Label Closures

Christian Lacroix's namesake house teetered on the brink of collapse for the better part of this year. After filing for bankruptcy in Paris this May, owners the Falic Group announced a "restructuring" plan that would see the couture house shuttered, and the Lacroix name live on only in ready-to-wear and accessories licenses. After it became known that the house of Lacroix had never turned a profit in 22 years of operation, Christian Lacroix told the press he was "too angry to cry," and that he had been working without pay for over a year.

A frenzied campaign to save the business ensued. One couture client made an offer to buy; but during the bankruptcy process, suitors like France's Bernard Krief Consulting and Italy's Borletti Group dropped out. A relative of the Sheikh of Ajman in the United Arab Emirates made a serious offer, and seemed to speak seriously of Christian Lacroix private jets and Christian Lacroix yachts and Christian Lacroix lifestyle products; for a while, it seemed all would end well, and a fantastic couture collection was shown in July despite the cash-strapped state of affairs. However, the sheikh could not provide financial assurances to the bankruptcy court, and on December 1, Falic Group's own worst-case-scenario plans were put into place. At least 100 people lost their jobs. Christian Lacroix lost the rights to his own name, and started designing uniforms for French railway workers.

Luella, the critically acclaimed and very popular British label founded in 1999 by Luella Bartley, closed less than 12 months after being named Designer of the Year at the British Fashion Awards. The distributor withdrew its backing after the Italian company that produced Luella clothing went bankrupt. Bartley said at the time that she hopes to revive the label, when the credit crunch eases.

More avant-gard designers also have not fared well this year, as perhaps might be expected. Yohji Yamamoto announced it had filed for bankruptcy protection, with debts of around $68 million, in Japan this October. (It is continuing its operations while in bankruptcy.) Belgian designer Véronique Branquinho was forced to shutter her 12-year-old line in May. New York-based Phi, founded by billionaire's wife Susan Dell and designed by Andreas Melbostad, announced it would close up shop just this week.

Photo: A model in a 2004 Véronique Branquinho show in Paris.

Jennifer Lopez has had bad luck with her clothing lines. The star founded JLO clothing in 2007, and closed it two years later. Replacement label Justweet lasted two seasons. This June, her latest effort, Sweetface, also bit the dust. Good thing she's still raking in the dough from her perfumes.

You're Fired

After rumors swirled for months, Olivier Theyskens was finally fired from Nina Ricci. His last collection included towering heel-less Gothic boots, which later turned up in an evening ensemble worn by none other than Daphne Guinness. Peter Copping was his replacement. Anna Wintour, who allegedly gasped, "How could you do this to me?" when told the news, was so upset by the whole episode that she wrote a letter from the editor about it:

Olivier Theyskens's recent departure from Nina Ricci suggests to me that the vital role of artistic talent has been obscured in the current economic climate. My staff and I were shocked to learn that Theyskens's contract would not be renewed; and I am very concerned that the business of fashion is undervaluing the most important asset our industry requires: creative visionaries. There's a reason we continue to see Theyskens's influence everywhere, from catwalks to the mall. He'll be back, but fashion must hold its nerve. This is the mission that we at Vogue happily shoulder.

Despite this ringing endorsement, by the end of this year, all we've heard of the gifted Belgian is that he's writing a book and "discussing" a "retail concept" with Tory Burch's husband.

The whole situation at the house of Ungaro this year is just Kafkaesque in its web of intricate reversals of fortune and surprise non-sequiturs. After many strenuous denials that any such move might even be considered, might even be on the table, C.E.O. Mounir Moufarrige summarily fired young Colombian designer Esteban Cortazar for failing to generate sales and buzz for the esteemed, though somewhat dusty, fashion house — and, we later learned, for refusing to work with Lindsay Lohan.

New designer Estrella Archs was brought on board — with La Lohan as her "artistic adviser" sidekick. ("It could work," said Moufarrige.) Their collection of very short, very tight, and very embellished dresses was widely panned by critics and the line was dropped by most of its U.S. distributors; Lohan later distanced herself from the decision to style the show models with heart-shaped sparkly pasties over their nipples. Then the Times of London visited her and found a disturbing scene:

The room looks like the aftermath of one of those home-alone teen parties advertised on Facebook that then gets horribly out of hand. Chaos rules. Designer clothes are strewn everywhere; most of them from a sweep of the Emanuel Ungaro boutique that Lohan made upon her arrival in Paris, walking away with an estimated £90,000 worth of free clothes. Shoes, make-up, jewellery, even a stray lampshade obscure the hotel carpet. Her passport is in here somewhere. She's been looking for it for days.

Even Ungaro himself spoke out to attack Archs and Lohan's efforts; Moufarrige denied the disastrous reception had caused any tensions, and said Lohan would stay. Then he himself abruptly quit. Stay tuned for what happens next!

That Old-Time Revival Feeling

Halston was revived. Again. This time designer Marios Schwab was chosen to helm it, and former designer Marco Zanini and stylist Rachel Zoe were ditched.

Halston book published by Phaidon


Former Valentino chief executive Matteo Marzotto and Marni chief executive Gianni Castiglioni bought the rights to the house of Vionnet in February. The clothes, when they came, were perhaps the biggest disappointment of the year. Hint to designers: There is so much you can do with Vionnet! The real Vionnet frikking invented cutting on the bias, okay? Have the temerity to at least try something daring.

Bill Blass was one of the recession's earliest casualties. The talented creative director, Peter Som, and all the other employees were fired unceremoniously just before Christmas last year; the bankrupt label was later sold, for a bargain basement price of $10 million. (In January of this year, just before his planned show at New York Fashion Week, Peter Som lost the financial backing for his own label, too.) Just this month, the new owners, Peacock Holdings, announced Jeffrey Monteiro would be taking over the designing reins. We'll see his first collection — the Times called Monteiro's clothes "nothing startling" — next winter.

Photo of a model wearing Peter Som's Fall 2008 collection for Bill Blass, the bankrupt company's most recent.


Biba. Again.

Beyond Biba documentary poster via FashionTribes


You're Hired!

Jil Sander has the unusual distinction of having been fired from her namesake label by its new owners not once, but twice. After being told her services were no longer required by Prada group owner Patrizio Bertelli for the second time, in 2004, the German designer began a long period of fashion exile. (Perhaps she had a non-compete clause to abide by.) This year, she was spotted at an industry textiles fair scouting for fabrics — and tongues started wagging. A collaboration with Uniqlo was the surprise result, and Sander's minimalist eye is now employed as the Japanese fast-fashion chain's creative director. Her second +J collection launches in the new year.

Clothing Lines Of The Stars

In 2009, everyone who was anyone got a clothing line. (Or that potentially even more remunerative consolation prize, a namesake perfume.) In the stormy waters of a recession, perhaps it's no surprise that plenty of megabrands would seek the safe harbor of a celebrity and her or his contractually obligated promotional heft.

Not one month after finally shuttering Christian Lacroix, the Falic Group announced the launch of an Eva Longoria perfume. Despite the fact that Longoria is allergic to perfume. Miley & Max Azria did a clothing line for Wal-Mart. Toby Keith sold plaid shirts; he had that much in common with the Kings of Leon. Kevin Federline announced a children's line. Mischa Barton said, of her headband line, "People want to see that you can deliver and do, like, a good job."

Richie Rich rebounded from the 2008 closure of Heatherette with an "eco-friendly" swimwear line he created with Pamela Anderson. (I actually saw the launch of this live, in New Zealand. Richie Rich rollerskated, and the runway show concluded with Anderson, clad only in a scarf, accidentally flashing the audience during her bow.) Brad and Angelina did a serpentine collection for the jewelers Asprey. It started at $525, for a baby spoon.


Whitney Port tried to get Bergdorf Goodman to buy her clothing line in the finale of The City. The Olsen twins, after a couple years hitting the top of the market with The Row and Elizabeth and James, returned to their mass tween roots with a JC Penney's collection called Olsenboye. Emma Watson said the idea of a perfume named after her made her want to vomit, but did an ethical clothing collection with People Tree. (Mischa's other line, Tree People, sadly remains hotly anticipated, at least by me.) Katie Holmes released weird jumpsuits with stylist Jeanne Yang under the label Holmes & Yang.

And I leave you with news of the strangest star collaboration of all 2009: the announcement, in June, that John Malkovich would show a line called Technobohemian at Milan's men's wear week. We may not be John Malkovich, but we can dress like him.

What will 2010 bring? This was the year of huge falls in sales and constant readjustments; 2010's shocks, coming after this raft of closures and downsizings and layoffs and consecutive quarters of declining year-on-year results will, hopefully, seem and be modest. Nobody in the fashion industry is out of the woods yet, but perhaps it's not naïve to hope that the rate of attrition should at least slow down.

The rate of stupid celebrity fashion collab debuts, however, is a trend I expect to remain strong. At least Lindsay Lohan's second collection for Ungaro should be worth watching.

The reader writes:

One of the covers we did featured teen pop star Hilary Duff (October 2004). The next month's cover subject was actress Mischa Barton (November 2004). Our [redacted], a [redacted] by the name of [redacted]—who has quite a reputation in the biz as a [redacted] — expressed dislike at Ms. Barton's hand as it appeared in the retouched cover photography. ("Her hand looks too old and veiny," I believe, was [redacted]'s objection at the time.) Hence, [redacted] instructed our in-house digital retoucher to lift Hilary Duff's hand off the previous month's cover, flip it around, and give it a virtual manicure.

Conclusion: Mischa Barton got Frankenstein-ed — she appeared on the cover of a glossy with national distribution sporting Hilary Duff's hand.

Here, friends is the evidence:


Hilary Duff's hand, October 2004.

Hilary Duff's Hand on Mischa Barton's arm, November 2004. Kudos to the art department lackey who took the time to change the nail polish!

You'd think that having veins in your hand meant you were, you know, alive. But no. Veins=old. And old=bad! Mischa Barton was 18 when the photograph was taken (and on a teen-friendly hit show called The O.C. — what a great message to send fans!). But since Hilary Duff was 17 that year, the younger hand won. Unfortunately, something seems weird about Hilary Duff's shoulder on the left there (click to enlarge main image) so, actually, no one wins.

Earlier: Photoshop Of Horrors Hall Of Shame, 2000-2009

[Beverly Hills, December 3. Image via INF]

• Rosie O'Donnell has confirmed the rumors that her five-year marriage to Kelli Carpenter is on the rocks. She said: "Kelli and I love each other very much and we are working on our issues..."

