as we all know the only reason Jennifer Aniston continues to pursue romantic relationships is to make Brad Pitt jealous. [ONTD]
• Just so you know, Brad Pitt bought another motorcycle. [The Daily Mail]
• Some are interpreting a reference Miley Cyrus made on Twitter to a John Mayer song to mean that she's going to break up with Nick Jonas for Justin Gaston... or something like that. We can't spend anymore time trying to make sense of a 16-year-old's Tweets. [People]
• Apparently Demi Lovato is still friends with Miley Cyrus even though she just broke up with her brother Trace Cyrus. Lovato says, "Recently [Miley] sent me this four-page text message encouraging me and telling me she has faith in me. It was so inspiring and made me feel great – because I do get a bit overwhelmed by the paps sometimes." [People]
• Amy Winehouse is shipping all of her equipment back from the Caribbean so she can set up a new studio and start recording her third album. [The Sun]
• Now that their divorce is finalized, Blake Fielder-Civil continues to spill details about Amy Winehouse. He says of the first time she tried heroin, "We had a bottle of pink champagne and had sex and were lying on the bed together talking. I'd been smoking heroin on my own before that, but never in front of her. I got a bit for myself, and she looked at me and said, 'Can I have some?' I was out of my mind on drugs and I said, 'Of course'. She inhaled the heroin and then just sat back, smiled and her eyes went a bit funny. She said, 'I can see why you take this'. Amy took to heroin like a duck to water, same as me." [The Sun]
• DEA agents raided Dr. Conrad Murray's home in Las Vegas today looking for Michael Jackson's medical records. An agent spoke to the press and said Dr. Murray was home during the raid. [TMZ, TMZ]
• A spokeswoman for Dr. Conrad Murray's lawyer said, "It's a waste of time responding to all these timed ‘leaks' from ‘anonymous' sources... I have no doubt they want to make a case – for goodness sakes, it's Michael Jackson - but things tend to shake out when all the facts are made known." [Radar Online]
• According to Brody Jenner he doesn't hang out with Lauren Conrad anymore. "I haven't seen much of her since she left the show," said Brody. It's almost like the producers of The Hills were forcing them to hang out. [E!]
• Apparently this L.A. Candy movie is all part of Lauren Conrad's master plan. "Lauren's goal is to get into producing – it always was," says a source, "It was always to make L.A. Candy into a film or TV show. She's been in talks about it." [People]
• Daniel Bark, the man who allegedly hit and killed American Idol hopeful Alexis Cohen has been charged with aggravated manslaughter by causing the death of another while fleeing from law enforcement officers, vehicular homicide and eluding police. Bark's attorney says he's on suicide watch. [UPI, Extra]
• Simon Cowell is dating Mezghan Hussainy, a make-up artist who works on American Idol. [The Daily Mail]
• Marilyn Manson wrote this threat to journalists on his blog: "I can, but do not need to defend myself And the absurd accusations that the average press has clinged onto. If we need a nude photo of me to prove that I am far different than the soon-to-be-murdered-in-their-home press has decided to fabricate, that is easy. But if one more 'journalist' makes a cavalier statement about me and my band, I will personally or with my fans help, greet them at their home and discover just how much they believe in their freedom of speech. I dare you all to write one more thing that you won't say to my face. Because I will make you say it. In that manner. That is a threat. Mm" [Perez Hilton]
• It seems Marilyn Manson's comments were a reaction to a recent L.A. Weekly interview that paints him as a paranoid cocaine addict and claims ex Evan Rachel Wood was nicknamed "Snowflake" because "when they played shows, she'd hold all the coke." [Rolling Stone]
• A few days before their split from Reggie Bush, Kim Kardashian said in an interview about their house hunting expedition, "I've always wanted to buy a big house myself and ... It is time for me to move. I wish my sisters could move in with me...I don't think I would ever live with someone unless I'm engaged. I'm really firm on that. I have done it before. I would tell all my friends, the best thing is to keep your independence. It feels really good to be able to buy a place by myself." Of course, People thinks this is "telling." [People]
• Hulk Hogan's divorce from Linda Bollea is nearing an end. This morning they agreed to a final settlement over their assets and Hulk told reporters, "I'm a free man." [TMZ]
• Supposedly just six months into their relationship Josh Duhamel and Fergie's relationship is on the rocks because he wants to start a family and she wants to pursue her career. "Publicly they're painting a picture of sheer bliss, but behind the scenes, cracks in their young marriage are beginning to show," says a source. [The National Enquirer]
• The Sun quoted Estelle, who sings "American Boy" as Tweeting "Rihanna just doesn't do it for me," but she says they were actually quoting one of her followers and she never insulted Rihanna. [The Daily Express]
• Ashley Jensen of Ugly Betty and her husband, actor Terence Beesley, are expecting their first child in the fall. [People]
• Ethan and Joel Coen's A Serious Man and Drew Barrymore's Whip It will premiere at the Toronto International Film Festival. [Variety]
• Warren Beatty's lawyer is arguing that it would be too expensive and inconvenient for him to travel to Delaware for the trial to settle a dispute about the movie and TV rights to Dick Tracy. [AP]
• A reporter on Good Day Scramento joked during an interview with Joan Rivers that her daughter Melissa Rivers was just riding her coattails. Joan replied: "I think we're going to end the interview right here. Don't be so fucking smart." [TMZ]
• Josh Brolin says sex with Megan Fox was "uncomfortable" ... on screen in their film Jonah Hex. [The Sun]
• Leonardo DiCaprio was spotted flirting with Ashley Roberts of the Pussycat Dolls. [The Sun]
• According to a press release from E!'s Daily 10, Kevin Federline says of his relationship with Britney Spears, "It's been really cordial, you know, thank God. We've had our rough patches, but you know, right now, we're doing great." And concerning the rumors that he'll star in a reality show about him getting back into shape, Kev says, "It would probably be pretty interesting, you know?"
• A reporter asked Nora Ephron if it's possible to achieve real happiness without butter. She replied: "I feel this way, but, you know, there are probably some people who have probably achieved happiness without it. But I feel sorry for them." [The L.A. Times]
• Dame Judi Dench was almost hit by a speeding taxi in London. The driver yelled, "You stupid cunt!" and she replied, " That's Dame Cunt to you!" [Perez Hilton]
• Diane Keaton has spearheaded a campaign to keep a developer from demolishing the Century Plaza Hotel, a curving glass and steel building made in the '60s that Keaton calls, "a sexy woman surrounded by ogling men – Sophia Loren in the 1960s". [The Independent]
• "Who's not Team Edward?" says Jennifer Love Hewitt of Twilight's Edward Cullen, "There is not a girl in the world who's not Team Edward! Have you met girls who are not Team Edward? Well, they are not girls! They're aliens from another planet who should not be allowed to exist... Listen, Edward can fly you through the forest. He's like Aladdin with vampire teeth - there's magic-carpet rides. He can sing. He can watch you sleep. He plays music. He sniffs your neck. I mean, please!" [MTV]

In a world of silk-garment photo-shoots and leaked camera-phone undie pics, it's nice to know that the majority of Disney's stable of young stars toe the line: indeed, a weird number. While it's natural that people who work together, are isolated from the rest of existence, and see each other every day should become incolved, the numbers still seem suspiciously high. There's Zac and Vanessa, of course; but also the dramatic Miley-Selena-Nick love triangle, and, until recently, Selena's BFF Demi Lovato (who's also been linked to Joe Jonas) and Miley's brother Trace. It's as incestuous as an isolated polygamists' cult - or a high school with no other students.

How do we know? Teen mags, select interviews, tabloids. None of this seemed quite so sinister before the Cyrus Affair and Disney's angry Big-Brother response, but now the mouse behind the curtain seems to loom in a way even youngsters can't ignore. As the Guardian relates, since their (very public) split, Demi and Trace have taken it to the Tweets:

"I know there's such thing as a Mr Right," tweets Demi. "But can there be such thing as a Mr Not Right Now . . . ?" Alas, it is not long before she is musing "Ur So Gay, Katy Perry – such a well written, relatable song. ;) HaHaHaHa."

