Jezebel
crappy hour
Posts Tagged “
michelle obama
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crappy hour
news roundup
Just Don't Go There
- In an interview on Glamocracy (also known as "the other place I blog") with Glamour's Cindi Leive, Barack Obama said that he's infuriated by right-wing attacks on his wife. Maybe he and Bill will actually have something to talk about next time they talk. [Glamocracy]
- The Nation has a new sex columnist, JoAnn Wypikewski. JoAnn thinks that there are "legions of little girls jumping out of their panties" for Obama, which manages to be stupid, demeaning, creepy and sexist all at the same time! "Ugh" is right. [The Nation, Salon]
- Oh, and conservative talk show host Michael Savage thinks that autistic children are just "[brats] who [haven't] been told to cut the act." Why the fuck do people listen to this asshole again? [Media Matters]
crappy hour
The New Yorker On Obama: When Satire Isn't Satirical
At left, the cover of this week's New Yorker, which features writer Ryan Lizza's take on Barack Obama's early years in Chicago, an article that is somehow totally related to this supposedly satirical illustration portraying Michelle and Barack as Muslim/Black Power extremists who worship Osama bin Laden and burn American flags and fist-bump and trade in their nice shoes for Birkenstocks and combat boots like I did in high school. With Moe out, I long-distance call our official Jezebel pass-around Charlie, Spencer Attackerman, to discuss the cover, the article, Spencer's beef with Mr. Lizza, and the divinity that is spätzle and beer. More »
Patriotic colors
Calling Michelle Obama An Angry Black Woman Makes Black Women Angry
The historic moment we're experiencing — in which a black man could be the president of the United States of America — has lead to a colossal conundrum: What are we going to do about Michelle Obama? Over on Salon, Erin Aubry Kaplan eloquently explains why some conservatives don't "get" Ms. Obama: "She went to Princeton, excelled, retained her racial conscience but also eventually commanded a six-figure salary. All of this confuses white people mightily, far more than Barack's biracial status. In their frame of reference, Michelle has no reason to be angry and every reason to be content." Of course, she's being painted as that go-to stereotype: The Angry Black Woman. Kaplan points out: "It's interesting, by the way, how John McCain's hotheaded ways are admired as part of his so-called maverick qualities, a willingness to follow his passions and go against the grain; it's part of his essential Americanness. Michelle Obama's candor, by contrast, is seen as entirely foreign and not a little threatening." More »
the week that was
This Week There Were A Lot Of Pregnant Teens Up In Here
- This week we discussed matters of national importance. Like threesomes.
- Michelle Obama and the role of a first lady actually are matters of national importance. But omg her dresses are purdy!
- Michelle doesn't wear short shorts. Chuck Bass wears short shorts!
- A bunch of idiot teenagers in Gloucester, Mass made a "pregnancy pact", and now a whole mess of 'em are up the stick. Sigh.
- A teen who is no longer pregnant: Jamie Lynn Spears. She gave birth to wee Maddie Briann yesterday.
- A Polish teen got caught in the middle of the abortion battle.
sexism and the election
Michelle Obama And The Place Of A First Lady
As we have previously noted, the Obama campaign has begun its Michelle Make-Over Tour which seems intended to inoculate her against the charges once leveled at Hillary Clinton — namely, that she is bitchy, entitled, power-mad, etc.. You know, attacks like these, which also go after stereotypes about African-Americans. And, on the one hand, I applaud the well-timed vaccination because obviously people are going to think certain things about her and say lots of crap about her and I prefer that Barack Obama win and certainly that he not lose because people think his wife's a bitch. But this Columbia Journalism Review article made me wonder: Are we and are they giving too much of what is great about Michelle Obama away in service of not losing because of it? More »
crappy hour
Obama Is A Machiavellian Ari Gold Sellout! Will Scarlett Johansson Notice?
Yesterday while Crappy Hour was in progress Barack Obama totally sold out the like MAJOR ISSUE OF HIS WHOLE POLITICAL CAREER and we didn't really talk about it because the campaign's media fellater relations department still hadn't distributed its key talking points, but then they sent out this video and as you can see, there is really no need for Obama to take $80 million from you taxpayers in the interest of running a "clean" campaign if he has made quite enough money already collecting from clean individuals like you and me! (Put another way: why build a welfare state when, like Toqueville pointed out, Americans have such a rich tradition of charity, concern for fellow man etc?) Anyway, so it's Friday, which means that even if we don't think this financing thing is such a huge biggie David Brooks is using it as a chance to dissuade Scarlett Johansson from carrying such a heaving torch for Obama by likening him to a fictional soulless Jew and Peggy Noonan is reminding us again of the meaning of life and everyone else is still fighting about oil and Megan and I try to get to the bottom of how much we can blame the crap economy on the war and get distracted by cute patriotic dogs. More »
rag trade
David Beckham's New Armani Ad: Yes.