• Rosie continued, "Those are the only words I am ever going to say. Ever. And that is something that has been agreed upon by all parties. But everything's fine and everybody's good and we're still both raising them together. We will both continue to parent them and we're friendly and everything's all right." [Radar Online]
• Kelli Carpenter reportedly took their youngest child (who she gave birth to) and moved into their Manhattan condo a few months ago, while Rosie O'Donnell is staying in their Nyack, NY home with their three adopted children. Sources say Kelli initiated the split because she couldn't deal with Rosie's mood swings. [Radar Online]
• Randy Jackson says Michael Jackson's signature on his 2002 will must be forged because on the date the will was signed MJ was with Randy in New York protesting against Sony executive Tommy Mattola. According to Al Sharpton's rep, he was also at the protest and can confirm that MJ was in New York, not signing the will in L.A. [TMZ]
• A literary agent is shopping a book containing Michael Jackson's "private writings" and drawings. [Crains New York]
• Jon Gosselin is demanding $12,000 an hour to guest-host a Florida radio show. He was offered first class plane tickets and a luxury hotel room but Jon's rep said he should also be paid because, "[Jon's] name and appearance on your show will instantly draw press ... and will be a high point for the show." The rep described Gosselin as "quite funny, sharp witted and interesting." O-rly? [TMZ]
• The lawyer who sponsored attorney Mark Heller's petition to represent Jon Gosselin in Pennsylvania has made a motion to formally withdraw his support, so it looks like Jon may need a new lawyer. [TMZ]
• Carrie Prejean has responded to Miss California USA's lawsuit against her by releasing this statement through her lawyer: "They have proven, once again, that they will use whatever scurrilous accusations they can dredge up – or invent – to try and tarnish Carrie's reputation and her good name. It is both appalling and pathetic to see K2 and their friends in Hollywood try to destroy this young woman simply for standing up for her beliefs." [Radar Online]
• Roman Polanski's lawyers need to get their story straight. One says there's "no change in strategy" and Polanski will "continue to fight extradition." Another says he may voluntarily surrender to U.S. authorities. [AP]
• Joel Madden wrote on his blog: "I keep getting emails from old friends and family asking about a wedding. NO we didn't get married." So Star's new cover story about Joel and Nicole Richie being married by a Rev. Moon over the internet isn't true? [Perez Hilton]
• Regarding Bronson Pinchot's accusations that as a young man Tom Cruise constantly made homophobic comments, his publicist said, "Obviously this is so far removed from who Tom Cruise is as a person, this must have been said in jest." It's a pretty clever statement, considering it's unclear whether he means Cruise or Pinchot was joking. [N.Y. Magazine]
• Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel went to see Where the Wild Things Are in Vancouver, where she's shooting a movie. Justin put his feet up on the seat in front of him and his head on Jess's shoulder. "They laughed a lot," said an eyewitness. "They seem so happy to be back together, to have worked things out." [Ok]
• The status of Usher's marriage to Tameka Foster Raymond has been changed to "disposed," which usually means it's been finalized. [TMZ]
• Amy Ryan gave birth to Georgia Gracie Slovin on October 15, her first child with her fiance, comedy writer Eric Slovin. [UPI]
• A Run-DMC musical is in the works. "Their work speaks to everybody," says producer Paula Wagner, "and the story of their rise to fame is innately theatrical." [N.Y.T.]
• Susan Sarandon has won the Stockholm film festival's lifetime achievement award for her "reflection, seduction and rebellion" in playing many "multifaceted female characters." [USA Today]
• Reggie Miller has obtained a restraining order against Alexander Von Furstenberg, who threatened to "beat him down" because he thinks Reggie hit on his fiancée Ali Kay. [Radar Online]
• Mayumi Heene's former client, Sunda Croonquist, says the family was homeless. They were staying in their work studio and "were living in conditions that were not acceptable", "slept on the floor or couches," and didn't have a bathroom. [Radar Online]
• Hulk Hogan says he considered suicide after Linda Hogan left him but Laila Ali, his Gladiators co-star, saved his life. He explained he took Xanax with rum and had his hand on the trigger of a gun when Ali called him after noticing he looked distracted at work. [CNN]
• Patricia Field called Sex and the City 2: Electric Boogaloo "Star Wars for women all over the world." Um, no. [People]
• Madonna has give Glee the rights to her catalogue and there's an all-Madonna episode in the works. [Entertainment Weekly]
• David Boreanaz was cheating on his wife of eight years, Jaime Bergman, while she was pregnant with their second child this spring. [Star]
• Emma Thompson, who attended the graduation of her adopted son Tindyebwa Agaba from the University of Exeter in July, will return to the school next month to lead talks on race relations. She said, "Exeter is very white and middle class and it needs to be cracked open a bit. I shall be there with my son, Tindy, who is from Rwanda. He had some unpleasant experiences at Exeter, but also some good ones. That's what's great, that the university has reacted with great oomph. They see we do need to open our eyes and doors and see what's been going on with people. I've been very impressed with that and I'll be there for three or four days." [Telegraph]
• The National Organization for Women sent a letter to David Letterman's producing partner Rob Burnett criticizing Dave for creating a "toxic environment" for the women he works with. Burnett defended Letterman, saying many women hold positions of power at their production company, no one has ever accused him of sexual harassment, and the scandal "did not stem from a complaint from anyone on our staff, but rather from an alleged attempt to commit a crime" against Letterman [Extra]
• Whitney Houston is selling her New Jersey home, which was featured on Being Bobby Brown for $2.5 million. There are pictures of the house here: [Real Estalker]
• "There are no childhoods any more," Smokey Robinson. "Our kids are indoctrinated from the time they're two years old with the news, the computer, advertising, every single, solitary thing. Our kids are brilliant – they're not stupid. This stuff is touching them. It's taking their childhood. They got too much information too fast." [The Telegraph]
• Alexa Chung says the biggest difference between New York and London is, "The rules in America are very oppressive. There are so many rules that people love to stick by. Like ID'ing you all the time, not letting you bringing a coffee into this venue (laughs). People are just sticklers for rules and they don't let you sneak a sneaky one. Like smoking cigarettes… It seems quite regimented." [Fashion Informer]
• "I equate fame with being a blue alien," says Juliette Lewis. "Some people are like [animated whisper], 'Look at the blue alien, she's so cute!' and other people are like [disgusted sneer], 'Oh my God, don't talk to the blue alien!' And, however they treat you, at the end of the day you're still a blue alien." [The Telegraph]
• Kim Kardashian, who recently turned 29, says, "I'm not going to lie, I woke up this morning feeling a little old! It's my last year in my 20s." [People]
• Kim Kardashian will guest judge tonight's episode of America's Next Top Model. She says, "I'm just a big fan of the show and I adore Tyra... I was so excited to give these girls advice and make a difference for their careers." [People]
• Mischa Barton says, "We have paint parties at my house, and everyone comes over and paints on blank canvases, and just does things for fun," she told us. "My kind of art has always been film. That's my primary interest, and everything else is just a hobby." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Michael Buble, who used to sleep with his bible every night praying that God would make him a singer, says, "As I get older I have a different concept of what God is to me and - it's not that I'm into organized religion - the truth is that I don't know. I'm sorry if that offends people out there, but I'm just being honest, I don't know. So instead of making it about a certain God, I have a relationship with that one thing. The universe. God. You can call it Jesus, you can call it Jehovah. You can call it whatever you want. Buddha if you want. Whatever. When I was a kid I definitely put it out there to the universe and to my God and I prayed that it would happen and it's obvious that it worked." [AP]
• Snoop Dogg says he referenced True Blood in "Gangsta Luv" because, "You know I'm down with it... I love that show. I wish I could be on it. I'd be a hell of a vampire, don't you think? So what's happenin'? True Blood, get at me - Snoop Dogg wants to be a vampire." [MTV]

• Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise were surprise guests at a "massive" Scientology party in England last week.

Four thousand other Scientologists — including John Travolta and Kelly Preston — were part of a "rapturous, fist-pumping crowd." It was the 25th anniversary of the International Association of Scientologists. Fun? Oh, also: There were protesters outside, and Tom said: "They're squirrels. Stuck in an electronic incident. It makes me so angry!" Wait, what? [Us Magazine]

• Speaking of Travolta: The extortion case has gone to the jury. [TMZ]
• This could be amazing: Ridley Scott is in talks with Angelina Jolie to play a femme fatale role in Gucci — a drama about murder and decadence in the Gucci fashion dynasty. In 1995, right before he was about to reestablish the brand by debuting Tom Ford's line, Maurizio, the grandson of founder Guccio Gucci, was gunned down in Milan. [Variety]
• I'm sure you'll find this simply shocking, but Gerard Butler has had a threesome in the past year. [The Sun]
• What's this? Renée Zellweger says she hasn't signed on for a third Bridget Jones flick?!?! "I get asked every single day, and I don't know anything," she says. "It's a rumor." [E!, Us]
• Halle Berry's daughter Nahla is learning to play golf. No, really: daddy Gabirel Aubry says: "She's learning to play golf. She has a little hole in the backyard." [People]
• Rumpus, a Great Dane who starred in three Lady Gaga music videos, was found dead after a hike in Los Angeles. [TMZ]
• Colin Farrell has a newborn son, his second child. [Independent]
• Heidi Montag didn't go to her sister Holly Montag's birthday party because no one was paying her an appearance fee. [Fox News]
• Poor Dave Chappelle was trying to set the Laugh Factory's endurance record for continuous stand up comedy, but five hours into his routine, he walked away to go to the bathroom. Disqualified! [USA Today]
• Boo. Mark Ronson will never work with Lily Allen again. Boo. [The Sun]
• A series of emails reveal that the Swiss Federal Office of Justice faxed the U.S. Office of International Affairs letting the Americans know about Roman Polanski's planned appearance in Zurich and asking if the US would be submitting a request for Polanski's arrest. [CBS News]
• Three New York prison officials have quit their jobs following a scandal involving rapper Foxy Brown; they reportedly let her do a photo shoot to promote her new album, despite the fact that she was behind bars. Investigators will try to reveal if she received preferential treatment. You think? [Contact Music]
• Gossip Girl paychecks: Blowing in the wind. [Page Six]
• Alec Baldwin's got jokes! Speaking at the Elle Women In Hollywood event, he said: "I want to assure you that I didn't steal this role from a more qualified woman. There was an audition process. The audition required me to move a couch, fall asleep in front of the TV, and open a particularly stubborn jar of pickles." And! ""If Tom Cruise would simply lower his quote by a mere $29 million, my salary would not make a difference. My annual salary is the budget for Altoids on one of Tom's movies." And! Renée Zellweger "is so tiny, but she's got a big voice. I've been to parties with her and you can hear her voice anywhere, but you can't understand a word she says." More at the link. [People]
• Mischa Barton is trying to trademark her name in Australia, but there's already a company called Mischa Accessories. What to do?!?! [News.com.au]
• Victoria Beckham will be a guest judge on So You Think You Can Dance — in the UK. Sorry 'Mericans. [Daily Mail]
• Viewers submitted almost 9,000 questions for Kate Gosselin to answer during her TLC one-hour special on Monday. Here's one more: When will you go away? [People]
• More on this in Midweek Madness, but Life & Style is proclaiming its latest issue (out today) a "Special Gosselin-Free Issue." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Guy Ritchie is a distant relative of King Edward 1, and when you look at a side by side comparison, there's a resemblance! The nose? And the jaw? [Daily Mail]
• Rob Burnett, executive producer of The Late Show with David Letterman, has replied to NOW, who called the workplace a "toxic environment." Burnett's letter reads: "As an employee of David Letterman's since 1985, I have personally found the work environment on his shows to be fair, professional and entirely merit-based at all times." He also points out that 58% of the Late Show staff are women. [LA Times]
• A fan approached Freida Pinto in London; Freida accidentally bumped into her; the woman stumbled and fell in front of a car; Freida rushed to make sure the woman was okay; everyone was fine and it was a happy ending caught on camera. [This Is London]
• Take a deep breath and relax: Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom's prenup is a done deal. [TMZ]
• OMG! Dancing With The Stars flu outbreak! Run for the hills! [People]
• Salman Rushdie is pissed that his ex-girlfriend said he was still obsessed with his ex-wife, Padma Lakshmi. He says: "I long ago turned the page and moved on." [Page Six]
• Glenn Beck travels with an armed guard. Even when he goes to the bathroom. [Page Six]
• "A strip club worker accused of beating to death the ex-fiance of a Real Housewives of Atlanta cast member has been freed on bond." [CBS News]
• At the link: James Gandolfini, Elaine Stritch and fat jokes. [Page Six]
• Blind items! "Which married music mogul is said to have impregnated an unmarried woman who works for his label in marketing? She's on maternity leave while he's mulling options. Which still gorgeous ex-supermodel doesn't use her own skin-care line, which she hawks on TV? She secretly uses Somme Institute's MDT5 regimen instead. Which son of a rock icon used his name to score six free tickets to a Broadway show, but then never showed up?" [Page Six]
• "The trouble is, before, I felt married to two people — Pete and our management." — Whatshername. [Daily Mail]
• "I wish to make it perfectly clear for the record that my manager, Claire Powell, who I have known for the past 16 years, is my manager and a personal friend. She has never betrayed me or done anything other than support me, which is more than can be said for my ex wife." — Whatshisname. [The Sun]
• "There were times when I thought that a whole bottle of pills would go down easy… Then I noticed the gun in my hand. I was careless with it… I kept my finger pressed right to that trigger … and if I moved that finger an inch in the right direction… I would have blown my brains out." — Hulk Hogan writes about his suicidal thoughts after his divorce in his new book. [Page Six, Gatecrasher]
• "I am an atheist. I have a very different take on who God is. Man invented God because he needed him. God is us." — 87-year-old Carl Reiner, who has two new books out. The story at the link details his fascinating life from a high schooler in New York to working in the garment industry to becoming a writer/director. [LA Times]
• "I know what they're eating and I know what they're doing. Their friends' parents understand their vegetarian and no-TV needs. I give them age-appropriate messages. It's just like most parents don't allow alcohol or cigarettes. I tell them that everyone does things differently and that's OK. It's very important to us to raise nonjudgmental children who don't go finger-wagging. When they're driving themselves around, they're going to make their own decisions, but fast food isn't something I'm gonna facilitate. Still, at some point they"re going to make their own decisions. You give your children wings so they can fly." — Mayim Bialik on raising her kids holistically and via "green mothering." [HuffPo]
• "I've offered to come on Saturday Night Live because I thought I would help them get the ratings. Because clearly that humor that they had when they first had Chevy Chase, Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi ... has gone (with) this (current) cast of characters. I thought I would show some benevolence as governor and help them out a little bit." — Governor David Paterson, who is often mocked on SNL for being blind. [MSNBC Scoop]
• "I've written two autobiographies and posed for Playboy. I think I've pretty much been out there. But this is definitely the most exposed I've ever been." — Carnie Wilson on her hew reality series, Carnie Wilson: Unstapled, in which viewers will see her trying to take off about 50 pounds of "baby weight." [AP]
• "We've had a real good collaboration. Crucially, she approved me as director, and she didn't have to. We had some discussions that were very important — my convincing her that I didn't want to take her baby and run away with it, or tell a story that was counter to the spirit of what she was trying to tell. I see myself, in the last few movies I've done, as adapting literary properties into film, so that's how I treated this one. We got along like a house on fire." — Chris Weitz, who's directing New Moon, kept in contact with Twilight series author Stephenie Meyer. [Hollywood Reporter]
• "I like kissing women sometimes. Women are pretty. It doesn't mean I'm necessarily sleeping with them." — Adam "Glambert" Lambert, to Details. You saw the pix, right? [Page Six]
• "He was eating chips and dip and he was laughing so hard, he started choking. I thought I'd killed Tony Romo. Here it would be like killing David Beckham or Pele, it was a scary moment."— Jeremy Piven told a deadly joke. [Mirror]
• "We have found the quality of life so much more enriching and fulfilling. The civility, the culture, the people and its beauty have reawakened me and have smoothed out some of my bleak and jagged views about people and life." — Lisa Marie Presley, who had twins last year, has left L.A. for London. [Contact Music]
• "[Quitting the show] was a complete anomaly in my life and my career. I've never missed out on anything. I relished the opportunity to be on Broadway… It's the holy grail for people like me. But I was incredibly ill. The levels of mercury I had, they had no reference for them. I had to be retested three times. Sometimes when you work without stopping, your body gives in. That is what happened. I've done more movies than years I've been alive. All I've done is work… I arrived in Los Angeles in my early 20s and I've been pounding the pavement ever since. But it wasn't until Entourage that my work became accessible to so many people. If there's one thing I'm prepared for, it's rejection." — Jeremy Piven. [Guardian]
• "Sitting on an island smoking my first joint." — Tyler Perry, when asked where he would like to be in 10 years. [Page Six]
• "I told them, don't ask me to grow out my hair or lose any weight. I want to represent real women who have curves." — Amber Rose on signing with Ford Models. She did, however, agree not to get any more tattoos. [LA Times]