"Another storybook ending," declares Trace sarcastically, before posting a picture of the girlfriend before Demi.

"I'm sorry, was that supposed to hurt?" responds Demi. "Hmm. Oh well."

Since it seems fairly sure that these kids do approximately nada without the mouse's say-so, one can only assume that, as opposed to these renegade photo shoots, this sort of thing is sanctioned: relatable, G-rated high school romance that can give the thousands of followers a vicarious heartbreak - just as they get a thrill when we just happen to learn that Nick Jonas has bought Miley a wholesome (but aspirationally large!) promise ring.

It's not to say these romances are fake (who could manufacture the pain of Disney-born "Cry Me a River?!") but doubtless...encouraged. One can only assume there are plenty of other relationships - and spats - we're not reading about. When one starts to make the jump to Old Hollywood and their publicity machines, though, you can't help but start to recall lurid stories - of gay stars set up in sham marriages, pregnancies disguised, narratives spun. I'm not saying that's happening today - I don't think it could happen today, not with Perez etc. on the loose - but if anyone could do it, it's Disney, the one place that still trucks in modern fantasy - and the accompanying old-fashioned cynicism.

Even Disney's Magic Can't Protect Its Teen Lovers From Heartbreak [Guardian]

• Lily Allen is suing The Sun over an article in which the British newspaper quoted her as calling Victoria Beckham a "monster" and insulting several other celebrities. Allen says she never made the comments. [The Guardian]

• Christine Prody is shopping a tell-all book about her 13-year relationship with O.J. Simpson called Spellbound: My Life With O.J. Simpson. She claims that he forced her to have two abortions, threatened to kill her, and compared her to his murdered ex-wife Nicole. [Newser]
• Michael Jackson has filed legal papers asking a judge to throw out a judgment against him. Jackson's former publicist Raymone Bain got a default judgment in her lawsuit against Jackson for allegedly failing to pay her because he never responded to the suit. MJ says he was never served with the papers. Bain counters that she tried to serve him, but a security guard at his home told the process server "Get the fuck out of here!" [TMZ]
• A Massachusetts teacher saved Tom Brady's life after he fell into Boston's Charles River while kayaking with Gisele Bundchen. Robin Leeds was on the river in a motorboat when she saw that Brady was in the water. "I actually asked him why he fell in. He said he was racing one of his friends," said Leeds, who found Brady "really friendly, really appreciative that we fished him out of the Charles." [People]
• Sources claim Gisele Bunchen is pregnant, and that she's "ecstatic." The source adds, "Gisele will be an excellent mother." [People]
• Jennifer Aniston had dinner last night with Bradley Cooper, her He's Just Not That Into You costar. Cooper says they're not dating, but TMZ has decided that they are. [TMZ]
• An anonymous source insists, "It was a date. She is taking it slow. She is obviously looking for love, but is not about to rush into anything." [People]
• TLC has released a new clip from Monday's episode of Jon and Kate Plus 8, which makes it pretty clear that they'll announce they are divorcing. Kate Gosselin says, "We haven't really known where we were going but we've been dealing with this a long time." In a separate interview, Jon Gosselin says, "It just got worse and worse and worse. And with all the tabloids and all that, it just made it even worse." [People]
• Jon Gosselin was hunting for an apartment in New York City and checked out Trump Place. "[Jon] has been going back and forth to New York a lot" says a source. [People]
• A source says that Katie Lee Joel, 27, is divorcing Billy Joel, 60, because of their age difference. "It really was just an age thing," said a friend. "She loves the city, she loves to go out and have fun and he prefers to stay at home. The age difference didn't seem to be a big deal seven years ago [when they met], but it has become one as they got older... They just grew apart." [N.Y. Post]
• California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger sent Senate President Pro Tem Darrel Steinberg a metal sculpture of bull testicles as a joke after saying that lawmakers needed to make bold decisions during budget negotiations. Steinberg returned the sculpture with a note about the seriousness of the negotiations. [MSNBC]
• At the Tribeca Barnes & Noble last night, a staffer said 1,000 people showed up for Lauren Conrad's book signing. She did not actually read from L.A. Candy and would only sign her name, not a personalized message. [N.Y. Magazine]
• T.R. Knight released a statement confirming that he's leaving Grey's Anatomy. He said, "Leaving Grey's Anatomy was not an easy decision for me to make. I am extremely grateful to have had the opportunity to play this character and will miss my fellow cast and crew very much. I continue to wish them the very best, and wholeheartedly thank all of the fans who have supported me and the show with such passion and enthusiasm." [Entertainment Weekly]
• Camilla Belle says even though they were seen out on what the tabloids called a date, she and Robert Pattinson are just friends. "We have a big group of friends and we saw each other last night," she said.. "[Pattinson] is very cool – a very nice guy." [People]
• Stephen Baldwin has quit I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! for unknown reasons. [Perez Hilton]
• A federal judge has set July 15 as the deadline by which Morgan Freeman and the woman suing him for the car crash they were in must submit settlement proposals. [Yahoo]
• Susan Boyle has skipped two performances of the Britain's Got Talent tour this week. Her publicist said, "She would love to be able to perform every single evening but she is aware of what she can and can't do. I feel sorry for her because she doesn't want to let people down but also she needs to have a rest." He stressed that the reason she cancelled was not because she missed her cat Pebbles, as the tabloids reported. [E!]
• Susan Boyle pulled out of another show today and reportedly had a screaming fit and needed to be calmed down by the show's organizers. [The Daily Mail]
• Joe Jonas announced that Nick Jonas and Miley Cyrus are back together on Larry King Live last night. When Larry asked if Joe's girlfriend is as famous as Nick's, Joe said, "I don't think anybody is as famous as Miley Cyrus." Nick seems a little upset and says, "It's nice to have reconnected with her. For a little while there, we had not been as reconnected as we are now." [People]
• Kelly Rutherford and her estranged husband Daniel Giersch have agreed that he will give her lawyer his visa and visa application within the next week. It seems she is worried that he may try to leave the country with their two children, Hermes and Helena. [TMZ]
• Oprah Winfrey is taking her entire staff and their families on a Mediterranean cruise. The cruise ship will stop in Spain, Italy, Turkey, Greece and Malta and Oprah is paying for their transportation, food, drinks and activities at port stops. [The Chicago Sun-Times]
• After watching the girls at the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy in South Africa put on a show for the school's annual arts festival, Oprah said she was overwhelmed by the girls' talent and that they are "living the vision" she had for them. [USA Today]
• Usher shot a new ad for the Body By Milk campaign and said he now feels he's arrived. He said in order to be a Hollywood icon, "You've got to do things like win Oscars and Grammys, but you're nothing if you don't have a milk ad!" [People]
• The Rachel Zoe Project returns to Bravo on August 25. [The L.A. Times]
• Louisiana movie investor Jay Dykes Jr. has agreed to dismiss Madonna from a lawsuit that accuses the film production company she founded, Maverick Films, of failing to repay investor's loans. [AP]
• Julianne Hough will star opposite Chace Crawford in the remake of Footloose. [Variety]
• Heather Locklear's publicist says Heather and Jack Wagner are not engaged. [UPI]
• Michael Bay says if there is another Transformers movie he won't direct it, because he's sick of getting bad reviews. "I need to do something totally divergent, something without any explosions," he said. "It's easy to go shoot an art movie in a winery in the South of France. But people have no idea how hard it is to create something like Transformers. They (the critics) review me before they've even seen the movie." [IMDB]
• Paul McCartney's book about the adventures of a squirrel, High in the Clouds will be made into an animated film. McCartney will write new music for the film. [The Star]
• PETA sent a letter to Phish asking the band to change their name to "Sea Kittens" for a June concert in Wisconsin. "If Phish became Sea Kittens and the band's legions of fans started calling fish 'sea kittens,' fewer of these gentle animals would be violently killed for food, painfully hooked for 'sport,' or cruelly confined to aquariums," says Ashley Byrne, PETA's Sea Kittens campaign coordinator. "Whether they are catfish or cats, bass or basset hounds, all animals deserve lives free from needless pain." [PETA.org]
• Peter Andre broke down and cried as he greeted his mother at the airport in Cyprus. Meanwhile his estranged wife Katie Price was seen out at a nightclub with Anthony Lowther for the third night in a row. [The Daily Mail]
• NYU alum Todd Phillips did a Q&A a the school and showed his film The Hangover but the University was annoyed by a story he told about claiming university equipment was stolen and ripping off an insurance company. The school has issued a statement saying, "we were appalled by a story in which he made light of committing insurance fraud as a student. Whether or not this story is true, we assure you we never have, and never will, condone behavior that does not respect people, property, and legal documents." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Holly Madison was turned away from Body English at Las Vegas' Hard Rock Hotel & Casino because she showed up with a group of Playmates and one of the women wasn't 21. [People]
• Though Megan Fox says she is "what you would call single," she was spotted having dinner with ex-fiance Brian Austin Green. [The Sun]
• So You Think You Can Dance judge Mary Murphy said she doesn't know if the rumors that Katie Holmes will appear ont he show are true or not, but "If it is true, I'm going to be one of the happiest campers around, let me tell ya! I just wish I knew!" [People]
• New York Jets safety Kerry Rhodes plays a police officer in Lady Gaga's video for "Paparazzi." "The shoot was ridiculous!" he says. "Everywhere you turned there was a dead body – not real! – a really big horse-looking dog, and a half-naked model, which was cool." [People]
• While performing his song "Only Women Bleed" onstage, Alice Cooper pretends to beat his 27-year-old daughter, Calico. "Obviously people have talked [about it being weird] that 'she's prancing around half naked on the stage,'" Calico said. "I'm like 'there's a point to that, it's like Shakespeare, it's painting a picture of stuff that's reality in a lot of people's lives." She added that she's looked into the audience and seen, "everybody from little housewives down there crying their eyes out, to big biker guys wiping big tears away. [Domestic abuse is] a heavy subject and I think it takes a brave guy to not just write about it, but write a scene and write a sketch that's uncomfortable." [CBS News]
• Bethenny Frankel of The Real Housewives of New York wrote a lengthy blog post once again about The Real Housewives of New Jersey. She wrote: "And lastly, as for Dina blogging that TV isn't just for money and that I should apologize by donating "some of that Skinnygirl money" to her charity, here is my response: Dina, I happily donate my time and money to the Children's Tumor Foundation, Camp Confidence and the Step Up Women's Network, just to name a few. Dina, for you to insinuate that you did this reality show for charity, I will quote my friend Kathy Griffin and say, "That's a bag of bulls—t." [E!]
• Evan Rachel Wood says she's going to be on True Blood as a lesbian vampire. She said, "I actually put in a phone call to [series creator] Alan Ball and said, 'I love the show, I'm obsessed with it, seen every episode; if there's ever a part, keep me in mind.' It looks like I'm going to be in the last two episodes as the Vampire Queen of Louisiana. I've been watching The Lost Boys and my favorite vampire movies. It's a lot harder than I imagined. I'm working pretty hard on the script. But I don't think I'll really be able to find the character until I'm in wardrobe and I'm in fangs." She said she'll be in a sex scene, "But it's with a girl. That's all I'm going to say... I don't think vampires are really gay or straight. I think she just prefers women." [Newsweek]

