[Aspen, December 21. Image via x17.]

Kelly Osbourne and Luke Worrell as Bacon and Eggs: Yes, I know this combo costume has been done to death, but these two are so cute that it totally works. They look warm and happy. And how fun is Kelly's bow?

[Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

The Stefani-Rossdale Crew Gwen and the boys, Zuma and Kingston, look adorable, but Gavin totally blows it by not bothering to wear a costume. Unless, of course, he's one of those people who says things like, "I'm Captain Holey Jeans," to explain his lack of Halloween gear. But still. Come on, dude.

[Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

Brooke Shields: Her daughters are clearly an angel (or a butterfly?) and a mermaid, but I'm not sure what Brooke is dressed as. Any guesses?

[Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

The Pitt-Jolie Crew: I'm not sure what Angelina is dressed as, but Brad is clearly dressed as DJ Lance Rock from Yo Gabba Gabba, which is beyond awesome.

[Image via RadarOnline.]

LaToya Jackson: I'll admit that I'm not quite sure what LaToya Jackson is supposed to be, but she did spend her Halloween night raising money for "AIDS Project LA" by posing with impersonators of her late brother, Michael, which is simultaneously sweet and creepy, though I guess the fact that it was all for a good cause moves it more into the sweet column.

[Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

Heidi Klum Heidi, who is somewhat known for her love of elaborate Halloween costumes, ended up going as "a black crow," as did her husband, Seal.

[Image via WENN.]

Christina Aguilera and her son, Max, wore matching skeleton suits. Very cute!

[Image via WENN.]

Christina Ricci and her boyfriend, Curtis Buchanan, did the mime thing, and quite well.

[Image via INFDaily.]

Paul Rudd and his son, Jack, apparently went as adorable for Halloween.

[Image via INFDaily.]

James Gandolfini, meanwhile, put on his best Homer Simpson disguise.

[Image via INFDaily.]

Ice-T and Coco Coco decided to go devilish...

[Image via Getty.]

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon while Mariah and Nick decided to be angelic.

[Image via Getty.]

Gene Simmons And finally, Gene Simmons went as, well, Gene Simmons.

[Image via WENN]

• Lady Gaga, Gay Activist! She "was the highest-wattage celebrity to attend both the Human Rights Campaign dinner Saturday night and the National Equality March on Sunday." Reporter Dan Zak writes:

"Nearby rally-goers screeched her name. She had marched with the crowds from her hotel after shrugging off security concerns, and had just finished a short speech to an enraptured throng of tens of thousands on the West Lawn. Glittery signs reading 'Gay for Gaga' and 'Lady Gaga {heart} Equality, U Should 2' poked up from the rainbowed masses." "I will never turn my back on my friends," said Lady Gaga, before disappearing from the rally. "Today is not a one-off performance."She also said: "In the music industry there's still a tremendous amount of accommodation of homophobia," she said. "So I'm taking a stand… I'm not going to play one of my songs tonight because tonight is not about me. It's about you." She sang John Lennon's "Imagine," but changed some of the lyrics. [WaPo]

• Miley Cyrus and her sister Brandi ate $70 worth of meat and mac 'n cheese at the Outback Steakhouse in Burbank last week. Miley paid with a $100 bill… and kept the change. Her spokesperson explains: She didn't know she was supposed to tip unless she was eating inside." Pardon? When has that ever been the case? [Rush & Molloy]
• Christina Hendricks married Geoffrey Arend — he was hilarious in 500 Days Of Summer! — at Il Buco restaurant in New York on Sunday. Congrats! [People]
• Jon Gosselin says that he wasn't the only one who took cash out of the joint account; Jon filed papers claiming Kate withdrew over $60,000 from their joint account between July and September 2009. But a source says Kate's transactions were legal; Jon didn't have permission. [TMZ]
• Jon Gosselin believes that Kate has control of more than one million dollars and that if she doesn't have a job, it's not his fault. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Jon Gosselin will light a menorah this year, partly because of gf Hailey Glassman. "This is the first year I will celebrate Chanukah. Everyone in my life is Jewish now, my attorney. I love it. I'm now half Jewish and half Korean. The family values are great… They gave her a free tummy tuck, worth $20 grand." I'm sure I'm not alone here when I say: Oy. [Rush & Molloy]
• Dina Lohan says that Lindsay's brother Michael is on academic scholarship at Ithaca (college)… and "He's also is doing a movie!" This paper reacts with the headline, "Oh no! Not another one!" [The Sun]
• Katie Holmes wants to send Suri to Catholic School, and noted Scientologist Tom Cruise is okay with it. Suri is already enrolled in Catholic Charities Yawkey Centre For Early Education And Learning in Boston, where Tom is filming the movie Wichita. [Daily Mail]
• Angelina Jolie is in talks to replace Charlize Theron in the thriller The Tourist. [JustJared]
• Prince Harry and Chelsy Davy: So on. [People]
• Nick Cannon is married to Mariah Carey. He's also a stand-up comic, a rapper, an actor, a D.J., a screenwriter and a television host and the chairman Nickelodeon's TeenNick division. [NY Times]
• At the BET Hip-Hop awards on Saturday, T.I. won, though he is in prison; Jay-Z was honored as MVP of the year; the late DJ AM won "DJ of the Year." Kanye West did not attend. The show airs October 27. [AP]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Kourtney Kardashian is expecting a baby boy. [NY Daily News]
• Mad Men's John Slattery doesn't want a garbage trucks garage in his New York neighborhood. [AP]
• "Fergie is Condoleezza Rice - if Condi knew how to execute a booty shake…" claims this profile of the singer, in which she talks about ecstasy; crystal meth ("it ruins you"); dating Mexican gang members and being a child star. The reporter also writes: "There is some speculation that Fergie is older than she lets on (seems unlikely; she grew up on TV), as her unquestionably sexy features can look a touch - how can I put this? - ravaged." [Times Of London]
• Kelly Bensimon was doing man-on-the-street interviews for Gotham magazine yesterday… and her efforts were taped for Real Housewives. [NY Post]
• Debi Mazar helped Maksim Chmerkovskiy get over ex-fiancée Karina Smirnoff with home cooked meals. Heartache doesn't mean stomachache. [People]
• Remember when Michael Jackson played a character on The Simpsons? The folks of The Simpsons were freaked out by him. [NY Post]
• Speaking of Michael Jackson, a snippet of his song "This Is It" has hit the interwebs; listen at the link. [TMZ]
• By the by the illuminated white glove Michael Jackson wore on his 1984 Victory tour sold for almost $70, 000 at auction. [The Sun]
• Katherine Jackson will not inherit 40% of her son's estate. [Carey Hart are HOT in this photo shoot for his tattoo shop's clothing line. [Daily Mail]
• Amy Winehouse "looked frail and unsteady" singing backup for her goddaughter on the TV show Strictly Come Dancing. [Mirror]
• Couples Retreat raked in $35 million at the box office; this column suggests the film "offers a lesson in moviegoing: add one beautiful location to a comedy that is not very funny, add to it actors who aren't really very famous, and you can make a movie that opens to reviews that aren't very good, yet still make cash hand over fist." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Saturday Night Live's Bill Hader has a new baby and says of fatherhood: "I think it's going to be awesome." [Celebrity Baby Scoop]
• In a poll of 100 New Yorkers, 26 women and 27 men think David Letterman is a "hypocrite for making jokes about the affairs of Bill Clinton and other politicians." 22 women and 31 men have worked at a place where the boss was having an affair with an underling. [NY Mag]
• Singer Stephen Gately, of Irish group Boyzone died Saturday while vacationing on the Spanish island of Majorca. [CNN]
• Stephen Gately may have chocked on his own vomit after a "drinking session." [Daily Mail]
• "Matt Lucas will not return to his stage role following the death of his ex-partner, it has been announced." [The Star]
• Mickey Rourke talks about using the word "faggot." Sorta. [TMZ]
• Dannii Minogue was judging X Factor when this guy Danyl Johnson sang "And I'm Telling You" from Dreamgirls. Danni insinuated that he was gay by telling him he didn't need to change the gender references in the song. Simon Cowell was pissed about that. [Daily Mail]
• Arnold Schwarzenegger is on Twitter now, posting pictures of the happy face in his morning oatmeal and so on. [NY Post]
• Sigourney Weaver is trying to promote a Gorilla Rehabilitation and Conservation Education, (GRACE) in the Congo, which will rescue and rehabilitate orphaned gorillas, saying: "These little gorillas just steal your heart. They're very sensitive creatures. So it's no surprise that this is a very demanding and ambitious project, the GRACE Center, but we need it. We have to have it." [AP]
• "Pierce Brosnan almost turned down the chance to star in his upcoming flick, The Greatest, about two parents struggling to move on after their son dies in a car accident — because his own son Sean survived a similar crash in 2000. "When I first got the script, I looked it over and put it under my bed for a week," he says. "I eventually decided to do it because I liked it, but it was hard to go to those deeper places in my heart." [Gatecrasher]
• Director Mike Nichols has been selected to receive the American Film Institute's 38th AFI Life Achievement Award. Nichols won an Oscar for directing The Graduate; was nominated for a best picture award as a producer for The Remains of the Day and his credits include Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, Catch-22, Carnal Knowledge, Silkwood, Working Girl, Primary Colors, Angels in America, Closer and Charlie Wilson's War. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Horn Lake, Mississippi's Circle G Ranch — also known as the Elvis Ranch, is up for sale, if you have $6.5 million. [UPI]
• High-brow PBS soap opera Upstairs Downstairs is being remade. [NY Post]
• Blind item! "What Oscar-winning actress and her Oscar-winning husband are said to be close to splitting? She's telling friends, 'We've grown apart.'" [Rush & Molloy]
• "I get why chicks dig him. He's extremely kind, incredibly intelligent, thoughtful, creative and respectful. I don't discuss my love life because it's always misinterpreted or put under the microscope. It's especially annoying when you're dating someone else who's well-known, which is why I normally would never go out with a famous guy. Let's put it this way… I'd be flattered if someone hit on me tonight, but I really can't say if I'm available or not." — Emmy Rossum on Adam Duritz. She also says: "I used to be an artsy, quiet, kind of chubby kid — which no one believes. But now I'm really comfortable with my body and my sexuality. I can be naked with the lights on." [People]00
• "My hair has never been that great. I had a Jheri curl at one point in my life. I had to go to rehab and confess, 'I'm Chris, I have a curl.' But, I don't think men are into their hair that much. Guys are concentrating on other things. When I was younger, I had a complex, and probably still do, about just not being buff and big. I think that's what guys are into. There are some right here in Hollywood, men on television right now, with fake pecs and stuff." — Chris Rock made Good Hair, but he doesn't think about his own that much. [Parade]
• "I think if she were playing something that was going to be really hard for her psychologically or damaging, I'd be more concerned, but she had a really good time with the sex thing, She plays a woman who, as far as I can tell, is really in charge of her life and is not a victim. So it sounded to me like it would be a blast. I've already seen little bits and pieces of some of the nudity and she looks beautiful. If you have it, why not?" — Susan Sarandon, on her daughter playing a student by day and a stripper by night in Californication. [Gatecrasher]
• "I've been corresponding with Anya Camilleri [the director] and we've been looking at historical paintings where the concept 'cougar' was depicted to try and see where it came from. I think 'cougar' is a way to make it appear as women are looking at their men as prey, and gaining something from it. Like when men are enhancing their own virility by going out with younger women. Why is there not a term for older men with younger women? I don't think Mrs. Robinson was a cougar — I think she was a woman having a breakdown, and it was played wonderfully." — Sharon Stone, who will play a woman who hires a much-younger gigolo in upcoming flick Satisfaction. [Gatecrasher]
• "I had dairy a few weeks ago by accident and I knew because the next day I was all phlegmy. And I was farting and it was gross. And then I knew. It was dairy. Plus it makes you fat. Instantly. [There] was a time in my life where I was not interested in health at all; health was a dirty word. And when I look at pictures now, I see that I looked tired and puffy and stressed." — Alicia Silverstone, whom this paper calls "the most non-annoying vegan on the planet." [NY Post]
• "I guess everyone has their wild side, and mine was halfway between being really shy and kind of a goofy spazoid. I never bit anyone, like Max, but I slapped a lot of butts. I don't know if you've seen kids do that-butt-slapping. Like, slapping the butts of my grandparents and babysitters. When I wasn't shy, I overcompensated." — Karen O of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, who did the soundtrack for Where the Wild Things Are. [NY Mag]
• "In an interview, Lars said he thought he reminded me of my father… and now, of course, I could make that link. He's very sincere with his questions and fears. He's a real artist in that way. He never censors himself... It was a weird relationship. The moments when it was just the two of us were pretty awkward… [Still] I had the feeling that he was inside me. He understood every blink, every detail. I felt as if I were portraying him, even though we were dealing with female sexuality. The anxiety and fear in my character was pretty much him." — Charlotte Gainsbourg, on Antichrist director Lars von Trier, whom this article notes has been called "Misanthrope. Misogynist. Pornographer. Xenophobe. Enfant terrible. Child." [BlackBook]
• "President Obama seems very authentic… I wonder if there's a white man inside of him." — Lars von Trier. [BlackBook]