• Penelope Cruz, who is rumored to be engaged to Javier Bardem, showed up to the premiere of Pedro Almódovar's Broken Embraces in New York on Sunday with a knuckle-sized sapphire surrounded by small diamonds on her ring finger. [People]

• Is Madonna trying to get into a Pedro Almodóvar film? They were spotted having dinner together. [N.Y. Magazine]
• Al Pacino says, "At 20, I lived in Sicily by selling the only asset I had - my body. An older woman traded food and housing in return for sex. I woke mornings not really loving myself." [Daily Express]
• A source close to Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, and Jennifer Aniston insists, "Angelina really couldn't care less," about their "feud". "And Jennifer really has moved on. I promise you this." [E!]
• Michael Lohan visited Jon Gosselin at his Pennslyvania home today and played with Jon's kids. [TMZ]
• Jon Gosselin's lawyer, Mark Heller, who has been suspended by the New York State Bar, asked lawyer Michael Marino to sponsor him so he could get permission to represent Jon in Pennsylvania. Marino has withdrawn his sponsorship and says he only agreed at first because the Gosselins, "Didn't mean anything to me. I thought it was some simple divorce case where some lawyer wanted to be introduced to the court... I don't watch that kind of junk on TV. It was so insignificant to me." [TMZ]
• Jon and Kate Gosselin will head to court tomorrow to meet with an arbitrator to work out their money dispute. [People]
• Ugh. The cover of Star last week declared that Tori Spelling only weighs 95 lbs so she Tweeted: "come 2 my house&weigh me Star! I'm 107lbs." Now the mag writes: "As for Tori's challenge to come to her house and weigh her, we've accepted it - twice! - and we're waiting to hear back from her to name the time/date." [Star]
• Paula Anka says that "This Is It" is a rip off of a song he wrote and recorded with Michael Jackson in 1983. He claims that MJ stole the tapes and his vocal track is used in "This Is It." Anka gave his song to Safire, who recorded it in 1990. You can compare at them here: [TMZ]
• Mischa Barton says she's looking to get back to work now that The Beautiful Life has been cancelled. "There's a bunch of projects I always wanted to make, so I'm going back to thinking about things again," she said. "I just started looking at films." [Access Hollywood]
• Roman Polanski's lawyer said, "The filmmaker is very touched by the support he has received... He also knows that some of it is counter-productive." [AFP]
• Taping of the Real Housewives of Atlanta reunion special has been postponed to give the cast time to deal with the death of Kandi Burruss' former fiancé, Ashley "A.J." Jewell. [CNN]
• Just so you know, Bruce Jenner thinks President Obama did "absolutely nothing" to deserve his Nobel Prize. He said this while pumping gas. [TMZ]
• Courtney Love has left Twitter, but, unlike Miley Cyrus she has a good reason. She is being sued by fashion designer Dawn Simorangkir for her defamatory Tweets. [Perez Hilton]
• Bruce Vilanch's assistant, Seth Apper, has been arrested for selling coke. [Village Voice]
• Why won't people leave Jessica Simpson alone? She Tweets: "People have been contacting my family and friends saying that Daisy has been found. Untrue. People are so cruel. Please respect her memory." [People]
• Orlando Bloom has been named UNICEF's Goodwill Ambassador. He plans to focus on advocating for needy children. [AP]
• Bill Hader's wife Maggie Carey gave birth to their first child, Hannah Kathryn Hader, on October 6. [People]
• Can the ridiculously dapper Jon Hamm make David Letterman seem a little less sleazy? Check out this video to find out: [ONTD]
• Shauna Sand is fighting Vivid Entertainment because the porn company plans to distribute a sex tape featuring Sand and her boyfriend. She says: "Yes I did make a sex tape with my boyfriend earlier this year. In fact I've made several sex tapes, but I certainly didn't sign off on this and Vivid has no right to put it out. I am trying to get a hold of my attorney now." [TMZ]
• Lorenzo Lamas screamed at Shauna Sand, the mother of his three young daughters, when he learned of the sex tape. She was worried he would sue for full custody, but to prove to her that he wouldn't he wrote the following on a piece of paper: I, Lorenzo Lamas, will not seek custody of my minor children with Shauna Sand. Even in the event of a release of a sex tape with her and her boyfriend." [TMZ]
• In her memoir The Trump Card, Playing To Win In Work And Life, Ivanka Trump writes: "My parents have both led nontraditional lifestyle – but they have extremely traditional relationships with their children... They might have taken me to boxing matches or trips around the word but at the end of the day they were always my parents, not my best friends." [People]
• Sharon Stone hasn't been acting that much and she's been filling her free time with gardening. She says: "What I am finding is that when you start to really clear old, dead things and really take that time to take away the old stuff and organize a garden and clear out and get in the dirt and weed things out and then see the new stuff that's coming up and move things around, this time that you take that actually takes some labor and is meditative and organized with nature, you can get yourself in a harmonious place." [N.Y. Magazine]
• "I'm a single mother with no child support. I have to work. I also happen to love what I do and think it's a good example for kids to see their mother working. My son always says to me, 'Mommy, why do you have to go to work?' and I tell him, 'I have to be able to buy the toys.' He totally gets it." — Kelly Rutherford [L.A. Times]

• Michael and Dina Lohan will work together on getting Lindsay Lohan off of pills. Says Michael Lohan. [Radar Online]

• Papa Lohan says of Lindsay: "Her problem is prescription drug use. I've seen pictures of her in Paris, and she looks totally out of it. There are morons hanging around her, and they have their hands on my daughter." [Gatecrasher]
• But! Dina Lohan says: "I don't go — like my ex — on national television and make things up. He's estranged from Lindsay; he doesn't know what's going on in her life. Michael doesn't talk to her. "I've had full custody of all my children for the last 10 years. He has been incarcerated for some of that time, so whatever is going on in Lindsay's personal life is our business. And for him getting paid to say things about her when he's five months behind in child support is wrong." Oh, and re: Ungaro, Dina sniffs: "The critics can say whatever they want, but Lindsay is a genius." [Page Six]
• "Leave Lindsay alone. Let her be a real 23-year-old. Let her grow, and let her artistic abilities flourish. Stop judging the Britneys and the Lindsays. They are very creative girls, and that is a gift from a higher power of God."— Dina Lohan. [Page Six]
• Dr. Conrad Murray, Michael Jackson's personal physician, may face arrest — and could lose his medical license — after missing a late child support hearing. [NY Post]
• "The CBS producer accused of blackmailing David Letterman was convinced the comic king bedded 'six or seven' female staffers, a pal of the newsman said Thursday." [NY Daily News]
• A chimpanzee was supposed to be a guest judge on Dancing With The Stars on Tuesday, but PETA complained. This is not a joke. [NY Post]
• Nicole Kidman has teamed up with Omega watches — she signed watch boxes to benefit the United Nations Development Fund for Women. Fifty percent of the proceeds of the watch sales will go to UNIFEM. [WWD]
• Jon Gosselin didn't leave the twins' birthday party at 6pm — he stayed to put his kids to bed. And he was cordial to Kate. But did not spend the night. [TMZ, People]
• You know how Jon Gosselin brought a misspelled birthday cake (it's "Mady", not "Maddy") to his kids' birthday party? Well it was sort of an insult to Kate, who was making a cake from scratch. [BBC News]
• Mischa Barton was spotted buying rounds of shots for Ryan Ross — formerly of Panic At The Disco; currently in Young Veins. [Gatecrasher]
• Mischa Barton was spotted getting out a cab in front of a bar, yelling "I need a drink!" Been there. [Page Six]
• Uh-oh, Nicolas Cage owes over six million dollars in unpaid taxes. Uncle Sam doesn't like that. [TMZ]
• Dr. Phil is denying that he forced a woman to stare at a naked man and grabbed her breast. [TMZ]
• Hilary Swank walks around naked in front of her boyfriend's son. "You wonder at what age you should stop walking around nude," she admits. "But he doesn't look twice. He doesn't think about it yet." Really? He's 6 years old. [Gatecrasher via Marie Claire]
• Khloe Kardashian will now be known as Khloe Kardashian Odom. Adjust accordingly. [Page Six]
• Robin Williams will do his stand up act, Weapons Of Self Destruction, in NYC in November, his first show since having heart surgery. [NY Daily News]
• LOL: Woody Harrelson gets his zombie punchlines from Paul McCartney. [NY Post]
• Mya's dress split at a party; she used safety pins and staples to cobble it back together. Stars are just like us! [Page Six]
• "The husband of Danielle Staub from "Real Housewives of New Jersey" claims she strait up lied when she called him a rapist and a dog murderer ... and now he's suing her for defamation." [TMZ]
• At the link is a recap and insider report and blow-by-blow account of Jeremy Piven's Broadway drama/Speed-the-Plow meltdown. [NY Times]
• Kylie Minogue will do a residency in Vegas? Makes total sense. [Mirror]
• Speaking of Kylie: her ex-boyfriend Olivier Martinez has accepted undisclosed libel damages over a claim that he had cheated on her during their long-term relationship. The Sun apparently makes stuff up. [The Star]
• Breaking: Audrina Patridge is single and happy. [People]
• Kristen Bell will star as Christina Aguilera's rival in Burlesque, a musical drama about "a small-town girl with a big-town voice who finds love and success in a neo-burlesque club." You guys, Cher plays the club owner. CHER. [Hollywood Reporter]
• On the Wanda Sykes HBO special: "She is… the funniest person in America… Sykes gets the crowd laughing early and keeps them laughing to the end, with no significant down time and no cheap tricks… [It] all builds to a prolonged, brilliant segment on being gay and black that puts a racial spin on every coming-out cliché- making us see both with new eyes." [USA Today]
• "Filmmaker Steven Spielberg, long recognized for his artistic achievements, was honored with the Liberty Medal on Thursday for his compassion and humanitarian work." [AP]
• Parker Posey has joined the cast of Highland Park, a dark comedy with Danny Glover. The film focuses on the high school faculty in a struggling community. In the story, a teacher wins the lottery and uses the cash to restore the local library; the film is actually attempting to help reopen a real library in Detroit. [Hollywood Reporter]
• "Thursday's episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta took a dark turn. Following the news of the death of Anthony "AJ" Jewel outside his Atlanta strip club last week, viewers watched his then-fiancée, Housewife Kandi Burruss, waver about the future of their relationship - awkwardly unaware, as the cameras rolled, that the relationship had no future." [People]
• Isaiah Washington: Still looking for jobs. Sources say it's not because of the Grey's fallout, but because he is difficult to work with. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Gloria Estefan bought 2,000 tickets for her concert in Puerto Rico this weekend and will distribute them via raffle among 17,000 recently laid-off government workers. [AP]
• Gladys Knight is embarking on a farewell tour? Is she taking a midnight train? [Independent]
• "I'm in 'Gay Paris' — I swear as an Englishman that by the time I leave tomorrow it'll be known as 'Hetero Paris.' Or at least Bi Paris." — Russell Brand. [NY Daily News]
• "I was always thinking 'how am I going to keep my old chap in my pants?' But Ayda and me are very loved up – sprogs on the way and all that business. I don't know what will go on down the road, but I don't want to do anything to fuck it up or do anything to upset her." — Robbie Williams on gf Ayda Field. [Telegraph]
• "My dad went into a rant. Farrah came flying at him to defend herself, he blocked her and, in the process, broke her arm. They spun the truth to protect Ryan (but) I was there, I saw it happen." — Griffin O'Neal says his father Ryan O'Neal cheated on Farrah Fawcett and was abusive. [Daily Express]
• "It's obviously very strange, a little mad. Especially the [Audrey] Hepburn comparisons. I mean, that's such a lovely thing to say about the film, and I see it in the Paris montage. But you know, I didn't think about the end product much when I was making it. I just thought, what fun! There's Emma Thompson! I had to fight for this part; I auditioned three times and must have called my agent every day for two months afterwards. I knew it was a special gang going in, but I just thought…oh, I have to play Jenny. Her journey is enormous." — Carey Mulligan on all the buzz her performance in new film An Education is getting, in which she plays "a fiercely intelligent teenage girl living in barely pre-Beatles London." [The Daily Beast]
• "It's fucking weird. I'll be the first to admit that New York is one of the greatest cities in the world. But what you see on screen is not the life we really lead." — Gossip Girl's Penn Badgley, who likes taco stands, not fancy restaurants. [BlackBook]
• "The only expert thing I know about a relationship is that I don't know anything. I think every time I think I know something, obviously you then learn that you don't know anything, but I do know this to be true: I know that men marry women hoping that they will not change, and women marry men hoping that they will change, and inevitably, everyone's disappointed." — Vince Vaughn. [Independent]
• "Younger guys are generally more adventurous, not set in their ways. I don't like guys my age because they are normally either married or divorced and grumpy, fat and balding." — Madonna. [Daily Express]