When the story hit USWeekly's site, the commenters came out in force to announce their hatred for Miley and to warn Nick to run from her "slutty" ways:

2:47 PM Anonymous Says:
She is pathetic- way to dump one & move on to the next. Justin is much better off without a tramp like you.
Please remind me why girls look up to her. She is UGLY and ANNOYING!

10:33 PM Old School Woman Says:
I have to agree with some of the posts here. She is another DISNEY talent that shows she is nothing but a S*UT! I fault her parents. What parent in their right mind allows a 15 year old CHILD to date a 20 year old MAN! She didn't dump him, he dumped her. She was no longer of any value to his GOALS as a celebrity. Also, they probably had NOTHING in common being that he is 20 and when they first dated she was 15! Does the word PEDOPHILE come to mind. She is no longer of any use to him. He got his 15 minutes of fame and will receive more because now the media will follow him around to get his take on the breakup. He will spew all about their personal relationship to the tabloids to make his money. What idiots the parents where to condone this relationship. He will probably talk about their personal lives too! Now Miley wants to go back to protecting her image by being with the cellibate Jonas brother! Give me a break. Miley you got USED! Deal with it!

I suspect that several of these "anonymous" commenters were fans of the Jonas Brothers who didn't want to see their imaginary boyfriend hook up with Hannah Montana. But sadly, I also think there were several adults on the site who, for some reason or another, seem to think that a 16-year-old who—gasp—dares to split from her boyfriend and "reconnect" with another boy is a total slutbag who should be shunned, Hester Prynne-style, for even daring to associate herself with more than one man before someone puts a ring on her finger.

There has always been an obsession with youth in this country; the weird fascination with teen starlets is really nothing new. And it can easily be argued that the public's obsession with Miley's sex life (as well as the sex lives of the Jonas Brothers) can be traced to the Disney "purity ring" marketing machine, which pushes sexualized images of children while attempting to rectify the situation by insisting that none of their stars are sexually active whatsoever. It's totally okay to sell sex, you see, as long as you aren't having it.

The vitriol spewed at Miley Cyrus is all too familiar: Britney Spears' career began flailing soon after her breakup with Justin Timberlake, and even now, years later, whenever Britney hits a rough patch, people seem to expect Justin to come to the rescue. It's a very peculiar setup: we, as a society, expect famous teenagers to remain teenagers forever, and we expect their relationships to stand the test of time, which is a pretty unfair burden to put on kids, as I'm pretty sure none of us would want to be stopped on the street and asked embarrassing questions about our boyfriend or girlfriend from 9th grade.

I have admitted in the past that I hate the Disney machine and what it does to young girls, and though I often find myself annoyed by Miley Cyrus (and most of that annoyance is aimed at the machine behind her, including Disney and her parents) I think this particular incident, especially the vitriol being thrown at Miley, for daring to date around and—gasp—perhaps even have sex, compared to the "protective" comments being geared toward Nick, just shows how these young women are being set up to fall, hard, just for going through the normal transition from being a teenager to being an adult. At least one commenter had Miley's back:

8:03 PM Becky Says:

I cannot believe some of you people! How can you call a girl you have never even met, and who, as far as I know, has never had a sexcapade flaunted over the rag mags, a slut? She seems like a fairly well-adjusted teenager to me. What exactly makes her a slut? Her dating an older man? My husband is four years older than me, yet no one blinks an eye at that. Or is it that she has a nose ring? Oh no! Self-expression!!! Bless my buttons and call the exorcist! Or maybe her dating an ex again makes her slutty...have none of you gone from one boy to the next quite quickly when you were teenagers? You people are pathetic.

Amen, Becky. Bless my buttons and call the exorcist, indeed.

Miley Cyrus: Nick Jonas And I Have "Reconnected" [USWeekly]
Earlier: That's Enough, Disney Girls

• A rep for Chastity Bono—the child of Sonny and Cher—confirms that Bono is in the initial stages of transitioning from female to male.

