• The new single from a singer named Lola is actually a track by Jennifer Lopez.

The song, titled "Fresh out the Oven," features Pitbull and is something La Lopez did "for the streets." [NY Daily News]

• Mary-Kate Olsen could have played a socialite teen vampire on TV, except the CW failed to pick up the show Blue Bloods, based on the book by Melissa de la Cruz. [Gatecrasher]
• Ellen Page will produce and write an HBO comedy called Stitch N' Bitch with Alia Shawkat and Sean Tillman. "The show follows two painfully cool hipster girls as they relocate from Brooklyn's Williamsburg neighborhood to Los Angeles' Silver Lake enclave in hopes of becoming artists — of any kind." [Reuters]
• The Russell Brand/Katy Perry romance is heating up: He texted her a love poem; she replied with a topless photo of herself. [Page Six]
• An Australian variety show has apologized for a skit involving singers parodying the Jackson Five and performing in blackface. Harry Connick Jr., who was a judge on the show, called the skit "disgusting." [AP]
• Carla Bruni claims she is in a never-ending "beauty contest" with the spouses of other world leaders; and considers Michelle Obama and Princess Letizia of Spain her rivals. [NY Daily News]
• All Hail Barbra Streisand, who beat Mariah Carey on the Billboard chart. [Ny Daily News]
• An "insider" tells the National Enquirer that Mackenzie Phillips worked as a "jet-setting call girl" in her late 20s — when she was pregnant with her son Shane. [Daily Express]
• Madonna's buying Jesus Luz a £1.7 million apartment; she's not ready to move him into the house with her four kids, but she's looking for something in walking distance of her Upper East Side townhouse. [Telegraph]
• Conan O'Brien and Newark Mayor Cory Booker have been feuding over the last two weeks, but Booker is ready to "bury the hatchet." In a written statement, O'Brien said he may not be ready to abandon Newark as a joke topic: "I want to again reiterate, I have only the highest respect for Mayor Cory Booker and the city of Newark, New Jersey — one of America's oldest, greatest, and most enduring punchlines." [CNN]
• R. Kelly has revealed that he suffers from illiteracy. "When I was trying to make it out here, I already knew, and I was stubborn about it," he says. "I don't even read really and I'm not afraid to say that. My cousins and brothers used to tease me 'you can't even read right. How you think you're going to come up?' The only reason I graduated from grammar school is because I had a great jump shot. I went to high school and [my teacher] told me 'you will one of the greatest writers of all time.' I believed. You [have to] believe it. You can't believe [anything] if you're hating. You can't achieve [anything] if you're hating." [AOL Music]
• Gloria Allred is accusing David Letterman of "sexual favoritism." [MSNBC]
• Remember when Joe Francis attacked Jayde Nicole in a club? Apparently the incident was caught on a security cam video. You definitely see him drag her off of a barstool by the hair. [Radar Online]
• Michael Vick is getting his own show on BET. It's a "docu-series" spotlighting his comeback in football and also his difficult childhood and dog-fighting ring bust. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Kate Gosselin made fun of her mommy image in a skit on Jay Leno's show last night, telling photographers, "Leave me alone. Hey, what did Mommy say? I asked you to stop taking pictures and you continued… Go to your room," [ET]
• "Jon Gosselin: Kate is 'trying to prevent me from seeing my kids on their birthday.'" Eyeroll. [NY Daily News]
• Sponsors don't seem to give a shit that David Letterman hooked up with employees — there was a Disney commercial during his Tuesday show. [NY Times]
• Beastie Boy Adam Yauch had a cancerous tumor removed from his left parotid gland and says, "I'm taking Tibetan medicine and at the recommendation of the Tibetan doctors I've been eating a vegan/organic diet. I'm feeling healthy, strong and hopeful that I've beaten this thing, but of course time will tell." [TMZ]
• Julia Stiles and Bill Pullman are in the Broadway production of David Mamet's Oleanna. Stiles says: "I feel like Carol is one of the more well developed female parts he's written. There's something so interesting to me about how relentless and confrontational Carol is. For better or worse she's a force to be reckoned with. David Mamet is really good at writing characters that are flawed. There's something so fascinating about them in their bluntness." [NY Times]