Gabourey "Gabby" Sidibe's plum-colored gown has questionable sleeves, but she looks happy and comfortable.

IMdB tells me that Chyna Layne was in Cadillac Records and something called STD: Sexually Transmitted Demons. Her one-sleeved gown is not for wallflowers! It kind of looks like wallpaper, but I love the color, and the large bow on one side reminds me of the Baroness in The Sound Of Music.

Sherri Shepherd looks fantastic, though I think she'd benefit from a more open neckline.

71-year-old Jane Fonda appears to be wearing LEATHER PANTS. And looking fierce while doing so.

Harvey Keitel's glasses = Awesome.

Precious actress Xosha Roquemore looks adorable in this little strapless number.

Paula Patton is stunning, and I dig her interesting LGD — little gray dress — but the booties just aren't right.

Mariah Carey shows off her hourglass figure in what seems to be a long-sleeved American Apparel tee.

Mariah's husband Nick Cannon: Dapper.

Steve Buscemi and date: Charmingly rumpled.

I can't decide if Oprah's BFF Gayle King looks casually elegant, needs a shorter hem, or both.

You've gotta love the rock 'n roll nonchalance Lenny and Zoe Kravitz bring to the red carpet. Everything's a little bit off, yet it all works somehow.

I love that line in Mary J. Blige's The One" where she sings, "I ain't saying that I'm the best; but I'm the best." The lady looks amazing. You are the best, Mary!

[Images via Getty.]

Life & Style
"Slim Down Super Fast."
Did you know that if you dance all day instead of working at a desk, you can lose weight? Kelly Osbourne says now that she's on Dancing With The Stars: "I do five hours of rehearsals a day — sometimes even six." Debi Mazar says: "I've lost 11 pounds, and I've noticed my body toning in weird areas — my bra bulge is gone." This six-page extravaganza of peeps who lost weight dancing includes Mya — who was "soft" but is now "toned"; Kathy Ireland, who was "full-figured" but is now "foxy" and model Joanna Krupa, who was "thin" and is now "athletic." Moving on: In a poll titled "Who'd You Want To Be Frisked By?" Jon Hamm wins with 42%! (See image 7). The "cutest Jolie-Pitt pics ever" involve Shiloh buying snacks and making faces. "Perpetually single" Jennifer Aniston found herself in a "sticky situation" because Brad Pitt, John Mayer and Gerard Butler were ALL in New York City AT THE SAME TIME. Imagine that: Being on the same island with all of your exes! And 1.4 million other people! According to handy map provided, John Mayer was downtown in his apartment; Brad was uptown at the Essex House and Gerard ate at a restaurant in Tribeca. DRAMZ. Lastly: "Real" "Housewife" Kim Zolciak would like for America to know that she has never been a stripper: "I'm honest about the fact that I'm dating a married man," she says. "If I'd been a stripper, why wouldn't I tell you?" About her hair, she says: "I have great hair. It's shoulder-length, and it's the same color as most of my wigs. I have naturally black hair, but I bleach it."
Grade: F (runaway bride/missing groom)

In Touch
"I'm Going To Be A Mom."
What she means is: Someday. Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey granted the mag an interview, and when asked if they want a family, she said: "Definitely." He said: "It's at the forefront of our minds. We're very close, but we want to enjoy our first year together." Nick also says that they'd like two kids but "we want to make sure we're ready when the time comes." Mariah has been staying fit by jumping on a trampoline, but she says she wouldn't mind gaining baby weight. "I'd be fine with it," she claims. Oh, and they ask her about turning 40: "Honestly, I never thought I'd live this long." She goes on to explain that she thought she'd die young, like Marilyn Monroe. Oh, Nick says of Eminem: "I don't respect him as a man… He and I need to have an old-school sit down." Moving on: Alongside blurry pictures of the Kardashian wedding, there's news that Lamar Odom's ex, Liza, was so upset about the nuptials that she tossed out thousands of dollars of his possessions from the NY apartment they had shared with their two kids. His kids did not attend the wedding. Neither did Khloe's stepbrother, Brody Jenner, whose girlfriend, Jayde Nicole, is suing Joe Francis, who is BFF with the groom. Next: Jon Gosselin's lawyer spoke to the mag about why Jon delayed the divorce and the guy says: "A divorce, especially for a woman with 8 children, is a very very traumatic thing. But as the mother of his children, [Jon] doesn't want her to have a nervous breakdown." To "win" fans back, Jon and Kate may appear together on Oprah, where they can iron out their differences on national TV. Oh, and a source says Hailey Glassman's parents want her to stay away from Jon. Next: Brad Pitt and Angelina are "purposely" being seen apart in public so that IF they decide to separate, it will come as less of a shock. "They plan to play up the fact that they never really defined their relationship in traditional terms," says a "friend." "They will say when they met, they were on the same page about having children, but neither wanted a life-long partner." Um, okay. He went alone to the Clinton Global Initiative not because she was home with the kids, but because he was making a point about being seen alone. Says a source. Also inside: Britney Spears has reunited with Jason Trawick; they went to a candy store with her kids. He is still her agent, he just can't be in a high-profile relationship right now, an insider says. Lastly: This mag calls out Us magazine for printing a cover story about Jessica Simpson spiraling out of control and finding solace in booze after the disappearance of her dog, Daisy. A friend says: "Of course she's sad about Daisy… but it's so blown out of proportion. She's not drinking excessively."
Grade: D (shitty wedding DJ)

Ok!
"My Dream Wedding."
Khloe sold her wedding snaps to Ok!, and they printed 13 pages of Kardashian pictures and info. How anyone could possibly care is a mystery. Margaret says the most notable thing about the story is that the ceremony was done so quickly that all of the bridesmaids' dresses don't fit properly, and the groom's pants need hemming. (See image 8 and image 9). Kim, whose dress is totally straining and pulling, says: "I was freaking out because I had mine tailored really tight. There was some crazy working out and taking Quick Trim to try and get in shape." Vera Wang is a friend of the Kardashians, and custom-made the bride's dress. Khloe says: "If Vera didn't think our marriage would last, she wouldn't have done it." Next week: Reception photos! Moving on: A source says Brad told Angie that if she got up to 115 pounds by November, he'd "move forward" with child number 7. The story reads: "Angie's been noshing on crepes, omelets. pasta and garlic bread, all prepared lovingly by her partner." A source says: "It's not like Brad's force-feeding her. But he's trying to steer her in the right direction." Kevin Federline wants to lose weight before he joins Celebrity Fit Club. Apparently he blames stress from his unstable custody situation and "Jamie Spears' spicy grilled meats" for his heavy physique. Lastly: Jennifer Aniston had dinner at Monkey Bar in NYC; John Mayer had dinner at Gemma — but pals say he wanted to be sharing a table for two with Jen. "He's been trying to get back into her life," says a friend. "He begged Jen to let him join her on her upcoming trip to Cabo."
Grade: D+ (fallen/broken wedding cake)

Us
"it's Over!"
About a month ago, Justin Timberlake told friends "it's over" with Jessica Biel. He's over it; she's too much to deal with. Except they're always off and on. Anyway, she refuses to accept it, and is pretending nothing's wrong, because "she needs him emotionally and for her career." Says a "pal." But after the VMAs, Justin was "clearly on the hunt." Lindsay Lohan has claimed that she hooked up with Justin several times while he was with Jess, and in June, she Twittered something about him being a cheater. She claimed she'd been hacked, because Justin told his network of people to ban Lindsay and make her life miserable. Apparently when Justin was first getting together with Jess, he visited her on the set of a movie she was making, but wore disguises — beards and hats — so as not to be recognized. JT's cheating rumors include Kate Hudson, Lindsay Lohan and Ciara, though a source says of Lindsay: "Her record of truthfulness is not awesome." The good thing about the "Celebrity Arms Race" is that everybody wins. The bad part? Michelle Obama is a "celebrity." (See image 10). On the "Are They Too Young?" page, we learn that 85% of people think it's okay for a four-year-old to wear a bikini; 48% think a four-year-old is not too young to have a manicure. 76% think Suri is too young to wear heels. (See image 11). Lastly: Raise your hand if you wish you could go inside the Gossip Girl closet!!! (See image 12)
Grade: C- (terrible weather for outdoor ceremony)

Star
"It's On!"
Justin is "pressing" Rihanna to plan another hookup. (They tried to keep their VMA hookup a secret, but Jessica found out within days.) An insider claims: "They like excitement of sneaking around… They got off on keeping it on the down-low." Once, they were alone in the studio late at night working on RiRi's new album, and Justin was joking about strippers — he said she needed to entertain him like that. So Rihanna gave him an impromptu lap dance. "She likes to test the boundaries," says a source. But! RiRi doesn't want to be seen as a boyfriend stealer. She wants it to be publicly out there that JT is single before she commits to him. Anyway, they've been talking and texting, but Rihanna wants to be sure she's not a "lady on the side." Just an FYI on those "exclusive photos": One shows the side of her head and the back of his head; the other shows the back of both of their heads, standing near each other in a crowded club. Not exiting. Moving on: Blind item! "Which singer has rebounded after splitting from his wife by secretly bedding his sexy twenty-something assistant? And no, it's not the one he's been photographed with." Our guess: Usher. Nicole Richie lost 14 pounds in the first seven days after her son Sparrow was born — "and she keeps getting thinner." Wait, are they including the actual infant in those 14 pounds? Anyway: Her secret is "lots of fruit, veggies and fish" and no carbs. The mag says people are "shocked" by her weight. Jennifer Love Hewitt is "scary-skinny." An eyewitness saw her in L.A. and said she looked "frail and drawn" and her face was "achingly thin." Could it be that she's lost her appetite due to love troubles? Lastly: Ashlee Simpson has a crush on her Melrose costar, Colin Egglesfield. They were getting touchy-feely between scenes on September 23 — while Pete Wentz was on tour in Dallas. Ashlee was hugging him and holding his hand and "doing the whole hair flip thing," a spy reveals.
Grade: C (stained bridal gown)

Click "full size" to enlarge.