"Yes, it's true — Chaz, after many years of consideration, has made the courageous decision to honor his true identity. It is Chaz's hope that his choice to transition will open the hearts and minds of the public regarding this issue, just as his 'coming out' did nearly 20 years ago. We ask that the media respect Chaz's privacy during this long process as he will not be doing any interviews at this time." [TMZ]

• But that won't stop TMZ from hypothesizing about what Bono is going through right now. [TMZ]
• Real Housewives of New Jersey's Jacqueline Laurita gave birth to an 8 lbs., 8 oz. baby boy named Nicholas Thursday morning. No word on whether or not he's read Cop Without a Badge yet. [Us]
• An independent autopsy of David Carradine's body, requested by his family, concluded that the actor did not commit suicide. [Breitbart]
• Dr. Michael Baden, the guy from all those HBO autopsy shows, is the one who performed the examination. [TMZ]
• Nicolas Cage felt it was important enough to released an official statement alerting people that he did not hire a Voodoo Priestess to break a hex on the set The Sorcerer's Apprentice. Cage said, "I don't know why tabloids don't call up and ask before they print this gobbly gook." Maybe because you use words that sound like the name of a candy Hogwarts students could purchase in Diagon Alley, thus confirming an interest in dark arts? [NY Mag]
• Miley Cyrus is "devastated" over her breakup with model Justin Gaston, as her Tweets—"Tears are words the heart can't express"—would indicate. [Daily Express]
• But not that devastated. Miley and Nick Jonas are back on, as evidenced by blurry photos of them jet skiing together in Georgia. That's the most fun she'll ever have between her legs as long as she's with that guy. [Perez Hilton]
• Paris Hilton got over her breakup with Doug Reinhardt—real fast—with the help of a hookup with Cristiano Ronaldo. [TMZ]
• Does Rihanna have a new boyfriend? She's been seen hanging out with Canadian rapper Aubrey "Drake" Graham a bunch for the past month. I thought "Aubrey" was a girl group girl's name.[People]
• Before she was fired from her position as Miss California USA, Carrie Prejean was offered a spot on I'm a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here! The producers of the show promised her $70,000 if she stayed for one week and $140,000 if she stayed for all three weeks. A pageant exec turned the offer down for her. [TMZ]
• Kyle MacLachlan is considering leaving Desperate Housewives to be a stay-at-home-dad. [Daily Express]
• John Cleese is recovering from eye surgery, and uplifted by well-wishers. [Daily Express]
• Television actor Johnny Palermo—once a regular on the Nickelodeon series Just for Kicks—was killed this week, along with his girlfriend, in a car accident in L.A. He was 27. [UPI]
• Martha Stewart's lynx Himalayan cat Mozart passed away. He was 19. [TMZ]
• My Name Is Earl is finally dead. A statement issued by producers said they "could not make the economics work without seriously undermining the artistic integrity of the series." [NY Mag]
• Yoko Ono was given a lifetime achievement award at the Mojo magazine awards in London, for changing "music as we know it in her own right." [BBC]
• A bunch of Austrian's are already pissed off about Bruno, in which Sacha Baron Cohen plays a gay fashion journalist who wants to be "the most famous Austrian since Hitler," saying it poses a threat to Austria's world image. Their lack of a sense of humor seems a lot more damaging. [Telegraph]
• While watching He's Just Not That Into You at home alone last night, Lily Allen had a Bridget Jones moment when she Tweeted, "I think I may be alone forever. Sad." [The Sun]
• Smug-marrieds Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz were recently photographed for NOH8, a campaign supporting efforts to overturn Proposition 8. [E!]
• A ruling from Malawi's highest court—on whether or not Madonna is allowed to adopt a 3-year-old Malawian girl—is expected Friday. [Yahoo]
• Perhaps because he knows the world wouldn't feel right if he went an entire week without being arrested, Pete Doherty was arrested last night. This time the charges were for drunk driving, driving without a license, and drug possession. [The Sun]
• Defending his seemingly drunk, early-morning live television interview yesterday, Danny DeVito said, "I was only trying to make a TV interview fun." [Radar]
• Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston did not have a secret hotel rendezvous, as reported on the cover of Star. Doye. [Us]
• Woody Allen ducked out of his own party for his latest film Whatever Works after only a few minutes. [Daily Beast]
• Kanye West admits that there is one person in the world who dresses better than he does: Lady Gaga. [NY Mag]
• Ticket sales for Les Miserables in London's West End have gone up 46% since Susan Boyle's star-making performance of "I Dreamed A Dream" during the first round of Britain's Got Talent. [Telegraph]
• A New Jersey woman— Jamie Czerniawski—who was once featured on the show Wife Swap stabbed her husband with a kitchen knife. She says it was in self-defense. Czerniawski is currently out on $75,000 bail. [AP]
• Kim Gordon and Thurston Moore of Sonic Youth are big Gossip Girl fans, and they like that the kids on the show get good grades. [NY Mag]
• Kevin Smith is taking his stand-up/Q&A show to Carnegie Hall. Silent Bob Speaks: An Evening With Kevin Smith is on June 17. [Newsweek]
• "I have to either have a baby or get engaged. I can't just be happy and have a great boyfriend and travel the world. Those things are not fantastic enough for people." - Jennifer Love Hewitt discussing how the tabloids view her relationship with boyfriend Jamie Kennedy. [E!]
• "I think women are afraid to say that they don't want children because they're going to get shunned. But I think that's changing too now. I have more girlfriends who don't have kids than those that do. And honestly? We don't need any more kids. We have plenty of people on this planet." - Cameron Diaz. [ONTD]

• Miley Cyrus and Justin Gaston have split after less than a year together. A source says the breakup was a result of Miley's traveling, and not Nick Jonas, although he and Miley "have been spending time together." [Us]

• Adam Lambert's debut album is set to drop in the fall. He says, "It's going to be ridiculous! Get Ready!!!" [People]
• And Lambert's "official coming out cover of Rolling Stone" apparently includes a disturbingly-placed snake. [Perez Hilton]
• Megan Fox is in favor of legalizing marijuana. If it ever happened, she says, she'd be the "first person in line to buy a pack of joints." [TMZ]
• In what is perhaps the most superficial news item ever, Heidi Montag Pratt is starting a dry shampoo line inspired by her hair care experiences on I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here!. [Life & Style]
• Also, Heidi and Spencer have left the show for real this time. Hollywood publicist Michael Levine says, "the audience is also ridiculous for partnering in their absurdity." Well, yeah. [ABC]
• Adam Ant credits his comeback from "his deranged and bloated appearance" seven years ago to regular exercise and his girlfriend Clare, who makes sure he eats "only the finest healthy food." [Daily Mail]
• DJ Jazzy Jeff "stormed off the stage" at Kansas City venue Power & Light District, and later said managers stopped the show "for playin' hip hop." The managers say they just wanted him to turn the music down. [Breitbart]
• Okay, so maybe Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore didn't invite Susan Boyle to sing at their anniversary. [Telegraph]
• On September 9, Natalie Cole will give her first concert after her kidney transplant and her sister's death. [AP, via Yahoo News]
• David Carradine's ex-wife says he once suspended himself from a rope in a crucifixion position while she was giving a party. When she asked him what he was doing, he said, "I really would like a sandwich." [TMZ]
• The Thai police say the FBI can get involved in investigating Carradine's death, but only in an "observer role." [TMZ]
• And photos of Carradine's body show that the rope around his neck was knotted in the front, making it more likely his death was an accident. Apparently people who practice bondage frequently knot ropes in the front for easier release. [TMZ]
• Thirty-four-year-old Enrique Iglesias says he's not yet "mature" enough to father Anna Kournikova's children. [TMZ]
• A new play about Kurt Cobain is running in London, but will it be as good as Christopher Walken's play about Elvis? [Independent]
• Bret Michaels broke his nose and split his lip when he was hit by a falling sign at the Tony Awards, but he was apparently really nice about it. [People]
• Emeril Lagasse helped Jon and Kate Gosselin prepare a meal for their 100th episode. The menu included green bean casserole, chili macaroni, and, oddly, granola. [People]
• A Toni Braxton impersonator accused of telling a Suriname audience she was the real Toni Braxton has been acquitted. WTF. [AP, via Yahoo News]
• Mike Tyson has married his girlfriend after the death of their daughter Exodus. [Radar Online]
• Shanna Moakler surprisingly took the high road in response to Travis Barker's defamatory tweets. She had her reps tell OK!, "Shanna is not going to play out her personal relationships in the media." Her relationship to Carrie Prejean's breasts is another story.[Perez Hilton]
• Depeche Mode has resumed its tour after singer Dave Gahan's cancer surgery. [NYT]
• In potentially disturbing news for St. Lucia's youth, Amy Winehouse has pledged to help them. [Mirror]
• OK! is taking Emma Watson's statement that "there's something going on" between Robert Pattinson and Kristin Stewart as proof that they are together. [OK!]
• But Watson's publicist says the statement is made up! [Perez Hilton]
• Some sources say Leonardo Dicaprio and Bar Rafaeli have broken up. [People]
• Others say they are still together, but "miserable-looking." [TMZ]
• Paris Hilton loves Doug Reinhardt, but not Kim Kardashian — according to Doug Reinhardt. [E! Online]
• Anika Noni Rose says Jennifer Hudson will be a great mom. "It's been a harrowing year for her and I hope that she finds comfort, joy and support and that she can move forward with her new baby," Rose adds. [People]
• Prince reportedly needs two hip replacements, but refuses because, as a Jehovah's Witness, he can't get a blood transfusion. [Showbiz411.com]
• A tabloid reporter slyly questions whether Brooke Shields's mom really has dementia, then says he and Teri Shields were great friends and that "most of our wonderful afternoons together never resulted in a story." What a saint. [National Enquirer]
• Terrence Howard says the Obamas should go to Prague on one of their date nights, because it is "an untapped resource of love and romance," while Paris is "overused." Russell Simmons thinks they should go to a yoga studio. [Politico]
• "I went to see Andrea Bocelli last night. The first time I've been out in months. The Hollywood Bowl allowed me to use my wheelchair." — Elizabeth Taylor, via Twitter [CNN]
• "I think I'm either naive or insane to play her - maybe a little bit of both!" — Anne Hathaway, on playing Judy Garland in an upcoming biopic [Daily Express]
• "I have a body that girls can look at and go, Oh she's not anorexically skinny. She looks healthy and she's got cellulite, yeah!" — Hayden Panettiere [E! Online]
• "(These shows) are a reflection of our society. You hear kids saying that they want to be famous, and when you ask them what for, they don't know - they just want to be famous. It's like there is this lack of passion in the doing of something that that might bring you riches. When I was little, I never said I wanted to be famous, I said I wanted to be a musician." — Lenny Kravitz, on reality shows [Daily Express]
• "He violated me. I never told anybody. I just buried it as deeply as I could and kept people at an arms length. I never really let a person get too close to me. I could have been married years ago, but I had a commitment issue." — Queen Latifah, speaking out for the first time about her childhood sexual abuse [The Sun]
• "Just know that this too shall pass.… Next week, it will be someone else on the cover [of magazines] and you can go about your life." — the sage Tori Spelling, advising Jon and Kate Gosselin on their notoriety [LA Times]