• LisaRaye's new reality show will tell unflattering stories about Star Jones, Vivica A. Fox, and more. [Gatecrasher]
• "Prosecutors have declined to press charges against the sheriff's deputy who arrested Mel Gibson three years ago, citing a lack of proof he leaked details about the case." [AP]
• Alicia Keys is starting a new company, featuring a range of products; first up is The Barber's Daughters, handcrafted jewelry engraved with messages of hope. [Mirror]
• Stephanie Seymour's going through a divorce, and husband Peter Brant says she spent $50,000 a month on new clothes alone. [Gatecrasher]
• Matt Lucas's ex, Kevin McGee, who hanged himself Monday, had recently confessed his suicidal thoughts to a stranger at a gay bar. [The Sun]
• In the entertaining piece at the link, Phyllida Law — Emma Thompson's mother — talks about her daughter's struggle to have children, her adopted son from Rwanda, and her hoarding habit. [Daily Mail]
• Is Antonia Kidman getting married at her sister Nicole Kidman's estate in Sutton Forest, New South Wales, Australia? [News.com.au]
• Michael Sheen (The Queen, Frost Nixon, Underworld) plays legendary self-destructive soccer manager Brian Clough in a film called The Damned United, which is being called Sheen's "best performance of his big-screen career." [USA Today]
• Oh, yeah, and Michael Sheen also plays an Italian vampire in New Moon. But you already knew that. Twihard. [USA Today]
• Whatshername, the cagefighter, crossdressing, etc. [The Sun]
• "I love Susie Greene - she is so freeing. I analyze things from every which way. She just reacts without any kind of censor. Everything is an indignity, and she is absolutely sure of herself in every single response. All those doubts held me back for years: I wasn't good enough, I wasn't pretty enough, is this the right dress to wear? Susie Greene thinks she is drop-dead gorgeous and everything she chooses to put on is drop-dead gorgeous. Imagine being like that." — Susie Essman on her Curb Your Enthusiasm character. [NY Times]
• Q: What's your take on the Letterman sex scandal? Many people feel it's hypocrisy for him to throw darts at other's sexual misconduct when he's apparently been no better.
  A: "Here's the difference. A — it's his job to do that. And B — it just shows people don't really know what the story's about, which is the extortion. It has nothing to do with sex. And we're idiots when it comes to sexuality. We still think if you're single, you're a slut, you're awful! You should get married. People have sex! That's it. It's not the end of the world. It's really no big deal." — comedian Lewis Black. [Reuters]
• "Heath was just so full of ideas and fresh dialogue and so unbelievably fast and inventive. He was still, in some sense, speeding from playing The Joker, which had liberated him in a way that he had never experienced before. He was always telling me 'I am doing things in scenes that I didn't know was inside me. I cannot believe it.'" director Terry Gilliam, who cast Heath Ledger in The Imaginarium Of Dr. Parnassus. [Mirror]
• Check out Heath in a trailer at the link. [NY Daily News]
• "We gave our blessing. We decided that it was so touching and that it should go on the air. It was a wonderful testament to the work Adam did. I only wish he were here to help so many more." — DJ AM's mother, Andrea Gross, who decided that his show should go on the air on MTV. [TMZ]
• "I don't know how to swim. So, I never spent any time on a beach. That's the good news. The bad news is that if you are drowning, I cannot rescue you." — Bernadette Peters, at a skin cancer event. [Page Six]
• "I would do 20 Vicodin in a night. I was on my way out. I might have been 24 hours away from dying." — Robbie Williams. [The Sun]
• "She's a manifester, if there ever was one. First-rate manifester. Madonna makes things happen. Put Madonna up against any 23-year-old, she'll outwork them, outdance them, outperform them. The woman is broad. And, of course, here you go: I still love her. But she's retarded, too." — Guy Ritchie, to Esquire. [MSNBC Scoop]