- Bex bares (almost) all for Armani once more. After the item, People earnestly queries, "Tell us: What do you think of David Beckham’s ads?" Eager to see the conversation this generates. [People]
- The previously-discussed Italian Vogue featuring only models of color hits European newsstands next Thursday! "In a reverse of the general pattern of fashion magazines, all the faces are black, and all the feature topics are related to black women in the arts and entertainment." [New York Times]
- Tyra Banks is one of said black models. (Click to see awesome pix.) [Fashionista]
- Tyra's new show Stylista: OBVIOUSLY BIGGEST THING OF THE SUMMER. [Fashionista]
- "Soften your image" for only $99! Michelle Obama's View dress at Donna Ricco! [Donna Ricco]
obama rama
Michelle Obama Co-Hosts The View, Discusses Racism, Sexism, and Toned Arms
Michelle Obama co-hosted The View today, and the ladies were way excited about it (just check out Sherri Shepherd's grin in that still). Whoopi was so psyched that she wet herself—when she knocked over her mug of water. No fights broke out between Elisabeth and Michelle, and it was all very ladylike and cordial. Joy and Babs did ask Michelle some questions about Hillary, though, like whether she believes Hills had to deal with sexism during her campaign and if she will be appointed as Barack's running mate. Michelle answered like a politician. Clip above.
midweek madness
This Week In Tabloids: Why Barack Loves Michelle; Angelina Is Anxious Or Adopting
Welcome back to Midweek Madness, where we parse tabloid punditry so you don't have to. This week marked a slight departure in tabloid fare, as Us featured potential President and First Lady Barack and Michelle Obama on the cover. Don't let it throw you; the other tabloids covered all the usual players, with In Touch, Ok! and Star devoted to Brangelina's baby farm and Life & Style hot on the Britney beat. Come with us as we tell tall tales of tabloid trauma, after the jump. More »
crappy hour
Hillary Is On Vacation, But Her Biggest Fan Still Has Her Back (And Mine)
Sometimes it happens that your friends are all too busy to talk. Moe's on her way to the airport and Spencer Attackerman is not online (and hopefully not sick), but luckily, there's always one girlfriend who will pull your ass out of the fire at the last minute when she gets to the office because she rocks (even on days when we have technical issues). And, so she and I chatted about Hillary's vacation, Obama, McCain, combovers, David Patterson, how liberals like to complain and where we can send conservatives when they start. Oh, did I forget to mention who that friend is? That's right, this Crappy Hour stars Sinister Rouge, ladies. You know you're dying to read. More »
I'm not going to be around for the morning Crappy Hour but the big news is apparently the "subtle makeover" of Michelle Obama's image currently underway. Like everything else spurred by the (ignoble, ignorant, inane) ideological right I'm sort of out of things to say about this. Like Thomas Frank to Tom Delay today I'm left (heh) to mainly gawk, unsure where to start. With the spooky readiness to believe educated black professionals readily throw around the term "whitey"? With the bizarre and near-inexplicable way an entire movement seems able, on the basis of her blackness and some egging on from the eminently soberminded quarters of their foremost Anglo enabler, to project their own festering rage onto her, while simultaneously professing to be shockedshockedshocked — and so deeply offended — that anyone would deign to label the white working class "bitter"? Oh Jesus I'm going to miss my plane. [IHT]
sexism and the election
Michelle Obama Is Going To Be In For It
While a senior at Princeton University, Michelle Obama wrote her thesis on "Princeton-Educated Blacks and the Black Community." That thesis was, for months, the subject of speculation until the campaign released it in February, after which it was lambasted by many on the right (I'm only going to link to one article because the rest are even more nauseating in their ignorance) for being an example of Michelle's supposed reverse racism blah blah blah. The Boston Globe this weekend has a long piece about Michelle's collegiate experience in which she was one of 94 black students in a class of 1,141. Most of the students, by all accounts, felt pretty marginalized and she described the experience thusly: "I sometimes feel like a visitor on campus; as if I really don't belong." Naturally, to some on the right (who have never once been in the minority), this means she some sort of activist type out for black separatism or whatever those types of crazy people think about people who write about feeling marginalized when they, you know, probably are. Anyway, but this is always how it begins, right? If you can't make voters dislike the candidate, make sure they know he's got a smart wife, it means he's obviously pussy-whipped. More »
crappy hour
Is Fox News Looking For Drama With Obama's "Baby Mama"?