• Tyra Banks will be in court this week; she's expected to testify in the trial of her alleged stalker, Brady Green.

How weird will it be to be face-to-face with the guy? Oh, and get this: Green's lawyer's argument is that Tyra is to blame. "She invites fans that are inspired by her show to reach out to her," defense lawyer Sydney O'Hagen said in opening arguments at Green's trial. "Mr. Green was a fan, albeit perhaps an overzealous fan." Green allegedly sent flowers and love letters to Tyra, and then when an employee of her talk show refused to give him the address of the studio over the phone, Green said: "You're fucking lying, I'm going to find you and slit your throat." [NY Daily News, NY Post, AP]

• Casey Aldridge, the father of Jamie Lynn Spears' baby, was injured in a car accident yesterday; he was taken to the hospital with non-life threatening injuries. [Breitbart]
• This report claims that Casey Aldridge has a "cracked skull." [NY Post]
• Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt's wedding had a "spring feeling," meaning the colors were green and yellow and people drank margaritas while eating appetizers like tuna tartare and chicken salad. No one noticed the glowering specter in the corner, the one named "In The Grand Scheme These People Are Irrelevant." [People]
• Miss California, Carrie Prejean, received a "hero's welcome" when appearing at a San Diego megachurch. "'You need to apologize to the gay community. You need to not talk about your faith. This has everything to do with you representing California and saving the brand,'" Prejean recalled being told. "I was representing California. I was representing the majority of people in California." She also said: "I learned that God has a bigger crown than any man can give you." [AP]
• Clearcast, a TV company in the UK, wants to cut scenes from Keira Knightley's domestic violence ad before it is broadcast; specifically, the scenes where the actress is being thrown to the ground and kicked — the organization believes it is too violent. [Telegraph]
• The Sanskrit tattoo on Rihanna's hip is misspelled, but the tattoo artist says she wouldn't care: "It's copied off of a necklace that she got from somebody important to her," he explains. [UPI]
• Actress Vanessa A. Williams — not to be confused with Ugly Betty's Vanessa L. Williams — is using Rihanna's name on an invitation to a violence-prevention event. Rihanna is not involved with the organization, but the copy reads: "On February 8th, when famed singer Rihanna was allegedly beaten by her boyfriend, she was not alone." [Page Six]
• Susan Boyle auditioned for a TV show 14 years ago, and was rejected. [Daily Mail]
• Guy Ritchie has purchased a house 200 yards from Madonna's London mansion, putting him "as close as possible" to the kids. In addition, a source says Guy laughed when he found out that her Madgesty's new man, Jesus Luz, speaks very little English, saying: "Blimey, no wonder the whole thing works so perfectly." [The Sun]
• Is Jesus Luz only getting modeling jobs because of his relationship with Madonna? [Page Six]
• This paper claims Amy Winehouse is being called the "Pied Piper Of St. Lucia," since she loves hanging out with kids. But you get the feeling that the only person calling her that is whomever wrote this story. [The Sun]
• Henry Ian Cusick, aka Desmond on Lost, is being sued by a former ABC Entertainment employee for sexual harassment. He's been married for 3 years after being with his wife for 14 years and the couple has 3 sons. [Daily Mail]
• Apparently two high school guys saw Kate Winslet in her workout gear and commented on her "big hot booty." [Page Six]
• "Every Friday that he's shooting a movie, Hugh Jackman comes to work with a bag full of lottery tickets. He gives them to everyone who works on his movies: co-stars, camera crews, set hands, the people who cater the food. He doesn't play." [USA Today]
• Miley Cyrus says that she and Nick Jonas are just friends and not back together — if you heard that he is her boyfriend it is just a "stupidddd rumor." She Twittered: "It makes me sad to think that people out there aren't friends with THEIR ex bf, because let me tell u it IS possible." [People]
• Jennifer Hudson performed a concert in her hometown of Chicago — her first since her mother, brother and nephew were killed there. She didn't talk about the murders but did dedicate "You Pulled Me Though" to family members in the audience. [UPI]
• Will you look at the way Tina is looking at Beyoncé? It is soooo "tired mom." [Concrete Loop]
• Speaking of Beyoncé, guess who has another hit flick? Obsessed was number one at the box office with $28 million. [MSNBC Scoop, NY Daily News]
• Surely this will come as shocking, shocking news: The ladies of The Real Housewives Of New Jersey have ties to the mob. [NY Daily News]
• If you're a dedicated fan, get your credit card ready: Various props from the newest George Clooney flick, Up In The Air, are going up for sale. [UPI]
• Kobe Bryant demanded creative control over the documentary Spike Lee filmed of the basketball star, and an insider claims "Spike completely yielded." [Page Six]
• Jon Hamm and ladyfriend Jennifer Westfeldt have formed a production company named Points West Pictures. They have 3 projects in development and all will feature at least one of the couple. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Jamie Foxx has recorded a message for Nineline, a crisis helpline run by Convenant House, the agency which works with homeless kids. Says a spokesperson: "Now kids in crisis will not only hear a reassuring voice but a well-known, positive role model." [Hollywood Reporter]
• If you're interested in reading an essay about Mike Tyson written by Ice-T, click here. [The Daily Beast]
• There's tension and "cattiness" in the Pussycat Dolls; in a recent concert, Melody said: "Thank you so much for supporting me - even if I'm not featured, you know what I'm saying?" [NY Daily News]
• Katy Perry and Travis McCoy of Gym Class Heroes: Back on. [Gatecrasher]
• Kate Walsh's divorce is getting nasty — there's a quibble over the accounting firm Walsh is using, which her estranged husband Alex Young says is doing PR for Walsh. [TMZ]
• Daniel Radcliffe is the "12th richest young person in the UK." He's got more cash than Princes William and Harry! [Telegraph]
• If you have $27,9995,000, you can buy the Holmby Hills house of Kimberly and Hugh Hefner. [LA Times]
• Yes, yes, James Franco's student films are inspired by gay poetry. [NY Mag]
• Ugly Betty returns this week, ending the rumor that the show was cancelled. [NY Daily News]
• Liam Neeson and his sons are "keeping busy with normal life" — like going to Knicks games. [People, Mirror]
• In this article, Dominic Monaghan spills on all of his travel memories. He says: "I do remember a fantastic holiday to Thailand with Billy Boyd and Orlando Bloom in my early twenties. We were all single, young and up for an adventure. We went to Bangkok then took off to the islands." [Independent]
• Curious what's up with Michael Keaton? He's directed a film, The Merry Gentlemen. And he's broken his foot. [LA Times]
• In a lengthy interview, Natasha McElhone talks about dealing with grief since the death of her husband one year ago. [Guardian]
• Rolling Stone Ronnie Wood, 61, plans to marry his girlfriend Ekaterina, 20, just as soon as he can get a "speedy" divorce from his wife, Jo, 54. [Mirror]
• Actor Campbell Scott got engaged in November, but we're just hearing about it now? Eh, congrats. [People]
• "Kylie Minogue and Richard Branson lose money but make UK rich list." [News.com.au]
• Aerosmith will perform on Maui to settle a class-action lawsuit resulting from a concert cancellation in 2007. [AP]
• "He was renowned for wearing grandpa-style spectacles but it now emerges that John Lennon's iconic look came about by accident…" [Daily Express]
• Blind item! "Which alcoholic songbird wears her sunglasses even inside her hair salon so no one can see how sauced she is?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I love her. It's great for her. It's what she wanted." — Josh Lucas on ex-girlfriend Salma Hayek getting married in Venice on Saturday. [People]
• "Tax got to 82% [in the 1970s] and I thought this was kind of unfair. Also, I see... that the government has taken it up to 50% and if it goes to 51 I will be back in America. I will not pay the Government more than I get. No way, ever. So they've reached their limit with me. That's the lot." — Michael Caine. [Telegraph]
• "I did read a scene for the Coen brothers last year, which they were amazed I would do. I was amazed they were amazed because apparently there's a whole etiquette I'm not aware of that says if you've been in a couple of films, you don't read. Which I find very strange, because how are the filmmakers supposed to know whether you can do it or not? I was very happy to read." — Tilda Swinton, when asked if she has ever auditioned for a role. [Backstage]
• "Life's a pain in the butt. You've got to be in shape for it. And the hell with the good old days. The most important thing is now. What are you this moment?" — Jack LaLanne, who still works out every day for two hours, lifting weights and swimming, at age 94. [Reuters]
• "I knew it was a joke. I knew it was supposed to be silly. Something like that I don't even take seriously. I thought it was hilarious." — Beyoncé, on the "screeching" clip made by prankster Matthew Zeghibe. [Gatecrasher]
• "I was raised in the country. When it was warm outside we were out there in shorts, no shirt, no shoes. I was doing that long before anybody was taking pictures and people like you were seeing it." — Matthew McConaughey. [Newsweek]
• "I know I've never done any independent film before…but there aren't that many other scripts out there with great parts for women my age. It's a true phenomenon that the parts dwindle as you get older. You wake up one day and you're flabbergasted to find out…so, this has happened to me. When I started out," she continues, "It was right around the time when Meryl Streep and Jessica Lange and Sally Field-all these actresses getting older-were still having big movies every year. There was a Sophie's Choice, a Norma Rae, etc. I thought, this is a new era, and I won't have to worry. It will all be fixed by the time I'm 40! And of course, it wasn't. All of us female actors think we can just keep going and going. But it's not always the case." — Geena Davis. [The Daily Beast]
• "We know so much about every actor on planet Earth. We know how they like to slice their avocado, what they named their baby. When I'm watching them save the world in a movie, I don't want to be thinking about their baby's name. I will now go on record to say I'm not going to even name my kid." — Ryan Reynolds. [NY Mag]