• "I think people may have seen that and got the wrong idea about us," said the chief executive officer, and a former employee claims there is nothing sexual about it. Oh really? •  Wanna know what's on Obama's walls? The Times has a full list of the art on display in the White House. The pieces range from a Winslow Homer to a Degas to a Rothko, thus proving once again that the first family has good taste. •  A supermarket in Britain has issued an apology after a pregnant woman was denied an unpasteurized cheese by a concerned employee. She described the experience as the "most patronising encounter I have had the misfortune of experiencing in a long time." •  Recent legislation in Gaza that bans women from riding on motorbikes has raised concerns over efforts by Hamas to Islamise Palestinian society. While few women ride motorbikes, this seems to be part of a larger trend toward moralized legislation. •  Michael Vick, the football player most famous for his dogfighting bust, is getting a reality TV show. Although we hate PETA, we agree with them here: "People who abuse animals don't deserve to be rewarded. They shouldn't be given multimillion-dollar contracts...or given the privilege of being a role model." • A British man who had sex with his daughter over a period of 33 years and fathered two children by her has been sentenced to twelve years in prison. He pled guilty to two of incest, two rapes, 12 indecent assaults and two indecency with a child. • Here's a good reason to move to Sweden: Toys "R" Us has been reprimanded by an agency that polices advertising in Sweden after a group of sixth-graders learning about gender roles determined that boys were portrayed as active, but girls were passive in the store's 2008 Christmas catalog. • Mazen Abdel-Jawad, a 32-year-old Saudi man, has been sentenced to five years in prison and 1,000 lashes after boasting about his sexual conquests on TV. For being shown on TV with sex toys, condoms, and lubricants and cruising the streets for women he was charged with, "publicizing vice and confessing to crimes on a satellite television channel." • According to a new study from the University of Michigan, an increase in the number of cases of nasopharyngeal cancer, a rare condition in which a tumor grows behind the nose and above the tonsils, is linked to HPV. • University of Toronto researchers have invented a new technology that can measure tiny droplets of estrogen from samples of breast tissue the size of a needle. Currently doctors need to do a biopsy to collect such data, which could be useful to see the progress of breast cancer therapy, to see if a woman is at risk, or for other problems like infertility. The technology will not be ready for several years. • Katie Couric will be honored with the 2009 Al Neuharth Award for Excellence in the Media by the University of South Dakota, but a columnist for the school's student newspaper says she's not ready for the award. "A 'life-time achievement award' to Couric is jumping the gun," writes David Whitesock. "Despite Ms. Couric's laudable efforts to introduce the evening news to the Internet generation, she has fallen short of 'Evening News' predecessors." • Bob Dole, who lived next to Monica Lewinsky at the Watergate complex in the '90s said at a heath reform summit today, "If I'd had little wiretap there, I could've been president... I never had..... a conversation with that lady." • Before making his final decision on whether he should run for president, Barack met with Chicago politicians Newton Minow and Abner Mikva who have six daughters between them. Obama said he admired both men's daughters, and hoped his own daughters would grow up to be like them, and that he wouldn't run if the two men felt that doing so while the girls were so young would damage them in any way. • An Australian hospital psychologist has had his license suspended for just two months after telling a sexual assault victim that he was sex-obsessed, had "very strong sexual feelings for her" and that he had "fucked up big time" with her therapy. He treated her in 2004 and 2005 and authorities only learned of his misconduct after the woman threatened to kill herself and hospital staff found a noose in her home. • Advocates say advances in DNA technology, reforms in how police investigate rapes, and better prosecution of rapists are reducing the number of reported U.S. rapes. FBI statistics say 89,000 women reported being raped in 2008, down brom the 109,062 reported rapes in 1992. • Julie Parker, 80, is the oldest and longest-tenured employee at Yosemite National Park. "Julia interprets Native American culture to our visitors," says a park spokesman. "She shows visitors how baskets were woven, toys or brushes were made and acorns collected from native black oak trees, ground up using a metate and made into mush... Julia is truly a national treasure." • It took Patrick Mills of Florida two days to get a nine week old kitten out of his car's engine compartment. Someone heard meowing coming from his engine, but Mills and firefighters were unable to coax the cat out even with donated milk from Starbucks and tuna from Panera Bread. The cat was finally frightened from her hiding spot when a Feline Friends of Destin volunteer rattled a metal coat hanger in the engine. The volunteer took the cat home and said she's healthy except for a minor cold. •