[New York, October 5. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[New York, October 3. Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

• Late last night, TMZ published a report claiming that Maya Angelou had been taken to the hospital. However, a CNN news editor,Saeed Ahmed, posted on his Twitter page that Angelou's literary agent says the hospital rumors are false. [DetroitFreePress]

• A paparazzi cameraman has filed a police report against Sean Penn, after Penn kicked and hit the cameraman Friday afternoon. [TMZ]
• Video is now available of Lindsay Lohan being booed in Singapore last month. Hopefully things go a bit better for her today at her Ungaro runway debut in Paris. [ONTD]
• "I'm young. I know what it's like. Lots of girls want to dress like me," Lohan says of her advising role at Ungaro, "I always like to ask my friends when I buy stuff, or my sister Aliana who's with me in Paris. I'm doing the same thing here, giving my perspective." [Telegraph]
• Simon Cowell celebrated his 50th birthday last night by throwing a birthday party that reportedly cost 1.6 million dollars. [Radar]
• If you ever meet Kristen Stewart, you might want to avoid asking her about her role as Bella Swan: "I feel so boring because Twilight is literally how every conversation I have these days begins," she says. [People]
• Michael Bay posted a note on his website about the production of Transformers 3 that included a PS stating, "Megan Fox, welcome back." [Radar]
• "Oh, girl. People hated me for that. I didn't think it was a big deal until I realized I was the second most Googled person in the country. It was a brain fart! It was my second or third day on 'The View,' and I just got nervous. Barbara asked me if it was round or flat and I said, 'I don't know, I'm just trying to take care of my kid.'When the show was over Barbara came over and said 'Dear, the Earth is round,' and I said, 'Barbara, I know that!'"-Sherri Shepherd [LATimes]
• John Cleese is planning on paying for his divorce by starring in a one-man show appropriately titled the "How To Finance Your Divorce Tour." [Telegraph]
• Clive Owen makes an effort to balance his movie making schedule with his family life: "It's about making sure if I'm away for a long period doing a movie that I take some downtime. I do that now. I make sure I never do anything too close together so that I'm never away from the kids too much." [WashingtonPost]
• Alexsandra Wright, who is suing Beyonce's father, Matthew Knowles, claiming that he is the father of her child, had a role on an episode of Scrubs in 2001. [TMZ]
• When asked about her engagement to John Krasinski, Emily Blunt deadpanned: "All I can say is that there were flutes playing in the background, butterflies, there were angels showering us with rainbow drops." [MTV]
• "Drew had me in mind, I guess, for this role. She called me, and she's got a gift for enthusiasm when she's on fire about something. Then I read the script, and I was really excited. And then I got on some skates and had to do an audition because I lied - you know, like all good actors do, we lie - that I could skate."- Juliette Lewis on her role in Whip It! [EW]
• More details are coming out about the man accused of attempting to blackmail David Letterman; neighbors and colleagues say that Robert Halderman "must have snapped," as Halderman's actions seem completely out of character. "I am surprised, mystified and stunned to hear these allegations against Halderman," says Dan Rather, who worked with Halderman, "They are almost impossible to believe. He was always a solid character, steady, reliable, and a good, swift writer." [People]
• Joe Simpson says his daughter, Jessica Simpson is learning how to handle the criticism aimed at her body by working on her new show, "She's always scrutinized by the world and [it's great] to watch her go to other countries and see women talk about what is beautiful there. We were just in Uganda, and a beauty ambassador [there] knew Jessica's total story about her weight and blah, blah, blah. [She said] to Jessica that it's about who you are inside, which is the message of our show." [USWeekly]
• Jermaine Jackson says that the series of tribute concerts he's planned in honor of his brother, Michael, are not meant to make money off of Michael's death: "That is the most ridiculous thing ever. It is not about cashing in on what has happened. It is responsibility on all of our parts as brothers and sisters to keep his legacy alive." [ShowbizSpy]
• Olivia Newton-John says she still has her hot pants from the set of Grease: "I can still wear them," she says, "But they're locked away in a cupboard. I only bring them out for special occasions. My husband loves them." [TheSun]
• Blind Item #1: Which reality show star refused to put a house keeper on the books, worked her like a slave and paid her spottily in cash with no regard to her Social Secu rity or her husband, who was being treated for cancer? [PageSix]
• Blind Item #2: Which pouty actress was recently spotted acting like a complete lush? She "got drunk and then threw herself all over a clubowner," according to our spies. [PageSix]
• Blind Item #3: Which soon-to-be married heartthrob forced his wedding guests to sign confidentiality agreements before they got their wedding invitations? [PageSix]
• "My family keep me grounded. I still take the subway and do my own laundry. Well, not all of the time, but I'm not a bitch. I enjoy having a normal life."-Mischa Barton [Mirror]
• "I love that we managed an addition to the narrative of the show … There are some definite new elements to the story of these four people that are now part of the whole story … I thought this would be more of a stunt-type thing, but I feel like this is really part of the series now. I would call this a member in good standing with all the other episodes."-Jerry Seinfeld, on tonight's Seinfeld reunion on Curb Your Enthusiasm. [EW]
• "I'm a disaster in the kitchen! You know what my secret is for preparing the perfect meal for friends when I invite them over? It's ordering from the best restaurants and having the food delivered."-Beyoncé [ShowbizSpy]

• Conan O'Brien landed in the hospital yesterday due to an injury sustained during a Tonight Show stunt. A source says O'Brien was "running down a flight of stairs when he slipped and banged his head, possibly sustaining a concussion." [E!]

• Though the network has not yet released any details about Conan's condition or if he's been released from the hospital, they did release a statement allegedly made by O'Brien himself: ""Last thing I remember I was enjoying the play with Mrs. Lincoln and the next thing I knew I was in bed being served cookies and juice." [NYTimes]
• Conan was also cracking jokes during his ambulance ride to the hospital. Is it wrong that I hope he made a Nomi Malone/Showgirls reference regarding Jay Leno and the flight of stairs? [TMZ]
• The rumors about Lindsay Lohan trashing a hotel room during a fight with Samantha Ronson are apparently untrue, as Lohan was in Texas, not New York, when the fight supposedly broke out. [PageSix]
• Meanwhile, producers of Celebrity Big Brother UK are trying to line up Lohan for the last season of the show. [TheSun]
• Seth Rogen's dream came true when he was asked to co-write and lend his voice to the first episode of the upcoming season of The Simpsons, where he'll spoof his own Green Hornet experience by playing a trainer assigned to whip Homer into shape for a big budget action film. "As a writer, it always just seemed like the Holy Grail," Rogen says, "I can die a happy man now." [AP]
• Randy Quaid and his wife allegedly have their hotel bill-hopping scheme "down to a science," according to a Santa Barbara County Sheriff, who notes that the couple have pulled similar stunts before. [TMZ]
• Miley Cyrus will reportedly be movin her hips like yeah in the Sex and the City sequel: "Miley sees this as a transition from teen stardom to more adult roles," says a source, "We're all wondering how long it will take Kim to have Miley knocking back Cosmos and ogling all the men. Seriously though, all the girls are excited to have Miley on board." I think it will take 5 years, source! Because she's only 16 years old like yeah, so it's a straight edge party on the set in the USA while the cameras are rolling, know what I'm sayin? [ShowbizSpy]
• Afeni Shakur has donated over 150 pieces of her son, Tupac's work to the Robert W. Woodruff Library at the Atlanta University Center. The collection includes handwritten notes, lyrics, and poetry. [AP]
• Mary-Louise Parker is dating musician Charlie Mars. He's 10 years younger than she is, so get ready for 6-8 months of stupid cougar references. [People]
• Ashton Kutcher's The Beautiful Life, starring Mischa Barton, has been canceled by the CW after only 2 episodes. Sadly, no one has canceled the similarly-titled Ace of Base song from my brain since I read this item earlier this morning. [THR]
• Catherine Zeta-Jones and husband Michael Douglas shared a birthday yesterday; she turned 40 and he turned 65. "'When you live in Los Angeles you can't go anywhere without being critiqued - on the fact that you have gained weight or that you have got spots on your face. That's not the life I want," Jones says, "Deciding to live in beautiful Bermuda was the healthiest thing Michael and I ever did. Now that I have kids, that's what my life is about." [DailyMail]
• "I've been afraid of the dark my whole life. If I go into my house at night and the lights have been turned off... I have to run from the door to the light switch to turn it on... I'm just afraid of what I can't see. I watch a lot of paranormal shows, like Ghost Hunters... and they freak me out." -Megan Fox [DailyExpress]
• Brett Ratner had to convince producers to allow an autobiographical sex scene in his short for New York, I Love You, wherein a character loses his virginity to "a paraplegic dangling from a tree." Ratner, who apparently lost his own virginity this way, says "When I sent the original script, which is autobiographical, the producers would not let me film it because, in the original ending, she (the girl) is a cripple, and they have sex as she's hanging from a tree in Central Park. Everyone was freaking out over my short, so I changed it to where she wasn't a cripple, but an actress pretending to be a cripple." [DailyExpress]
• Jay-Z says that he's thankful his mother, Gloria, set up a meeting between him and his estranged father, whose absence caused a great deal of "resentment and anger" in his life, as it allowed him to better understand his father's choices. [ShowbizSpy]
• Michael Jackson admitted in an interview to Rabbi Shmuley Boteach that he was terrified of growing old and that he felt Madonna was jealous of him: "'I think she was in love with me and I was not in love with her." [DailyMail]
• Boteach also says that Jackson had "lost the will to live" and was embarrassed about his appearance, noting that he felt he looked like a "lizard." [Reuters]
• "I just hit 40, so what more can I say? I mean, the fact that I'm 40 is a miracle. I'm on the other side now."- Christian Slater [ShowbizSpy]
• J.K. Rowling has opened a Twitter account. Rita Skeeter has already sent her 82930283 direct messages, asking for scoops. [EW]
• And now for my favorite news ever: Snoop Dogg is a big fan of the 90s British sitcom Keeping Up Appearances: ""They still run the show on BBC America so I think Mrs Bucket must have some sort of cult following in the US. I still watch the show to this day and it makes me laugh so hard. She has to be one of the funniest people on TV." [TheSun]

[New York, September 23. Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

• Courtney Love "went nuts" when a guest at a party opened an unlocked bathroom and saw her on the toilet with her skirt around her ankles.