Oh, this will warm your heart: Fox News has dubbed Michelle Obama Barack's "Baby Mama." See, because "baby mama" is a term originating in the African American community used to delineate a status of romantic partner, somewhere between common-law spouse and "boo," that one attains by fathering or giving birth to a child. Over the years, as the term — which rhymes not only with "Obama" but more common terms like "drama" and "Cappadonna" — grew more common, it was embraced and co-opted by the Caucasian community to the point that it un-controversially became the name of a Tina Fey movie with two white leads and even, I believe, once used by my father as a term of endearment for my mother, who incidentally, popped out her firstborn (me) three years after exchanging vows with him. All of which is to say: isn't this great? It still isn't fully acceptable for even the most "down" white dudes to refer to their black friends as "My N—--" — and, let's be honest, "my nizzle" sounds really stupid — but thanks to Fox News it's now okay for white folks to refer to such a fearsomely accomplished, disciplined black woman as Michelle Obama as Barack's "baby mama." Doesn't she seem more approachable already? Anyway, that and China finally says something to Darfur about their genocide problem, another "consummate Washington insider" finds himself on the outs, Nigerian pirates and why I called Geraldine Ferraro "sweetie" with Megan after the jump. More »
news roundup
If We're All Going to Die Anyway...
- So, hooray, Ted Kennedy is out of the hospital. [NY Times]
- But, tomatoes might kill all of us, and I ain't even talking about the mutant kind. [Washington Post, Killer Tomatoes, with full info from the FDA]
- But daily sex with your partner definitely won't, though it will propel you to the top of the NY Times most emailed list and, actually, that might be more depressing than killer tomatoes. [NY Times]
- But it's okay because the Democrats "stunning" refusal to grant telephone companies legal immunity for doing potentially illegal things means the terrorists are all winning so we'll all be dead soon, so you might as well eat some damn tomatoes and try fucking tonight. [NY Times]
leftovers
Cheesy New Abstinence Magazine For Teens • Laura Bush Has Brain, Defends Michelle Obama
A new abstinence magazine promotes archaic waiting-for-marriage message with glossy pages and tips on how to "keep your wardrobe and still be modest."• Booze-delivery company targets messy lady-lushes in newest "drunk women are gross" ad campaign. • HuffPo blogger blasts McCain for selling gear for the sport of the dilettante sons of the elite (or golf) yet mocking Obama for "eating arugual" [sic, assuming she means arugula]. • Laura Bush defends Michelle Obama by saying her so-called "anti-American" comments were misinterpreted. • With gay marriage approval in CA, a new energy was injected into the Gay Pride Parade in West Hollywood. • Indian swingers use the internet to find new partners in a judge-free (yet virtual) environment. • A woman deliberately abandons son in Dallas/Fort Worth International Airport on Friday before being picked up by authorities and taken in for a medical examination. • Is buying "investment" clothing really more ethical than buying cheap throw-away fashion? • A 70-year-old mom of a toddler is happy with her life as a mother, despite what her critics say about her lifestyle choice. • NPR essayist's daughter watches ANTM for the artistic inspiration. Tyra: helping young girls, as always.
rag trade
Michelle and Cindy: Both "Perfect Political Accessories" For Fall
- Potential First-Lady fash critiqued; results inconclusive. "As for who is the more stylish - the Jackie-esque Obama or the Nancy Reagan-ish McCain — [Glamour's Suze Yalof Schwarz] says they are sartorial equals." [New York Post]
- Mel "Scary Spice" B promotes bra line: "It’s not like wearing underwear - I like walking around naked so it’s perfect for me." [The Sun]
- Hermes sues eBay for knockoffs; wins. [WWD]
- J Crew launches 'concierge service' to assist with personal shopping, private parties. "Concierges will also hold coats, packages and umbrellas." Hoity-toity! [Wall Street Journal]
- Viktor & Rolf make adorable, sinister miniature dolls dressed in their greatest hits. "Each doll's head is made by a Belgian expert who fires bisque faces in the traditional way, with hair and make-up replicating the way the models looked in the show. One is a coppery-haired micro-Tilda Swinton, commemorating the a/w 03 show in which she modelled." [The Sun]
The Tennessee Republican Party made a kinda scrappy YouTube video repeatedly juxtaposing Michelle Obama's thing about how she's proud of her country "for the first time in my adult life" with the musings of average Tennesseans about individual moments during which they've been proud of the country. Most of the events — the drafting of the Bill of Rights, for instance — didn't actually happen during Michelle Obama's adult life, but it's kind of a low blow anyway, so the campaign is mad, but the thing is I can't even get it up to be mad. I mean, the Vanderbilt guy seems like a douche, but whatever; as shameless attack ads go it's kind of...well, watch it. Also, click the pic for another picture of Michelle. And tell me those aren't the arms of a fucking patriot. Pinkos don't have arms like that, take it from me.