• El oh el: It appears none of the celebrity weeklies have bought exclusive rights to pictures of Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt's wedding this weekend.

A source says they're not worried, because chances are, the pix will end up in all the mags: "They'd rather be on page 50 of Us, People, In Touch or Life & Style than be on the cover of a magazine like OK! that isn't going to sell. They need to make money, and so does the magazine. The formula is changing," spills a source. [MSNBC Scoop]

• In this video of concert footage, Britney's extensions get ripped out of her head and left behind on a couch. [Perez Hilton]
• Kudos to TMZ for the headline, "Britney Weaves It All On Stage." [TMZ]
• Lily Allen celebrated the end of her tour by having a "massive ice cream fight" in her dressing room. But she paid the clean-up bill: "Cost me $2,000. End of tour, time to get mashed." [The Sun]
• In case you forgot that Madonna's boyfriend Jesus Luz has a job, he totally walked the runway in a Jeffrey Fashion Cares fashion show. How do we feel about those white trousers? [WWD]
• Even though Miley Cyrus is with Justin Gaston, is she still hung up on her ex, Nick Jonas? Were they making out recently? Are they MFEO (made for each other)? [Gatecrasher]
• Jay Leno, who hasn't missed work in years, checked himself into a hospital with a "mystery illness." [NY Daily News]
• Paris Hilton's "BFF," Brittany Flickinger, was in a car crash in Hollywood last night; she wasn't wearing a seat belt and slammed her head into the windshield. Luckily, she escaped with only a chipped bone in her leg. [TMZ]
• Behold: Video of Justin Timberlake, in foxy glasses, talking about his mancrush on LeBron James: "He just lights me up!" He also declares Caddy Shack as the best sports movie ever. [Rolling Stone]
• Ashton Kutcher's Twitter can now be considered a place to break new artists; he wrote about an unsigned singer/songwriter named Alex Highton and now the guy's MySpace is blowing up. [Telegraph]
• Guess who stars in one of Kanye West's next videos? Rihanna. Yeezy says, "She's an amazing talent…Collaborating with her is always a pleasure!" [Fashion Week Daily]
• Amy Winehouse's dad flew to St. Lucia yesterday to check on the singer. Will they go horseback riding together? [The Sun]
• Beyoncé wants to do Broadway in a couple of years, when she's settled down and had some rugrats with Jay-Z: "It's my ideal job," she explains. "I'll be able to go to the theater every day and drop my kids off and maybe make some food — maybe I'll know how to cook by then — and then go do what I love and have some normalcy and have a regular schedule." [Reuters]
• Kim Kardashian on Miss California, Carrie Prejean: "I don't agree with her narrow mindedness and neither do a lot of people… Everyone has the right to be happy and be treated equally and I think not allowing gay marriage just kind of puts us back." But KK also says: "Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. She stood up for what she believes in so she should be happy with that backlash." [People]
• Is Pam Anderson down and out? Or is Courtney Love high? Wait. Don't answer that. Courtney says: "Pam Anderson doesn't even have a credit card. And she lives in Paradise Cove — which is in Malibu, but it's a trailer park in Malibu." [Page Six]
• This piece about Russell Crowe begins: "He is a man's man - or, rather, he is the kind of man in whom shabby, ageing, overweight, altogether untidy and unresolved males can see their manly image. In other words, Russell Crowe seems more than happy taking very little care of himself, his appearance or his 'glamour.'" Why don't you tell us how you really feel? [Guardian]
• Jerry Seinfeld's grandparents arrived in this country via Ellis Island, and their story will be in the spotlight on May 19, when the Statue of Liberty-Ellis Island Foundation bestows a "family heritage" award on Seinfeld. [NY Times]
• Parker Posey is no longer dating Keanu Reeves and has moved on to a graphic designer and sculptor named Scott Lenhardt. As seen in this picture, they're super happy and adorbs. [NY Mag]
• Aww, pictures of Slumdog Millionaire stars Dev Patel and Freida Pinto nuzzling up to each other over lunch in Israel — where Pinto is filming — will melt your cold, tiny heart. [Daily Mail]
• This report calls Kate Middleton Prince William's "bride in waiting," and notes that it's been discovered that she's related to Swallows And Amazons creator Arthur Ransome. [Daily Express]
• Blogger Julia Allison lives in the same apartment building as Rosie O'Donnell. Wednesday she posted a Twitter which read: "Holy shit. My neighbor Rosie O'Donnell has been having a knock down drag out screaming match with Kelli for the last hour. Sad. :( " Anywho, JA deleted the post, maybe because it's an invasion of privacy, but it's sorta too late. [Ed note: This will be the only mention of Ms. Allison on this blog for all of 2009.] [Gawker]
• Dane Cook was on Larry King Live, talking about his half-brother and former manager who embezzled millions from him: "It's a terrible betrayal. But hopefully justice will be served and I can move on with my life." [ET]
• Sniffle: Elton John, Paul McCartney and Mick Jagger have lost "huge chunks" of their personal fortunes due to the economic crisis. [Reuters]
• Stephen Dorff has joined the cast of the porn industry comedy Born To Be A Star, which is produced and co-written by Adam Sandler. [Variety]
• Blind item! "Which closeted - and married - actor almost had his cover blown when he hit on a straight man in a sauna? Word is the offended dude is now quite wealthy, thanks to a payoff." [Gatecrasher]
• "Although I'm her friend, [I don't want to defend her to her detractors] because that's their right as well. They feel really strongly about their opinion for pro-gay rights, and that's great." — Miss USA on Miss California. [Gatecrasher]
• "I realized I was spending hours and hours in the middle of the night signing autographs. Unless I had assistants forging letters and signatures I knew I couldn't continue. So I posted a message on the internet saying: 'If I can't do it honestly, I won't do it any more.'" — Viggo Mortensen, on answering fan mail. [Daily Mail]
• "He called me and said, 'You know let's do it right away.' It was really emotional. I think the only way he could have come back was right after because his family was all there to support his boys. Liam is heroic. He came back and finished. I think he's trying to absorb [what's happened] ... He's suddenly a single parent with absolutely no preparation for that. But he is surrounded by people that really love him. There is a lot of support." — Director Atom Egoyan, on Liam Neeson, who returned to the set of the film Chloe days after his wife Natasha Richardson died. [People]
• "We're just extremely careful with our shit. I keep a CD with me, I'm the only one who usually has a CD. Maybe me and Dre… Other than that, nobody has it." — Eminem, on how his new album avoided getting leaked. [Rolling Stone]
• "Watching it was horribly unhealthy for me. You think that would help keep me sober, you know seeing myself as this raving lunatic...It absolutely triggered these crazy urges to get loaded." — Steve-O on watching his upcoming documentary about his addiction and recovery. [E!]
• "For some reason people think like if you tell someone they're too thin that's OK. But if you tell someone they're too heavy that's insulting… It hurts either way. I'm the same weight I was before I was pregnant. I've been pregnant for two years in a row. I'm the same weight I was on 90210. I'm the same weight I was before I met Dean and we got married. It's the same." — Tori Spelling. [AP]
• "If you read some of his early-life autobiography, it's horrible... the amount of mental anguish he has to go through, just to have any kind of even vaguely sexual relationship. It's really depressing what he's going through in his head. Dali had a massive fear of penetration – penetrating someone or being penetrated… [As for the love scenes with a man,] I think girls almost really like watching something like that. From what I've read, people really get excited about that – it sounds really sexy!" — Robert Pattinson on playing Salvador Dali. [Independent]
• "Marijuana has always been that drug that united people. It's always been on the verge of being legal. It's hardly a drug really. When people look at marijuana, they look at it as an enjoyment of connecting." — Redman. [NY Daily News]
• "Most of the time, songs that I write end up being finished in 30 minutes or less. 'Love Story' I wrote on my bedroom floor in about 20 minutes. When I get on a roll with something, it's really hard for me to put it down unfinished. — From "10 Questions For Taylor Swift." [Time]
• "I don't even know what 'tweeting' means ... but it sounds dirty!" — Michelle Trachtenberg. [Gatecrasher]