In the first clip, Mariah performs her new single, the cover of Foreigner's "I Want to Know What Love Is." In this clip, she drops the f-bomb.


Later, Mariah's hubby Nick Cannon came out and revealed to Oprah how he proposed. (Spoiler alert: It involved Ring Pops and "pink-yet-lavender."

1.) One Life to Live Does Grey Gardens
During a drunken daydream, one character on the soap imagined life as Edie Beale. They did a musical number, and the Costume of the Day speech, although the accent was way off.

2.) Joan Rivers on Live TV
I love that for her publicity tour for her new reality show, she keeps dropping F bombs on live television.

3.) Police Women Get Stuck With The Vagina Jobs

4.) Moe
Former Jezebel editor Moe Tkacik was on MSNBC on Tuesday morning, where she talked about the economy and possibly got hit on.

5.) Do You Remember the Time?
It was discovered that a 3000-year-old tomb of a mummified woman looks exactly like MJ.

6.) Lesbians Aren't Into Sausage Parties
Zing to you, Gordon Ramsey!

7.) Wasted Housewives of Atlanta
I love how drunk and loving NeNe and Kim got at their "let's be friends again" dinner.

8.) Who Pulled Tiger Woods' Finger?

9.) Do You Wanna Hear Someone From Chicago Pronounce "Coup d'état"?

10.) Why Am I So Obsessed With Her?
Her feigned modesty is one reason.

• A source claims that Jude Law, who, as Dodai mentioned yesterday, is currently caught up in another scandal involving a 24-year-old model who is carrying his fourth child, gets into such situations because he's seeking validation about his looks. [DailyMail]

• "It's actually embarrassing how much validation Jude needs about his looks. He is constantly looking in the mirror at his bald patch and always needs to be told he looks okay," says a source, "We all laugh about how he will bed anyone young who flatters him. This particular affair is just another case of some woman saying how handsome he is. He simply can't resist." [DailyMail]
• Samantha Burke, the mother of Law's child, released a statement via her lawyers about her pregnancy yesterday: "Samantha, her mom, and her family can affirm that Jude has been responsive and supportive throughout the relationship and pregnancy, and know that he will remain so as a father once Baby Sophia is born." [People]
• Law is reportedly afraid that Burke will release intimate photographs she took while the couple were together during Law's time filming Sherlock Holmes in New York City: "Samantha was totally smitten with Jude and enjoyed photographing him hugely. It was a passionate fling and there was a real animal attraction," says a source, "He's been ashen with anxiety, especially because he's putting his loved ones through more stress." [DailyMail]
• "They are just really special creatures and highly evolved. To tell you the truth, I'm convinced I was a dolphin in another life and that's why I'm so attracted to them."-Drew Barrymore [ShowbizSpy]
• Jaime Pressly is engaged to lawyer Simran Singh. Pressly split from Eric Calvo, her former fiance and father of her 2-year-old son, Dezi, last November. [People]
• Paris Hilton and Doug Reinhardt are apparently back together. "They are definitely happy again," says a source. [USWeekly]
• Tim Burton doesn't understand why parents won't let their children see his films: "I don't know why adults keep fighting that," Burton says, "They keep fighting the fairy tales that have been told since the beginning of mankind. They're fighting Pinocchio. They forget what it's like to be kids. Kids like to be scared. Most great children's literature is politically incorrect, so I don't know why they can't get used to it by now." [DailyExpress]
• "People who project negativity ultimately are crying out for their own broken souls. Trying to save a hater is like trying to teach astrophysics to a wino! LOL Chuuuuch!" -Nick Cannon on Twitter, in response to Eminem's "diss track," about Mariah Carey [E!]
• "I went to a lot of therapy. I talked my head off and pounded enough pillows and confronted enough ghosts. I didn't avoid the feelings of what my childhood was. I went right into them and went as deeply as I could." She does seem remarkably free of anger or bitterness, at this point, at least. "I think people saw how hard it was for me. It's what makes me the artist that I am, it's my bag of sorrow, of human tragedy that I've lived through, and I go to this well every single time I create a character. But that no longer dictates my daily life."- Anne Heche on the difficult period she went through following her split from Ellen DeGeneres [NYTimes]
• When faced with paparazzi or swine flu, James Spader chose...swine flu? "I'm a bit phobic... I told him (the doctor), 'You should be shutting down the whole street!' So I go out, I flee the building, I'm standing outside and there are the paparazzi snapping photos and video. I can't go anywhere, there's no car, so I'm faced with that dilemma: the paparazzi or go back in the building with the swine flu. I went back in the building." [DailyExpress]
• "My problem with women is I love them all, really. If I see a woman who is sweet and innocent, I fall in love with her, I want to hug her and take care of her and all that lovely stuff. Then I see this sex-kitten type walking past me and I think, ‘Wow! That's my woman!' I appreciate women for all sorts of reasons and it can get complicated."- Gerard Butler on his "complicated" reasons for loving women. [ShowbizSpy]
• Salma Hayek is allegedly angry that Jennifer Aniston received an Emmy nomination for her stint on 30 Rock while Hayek didn't. "Salma was angry and swearing in Spanish when the news broke," says a source, "It's not that she isn't happy for Jen, but she feels her own work was as good if not better. They just gave Jen a nomination for the press. They should be ashamed!" [ShowbizSpy]
• When Ashton Kutcher was first starting out in Hollywood, he bought a ton of fake designer clothing to convince his family back home that he was doing well: "I was broke, really running out of money. I knew I had to go home for the holidays, but I couldn't expose the fact that it wasn't going well," Kutcher says, "So I bought my whole family these fake watches and fake Versace pants and fake anything I could find, like fake Calvin Klein T-shirts, so I could . . . show them how well I was doing even though I didn't have a place to live." [NYPost]
• Dustin "Screech Powers" Diamond currently owes $21,015.62 in unpaid taxes. Maybe he should start selling Screech's Secret Sauce? [TMZ]
• "Is "asks" even a word? If not, sorry 4 my layziness with grammar."- Jessica Simpson via Twitter. [ONTD]
• Renee Zellweger was spotted buying Yves Saint Laurent knockoffs. [PageSix]
• AskMen.com will be banning all Megan Fox news on August 4. ""You can have too much of a good thing," says editor James Bassil, "We're giving our readers a one-day reprieve from the woman we've been drowning in all summer." [TheSun]
• "Fucking redneck douchebaggery. Unmitigated douchebaggery. Why are they holding signs that say, 'Whatchoo talking about, Willis?' These people are called 'racially sensitive', what they should be called is racist, backward motherfuckers."-Janeane Garofalo on the Teabaggers. [Guardian]

• Though Kate Gosselin filed for divorce from Jon on Monday, the filing does not contain custody information at this time. Will Kate ask for primary custody? How much time will Jon get? [Star Magazine]

