michelleduggar - Jezebel

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Boy Oh Boyle
Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
Hey, Nineteen

This Week We Loved Our Moms, Our Undies, Ourselves
Mom-To-17 Michelle Duggar Set To Birth Another Damn Baby

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morninggloria
09/16/09

In reply to Boy Oh Boyle
Being nice to ugly people is how you get to heaven.
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Penny
09/16/09

@morninggloria: Shit, I thought it was adopting three-legged animals.
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colormeroutine
09/16/09

In reply to Boy Oh Boyle
For a few of these I honestly cannot tell if they are the real ones or fake ones
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JennaW
09/16/09

@colormeroutine: I often read the real CNN headlines off to the side and think "Ha ha! So funny!" and then realize those headlines were true.
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Jenloveshercurves
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
Great-Granny had 20 children. Only 15 lived into adulthood. One set of twins, one set of triplets. She also lived into her late seventies. Though, her family with fewer children, if they didn't smoke, lived into their 90's.
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Remedios Varo can't see no huevos.
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
Does anyone know what the Duggar's stance on home vs. hospital birth?

I'm really quite impressed that Mrs. Duggar has only had 3 C-sections.
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Erda
09/10/09

@Remedios Varo can't see no huevos.: They seem to be ok with hospital birth, but I know some Quiverfulls are not. (According to the more radical ones, I'm a child of the devil for having been delivered into the world via C-section - never mind that I was breach and would likely have been stillborn otherwise!)
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Remedios Varo can't see no huevos. promoted this comment Erda was starred Erda was unstarred

Remedios Varo can't see no huevos.
09/10/09

@Erda: Thanks for the info! Also, if a baby was to be stillborn, I'm sure some of these people would just view it as an act of God.
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funnyface
09/10/09

@Remedios Varo can't see no huevos.: I believe all her kids have been delivered in the hospital.
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JennaW
09/10/09

@Erda: But if necessary, you can defeat MacBeth and save Scotland.
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Bgirl_Hamster
09/10/09

@JennaW: Love it.
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Erda
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
I know that we're supposed to say this is Michelle Duggar's personal choice, blah blah blah, but when I think you analyze the reasons behind her choice - that the Quiverfull mentality is to overrun us "godless secular liberals" by having more babies, so as to impose their ultra-extreme, Handmaid's-Tale-esque brand of evangelical Christianity on the rest us, I think it becomes more than just her issue. I think it becomes our issue, too.

We're also being ignorant if we assume that she's going on with this happily, that she isn't under enormous pressure from the doctrine of her church and her husband to do this. We have no way of knowing if it's really her choice, now, do we? She may seem chirpy and happy on her TV show and her blog, but there's also a good likelihood she's hiding the problems so as not to give Quiverfull bad PR.

I just think it's rather short-sighted to dismiss this as just a typical case of a woman wanting lotsa babies. There's a big difference between the motivation behind the Duggars' big brood and, say, Octomom or Kate Plus 8. I think we have a reason to take the Duggars a bit more seriously than the rest of the famous big families.
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funnyface
09/10/09

@Erda: I think it's really her choice. She came to the Quiverfull movement as an adult, after experiencing a miscarriage.
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LolaQuinn is full of beans
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
Next up: How many bowel movements can one person produce in a day? Says Septictank-full Movement Member Rusty Ringdorgfer, "I just want to take as many shits as God sees fit to give me, so I eat all of the eggs and prunes I can. To encourage the Lord's work, you know? When God doesn't want me to blast dookies anymore, that's fine. But until then, I'm gonna poop as many times as my body can handle, and then some. Every bowel movement is sacred."
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Habibiti
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
Even though they clearly love having children, their choice to stop planning Michelle's pregnancies was after a miscarriage, which they were told was the result of using a birth control pill. They say that to them, use of the pill then became almost the equivalent of abortion, and so decided to stop using any contraception at all, ever. This breaks my heart.
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funnyface
09/10/09

@Habibiti: I'm not sure I buy that they're "not planning" Michelle's pregnancies, and would in fact bet that they are using NFP to time sex in order to GET pregnant. Even in the no BC days, before it even existed, 19 children would have been a rare and high number.
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KATE!
09/10/09

@funnyface: Wouldn't that go against the Quiverfull movement's ideology though? They believe that humans shouldn't chose when to have children, that they should allow God to choose for them.
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funnyface
09/10/09

@KATE!: You'd think it would, but I really think they have to be working at it to have 19 kids by now, despite the fact that she nurses.
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SarahMC
09/10/09

