(Click on lead image in each gallery to begin the show.)

The Good:

The Bad:

The Ugly:

[All photos via Getty Images.]

[Munich, Germany, November 1. Image via FilmMagic.]

• The judge in Britney Spears' custody case says "there is a habitual, frequent, and continuous use of controlled substances and alcohol by (Britney)." He's ordered Britney "to undergo testing for the use of controlled substances and alcohol." Testing will be conducted randomly twice a week. In addition, Britney and Kevin Federline must complete the "Parenting Without Conflict" program. [TMZ]
  
• Michael Jackson took his kids to see The Lion King and "they all had wigs and baseball caps on," says a source. Paris, Prince and Blanket were introduced to the cast and then MJ and the kids "ran out." [Page Six]
  
• Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban have put their four bedroom in Nashville up for sale, yawn. [Page Six]
  
• For their Best Of Beauty Awards party, Allure magazine replaced Lily Allen — who has visa issues — with Mandy Moore. Not exactly the same. [Page Six]
  
• Is Rose McGowan engaged to Robert Rodriguez? The two met on the set of Grindhouse and Rodriguez soon divorced his wife. Now Rose is wearing a rock. We're not saying he likes Rose because her name starts with R, but he did name his kids Rocket, Racer, Rebel, Rogue, and Rhiannon. [Page Six]

• Kanye West's new CD may be outselling 50 Cent's but Fiddy is number 2 on Forbes' Hip Hop Cash Kings list — he made $32 million last year. Yeah, we didn't know Forbes was so down either. [Page Six]
• Melanie "Scary Spice" Brown is accused of leaving her 2-month-old daughter with the maid for four days while she hit Las Vegas to get married. [Gatecrasher]
• A Toronto restauranteur is blasting singer Nelly Furtado's bad manners. "She made a reservation for 10 guests," Guy Rubino says. "She showed up an hour late, with five extra people in tow. For parties that size, we do a prix-fixe type of menu. Nelly objected." There's a "Maneater" joke in there somewhere. [Rush & Molloy]
• In Touch claims that Jennifer Lopez is expecting a baby, but Marc Anthony's rep says "No." [Rush & Molloy, 2nd item]
• Joel Madden on Nicole Richie: "Obviously, marriage is in our future. I don't know when or where or how, but right now our priority is our family and .. the baby." [Rush & Molloy, 3rd item]
• For a profile on James Blunt, Rolling Stone writer Austin Scaggs took Ecstasy with the singer. How awesome would it be if the article ended, "and then we made out" ? [Rush & Molloy, 5th item]
• Sean "Diddy" Combs says his fragrance, Unforgivable, will outsell other celeb scents because he "knows exactly what women should smell like." [Rush & Molloy, 10th item]
• Drew Barrymore and Justin "I'm a Mac" Long: went on a date to the Arcade Fire afterparty in Austin, TX. Sweet. [Rush & Molloy, 11th item]

The Good: Rihanna looks hot, even dressed like Barbie; Kim Stolz reminds us why she was maybe our favorite Top Model contestant ever; and Mary J. Blige could teach poor Britney Spears a thing or two on how to be sophisticated and maintain your street cred.

The Bad: Paris Hilton looks weirdly middle-aged; Nelly Furtado is unrecognizable; and Pam Anderson, well, looks like Pam Anderson.

The Ugly: Shanna Moakler's hair puts fear into our hearts; Lil' Mama gave us nightmares; and Kat Von D is to blame, we're sure, for the migraine we've come down with this morning.

And in a new special category, The Stupid: Ah, Miss South Carolina Teen USA. She might have great cleavage, but she doesn't know the difference between The Iraq and The South Africa.