Apparently she launched herself at the dude, and though people tried to calm her down, a security guy told the man: "It's best you get away as fast as possible." [Page Six]

• Backstage at the Emmys, Paramedics were called for Kristin Chenoweth, who complained of a migraine headache and then said she couldn't open her eyes. [Access Hollywood]
• More backstage Emmys drama: A fight between Maksim Chmerkovskiy and Karina Smirnoff got "kind of loud." Apparently they were "screaming at each other"after he said she took too long in hair and makeup. [E!]
• Mad Men and 30 Rock were big winners at the Emmys last night. [NY Daily News]
• Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs won the weekend box office; Jennifer Aniston's Love Happens came in fourth — one of her worst openings in years — and Jennifer's Body placed fifth. [Ny Daily News]
• "Mr. T's Chance of Meatballs character fits him to a T." [USA Today]
• Kate Gosselin taped her Mom Logic TV show pilot over the weekend, and even though guests Mel B and Christie Brinkley were nixed, a source says the taping "went extremely well" and "Kate did great." [Radar]
• Congrats! Zooey Deschanel married Death Cab For Cutie singer Ben Gibbard Saturday night near Seattle. [People]
• Did you know that Susan Sarandon has been a member of a Ping-Pong society for years? [NY Magazine]
• From a profile on Madonna: "Scented Christian Dior candles fill the air in a space so dimly lit, it seems both slightly theatrical and quasi-religious. A huge telephone with multiple extensions bears labels such as M study, M dressing room, M bathroom, Laundry, Music Room, Kitchen, Mews." And: "A lot of people are just really confused by me… They don't know what to think of me, so they try to compartmentalize me or diminish me. Maybe they just feel unsafe. But any time you have an overtly emotional or irrational, negative reaction to something, you're fearing something that it's bringing up in you." [Times Of London]
• Paula Abdul almost refused to co-present with Kathy Griffin at the VH1 Divas concert because of all the insulting jokes Kathy had made. [Gatecrasher]
• Amy Winehouse was leaving a nightclub recently when a passerby shouted "Oi Amy, where's your crack pipe?" [The Sun]
• Heidi Klum and Seal can't decide on a name for the baby girl they are expecting. Seal says: "It has been the topic of debate for the last month. We can't quite figure it out. I'm a firm believer that she will pop out and will tell us what she wants to be called." [Mirror]
• Charlize Theron's nude scene in The Burning Plain — in which she smokes a cigarette while standing at a window in full view of passersby in Portland, OR — was shot at 6 a.m. to avoid paparazzi. [Page Six]
• Oprah had a block party in Chicago and paid more than $54,000 for city services. [Ny Post]
• Joy Behar would love to get Sarah Palin on her new show on HLN and talk to her about the "real America." "It's insulting to men like my father, who fought in World War II, whom she doesn't think are real Americans because we don't agree with her." Joy also says: "Look, it's not that I'm contentious; I'm uncompromising. I'm friendly, but I can't let things go unchallenged. And I intend to give my opinions quite profusely. I might even have to interrupt myself." [New York Magazine]
• New couple? Kid Cudi and Amanda Bynes??? [Gatecrasher]
• They're saying Mischa Barton's a mess in the morning and needs someone to "fix" her coffee, but who isn't and who doesn't? [Page Six]
• So what is up with that Taylor Momsen record contract that allows her singing on Gossip Girl and the "Runaways Project"? She's not in the Runaways movie! Was she was supposed to get Dakota Fanning's part? Or does she have a secret cameo? [TMZ]
• Beth Ditto has banned her girlfriend from touring with her: "[It's] not because I don't think she can handle it, but because that's my life. Say what you want about me. Say it to my face, say it behind my back, write it on the fucking bathroom mirror, I don't care. But do not talk about the people I love. I will lose my mind." [NME]
• An ambulance was called to David Hasselhoff's house yesterday; apparently his 17-year-old daughter, who was home with him, called her mother, saying that David was extremely drunk. A friend of Pamela's called 911. [TMZ, TMZ]
• January Jones, aka Mad Men's Betty Draper, has purchased a lovely home in the Los Feliz neighborhood of L.A., and you can see the pix at the link. [The Real Estalker]
• The Guinness World Records board has refused to let the White Stripes into their record book for playing a one-note concert, due to insufficient interest. Twelve hundred people showed up to a gig in Canada where Jack White played an E. [Mirror]
• Stephen Moyer on his engagement to Anna Paquin: "It was very intimate and quite surprising for her, I think, and we were by ourselves at dinner in Hawaii and...I surprised her. But it was something that surprised me probably more than it surprised her." He also says: "She is very funny and very frank and very direct and beautiful… She doesn't take any of my nonsense." [E!]
• David Arquette and Ben Harper have a clothing line called Propr, and Arquette says: ""We love the idea of chivalry and going in an old-school barber… There's a quality that's in the finer details, like they really thought it out a step further." More from "A Night Out" with the duo at the link. [NY Times]
• Ryan O'Neal visited Farrah Fawcett's grave after their son, Redmond, was ordered to leave jail and go to rehab for a year. [Daily Mail, USA Today]
• Nicole's sister Antonia Kidman is engaged to Singapore-based banker Craig Marran. [News.com.au]
• Terry Gilliam got Johnny Depp to tango for The Imaginarium Of Doctor Parnassus even though Johnny allegedly said "Men don't dance." [Mirror]
• Oy: Sacha Baron Cohen will play an Israeli tour guide on The Simpsons. [UPI]
• From a piece on John Malkovich's new film, Disgrace, set in post-apartheid South Africa: "[Malkovich's character] Lurie appears the virtual embodiment of white male arrogance, an English professor who views himself through the prism of Romantic poetry and who pursues an exploitive, obsessive affair with a much younger, mixed-race student. You can't say that he rapes her, but the issue of consent between an inexperienced young woman and a practiced seducer — one with direct power over her academic future — is complicated, to say the least." [Salon]
• Will Diddy switch record labels? [Page Six]
• Scott Weiland had a seizure on a plane while en route from Los Angeles to Florida, causing the plane to land in Dallas-Fort Worth; he is "doing great" now. [E!]
• Larry King hates frivolous lawsuits. [TMZ]
• John Travolta may be a witness at the trial for two people accused of trying to extort $25 million from him after his son died in the Bahamas. [AP]
• John Travolta says if he is called to testify, he will do so. [ET]
• Sources say John Travolta's testimony will be dramatic and emotional. [TMZ]
• Ozzy Osbourne's new memoir describes appearing on the MTV show The Osbournes as "terrifying" and like being "strapped to a rocket and being blasted through the stratosphere at warp factor ten." [Mirror]
• Leonard Cohen is recovering after collapsing on stage during a show in Spain; he reportedly had food poisoning. [UPI]
• James Blunt is accusing internet service providers of "handling stolen goods" by allowing file sharing and illegal downloads. [Telegraph]
• Anoushka Shankar, Ravi Shankar's daughter, had been the victim of a blackmail plot; an arrest has been made. [Independent]
• District 9 is not welcome in Nigeria. [NY Post]
• "Frustrated cops probing Jordan's claim to have been raped by a celebrity said yesterday they could do no more unless she co-operates." [The Sun]
• "You're not going to be successful. You're not going to be millionaires (with the exception of MAYBE Kris and Adam). No one will care about you. Those fans who've been asking for your autograph all tour long - 98 percent of them don't give a flying poo about you once next season of Idol starts. In other words, your days of being a star are over. But that's all right - so are mine… The music business, for the most part, will treat you like an outsider… You are just a game show contestant who still needs to prove why you should be here. Move to a music city. L.A., New York or Nashville Leave home and live WAY below your means." — Chris Sligh, former American Idol contestant, to other Idol singers, on his blog. [NY Post]
• "I was never in the high, high fashion industry. I was never one of those superskinny, supertall waif girls who goes from show to show. When you do more commercial things, your weight is allowed to fluctuate a bit. Not every inch counts. It's hard for the girls. How old are they? Fifteen, 16? Some girls are naturally thin and can eat whatever they want. When I was 15, 16, there was not one ounce of fat on me, but some other girls have to work hard to stay like that. But the rules are not made by the models. To be part of this, they have to be the size the designer wants them to be. I'm not that skinny, and I never was, but I can pretty much eat whatever I want." — Heidi Klum. [Page Six Magazine]
• "My dream was always to work in a candy store. It was because of my obsession with candy; I don't have it any more, now that my teeth are all rotten. I did go to a university for a year, as shocking as that might sound to people, and there was a candy shop that I used to go to all the time, an old-fashioned one where all the candy was in these big glass jars. I used to go in there and look at all the candy and think, ‘God, it would be really cool to work in here; I could have candy whenever I wanted.' So I did want the keys to the candy store, but I had different keys." —Madonna. [Times of London]
• "At first, I didn't know whether I'd be healthy enough to film a full season of an action-packed drama series. But soon I realized there was nothing I wanted to do more. We got in touch with the network to let them know about my diagnosis and I sent this message: 'Don't count me out. I can do this.' All I could think was: 'If I'm going out, I'd rather go out on a high note, doing quality work I believe in.'" — From Patrick Swayze's memoir, on doing The Beast with a cancer diagnosis. [Daily Mail]
• "We need to be the example of respect, of tolerance, and just how to be civil, can we do that? Even though I didn't win the crown that night I know that the Lord has so much of a bigger crown in heaven for me. I never asked to be thrown into politics… but you know what, I'm proud of the stance that I took and I'm glad that God upheld me for such a time as this." — Carrie Prejean. [NY Daily News]
• "Forget about playing Tony Blair. When I told her I was definitely playing vampire Aro in Twilight, she cried. She was so overwhelmed and annoyed that I muscled in on something that was hers. She's already told me she'll be my date for the premiere." — Michael Sheen's 10-year-old daughter, Lily is excited about his career for once. [Page Six]

• Emma Watson is doing a clothing line with ethical fashion company People Tree. We're still waiting for Mischa Barton's collection, Tree People. [Guardian]

• Rachel Zoe, on extra-curricular fashion week activities: "I went to a meeting with a potential book publisher, because I am starting to wrap my head around doing my next book, which I am really excited about. I've gotten a little bit of my creative writing fill with doing the Zoe Report, my daily newsletter, and really remembered how much I love writing." Funny, because I met the Zoe Report's ghost blogger a couple weeks back! (Nice girl.) [Time]
• Jil Sander's line for Uniqlo, +J, starts hitting stores on October 1. The legendary German perfectionist says, "I like the concept of basic clothes in a democratic world. Uniqlo reminds me of Apple computers; fantastic design for everyone. And I like what is Japanese about Uniqlo, a strong sense of tradition, the orderly approach to everything, great know-how and logistics." Uniqlo dreams of taking over the position of Inditex — parent company of Zara — as the world's largest apparel company by 2020. The success of the retail chain's planned expansion will rest in large part on Sander's talents. [Telegraph]
• Journalistic pet peeve #1: Confusing "discrete" for "discreet." Journalistic pet peeve #2: Spending ten minutes reading an article that tediously explains events that happened a year ago. Who doesn't already know that last fall, "upscale department stores...started slashing prices to unload a glut of inventory. Saks fired the first volley, slapping 70%-off signs on luxury designer clothing in early November 2008. Neiman and Barneys frantically followed suit." [Time]
• For some apparel trade news that is actually, you know, news, how about this: apparel sales rose 2.4% from July to August, the biggest month-to-month increase since February. Sales were still down 5% on last August. [NYTimes]
• If more couples are staying home to have sex because of the recession — sex being, as Chip Lambert pointed out in The Corrections, one of the few pleasures in life that's actually free — wouldn't we be buying fewer pajamas, not more? [Telegraph]
• Courtney Love's fashion week highlights, so far: "Me playing at Alexander Wamg. That was certainly the fucking best. And then the second best was me playing at Alexander Wang." Anything else? "The Rodarte bitches were awesome." [The Cut]
• Abercrombie & Fitch has lost its appeal in the discrimination case brought by the family of an autistic girl who was not allowed to go into a changing room with her sister at the Mall of America store. The then-14-year-old was shopping with her then-17-year-old sibling, who notified a sales assistant that her sister had a disability and could not be left alone. In court, Abercrombie trotted out a psychologist as an expert witness who said that, "this experience is best considered to be a desirable outcome of active community involvement." Because having Abercrombie refuse to make a reasonable accommodation "offers the parents the opportunity to model social problem solving and coping skills to their daughter, as they have done so well throughout her life, and thus prepare her for such future natural community experiences." Abercrombie was fined $115,264. [MPR]
• Dan Ariely, the professor who studies branding and behavior and who concludes that wearing counterfeit designer goods makes people more dishonest in their every day life — on the basis of one study, which lacked a control group — is back to explain his nifty ideas in video format. How about this new rule for science: No studies where the scientist explains his methods thus: "We got Chloé to give us sunglasses..." And no studies that are presented at conferences convened by Harper's Bazaar. [BigThink]
• Dan Caten, one half of DSquared, on the brand's new eyewear line: "It's a way that people can buy into the brand. Maybe some people can't afford to buy the clothes or fit in the clothes." Instead of making clothes above a size 10, let's license out some sunglasses! (Average price: $391.) Perfect solution. [WSJ]
• Ann Taylor is holding an in-season runway show tonight in New York, with a real fashion quotient: Kate Young will be styling. It's all part of the retailer's attempt to turn around its dowdy image. (You may have noticed the new ad campaign starring model Cameron Russell.) [WWD]
• Heidi Klum, whom you may have heard of, is taking Cameron's spot for the retailer's holiday ads. But don't expect her at the show, because she's expecting, and can't fly to New York. [NYPost]
• Vogue's publisher, Tom Florio, doesn't want to talk about McKinsey — but he will take a softball on why he goes to fashion shows: "I look for trends in the business. Like the whole idea of luxury at a better price point, which is something Tory Burch is doing. I try to get a sense of the sociological trends which our editors will adapt. It just adds a little context. You need to understand the business trends like global warming and fabrics getting lighter and more transitional pieces in fashion. If you can speak intelligently about these things when you sell ad pages, you can sort of take their [advertisers'] point of view." [NYObs]
• Burberry, which already has around 600,000 Facebook friends, is launching its own social networking site at artofthetrench.com. Christopher Bailey has commissioned Scott Schuman to take pictures of people wearing Burberry trench coats around the world for the site. Users will also be able to send in pictures of themselves wearing Burberry trench coats. [FT]
• The British brand will also stream its Prorsum fashion show live over the Internet. It's scheduled for September 22, 6:30 p.m., London time. [WWD]
• Avon president Elizabeth Smith is leaving the company. No replacement has yet been named. [Crain's]
• French Connection has laid off 50 workers at its head offices and closed its offices in Denmark and Sweden as a response to continued weak sales. [Independent]

