(you know how I know you're Canadian? You have relatives named "Gordon")

but the worst of the worst, I would say "Slobodan." It's worse than Adolf, because, while you're probably never going to meet an Adolf in your lifetime, Slobodan is pretty much a dime a dozen in the countries formerly known as Yugoslavia.

With the one exception of the Serbian Olympic Waterpolo team's goalie, no Slobodans pls.

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And Ralph is only appropriate when combined with Fiennes, but I'd probably just call him Voldy anyway.

Also, Rick's a no-go, because I'd always want to ask if he spelled his name with a silent "P." (If you get that reference, you're too awesome for words. BTW, I'd totally date a Vyvyan, but never a Niel.)

Oddly enough I've always had a thing for guys named Johnny, and I ended up marrying one.

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I call him Junior.

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