• By the by, those Crooked Houses Jon & Kate's 8 play in? $7,000 a piece. [ABC News]
• Kate Gosselin is on People magazine, with the cover line: "It feels like I failed." [People]
• New Jon & Kate episodes will include Jon's new girlfriend, 23-year-old Deanna Hummel. [Gatecrasher]
• "Reports this week claim Aniston has been sent text messages by Angelina Jolie demanding she 'back off'." Heh. Hahhaha. Ha. [Daily Mail]
• Is Britney Spears going to be in a Nazi movie? Brain… cannot… compute. [National Ledger]
• Rihanna didn't take the stand in Chris Brown's court case, so now Cover Girl has resumed its ad campaign featuring the singer. It's okay to think she's pretty again! [TMZ]
• Perez Hilton has released a new statement in which he says: "Words can hurt." And: "I wish none of it had happened. I can't take it back." And: "Who I am as a person and what I do for a living are two separate things." And: "Several television and radio shows over the past couple of days echoed the sentiment 'He had it coming'. Would they have said the same thing if I was a woman? Would I have 'deserved it' if I had been stabbed? Or shot? Or killed?" [Perez]
• Anne Hathaway loans her friends designer dresses out of her closet. [Gatecrasher]
• If you work for Oprah, you're going on a trip! She is taking 100 employees - and their families - on an all-expenses paid 10-day cruise around the Mediterranean. JEALOUS. [Gatecrasher via Pop Crunch]
• "Madonna is trying to recreate her beloved Wiltshire manor in the middle of Manhattan." [The Sun]
• "Fitness fanatic Madonna has banned smoking roadies from coming within 50ft of her…" [The Sun]
• Video of Zachary Quinto walking his dog with a friend who is dressed as a giant steak. Quinto falls, curses. The walking resumes. Inexplicable. [ONTD]
• LOL: Ellen's variety show will be called Bigger Longer & Wider. It debuts on TBS this Saturday at 9pm, with Kanye West, David Blaine and Nick Cannon among the performers. [USA Today]
• More drama involving Danielle Staub from the Real Housewives of New Jersey: The Smoking Gun has discovered that in 1986, she was charged with eight felonies, including extortion, cocaine possession, and narcotics conspiracy. And you know how Staub told People she was "never a prostitute. Never"? She told a federal agent she worked for an escort service. [MSNBC, The Smoking Gun]
• Great Q&A with Teresa from RHONJ at the link; she's asked if there's a little too much onyx and granite in her house abd says: "No, I don't think you can ever have too much. I coulda had more." [Newsweek]
• And! When asked, "On a scale of 1 to 10 how much does Danielle annoy you?" Teresa answers: "20." [Newsweek]
• The stuff dreams are made of: James Franco reading Proust. [Page Six]
• Were Megan Fox and Josh Brolin involved in a New Orleans fire? [Page Six]
• Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo: Over. But those hot tub pix live forever! [People]
• Liev Schreiber plays a cross-dresser in Ang Lee's film Taking Woodstock and says: "[Ang] really did like my legs. When I went to his office, the first thing he said to me was, 'Wow, you have really nice legs.' I thought, 'This part is mine.'" [NY Mag]
• Pardon my groan: The Jonas Brothers are on the cover of Rolling Stone (again) looking like they bought fake IDs and are headed to the local leather bar to watch some bear on cub wrestling. [JustJared]
• "Martina Navratilova sued for millions by 'wife' after being 'dumped without warning.'" [Daily Mail]
• Katherine Heigl will star in a romance flick called Life As We Know It, which she is producing with her mother. [Variety]
• Daniel Craig will star in Dream House, a psychological thriller about a man who moves his family to a small town only to find it haunted by the former inhabitants who were murdered there. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Craig Robinson, Heather Graham, Johnny Knoxville and Camilla Belle will join Kevin Spacey in the comedy Father Of Invention, which Spacey is producing. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Julianne Hough probably won't be in Footloose, as her acting is abominable. [Page Six]
• Audrina Patridge of The Hills is getting her own reality show, creatively titled The Audrina Show. [EW]
• Epic Marilyn Manson interview! He talks about how he felt when he and Evan Rachel Wood broke up: "My walls were covered in scrawlings of the lyrics and cocaine bags nailed to the wall. And I did have an experience where I was struggling to deal with being alone and being forsaken and being betrayed by putting your trust in one person, and making the mistake of that being the wrong person. And that's a mistake that everyone can relate to. I made the mistake of trying to, desperately, grasp on and save that and own it. And every time I called her that day — I called 158 times — I took a razorblade and I cut myself on my face or on my hands." [Spin]
• Marilyn Manson also says of Evan Rachel Wood: "I have fantasies every day about smashing her skull in with a sledgehammer." [Spin]
• John Travolta is in South Africa, as a way to honor his late son who loved safaris. [TMZ]
• Is R. Kelly involved in a scam that robbed the elderly of £1million? [The Sun]
• Bollywood actress Aishwarya Rai is involved with some kind of illegal purchase of land, uh-oh. [Times of India]
• Michael Madsen owes Pierce Brosnan and Quentin Tarantino money. Not ten bucks — like $25,000 to Brosnan and $1 million to QT. [TMZ]
• "Rachel Hunter devastated as ice hockey player fiancé calls off wedding SEVEN WEEKS before big day." [Daily Mail]
• Come on baby shake your pigskin: Gloria Estefan and her husband Emilio are buying a share in the NFL's Miami Dolphins. [UPI]
• Joan Rivers is moving to L.A. and selling her Upper East side condo and Connecticut cottage, which is "so filled to the brim with campy knickknackery that it almost looks découpaged" and where Joan keeps a photograph of herself next to the bed. [NY Mag]
• Phil Spector is now in the "sensitive needs" area of California state prison, which is separate from the "gen pop." [USA Today]
• Blind item! "Which TV star will absolutely scream when she discovers her husband was chasing girls at an L.A. nightclub over the weekend?" [Gatecrasher]
• Q. Was it fun flipping the table? A: "Fun? It was heat of the moment and it was something that came spontaneously. That was my anger coming out. I just had enough of her. I was just done. I've never done it before. Will I ever do it again? I don't think so because I don't think I'll let someone get to me like she does because in real life I probably would have stopped hanging out with her." — Teresa, of The Real Housewives Of New Jersey. [Newsweek]
• "I'd be a liar if I said it was easy. I think it's very different nowadays for working mothers. Before, a woman could take two years off - a year for her pregnancy and then the first year, but I don't think that's possible for women in showbusiness or in any industry any more. You just have to keep going - keep looking forward. If you stop, you're like, 'Oh God, it's too overwhelming.' And believe me, I've had my fair share of those moments." — Anna Friel. [Telegraph]
• "I really cannot tell you if there will ever be another Batman movie. Chris [Nolan, director] has obviously done an incredible job with it. He's devoted to the movie that he's on right now. I'm none the wiser about we'll ever be revisiting Gotham or not." — Christian Bale. Of another Terminator movie he says: "No conversation has been had about that at all." [Pop Wrap]
• "That song is about when someone said to me, 'Okay, I want to be with you until I die.' And then they gave up. I was at the point in my life where I was like, 'Okay, let's die, but I tell you what, I'm going to kill you first, because I don't trust you.' Honestly. It's hard to look back and see myself as the same person. I'm very objective now. I started to apply this really fantastic rule that they don't teach you in AA or AAA, or any other acronym: Do drugs and drink when you're happy, not when you're sad. It has a great effect. But I can't say that I did that the whole time." — Marilyn Manson, still talking about Evan Rachel Wood. [Spin]
• "She's a lot shorter than I thought she would be, but I was pleased by that. I'm happy there was a flaw. Having said that, I think Angelina is pretty talented. And a remarkable human being, and a great mom. She's definitely not like any other lady I know." — Six foot three Liev Schreiber, on his five foot eight Salt costar Angelina Jolie. [Gatecrasher]
• "I did teach Abby how to say the f-word. I taught her how to drop the f-bomb in every way possible. I said, 'You're a child in an adult's world. I can't be a child for you. When she didn't swear, I said, 'You're starting to offend me Abby. If you don't start swearing every three words then I will fine you.'" — Cameron Diaz, 36 on working with Abigail Breslin, 13 in My Sister's Keeper. [Mirror]
• "I am so often puzzled [by journalists]. Sometimes they go, 'So what's this all about? ... What do you look like when you go home? Do you dress like this all the time?' It's rude! It's not nice… [Lady Gaga] is who I am. Me and my hair bow, we go to bed together. She sleeps where I sleep." — Lady GaGa. [Yahoo News via AP]

[Los Angeles, May 17. Image via INF]

• Brooke Shields is contradicting her own reps, who said she wasn't involved in the Kiefer Sutherland headbutting incident. Now she says she "was bumped into by Jack McCollough and Kiefer Sutherland became concerned."

• In a statement issued through her lawyer she added, "Kiefer has always been a gentleman in her company. Both Jack and Kiefer are friends of Ms. Shields and she regrets this unfortunate situation." [TMZ]
• Kiefer Sutherland's rep says he's "troubled by the untruthful and self-serving information circulating regarding Kiefer..." and is confident that the D.A. will throw out the assault charge against him. [TMZ]
• Kiefer Sutherland's rep added, "out of respect for this law enforcement process," Kiefer "will not be making any comment." [People]
• Shanna Moakler and Keith Lewis, co-directors of Miss California USA, announced at a press conference that they have appointed the pageant's first runner up, Tami Farrell, the organization's "ambassador," negating Carrie Prejean's role as Miss California. Lewis explained, "If Miss California is unavailable, or if it would be unwise to put her in a specific appearance, we now have an ambassador to represent us." He added, "We've been hijacked at the moment; we've been unable to do the work at hand." [ABC News]
• Miss California USA officials also passed out a booklet at the press conference called, "Miss USA 2009 State Entry Contract: Sections violated by Carrie Prejean." In addition to Prejean's violations, it says the role of the new "Beauty of California Ambassador" is to take the reigns when the "Miss California USA or Miss California Teen USA titleholder is unavailable." [TMZ]
• Farrah Fawcett says she would have appreciated privacy during her 2.5 year battle with anal cancer, but the paparazzi have continued following her. "It's much easier to go through something and deal with it without being under a microscope," she says. She's particularly mad about a December 2006 National Enquirer story called "Farrah Begs: 'Let Me Die." She says, "God, I would never say something like that. To think that people who did look up to me and felt positive because I was going through it too and yet I was strong … it just negated all that." [People]
• When Farrah Fawcett found out her cancer had returned in May 2007 she didn't tell her family and friends at first because she wanted to prove her theory that someone at UCLA was leaking her medical information to the tabloids. "I set it up with the doctor," said Farrah. "I said, 'OK, you know and I know.' . . . I knew that if it came out, it was coming from UCLA." The leaker, Lawanda Jackson, was paid $4,600 by the National Enquirer. She pleaded guilty in December to the charges, but died in March of cancer, before the sentencing. [The L.A. Times]
• 20-year-old Dania Marin has filed for a restraining order against Ryan O'Neal because she says he's been harassing her with lewd phone calls. "He asked me if I wanted to masturbate with him. Offered me a car back if I would engage with him," she claims. "He freaked me out. I filed the retraining order because I was afraid that he knew where I lived or would come to my house. He's old enough to be my grandfather." [The Daily Express]
• Michael Jackson's London concerts may not happen because the company that was putting together a series of concerts featuring Michael, Janet Jackson, and the rest of the family, have sent a cease and desist letter to the organizers of MJ's solo concerts. They say Jackson signed a contract saying he wouldn't make another concert deal for 18 months. [TMZ]
• In a new interview, Nadya Suleman says she "exaggerated" when she said recently that she was having half of her uterus removed so she couldn't have more kids. She says she's having a "myomectomy," a procedure to remove fibriods from her uterus. She says it will actually boost her fertility, but she doesn't plan on having any more. [Radar]
• Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet say they will donate to a fund set up to pay the nursing home fees for Millvina Dean, the last living Titanic survivor. The British woman has been selling off Titanic memorabilia recently because she can't afford the fees for her nursing home, where she has lived for three years. [USA Today]
• David Hasselhoff's ex, Pamela Bach, has asked the judge in their divorce to order Hasselhoff to maintain life insurance, which would pay her support if David dies. Hasselhoff says that wasn't part of their divorce deal. [TMZ]
• Harrison Ford and Calista Flockhart are trying to adopt a girl. "Harrison's begun the process of adopting Liam too," says a source. "He's been a father figure to the boy almost since day one." [Star]
• Though George Clooney says he'd be happy to take a lie detector test to prove that Rande Gerber is not guilty of sexual harassment, the two former waitresses suing Gerber have refused to take the test. [TMZ]
• When asked about his kissing scene with co-star Jennifer Aniston in The Baster, Jason Bateman said, "It felt ... It was a good scene, I'll say that. It was a good scene." [People]
• Matthew Reeve, Christopher Reeve's son, is running the New York City Marathon to raise money for his father's foundation, which helps people with spinal cord injuries. [AP]
• Kim Kardashian says her step-father, Bruce Jenner, "has gotten a lot of media criticism in the past for getting an ill-advised partial facelift and a nose job," 25 years ago. She wrote on her blog, "Unfortunately, the result wasn't what Bruce had hoped for ... Since he's turning 60 in October, Bruce felt it was time to correct the mistakes made by the previous doctor so he went to a new doctor for a second facelift. The results are amazing! Bruce looks better than ever and he is extremely happy with the result." [People]
• "I have acne scars. I'm self-conscious about that, so sometimes I wear too much makeup to cover them up. I got acne at the start of my career. It was a stressful time. I have insecurities like anyone." - Katy Perry. [Perez Hilton]
• Ginnifer Goodwin says, "I perpetuate rumors that I've dated people that I've never actually dated ... Dorothy Parker once said something along the lines of, ‘I don't care what's written about me so long as it isn't true.' It's safe making." [W]
• When reporters harassed Fergie about when she and husband Josh Duhamel are going to have kids, she said, "Now, it's all about the Black Eyed Peas ... We'll see. At the end of this run that we're doing right now, whatever feels natural and right. I always follow my gut. So, whatever it's going to tell me is going to be right." [People]
• Jamie Foxx will host the BET Awards on June 28. [UPI]
• One week after his brother died of cancer at 37, David Cook has resumed his tour. Halfway through the song "Lie" he stopped and told the audience, "It's gonna be tough for me. I'm sorry. Do you mind if I sing a different song?" [E!]
• Morrissey has cancelled a concert in London due to an undisclosed illness. [The Mirror]
• George Hamilton says of his sexual relationship with his step-mother that began when he was 12, "It really didn't seem that strange to me. I think I'd developed enough sexual energy by then to find the whole thing… well, interesting. When I look back on it, I don't think my life was changed as a result. I certainly don't think it was abuse. If anything, I think it made sex less important. I'd lost my virginity quite early on, and this freed me up. I wasn't so preoccupied with sex anymore." [The Telegraph]
• When asked if she is concerned that she is popular in the rest of the world but not the U.S., Kylie Minogue said, "It doesn't frustrate me. It's frustrating being asked about it and the assumption that it's something really missing in my career and in my life. [Yahoo]
• For those of you fluent in U.K. gossip, Jordan and Peter Andre have split up after five years of marriage. [The Sun]
• Michael Emerson says of playing Ben Linus on Lost, "It's more physical than I ever dreamt. I mean, I thought I had reached an age where I wouldn't be doing combat anymore. I was going to be one of those old codgers. The heavy lifting I would be doing dramatically would be cigarette holders and martinis. Of course, none of that's worked out and now here I am rolling around in the jungle, fighting and shooting. I feel naked on the show if I'm not covered with bruises and dried blood." [The Huffington Post]
• Before he serves a yearlong prison sentence for possession of illegal firearms, T.I. blogged on the Huffington Post, "Through this painful process of going to court and being convicted, I realized that I had to make a change." He writes, "I hope that through my mistakes, young people can begin to learn, as I did, that we have to put our guns down and start to give our guns back. It pains me inside to hear about so many of our people dying because of gun violence." E!]
• In one of Eminem's new songs he raps about Mariah Carey, saying, "Mariah whatever happened to us? Why did we ever have to break-up? ... Nick Cannon, you prick, I wish you luck with the fuckin whore." Nick Cannon has responded, posting on his blog, "Man to man, let's meet up and deal with this like adults ... Miss Marshall, I'm going to make you wish you never spoke my name and regret the ungodly things you said about my wife." Cannon continues, "Your legacy has now been tainted from this day forth! You will now be known as the rapper who lost to corny-ass Nick Cannon!" [People]