• Does Jay-Z reference Anna Wintour in his song "Empire State of Mind"? The line in question is: "caught up in the in crowd/now you're in-style/and in the winter gets cold en vogue with your skin out." [Fashion Week Daily]

• Earlier today it was reported that Michael Vick had resigned with Nike two years after the company dropped him when he was sent to prison for dogfighting. His agent said, "Mike has a long-standing, great relationship with Nike, and he looks forward to continuing that relationship." But, now Nike has released a statement saying it has not "contractual relationship" with Vick and it merely, "agreed to supply product to Michael Vick as we do a number of athletes who are not under contract with Nike." [AP]
• Michel Phan of the ESSEC Business School, which runs the world's only luxury brand management MBA program, says luxury retailers in Asia need to focus more on service. He explains: "It's not enough to say 'Our brand is expensive, or known'. You have to make customers connect with your brand, especially during this crisis, when they're more reluctant to buy on the spur of the moment. You have to give people a good reason to buy." [Reuters]
• Peter Copping, the new designer of Nina Ricci, says Ricci's romantic designs are in line with his personal taste and belief that customers want feminine clothes. In his previous job at Louis Vuitton, he says, "whenever we did more feminine-based collections, the sales were always incredible in the stores as opposed to the more austere or hard-edged things... Obviously, one has to find a way to make that contemporary, modern and fashionable." [WWD]
• On Tuesday, Giles Deacon received an award from France's National Association for the Development of the Fashion Arts along with a grant of $233,470 that will finance his spring fashion show in Paris. [WWD]
• Timberland has collaborated with Wyclef Jean to design a line of 16 boots. For every pair sold $2 will be donated to Yéle Haiti Foundation to support reforestation in Haiti. [WWD]
• At the D&G runway show in Milan, the chief executives of Saks Fifth Avenue, Neiman Marcus, and Bergdorf Goodman were put in the second and third rows while the chief executive of Yoox.com was in the front row. Bloggers have been invited to New York shows for a few seasons, but Europe is just warming to fashion bloggers who write for sites like Bryanboy.com, JakandJil.com, and GaranceDore.fr. [WSJ]
• Artist Brian Einersen created a Lady Gaga comic book that's selling at Marc Jacobs stores for $2. [Fashionista]
• Gareth Pugh is considering doing a fast-fashion line. He says: "I have considered it. The offers have come in, and every time we get an offer, I mull it over. I'd like more people to have access to my clothes, but the timing hasn't been right, or the project hasn't been right, or some combination of both those things. The first time I was approached, I wasn't even producing the garments I was showing on the runway. I didn't have a factory. Everything I was making, I was making by hand. Doing a fast-fashion collection seemed a little premature." He says companies should, "Keep asking. And I'll keep thinking." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Robert Lee Morris had to create toned down versions of his jewelry in during the recession in the early '90s, but now his more showy creations are becoming popular again. They were featured in several runway shows this fall and Henri Bendel will open a Robert Lee Morris boutique tomorrow. [N.Y. Times]
• At a party celebrating Sundance Channel's new show Man Shops Globe about Anthropologie buyer at large, Keith Johnson introduced guests to his partner Glen Senk, who fell in love with him in grade school. "I moved next door to him, at age 9, and the first day I saw him, I fell in love with him," Senk said. "It was otherworldly. I felt sparks all over my body. Literally, I saw stars. He was the kindest, sweetest, most wonderful person. I feel like that 44 years later." Johnson said, "It took a few years to convince me... He didn't convince me until I was 12." [N.Y. Times]
• Paolo Colonna, a partner in Permira, the European private equity firm that bought the Valentino Fashion Group, said that though the fund usually exits its private equity investments after four or five years, but, "The various [economic] crises will delay our exit. Still, we are patient money. This is a long-term deal for us. I don't see any urgency to sell at these low valuations." [NY Times]
• Giorgio Armani has reorganized his company, expanding the board of directors and delegating more power to non-family members. He's been suffering with a bout of hepatitis for months and says his illness was worsened by working long hours for decades. The reorganization is raising questions about whether the brand can outlive Armani. [WSJ]
• Pam Grier says, "I'm hoping the Smithsonian will call me for the dress from Foxy Brown. The blue one with the ruffles. I'm holding onto it. Call me, Smithsonian!" [Village Voice]

[East Rutherford, New Jersey; September 3. Image via Getty]