[Images via Filmmagic]

• Scary-skinny Angelina Jolie tears up during an interview with Ann Curry. [MSNBC]
  
• Paul Wolfowitz and his Muslim feminist ladyfriend break up; we assume it was because she was taking a page from Jessica Simpson and letting her knockers hang out all over the place. [Page Six]
  
• Paris Hilton is reading The Power Of Now, a book that, above all, counsels readers to "stop thinking so much." Because that is so Paris's big problem! In a super-gratifying related development, the product placement has catapulted the book to the Top 150 on Amazon. [Page Six]

• Dear Nelly Furtado: The New York Post thinks you need to get all "promiscuous" again. For the revenue, babe. [New York Post]
• You know what is so totally great about drinking? Unlike thinness/fatness, at any given time you can be either 1. drunk or 2. in recovery. Just like Nicole Richie! Unless you believe that story in Star. Which TMZ does not. [TMZ]
• Britney's hometown of Kentwood, Louisiana had long been planning a Dollywood of Britney-bilia to create jobs for its poorer residents. But it was not to be... [Radar via the WSJ Informed Reader]

They say: Before performing "Maneater" at the 2007 Fashion Rocks event in New York City, Nelly cruised down the red carpet in a dramatic navy Versace dress and vintage chandelier earrings. "The cut on the shoulders was really flattering," the singer says.
We say: Her burgeoning Cousin It hair is taking her over from the crown of the head on down, while her dress seems to be choking her from the neck up.

They say: "I like to show off my curves to display the uniqueness of my body," Nelly says of her figure-hugging vintage Hervé Légér dress for the 2006 Teen Choice Awards. "When I put this dress on, it just felt funky, modern, fresh and youthful."
We say: Nelly says she likes the dress because it shows off her curves. We say we like it because what it lacks in style, it makes up for in optical illusion.

They say: Before picking up the prize for best international female at the Brit Awards, Nelly says she was "freezing my butt off" in this Sass & Bide dress. "The dress is very fun and rock and roll and the Brit Awards are pretty rock and roll."
We say: We're "laughing our butts off" at the sight of Nelly's nude stockings.

They say: For the Grammy Awards in February, Nelly was on a hunt for something "really fun and carefree" - and she found it in this elaborate Roberto Cavalli party dress, with gold lamé embroidery, beading and feather hem. "I wanted to have a good night and have a good time!" she says.
We say: What does a girl like Nelly do if she finds she's been toilet-papered enroute to a big event? Whip out her bedazzler and a big toothy grin, of course!

They say: Before picking up a Billboard Music Award for "Promiscuous," Nelly walked the red carpet at the MGM Grand in a modest vintage Vivienne Westwood dress.
We say: Wearing the drapes is always in style. Just think Carol Burnett as Scarlett O'Hara!

They say: At the David Jones fashion show in Australia, Nelly picked her own casual jeans combo, accessorized with Moschino peep-toe pumps and a Chanel bag. "This isn't a stylist," she says. "This is me putting this together and what I felt comfortable in that day."
We say: We admire Nelly's confidence in her physical stature, as a girl's got to be sure she's supermodel-tall before severing her leg line with a cropped pant.

They say: For the MTV Europe Music Awards in Copenhagen, Nelly showed off a one of a kind couture dress by Dsquared ("They're lovely people") and, on her arms, airbrushed flames. "Everyone thought they were tattoos but they were just temporary," she says.
We say: When wearing a neutral (and yes, metallics count as neutral), it's good to infuse your look with a little color. And if you do so with fake tattoos running up and down your arms — well, that's one option!

They say: At the MTV Video Music Awards Latin America in Mexico City, the Versace-clad singer walked the press line with fellow Latina Shakira before performing an eight-minute number with Puerto Rican Reggaeton group Calle 13. "It was quite a spectacle," she says.
We say: True, nothing offsets a tan quite like white. But it's not worth the skin cancer for a dress that appears to be puckering in the front.

They say: When asked to host Canada's Juno music awards, Nelly was given the freedom to wear something silly. After flying in a harness dressed "like a bird," the singer donned this crazy outfit. "I actually wanted it to be even uglier than this," she says.
We say: Our mother always taught us if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. So we'll shut up now.

Look at her:

Total natural hotness.

Complete adorable cutness.

Which is why we were a little distressed to see her at the Brit awards last night, where she won the Best International Female Solo Artist Award, and the Scariest Looking Celebrity top honor:

Now it's not the best angle, we'll grant you that, but girl looks like she's channelling the bastard lovechild of Teri Hatcher and Juliette Lewis. Had a little work done, Nelly?

Oh say it ain't so!