• At the launch of her spray-tanning line Sevin Nyne, Lindsay Lohan said of criticism about her weight, "I like the way I look." She added that she and Samantha Ronson are still in touch.

• "We're friends," said Lindsay. "I'm doing great. I'm very happy." [E!]
• Rihanna had dinner last night in L.A. with her mentor, Jay-Z. [Perez Hilton]
• In this video Jay-Z ignores reporters shouting questions at him as he leaves the restaurant, but LOLs when one yells, "Is it true that Chris Brown originated the swine flu?" [TMZ]
• Comedian Diana Alouise, who claims she was once Mel Gibson's mistress, says she wants to help his wife in their divorce battle. "We had a hot love affair based on sex, alcohol and partying, but it never would have happened if I had known the truth," she says, "He told me he was married but that technically he wasn't with his wife anymore. I didn't really have any reason to believe otherwise." [The Daily Star]
• In a new interview with Playboy Shia LaBeouf tells many charming stories about his childhood, including his mom's constant nudity, pot smoking and how sexy she is. He also said of going through puberty on the set of Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle, "Holy fucking Christ! Really disgusting if I get into elaborate details. I remember my trailer was set up in such a way that Cameron Diaz's and Lucy Liu's trailers were visible through my window, through this little shade I had. I'd put down the blackout shade just enough to have my eye peeping through and get them in my crosses. I'd be inside totally going at it. Just the thought of them changing in their trailers was enough to get me off." [Playboy Press Release]
• Video of Susan Boyle singing "Memories" at a talent show in 1984. The audience member who found the tape, which you can watch at the link, says "She was so shy but she was also very attractive back then-she turned a few heads when she came in." [Newser]
• Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon celebrated their one year anniversary last night at Las Vegas at the Palms Casino Resort. Cannon produced a video of clips from their last year, which made Carey cry. "This is the most amazing person in the world," Cannon told the crowd. "I dedicate my life to her daily, and together this union is gonna last forever. She is my rock." [People]
• Heidi Klum and Seal renew their wedding vows every year in Costa Careyes, Mexico, but this year they are doing it at home in L.A. because of the swine flu. Her rep says, "Heidi was worried about border closings and her three small children. And of course, she's pregnant." [Perez Hilton]
• Heidi Klum says she doesn't know the sex of her fourth baby yet, but she plans to find out, "probably at the end of the month." [People]
• Mia Farrow is five days into her hunger strike to raise awareness about the situation in Darfur, and she said David Blaine gave her some hunger strike tips. "He told me to drink 4 liters of water. Do you know how much water that is?", Farrow wrote on her blog. "He said after 6 days I won't feel hunger." [People]
• A friend says Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker have, "always talked about wanting [more] kids, it just wasn't happening." The source said Parker, "had difficulty getting pregnant. So they went the surrogate route." [People]
• When asked how he's preparing for his nude scenes in the upcoming film Little Ashes, Robert Pattinson said, "I had a penis implant!" [Entertainment Weekly]
• Hugh Jackman's penis is named "Roger." [L.A. Times]
• A New York judge has thrown out the harassment and assault lawsuit filed against Foxy Brown by her neighbor. The neighbor claims that Brown hit her in the face with a Blackberry. [E!]
• Michael Vick is in talks to do public service announcements for PETA, in an effort to rehabilitate his image once he gets out of jail later this month. [Ad Age]
• Celebrities attending the White House Correspondent's Dinner include Steven Speilberg, Kate Capshaw, George Lucas, Glenn Close, and Kal Penn. [Politico]
• Khloe Kardashian is dating a football player, just like here sister, Kim Kardashian. Khloe has been dating the Tampa Bay Buccaneers' Derrick Ward for about a month. [Star]
• Sienna Miller is in the new film G.I. Joe but her hair is dyed brown and she's barely recognizable, as evidenced by the picture here: [The Daily Mail]
• Oprah Winfrey wrote an essay about Michelle Obama for The Time 100. She wrote, "Michelle Obama doesn't just inspire us. She affirms us with her intelligence, authenticity, depth and compassion. We see the best of ourselves in her and marvel that no matter what she's doing, she brings 100% of herself to the experience." [Time]
• Jewel wrote on her husband Ty Murray's MySpace page about Dancing With The Stars contestant Melissa Rycroft, woh has a cracked rib and can't compete this week. She said, "As bad as I felt for Melissa, who I hope feels better and comes back, I'm used to our cowboy athletes that live by the rule: "ride hurt or don't get a score." It may seem harsh, but it seems like the only way to keep things honest. If you're too hurt to compete then you can't compete. But if I were to be on the show I might change my mind. Hahah!" DWTS fans freaked out and she had to explain that she wasn't insulting Rycroft on her own blog. [Perez Hilton]
• Wendy "The Snapple Lady" Kaufman was let go by the company in 1994, then rehired a decade later. Today in a live chat with Adweek, she said, "The people who run it now ... they are morons, and they do not care about this brand and its history ... I love Snapple ... just not the people ... and the memory of Snapple ... it's weird, I know." She added, "I never thought they did a great campaign after mine." [Brand Freak]
• Conservative group One Million Moms wants people to send Miley Cyrus letters saying they do not approve of her writing in several Tweets to Perez Hilton that she supports gay marriage. Miley made comments like, "Jesus loves you and your partner and wants you to know how much he cares! That's like a daddy not loving his lil boy cuz he's gay and that is wrong and very sad!" [ONTD]
• Tilda Swinton says of her new film Julia, in which she plays an alcoholic who kidnaps a young boy and winds up in a small seedy town in Mexico, "don't expect Hannah Montana." She added, "Julia is a wreck and I had to wreck myself to play her, but, happily, I'm over it now." [WWD]
• Bill Cosby's book Come On People is being released in paperback. He says to his critics, "I've been accused of picking on the poor and all that means is 'Shut up, stop talking about them. Stop bringing it up, because when you bring it up you splash it on me also. I dislike Bill Cosby for saying this.' There are others — those fellas in the prisons — who are really very thankful for this." [The Wall Street Journal]
• Alfre Woodard says she doesn't like playing moms because, "Americans have a hard time writing moms. I'll get a script and everything's really great, everything's well-drawn, but the mom is like this character, like stock footage, they go and get that out. They plug it in, this idea of "mother." You could lift moms out of any script, no matter what the culture, what the neighborhood, what the economic status, even if it's a period mom, and you could switch them around, and they'd be the same person. I think it's because most people don't really have a human idea, a specific life that they attach to who their mother was. Their mother was there for them, so it either gets deified, or the opposite. That Mommie Dearest kind of thing. We love them or we don't, or we rebel, but we can't see who they are. That they are a person in life with taste, with sexuality, with opinions, who is pissy also, who has a right to not be the big tit for you every time you want something. And then we leave, and we go off to college or off into the world to work-you really appreciate your mom then. But there's that big chunk when you don't know your mom's faults, desires, wishes, distastes." [The A.V. Club]

• Beyoncé on her fake "screeching" recording:

"I haven't heard it but it sounds completely ridiculous." Her dad/manager Matthew Knowles adds: "At 12 years into her career, the last thing someone should be questioning is her vocal ability. That would be like questioning if Kobe Bryant could shoot a jump shot. The vocals were obviously altered." Okay okay we get it. [MTV]