• Lindsay Lohan thew a fit at the G-Star runway show:

She arrived with sister Ali in tow, wouldn't pose for photos and didn't like her seats. So, naturally, she threw the seating cards for Juliette Lewis, Christian Siriano, and Taylor Momsen on the floor. When event producers tried to approach her, she sniped, "Don't fucking touch me," and rolled her eyes. Of course, I found pix of her posing so grain of salt. [Page Six]

• Mischa Barton was at the G-star after party, drunk and saying "Like, I'm with the deejay. I totally know the deejay. I'm here for the deejay." [Page Six]
• Kanye West and Lady Gaga were supposed to start a Fame Kills tour later this fall, but it looks like Kanye may have been serious about taking some time off: Tour date listings have been removed from the Ticketmaster website. [LA Times]
• Pink has a separated shoulder! "It hurts," she says. She couldn't do any of the aerial parts of her trapeze-oriented show in Seattle on Tuesday night, but won't cancel tour dates. [People]
• Katie Holmes took Suri to Beyoncé's concert in Australia on Tuesday night, and Suri wore "industrial earmuffs." [News.com.au]
• Jennifer Lopez was spotted at the White House "with an entourage bigger than President Obama's Secret Service detail." [NY Daily News]
• Chris Brown's community service has begun; click for a pic of him in an orange vest. He doesn't seem too… contrite; he Tweeted, "check out my outfit." [Ny Daily News]
• Why haven't we seen Mo'Nique promoting new film Precious? She will be on the Today show this morning, but she wasn't at the Toronto Film festival (Mariah Carey, Gabby Sidibe, Sherri Shephard, and Paula Patton were there) and rumors are that she wants to be paid for appearances. A studio spokesperson says it isn't true. [Showbiz 411]
• Charlize Threron is naked in the opening scene of her new film, The Burning Plain but says: "I'm not some exhibitionist. I think people think I just love walking around naked. When you start making it about yourself, you stand in the way of doing your job. I have to sit in an editing room with [director] Guillermo Arriaga and a bunch of execs, and if I had to sit there and think about myself and these men watching me, I think that would make me insecure. I'm just like every other girl out there. I would cringe." And: "There was a time in my life where I understood actors who said they don't like watching themselves. But when I made the mental switch that I was not watching myself and watching an actual character, that was the day I actually could look at things from a distance." [USA Today]
• "The uncle Desperate Housewives star Teri Hatcher helped put behind bars for molesting two girls has died in prison." [Daily Express]
• Sean Penn and beyond foxy Sports Illustrated model Jessica White: "Together all the time." [NY Daily News]
• Jason Schwartzman's new HBO show, Bored To Death, his most high-profile roles ever. Although he also loves books and music, acting gives him focus: "When I all of sudden became a part of Rushmore, it was like a giant acupuncture needle or something. It just put everything in line for me. It was like going to the emotional chiropractor. I was so disjointed as a teenager, from being unpopular or from being not the guy that girls liked - just feeling like an outsider, just being a dork." [AP]
• Nicole Kidman will star in The Danish Girl, about the first man to undergo a sex-change operation in 1931. I know it's early but I have to say that I'm sort of scared about the medical technology back then and its proximity to genitalia. [NY Daily News]
• Bruce Willis and wife: Moving into L.A.'s new Carlyle Residences, where apartments go for $2.9-$15 million. The new pad has a private wine cellar and elevator. [E!]
• Rod Stewart's son Sean was a riding in a $200,000 Bentley on Sunset Boulevard in L.A. when his friend wrecked the car. Sean was renting it from Beverly Hills Rent-A-Car for $2,500 a day. [TMZ]
• Jasmine Guy: Deep in debt, thanks to a divorce. In related news, she has joined the cast of the new CW show Vampire Diaries as the GRANDMOTHER of one of the characters. A different world, indeed. [TMZ, Buddy TV]
• Director Jane Campion got an admiring letter from Quentin Tarantino about her latest effort, Bright Star. "It was a love letter, really, about the film," she says. "I am really touched. He is one of my biggest heroes of the current generation, I think he is a genius so it was surprising." Asked about what it takes to make movies likes hers, Campion said with a smile: "I am not very submissive." [Reuters]
• Joe Francis tried to crash a party being thrown by Frankie Delgado but was thrown out, mostly because Frankie is bff with Brody Jenner and Brody and Joe had a scuffle a couple of weeks ago. Related: I don't care about any of these people. [E!]
• "Fuming Barbra Streisand fans claim she rigged a 'cute pet competition.' so one of her friends could win priceless tickets to her upcoming Village Vanguard show." [Page Six]
• Burt Reynolds, who just went into rehab, is already out, it seems. [Reuters, Mirror]
• Jon Bon Jovi totally understands why former members of Nirvana are upset about Kurt Cobain's character in Guitar Hero 5 being able to play songs by other bands in the game. "I don't know that I would have wanted it either. To hear someone else's voice coming out of a cartoon version of me? I don't know. It sounds a little forced." [BBC News]
• "Paul McCartney topped a poll of Americans' favorite Beatles, but nearly a quarter of those surveyed said they didn't like the British rock group." [Reuters]
• Katie "Jordan" Price named her celebrity rapist on camera but "terrified" lawyers banned his identity from being broadcast. [The Sun]
• Q. After you dropped out of school at 16, you were a drummer in a punk rock band. What was that like? "It was a wild time. It involved a lot of drinking and fighting, but I'm not sure if I was being a punk rocker or just Scottish." — Craig Ferguson. [USA Today]
• "She looked like Rachel Zoe gone horribly wrong! It proves the point that you can judge a person by the company they keep- or don't keep. "It's painfully apparent that Jesus may be able to turn water into wine, but your basic blow dryer eludes him." — Madonna's brother, Christopher Ciccone, on his sister's look at the VMAs. [E!]
• Q. Did you really write the book's first chapter on your iPhone? "I actually did. I was amazed it had this little keyboard in it. I'm a techno-moron and it had this keyboard that spellchecked as you wrote. It was a good way to start writing the novel because I wasn't taking it seriously, I was just checking out my phone. The rest I wrote by hand." — Nick Cave on his second novel, The Death of Bunny Munro. [Time]
• "It's always so hard for me to describe a film I'm in, as it's so subjective. It's about a lot of different people living in Paris, and a mix of many sides of life, not all happy ones. If you don't go to the bottom, you don't know what joy is, and to explore life you have to plunge head first and take risks. And the way we're brought up with this whole view of life as black and white, good and bad, is completely false, because in life everything is transformable, and something bad can actually be very good, and vice versa. So it's about all those ideas." — Juliette Binoche on her new film, Paris. [Reuters]
• "Yeah. But I don't want to elaborate. I would never call myself a cutter. Girls go through different phases when they're growing up, when they're miserable and do different things, whether it's an eating disorder or they dabble in cutting… I never think I'm worthy of anything... I have a sick feeling of being mocked all the time. I have a lot of self-loathing." — Megan Fox to Rolling Stone, when asked if she had ever cut herself. [NY Daily News]
• "I made my wife appreciate it. She was a good sport. I paraded around. I loved my body. I walked around, danced — dancing with a belly like that was fun. My stepdaughter loved it, too. She kept poking me in the stomach, laughing." — Matt Damon on gaining 30 pounds for The Informant!. [USA Today]
• "Jennifer is one of the coolest women I've ever met. She's so smart." — Gerard Butler on Ms. Aniston. [MSNBC Scoop via Us Weekly]

• Is Jon Gosselin trying to look bad? He's returned the two family dogs to the breeder. "Jon blames Kate for having to give up the dogs," says a source. "Of course, these days Jon blames Kate for just about everything."

