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Manhattan Moms Extol Virtues Of Water Birthing
New York, 10:47 AM
Fri Dec 18
65 posts in the last 24 hours
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Manhattan Moms Extol Virtues Of Water Birthing |
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11/13/08
Seriously, Jezebel you've got to raise the tone of your birth coverage, because currently it sucks more than a ventouse.
11/13/08
11/13/08
Looks like it is time for me to mention once again that dear friends lost their baby during a home-birth due to last-minute unforeseen complications.
Especially if you've never given birth before, you do not know what your body is going to do. And you will not know for sure that you and your baby are without complications until the baby is out of your body, at which point calling 911 might or might not help. Many many babies are born without serious complications -- but no doctor and no midwife can tell you this ahead of time.
So, much as I support women exercising as much choice as possible, and that includes having a doula to advocate for you and not taking drugs if you don't want them, some thing just strike me as... narcissism.
Who gives a rat's ass if you do it at home in a tub, annoy the neighbors and get to applaud yourself for virtuous frontier-style labor after the fact? Your baby sure doesn't.
11/13/08
... is cracking me up. Well said.
11/13/08
Also, every time I see your name now, I can only think of Winston the FourFour kitteh, and that makes me happy.
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11/13/08
I understand the bulk of this community is pre-motherhood- so this may be the reason most of the comments and posts are incredibly misinformed and plain old ignorant. It just seems really sad that everyone is so "yay doctors and hospitals!" and "ew! pain ew! participating in a completely natural event!"
This is a feminist site? How about supporting ALL women and their birthing choices? Seriously, the way we give birth is important! It effects your self worth, your hormones, your heath, and your baby's health.
I have three kids- one hospital born with midwife and drugs, one hospital born with midwife and no drugs, one born in the bathtub at home (midwife, no drugs). The experience of giving birth is a peak experience- it changes you. And in my experience, as well as that of many other women, giving birth without intervention was painful- but also empowering and something I wouldn't do any other way. It changed the way I came into motherhood- psychologically, emotionally and hormonally.
What a horribly classist assumption that only women who live in a house are entitled to give birth in the manner of their choosing!
eh, I debate even bothering to post this, but I'm so confused by Jezebel's miss on this topic every time it comes up. So I may as well...
(ps. your home has your germs. It's cleaner than a hospital. I forget which poster was concerned about that, but there you go. Also, when you poop in the water, the midwife scoops it out immediately. The article says the tub drains into a toilet, and the midwife and her assistant clean up everything. You only have as many people as you want, which is in sharp contrast to a cast of nurses you don't even know in a hospital!)
pps. Just to be clear, I'm in no way saying homebirth for all! If you don't want that, ok. But it's safe for mom and baby. It's a good idea to inform yourself, rather than kneejerking. Choice isn't just about whether we want to grow a baby, but how we get to give birth!
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But just as you reserve the right to want a home birth, I reserve the right to support doctors and hospitals and to resent the attitude that hospitals are in some way unclean staffed with unpleasant people out ot harm you and your child.
It's not simply that I did not want a home birth, it's that my baby would probably have died had I had one. Sometimes childbirth isn't about empowering the mother but about saving the baby's life.
I agree you have the right to choose but your own post makes just as many assumptions about hospital births and those who choose to have them as the kneejerkers you critisise.
11/13/08
11/13/08
It's not a case that one side is right and one side is wrong, it's whatever feels right to you, or, as in my case, the only option that you have.
I'm sorry it's just I'm getting a bit fed up of the home birth evangelists implying that its all about choice or empowerment, what if you don't have that option? Are you less of a mother? Is your experience less?
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11/13/08
There is no right or wrong here. If you are one of those people who's screaming for hours (as I probably will be - low pain threshold) during childbirth in an apartment with little insulation, please don't be too snarky if your normally reserved neighbor has a wild party one night. On the other hand, it's one night and some chick's popping out another human, and that's kinda neat.
In conclusion, as I stated previously, if you're giving birth in my building and I can hear you yelling loudly, all I ask is for a quick snuggle, because bebehs are freaking cute. (As long as I can give them back to their parents once they start pooping and/or yelling, not quite ready for that :))
11/13/08
Ahem.
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11/13/08
I had a good experience with the hospital, and ended up needing to be there. What matters is that we both made it through all right. I don't buy the "best for baby" business; it's just a way to make other mothers feel guilty for doing things differently. I wish the Times would stop giving press time to annoying jerks, and I think there's a definitely line between girl-on-girl hate and saying that something that should be private might best be kept private. Privacy does not equal shame. In some cases, it's much more akin to dignity. When we interrogate other women and each other about these kinds of choices, we forget to give them the dignity of privacy and adult judgment.
/rant
11/13/08
And then maybe I'd make contingency plans to bunk at a friend's house when neighbor went into labor, but I mean, for all we know this could happen at noon while I'm at the office. That's the other thing: Everyone seems to be assuming birth will happen in the middle of the night and wake everyone up.
11/13/08
It's nice to see how happy those two look, but I'm sorry, but there's an awful lot of gack in that water.
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11/13/08
I really believe we're over-paranoid about birth in this country. We expect it to be so painful and traumatic, and yet we're basically all strong enough to do. If it doesn't kill me, then I'm stronger than it, and why should I worry about something that I know I'm stronger than? It's a few days, at most.
However, I am NOT laying in a fucking hospital bed. Anyone who wants me on my back can kiss my ass (unless emergency intervention is needed, of course). We don't poop laying down, why would we give birth that way?
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And women are overwrought about pregnancy because they are scared of losing something very precious to them. I'm so tired of people criticizing pregnant women for being overcautious. If someone wants to eat sushi and soft cheese or drink some wine or go on a rollercoaster when she's pregnant, fine for her. And if I want to do none of those things, fine for me. Some people are more tolerant of risk than others. I lost a pregnancy once, so this time if they had told me that sitting still in an uncomfortable chair for 9 months while watching repeats of "Two and a Half Men" would guarantee me a health baby, I would have done it. And I HATE that show.
11/13/08
11/13/08
If any of you bitches give birth in my building, I fully expect to be able to come over (with permish) and snuggle the bebeh.
11/13/08
I'm guessing if these women have to pay for their beautiful, natural, home water births out of their own pockets they already suffer from rich people's entitlement issues, so a little neighborly inconvenience doesn't mean much to them.
11/13/08
However, it was treated as an out of network provider, so my out of pocket costs were much greater than if we'd gone the doctor/hospital route. So worth it. The prenatal care alone was so much better than what I've seen with people who went to OB/GYNs or OBs in a regular practice.
Insurance also paid for the hospital costs - we ended up going to the hospital because of a complication and the birth happened there, with midwife and support group present. Midwife was not allowed to do the delivery in the hospital, though. The nurses there did all the prep work and then the OB on duty came in for the big finale. It was all good. Quite an exciting ride to the hospital-- but I felt completely calm and in charge.
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