• Lindsay Lohan is in Australia's Cleo magazine. She's asked: "As you're constantly in the public eye, how hard is it for you to forge successful, long lasting relationships?" She answers: "I don't think it's so hard. What I've learnt most is to keep my private life private." O RLY? Also, when asked about her "perfect evening," she says: "Staying in and watching a movie!" [ONTD]
• Lindsay talked to Ellen about her split with Sam: "When you don't know you're breaking up… Really weird." LL says the break came out of nowhere. "I had no idea what was going on. I just hadn't seen her in, like, a week. She, like, disappeared." Also, is this underminey? "I think it's been really good for me. I thought it would be so much harder and it hasn't been. My sister's been here with me." [People]
• "Lindsay Lohan is shockingly skinny again." [NY Daily News]
• Kate Moss maybe cheated on Jamie Hince with Eve Berlin from The Living Things. In Berlin. The rocker's brother says he walked in on Kate and Eve (born Yves) with his clothes off. [The Sun]
• Josh Hartnett's 911 call is on TMZ for some reason, and you can hear Josh say the words "food poisoning" and "diarrhea." [TMZ]
• What the goop: Gwyneth Paltrow gave Mario Batali free membership to that superduper exclusive gym she and Tracy Anderson opened. An insider says: "Mario is the only fat friend she has, and she wants him to change." [Page Six]
• This was in Midweek Madness yesterday but here it is again: Nadya Suleman's stripper name was Angelina. [MSNBC]
• Oh Christ: Miss California will appear at the Gospel Music Awards. [Yahoo News via AP]
• Dolly Parton had lunch in Manhattan and a blogger witness it. Dolly had an "expertly made-up ageless face, Barbie doll suit (paired with sheer black leggings), that famous platinum mane, and shoes that no other human being could possibly walk in." [mediabistro.com]
• Cyndi Lauper wants Susan Boyle to be in a film starring Cyndi and Tippi Hedren. "I think she's a kick. I really like her," sez Lauper. The movie is about "baby boomers who put their lives on hold to chase their dreams." [Reuters]
• By the way, when Susan Boyle said she'd never been kissed, that was a joke, people/ She says: "Never been kissed? I've never stopped." [Music Toob]
• Audrina is going to Spencer and Heidi's wedding this weekend. "They're two peas in a pod … I can't see either of them with anyone else." Is that a compliment? [People]
• Uh-oh! Jennie Garth found out that her husband Peter Facinelli cooked a pasta dinner for the cast of the Twilight sequel New Moon and she is not happy: "I am pissed off, because he doesn't make me pasta dinners. I don't know when was the last time the man cooked for me!" [E!]
• Rihanna and Katy Perry are boating & beaching together in Barbados. It looks so fun. I want to go to there! [NY Post]
• Speaking of New Moon, you guys can have that lame ass sparkly vampire, I'll take the shirtless hot hotties of the wolf pack. Have you seen this new picture? Soooo down with brown. And only one of them is technically underage! What's that? Their abs are Photoshopped? Lalalala I can't hear you. [People]
• NBC is considering running fewer episodes of Heroes next year, which will supposedly interrupt the storyline less. And you know, cut costs. [AdAge]
• Someone stole thousands of dollars of jewelry from Hayden Panettiere's L.A. home last week. [TMZ]
• Kanye West was "polite and gracious" when he showed up — by himself — at the Tribeca Film Festival's kickoff dinner. DON'T GET ALL NORMAL ON US, YEEZY!!!!!!1!!! [Gatecrasher]
• When filming ends on the last Harry Potter movie, Emma Watson says: "I will be . . . uncontrollable. It's been half of our lives. It's made us, it's formed us. It's such a big part of my life, so it will be really sad –and so much of the crew who have been there since the beginning are like my family." [Telegraph]
• Gillian Anderson may appear on Doctor Who. [Daily Express]
• Bruce Springsteen's wife wasn't at his concert on Tuesday night OMGAFFAIROMG. [Star]
• Alan Cumming supports New York Governor David Paterson's gay-marriage bill. "He's not doing it for political reasons. Like, when did gay marriage become something that could make you popular, for fuck's sake? That's just, like, being a little nippy, people being bitches." As for Rudy Giuliani? Cumming says: "I think he's an asshole. Please quote me on that." [NY Mag]
• Um, Elizabeth Banks will star and produce a comedy called Forever 21. Is it about disposable bar-crawling clothes? [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Since Matthew McConaughey is in a flick called Ghosts Of Girlfriends Past, he is forced to answer questions about past girlfriends. [E!]
• This just in: "Natalie Portman and Chief Executive Officer Christine Aylward launched MakingOf.com, a behind-the-scenes Web portal that provides an intimate, fresh look into the process of creating entertainment by the insiders themselves." [PR Newswire]
• Hot hottie Channing Tatum, of the critically acclaimed film Step Up, says of his new flick, Fighting: "I'm not a tough guy. I'm probably not even a good fighter." It's called ACTING, people, jeez. [USA Today]
• Anna Nicole Smith cannot rest in peace because there's always some kind of dramz in her family; this time it's her half-sister suing the publisher of her book Train Wreck: The Life and Death of Anna Nicole Smith, because she claims she hasn't been paid. [TMZ]
• Want to see a foxy picture of Christian Bale, from Empire magazine? Click click click! [ONTD]
• Prison Break's Lane Garrison has reached a financial settlement with the parents of the 17-year-old he killed in a drunk driving accident back in 2006. [TMZ]
• Mary-Louise Parker is not leaving Weeds. Had you heard that she was? [E!]
• Cameron Diaz is in talks to star in a "legal comedy" called Bobbie Sue, about a "hard-charging female ambulance chaser whose mindset makes her the ideal candidate to be the face of a prestigious law firm when a powerful client is sued in a sexual discrimination case." [Variety]
• Paul Giamatti will star in an indie drama called Barney's Version, in which he plays a man who has "led a reckless life highlighted by three marriages, two children and being a 'person of interest' in the mysterious disappearance of his bosom buddy. [Variety]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Jewel is trying for a baby. [Gatecrasher]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Jennifer Hudson is indeed pregnant. [NY Daily News, Page Six]
• Divorce lawyers are telling Oksana Pochepa (the chick who claims she's having a fling with Mel Gibson) to shut her trap. [The Sun]
• John Travolta is in Argentina shopping for land, what are you doing? [Yahoo News via AFP]
• Oh wait: This report says John Travolta is alone in Tahiti. [People]
• After five years and 241 shows at Caesars Palace, Elton John played his last show last night. Will he come back? [AP]
• Why is there a picture of Mariah Carey's husband and Spongebob Squarepants at the top of the Empire State Building? Is this real life? Is it going to be like this forever? [Gatecrasher]
• Here is old footage of Tony Danza being a whiny baby because he has to be on a local news program. [Videogum]
• Fred Durst is engaged and is the happiest man alive, should you care. [People]
• When Lou Reed is on tour, he would like to eat organic lamb, guava melon, or "LOCAL ORGANIC White Fish." [The Smoking Gun]
• Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, with Regis Philbin, will be revived this summer on ABC. [AP]
• Rob Lowe will be in TV movie on Lifetime, set your DVR. [UPI]
• Blind item: "Which hunky A-lister checks himself into swanky hotels under the alias 'King Kong'?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I was so incensed, so passionate about having a Democrat in the White House, I was insane. I was just crazed. I trust this administration. I trust Barack Obama and his intelligence and have faith that he'll do the right thing. So I've been able to relax the last few months." — Barbra Streisand. [Yahoo News via Reuters]
• "This issue is important to me. I didn't know too much about it before becoming a parent but whooping cough is on the rise. There have been a significant increase in reported cases over the past decade. Parents don't realize that they can get pertussis and transmit the disease to their babies." — Jennifer Lopez, the spokesperson for Sounds Of Pertussis. [UPI]
• "I had kind of a binge eating disorder where instead of dealing with my emotions, I would stuff them down with food. I actually went into a treatment center for it. It was definitely that excess eating to kind of just stuff all the emotions down ... I really was a creative kid who didn't know she was creative and didn't have those outlets because I was always afraid to join the theater group and not perform. The moment I started doing music, the moment I did what I loved to do in my life and committed to it, I don't have those problems anymore ... I have my outlet. I have that form of expression. I can go to the studio and talk about my feelings." — American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi. [People]
• "The most dynamic and sophisticated comedy to hit television in the last 10 years, if you like, and here it is, they're calling me. It's a great, great feeling. And as quickly as it came, I was on the set. It really felt like an out-of-body experience. 'I watch this show; what am I doing here? What is Steve Carell doing, improvising and trying to make me laugh?' They all do that. John [Krasinski] especially. He said to me the other day, 'My character hates your character so much, it makes me want to hate you in real life. Is that OK?' They're great guys, I love working on that show." — Idris Elba on his stint on The Office. [LA Times]
• "I wouldn't want to change myself too much because that would really make things a bit false. I want to receive people as the real me, a real person." — Susan Boyle. [NY Daily News]
• "You just leave them with enough food and water to survive. No, first of all, you have an amazing wife, and she gets it and handles all the craziness. And you just try to make the time you got really cool. When you're there, you're totally present, and you just bounce back and forth. At least I'm not in the military with people shooting at me. I have friends who are in Iraq. At least when we're gone, I'm in a hotel room. Maybe, I may lose my life to this really bad room service. That's the threat."— Taylor Hanson on how he handles going on tour and leaving four kids at home. [People]
• "It's none of my business, but you know what I say about that? I understand the situation. I understand passion with young kids. My personal opinion about that is, he's just a baby. He's just a little baby that don't know how to handle his emotions when it comes to a woman. And he probably hears this and thinks, 'I know how to handle my emotions'; we all think we do. But the fact [is], you look at this person and you might be crazy in love, but we don't know how to handle those feelings." — Mike Tyson on Chris Brown. [MTV]
• "I just put his foot in my mouth. There was no sucking. It was a spontaneous moment, too — it wasn't in the script. I just went for it. I still don't even know how Zac felt about me cramming his foot into my mouth. It's not like we're e-mail buddies." — Saturday Night Live's Jason Sudeikis, on his skit with Zac Efron. [Gatecrasher]

• PETA has one of George Clooney's sweaty towels and wrote him a letter asking to harvest his perspiration to make Clooney flavored tofu, or CloFu. "As a mammal, I'm offended," said Clooney in response. [E!]