@KATE!: Funny how god doesn't choose to give people babies unless they've chosen to have sex.
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Habibiti
09/13/09

@funnyface: That's very possible. I'm just going with what they wrote on their website to explain their philosophy of having children. It just struck me as sad that they seemed so guilty for "causing the death" of their second child, that they didn't feel like they could choose any longer NOT to have children. It put their view on child-rearing in a different light, though they also say it makes them appreciate their children more.
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CherriSpryte
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
I think some of the points here in regards to "in modern times" don't quite apply to the Duggars. From what I've read, the older kids take care of the younger ones, she started pretty young, and in terms of attention per child, don't the kids have to sign up for one-on-one time? She seems to be taking the old-school approach in terms of parenting methods.

Also, I'm VERY wary of judging people's choices based on what their bodies are able to do. Judging them because they're whackadoo Christians, I'm totally down with that.
(note: Not saying that all Christians are whackadoos. Most aren't. The quiverfull folks? Whackadoo city.)
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lisas
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
What I think is hilarious about this is that it's in "Body Odd". I'm pretty sure that a uterus isn't odd.

And I'm not sure why people are so convinced that a uterus can't grow and shrink but don't have any problems with the notion that the stomach does.
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TemplaFlop
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
In response to the idea that only religious famlies have that many kids... My dad had 11 brothers and sisters, and then they took in 5 orphaned neices and nephews, they were athiests, I also have a good friend who is an athiest who has 7 kids and is still young and working on having more. I had a proffesor in college who was agnostic and had 7 kids. I have two and want to have 4 more, I was raised as an athiest/freethinker, It's not a religious thing some people are just comfortable having a large family. In fact my husband is Catholic and he just recently started thinking that two is enough!
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Maritsa
09/10/09

@TemplaFlop: I said I was sure there were exceptions. You happen to know many. I happen to know many religious people with lots of kids. I didn't say my anecdotal experience was data.

To say it "isn't a religious thing" may be true with respect to the people you know, but my guess is that if you studied families with many children you would find a higher-than-average percentage of conservative religious people. Some, like the LDS Church and the Quiverfull movement, counsel you to have as many children as you can handle. Some, like the Catholic Church, frown on - that's putting it lightly w/r/t official doctrine - birth control.
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LaFemme
09/10/09

@Maritsa: Yeah, I thought that was kind of a give-in. Of course there are exceptions, but generally speaking most people who have very large families do so in part because their religion believes that you should not use birth control.
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twinkette
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
I don't understand the "it's God's will" theory. Yes, each child is a blessing. But would they feel the same way if God chose to take a child from them? Would they accept that as God's will too?
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linnyt is a walking cliché
09/10/09

@twinkette: the only way "God's will" will make me a mother is immaculate conception. otherwise, it's contraception all the way.
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funnyface
09/10/09

@twinkette: It makes NO sense. Farmers don't just throw their seed out willy nilly, trusting that God's will will take care of things. You don't just refuse to buy food because God's Will will provide. The idea that God wants to take away your free will and your mind is insane. And yet so many Christians I know (and I am myself a Christian) act like God wants them to give up all control of their body and life. My perspective is, if God really is a loving parent, what would a loving parent do if you called him/her up and said, "so, what job should I do for the rest of my life? just tell me!" The parent would say, "what do you enjoy? what are you good at? let's talk about this." But no good parent wants to have to dictate to their child. That takes all spiritual maturity out of the question. God wants us to be the kind of people who can make wise choices on our own, not abdicate all responsibility for our choices.
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WashingMyHair
09/10/09

@funnyface: I believe that it was God's will to have me to read Jezebel rather than work today.
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lovecake
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
My OBGYN told me that having a baby is the stupidest thing a woman could do to her body.
That being said, I don't care what this lady does with her uterus but mine is closed for business.
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ShanaElmsford
09/10/09

@lovecake: That's a really stupid thing for an OBGYN to say.
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Pandorasvoicebox
09/10/09

@lovecake: She said what?
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Pandorasvoicebox
09/10/09

@lovecake: Pregnancy isn't something you do "to" your body...it's something you do with it.
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lovecake
09/10/09

@ShanaElmsford: I don't think it was stupid to say at all. In fact, in context it was very reassuring. And in all honesty- it's true.
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slowpoke.r
09/10/09

@lovecake: Erm, really? Having a baby is stupider than doing tons of heroin, or driving drunk, or chopping off one's own limbs, or swallowing lit cherry bombs, or eating rat poison, or laying still for so long that your muscles completely atrophy, or starving yourself, or throwing yourself off a high building?