• Shh! Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson went on some kind of super secret date in Paris. Don't tell!

As you may recall, Owen and Kate were an item in 2006; she broke up with him in 2007 and he allegedly attempted suicide shortly after. [The Sun]

• Is it possible to resign from the human race? Nadya "Octomom" Suleman was offered $1 million to make a porn flick. [TMZ]
• By the by, Nadya Suleman told Dr. Phil that the hospital may not release her kids unless she can prove she can care for them. [LA Times]
• Warren Beatty wants Lindsay Lohan to star in a film he's working on, and to live in his house. Here's to hoping she plays his daughter and not his love interest. [Fox 411]
• There's a warrant out for the arrest of Adnan Ghalib: He's charged with assault with a deadly weapon, battery, and hit and run. And awful facial hair. [TMZ]
• The LAPD is still "vigorously" investigating how that picture of Rihanna was leaked to TMZ. [E!]
• Chris Brown is reportedly taking anger management classes. [Gatecrasher]
• Alex Rodriguez just found an apartment on Manhattan's Central Park West, two blocks from Madonna's home. Be careful: Jesus is watching! [Page Six]
• This was bound to happen: Slumdog, the musical. Proceeds would help fund Mumbai's destitute kids. [Hindustan Times]
• It's cool that housing officials in Mumbai plan to give the Slumdog kids' families some free apartments, even if it is a publicity stunt, but you've got to imagine that the kids friends and cousins are like so, so jealous, no? [The Sun]
• If you were watching the Oscars in Asia, the words "gay" and "lesbian" were censored. Gay Asians are pissed! [AP]
• Guy Ritchie's Sherlock Holmes is going to be a gay ol' time: Apparently Holmes and Watson share a bed. Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law under the covers! [News Of The World]
• Finding Nemo vet Ellen DeGeneres will do another animated flick, Dog Show. Robert Downey Jr. and Tina Fey are the lead voice actors. The plot? A stray dog and her misfit friends "shake up the purebred world" of a Westminster-like dog show. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Will Iman pop up on Project Runway? [Page Six]
• Jay-Z and Khloe Kardashian had drinks and Jay left a $2000 tip. Klassy! [Page Six]
• Chow Yun Fat had eyelid surgery? He says: "As I grew older, my eyelids began to droop. I began going for cosmetic surgery in Hong Kong when I was filming The God Of Gamblers in 1989. If you go to Hong Kong for cosmetic surgery, I can introduce you to the doctor. He's cheap and good." Uh, thanks? [Straits Times]
• A TV commercial in China has David Beckham "talking" about an anti-impotence drug and saying, "It's the secret weapon with which I can satisfy Victoria." They're using celeb faces without permission. [Daily Mail]
• Eartha Kitt was nowhere to be found in the "In Memoriam" section of the Oscars. A fan contacted her rep, and her rep responded: "It was noticed and I'm handling it the best I can. Please continue to send your thoughts to ABC and SAG." [ONTD]
• Eartha Kitt's publicist tells Page Six: "It's clear that [Oscars producers] thought that publicist Warren Cowan was more of a household name." [Page Six]
• Robert Pattinson had better "watch out," because Taylor Lautner, the Twilight/New Moon werewolf Jacob Black, is a "hunk." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Evan Rachel Wood will play Juliet. In Romeo And Juliet. On the stage in Theatre In The Park in her hometown of Raleigh, North Carolina. Congrats? [Mirror]
• Pictures of Lily Allen dressed as a panda and a baby bird just make you like her more. [The Life Files]
• OMFG: Gossip Girl will return to the CW in the fall! So will One Tree Hill, 90210, Smallville, Supernatural and America's Next Top Model. Fate undecided: Privileged. [Reuters]
• Guests were "encouraged" to wear pink at Paris Hilton's second birthday party of the year. [Page Six]
• Jimmy Fallon on Late Night: "I have a realistic attitude about all this. People are going to see me who are awake at 12:30. College kids and prison guards." [The Daily Beast]
• Apparently Simon Cowell's comment about wanting to be frozen after death was a joke. [AP]
• Tiger Woods is talking about being lucky to get to stay home with his wife and kids while recovering from a knee injury and holy crap his daughter is adorbs. [People]
• In Amy Adams's next film, Sunshine Cleaning, she plays a single mom who cleans up crime scenes to make enough money to send her kid to private school. Oh, and she wears $100 jeans. [USA Today]
• Tommy Hilfiger's new wife is three months pregnant. (Tommy's daughter Ally is about to turn 24.) [Page Six]
• LOL: Keith Richards is telling people to sober up? [Page Six]
• Sandra Bullock stopped by Briarcrest Christian School in Memphis to research her role for The Blind Side, a film about a student who left his impoverished life and went to live with a wealthy couple, going on to become a successful football player. [UPI]
• By the by, Sandy Bullock sleeps with three dogs in her bed. [Page Six]
• The Killers are countersuing a former manager in Nevada federal court; both sides seek millions. [USA Today]
• Craig Bierko maybe dated Meg Ryan, Charlize Theron and Gretchen Mol. He definitely had something going on with Janeane Garofalo; he calls her "he" and she calls him "she." [Village Voice]
• If you want to read Mike Leigh's Oscar diary, it is here. [Guardian]
• The lead singer of the Bare Naked Ladies has resigned in a "mutual agreement." [ONTD]
• Blind item: "Which rock star has extra-special house parties? Guests check their clothes at the door, don a robe and indulge in huge bowls of every drug you can imagine." [Gatecrasher]
• "Like we've always said - someone that's good to our Mom, that's very important. And someone that has a good sense of humor." — Nick Jonas, on what kind of girl he and his brothers want. [Mirror]
• "She is pathetic now. Madonna used to be a symbol of rebellion in the '80s, someone who was against religious orthodoxy. Now we have this Madonna who is always preaching kabbalah, trying to teach people how to live their lives" — Camille Paglia in Brazil's Veja magazine. [Page Six]