• A PETA spokesperson says the CloFu will "spare animals from being killed for the table." [Washington Post]
• If you're in the market for a less disgusting celebrity food product, Sting is going to sell red wine made at his country estate in Tuscany. [AP]
• Britney Spears has reportedly been going on secret dates with her longtime talent agent Jason Trawick. But, an insider says they just have a "close professional relationship." [Yahoo]
• Though Adnan Ghalib moved to the U.S. when he was five, if his country of citizenship is still listed as his native country of Afghanistan, he'll be deported if convicted on assault charges. [The Daily Mail]
• Though it was reported recently that some of Britney's dancers were fired for failing drug tests, a source on the tour says, "none of the dancers have been fired nor have there been any failed drug tests." [Access Hollywood]
• Madonna was at Brit's concert on Long Island last night. [Perez Hilton]
• It appears the rumors are true: Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer have broken up again. "They had some disagreements and decided to not continue to see each other," says a source. "Jen is moving on with her life like she always does. She seems happy." [People]
• Chris Brown is not looking for new management according to his mom/co-manager. [People]
• Chris Brown's lawyer has requested an unscheduled court hearing on March 23 to discuss the possibility of Rihanna testifying ... or not testifying. [TMZ]
• Producer Polow Da Don's publicist is confirming that Rihanna and Chris Brown recorded a duet. [CNN]
• Rihanna went out for a second night in a row sans Chris Brown. She went to Wilmer Valderrama's karaoke night with her friends. [E!]
• Thom Yorke has finally responded to Kanye West, who said he's upset with Yorke for not saying hello. Yorke wrote on his blog: "[W]ish us all a safe journey if you still like us and you're not one of those people i have managed to offend by doing nothing." [NY Magazine]
• Chris Martin tried to convince Noel Gallagher to go green, but Gallagher says told him that he "genuinely didn't give a fuck" about the environment. [The Sun]
• U2 is considering reworking and re-releasing their debut 1980 album "Boy." Is Bono the new George Lucas? [Reuters]
• Trent Reznor is mocking Soundgarden's Chris Cornell via Twitter. He writes: "You know that feeling you get when somebody embarrasses themselves so badly YOU feel uncomfortable? Heard Chris Cornell's record? Jesus." [Perez Hilton]
• Shirley Manson posted a Facebook message to clear a few things up. She's not quitting the music industry and she's having some kind of operation tomorrow. She says: "In the unlikely event that I die or become brain damaged, can I just say that I have had the most wonderful life and can't think of a lovelier way to have lived than to live creatively and have people like you lot support me in that endeavour." [ONTD]
• If you're anxiously waiting for Mariah Carey to reproduce you'll have to keep holding your breath. In this video Nick Cannon says it'll be at least a "couple years" before they have a child. [TMZ]
• People are saying that Kelly Clarkson looked pregnant on American Idol last night, which is particularly absurd because she just said she's not interested in having children. [TMZ]
• Roger Federer and longtime girlfriend Mirka Vavrinec are expecting their first baby this summer. [Yahoo]
• A judge has thrown out a contempt-of-court conviction and ordered a new trial for Pamelyn Ferdin, 50, an animal rights activist who was the voice of Lucy in several Peanuts TV specials. She was convicted of violating a court injunction that barred her from harassing UCLA faculty members who used animals in research. [AP]
• Cheryl Burke has an incentive plan to encourage people to vote for her partner, Gilles Marini on Dancing With the Stars. "Every week we advance, he will lose one piece of clothing," Burke says. "He's the naked guy from the Sex and the City movie, and people know he has a great body. So he can pull it off." [People]
• Gospel singer BeBe Winans has been booked on a domestic assault rap for allegedly pushing his ex-wife to the ground during an argument last month. [The Smoking Gun]
• David Hasselhoff's ex-wife, Pamela Bach, was arrested for felony DUI in Los Angeles, and is out on bail. [People]
• Cheech Marin is engaged to his girlfriend of four and a half years, professional classical pianist Natasha Rubin. [People]
• According to Forbes' Star Currency Survey, Daniel Radcliffe, Miley Cyrus, and Dakota Fanning are the most bankable young stars. [The Mirror]
• Shockingly, The Hills may not continue after Lauren Conrad leaves the show. A producer says: "I can't even say if there is a next season. I have no information for you on The Hills beyond Lauren Conrad. We're focusing on this season, and this will likely be our highest-rated season yet. I think a lot of people are going to tune in to see Lauren wrap her storyline." [E!]
• Spanish director Juan Antonio Bayona, will direct the third Twilight movie. But what about director Drew Barrymore? [Yahoo]
• Michael Caine returned to the London streets where he grew up to film his new movie Harry Brown. '[The film] is about sink estates and the violence on them," says Caine. "This is a dark portrait but unfortunately it's very true and we're all responsible for it. We left the children to rot. We left these children and they grew into animals." [The Daily Mail]
• Reese Witherspoon says her new role in the animated movie Monsters Vs Aliens has inspired her to look for an action role. "I have never been in an action film before so the last third of this movie is so action-packed, it made me very excited. I think maybe I could do that." [The Daily Express]
• Women make up just 16 percent of all directors, producers, writers and cinematographers who work on the top films in Hollywood and Charlize Theron is one of them. She's produced four movies in her career, but she says, "I try not to kind of bitch and complain about what [women] don't have," said Theron. "It's a tricky thing because, I think, if you want to find that lynchpin, you can, in anything ... I look at the work that I've done and I feel incredibly proud that I've had the chance and the opportunity to work on the material that I have." [CNN]
• As you'll recall, when Charlize Theron was 15 she saw her mother shoot and kill her alcoholic and abusive father in self-defence. She says: "I don't know how to say this without sounding strange. But I feel like having this tragedy at such a young age has given me a leg up from other people. Because, man, from 16, I knew the value of life and I knew how quickly it could be taken away. And from that moment on, I made a choice to either swim or to drown, you know? ... (I have) had many painful journeys and heartbreaks since my father died, many of which I draw on for my work." [The Daily Express]
• Prince William spoke in public for the first time about losing his mother, Princess Diana. He said: "What I understand now, is that losing a close family member is one of the hardest experiences that anyone can endure. Never able to say the word Mummy again in your life sounds like a small thing. However for many including me, it is now really just a word - hollow and evoking only memories." He was speaking to families and volunteers from the Child Bereavement Charity. [The Sun]

After the whole Glitter disaster (or triumph, depending on how you see it), Mariah's been getting critical praise for her latest acting effort in Push, in which she plays a social worker…sans makeup! In this video, she further demonstrates her range, by playing a woman of limited means.

The video starts off with The-Dream and Mariah fighting over unpaid bills. He accuses her of not believing that he'll make it in the entertainment business and throws a frying pan to demonstrate his point.



He leaves, and makes it in the entertainment business. We know this because of his nice apartment and Grammy.



But he's sad.



And so is Mariah.



Especially when she cooks in their special frying pan.



This shot leads me to believe that Mariah has actually never made sausage and eggs before.



But she keeps busy by braiding someone's hair.



And allowing sexy neighbors to pump iron in her front yard.



And enjoying the simpler things in life, like Kool Aid…



Puppies from strangers…





And touching her body.



In the end, The-Dream comes back to get her in his hot car.



And she goes with him, because being poor isn't as fun as she was making it seem.



Here's the whole vid.



And here are outtakes of the acting parts, that someone named MrNickCannon posted on YouTube.

• At a concert in Seattle, Etta James said:

"You know, YOUR President, the one with the big ears? He ain't MY President. Had that woman singing for him at his Inauguration. She's going to get her ass whooped." [This Is 50, DListed, TMZ, NY Daily News]

• Miley Cyrus on her "racist" picture: "I've also been told there are some people upset about some pictures taken of me with friends making goofy faces! Well, I'm sorry if those people looked at those pics and took them wrong and out of context! In NO way was I making fun of any ethnicity! I was simply making a goofy face. When did that become newsworthy?" There's more of this non-apology if you click the link. [ONTD]
• Angelina Jolie, goodwill ambassador for the U.N. Refugee Agency, is asking the government of Thailand to give more freedom to thousands of Burmese refugees. "I was saddened to meet a 21-year-old woman who was born in a refugee camp, who has never even been out of the camp and is now raising her own child in a camp," Jolie said in a UN statement. No word on whether she is trying to adopt any Burmese kids. [AP]
• Britney's diaries: Stolen! And since her dad is making a deal for her to pen a few books over the next 10 years, she needs them to write her memoirs! What's in the journals and video interviews? Brit hears voices, had an abortion, reveals the real reason she shaved her head and threatens to kill her children. As always, consider the source on this. [National Enquirer]
• Meanwhile, Sam Lutfi is suing Britney and her parents for "defamation, libel and battery." [NY Daily News]
• While in Rio, Tom Cruise has been saying hola and gracias to everyone. Of course, in Brazil, they speak Portuguese and not Spanish. [Page Six]
• Michael Phelps spoke about his bong pic: "It's something I am going to have to live with and something I'll have to grow from. I know with all of the mistakes I made, I learned from them and that is what I expect to do from this. By no means it is fun for me, by no means is it easy." Then he had to go because he had the munchies. [AP]
• James Franco has been named Harvard's Hasty Pudding Man of the Year. The roast is February 13. [AP]
• Madonna basically swept her new man, Jesus Luz, off of his feet. Luz's former modeling agent says the two met at a W magazine shoot: "We did the shoot, and I never saw him again. She loves him and asked him to go to New York. It was something very strong, because one day everybody was like, 'Oh my god, where is Jesus? He's disappeared. After he went to the shoot, he never came back. He moved to São Paulo with the crowd of Madonna, and they changed his number, and they don't let him talk to me anymore. He asked me to close his contract and I did." Now Luz is in New York with her Madgesty, working for Ford models. Upgrade! [E!]
• Why did Jessica Alba drop so much weight after giving birth? "I did it for the Campari job. [The workouts] were horrible. I cried. And I haven't worked out since." [Elle]
• Scarlett Johansson understands men, except for one thing: "Why do they have nipples? That has always amazed me." [Sydney Morning Herald]
• Salma Hayek is launching the second annual Pampers/UNICEF program to stop the spread of maternal and neonatal tetanus. She explains: "I've done a lot of social work, primarily with abused women and women's rights. I had the baby and I had so much on my plate, and I said that this year, I'm taking a break from charity. I cannot do it all. But then this came along. And I said no. Then I read what it was, and I was so screwed because you cannot walk away from this one." [USA Today]
• Carla Bruni's family castle near Turin, Italy, has been sold to an Arab sheik for $9 million. What about your family castle? Is it made of sand? [Page Six]
• Prince Charles appears in the new Oasis video, through some creative editing. [Daily Mail]
• Holly Madison is dunzo. In addition to ditching Hugh Hefner, she's quit working for Playboy as an "editor." More time for wondrous illusions with boyfriend Criss Angel? [Perez]
• What does Lady GaGa want for Valentine's Day? "A good fuck and some carbohydrates." [The Sun]
• Orlando Bloom has signed onto a sci-fi flick called The Cross. Set in the near future, Orly plays a man seeking to cross a mysterious border, something no one else has achieved. He's good at pirates and elves, will he be good at a future-man? [Variety]
• Ang Lee protégé Tang Wei has landed her first role since starring in sexy spy thriller Lust, Caution and being banned in mainland China. [AP]
• Patrons at super British restaurant Tea & Sympathy in the West Village, NYC, got to watch Rupert Everett get up and recite his lines for an upcoming Broadway play. [Page Six]
• Ashton Kutcher wasn't going to look at the Hard Rock Girls calendar because he didn't want to piss off Demi Moore, but Demi said, "I don't give a fuck if you look at that thing." [Page Six]
• Gossip Girl's Taylor Momsen was at a party and "She kept telling people she wasn't drinking because she was on heavy doses of Percocet, as she had just had her wisdom teeth removed. Not that anyone cared - everyone was twice her age!" [Gatecrasher]
• What the world needs now: A reality show featuring freshly rehabbed Sean Stewart, as he — wait for it — starts his own fashion line. [Page Six]
• Benji Madden: Dating Audrina Patridge? [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which starlet did more than get wet with an uber-famous athlete in a pool? On top of that, a gridiron god walked in and got a gander at the action - and the twosome's pile of cocaine." [Gatecrasher]
• Aww, Jessica Simpson's flick, Major Movie Star — now titled Private Valentine — is now available on DVD, having skipped theaters all together. [NY Daily News]
• No one likes Gwyneth Paltrow's GOOP. [NY Post]
• Terrence "Baby Wipes" Howard's eyes will haunt your soul as he stares at you from the new cover of Ebony. [The Life Files]
• News network and Oasis fan MSN is launching a new gossip site called Wonderwall. The tone will be "edgy but respectful." [Reuters]
• Hugh Grant and Jemima Khan: SO ON. [This Is London]
• Kylie Minogue's hot hot man took her to meet his family in Spain. [This Is London]
• RIP Lux Interior, the lead singer of the Cramps. [BoingBoing]
• "My mom went on a date with Jimi Hendrix. My dad was a part of Strawberry Fields Forever and hung out with Timothy Leary. My parents have stories. They probably have better stories than I do. And they found God. They needed to find God. Not that they needed to find God, but God found them, really. I stopped trying to change them at 21." [Daily Mail]
• "Katy is our daughter and we love her but we strongly disagree with how she is conducting herself at the moment. We cannot cut her out of our lives as she is our child but she knows we disagree strongly with what she is doing and the message she is promoting regarding homosexuality which the Bible clearly states is a sin. But the Bible also promotes understanding and forgiveness, which I keep reminding myself. Katy is not a homosexual but I fear she has been led astray by the Hollywood crowd. I pray all the time that God will work through her and help her find salvation." — Katy Perry's mom. [Daily Mail]
• "I wore a girdle. Eight weeks after my girlfriend had her baby, you could see her six-pack. She told me to put an elastic band around my waist – any kind of band or girdle works. She was like, 'I slept in it.' I didn't recover as fast as she did. I don't have a six-pack – that's just not my body at all." — Jessica Alba. [Elle]
• "When I was in the full make-up, we had the kids come to the set, and I tried to prepare them for the moment. Their mommy tried to explain to them that 'that's daddy'. But it didn't phase them. They didn't even comment on it." —Brad Pitt on filming The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. [Independent]
• "I make fun of me all the time. I'm like, 'Call me Mr. Carey, who cares?'" — Nick Cannon. [MSNBC]
• "I'm going big. It's all about the hairdo. I love being blonde a bit more at the moment. It's so much fun. I was so focused on work that I hadn't reinvented my look in so long and I love to reinvent. It gives you a whole new attitude. It's a little scary to get out of your safe zone but I love change. It's fun and I embrace it." — Drew Barrymore on her tresses. [The Sun]
• "It's a real crucible because you feel daunted by your peers who somehow get younger and younger. People older than me have fewer lines than I do. And no, you're not supposed to talk about it; you're supposed to admire the fact that they look 22 even though they're 58." — Sarah Jessica Parker on aging, in thew new issue of Bazaar. [The Life Files]
• "I haven't spoken to Christian about it, but I have listened to most of it and he was clearly very angry. People might now realise that that is his temper, and they might understand a bit more… He is a perfectionist and if you are doing an intense scene and someone is spoiling a shot, it takes time to get it back." —Christian Bale's mom, on his tirade. [Mirror]
• "Everything was about keeping Christian happy because he was the meal ticket. If something wasn't just so, Christian would erupt. He would yell until he was red in the face. It was very intimidating. Fame began to change him. Once, when [his mother] Jenny and her mum arrived in Los Angeles, Christian sent me to the airport to pick them up. Jenny was in tears because her son hadn't come in person." — Christian Bale's former assistant, Harrison Cheung. Cheung also says that after Bale's dad married Gloria Steinem, "Gloria liked to pontificate and was going on about something for ages at the dinner table one night. Christian suddenly let out a huge sigh and said, 'For God's sake woman, shut up!'" [Mirror]