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ - SEPTEMBER 3: New York Jets fans hold up a stuffed animal in protest against quarterback Michael Vick of the Philadelphia Eagles (not in photo) during the NFL preseason game between the Philadelphia Eagles and the New York Jets at Giants Stadium on September 3, 2009 in East Rutherford, New Jersey. (Photo by Jim McIsaac/Getty Images)

• Amy Winehouse was hospitalized for dehydration after she "fainted after being out in the sun and without drinking water. She has been taking part in a lot of activities which also played a part."[TheSun]

• In a bit of good news for the singer, however, Amy has won a high-court harassment injunction that forces paparazzi to stay at least 100 meters from her home. [Guardian]
• "I do really intellectually highbrow stuff in my downtime. I read first-edition Shakespeare. I write poetry. I'm trying to get my masters in neuroscience. That's the kind of guy I am...man, I don't even know what a masters is."-Robert Pattinson[Guardian]
• Meanwhile, Jay Leno admits that his hospitalization was for exhaustion. "That's like a rich person's condition. Poor people that work – they don't get exhausted," Leno says, "Only rich people get exhausted. It's an embarrassing thing." [People]
• "Probably the sexiest woman I know is my mother. She's an ethereal angel. Nobody looks like that woman. If I could meet my mother and marry her, I would. I would be with my mother now, if she weren't my mother, as sick as that sounds." -Shia LaBeouf[ Star]
• Is Lauren Conrad coming back to The Hills? "She kind of realized, especially in this economy, there's not much else out there for her," says a source, "What else can she do that would earn as much?" Also returning to the Hills, my Laguna Beach favorite, Kristin Cavallari.[PageSix]
• Bristol Palin is reportedly still trying to "control" her ex, Levi Johnston. "What Bristol is doing amounts to emotional blackmail," says a source, "She no longer wants Levi in her life and is threatening to have him cut out of their newborn son Tripp's life." [NationalEnquirer]
• "I get to travel and go to London and Paris, while this person sits by the computer writing mean things about me. I'd rather be the one traveling."-Miley Cyrus on Perez Hilton. [ShowbizSpy]
• Sadness! 120 Minutes host Matt Pinfield has checked himself into rehab. "I've been struggling with a dependency that I need to address," Pinfield says, "I want to have a life, I don't want to be a statistic . . . It's the fight of my life, but you know what, I'm gonna win." [PageSix]
• Cindy Crawford's husband, Rande Gerber is being sued by two former employees, who claim that Gerber sexually harassed them while they worked as waitresses at the Moonstone Lounge, a part of the Hard Rock Hotel of San Diego. Gerber's rep denies the allegations: "These allegations were previously investigated and shown to be baseless. This lawsuit has no merit." [E!]
• Ouch: Scarlett Johansson's directorial debut was cut from the upcoming New York, I Love You for being "unwatchable." [PageSix]
• John Mayer's new romance is apparently over already; a rep for the singer claims that Mayer and Scheana Marie are "no longer in contact. She's been exaggerating her interactions with him." [E!]
• Oh, snap! Lily Allen was rejected when she tried to give a friendly hello kiss to Joan Collins. "Omg , was just introduced to joan collins, shook her hand and went to kiss her on the cheek," Lily wrote on her Twitter page. Apparently Joan's response was "I don't kiss people I don't know." Nobody messes with Alexis Morrell Carrington Colby Dexter Rowan! [TheSun]
• Lady Gaga has a new boyfriend, and his name is Speedy. [TheSun]
• "The reason I am in Los Angeles is that I'm making a television show that I can be proud of. One of my principle goals in life is to avoid embarrassing my children by doing what I do. And I think I've just about managed that."-Hugh Laurie [DailyMail]
• Casey Aldrige the father of Jamie Lynn Spears' baby, has been released from the hospital after sustaining injuries from a car accident. [People]
• Brigitte Bardot is speaking out against the slaughter of Egyptian pigs, a precautionary move meant to stop the potential spread of swine flu: "Taking advantage of the global hysteria over the propagation of 'Mexican' flu, which has nothing to do with animals, in order to launch a campaign to exterminate pigs raised by a destitute section of the population is extremely cowardly," Bardot says. [TimesOnline]
• A bouncer claims that Jon Gosselin is always on his best behavior when out with friends at a club: "He always has his wedding band on," the bouncer says, "He talks about his kids all the time. He loves his family." [People]
• PETA has backed out of a deal with Michael Vick, as the organization believes he's still not sorry for his crime: "Our No. 1 goal at PETA is to prevent cruelty to animals," says PETA's Dan Shannon, "I believe a genuine, contrite Michael Vick could convince people not to get involved in dog fighting. What we don't believe at this point is that there is a contrite, remorseful Michael Vick. At this point, it looks like there's zero chance." [AdAge]
• Kate Winslet on confronting the mean girls in her life: "I was shopping with my mum and we walked into a department store and I saw this girl behind the make-up counter who had been the ringleader of the mean girls at school. I walked up to her and said: 'Hello, how are you?' She said 'Oh fine, how are you?', a bit panicky because she remembered how much of a bitch she'd been and suddenly I was a bit well-known and she was very embarrassed. And I said:'So, working at a make-up counter, then?' This girl was going to be a model and her dad was going to buy her a car if she grew her fingernails. I said: 'Don't you want to be a model or a dancer?' She: 'No, I'm just waiting for, um, y'know a couple of contracts to come in and am doing this for the time being' and then she said: 'Things good for you then?' and I said: 'Yeah, they are - and I want to say thanks for being such a bitch 'cos you made me much, much stronger, so thanks a lot,' and walked off! And I thought: 'Yeeees! Come on!'"[DailyMail]