• Jon says Kate isn't taking care of them properly, but another source says it was always Jon's responsibility to take care of the dogs. It's more than Kate can handle and he made no arrangements to care for them when he moved to New York. [Radar Online]
• Kate Gosselin said on The View that Jon Gosselin brought Hailey Glassman over to meet their children. Now Jon says, "I've never brought Hailey to meet the kids, nor do I plan on doing that anytime soon." Hailey Tweeted: "I was never at Jon and Katezilla's house nor did I meet the children, And nor am I in a rush to..." [E!]
• Jon Gosselin has been dropped by his divorce lawyer. The divorce was supposed to be finalized next month, but this should delay the process. [My Fox Philly]
• Kate Major says, "I will take a lie detector test and I would love for Jon to take a lie detector test because for him to say there was no romance is a complete lie," adding, "I think I was in lust with him, but no, I didn't love him." [People]
• Stephanie Santoro's mom says Jon Gosselin asked her daughter, "If she would call Hailey and calm Hailey down and tell her that they never had a relationship, that they never went to eat together, that they never did anything together; that all she was, was a friend and a sitter to the children." Stephanie refused. Her mom adds, "He told Stephanie that he cared for Hailey, but he didn't see her as the person he wanted to spend his life with. He didn't see her as a stepmother figure for the children, but he said that he couldn't end it now because there was too much stuff, like the clothing line, that Hailey was involved in. He had to be careful how he handled everything." [Radar Online]
• Chris Brown may have Tweeted toda "on my way to community service...," but the judge who sentenced him actually said he'd be doing, "actual physical labor, as opposed to some type of community service." [TMZ]
• There are pictures of him cleaning up a roadside lot while wearing an orange vest... and a "wife beater". [Radar Online]
• Burt Reynolds has checked into rehab to deal with his addiction to prescription medication. His manager says, "After a recent back surgery, Mr. Reynolds felt like he was going through hell and after a while, realized he was a prisoner of prescription pain pills. He checked himself into rehab in order to regain control of his life. Mr. Reynolds hopes his story will help others in a similar situation. He hopes they will not try to solve the problem by themselves, but realize that sometimes it is too tough to do on their own and they should seek help, as he did." [People]
• An excerpt of Patrick Swayze's upcoming memoir The Time of My Life was released today in which he wrote after he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, "I began thinking to myself, I've had more lifetimes than any 10 people put together, and it's been an amazing ride. So this is okay." [Reuters]
• Star claims Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler's romance is "for real" because they went on a romantic dinner date, even though sources at the restaurant in question have already said they were out with a group of people and didn't even sit next to each other. [Star]
• Aaron Eckhart says his Love Happens co-star Jennifer Aniston "keeps good people around her. She's interested. She asks questions. She gets outside of herself and lives, I would say at the very least, an interesting life. It's not really always her own. She deals with it very well." [People]
• "This time around, TV feels better, and The Beautiful Life feels like a better fit for me as a television show. It's a much happier experience because I'm older and I can see everything for what it was now. I was 16 when I went to do The O.C., and it was a great experience, it changed my life. It made me famous and everything. But this time around I can actually sit back and enjoy the experience and know what's coming and just have a good time with it. I think it's cool to see the younger cast members enjoying it for the first time." — Mischa Barton [L.A. Times]
• When asked about her recent psychiatric episode Mischa Barton said, "I'm getting sick of answering questions about it. I just had a bad time of year and now it's all over and done with, and I'm just very happy to be feeling happy again and back on top of it and not so worried about everything. It was just too much to handle for me at the time." [N.Y. Observer]
• Matt Damon says George Clooney's girlfriend Elisabetta Canalis is "a really, really wonderful woman... It's nice to see my friend so happy." [People]
• "I would rather have a prostate exam on live television by a guy with very cold hands than have a Facebook page." — George Clooney [People]
• The LAPD is wrapping up their investigation of Michael Jackson's death and sources say it will be presented to the L.A. County District Attorney in three to four weeks. [TMZ]
• Things got uncomfortable on The Jay Leno Show when Jay started asking Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz about sex. Jay wanted to know if Tom had ever been to a strip club, and Tom replied, "Actually I never have been, ever. Sorry to disappoint you." Diaz added, "It's kind of hard to be Tom Cruise and go to a strip club." Then Jay asked, "I know you're a pilot, what are you better at – flying or sex?" Tom squirmed in his seat and said, "You know what, I don't know... I try to excel in all areas and I've never been asked for a refund, so I don't know." [Daily Mail]
• Guitarist Joe Satriani has dropped his lawsuit against Coldplay for allegedly stealing parts of his songs. It's unclear whether they made a finacial settlement, but Coldplay will not be required to admit they did anything wrong as part of their agreement. [BBC]
• Zachory Loring, the man Audrina Patridge says is stalking her, was arrested yesterday on two outstanding warrants for vandalism and disturbing the peace. His mom was the one who reported him to the police. He's still in jail, and has been served with the restraining order Audrina requested while behind bars. [TMZ]
• Lauren Conrad was excited to guest judge America's Next Top Model because "I don't watch a lot of TV, but it is one of the few shows I watch. I'm such a fan of Tyra. So when they contacted me, I said yes. I knew it would be a great experience. [Working with the Top Model judges] was a treat." [People]
• Kristin Cavallari is denying that she's having a secret relationship with John Mayer. "I literally met John one time for five minutes," she said. "I am single, I'll tell you that. I'm 22. Why have a boyfriend? I'm having fun." [Us]
• Jessica Simpson's dog Daisy is still missing and was last seen in the clutches of a wild coyote. Jessica used a dog-finding service called FindToto.com that called 1000 of her neighbors to ask for tips about the dog, but so far no one has called in about Daisy. [TMZ]
• Paris Hilton has released a very detailed statement, saying that the reason she skipped several nightclub appearances in Germany was that "Miss Hilton's security visited the ‘night club' booked for the appearance and discovered it was a strip club, the venue had been misrepresented to Miss Hilton by the talent promoters. Miss Hilton does not support or endorse strip clubs and this type of establishment." [Perez Hilton]
• Aretha Franklin says of her performance at the Presidential inauguration, "I should have done what some of the other artists did, and that was to pre-record." [WWD]
• Leelee Sobieski and her fiance Adam Kimmel are expecting their first child together in December. [Us]
• Jenna Elfman is expecting her second child with husband Bodhi Elfman. "I have a baby in my tummy – but a real one, not just for my TV show," she said. "My character's pregnant the whole first season [of Accidentally On Purpose], so I said, 'It's a good time to have another baby, because we won't have to hide it.'" [People]
• Elizabeth Taylor keeps a picture of Richard Burton on her nightstand and says they would have married for a third time if he was still alive. "She still says had he lived that they'd be back together once again - that it would have been third time lucky. They were mad about each other," said Burton's niece Sian Owen. "She believes that in the last years in their lives when everything had been toned down with the drinking and everything else, she believes that they'd be together. She's certain of that, they were soul mates." [Daily Mail]
• Tim McGraw says of Kanye West's VMA incident, "He shows himself to be an idiot every time he does stuff like that, [My girls] were upset. But what he did do is provide a great example of how not to be, and my girls learned a big lesson... when they weren't looking I said, 'He needs an a— whoopin'!' [People]
• Though Nas and Kelis are in the midst of a heated financial and custody battle, they appeared together at Russell Simmons gala for Hair Rules salon. [TMZ]
• Cyndi Lauper says she's actually trying to dress less flamboyantly to play a psychic on Bones. "I didn't think I should look like Rhoda from the '70s," she said. [AP]
• Rolling Stones guitarist Ronnie Wood's girlfriend Ekaterina Ivanova threatened, "I'm going to kill myself. You are going to find me dead," after the two had a fight early Monday morning during which the police were called. He reportedly responded "Fuck off home you s***." [What s-word do you think he used?" [Daily Mail]
• Kara DioGuardi is shopping a new reality show called Dropped. She says, "It takes the best acts that have been dropped and gives them a second chance. You look at Katy Perry, the Jonas Brothers, Alicia Keys, and Lady Gaga, they all have one thing in common: They've all been dropped from their labels ... I was dropped. Think about how many times in your life you haven't achieved one goal, but you've achieved another one." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Karissa Shannon, who has moved into Hugh Hefner's room at the Playboy Mansion with her twin Kristina Shannon says, "Our room is pimp. We've got the round spinning bed from Chicago, a kickass big-screen TV and we have the perfect view of all the parties in the backyard. And we're getting a stripper pole in there, too." [E!]
• Kendra Wilkinson's husband, Hank Baskett, was cut from the Philadelphia Eagles to make room for Michael Vick. [People]
• Karina Smirnoff says "It's kind of easy to stay friends," with Maksim Chmerkovskiy even though they've broken up. "We were friends for 14 years, before anything else. It will always remain this way. It's not difficult. We both think the world of each other." [People]
• On The Oprah Winfrey Show yesterday, Whitney Houston's 15-year-old daughter Bobbi Kristina said she wants to pursue a singing career. "I know she hates it, but it's the plan," Bobbi Kristina told Oprah. "It's my plan. Mine. Yeah." [Access Hollywood]
• Patsy Kensit says she won't do anymore nude scenes because it would embarrass her sons, who are 17 and 10. She says, "The only way I'd do it is if nudity was intrinsic to the plot." [Daily Express]
• Michael Palin says Monty Python never would have been made if the BBC's management had meddled as much as they do today. "I think we would be looked at very carefully. There would be much more managerial interference, which there never was," said. "We were allowed to get on with our show once they had agreed it. I just don't think it would be the same nowadays and I think that is regrettable. We are in danger of having to be so accountable to everybody for everything [the BBC] does." [Daily Mail]
• Clive Owen says the recent scripts he's read, "Are not very good. And these are films that are funded and ready-to-go ­expensive movies. You're amazed that people are funding them. I start to think it's me, that I'm being too choosy." [Just Jared]
• Russell Crowe has written an apology to fans after a rugby player and a coach got into a fight at the rugby club Crowe co-owns saying, "I truly know what it is like to have an incident blow up in your face and cause shockwaves through your life. In the past I have put my parents and my wife and my extended family through some terrible times and I'm sorry for every moment of those public floggings that they have received the residual fallout from. 'I'm embarrassed just to type that sentence; some things just don't go away easily. I have learned to own and take responsibility for those times when I haven't been my best.There has been many an opportunity that has left my professional life because of people's perceptions that I am rough around the edges and perhaps unreliable.I work hard on trying to let people know that I am better than the worst of me, it's the only thing I can do." [Daily Mail]
• Beth Ditto got into a fight with Katy Perry earlier this year over the song "I Kissed A Girl," and now Ditto is calling her a "boner dyke." Ditto says, "It's a sensitive subject: we're talking about what's really going on for my people. I don't think people understand how real it is. I had surgery about three years ago. I was in the hospital - in a liberal part of the country - and my family was 3,000 miles away, and (my partner) Freddie was by my side. And Freddie got chased out of the place and treated like shit because she wasn't 'family'. It was so bad that the lady next to me in the hospital room was like, 'I've never seen anyone treated that way in my life'. And I knew it was because I was gay; the rest of my time in there, I was treated like shit. That's something 'lipstick lesbians' will never experience. So yeah, 'I Kissed A Girl' is a funny little song, but now is maybe not the best time for it." [Daily Express]
• Jemaine Clement says there isn't any tension between him and Bret McKenzie because he was nominated for an Emmy but Bret wasn't. "The fact that he is usually voted ‘best looking Conchord' is a far greater source of controversy within the band," he says. "Besides, he was a full-time musician before the show, whereas I was a full-time actor. If he'd been nominated I would have fought him." [N.Y. Times]

[New York, September 14. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

• Donald Trump is calling for people to boycott Kanye West due to "Swift-gate," "so this kind of thing doesn't happen again." He says, "He couldn't care less about Beyonce. It was grandstanding to get attention." From one who'd know. [TMZ]

• Kanye West apologized again to Taylor Swift on his blog, writing: "I feel like Ben Stiller in "Meet the Parents" when he messed up everything and Robert De Niro asked him to leave... That was Taylor's moment and I had no right in any way to take it from her. I am truly sorry." He wrote another statement last night, but it was quickly deleted. [TMZ]
• Taylor Swift told reporters after the incident, "Well, I was standing on stage because I was really excited because I had just won the award. And then I was really excited because Kanye West was on stage. And then I wasn't so excited anymore after that." [Us]
• More celebrities are weighing in on Kanye. John Mayer Tweeted: "Big love to my girl @taylorswift13. A class act." Joel Madden writes: "WOW Taylor Swift's first VMA and she didn't even get to ENJOY it. Kanye You were just a bully on that one man." Katy Perry gets right to the point: "F**K U KANYE. IT'S LIKE U STEPPED 0N A KITTEN." [TMZ]
• Kanye may have messed with the wrong lady. The guy who played "Wolf" on American Gladiators wrote: "Just thought Kanye might want to know I hang with alot of the Country Artist and I will bump into him somewhere... HARD and several times!!! He is an ass and needs taken down, maybe Criss B can be there too. School is about to open and lessons about to be taught!" [TMZ]
• Kelly Clarkson wrote a blog post addressed to Kanye saying: "I've seen you do some pretty shitty things, but you just keep amazing me with your tactless, asshole ways. It's absolutely fascinating how much I don't like you. I like everyone. I even like my asshole ex that cheated on me over you… which is pretty odd since I don't even personally know you... The best part of this evening is that you weren't even up for THIS award and yet you still have a problem with the outcome. Is winning a moon man that much of a life goal?? You can have mine if it will shut you up. Is it that important, really??" [Rolling Stone]
• Even Joe Jackson bashed Kanye, saying, "I don't know what he was doing, he jumped up on stage and snatched that microphone out of that poor girl's hand. They should blackball him out of show business for that. He just leapt up there, that was bad." [TMZ]
• It seems Russell Brand is the only one who has any sympathy for Kanye. He says, "I know Kanye, and I know he's a nice bloke. We all make mistakes in life... We're all people, these things are a bit silly, no one died." [People]
• Telepictures, the production company behind Ellen DeGeneres' and Tyra Banks' shows, wants to develop a View-like show starring Kate Gosselin and Paula Deen. "They're looking around and casting for other women to be on the show with them," said a source. "But they want all the women to be moms." [E!]
• While co-hosting The View this morning, Kate Gosselin said of her divorce, "This is definitely, I'm not going to lie, difficult... For the sake of my children, I'm going to take the high road" and not discuss the matter further. [People]
• Kate Gosselin said at the Cleveland Women's show on Friday, "I've lost a lot of control in my life," adding, "At the beginning of all of this, you've heard me say before, I didn't want fans gawking, I didn't want people gawking, I just wanted to be myself, my family. I have learned, I appreciate your support, I need you, I love you, thank you." [Us]
• On the red carpet of the Toronto International Film Festival paparazzi told Colin Farrell's sister to move along so they could get a shot of him and he grabbed a photographer by the collar and shouted at him until he apologized. [Daily Mail]
• Ne-Yo has been in the studio with Rihanna, working on her next album. He says, "Expect an edgier, almost angrier Rihanna on this one... Rihanna says some things on this album that you've never heard her say before." [E!]
• "All kinds of things keep me grounded. My dogs and having to wake up and walk them every morning and having to walk them before bed at night," says Mischa Barton. "The routine of everything I do – going to work every day here and working on a television series and how much work that is." [People]
• Elton John and his partner David Furnish won't be able to adopt a 14-month-old HIV-positive boy from Ukraine because the country requires adoptive parents to be no older than 45 and married. Elton said, "He has stolen my heart. And he has stolen David's heart and it would be wonderful if we can have a home." [AP]
• Nick Hornby and Ben Folds wrote a song called "Levi Johnston's Blues," which includes the lyrics, "I like to do some shit, do some chillin' I guess/ You fuck with me and I'll kick your ass." [New York Magazine]
• Harrison Ford says, "The story for the new Indiana Jones is in the process of taking form...Steven Spielberg, George Lucas and myself are agreed on what the fifth adventure will concern, and George is actively at work. If the script is good, I'll be very happy to put the costume on again." [People]
• Hulk Hogan is suing his own lawyers because he claims he paid them more than $1 million to represent his son Nick after his 2007 car crash but the law firm never informed him that his insurance company offered to represent him for free. [TMZ]
• Terri Irwin is getting caught up in a legal battle with the distributor of Croc Chocs and Zoogle Jellies, candies that feature a photo of Steve Irwin and are sold at the Australia Zoo. [News.com.au]
• The ACLU says Richard Hatch is being held under "harsh" conditions in a Masssachusetts jail for giving an unauthorized interview while he was on house arrest, and is being kept in solitary confinement for 23 hours a day. [USA Today]
• Oprah Winfrey says she's willing to go to Cophenhagen next month to help convince the International Olympic Committee that they should pick Chicago for the 2016 Summer Olympics. Chicago is up against Tokyo, Madrid, and Rio de Janeiro. [Chicago Tribune]
• Oprah Winfrey says even though she threw her support behind Barack Obama during the campaign, "I have not said one thing about this political situation and don't intend to... Everybody knows that I was a big campaigner for Obama and I still am. I think he's doing a great job. I think that it's the toughest job in the world with the economy and health care and all of that." [AP]
• Seth Meyers says he'll be doing 'Weekend Update' alone on the upcoming season of SNL, despite reports that Kristen Wiig would become his co-anchor. "I'm so heartbroken that the Internet, for the first time, was wrong about something," Meyers said. "How are we ever going to trust the Internet again?" [CNN]
• Lil Wayne's first child with Lauren London was born last Wednesday, and singer Nivea claims that she's also pregnant with his child. He already has two children from previous relationships. [E!]
• Michael Bay says he doesn't approve a letter from the crew of Transformers calling Megan Fox stupid and ungracious after she compared Bay to Hitler. He wrote on his website, "I don't condone the crew letter to Megan... and I don't condone Megan's outlandish quotes. But her crazy quips are part of her crazy charm. The fact of the matter is I still love working with her, and I know we still get along. I even expect more crazy quotes from her on 'Transformers 3.'" [UPI]
• On the finale of America's Got Talent on Wednesday nigh,t Susan Boyle will wear a Suzanne Neville dress the designer says will "really wow" the crowd. She says, "The brief was to make Susan look super elegant and so we created a long, classic black gown for Susan to wear." [People]
• At the Toronto Film Festival David Duchovny said of his wife Tea Leoni and their two kids, "I had to leave them this morning to come here – that's tough," adding that though he and Tea separated last fall now at home, "Everything is great." [People]
• RHOA's Kandi Burrus says of her relationship with her fiance AJ, "We're on hiatus. He's a great guy and he's not the type to sit on his behind like a scrub, so it has nothing to do with that. Yes, he has a lot of children, and yes, I didn't know about them all at first but I got over it because as long as you handle your responsibility and spend time with your children it's not an issue for me. Another thing I want to set the record straight on is that AJ was married before. A lot of people make comments like, if he didn't marry his other children's mothers then why do you think he's going to marry you." [ONTD]
• Robert Downey, Jr. says of his relationship with Jamie Foxx's character in The Soloist, "In some ways the film feels like a love-story. A platonic love story, of course. But it's also about faith – about believing in that connection between people, and to me that means believing in ourselves. It's funny to say this about what I guess is a big Hollywood movie, but actually it feels like something more personal, something quite pure." [The Telegraph]
• Beth Ditto says she doesn't mind that many people know who she is, but have never heard her music. She explains: "I'm not someone who says, 'It's all about the music, dude.' As a woman I think the media really want to see you demonised for having a life outside your musical family. A woman has her nuclear family, and that's supposed to be all there is, and if she steps outside that role of wife, mother or daughter to become an independent personality, she's immediately criticised for neglecting her motherly duty. That's exactly how I feel about Gossip; like I should have that motherly duty to my band. If I were a man I don't think it would be a problem." [The Independent]