• Amy Winehouse is going to have her fun and her husband too: "“While Blake is in jail I’m still gonna have a good time — he can’t do much about it," the singer says. [TheSun]

• Winehouse, who is currently staying at a hotel in St. Lucia, says that her wild behavior, which reportedly includes begging other guests for threesomes, grabbing female guests, and generally causing a ruckus, is just a temporary bit of fun to tide her over until her true love, Blake, is released from jail. “I still love my Blake. I won’t let him divorce me. He’s still in jail but the moment he comes out I’ll be there waiting for him," Winehouse says, “I love him because he’s just like me. Blake is the male version of me. We’re perfect for each other." [TheSun]
• The producers of Speed the Plow, the Broadway show that briefly starred Jeremy Piven before an alleged case of mercury poisoning caused the star to drop out of the play, have filed a grievance with the Actors Equity Association against Piven. Piven's publicist claims the grievance is "absurd and outrageous," which is, hilariously, exactly what everyone on earth is saying about Jeremy Piven's "mercury poisoning." [AP]
• Good news, Mad Men fans: creator Matthew Weiner has officially signed on to be a part of Season 3, which airs this summer. [HollywoodReporter]
• Nick Cannon claims that he and Mariah Carey plan to have kids...eventually. "We’re definitely into planning a family and stuff but when everything calms down and we get the time,” Cannon says, “we’re just running and gunning now and enjoying being newlyweds.”[E!]
• Brothers and Sisters star Rachel Griffiths is pregnant with baby number three. [People]
• Beyonce is beyond thrilled to be singing "At Last" for Barack and Michelle Obama's first dance at the Inauguration: "I could not be more honored and excited that they have asked me to be part of this moment in history." [USMagazine]
• Meryl Streep is speaking out about ageism; not just in Hollywood, but in every profession: "Look around the room. There are a lot of young women here who are journalists, but do you see any women my age? No. And if you look into the corporate corners of your company, there aren't a lot of women there either. But we're fighting that, and we're making inroads against discrimination." [Mirror]
• 10 years after their debut album, Tommy Lee's Methods of Mayhem is coming together for a second record. Which breaks my personal record of going 10 years without remembering that Tommy Lee had a crappy side band.[Reuters]
• LOST fans: Carlton Cuse is saying that this is the "season of Josh," meaning that we're going to get a whole lotta Sawyer this time around. [E!]
• Melissa George, the latest in a string of cast members to leave Grey's Anatomy, claims she left the show to focus on other things. Yet a "friend" says Melissa had this to say: "I was supposed to have a full-blown love affair with Callie (played by Sara Ramirez), but Shonda said the network was making too many notes on the storyline. At first she commiserated with me, but then when I'd complain, she wouldn't even talk about it. My agents calls went unanswered, and I wasn't just going to sit there. Shonda promised me something and she didn't deliver. That's when I decided it's time to go."Star]
• Bust out your giant buttons, neon shirts, and overalls: the New Kids on the Block have just announced plans for a North American tour. Donnie Wahlberg says the group can't believe the positive response they've received so far: "This is beyond our wildest dreams," Wahlberg says, "The T-shirts, the screams, the emails, the messages — it's been amazing so far, and we are all just so happy to keep it going." Hey, man. Sometimes people just wanna get on the floor and do the New Kids dance. [USMagazine]

[New York, January 6. Image via INF]

Aspen, CO. December 24. Image via Flynet.

• Did a knock down, drag out fight with Lilo land Samantha Ronson in the hospital for "exhaustion"?

• According to TMZ: "Neighbors tell us [Lindsay and Sam] were going at it for a long time, but it reached a crescendo at around 4:00 AM after one of them screamed at the other, 'You never say you love me.'" [TMZ
• Gwyneth Paltrow, Madonna and Stella McCartney had a girls night out in London after Madge handed over her kids to ex-husband Guy Ritchie for the evening. Madge obviously knows that the best break up medicine (besides an affair with A-Rod) is a night out with the ladies. [Daily Mail]
• Lance Armstrong is expecting another child with girlfriend Anna Hansen. He has three children from his first marriage to ex-wife Kristin. [People]
• Girl Next Door Kendra Wilkinson is engaged to NFL player Hank Baskett. The wedding is slated for June 27 at, where else? The Playboy mansion. Initially she wanted ex-sugar daddy Hugh Hefner to give her away, but now Kendra is having second thoughts. [People]
• DJ AM, aka Adam Goldstein, is taking a page from fellow plane crash survivor Travis Barker and suing a bunch of people. "DJ AM is suing the estates of the two pilots who died in the crash as well as Clay Lacy Aviation, Global Exec Aviation, Inter Travel & Services Inc, Goodyear Tire and Rubber Co, and Learjet." He claims the pilots knew that the tires were shot and attempted to take off anyway. "Damn," says Michael K. of Dlisted. "I can understand suing companies and shit, but suing the estates of the pilots? I wonder if the pilots left behind any kids that need food, clothes and a roof over their heads. It seems a little extreme to try to fuck with the families, but I don't know the details and shit, so I will leave it at that." Word to that entire sentiment. [Dlisted]
• Marisa Tomei, 44, was conspicuously canoodling with Logan Marshall-Green, 32 (otherwise known as "Trey" from the O.C.) at the LA premiere of the Wrestler. You go Marisa! [Page Six]
• Apparently Suri Cruise gets 100 pieces of fan mail a day from all around the world. She is egregiously adorable. [Star]
• Slow gossip day, guys: Page Six reports that Bridget Moynahan uses the same dentist as her estranged baby daddy, Tom Brady. Riveting! [Page Six]
• Scar Jo's snot-filled Kleenex eventually went for $5,300 on eBay. Merry Christmas…sorta. [NYDN]
• Jennifer Hudson will perform a gospel song for her departed mom at the 2009 Grammys. [NYDN]
• Long dead drug kingpin Pablo Escobar loved Elvis, and even played his records when he was in the clink. Jailhouse rock indeed! [Page Six]
• Spencer Pratt keeps running his mouth about Heidi Montag's momma. "I just had visions of her mom trying to kill me in my sleep so I saw that as a possibility," he said at the Hills season finale party. Dear Momma Montag: we hope you have a Spencer-free Christmas and a happy New Year. [ASL]
• Ricky Martin: living la vida loca for 37 years as of today. [Dlisted]
• Though he's making a government salary now, from his Christmas shopping spree at Hermès, it's obvious that Arnold Schwarzenegger used to make the big movie star buckies. [ASL]
• Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon are in Aspen for Christmas, and Mariah says she always gets holiday-themed lingerie. “Honestly, I always get Santa lingerie. Even if nobody’s going to see it! I mean, why not? But this year I’m definitely excited because it’ll be appreciated!” Mimi says. Cant'…won't…make this lame joke…sigh. Ho ho ho, Mariah! There. I said it. [Just Jared]
• Poor Ben Stiller has to spend Christmas in a cast. He broke his hand snowboarding over the weekend. [E! Online]