Seen (as pictured) at the Charlotte Ronson show this afternoon (Charlotte is Sam Ronson's twin sister, by the by) LL said: "I'm really sick right now. I think I have an ear infection." Plus: "I'm not sure what I'm doing the rest of the week," she shrugged. You heard it here first: Apathy is so hot right now. [WWD]

• Oh and Lindsay Lohan, who you'll recall once worked with the likes of Jane Fonda and Meryl Streep, has been cast as the lead female role in the remake of A Nightmare On Elm Street. [Just Jared]
• Wait, no she wasn't! [Just Jared]
• This just in: Chris Brown had a "secret meeting" in LA on Thursday night with his mom and other family members and friends. Guess what: He and Rihanna have "officially broken up." And Chris thinks he will not, repeat, NOT go to jail. He told those gathered: "Protect me. I'm your homeboy." [Radar]
• Patrick Swayze, who just got over pneumonia and is still battling cancer, continues to smoke. Ugh! [The Sun]
• In a completely natural follow up to Twilight, Robert Pattinson's next role will be Spanish surrealist painter Salvador Dalí in Little Ashes. [People]
• Jerry O'Connell tried out a breast pump on Ellen and talked about the breastfeeding habits of his wife, Rebecca Romijn, who recently had twins. "I'm not saying anything dirty, it's natural but [Rebecca] does what we call the double football – which is just incredible, because it's like three beings attached," he says. "It's like something out of Cirque du Soleil. It's crazy." [People]
• Apparently the rumors that Mickey Rourke and Courtney Love were hooking up are not true. In this video he says he'd rather "be on a deserted island with a gorilla." [TMZ]
• Angela Suleman, the octuplets' grandmother has been put under a gag order after it was revealed that she may have been paid for her interview with RadarOnline.com. Her daughter Nadya's publicist said: "I had to put a gag on Nadya's mother, who sold her out… They paid her $40,000 to sell [Nadya] out, and she can't talk about her daughter for three months." [Perez Hilton]
• Hilary Duff will appear on the Diet Coke Style Series during fashion week, being interviewed along with Christian Siriano and Heidi Klum. [Ad Rants]
• Bon Jovi is suing a former employee of the arena footbal team he owns, the Philadelphia Soul, for allegedly making his own version of their championship rings and selling them to the public. [TMZ]
• In this video, Ashanti says she doesn't know if she'd call the cops on an abuser like Rihanna (supposedly) did. [TMZ]
• Will Smith says he and wife Jada have "reached out" to both Chris Brown and Rihanna and offered to do whatever they need, even if they just want to be left alone. "If there are mistakes people make, then they should be willing to live up to the mistakes and do whatever penance they need to do. I don't think it's up to us, specifically the media, with such a fast hand to try to chop someone's head off," says Smith. [People]
• Handsome gentleman John Legend on the Chris Brown/Rihanna situation: "I know both of them. I was surprised when I heard because it doesn't strike me as something Chris would do. "You never know what's inside people or what can trigger that. It's an awful story. I feel terrible for both of them but if Chris did what they said he did, that's unacceptable. He has to accept the consequences of it." [People]
• Teenyboppers, brace yourselves: Nick Jonas and Selena Gomez have split up. [Perez Hilton]
• Mandy Moore talked about her recent engagement to Ryan Adams on The Bonnie Hunt Show and says she is "very happy." [People]
• Former Ronette Estelle Bennett died Wednesday at her home in New Jersey at age 67. Along with the rest of the group, Estelle sang the 60s hits "(Walking) in the Rain," "Baby, I Love You," and "Be My Baby." [Pitchfork Media]
• Naomi Watts says her Clive Owen, her co-star in The International is "not to me in real life. On the screen, yeah." She added, "[Owen] is a total pussy cat, incredibly funny, great kind of British schoolboy silly sense of humor and likes to be teased, can laugh at himself. But incredibly focused and well committed to his work. I loved working with him." [CBS News]
• Carrie Underwood says she's anti-Valentine's Day. "I don't believe – and this goes for anybody – your man shouldn't love you for one day out of 365. He should love you 365 days out of the year. I want Valentine's Day every day," she says. [People]
• Being on the road in his tour bus must be so hard for Tommy Lee. He says: "Well there's a shower, there's a kitchen, a Pro Tools recording system, a Jaegemeister machine, both formats of Playstation, and Xbox. I don't have a stripper pole - that'd be kind of fun too. I think I'm missing that. But then again, we don't really need a pole. You don't need a pole to strip right? At least on my bus we haven't needed one yet." [NY Magazine]
• "Because I am a mum, my uniform is jeans and trainers and T-shirts. I was raised as a tomboy with boys and I never really feel like myself when I am really dolled up at premieres and showbiz events." - Isla Fisher. [Reuters]

(All images via Bauer-Griffin.)

• Sean Penn and Robin Wright Penn are divorcing. Which is heartbreaking. We just don't want to think of Princess Buttercup feeling sad. [People]
  
• Jessica Alba and baby daddy Cash Warren are making it legal and have announced their engagement. Honestly, does anyone care? [USA Today]
  
• Poor Amy Winehouse: Has to go to court in Norway to deal with a marijuana possession charge. Hasn't our girl been through enough? [People]
  
• Ashley Olsen: Now thinner than Mary-Kate. [MSNBC]
  
• Given that the Jessica Simpson-Luke Wilson romantic comedy Blonde Ambition that opened over Christmas grossed only about $1,000 at the box office, Simpson's next film project, Major Movie Star, will be headed straight for DVD. [Page Six]

• We think that 3,000 picketing writers would make for the best Golden Globes ever. [NYT]
• Is Sienna Miller getting engaged to Rhys Ifan for her birthday today? [The Sun]
• Awkwardness abounds as the studio tries to find a way to promote the Ryan Philippe/Abbie Cornish film Stop-Loss without making the focus being the fact that it was working together on the project that Philippe and Cornish started a relationship. [Page Six]
• Miley "Hannah Montana" Cyrus and her also-15-year-old beau Nick Jonas have broken up. We would say "Oh they're only 15, this isn't even a real relationship," but then we remember Jaime-Lynn Spears. [Page Six]
• Does the fact that Miley has some not-so-innocent photos floating around the Internet have anything to do with it? [MSNBC]
• Marisa Tomei: Goes to church! What would George Costanza say? [Page Six]
• Glenn Close says her role in Fatal Attraction saved her marriage. We say that's kinda weird. [Daily Mail]
• Rebecca De Mornay was charged by the Los Angeles D.A. yesterday for two counts of misdemeanor driving. [TMZ]