• Poor Fergie reportedly barfed all over herself while at the Minnesota State Fair. Maybe it was all the fried food on a stick? [Dlisted]
  
• Speaking of Minnesota: Republican Senator Larry Craig got busted by the police for "lewd behavior" in the gentleman's room of a Minnesota airport. Hasn't the Land Of 10,000 Lakes been through enough?! [Crooks and Liars]
  
• Michael Vick is going to jail and rightly so. But lets also remember that we live in a country where the man behind the Katrina debacle, Michael Chertoff, may be getting a promotion. [BBC]
  
• President Bush says that poor little Alberto Gonzalez endured "unfair treatment" during his tenure as Attorney General. [CNN]

• Speaking of Bush, French president Nicolas Sarkozy is starting to sound eerily like him: He's gunning for Iran. Sigh. [NYT]
  
• The U.N., Christy Turlington, and Russell Simmons are banding together to promote some sorta World Peace Through Yoga Day. It's like Sesame Street: One of these things is not like the other. And by that we mean, we've never seen any of those U.N. dudes successfully execute scorpion pose. [ABC News]
  
• "You could feel her bones sticking through. She's on the cusp - she looks good now but if she takes it any further, she's going to start to look ill. She's incredibly compulsive. The Spice Girls' reunion is a huge deal for her and she wants to look her very best for her moment back in the limelight." Alas, this quote isn't about Victoria Beckham, but Geri "Ginger Spice" Halliwell. Note to Geri: Starvation is not what "Girl Power" is all about. [Malaysia Sun]
  
• Yay for gender equality? Now it's not just women who have to worry about the aftermath of hormone replacement therapy: Men who take testosterone supplements could suffer major kidney damage. [CNN]

• A musical about the life and times of Clay Aiken and his obsessive fans is no longer bound for Broadway. [TMZ]
  
• Next time someone tells you you're rude for yawning at them, correct them and explain that you're actually empathizing. [News.com.au]
  
• Raise the legal drinking age in England? Fuck no! [BBC]
  
• New Jersey Buddhists have released animals bought in NYC's Chinatown into the wilds of New Jersey, hoping they reach their "karmic potential." Run, Thumper, run! [MSNBC]

• Dude, we just hate it when baby bibs are contaminated with lead, don't you? We aren't going to say it, but they're made in China. [CNN]
• What? The Bush administration is going to label another group of Arab / Middle Eastern folk terrorists? Shocking. [NYT]
• So many fantasies, coming true: Barack Obama. To appear on The Tyra Banks Show. Please God let Ms. J show up for that one to give our boy Barry O some runway stomping tips! [ABC News]
• Wow. Shocking. Another couple formed from The Bachelor call of their engagement. [People]