I've got more, but you get the point. I feel that perhaps you may have misunderstood or are misrepresenting what your OBGYN actually said. Hyperbole is fun and all, but that would be a truly bizarre statement for any doctor to utter under any circumstances. Are you sure she didn't say that it was the stupidest thing YOU could do, personally, for specific reasons?
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lovecake
09/10/09

@slowpoke.r: I can assure you that when it was said organically in our conversation it made the utmost sense. I am realizing now that without background it may not make sense here, but it was far from bizarre.
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slowpoke.r
09/10/09

@lovecake: Well, all the other stuff you said she said is perfectly reasonable so I guess one had to be there.

You have to admit that saying "having a baby is the stupidest thing a woman can do to her body" is pretty shocking when presented totally without context. And really, I still can't imagine an appropriate context for it. It's just such a weird statement, akin to your doctor saying "your liver is the dumbest organ" or "eyeballs are weirdos." There's a hint of truth, maybe, but overall it just doesn't seem to make any sense, you know?

Next time, please tape record your session so that you can share it with the internet and I can understand, okay? :)
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khinky
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
(le sigh) My ovaries have been buzzing a lot lately and sometimes my brain goes all fuzzy at the thought of dozens of little mini-SO's running around. I have trouble shaking myself out of it but meditating on things like incontinence, exhaustion, haemorroids and money debt really helps.
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Ipomoea
09/10/09

@khinky: if it helps, my husband's boss' wife pooped on the table during labor in front of half-a-dozen people. This ranks way up there on the THINGS I AM AFRAID OF scale.
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Kali Mama
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
Fantastic article to read on the day I ordered a mirena. Here's to gravida 1 para 1 for this chick.
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ausdenbergen
09/10/09

@Kali Mama: you're going to love it. i don't get a period any more - it's awesome!
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redqueenmeg
09/10/09

@Kali Mama: Good luck! I ordered one and got pregnant before they could put it in... while on the pill. SIGH.
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Kali Mama
09/10/09

@ausdenbergen: I had one before and I yanked it out halfway with my divacup. And my GP didn't believe me even after checking. Woohoo!
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Edited by Kali Mama at 09/10/09 2:53 PM Kali Mama was starred Kali Mama was unstarred

Dauphine
09/10/09

@Kali Mama: I've had my mirena for a couple of years now, and while it hurt like a bitch after the gynaecoloist put it in, I love it - don't believe the "It'll only hurt a little bit, mild cramps" that they tell you. I nearly passed out at the bus stop after. It's pretty much the only form of birth control other than condoms that doesn't give me migraines from hormone fluctuations.
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Ipomoea
09/10/09

@Dauphine: I think this really depends on the person-- I had been told to take the day off after getting mine inserted, but once the painful insertion was over, I was almost immediately fine and pain-free. However, I have some friends who ended up taking a week off of work to deal with the pain.
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Hana Maru
09/10/09

@It does depend on the person. I had extremely heavy periods, spotting between periods, and horrific, incapacitating pains in my uterus with Mirena. I also had lots of acne, very oily skin and hair, and severe hair loss(which is no longer in the patient information pamplet, but is in the one for doctors) Google "Mirena hair loss" if you're curious. My doctor told me to just keep taking the maximum daily dose of Tylenol for the pain, but I never knew when it was going to strike, and it doesn't last long enough for the middle of the night pains that were waking me up. One day I came in with the groceries and curled up on the kitchen floor, clutching my knees, with the ice cream melting and the door open. The next day I had it taken out and all the side effects have gone away. My hair has stopped coming out in handfuls, but it may be awhile before it grows back fully.

I don't know if you'll go through what I did, but the thing is, you never know til you get it. It's more invasive than any other hormonal method and you have to pay for it all up front, so if you can't stand it, it'll cost you doubly. I think it's irresponsible to just say "Oh I like mine, you'll be awesome"
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scarletbegonia
09/10/09

In reply to Is A Woman's Body Made For 19 Kids?
So it just comes down to: No, most people can't handle it, but if you can and want to...do it?

I still have major concerns about women who feel they cannot use birth control for religious reasons and keep having kids. I know a woman who is in her early forties and was advised not to have another child. She is anti-BC and had one anyway. Her uterus ended up exploding....pretty damn frightening. Luckily she was able to recover.
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