• Russell Brand on the Kanye West incident at the VMAs:

"You don't like to see people upset. But I think it just gets exciting, live television, live events. People get worked up and things happen." [AP]

• "However rude Kanye West's intrusion may have been, it suited the controversy the VMAs openly crave." [NY Times]
• Philippe van den Bossche, the boss of Madonna's Raising Malawi charity, has quit after falling in love with Madonna's trainer, Tracy Anderson — also famous for sculpting Gwyneth Paltrow's physique. [Page Six]
• Is Oprah in trouble? This report notes: "Winfrey is still the queen of daytime television, but the aura of invincibility is gone. The average viewership for The Oprah Winfrey Show slipped under 7 million last season, down 7 percent from the year before, according to Nielsen Media Research. One week during the July rerun season, the show had its lowest ratings since its 1985 debut." [AP]
• Colin Farrell: Having another baby. He and girlfriend Alicja Bachleda are expecting their first child. Colin has a 5-year-old son James from a previous relationship with model Kim Bordenave. [Us Magazine]
• At a red carpet event, a photographer asked Colin Farrell's sister to step away to Colin could be photographed alone. Colin got mad and confronted the snapper, who says: "I was just saying, 'Please can everyone clear the carpet, move on.' He took it personal. He said, 'Do not shout at my sister like that, do not ever speak to my sister like that ever.'' [Daily Express]
• Deepak Chopra knew Michael Jackson for 20 years, and he says of Michael's death: "It was caused not by the drugs he had been taking for years — He was a very controlled addict. But by him being given a particular drug that is so powerful that I have never heard of it being used anywhere but in an operating theater with breathing tubes and a ventilator… This is something bigger and is happening all the time – and not just in Hollywood. The number one cause of drug addiction in America right now is medical prescriptions. We have to wake up to that." [Telegraph]
• Elton John would like to adopt a Ukrainian boy named Lev, but the country bans gay couples from adopting children. In addition, Elton and partner David Furnish are considered too old to be adoptive parents. But click the links to see adorable pix of the tot. [The Sun, NY Daily News]
• Ugh, some of the comments on this Elton John story are vile. [Page Six]
• Gisele Bundchen hates when her personal real estate business is in the paper. [Page Six]
• Lionel Richie says now that daughter Nicole has given birth to son Sparrow, "She is the happiest woman ever. She is just in total control. I'm the one that's nervous!" He also jokes: "Harlow right now is enjoying the baby until she finds out it's staying." And: "[Sparrow] looks just like Harlow." [People]
• John Mayer was at a bar in NYC when someone got stabbed; Mayer and other patrons were "seen fleeing." [Page Six]
• Susan Boyle's first single has been revealed: It's a cover of The Rolling Stones' "Wild Horses." [Mirror]
• Tila Tequila has apparently been mentioning Chris Brown in her Tweets; Chris Brown has responded: "NOT TRYNA BE RUDE but i keep hearing tila bringing my name up. ur 15 seconds of fame has ended. dont try to gain fans by dissing me.godbless." [TMZ]
• Mischa Barton is working on her new show The Beautiful Life, but while doing so, she has been ordered to stay away from booze, boys and bad behavior. She complained to cast members: "All I can do is smoke cigarettes." [Page Six]
• Lost is scheduled to end on Wednesday, May 19, 2010. Mark your calendars. [ONTD via LostBlog]
• Ugh. Here's a "joke" an NFL announcer made during a Detroit Lions game: "Going from two Super Bowls in Pittsburgh to the winless Detroit team — that's like going from dating Beyoncé to Whoopi Goldberg." [TMZ]
• "Russell Brand romanced model Christy Peterson for three months without seeing another girl. Then he told her to go shopping with his mum and had sex with a fan and a stripper." [News.com.au]
• "Prince Harry leaves nightclub ten minutes after Chelsy Davy... as he misses Lord Freddie Windsor's wedding." [Daily Mail]
• Interested in a Hollywood Hills 5,334 square foot 1929 Spanish-style house or a 4,062 square foot three-story contemporary Mediterranean home with a guesthouse? Ben Stiller and Christine Taylor are selling, and you only need around $12.5 million [UPI]
• Jay Leno's new show is related to NBC's decision to split football drama Friday Night Lights between DirecTV and NBC. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Dancing With The Stars' Maksim Chmerkovskiy is "still nursing a broken heart but doing okay" after his breakup with Karina Smirnoff. [People]
• Chandra Wilson has been nominated four consecutive years for her portrayal of Miranda Bailey, the no-nonsense chief resident on ABC's Grey's Anatomy, but is still looking for her first win. She says: "The thing that always impresses me whenever I go on the website each year to cast my little vote for myself, there are like 400 women there! So to even get in the top five, narrowed down from all those women, that's already amazing. I'm a huge fan of Sandra's work on this show. So the fact that we keep coming in together, I'm highly complimented by that. I also think it's a big testament to the show remaining as current as it is, six years in." [NY Times]
• Harrison Ford was honored with a tribute to his career at the 35th Deauville American Film Festival in Normandy, France, and got all choked up. Han Solo doesn't cry! [Daily Mail]
• Director Niki Caro and actress Keisha Castle-Hughes paired up in 2002's divine Whale Rider, and have reteamed for new film The Vinter's Luck. [USA Today]
• Couple alert: Chace Crawford and Bar Refaeli. [NY Daily News]
• Formula 1 driver Lewis Hamilton has dumped girlfriend Nicole Scherzinger of the Pussycat Dolls, telling her he is not ready for marriage and children. But she was quoted as saying: "My dream is to do my own music one day, to have an unbelievable tour, to have done some musical theatre and some film and maybe to have opened up a performing arts school for special needs kids. That is my ultimate dream — not marriage." [Mirror]
• Even though they broke up 22 years ago, The Smiths are gaining new fans, thanks to 500 Days Of Summer. [Independent]
• ABBA's Benny Anderson on rumors that the group will create music for a sequel to Mamma Mia!: "it's not going to happen. There will not be another, quote unquote, Abba musical." [UPI]
• "Sir Michael Caine described his latest vigilante film as a 'warning' of the way British society is heading." [Mirror]
• Kirk Douglas, 92, Is the oldest person on MySpace. He recently sent son Michael Douglas a message which read: "I've got 800 new friends, what should I do?" [Mirror]
• I Can Do Bad All By Myself opened at the top of the weekend box office with more than $24 million in ticket sales. [NY Daily News]
• Blind items! "Which has-been action hero has knocked up his comely assistant? When his longtime girlfriend learned of the impending birth, she angrily split… Which world-famous actor has fallen out with his equally A-list director? They have weeks to go on their upcoming block buster, but the actor thinks the director is arrogant and dismissive of his ideas, while the director considers his leading man to be a spoiled, over rated punk." [Page Six]
• "I'm not that motivated nor do I see that many good projects that make me want to take me away from my family. So much so, that his young children see mummy as the film star in the family. All they know was daddy makes pancakes because I did not have a movie to show them." — Michael Douglas. [Mirror]
• "It feels like we have been away for a long time. The four of us were feeling really nervous about coming back home." — Chris Martin, on Coldplay playing its first UK gig this year. [BBC News]
• "I am comfortable singing in a context like that. I am least comfortable singing karaoke, and less comfortable singing in cabarets. I really only like singing when you understand the context, so an awards show is fine." — Neil Patrick Harris on the Emmys, which he'll be hosting Sunday. [USA Today]
• "You're surrounded by cameras, you're surrounded by film crews, you're surrounded by equipment. It's, like, the most empty, unromantic experience ever." — Penn Badgley on kissing scenes on Gossip Girl. [USA Today]
• "I'm not a great actor. I don't fool myself to think that I am. Most of the work that I get is through having really good relationships with people and being dependable… We all have to put each other in check. Otherwise, people start to become delusional about who they are and what they are and what they're contributing to the world." — Ashton Kutcher. [New York Magazine]
• "Popular music has an emotional-intelligence quotient that's geared much toward younger people. It's all about [he flattens his voice to a disaffected teen monotone] 'You left me. Why did you leave me? I still love you. I tried so hard to stop loving you.' And it's like, well, I relate to that, I just don't want to think about that. When you're younger, you want to wallow in it. When you get older, you still love the person, and wonder why they don't love you. You just have other things to do." — Alec Baldwin. [New York Magazine]
• "At one of the orgies there was this bunny - there was a rabbit, who was just sitting there staring at us. We all kept saying, 'Look that bunny's still there.' And after about 45 minutes, I thought, 'Maybe he's hurt,' and I started to walk over to it and it took two hops and I was like, 'Nope, he's just a pervert.' … He was pervy Peter Rabbit!" — Michelle Forbes, aka Maryann from True Blood. [People]
• "I'm happy to be a representative for curvier women, but I don't really want to be known as 'the fat one.' I don't really mind what people want to say about me, but it's just that I have two daughters and I don't want them growing up to believe that flesh is something to be ashamed of, particularly at their age. They need to understand not to take any notice. I'm happy with my shape." — Nigella Lawson. [Telegraph]
• "It's just a working relationship. We all have our different things that we're doing. We're not friends, but we are cordial." — Sheree Whitfield, on fellow Real Housewives Of Atlanta castmates NeNe, Kim, Lisa and Kandi, whom Sheree says she doesn't really hang out with. [E!]
• "It doesn't really matter, those are Michael's kids. He raised those kids. They were in his arms when they were born." — La Toya Jackson, when asked about the biological father of Michael Jackson's children. [NY Daily News]
• "I recognized myself in that character and most of all, I recognized that I have seen the Precious girls of the world and they have been invisible to me. None of us who see the movie can walk through the world and allow the Preciouses to be invisible again." —Oprah, on the lead character in Precious, the film for which she is the co-executive producer. [AFP]
• "[Director] Karyn Kusama and I are both outspoken feminists. We wanted to subvert the classic horror model of women being terrorized. I want to write roles that service women. I want to tell stories from a female perspective. I want to create good parts for actresses where they're not just accessories to men… The friendships that I had as an adolescent had this unparalleled intensity. I wanted to show how almost horrific that devotion can be. It's almost parasitic." — Diablo Cody on Jennifer's Body. [Reuters]

[New York, September 8. Image via INF]